I’m back.
Isn’t that always how it goes with these things? You try to get fit. You give up. You get distracted. Then weeks/months/years go by. And for whatever reason it feels time again. I’m not sure where the inspiration comes from.
Things feel different this time around. Though if I’m honest doesn’t it always feel like that? Who knows if it’s rational or not.
Tomorrow I start crossfit foundations. Holy cow, right? We’ll see. It’s 3 weeks, how bad can it be? I did the teaser class a little over a week ago. I’d be lying if I don’t still feel it just the tiniest bit. For the first few days I had t-rex arms. But I also had a crap ton of endorphins that I hadn’t felt in a long time. It felt good. Like maybe I can do this.
A couple of weeks ago I weighed 215lbs. Last I checked I was back down to 211lbs. Maybe we can make Tuesdays = truthy tuesdays. I’ll weigh in just once a week. But we all know scales are only truthy not truthful. There’s something in those numbers sometimes. But it isn’t everything. It isn’t everything. It isn’t everything.
I’m back to mfp. Not taking it too seriously. Trying to just use it as motivation to hit my protein goals of 123g (what a nice number huh?) Trying to hit 1g per pound of lbm. I have no idea what my lbm is, but that seemed approximately right. Trying to keep carbs at around the same. Not low-carbing it just yet, just reducing it. I eat bready things when I’m out and about. I try keep carbs to just beans/plain corn tortillas/rice/nuts/dairy/veggies/tubers/fruit/dark chocolate here at home. By keeping the total at 123g or so it means a small serving at most meals. Very zone-esque I guess?
It feels balanced. It feels good. I don’t know if we want to call it paleo or not. We might just call it the plan where I stop eating french fries everyday. In any case it seems to be working alright for now.
So much has changed since I last wrote here. I work from home now which means my excuses for why I couldn’t cook my own damn lunch or why I couldn’t make it to the gym just flew out the window. I’m much happier about the switch for many reasons. I feel content.
I also have a lot of nervous energy. I can’t sleep very well. I’ve been getting this weird thing where my arms have pins and needles feelings when I’m falling asleep. The internet says I might have carpal tunnel or maybe a stroke. Its always a stroke. Could it be that I’m just fat? That the weight of my body is crushing my nerves? Why would it happen only when I’m lying down. The internet also says I could be anxious. Is anyone not anxious?
I thought maybe the insomnia could be related to the lower carbs. The internet seems to think that’s a possibility as well. In any case I need to figure out this sleep thing. I’m reading all kinds of paleo blogs that are obsessed with the importance of sleep. Saying once night’s sleep is the equivalent to like 6 months of fast food dieting. What??
So I’m going to try to sleep more. Going to try to continue this new thing of eating well. Going to try working out more than I’ve ever worked out in my life. I’m trying not to look at the past 1.5 years as a total fail. Yes I gained back all the weight. But I also got a job doing what I loved. When that fell apart I got another job, this one I love even more. I also got married to literally the best person. Best person for me anyway.
So yeah I gained 25lbs. Life happened. Fortunately, it was in the best way possible. So no beating myself up. All that I need to know is that I’m back.
