A Sense of Humour (Chrono Trigger)
Chapter I
“I hope you don’t intend to eat those,” Lucca remarked, raising her eyebrows at the collection of leeches Frog had accumulated on the shore. The waters near the Ioka camp, she remembered, were generally fine for swimming or bathing, and to have found more than a single leech would have taken half an hour. The pile- a dozen, at least- writhed and squirmed, causing Lucca to shudder and opt to look at Frog instead. “Kino and a few others hunted down a boar for dinner. Really, there’s no need to resort to-”
“I believed you to be joking. Of course it was never my intent to eat them. Marle’s healing magic thus far has been ineffective, has it not? I intend to try a remedy from my time. I cannot trust cavemen to attempt any healing practices on Crono; they might smash his skull in.” Rolling his eyes, Frog laid a handkerchief down and carefully folded the leeches into a sac. “I don’t believe I’ll find any more here. This will have to do.”
“They just might,” Lucca conceded, “but Marle would at least be able to solve that.” She sighed, the sound drowned out by the rushing water. “If she brought herself to try. She’s grown depressed by her inability to help and wanted me to leave. I’ll accompany you back, though.”
The return trip was long and insects that must later have evolved into mosquitoes bit them as they traversed the forests. It was not necessary to speak, as both were at a loss for how Crono had become so ill or how he could be cured. Bloodletting was a last effort for the desperate group, because they could not travel to a more advanced time unless Crono was able to make it through the portals or onto the Epoch. Lucca didn’t like it, and she suspected neither would anyone else, but at least Frog had come up with an idea when no one else had.
“Lucca back! Frog back!” Ayla seemed to notice the moment they stepped into her territory. Perhaps it was instinctive as the chief, Frog suspected. Perhaps she could smell them, Lucca grimly hypothesized.
She also seemed to notice immediately that the sac was moving. “Frog bring Ayla present? Taste good?” she guessed. “Smaller, less talking frog?”
“Ladies and their fascination with consuming leeches! I shall never understand you,” he replied, visibly concerned. “Is my lord Crono awake?”
Almost violently, Ayla’s mess of hair shook back and forth. “But Crono hut, okay come. Friends there.” She scampered towards it, leaving Frog and Lucca little choice but to follow, wondering whether Marle had indeed returned to try again.
It was a guest room near Ayla’s larger hut, though no one was quite sure what sort of guests Ayla had expected. It was a bit of an upgrade to the standard huts, its size sufficient for a firepit to blaze in the centre. Lucca did not trust the fire safety measures of cavemen any more than Frog believed in their medical expertise, however, and had insisted Frog, Marle, or, if no one else, Magus be present at all times if they were to light it. Being that Frog had just entered behind her, it was clear none of them had been. Her jaw clenched for a moment and she reassured herself first that nothing had happened and second that Robo would have carried Crono out if sparks had flown.
“My attempts to convey the uselessness of a fire when Crono’s temperature is normal have been in vain,” Robo answered before Lucca could point out the lack of a water magic-user. “Marle will not speak to me and I did not know the whereabouts of you or Magus. Failing this, my only option was to keep watch over the room. My batteries are running low, however.”
“No charging stations in this time period, can’t do much…” Lucca muttered. “It’s alright, we’re back now. If you’d like to power down for a night, I’ll wake you if anything interesting happens.”
“Your ideas are constantly impressive, but this one strikes me as genius.” Lucca had no time to respond before Robo pressed his power button.
He must have been exhausted, she mused, folding his limbs and setting him against the wall. And absolutely trusting. He would not wake up on his own, but did not need to think twice to know she would be true to her word.
“Ayla kiss Crono many time. Robo try heal Crono too. Nothing,” the Ioka chief spoke, sounding uncharacteristically empty. “But not give up! What present Frog bring?”
“Dislike me not, but these are leeches. I expect it is not a prevalent method as of now, but bloodletting shall balance his humours and set him right.”
“Crono sense of humour not problem!” Ayla countered. “Frog sadistic if think this joke!”
She crouched with her hands slowly flexing and curling into fists, prepared to fight him if he dared to lay a leech on Crono. Frog’s webbed hands did not even inch toward the hilt of the Masamune. “You forget I come from a time millions of years ahead of you in medical progress. You would do well to acknowledge this. I fear Crono will awaken, should we argue.”
“He’s already awake,” Lucca cut in, silencing the others. Crono weakly waved a hello. “My guess would be speaking hurts him, and for the same reason, he’d rather not move.”
The fire in Ayla’s eyes died down, allowing room for something more sympathetic. Their solutions differed, but pain was a universal experience.
“My apologies, lord Crono.” Frog’s voice was gentle and sincere, despite knowing it had not been his voice to awaken Crono. “But I suppose it is necessary for him to be lucid, if we are to use bloodletting. He ought to know what we are doing.” He set the handkerchief down and the edges folded outwards to show the same squirming bloodsuckers.
Ayla, reluctantly accepting the method, crawled to Crono’s other side and took his hand. “No watch. Looks gross.”
“Yes… it does,” Lucca agreed, standing and stepping back. “It’s- hot in here, I think, I’m going to step outside.”
“Perhaps I am the pot calling the kettle black, but don’t you seem a bit green?”
Failing to reply, Lucca made her way outside. In no universe could she fathom watching someone- even Frog- allowing leeches to suck on Crono’s extremities. No, she wasn’t going back inside. She wasn’t going to move an inch until she could get the hell out and was confident her stomach would not flip.
Maybe she would try to find Marle. It was possible she had stayed in the meeting grounds, but Lucca suspected she would have preferred to preserve her vanity and escape the public eye to cry. She was not merely ashamed, Lucca knew. For at least a month Lucca had caught her stealing dreamy glances at Crono when they slept. Crono meant everything to them, but somehow more than everything to Marle, and if Crono did not survive she was sure Marle would blame herself and follow suit.
Several Ioka men and women were crowding around another fire in the meeting grounds, roasting the boar Kino had proudly shot, but Marle was not present. Nor was she in Ayla’s home or the trading hut. Lucca hated to think she had run off into the forest alone, hated more to think that would grant her the most privacy, and hated most that Magus was the familiar face she spotted first.