[eewpoems]

I took you to my spot. The place I go to get away from the chaos of this world. Here, I let you into the madness of my mind. Never again will that spot just be mine. Never again will my madness feel isolated. You took me in. You made me feel less mad. That spot is a part of both our lives now because it is stained by the memories of us. And I regret nothing.

To the one I hope I never lose

[eewpoems]

You shot across the sky as I wished for someone like you. In the moment, it was all a dream, a hope for a better future I never thought I could achieve. Then suddenly there you were dressed as everything I once wished for. You fell out of the sky right into me. You were my shooting star. You were my asteroid.

My dream come true

[eewpoems]

I knew you were different when my 11:11 wish was no longer about me but about your well being.

The moment I fell in love

[eewpoems]

We are mere humans drowning under our inflated egos.

[eewpoems]

That's the thing about bipolar depression...I hated myself so much yesterday and all I wanted was to die. But today I am so confident in myself and I feel as if the world is my oyster...You never know when each extreme will end.

11/15/15 Journal Entry

[eewpoems]

My depression is not beautiful. It's struggling to find a reason to get out of bed every morning. It's laying in bed wide awake every night bc my thoughts never cease. My depression is not a fairy tale. It's a reality of a looming darkness no matter what. It leaves me empty, hopeless, and numb when the voices whisper their devastating thoughts. My depression is not your aesthetic.

MY depression

[eewpoems]

The hand that hits me is connected to the arms I want to hold me when I'm hurting.

I love him but he hurts me

[eewpoems]

You had me wondering why you wanted me (You left me wondering why you didn't want me) When I was with you, you were my world (You decided I no longer meant the world to you) Together we were unstoppable (Alone I have become invincible)

Unhealthy Relationships

[eewpoems]

I was putty in your hands and you molded me into something I never should have been.

[eewpoems]

"My whole life I thought I was an Aspen. Changing with the seasons, coming and going. It wasn't until I turned 18 and reality hit. My whole life I longed to uproot it all. Until I realized that meant leaving it all behind. That was when I realized that I was no Aspen. I was a simple pine. Always remaining and never changing because after all, I craved the familiarity."

Reality check 10/14/15

[eewpoems]

"We are so little and our distance so large, what a beautiful thing it is to know that we can be connected by something as simple as the moon. "

[eewpoems]

I was paper thin today You asked how I was And all I needed was one tiny push You could have had me in pieces I almost poured my heart out But you didn't push So I didn't rip apart It would have been a flood You wouldn't have wanted to mop up the mess anyway

8/26/15 Journal Entry

[eewpoems]

We're all just souls drunk off the idea that we're worth anything more.

4am Meteor Shower Thoughts

[eewpoems]

...but at 17 I'm wishing life would end rather than wishing for it to begin...

Journal Excerpt

[eewpoems]

I want to be whole again, but it's hard when you don't even know what being whole is anymore.

8/13/15

[eewpoems]

My name sounds like bliss when it comes from your lips.

[eewpoems]

I woke up missing you and an ache in my heart

8:30am