You've never been much of an "alpha male", and frankly, you're fine with that. Your childhood is a classic tale: always last picked in school sports, struggled to make many guy friends, called every homophobic slur under the sun just for having basic hygiene. Despite it all, you ended up in an alright place—a quiet and unassuming existence.
Then, you met Kazuha, and your quiet and unassuming existence turned upside down.
"He ordered the chicken sandwich, not the burger," she scolds, dropping the tray of food onto the counter with enough force to send a couple fries flying.
You meekly tug her sleeve. "It's fine, really—"
"Hush, baby." In an instant, she shuts you up with a quick glance with those piercing eyes. "Let momma handle this."
"I'm so sorry, ma'am," the cashier says with his squeaky, prepubescent voice. "I'll have the kitchen put a rush on his chicken sandwich right away. Uh, may I interest you in a free dessert for your troubles?"
Kazuha turns to you, patiently waiting for your answer.
"Uh, I guess a vanilla milkshake wouldn't be so bad—"
"Vanilla milkshake," she repeats, leaning against the counter. "And no cherries. My boyfriend doesn't like cherries."
The cashier gulps, his Adam's apple practically disappearing in sheer terror. "U-uh, yes ma'am. No cherries. Understood."
"Good." Kazuha shoots him one final glare before taking your hand and leading you back to your booth.
"You didn't have to do that," you mutter. "I would've been fine with the burger."
She slinks into the seat across from you with a huff. "It's not what you ordered though. And I know how much you like the chicken sandwich at this place."
You shrug. "The burger isn't that bad."
"Then why didn't you order the burger?" She raises her brow in that "I'm right and you know it" kinda way that you're all too familiar with.
"Well…"
Kazuha reaches across the table and lifts up your chin, forcing you to meet her eyes. "Repeat after me: Thank you for fixing my order, Kazuha. You're the best," she says in a high-pitched voice.
You chuckle softly. "I don't sound like that."
"Say it."
"Thank you for—"
"Do it in the voice."
"Wha—I'm not gonna do t—"
"Do it!"
Her outburst attracts some unwanted attention from other tables, making you shrink in your seat. "Kazuha, people are looking…"
Her lips curl into that smirk—the one that never fails to make your heart do a somersault even after eight months of dating. "Aw, sorry," she brushes her thumb against your bottom lip, "did I embarrass you, baby?"
"W-whatever." You pull away before you do something that'll get both of you kicked out for overt PDA. "Thanks for fixing my order. You're the best," you utter flatly.
Kazuha sits back, arms behind her head and chin held high like those cool kids in old movies. "I know. I'm pretty fuckin' sick."
"And humble too."
The cashier from earlier drops off your food, making an effort to avoid looking Kazuha in the eye. "Here you go, is there anything else I can get you two?" he asks.
Kazuha looks over at you for an answer. "No, thank you," you say. You swear you see him breathe a heavy sigh of relief as he walks away. Poor guy.
"I feel bad," you unwrap your chicken sandwich, the one you ordered initially. "He's probably got enough things going on without us giving him grief."
"Relax babe, we're doing him a favor. Now he knows not to mess up people's orders," she points out, coolly tossing a fry into her mouth.
"Still," you linger on the flakes of salt on her lip for a second too long, "you know how badly service people are treated on the daily. I don't wanna add to that."
"Then don't. I'll do it for you," she smirks.
"Kazuha, that's not funny."
"What, I didn't laugh."
"Yeah, but you're smiling."
"I'm smiling because you're cute."
You bite your tongue, unwilling to give her the satisfaction of a grin. Unknowingly or not, she sets her food to the side and leans forward, eyeing you like a piece of art.
"Ugh, I hate when you do that," you mutter.
"Do what? I'm just lookin' at ya." Her eyes trace over your lips, and you wonder if she'll like the taste of that new chapstick you just bought.
"I'm trying to eat."
"Am I disturbing your eating?" You feel her foot press against your calf, drawing slow lines with the toe of her boot.
Trying to win against Kazuha is a sisyphean task. She does what she wants, and you follow her around like a loyal puppy. Behave well enough, she'll give you a treat—and just like any puppy, you like your treats.
"Not here, at least," you pout. "I haven't had a single thing to eat all day."
"Aww." She gives you one last drag against your leg before settling back into her seat. "Okay, I'll let you eat."
"Thank you."
Even then, you find your foot gently rubbing against hers as you eat. You can act annoyed all you want, but face it: you're completely smitten with Kazuha.
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"Baby?" Kazuha grabs a leather jacket off of the rack and holds it up to her torso. "What do you think?"
"I think," you sigh, "you have way too many leather jackets."
"What's wrong with that? I'm a collector."
"That looks exactly like the one you bought last week." You take a closer look at the oddly familiar looking tag. "I'm pretty sure that is the exact same one."
"Oh." She takes one last look at it before putting it back. "See, this is why I like having you around. I've probably saved, like, a billion dollars thanks to you."
"Whatever," you chuckle, linking your arm with hers. It's just common sense, you think, but the warmth of her compliment is leagues better than being right.
The two of you pass by racks and racks full of the new wave of summer trends. Personally, you've always been a fan of the fall—cardigans, sweaters, the ability to wear jeans without your legs feeling like tinfoil-wrapped burritos. You and summer are just a match made in Hell. Inevitably, it comes around to torment you for three months out of the year and you're forced to scramble for a wardrobe that won't burn you alive.
"See anything you like?" Kazuha asks.
You scan the men's section, grimacing at the typical suspects that plague the shelves—tank tops, cargo shorts, ugly graphic tees with abominations like "summer vibes" written all over them. "Not really."
"You sure?" She grabs a simple black tank top off the rack. "This one seems pretty nice."
You physically restrain yourself from rolling your eyes. Something like that would only look good on her, with her pretty arms that are deceptively strong, and when she flexes, you can see the shadows dance around her biceps, which reminds you of that one time she put you in a chokehold as a joke and you could feel her muscles pushing against your throat, and you were so mesmerized by the feeling that you forgot to fight back, and—
"Baby?" Kazuha shakes you out of your trance. "You okay?" she chuckles.
"I-I'm good." You wipe away the droplet of drool that almost leaked from your lips. "Let's keep looking."
Deeper and deeper through the men's section you go, yet nothing seems to tickle your fancy. Go figure. You knew looking for clothes this time of year would be futile, but Kazuha wanted to hang out and you already said yes before realizing how much of a waste of time this would amount to.
"Ugh, these all suck," you groan.
"Maybe we'd have found something by now if you weren't so picky," Kazuha points out, brow raised at you.
"Not all of us were born to look good in just about anything," you bite back with a cheesy grin. "Some of us have to put effort into looking nice."
"Hey, don't blame me for being sexy." She drapes her arm around your shoulders, and for a split second, you think she's going to put you into another chokehold. So close. "I don't want you overheating just because you're being stubborn, baby."
"I'm not being stubborn, I just—"
You glance over at the women's section and stop at one of the mannequins. It's wearing a simple outfit, fitting for the weather, but what catches your eyes is the skirt—floor length and ruffled, made of a pure white cotton that seems to dance, even on the still mannequin.
For one reason or another, you can't take your eyes off of it. It wouldn't be too hard to fit into your current wardrobe, and it's a much nicer alternative to the dull beige of all the cargo shorts that seems to infect every corner of the men's options. But, it's just—you're a guy, and Kazuha, well—you already wonder why she even likes you, and—
Kazuha follows your gaze. "Are you getting the hots for the mannequin?" she teases.
"W-what? No, I just—maybe we can find somewhere else to—"
She grips your hand before you have a chance to escape. "Hey, be honest with me." Her voice turns softer, more sincere compared to her usual mischief. "What's going on?"
"Nothing, I—" You peer into her round eyes. They're void of any kind of judgment or disgust, the usual reaction you expect when girls you're interested learn of your 'peculiar tastes'. "I just thought the skirt was pretty. That's all."
"Pretty on me, or pretty on you?"
"Well, of course you'd look pretty in it—"
"Hey." She tilts your chin up, the tip of her thumb pressing your bottom lip. You practically sink into her touch. Never have you felt a presence safer than Kazuha's.
"I… wanna try it on," you admit shyly. "Is that okay?"
She bares her pretty white teeth at you before pressing a soft kiss onto your lips. "Of course you can, baby. You don't need my permission to wear whatever you want."
Heat creeps up your cheeks like lava bubbling to the top of a volcano. "Thanks," you utter, biting back your excitement at the thought of looking pretty.
The second your staring at your reflection in the dressing room mirror, the ruffled skirt in your hands, it all starts to feel a little too real. Your first ever skirt. The thought has crossed your mind a handful of times before, but you never thought you'd actually get to this point. If it weren't for Kazuha and her charming eyes, this moment would just be another figment of your imagination.
You take a deep breath, and you put it on—it fits. Your reflection doesn't look half bad either. The breeze between your legs will take some getting used to, and you'll need to be wary of what color underwear you wear with these, but for now, you're just in awe of how good it looks. How good you look.
You do a little twirl for fun, giggling at the way the dress flows like petals on a blooming flower. Kazuha knocks against the dressing room door. "Did you try it on yet? I wanna see."
"Yeah! Come in."
As soon as Kazuha sees you, her expression drops. In that moment, worry starts to creep into your mind.
Does she not like it?
Does she not like you?
Will she leave just like the rest of them?
All your anxieties are laid to rest as Kazuha envelops you into a tight squeeze. "Holy fuck, my boyfriend is so pretty," she breathes, rocking you back and forth in her arms. You immerse yourself in her warmth, the kind of warmth that steadies your heart and quiets your mind; the kind you want to feel every day until you die.
"Does that mean you like it?" you ask.
"I love it," she says, pecking your lips. "I'm totally buying you every single color they have."
You chuckle at her enthusiasm. "Maybe we can just stick to this one for now? Until I get used to it, at least."
"That's fine with me." Her lips find yours once again, this one a little longer, a little more tender. "It really suits you, baby."
This kiss leaves you wobbly-kneed and blubbering, reduced to a puddle of lovestruck goop in her arms. Her strong, toned arms that you somehow fit perfectly in between.
"Let's hurry up and pay for it so I can take it off you later tonight," she winks, shutting the door behind her and leaving you to feel like the luckiest boy on the planet.
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The two of you kick off your shoes by the front door of your apartment, tossing the shopping bags haphazardly on your coffee table. Those will be for future you to deal with; right now, your feet are dead from all the walking and your body is in desperate need of a bed to collapse on.
"C'mon, c'mon, c'mon," Kazuha urges, dragging you to your bedroom. In there, she collapses back onto your bed, arms above her head and her eyes staring you down like a hawk to a little mouse. "Hurry up and take me, pretty boy."
"O-oh." You gulp. "You mean, like, right now? Um—"
"What's that?" Kazuha asks, a smirk growing on her lips. On your usually tidy desk, a small pile of crumpled tissues sits next to your closed laptop, and the memory of what you did last night hits you all at once.
"W-wait, it's not what it looks like—!"
"You little freak!" Before you have a chance to explain yourself, Kazuha jumps to her feet, grabbing at your laptop with the cunning of a fox. "Ooh, let's see what kind of perversions you were watching!"
"Kazuha, don't—"
She flips open your laptop, and on the screen lies a still of the last scene you had watched—a boy with cerebral palsy and his grandma overlooking the edge of a mountain.
"What?" Kazuha asks. "Where's the porn?"
"I wasn't watching porn," you sigh in embarrassment, "I was watching a movie."
She gasps. "An adult movie?!"
"No!"
Kazuha falls into a fit of giggles. Real mature of her.
"I was watching a… sad movie." You point at the pile of tissues. "I was crying…"
"Aw." She holds your head to her chest, kissing the top of your scalp. "Sorry, I didn't mean to make of fun of you for crying."
"It's fine." It's impossible to be upset with her when she feels this nice.
"Was it good? Can I watch it with you?"
"You want to? What about the whole, um, 'taking you' thing?"
She chuckles softly. "Maybe some other time. Walking around all day has got me feeling lazy." Kazuha crawls into your bed, cozying up under your covers. "C'mon, I wanna watch!"
You relent, following her onto your bed. "I might cry again."
"That's okay," she wraps you in her embrace, "mama's here."
You drag the little red dot all the way to the beginning and hit play, safe and sound in her arms.
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"Grandma?" Chunhe utters, cradling the box of his beloved cat's ashes in his arms.
"Hmm?" she replies.
"After you take me to school, I'll buy you a meal at the cafeteria."
His grandma smiles at him. "All right."
"And then," Chunhe continues, "Buy yourself a train ticket and go wherever you want. Go look around. Go have some fun. Let me walk the rest of my path my way. All right?"
His words may be slow or clumsy, but his sincerity cuts through like the sharpest blade, and his grandma knows this. No more is Chunhe the helpless little boy he once was; now, he stands tall against the prejudice that the world throws at him.
Even after knowing how it ends, it doesn't get easier the second time around.
She holds you to her chest, letting you sob your little heart out for what feels like forever. For every tear that falls, Kazuha is there with a brush of her thumb or a comforting kiss to pick up all the broken pieces that the movie left you in.
It feels unfair, undeserved, you think, to know such tenderness like it's home. In the original script, the roles would be reversed—Kazuha sobbing into your arms while you comfort her.
But they aren't. And even in this tenderness that you cherish so deeply, inklings of insecurities that you've long held still manage to seep through.
"Can I ask you something?" you say, wiping away at the last of your tears.
"What is it, baby?"
You breathe, slowly. "Why do you… why do you like me?"
She leans into you, the soft weight of her cheek resting on your head. "Hmm… Well, other guys just suck," Kazuha answers simply.
"Don't you ever wish I was more, uh, 'manlier' or something?"
"Hell no," she grimaces. "Those kinds of guys are the worst. I say one funny thing and they're all like 'Damn, your energy is different, for real!' and it's so annoying! I just have a personality!"
Kazuha holds you tighter, and it becomes clear just how much she wants you over any other guy. "Besides, I like my boys on the softer side." She kisses your damp cheek. "It means they have a soul."
The two of you share a chuckle, holding each other underneath the covers until the fatigue of today catches up to both of you. Your insecurities quelled, body warm, and heart undeniably owned by this miracle of a woman; for the first time in your quiet and unassuming existence, you feel like you're right where you belong—wrapped up in Kazuha's arms.
(Author's Note: Thanks to @azelfty and @erospandemos for beta <3)
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For most, Friday nights meant partying. Bad decisions that'll wash over by Monday. Breaking off the shackles of humanity to get more wasted than humanly possibly. For Eunchae and Kyujin, Friday nights are for breaking out their favorite fluffy blanket—the one with the big wolf on it—and snuggling up on Eunchae's balcony underneath an audience of stars. Every Friday without fail, exactly in their assigned spots: Kyujin, the big spoon, and Eunchae, the little one.
Kyujin snuggles closer, nose pressed against the neck of her lover. "Did you get a new perfume?" Her soft voice sends tingles down Eunchae's spine.
"Nah," she responds. "I did get a new shampoo though. The grocery story ran out of what I usually get."
Kyujin takes another whiff. "It's nice. Strawberry?"
Eunchae nods, her brown hair tickling Kyujin's cheek. Another deep inhale, and all of a sudden, strawberries are all Kyujin can think about. Strawberry smoothies, bagels smothered with cream cheese and strawberry jam, those healthy cereals her mother buy with all those dried strawberry pieces. She couldn't get enough of it.
"Do you like it that much?" Eunchae giggles. "I'll buy it for you next time I go grocery shopping."
"No, no, it's just—"She sniffs right on her scalp"—it's just nice. I can't explain it."
"What shampoo do you use?" Eunchae shifts in her arms, and all of a sudden finds herself counting each individual eyelash lining the top of her cat-like eyes (She got to 10 before losing count).
"I don't know," Kyujin whispers into the narrowing space,"it changes every few weeks."
"It's nice," she guesses. It's hard to focus when her eyes are on those soft lips. Every week, Eunchae makes an effort to try and memorize each crease on them. Long, short, short, that one's a bit longer than the first, and she loses track all over again as the thumping in her ears persists. With legs tangled and arms enclosed, the interior of their shared wolf blanket feels like a sauna, both girls trying to outlast the other in the growing heat.
"My tummy feels funny," Eunchae admits. In response, Kyujin runs her hand underneath her shirt like it's a physical issue she can solve, feeling the way Eunchae tenses under her palm.
"Feels fine to me."
"You're stupid," she says, but her face is all smiles as Kyujin goes higher, higher, dragging against the gentle divots of her abs, and stopping at the hem of her sports bra. "Can't even figure out what shampoo to buy."
"What's wrong with a little exploration?" She teases her nail along the elastic, snapping it gently against Eunchae's skin.
"Nothing, really." Eunchae shifts closer, pulling Kyujin's thigh to her waist. "Are we still talking about shampoo?"
"A subject change would be nice." A soft press against her lips later and strawberries are on Kyujin's mind again. "Strawberry lip gloss?"
"That was a coincidence," Eunchae chuckles. "Do you like it?"
"Hmm, I should try it again just to be sure."
The air fills with the pucker of sticky lips and hushed giggles. Kyujin pulls close, and Eunchae lets her, lost in the headiness of being touched in ways only she would know. Beyond this balcony is nothing; irrelevant. Everything they need is right here, underneath the blanket with the wolf on it.
Eunchae whines. "You're gonna make me wake the neighbors again."
Kyujin has her chest pressed against her lover's back, hand trailing down to the waistband of her sweats. "Don't blame me because you can't keep your mouth shut."
"I'm the one that has to deal with them when you leave." Despite her protests, Eunchae spreads her legs, craving sweet release after such a long week. Another whimper escapes her lips as Kyujin invades her most intimate area with her delicate fingers.
She knows exactly what makes Eunchae tick: the sensitivity of her nipples, the speed she likes to be fucked silly, down to the crescendo of her moans as she approaches her climax. Kyujin gets drunk on the scent of strawberries, hands moving with a mind of their own on the body she's loved a thousand times before. All Eunchae can do is submit to the constant stream of dopamine.
"Shit, fuck," she slurs, vocabulary dumbed down to the essentials. She presses back into Kyujin, desperate to be touched, to be loved, to be fucked by her expert fingers. "God, you're so good…"
"I know," Kyujin smirks. If nothing, she takes immense pride in being able to see her like this—like putty in her hands, undone in all the best ways.
Eunchae turns her head. "Kiss me, please, I—" Her lips are claimed in an instant, moans suffocated by Kyujin's tongue. Against the whistling winds, all that can be heard is the hot stickiness of Eunchae's cunt, barely muffled by the blanket. The melody of their lovemaking is a secret only meant for them; whatever the neighbors argue is up for speculation.
Kyujin slows her pumping, down to occasional swipes against her lover's sweet spot. "I'm fucking starving for you," she huffs, trailing kisses on her throat, down to her soft breasts, lower still until she's hidden under the blanket.
Before Eunchae can even complain about the loss of Kyujin's fingers, her sweats are pulled to her ankles, and a tongue slides up her soaked thighs.
"Oh fuck, Kyujin," she moans, barely keeping it together. Without a kiss to keep her silent, she cups a hand over her mouth; it's all for naught as a flick of Kyujin's tongue against her clit turns her into a siren. Her poor neighbors.
Eunchae's words dissolve into vague grunts of "fuck", "yes", and "right there", her voice climbing up the register to that note Kyujin likes. She eats up her girlfriend's pretty heat, chasing that sound that lets her know she's done a good job, ready to drink up every last drop of her honey.
And Eunchae is gone; lost in a strawberry-scented bliss; another eventful Friday ends.
while i have ur attention, i wanna let yall know about a pretty sick platform called Fanprose!
I won’t be leaving tumblr completely, but I’ll be a little more active over there in terms of the random bullshit that I spew! I have a few fics on there that are “Fanprose exclusive” (I’m too lazy to bring them over) so come check it out :]
(Author's Note: Written for promp run by @azelfty and @jmuns-kpop! For a much better reading experience, check it out on Fanprose!)
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1/5
maltijoo, 17:34: hello! sorry for the random question lol i was wondering if u could send me the notes for ap chem?
merkury83, 17:36: who is this?
maltijoo, 17:36: oh sorry LOL its jiwoo, i sit behind u in gardener's!!!
merkury83, 17:40: oh okay
merkury83, 17:41: 4 images attached
maltijoo, 17:41: THANK UUUUU ur a lifesaver lol
maltijoo, 17:41: i'll see u in class tomorrow :)
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1/9
maltijoo, 18:01: heyyyyy, sorry to bother u again lol but could u send me the notes for today? i was soooo lost and ur notes are way more organized than mine lol
merkury83, 18:02: sure
merkury83, 18:02: 6 images attached
maltijoo, 18:03: thank u!! again lol
merkury83, 18:05: np
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1/13
maltijoo, 14:37: hey are u still on campus?
maltijoo, 14:38: 1 image attached
maltijoo, 14:38: i found ur student id on the ground!!!
merkury83, 14:53: ah i just got home
maltijoo, 14:56: damn :/
maltijoo, 14:56: i can just give it to u tomorrow during class?
merkury83, 15:01: that's fine
merkury83, 15:01: thanks
maltijoo, 15:03: ofc!!! ill see ya tomorrow :))
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1/17
12:45: maltijoo sent you a post.
maltijoo, 12:45: OOPS sorry i meant to send that to my friend lol
merkury83, 12:48: it's okay
merkury83, 12:48: what show is that?
maltijoo, 12:49: heated rivalry!!! have u seen it??
merkury83, 12:50: no
merkury83, 12:50: what's it about?
maltijoo, 12:52: omg it's about these two hockey players on rival hockey teams that end up falling in love :)
maltijoo, 12:52: u should check it out! i'll warn u, some of the scenes are kinda spicy lol
merkury83, 12:52: i'm not really into hockey
maltijoo, 12:55: me neither lol but the writing is SO good and the chemistry between the main couple is so UGH i love it so much
merkury83, 12:56: maybe i'll check it out
maltijoo, 12:57: u definitely should!!!!
maltijoo, 12:57: let me know how it goes lol
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merkury83, 22:12: i couldn't really get into it
merkury83, 22:12: sorry
maltijoo, 22:14: lol it's okay, i understand if its not everyones cup of tea :)
maltijoo, 22:15: thanks for checking it out anyways, i didn't think u would actually watch it lol
merkury83, 22:18: my mom walked in on me while i was watching and we had a very long and uncomfortable conversation about sexuality
maltijoo, 22:18: OMG im so sorry but that's so funny LMAO
merkury83, 22:19: at least i know my mother isn't a homophobe
merkury83, 22:20: lol
maltijoo, 22:21: LMAO
maltijoo, 22:26: what shows do u usually watch?
merkury83, 22:27: i don't really watch tv
merkury83, 22:27: the last show that i really kept up with was Smiling Friends
maltijoo, 22:32: OMG I LOVE SMILING FRIENDS
merkury83, 22:35: really?
maltijoo, 22:36: YESSSSS its so funny
maltijoo, 22:37: my best friend kyujin thinks it looks ugly so she won't watch it with me lol
merkury83, 22:40: is kyujin the friend you meant to send the post to?
maltijoo, 22:42: yup lol
maltijoo, 22:43: i'm the one that got her into heated rivalry, idk if she would've ended up watching it on her own lol
merkury83, 22:45: everyone has their own tastes, i suppose
maltijoo, 22:45: yeah lol
maltijoo, 22:48: im gonna go to sleep, but thanks for checking out heated rivalry!! even if u didnt end up liking it lol
merkury83, 22:50: np
merkury83, 22:50: goodnight
maltijoo, 22:51: goodnight :)
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1/18
22:43: merkury83 replied to maltijoo's story
merkury83, 22:43: what song is that?
maltijoo, 22:50: twilight zone - ariana grande
merkury83, 22:53: thanks
maltijoo, 22:54: np!!!
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1/21
merkury83, 12:07: hi
maltijoo, 12:09: hi! whats up?
merkury83, 12:10: i wanted to ask if you were okay
merkury83, 12:10: mr. gardener was giving you a hard time this morning
maltijoo, 12:12: im okay!! i mean it sucks but ill live :/
maltijoo, 12:13: thanks for asking tho :,)
merkury83, 12:14: okay
merkury83, 12:18: do you wanna talk about it?
maltijoo, 12:20: nahhhh theres really nothing to talk about eneewayzuh :p he was just being a dick, thats all
maltijoo, 12:21: i do appreciate ur concern tho, its very sweet <3
merkury83, 12:25: np
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1/26
17:02: maltijoo sent a post
maltijoo, 17:02: LMAOOO
merkury83, 17:33: lol
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1/30
merkury83, 13:35: i didn't see you in class today, are you okay?
maltijoo, 13:39: awww did u miss me? ;)
maltijoo, 13:40: lol jk
maltijoo, 13:40: i got food poisoning :/
merkury83, 13:41: that sucks
merkury83, 13:41: how are you feeling now?
maltijoo, 13:41: lowkey dying but i think ill live lol
merkury83, 13:41: did u eat something bad?
maltijoo, 13:42: idk, kyujin and i got tacos last night but shes still fine so
maltijoo, 13:42: maybe im just unlucky :,)
merkury83, 13:44: 5 images attached
merkury 83, 13:44: here are today's notes if you need them
merkury83, 13:44: and mr. gardener mentioned that we have a quiz next week
maltijoo, 13:44: OMG thank u so much!!!
maltijoo, 13:44: u really are a lifesaver lol :)
merkury83, 13:45: np
merkury83, 13:45: i gotta go to class, i'll talk to you later
merkury83, 13:46: get well soon
maltijoo, 13:46: thanks!! lol
maltijoo, 13:46: ttyl :)
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2/1
15:35: maltijoo sent you a post.
maltijoo, 15:35: LMAO
15:40: maltijoo sent you a post.
15:43: maltijoo sent you a post.
maltijoo, 15:44: omg this sea otter is so cute im crying :,)))
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merkury83, 20:03: sorry, fell asleep
maltijoo, 20:06: it's okay!!! lol
maltijoo, 20:07: how was ur nap? :)
merkury83, 20:10: okay ig
merkury83, 20:11: my head kinda hurts
maltijoo, 20:12: oh no that sucks :(
maltijoo, 20:13: maybe just drink some water or take an ibuprofen if its bad!!
merkury83, 20:15: sure
maltijoo, 20:23: 2 images attached
maltijoo, 20:24: OOPS SORRY those were meant for kyujin omg
maltijoo, 20:24: i bought this new jacket and i wanted to show her lol
merkury83, 20:27: it's okay
merkury83, 20:28: it looks nice
maltijoo, 20:28: thanks :)
maltijoo, 20:29: i got it on sale too!!! 40% off!!!!
merkury83, 20:33: nice
maltijoo, 20:34: lol
maltijoo, 20:41: how was ur day?
merkury83, 20:41: fine
merkury83, 20:42: hbu
maltijoo, 20:45: it was okay, just went shopping with my mom after school lol
merkury83, 20:47: that's nice
maltijoo, 20:48: yeah lol
maltijoo, 20:53: sorry if im boring u :p
merkury83, 20:53: you're not
merkury83, 20:53: sorry
merkury83, 20:54: just tired
maltijoo, 20:56: didnt u just wake up tho?
merkury83, 20:59: yeah
merkury83, 21:00: i just always feel tired ig
maltijoo, 21:02: aw :(
maltijoo, 21:02: have u tried coffee?
maltijoo, 20:03: not now obvi lol
maltijoo, 20:04: i can grab u a coffee tomorrow morning if u want!! kyujin and i always get coffee together before class
merkury83, 21:07: it's okay, u don't have to do that for me
maltijoo, 21:09: no i insist!!! its the least i can do since u always give me ur notes lol
merkury83, 21:13: okay
merkury83, 21:13: thank you
maltijoo, 21:14: np!!! :)
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2/2
maltijoo, 7:45: 1 image attached
maltijoo, 7:45: coffee delivery!!! lol
maltijoo, 7:45: meet me at the front gate :)
merkury83, 7:48: okay
merkury83, 7:49: omw there
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2/6
maltijoo, 12:31: yo
maltijoo, 12:31: 1 image attached
maltijoo, 12:31: i can see u lol
merkury83, 12:32: lol
maltijoo, 12:32: u should come sit with us!!!
merkury83, 12:32: thanks, but i don't want to disturb you guys
maltijoo, 12:33: omg im literally inviting u lol its okay
merkury83, 12:33: are you sure?
maltijoo, 12:33: yesssss come sit with us come onnnnnnnnn
merkury83, 12:33: okay
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18:49: maltijoo sent a post.
18:51: merkury83 sent a post.
maltijoo, 18:51: LMAOO
18:51: maltijoo liked a post.
merkury83, 18:51: lol
merkury83, 18:54: sorry if i was awkward at lunch today
maltijoo, 18:54: omggg nooo u werent awkward at all!!
maltijoo, 18:55: sorry i shouldve warned u about me and kyujin's energy lol
maltijoo, 18:56: i completely understand if we were way too mcuh lol
maltijoo, 18:56: *much
merkury83, 18:57: you two were fine, i'm just not good at talking in person
maltijoo, 18:57: its okay!!! im not good at talking to people either lol
merkury83, 18:57: u talk to me just fine
maltijoo, 18:57: lol i mean outside of u and kyujin
merkury83, 18:58: but we just met
maltijoo, 19:00: idk u just have a chill aura ig :p
merkury83, 19:01: is that a good thing?
maltijoo, 19:01: yeah lol
maltijoo, 19:01: ur just easy to talk to!!!
maltijoo, 19:01: or maybe i just yap too much lol
merkury83, 19:01: that's okay
merkury83, 19:01: thanks
maltijoo, 19:01: no prob bob B)
2/10
maltijoo, 5:01: good morning!!
merkury83, 5:05: good morning
maltijoo, 5:06: do u wanna meet up before chem to go over the study guide? im not prepared at all for it and its stressing me out ;(
merkury83, 5:09: sure
maltijoo, 5:10: thank u so much!!!!
maltijoo, 5:11: i gotta go get ready lol i'll see u in a bit!!!
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maltijoo, 6:59: im by the front gate, where u atttttttttt
maltijoo, 6:59: my hands are freezinggggg
maltijoo, 7:00: lol nbm i see u
maltijoo, 7:00: *nvm
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2/12
maltijoo, 15:07: 3 images attached
maltijoo, 15:07: OMG kyujin and i found this bunny while walking home!!!!
maltijoo, 15:07: it's so cute im crying :,)
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2/14
maltijoo, 10:57: heyo!
merkury83, 11:15: hey
maltijoo, 11:17: 1 image attached
maltijoo, 11:17: happy valentines day brochacho B)
merkury83, 11:20: lol
merkury83, 11:21: happy valentine's day
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2/17
maltijoo, 19:20: 2 images attached
maltijoo, 15:21: this new boba place just opened up nearby!!
maltijoo, 15:21: it's pretty good, i got an oreo smoothie B)
maltijoo, 15:22: u should come with us next time!!!
maltijoo, 15:22: u seem like a regular milk tea kinda guy lol
maltijoo, 15:23: NOT IN A BAD WAY THO ksdfkjsdanbfk i mean like u would probably like something simple and classic
maltijoo, 15:25: idk sorry lol i think all this sugar is wrecking my brain :p
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16:41: maltijoo sent a post
16:59: maltijoo sent a post
maltijoo, 16:59: omg i thought this was mr gardener at first LMAO
17:02: maltijoo sent a post
17:05: maltijoo sent a post
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merkury83, 19:33: sorry, i was busy
merkury83, 19:36: i prefer mango smoothies over regular milk tea
maltijoo, 19:37: u dont need to apologize at all!!! sorry for blowing up ur phone earlier lol
maltijoo, 19:39: i was actually stuck between getting oreo or mango today lol
maltijoo, 19:42: do u have any plans this weekend? we should go if ur not too busy!!!!
merkury83, 19:50: sure
maltijoo, 19:52: are u sure lol
maltijoo, 19:54: u dont seem too excited about it and id hate to force u to do something u dont want to :/
merkury83, 19:56: no, i want to go
merkury83, 19:56: my head is just hurting, sorry
maltijoo, 19:59: oh im sorry :(
maltijoo, 20:00: maybe u should eat a snack and drink some water
maltijoo, 20:01: sometimes ill be so busy with something that i forgot to eat all day and i end up feeling like garbage later lol
merkury83, 20:02: i'll try to find something to eat
maltijoo, 20:02: do u get headaches normally?
maltijoo, 20:03: maybe u should see a doctor or something
maltijoo, 20:38: which one is ur house? asking for a friend :))))
merkury83, 20:39: what???
maltijoo, 20:39: HURRY im freezing lol
maltijoo, 20:40: i brought snacks!!!
merkury83, 20:42: what
merkury83, 20:42: hold on
merkury83, 20:43: i'll be out in a sec
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2/21
merkury83, 13:21: where are you?
maltijoo, 13:22: SORRY im like 5 min away!!!
maltijoo, 13:22: i couldnt find my jacket when i was getting ready earlier :(((
merkury83, 13:22: it's okay
merkury83, 13:22: i'm just waiting inside
maltijoo, 13:23: ill be there soon!!! sorryyyyyyy
merkury83, 13:25: it's okay, really
merkury83, 13:25: i'll see you in a bit
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maltijoo, 17:38: how much do i owe u for the drink? i forgor :p
merkury83, 17:40: don't worry about it
maltijoo, 17:42: noooo i insist!!! my drink was so expensive :,)
merkury83, 17:45: i don't mind
merkury83, 17:45: it wasn't that much
maltijoo, 17:46: are u sure?
merkury83, 17:48: i'm sure
maltijoo, 17:50: thanks :,) ur very sweet lol
merkury83, 17:51: np
maltijoo, 17:54: i had a lot of fun today!!! lol
merkury83, 17:56: me too
merkury83, 17:56: i don't really go out too much
merkury83, 17:57: it was really nice, being with u
maltijoo, 18:00: awwww wtf thats so sweet <3
maltijoo, 18:02: we should def hang out more often!! even if its just to study or something lol
maltijoo, 18:02: i could use the extra help with chem :,)
merkury83, 18:03: i would like that
maltijoo, 18:05: YEAHHHHH!!!!!!
maltijoo,18:07: 1 image attached
merkury83, 18:09: lol
merkury83, 18:10: thank you again for inviting me out today
maltijoo, 18:12: ofc!!! :)))
maltijoo, 18:13: thank u for the drink!!! i got u next time lol
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2/25
maltijoo, 7:01: good morning!!!
maltijoo, 7:01: 1 image attached
maltijoo, 7:02: kyujin and i are by the front gate!!
merkury83, 7:03: on my way
merkury83, 7:04: did you do something different with your hair?
maltijoo, 7:05: i got a haircut yesterday ehe
maltijoo, 7:07: what do u think? :p
merkury83, 7:10: it's pretty
maltijoo, 7:10: thanks <3
maltijoo, 7:14: kyujin says to hurry up lol
merkury83, 7:15: i'll be there soon
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16:01: maltijoo sent a post
maltijoo, 16:02: aw damn theyre cancelling smiling friends :(((((
merkury83, 16:04: aw that sucks
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2/27
maltijoo, 17:27: buh
merkury83, 17:28: ?
maltijoo, 17:30: ehe hai :)
merkury83, 17:31: what's up?
maltijoo, 17:32: just working on a study guide for math
maltijoo, 17:33: u wouldnt have ms petersen perchance? :p
merkury83, 17:35: i do not
maltijoo, 17:36: damn </3
merkury83, 17:40: do you need help?
maltijoo, 17:42: nahhh i think i got it
maltijoo, 17:44: i just want u to keep me company :)
merkury, 17:46: okay
maltijoo, 17:52: damn bruh what happened to keeping me company ;(
merkury83, 17:58: 1 image attached
merkury83, 17:59: this is your house, right?
merkury83, 17:59: asking for a friend
maltijoo, 18:01: omg ur kidding
merkury83, 18:02: 1 image attached
merkury83, 18:02: i brought snacks
maltijoo, 18:03: wtf ur the sweetest <333
maltijoo, 18:04: ill be down in a sec!!!
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maltijoo, 20:12: thanks again for stopping by :)))
merkury83, 20:15: np
merkury83, 20:16: i'm just happy i could be useful
maltijoo, 20:21: <333
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3/1
13:41: maltijoo sent a post
13:45: maltijoo sent a post
maltijoo, 13:45: AWWWHFJHAKJNAFL
merkury83, 13:48: cute
13:52: merkury83 sent a post
maltijoo, 13:54: LMAOOO
13:59: maltijoo sent a post
14:02: merkury83 sent a post
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3/5
maltijoo, 7:50: ayo are u okay? i dont see u in class
merkury83, 8:12: i'm at home, i don't feel good
maltijoo, 8:15: awww :(((
maltijoo, 8:17: want me to sneak out of class and grab u some meds or something? lol
maltijoo, 8:18: cuz ill do it!!! NO hesitation >:)
merkury83, 8:20: no its okay
merkury83, 8:21: i just need some space
maltijoo, 8:30: just let me know if u need anything okay?
merkury83, 8:32: i will
merkury83, 8:32: thanks
maltijoo, 8:33: get well soon!!
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3/7
17:40: maltijoo sent a post
17:49: maltijoo sent a post
maltijoo, 17:49: OH.
18:01: maltijoo sent a post
18:31: maltijoo sent a post
maltijoo, 18:31: #needthat
maltijoo, 18:32: OHDOFOADNBFJ sorry i meant to send that to kyujin omgkjdasnvjlsns
18:45: maltijoo sent a post
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3/9
merkury83, 2:06: sorry for the late reply
maltijoo, 2:08: its ok!!! is everything alright?
mekury83, 2:11: idk
merkury83, 2:11: i just can't seem to get out of bed
maltijoo, 2:12: why, whats wrong?
merkury83, 2:16: probably just an off day
merkury83, 2:16: i'll be fine
merkury83, 2:17: sorry for texting you so late
maltijoo, 2:18: u dont need to apologize at all, im always here if u need me
maltijoo, 2:19: besides, i can sleep better if i know ur alright :)
merkury83, 2:21: thanks jiwoo
merkury84, 2:22: goodnight
maltijoo, 2:25: goodnight and i hope u feel better soon <3
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3/13
15:29: maltijoo sent a post
15:43: maltijoo sent a post
16:02: merkury83 sent a post
maltijoo, 16:05: omgggg that looks so good, we should try it next weekend? if ur free ofc :)
merkury83, 16:11: maybe
16:29: maltijoo sent a post
17:13: maltijoo sent a post
17:44: maltijoo sent a post
maltijoo, 17:44: lmao
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3/17
maltijoo, 15:29: hey is everything alright?
maltijoo, 15:31: u sat in the back again in gardeners, i didn't get a chance to talk to u at all today
maltijoo, 15:31: i didnt see u at lunch either :(
maltijoo, 15:33: i know ur going through something rn and i wanna give u space like u asked but it scares me when idk whats going on with u:((
maltijoo, 15:36: just text me when u can, okay? pls
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3/22
2:06: maltijoo sent a post
2:14: maltijoo sent a post
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3/25
23:21: merkury83 sent a post
maltijoo, 23:21: hey! how are u?
merkury83, 23:26: i'm okay
merkury83, 23:27: hbu?
maltijoo, 23:28: honestly ive been worried about u like crazy
maltijoo, 23:30: u dont text, u avoid me like the plague, and i have no idea why. did i do something wrong?
merkury83, 23:37: no it's not you
merkury83, 23:37: i'm sorry, jiwoo
merkury83, 23:43: sometimes i just get in these moods where i shut down. i can barely get out of bed in the morning and even the simplest tasks feel impossibly heavy. i know i should've said something to you sooner. again, i'm so sorry
maltijoo, 23:48: its fine, just give me a heads up next time ok? ik im not ur mom or whatever, but i still care about u and i want u to be okay
merkury83, 23:50: okay, i will
maltijoo, 23:51: thanks
maltijoo, 23:55: did anything happen that triggered this? if u dont mind me asking
merkury83, 23:58: nothing specific
merkury83, 23:59: this is just how i am
3/26
maltijoo, 00:01: aww im sorry :((
maltijoo, 00:03: if ur up for it, maybe we can go watch a movie or something soon? im pretty busy this weekend, but im free next weekend
merkury83, 00:06: sure
merkury83, 00:07: i would like that
maltijoo, 00:07: great!! im pretty tired, but if u need anything, just text me, ok? and it doesnt matter what time it is or if im busy or sleeping or whatever, u can text me. ur not a burden or anything like that, ur my friend and i care about u
merkury83, 00:10: i will
merkury83, 00:11: thank you for everything, jiwoo
maltijoo, 00:12: anytime :)))
maltijoo, 00:12: goodnight <3
merkury83, 00:14: goodnight
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3/29
22:12: merkury83 sent a post
maltijoo, 22:14: omggg why are they so mean to pim :,(((
merkury83, 22:15: lol
22:25: maltijoo sent a post
22:47: maltijoo sent a post
23:04: merkury83 sent a post
maltijoo, 23:06: WAIT this song eats omggg
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4/1
maltijoo, 16:48: AH i forgot to return ur chem notebook!!! sorry ;(
merkury83, 16:50: it's okay
maltijoo, 16:51: ill return it tomorrow!!
maltijoo, 16:54: or maybe i can stop by ur house and drop it off :)))
merkury83, 16:59: now isn't really a good time
merkury83, 17:00: sorry
maltijoo, 17:01: oh thats okay! youll just have to spend the night without it ig :p
merkury83, 17:03: u can keep it
maltijoo, 17:04: lolll thanks for the thoughtful gift
maltijoo, 17:05: i dont need ur notes that badly, just come get it tomorrow
merkury83, 17:08: ok ill see u tomorww then
maltijoo, 17:09: is everything alright?
merkury83, 17:10: justbusy sorry
maltijoo, 17:12: okkkk ill see u tomorrow then
maltijoo, 17:15: if u need anything just let me know, ok?
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4/2
maltijoo, 7:10: ayooooooo im by the front gate
maltijoo, 7:11: 1 image attached
maltijoo, 7:12: the weather is so nice today :)))
maltijoo, 7:12: i saw this patch of flowers already blooming!!! i forgot to take a pic tho :/
maltijoo, 7:22: hellooooooooo
maltijoo, 7:23: did u oversleep or something? lol
maltijoo, 7:28: i have to get to class, just text me if u need anything, ok?
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4/3
maltijoo, 9:05: hey are u ok??
maltijoo, 9:05: there's a rumor going around, idk who started it but its really fucked up
maltijoo, 9:07: hello??
maltijoo, 9:10: this better be some sick joke
maltijoo, 9:17: im coming over idc
maltijoo, 9:18: pls text me back
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4/4
maltijoo, 00:38: im so sorry. i shouldve went to ur house that night to drop off ur chem notebook. i knew in my gut that something was off but i didnt want to pry. u would still be here if i had just done something. im so so so fucking sorry.
maltijoo, 00:43: things were back to normal just a few days ago. i thought they were. why couldnt u have just talked to me? i wouldve listened, i wouldve done everything i can do to just to make ur okay. i love u. i wish i couldve told u that in person but i was too fucking scared
maltijoo, 00:49: we were supposed to go to the movies this weekend
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4/6
maltijoo, 14:48: we had an assembly this morning. idk how but i managed to get through it without sobbing. ig this means that its real then. ur actually gone
maltijoo, 14:52: it still feels like ur here. whenever i close my eyes, all i see is u. the u that i see in my mind isnt looking straight at me tho. its always to the side, like theyre hiding something from me. i wish u didnt have to hide so much
maltijoo, 14:53: i miss u so much
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4/15
maltijoo, 13:15: 3 images attached
maltijoo, 13:17: i went to the park today. ive been going on walks a lot more lately just to clear my head. the guidance counselor recommended it. i think shes being overworked these days
maltijoo, 13:20: deep down, i feel so angry. the weather is nice, the flowers are blooming, but i cant enjoy any of it without u. its so unfair. why should the flowers bloom when ur not here to witness them?
maltijoo, 13:25: i think im gonna take a nap. idk why i type these things as if u can read them. id like to think that u are, somewhere
maltijoo, 13:26: goodnight. i love u
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5/1
maltijoo, 4:10: hi
maltijoo, 4:15: ik its been a while. school has been hectic lately, but that doesnt mean ive stopped thinking about u. ur always on my mind in some way, shape, or form
maltijoo, 4:18: i had a dream about u and then i woke up suddenly. maybe ur trying to send me message. it was a nice dream. we were spread out on an endless field of grass with a perfect blue sky hanging above us. i couldnt see u, but i could feel the warmth of ur hand in mine and i knew instantly that it was u. we didnt talk much, but we didnt have to. it felt so real
maltijoo, 4:19: god im about to cry again lol i managed to make it a couple weeks without crying, but here u are, trying to break my streak
maltijoo, 4:23: idk if i ever told u how happy i was with u. u did so much for me even when u were struggling by urself. id give anything just to hear ur voice again. even just a simple reply from u would be nice
maltijoo, 4:25: i dont think ill ever get over u, but maybe thats not such a bad thing. even if ur not around physically anymore, just knowing that i was lucky to meet u fills me with so much joy. ill always cherish the time we had together
maltijoo, 4:31: i gotta get ready for school soon. ill talk to u later, ok? i love u <3
Member of the community put this new fanfic site together! Had the pleasure of beta-testing it.
In addition to being a much better site for reading and writing stories than tumblr, you can also earn photocards of your favourite idols!
So come check it out! Me and a bunch of your favourite k-smut writers will be cross-posting to here from now on.
See you soon for another installment in Real Bad Business, and as always, have a Minjeong.
has your own works been referenced by other writer/authors in their stories? likewise, which authors/stories have you referenced in your own work?
hello zeke!
I haven’t had anything directly referenced, but a few writers in the past have said that Unlikely Duet has inspired their own stories, which I’m always flattered to hear :] I’ve also been a crusty eyed white dog in a few of @okaylikeschaewon’s fics, if that counts 🐶
Idk if I’ve ever intentionally referenced anyone else’s work in my own stuff. I’ve definitely used “definitely” and “maybe” in close succession before tho :>
Hello. I'm looking for a Karina x male reader fic that I haven't been able to find for a while. I thought it might be on your other account. Last updated on Sep 9.
It had, I think, a cheerleader Karina that's outgoing and lives modestly (I wouldn't say she's poor here). And then there's Winter, she's called Minjeong here, and she's the opposite of Karina. Quiet and rich and knows how to draw but her parents don't like it. I really liked it and was the reason that I finally decided to make a tumblr account. I think it's called Gym Secrets or maybe that's just me naming it by the lemon in the gym to remember it by.
Thanks!
Hello anon!
Unfortunately, I've never written Karina so this one isn't mine :> I've asked around and no one else seems to recognize this one, but if anyone else knows this fic, feel free to leave it in the comments!
You’ve come to terms with the fact that you’re a “nerd” ages ago. Studying isn’t something you necessarily enjoy, but it’s a requirement for securing your spot in the real world, where meaningless titles like “nerd” or “jock” hold no substance on one’s success and only those who truly work hard will stand the test of time. With finals inching ever closer, it’s vital to you that you don’t waste a single second—
“What’s up, nerd?”
A light smack to the back of your head tears you out of the flow state you were in while brushing up on previous study guides from the past year. There’s only one person you know that’s dimwitted enough to still throw out outdated insults like that, almost as if she’s a caricature of a high school bully from those 2010’s movies she claims to hate.
“Bae,” you grumble, “Why are you even here? I thought you said you were ‘allergic to the library’?”
She shrugs, plopping down into the empty seat next to you. “I got bored.”
“Okay.” You turn your attention back to the worksheets in front of you, trying to remember where you left off. “Not my problem.”
“C’mon, man,” she groans. “Let’s do something fun.”
There aren’t many things that threaten the future of your success; most issues can be waved away with a quick favor or a helpful push in the right direction. In fact, you already have the rest of your life meticulously planned out in a journal, complete with potential contingencies and multiple backups in case any problems may arise.
Enter: Bae Jinsol. The physical embodiment of everything that could and will stand in your way. You tutored her once two semesters ago, and you’ve regretted it ever since. Not quite a leech—you’re not that cruel—but her unyielding persistence alone is enough to make it so that giving her what she wants is the only viable solution you have. More often than not, this means hours of time wasted that could be spent towards perfecting your mind to the best it can be.
“I’m really busy right now.”
“What could you possibly need to study for, you’re, like, the smartest person I know.”
You raise an eyebrow at her. “Knowing you, that doesn’t mean much—Ow.”
Bae slaps your arm, her lip jutting out in a pout. “That’s mean.”
You can’t help but grin at her expression. “You’re right, that was mean. I apologize,” you say, making an effort to sound sincere. “Now, I have a lot of work to do, so unless you’re okay with sitting there quietly, I suggest that you go and hang out with your other friends.”
She rests her head against the table, turning to watch you with her endearingly round eyes. “I chose to come here. I’ll stick to my decision like a real man.”
“Whatever,” you chuckle before turning back to the study guide.
It’s a bit difficult trying to study with an audience, but not a scenario you’re unfamiliar with. On the rare occasion that Bae doesn’t consistently bug you with her antics, you find her presence quite comfortable. Sometimes she’ll even ask about what you’re working on and entertain your little rants about discoveries you’ve made or thoughts you’ve been having, asking questions if she doesn’t get something. Her motivation to study is nonexistent, but her desire to understand is glaring.
Although, with nothing to talk about today, she gives you a good five minutes before breaking the silence.
“I’m bored again,” she sighs. “Let’s get boba.”
“What happened to sticking to your decision ‘like a real man’?” you tease.
“I’m a woman, jackass.” She leans into you, obscuring your view of the study guide with her face. “And this woman wants boba.”
The world around you freezes as the scent of her perfume lingers past your nose, igniting memories of warmth and coziness. The first crack in a wall that you worked too hard to maintain.
“Why don’t you ask Haewon to go with you instead?” you suggest, trying and failing to avert your gaze from those perfect irises, like swimming pools of deep obsidian.
“Because…” A light blush grows on her cheeks. “...I wanna get boba with you.”
The crack in the wall splinters and grows, exposing the weaknesses that you didn’t know were there. Or perhaps, you did know and chose to ignore them anyways, spackling over them with cheap excuses.
You scoff at her, a meager attempt to save face. “You just want me to pay for you. Again.”
“I told you I’ll pay you back!” she exclaims, earning a couple harsh shushes from nearby students. “I’m just a little strapped for cash at the moment.”
“Why don’t you try, I don’t know, actually looking for a job?” Your gaze moves back to your papers, desperately trying to escape this stalemate. “If you’ll excuse me, I have some work to do.”
Bae clings to the sleeves of her sweater, pouting at you. “Please~?”
Despite her persistence, you dare not move an inch, worried that one small movement could be the final crack that topples the wall. Your eyes reread the same line over and over again, hoping each pass will eventually take, but your mind is too cluttered to properly focus. With the gentle tug of her fingers and the notes of vanilla bean gliding past your nostrils, it’s a wonder how you haven’t succumbed to her demands already.
With a huff of her breath, Bae takes your hand in hers, using her final trump card.
“Baby~”
You want to think that, at that moment, the wall came crashing down in a ceremonious fashion, leaving behind a pile of rubble in its wake, a monument to all the effort you put into your future. But the truth is, she tore down that wall months ago—in fact, you can pinpoint the exact moment of its destruction.
The second you came face to face with her confused expression in that pre-calc class is the moment that sealed your fate, completely changing your perception of what the future could be like for you. That journal you keep, detailing every single miniscule detail of your potential career? You barely got two pages in before turning it into a scrapbook, filling every inch of paper with words, pictures, and keepsakes that remind you of the girl that refuses to give you a moment of peace.
And maybe that’s a good thing. The world could end tomorrow, rendering all of your plans useless. Why spend your last moments with your nose in a study guide when you could be drinking boba with your girlfriend?
“...You’re the worst, you know that?” you utter, interlacing your fingers with hers. Bae flashes you that wide, toothy smile that you can’t get enough of.
“Wow, you’re actually so obsessed with me, that’s insane,” she teases. “Just a single word and you immediately folded like an omelet.”
You haphazardly throw your belongings into your bag, eager to get out of the library and spend time with her. “I’m not obsessed, stupid,” you say,” I’m in love with you.”
“God, you’re so corny.” Despite her deflection, the blush growing on her face betrays her true feelings. She nervously scans the rest of the room before planting a sneaky kiss on your cheek, warm yet fleeting. “I love you too, stupid.”
It’s a fool’s errand to try and predict the future. No matter how smart you are, how many books you read, how many plans you make, the only thing you can do is hope for the future that you desire. And right now, the only future you want is one just like the present, with you clinging onto Bae’s hand with no intention of letting go.
(Author's Note: Moodboard courtesy of @mintwithchoco and Wooly (the artist formerly known as woolypoison)! I saw the cross and went sideways :>)
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It was winter when your girlfriend broke up with you.
Five years, down the drain in a quick "I can't do this anymore." Five words more painful that a knife to the chest.
You thought you'd be able to get over here quickly—you had friends, family, a whole support system for you to rely on while you tried to pick up the pieces of your shattered life.
But what good is a support system? You just want her.
You're drunk again for the umpteenth time this week. Your feet drag against the concrete with each step as if your body is using the last of its energy to push you forward. Your phone buzzes violently your pocket—no doubt calls and texts from your friends asking where you are at this ungodly hour—but unless one of those notifications is from her, you ignore them.
Snow drifts from the midnight sky, each tiny flake seeping into your skin and chilling your bones. You should've dressed warmer, especially on a night like this. Hell, you should've done a lot of things. Should've loved her better. Should've listened to her more. Should've been more attentive. Should've this, should've that. The list of your regrets goes on and on in biblical proportions.
You keep walking. Concrete sidewalks give way to mushy patches of grass, and the frequency of streetlights becomes less and less the further you go. The familiarity of the town you grew up in is gone, replaced by the gnarled silhouettes of bare trees. In spite of the cold, your body doesn't shiver anymore. It can't. All that's left of your energy is used to push you forward through the growing pile of snow.
You only stop when the path ahead ends abruptly. When nothing but open air is there catch your next step. A blanket of white clouds your vision until it's all that exists. No trees, no stones, no shadows, just pure white in every direction. In your drunken haze, you half-expect her to appear out of the white, to hold you against her chest and tell you that this was all just a test, which you passed with flying colors. You'd rest your chin against the hollow of her palm like you used to and she'd take you home and caress your neck until this nightmare disappeared forever.
You shut your eyes. You wait. And wait. And wait. Her touch never comes.
It's too late to go back. You can't even tell where back is. Back to your apartment, stained in the memories of waking up together? Back to the bar, where you'll inevitably lose yourself at the bottom of another bottle? There is nowhere for you. There is nothing after her.
Your back hits the frozen ground as the last beats of your heart slowly decay into a dying rhythm. The snowstorm picks up, burying you with it. Your body, the one she had touched, loved, and broken, isn't your own anymore. If you looked into a mirror, you'd think it was a stranger. A sad, lonely, drunken stranger. And that's exactly how you're going out.
It's comforting, in a strange way—no more late nights letting your regrets rock you to sleep. No more crying over what could have been. No more staring at the empty spot where she used to read or growing sick at the scent of cherries. No more of anything,
That's what death is, right? Just complete and utter nothingness.
As the cold envelops your body, that's all you can think about—nothing. You embrace that nothing with open arms.
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After the nothingness swallowed you whole, you never imagined waking up again.
The first thing you notice is the temperature. It's still cold, but after being buried under the snow, anything less feels like a sauna.
Every muscle in your body aches as you sit up, letting you know that, despite everything, you're alive. Shit. Death was always a fickle thing. Maybe you could've jumped instead of simply laying down to die, but there was no guarantee there either.
The endless white that once surrounded is gone, replaced by the soulless grays of concrete walls and the rotting browns of cracked wooden floors. Harsh winds seeped through the cracks of the arched windows lining the walls. Wooden pews strewn about, brittle, forgotten. Nature had already claimed more than half of them, with some being nothing more than piles of decaying wood.
Behind you sits a large cross on top an elevated stage. Even as everything falls apart around it, the cross stays untouched. How poetic, you think. You were never particularly religious, but perhaps your survival would be a sign for change.
"You're awake."
Your gaze shoots to the center of the room where the voice came from. Where nothing once stood, now was someone. The first thing you noticed was her skin—pale and colorless, like the snow that raged on outside. Her hair, like raven's feathers, as was her dress, something simple yet elegant.
"Who are you?" you manage to croak out. You instinctively clutch your throat. Every word feels like sandpaper against your larynx.
She doesn't answer, just continues to stare with those pitch black eyes. There was no warmth in her expression. Or anywhere on her, for that matter. For a second, you wonder if the voice was even hers. Maybe you just imagined it and she was nothing but a statue.
Your quickly proven wrong as she approaches you.
Every logical part of you says you should be afraid—after passing out in a snowstorm, you wake up in this old, abandoned church to this strange and eerie woman—but you aren't. All logic was abandoned the second you stepped into the woods.
She stops and kneels in front of you. A subtle chill emanates from her being.
"Did you mean to come here?"
"Where is here?
"Nowhere." She rises from her spot and approaches the cross, each step echoing throughout the empty church. "It's only temporary. Temporary requires no name."
"Are you… temporary?" you ask.
She doesn't answer.
Her slender fingers drag against the old wood of the cross. Something about her silhouette felt familiarly uncanny, like a stranger you've passed a thousand times without so much as a greeting.
Even in this decrepit place with this strange woman, you could feel no fear. You couldn't feel much of anything, really. Perhaps the cold had numbed your spirit, weakening all sense of preservation. Whether you intended to or not, you came out here to end it all. Whatever the "end" looks like still eludes you.
"You will ask no more questions," she turns to you, "and you will only speak to answer mine. Understood." Her words come out with finality, like there's no space for anything but the answer she expects.
A shiver runs through your skin as she stares at you, unblinking and unemotional. "Fine," you submit.
"Why are you here."
"Because…" Saying it out loud is more trouble than you thought. Because a girl dumped me. What a childish notion. And yet, it's your truth. "…Because there's nothing out there for me. Not anymore."
"And you believe this to be true."
"I… yes."
She doesn't speak for a while, simply pacing slowly across the stage. With each step, you feel the pain your chest continue to grow, the same pain that's been lingering ever since you were tossed aside like trash. Like cancer, it seeped into every fiber of your being, infecting you from the inside until you were nothing but a husk of your former self. Your lungs, your bones, your brain, nothing was yours anymore.
"Why did you do it."
Your gaze falls to the floor. "Do what?" you mutter.
"No questions," she reiterates, eyeing you intensely.
On unsteady legs, you rise to your feet. "I was about to ask her to marry me," you start, the pain in your chest like a knife twisting in your heart. "I had everything planned out. I bought a ring, I booked flights, I invited our friends to be part of it.
Your vision blurs, maybe from the burning pain or the tears, you're not sure. Nonetheless, you continue. "She was everything to me. We promised we'd be in each other's lives forever, but then she… she…"
"She left you." She's in front of you now, crossing all that space in an instant without a single noise. Despite the cloudiness, you could make out the obsidian of her eyes, like infinite blackness that lead to nothing. The woman's pale skin seems almost translucent, but where you would expect veins and irregularities, there was nothing—hauntingly beautiful, like something you were never meant to see.
"She did," you utter sadly. "All the time we spent, all the memories made, they all meant nothing to her. I meant nothing to her."
You feel a gentle hand caress your cheek. Instinctively, you sink into the hollow of her palm, your eyes fluttering shut as the tears continue to fall.
"Are you nothing." she asks.
"I feel like it." The pain in your chest throbs with each beat of your heart. "I'm so… tired."
"It'll be over soon." Her voice, now a low whisper, brushes against your cheeks like an icy breeze.
"We were supposed to be forever. We were supposed to be… forever. We were…"
The woman presses her lips against yours, eating up your words. The pain stops, then shrinks bit by bit. You feel your body growing lighter, surrendering all control. A wave of numbness rises from your toes, your legs, your chest, until all you feel is nothing.
You can't open your eyes, fore you have none. You can't cry, fore you have no more reason to.
You are, simply, Nothing.
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Only until his presence had properly faded did Haewon open her eyes—another one's suffering was over. The list was shortened by one, only for another dozen to take his place.
She walked off the stage and down the rows of rundown pews, donning her hood as she prepares to venture back out into the cold. There would be no time for mourning; that was not her responsibility to bare. Her duties lie elsewhere.
The harrowing winter storm continues to roar as she steps outside. The slam of the wooden doors echo throughout the empty church, patiently awaiting their next visitor.
Sunghoon's gaze sears right through me and Minji. My skin grows cold. I don't move. Don't breathe. Hell, I can barely think—just moments ago, I was basking in the warmth of Minji's lips, and now I feel like I'm drowning in an endless ocean.
Minji breaks the silence first.
"Sunghoon, I—"
"Don't," he interrupts her. "Don't even think about trying to talk your way out of this one, I saw what you two were doing. Minji, what the hell are you thinking?!" He glares at me with the same look of disdain I've been receiving all night. I'm sick of it. But I can't do anything about it. Not with Minji here. Not after what I promised her.
"I-I was... I just..." Minji squeezes her eyes and lets out a frustrated sigh. "Look, it doesn't matter what we were doing, it's none of your business."
"Actually, it is my business. Your parents told me to look out for you tonight and make sure that he doesn't cause any trouble," he retorts, pacing back and forth. Even after he calls me out, he doesn't dare spare me a single glance—like I'm something filthy, not worth being in his vision.
"He didn't!" Minji argues, her breath growing heavier. "I'm the one that kissed him, alright?! It was me! It's all my fault! So don't point your dirty fingers at him!"
Sunghoon scoffs, like we're some unfathomable impossibility. "How naive can you be?! Do you really think someone like him is right for you?! You're making a mistake, Minji."
"The only mistake I made was thinking you could grow into a decent person!"
The last of her words echoes into the night air. Sunghoon's expression drops, just a smidge, but I can see it. She cut deep. Deeper than I thought she was capable of.
Shards of Sunghoon's broken glass crunch under his feet as he takes a tentative step back. The fire in his eyes is gone, replaced by something I can't quite understand. They're emptier, maybe even sorrowful.
"I'm sure your parents will love to hear about this," he mutters before walking back inside.
Minji and I freeze like statues, lost in thought. My gaze stays fixed to the ground, unable to meet her eye. What the hell can I say anyways? I can barely process my own feelings as it is, and now, I'm left dealing with a whirlwind in my head. How am I supposed to face her? I don't know what will happen now. Everything happened so quickly. What the fuck do I do?
"U-um..." Minji breathes, all the heat gone from her voice. "You should probably go."
My eyes shoot up towards her. "What about you?"
"I-I'll be fine. I think." She takes off my sweater from around her shoulders and hands it back to me. "H-here. You're probably cold."
I am cold. Freezing. But she's the only one that can warm me up. Not some sweater. Her. "Minji..."
She pushes the sweater into my hands, her touch lingering against my skin for a bittersweet moment. "It's okay. I'll be okay," she says, more to herself than me.
Before I can utter another word, she walks back inside, sparing me one more glance before she disappears behind the doors. There's an uncertainty within them. She sounded so confident before, but I can see it in her eyes that it's all just a front. God, I hope she'll be okay.
I sneak out of the building, carefully avoiding everyone from the banquet, and leaving this place of opulence behind. I never should have come. I never should have kissed her. Minji took the fall for me and I'll regret it every day. What was I even thinking? No matter what, something always goes wrong. I should've listened to myself.
I plop down onto the curb and send a text to my dad to come pick me up. The wind howls around me, laughing at my predicament, cruel and mocking. The moon watches from above, a silent witness to everything that just happened tonight. I wish it would tell me what to do. Whatever higher being that exists up there, I wish it would just give me a straight fucking answer—in fact, I wish it would just spare me some mercy and end it already. Quit giving me hope just to throw it down the drain. Fuck.
It's so goddamn cold.
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Minji's POV
The city passes by in soft blurs through the car window, streetlights smearing golden hues across the glass. Stars dot the night sky with their shimmering light, and a full moon trails by our car like a guardian of safe nightly travels. As beautiful as it is, my gaze is fixed on the window, not to enjoy the view, but simply to survive. One wrong look at my parents could be the final crack that breaks the dam.
Tense silence fills the car. Only the hum of the engine and the occasional bump in the road remind me that this is all real. My parents' silhouettes loom in front of me, and I don't dare look or think or even breathe in their general direction. I would be lying if I said I wish they didn't just yell at me and get it over with. The suspense of waiting is always worse than the actual punishment.
The familiar layout of our neighborhood enters my vision and it doesn't take long until we're rolling into our driveway. The car comes to a complete stop, the engine deafens, but none of us move. I clench my teeth to slow my breathing, afraid that one small peep will set them off, but I fear the uneven pounding of my heart can be heard from the front seat.
Mother leaves the car first. I start to unbuckle my seatbelt, but a single, frigid word from my father stops me in my tracks.
"Stop."
I gulp, sitting upright in my seat. Despite my mother's absence, the space inside the car feels impossibly smaller.
"Y-yes, father?" I say.
He sighs, pinching the bridge of his nose. "We trusted you to do the right thing. I let you invite that boy because I thought he was actually taking steps to better himself, but instead, you..." He trails off into a frustrated exhale. My mother's anger, for all its fire, is at the very least predictable—bearable. But my father's anger is something else entirely. Colder. Sharper. He doesn't even have to raise his voice.
"What do you have to say for yourself, Minji?" he utters.
I rack my mind for an answer, debating on defending Yuno or giving him a response that will satisfy him. If they just give Yuno a chance to show them who really is, that he's not at all what he appears to be on the surface, then they'll know that he isn't as bad as they think he is.
But they won't listen. They never do. Not when it matters.
"I... I apologize, father. What I did was a... mistake," I utter. Another lie leaves a bitter taste on my tongue.
"A mistake," he repeats, sending a chill down my spine. "What have I told you before about mistakes?"
"Th-that we..." It's getting harder and harder to breathe properly. "That we learn from them."
"I will make sure you learn from this then. Give me your phone." He glares at me through the rear view mirror while he reaches his hand back towards me. A sense of panic rallies itself within my chest.
"W-wait, I need my phone," I beg, my voice faltering. "I-I need it to coordinate with the other student council members for prom prep, a-and I—"
"You should've thought of that before completely taking advantage of my trust," he shoots back. "Minji. Give it. Now."
With a shaky hand, I retrieve my phone from my purse. My fingers curl around it like it's the last piece of control I have left. Truthfully, prom preparations are the last thing on my mind at the moment. My entire world is contained in this little box. My friends. My life. Yuno. I need to make sure that he's okay. After everything that just happened, I just need to talk to him. To talk about everything. To talk about us.
"Minji," my father all but barks at me. "Phone. Now."
Maybe one day, I'll stop listening. Maybe one day, I'll speak up. But the words never come. I relinquish my phone, my lifeline to the outside world, into his palm. I can only watch helplessly as it disappears into his coat pocket.
"I'm only going to say this once," he continues. "You are not to see that boy ever again. If you have a project with him, switch partners. If he walks the same direction as you, you go the other way. Don't even think about going behind our backs this time because we will know. Do you understand?"
A shaky breath releases itself from my lungs as I fight back a tear. I want to scream, I want to fight back, tell him that he's being unreasonable and controlling. But I can't. I can barely breathe as it is.
"Y-yes, father. I understand," I answer.
"Good," he speaks. "Now go to your room. It's late."
I don't say another word as I get out of the car and head inside. There's no point. He won't listen. He won't change. Neither of them will. The house feels cold and soulless as I shut the front door behind me. The living room is furnished, the fridge full of food, the walls decorated in old family photos, but there's no love in these four walls and there hasn't been for a long time. This place is nothing more than a glorified prison.
Even my room doesn't feel like mine anymore—just another cage for me to sit in. I collapse onto my bed, not bothering to change or get ready to sleep. I just stare at the ceiling fan, watching the blades go around in a circle.
All that energy, just to stay in the same place and serve one purpose. Forever.
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Yuno's POV
I'm fucking exhausted. My mind wouldn't let me sleep—just constantly looping that same scene over and over. I could have let Sunghoon have it. I could have explained to Minji's parents that she did nothing wrong. I could have just stayed. Let them hate me. Blame me. I wouldn't have cared.
But instead, I just... left.. And now I don't know what happened to Minji or why she isn't texting me back.
My dad clears his throat. "Um, aren't you gonna eat? You've barely taken a bite out of your pancakes."
I glance up at the table, my breakfast practically untouched. "I'm... not hungry," I mutter. I'm starving.
"Ah, okay..." he nods. "Is this... Is this about last night?"
I don't answer. What's the point? He can't fix it. Ican't fix it. Nothing will change the fact that I didn't do anything. Minji went through all that trouble to defend me and I didn't do anything.
My dad sighs. "Look, um... I can tell something happened, but I don't want to force you to talk about it if you don't want to. Just know that I'm here for you whenever you're ready, okay?"
"Yeah. Okay," I breathe. My phone buzzes in my pocket. I snatch it out like a reflex—just another message from Yujin. I don't bother reading it this time. I just shove it into my bag, letting it sink to the bottom where I can forget about the damn thing. "I should get going."
"Then, why don't I, uh, put your pancakes in some tupperware and you can have them later if you're hungry?" my dad suggests with a small grin. Truthfully, I don't know if I'll have the appetite later. Or at all. But he's trying, despite everything.
"Yeah. Go ahead," I answer before heading to the front door. He nods from his seat, but I don't look back.
The sun's out. Not a cloud in the sky. Birds overhead. People jogging, laughing, talking to neighbors. It's a perfect day.
And I hate it.
Every step is heavier than the last, like the weight of my emotions are dragging me down into the dirt. I try to keep my head down, shove my hands in my pockets, pretend that everything is okay, but I can't quite shake the constant throbbing in my temples. The pit of dread in my stomach keeps growing bigger and bigger, threatening to swallow me whole if I let it. And maybe I'll just let it. But not before talking to Minji.
I trudge through Evergreen's hallways straight to my locker. Winter and Yujin are waiting there, worry painted on their faces.
"Yuno!" Yujin exclaims as he sees me. "Are you alright? We waited by the convenience store, but you never showed up."
"A-and you didn't answer any of our t-texts or calls," Winter adds.
"I'm fine," I sigh, pushing past them to my locker. For a second, I want to tell them everything. The banquet. The argument. The kiss. God, the kiss. But the words don't come. They never do.
"Are you sure?" Yujin asks. "You look... not great."
"It's nothing. Just..." I can barely finish my thought as a crowd forms at the end of the hallway. The sound of chatter grows louder, seemingly centering around one person. I can just barely make out the top of their head.
"No clue." I could care less if it's some celebrity or the president or whoever the fuck. As far as I'm concerned, this day has already gone to shit. The last thing I need are any surprises. I shut my locker and turn to head to class, but someone running towards the crowd bumps against my shoulder. "Watch it, you fucking—"
The crowd parts just enough. And there he is. Sunghoon. Grinning. Laughing. Like none of it ever happened. He notices me watching. He fucking smirks.
My blood starts to boil. I don't care why he's here or why he has on the Evergreen uniform, all I know is that I need to hurt him. I stomp towards him, my breath growing heavier and my fists clenched, ready to give that son of a bitch what I should've given him last night. I barely register the sound of Yujin and Winter calling out to me. He needs to pay for what he did. I need to hurt him. I need to—
"Wait."
A hand grabs at my shoulder, stopping me in my tracks.
"What the fuck do you—" I look back and see Danielle's serious expression glaring back at me.
"Come with me. Now." Before I can answer, she pulls me down the hallway and away from Sunghoon. Yujin and Winter look back at me, confused, right before I turn the corner.
I groan in anger. "What are you doing?! I was right about to—"
"Shut up," she commands. "Minji told me everything. If I let you do what I think you're about to do, you would've regretted it."
"M-Minji?" All the anger leaves my system at the mention of her name. I stop resisting as she pulls me along, the echoing of voices growing fainter behind us. "Is she... Is she okay?"
We stop in front of a supply closet. "Why don't you ask her yourself?" she says, opening the door to the closet. In between the dusty shelves lined with cleaning supplies is Minji. I let out a breath I didn't know I was holding.
"You only have a couple minutes before class starts. Make it quick," Danielle explains before pushing me in and shutting the door, leaving the two of us in this cramped space.
We can barely meet each other's eyes. My skin suddenly feels very warm. Not uncomfortably so, just... warm. I open my mouth to say something, but nothing comes out. I spent all night and all morning wanting to do nothing more than talk to Minji, and yet, I have no idea where to start. So, I start with what anyone would start with.
"H-hi."
"Hi," Minji utters, her voice small yet steady.
"Um..." I gulp, trying to calm my nerves. "Are you okay?"
"Yeah. I think so."
"I, uh, I texted you. You never, y'know..."
"Right." She lets out a long sigh. "My parents took my phone away."
"Oh." At least she wasn't ignoring me on purpose this time. "I'm sorry."
She offers me a small yet reassuring smile. "It's okay, I'll just—"
"I'm sorry for leaving you," I blurt out. "Last night. I, uh... I should've stayed. I should've done something. Anything. You stood up for me, and I..."
Minji grabs my hand, cradling it gently in her palm. The words get caught in my throat and my heart stops for a moment, her touch like electricity against my skin. "Don't apologize," she says gently. "I'm the one that... did that to you. It was my fault. And I don't want you getting yelled at because of something I did."
I finally build up the courage to look her in the eyes. Even in the dim light of the supply closet, they somehow shine like the brightest stars in the night sky—Beautiful, yet unreachable. "It wasn't entirely your fault. I also... did that to you."
Minji chuckles softly, and I forget everything happening outside. Right now, it's just the two of us, hand in hand, in our own little pocket of the universe. No Sunghoon, no parents, no expectations—just us.
The one-minute warning bell reminds me that life isn't that simple.
"Hurry up, you two," Danielle reminds us from the other side of the door.
Minji lets out a heavy sigh, her gaze falling to the floor. "I'm sure you saw already, but Sunghoon enrolling here isn't just some coincidence. My father told me that I can't be around you anymore, and Sunghoon is here to make sure that I don't disobey him," she explains, her voice small.
My heart drops from my chest, free falling into the pit left in my stomach. "W-what? But—"
Danielle peeks her head through the door. "We have to head to class now or else we'll be late," she warns us, an apologetic look in her eyes.
"W-wait, I—"
"I'm sorry, Yuno," Minji says, letting go of my hand. "I'll think of something. Just... avoid me for now."
I can't get another word out before her and Danielle run off to class, leaving me alone in this musty supply closet. The space she occupied just seconds before seems so vast and empty now. Her warmth still lingers on my fingers. I don't want it to fade.
If I knew this would be the first and last time I got to hold her hand, I would've done everything I could just to hold her for a second longer. Now all I have is the ache of her hand leaving mine.
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My spork picks at the mush sitting on my lunch tray, completely untouched. No matter how loud the grumbling in my stomach gets, I just can't seem to bring myself to eat anything. Not after what just happened.
Minji's words echo through my mind. How am I supposed to just avoid her? A couple of weeks, that would've been easy—we were nothing more than passing faces to each other. But now, she's all I ever think about these days. I want to talk to her. I want to hear her voice. I want to be with her. But I can't. And it's all because of that rich piece of shit.
"U-um, Yuno?" Winter asks, her voice barely heard over the whirlwind in my head. "A-are you a-alright? You've b-been really quiet."
"Quieter than usual," Yujin adds. "It's getting a little worrying, man."
I sigh. "I'm just... having an off day. I'll be fine."
Yujin frowns, but doesn't push. "You'd tell us if something was wrong... right? We're your friends," he says. All I can give him is a small nod. I know I should tell them and quell their worries, but I just can't. I'm weighed down enough as it is. I don't need them going down with me.
A burst of laughter shoots out from the center of the lunch room. Sunghoon is at the middle of it all, chatting and laughing with Bryce's group of all people. Of fucking course. Trash attracts trash. He notices me looking at him, but I don't even bother trying to mask the anger in my eyes. Let him fucking glare back. In fact, I wish he would come up here and do something about it. My life is already fucked up as it is. I don't mind putting the last nail in the coffin if it means I get to slam him into the pavement.
"Y-Yuno..."
"WHAT!?" I bark, my chest rapidly rising with heavy breath. Half of the lunch room goes silent as they look back at me, confused and scared from my sudden outburst. It takes too long for me to comprehend Winter's eyes squeezed shut and her shaky hands shielding her face.
Shit. "S-sorry, I didn't..." I sigh, taking a moment to calm down. "I'm sorry, guys, I just... I-I..." What the hell is wrong with me?
Winter lowers her hands slowly, blinking at me with wide, glassy eyes like she doesn't even recognize me. I pick up my tray and toss it into the trash as the whole lunchroom watches me leave. I just need to be alone right now. I glance back at Yujin and Winter one last time, but I can't meet their eyes. All I see is Sunghoon's shit eating grin as the doors shut behind me.
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Minji's POV
I sigh, refreshing my email for the hundredth time, waiting for a response from my treasurer. Do people not check their emails nowadays? I could get a reply in seconds if I just had my phone.
I shut my laptop and rest my forehead on the table, feeling utterly exhausted despite barely making any progress on prom. The library is supposed to be a quiet place to get work done, but with all the noise rumbling around in my head, it's impossible to even think straight. Every time I try to get on track, Yuno's face pops up in my mind like an ad that I can't get rid of. One I don't even want to, honestly.
He looked so sad when we talked in the supply closet. So tired. We finally got a chance to talk last night, and now I have no idea when I'll be able to see him again. And that kiss. Everytime I close my eyes, it's like I can feel him on my lips again. That same electricity, that same warmth, that same tenderness.
"Yo Minj."
"AH!" I jump up in my seat, my yelp echoing throughout the library and receiving a harsh shush from the librarian.
Hanni points and laughs at me as my face grows warm from her ridicule. "Girl, what's got you all jumpy? Daydreaming about Yuno again?" she teases with that impish grin.
I sigh and faceplant into the table. "No... Maybe, I don't know..." I grumble.
"Aww, look at you, all in love and stuff." Hanni plops down into the chair next to me, laying her face down next to mine. "So how'd the banquet go? You never texted us back last night."
I let out a long groan, muffled by the table. "My parents took my phone."
"What? Why?"
"It's a long story."
"Ooh... Sounds serious." She scoots her chair closer to me. "I'm listening."
I sigh, mentally preparing myself to relive last night's events over again. "Okay, so... God, where do I even start?"
"Whatever you feel like telling me," she says, patting my back.
"Okay, uh... The banquet itself was fine, just a lot of talking to people. I could tell Yuno was overwhelmed, even if he tried not to show it. He ended up sneaking outside to get some fresh air, and then we had a chance to talk, just the two of us. I apologized to him for freaking out about the, uh—"
"The kiss you almost had in the nurse's office?" Hanni interjects with an impish grin.
Is she trying to spill my secrets to the whole library?! "Hanni!"
"What, am I wrong?" she giggles.
"...N-no." I swear, she's going to give me a heart attack one of these days. "A-anyways, I finally got to apologize, and then we just continued talking, and then, uh... We, uh..." Oh God. I kissed him for real. That wasn't an "almost" or a dream or some hallucination—that was real.
The way I go silent and red in the face must have set off an alarm in Hanni's head because all of a sudden, her grin spreads so wide, the Cheshire cat would look like a regular stray kitten.
"You...! Did you two...?! You did, didn't you?!" Hanni rapidly fires, smacking my arm in excitement. "Minji, Oh my god!"
I bury my face into my hands, the delayed realization hitting me like a speeding train. I kissed Yuno Lin. For the first time in my life, I, Minji Kim, kissed a boy. And it was amazing.
And now I can never see that boy again.
I let out a long, sad groan into my hands at the thought. I've been a straight-A student all my life, I've helped out whenever I could, I try my best to show everyone kindness and respect, can't the universe throw me a bone and let me have this one thing go right? I love my parents, but why should their opinions matter when it's my life at the end of the day? I just want to date a stupid boy.
"Hello," I hear Danielle's voice greet, followed by the sound of her taking the seat next to me. "What's her problem?"
"Did you know about this?!" Hanni asks her.
"The banquet? Yeah, Minji filled me in earlier. Yuno was there, Minji got to apologize, and then that one guy she hates got her in trouble, and now she has no phone and can't speak to Yuno. Did I miss anything?"
"So you knew about the kiss and didn't tell me?! Dani!"
"Kiss? What kiss?"
I peek through my fingers, catching Danielle's eyes, wide with concern, aimed straight at me. "I, um... I may have, uh..." I stutter.
Danielle gasps, clapping her hands over her mouth. "Minji!"
"Shhh!" the librarian shoots at us from her desk. "Ladies, keep it down!"
"S-sorry..." I mutter with an apologetic smile.
"Wait, who's the guy that you hate?" Hanni asks.
"Sunghoon," I grimace, his name leaving a bad taste in my mouth. "He's just an awful human being. Our parents are friends, so I was forced to be around him basically my entire childhood. He caught Yuno and I... y'know... and told my parents about it, so now I don't have my phone, and he enrolled into Evergreen today to make sure that Yuno and I can't be around each other."
"Jeez, dude," Hanni sighs, resting her head on my shoulder. "That really sucks."
Danielle pats my knee, nodding in agreement. "We'll do whatever we can to help, okay? This is a very... complicated situation, but you shouldn't have to deal with all that alone."
I breathe, feeling slightly lighter than before. "Thanks. That means a lot."
The hair on the back of my neck suddenly stands up as I feel an off-putting presence enter the room. My gaze shoots the library doors, and the devil himself walks in, strutting around like he hasn't just ruined my life. Sunghoon leans against the librarian's desk, shooting her that cheesy smirk. It's all just an act, a mask that he puts on to trick other people into thinking he's a good person. But I know the truth. Underneath that mask is nothing but an ugly slimeball of arrogance and egotism.
He notices me glaring at him, grins, and shoots a wink in my direction before walking off. Disgusting. If karma exists, I hope it takes everything Sunghoon ever did to me and gives it back to him tenfold. If only fate were that kind.
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Yuno's POV
Yujin and Winter exchange concerned glances as I lean against my locker, just barely holding myself up. As if yesterday wasn't bad enough, today I somehow feel so much worse. Still couldn't get a wink of sleep, still couldn't bring myself to take a bite of breakfast, and I'm honestly surprised I managed to make it to school without passing out in the middle of the street.
"Winter, this is getting really bad," Yujin mutters to her. She whispers something back into his ear that I can't quite make out. Fuck, I still haven't apologized about my outburst at lunch yesterday. I just left without another word. It seems like that's all I'm good for these days.
I open my mouth. Try to say anything. But all that comes out is a grunt, like even my throat has given up on me.
"Yuno, we've tried being patient, but this is getting too much," Yujin says, raising his voice a bit. "What is going on?"
I look at them. I see the worry in their eyes, their lips pressed together into thin lines, waiting for me to say the magic words that'll make all of this go away. I want to tell them. God, I really want to. But I can't. What good would it do?
Maybe they'd want to help, but there's nothing they can do to change the fact that I'm still the same piece of shit that Minji's parents believe I am. If they somehow get rid of Sunghoon, then what's next? They send another ten Sunghoon's to spy on us in his place? They move Minji to a different school halfway across the world? Hell, they probably have enough money to pay a hitman to make my death look like an accident. And with how my life is going, maybe I wouldn't mind that.
"I'm... fine," I lie, my voice scratchy and low.
Yujin just sighs, his head hanging low. "No, you're not..." I hear him mutter under his breath.
I just need a moment for myself to think. Some peace and quiet. That'll help. Surely. I stumble past the two of them, dragging my feet underneath me, my vision just clear enough for me to not bump into anyone else in the hallway. I don't know what I'm gonna do or how I'm gonna do it—I never have—but the fluorescent lights are too bright, and the colored tiles on the ground are too dull, and everything is just so loud, and I just need to be alone right now.
Through the vague silhouette of students, I meet a certain pair of honey brown eyes at the end of the hallway and time stops. It's quiet now. It feels like forever since I last got to peer into Minji's eyes. She's so close—yet, we couldn't be farther apart than now. There's so much I want to say. I miss her. No amount of physical pain I've ever suffered compares to the aching in my heart when I think about her. I almost wish I never met Minji just so I never have to feel this way.
The illusion breaks as Sunghoon steps into my sight, towing around the worst kinds of people Evergreen has to offer. That son of a bitch. Worse yet, he approaches Minji, and they all crowd around her. I can't make out what they're saying. They're all laughing around her, but she looks uncomfortable. Sunghoon just keeps on flapping his lips, spewing some bullshit probably.
And then he puts his arm around her—before I can take a second to think, my legs are already dragging me towards him. My heart beats loudly in my chest, pumping adrenaline into the rest of my body, preparing me for what I'm about to do. I don't care anymore. I don't care who he is or what Minji's parents will do if I touch him. I'm sorry, Minji, but old habits die hard.
"...Minji and I are actually old childhood friends—AGH!" I interrupt whatever stupid story he was telling and grab his neck, slamming him into the lockers with a loud thud that echoes throughout the hallways. Everyone goes silent, watching this whole scene with bated breath. Fuck it. Let them watch. I want everyone to see the beating I'm about to give this son of a bitch.
My ears ring like sirens going off in my head. My chest rises with rapid breath. I squeeze my hand, tightening my hold on Sunghoon's neck, desperately wanting to see the life drain from his eyes—but all he does is laugh. Like this is some fucking joke. Like taking away the one thing that made me happy was some harmless prank.
"I-I'm sure... Minji's p-parents... would love to h-hear about this," he manages to choke out. Tell them for all I care. Let's see how you talk with a broken windpipe.
"Yuno!"
I hear Minji's voice, and all of a sudden, I come back to my senses. The way she says my name, her voice cracking like she's stepping carefully on thin ice, trying not to fall under. Regret fills my head like a thick smoke, making it hard to decipher what's right and wrong.
"Put him down. Please," she urges gently. Reluctantly, I loosen my grip on Sunghoon's throat and drop him to the floor. My hand shakes like it has a mind of its own, yelling at me for not following through. It would have been so easy to end everything right then and there. But I didn't. Because of Minji.
I glance back at her, at Yujin and Winter, at the crowd of students watching, bewildered and completely terrified. I don't say anything—What could I even say in a situation like this?—and I just walk off to god knows where.
Everyone's staring. I can feel Minji's eyes on the back of my head, the words I didn't say burning holes in my throat. I don't turn. I don't stop. I just need a single fucking moment.
To think. To breathe. To not exist.
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Minji's POV
My laptop is open. The student council room is peaceful, quiet, the kind of calm I crave when I'm working—but all I can do is stare blankly at the screen. How can I possibly focus after witnessing all of that?
It was... scary. I've never seen Yuno look like that. Sure, I'm aware of his past and the things he's done, but he didn't seem like his normal self. I'm worried about him. My mind keeps replaying that same scene over and over again, Yuno's hand wrapped around Sunghoon's throat, trying to make sense of it all. I keep seeing that look in Yuno's eyes. That wasn't his normal self. It was something much, much darker.
I don't know. I just hope he's okay.
"Hey there," a voice says from the doorway.
I flinch. Speak of the devil. Sunghoon steps into the room, that same off-putting grin plastered on his face as he looks around the room. "Nice place you got here," he comments, chuckling at his own joke.
I don't look at him. "What do you want?"
"I come bearing gifts." He sets a wrapped pastry in front of me. "You look tired. You should eat something, y'know, fuel for the brain."
I slide the pastry back towards him. "No thanks."
"C'mon, Minji. I insist." He slides it back towards me, and it takes me every ounce of my self-control to not blow up in his face.
"Is this all you came to do?" I ask curtly, not sparing him a glance.
"Well, no. I actually came to talk to you. Heard you were in charge of prom preparations."
"Yeah. So what?"
"Just wanted to know how things were going." Sunghoon sits back onto the table, relaxed and slow. How pleasant it must be, to live so selfishly. "Do you... have a date for prom?" he asks, looking up at the ceiling.
I slam onto the keyboard a bit too hard, grabbing his attention. "If you don't have anything useful to say, then I suggest you leave. Only student council members are permitted to enter this room."
"What's got you so worked up?" he chuckles, as if I said something funny. Surely, he has to be doing this on purpose? There's no way he's this oblivious, right?
"Look, can you just leave already? I'm trying to get work done."
He scoffs. "What is your problem? I'm trying to be the nice guy here and you're acting like I kicked your dog."
I huff, pinching the bridge of my nose in frustration. "Are you kidding me? After everything you did, you think you're still the nice guy in this situation?"
"Oh my god, is this about what happened with Yuno?" He lets out a laugh full of amusement. "He's the one that attacked me, I'm the victim here!"
"Maybe you deserved it," I mutter.
The smirk from his face drops just a bit. "You don't mean that."
"Why wouldn't I? You've only been here two days and you've done nothing but make life harder for both of us."
Sunghoon squeezes his eyes shut and lets out a long exhale. "I can't believe you're still hung up over him. Can't you see that he's wrong for you?"
"You don't even know him—"
"I don't need to know him!" he lashes out, jumping to his feet and pacing around the room. His mask slips, just for a moment. There he is. "He's nothing but a knuckle-dragging gorilla that only knows how to solve problems with his fists!"
"Sunghoon, shut up—"
"You've only known this guy for what, a couple weeks?! I've been there for you my whole life! I've always looked out for you!"
"I don't need you looking out for me! I never have!" I shoot back. My vision stings. My chest is about to explode. But I won't cry. I won't give him that satisfaction.
"Oh my god, do you know how insane you sound?! You're making the worst decision of your life by choosing him!"
I slam my laptop and stand up to meet his level. "Get out," I command, low and firm. "Now."
He scoffs in my face. "Minji, let's just—"
"OUT!"
The echo of my own voice rings in my ears. My throat burns from the scream. But I don't regret it.
Sunghoon flinches at my outburst. "Fine," he mutters, straightening out his uniform. I don't stop glaring at him until he leaves the room, and even then, my gaze stays focused on the door for a few minutes after he leaves like I'm expecting him to pop his stupid little face back through the doorway.
After standing there for a while, I finally collapse back into my chair—exhausted, frustrated, and utterly lost.
All this stress because I kissed a boy.
One moment of happiness. And somehow, everything fell apart.
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Yuno's POV
I should've kept my head down.
I should've walked away.
I should've known better.
But I didn't. And now...
God, what the hell am I even doing anymore?
I don't know how long I've been sitting here in this empty classroom. Could be hours. Maybe the bell rang. It doesn't matter. I'm just... tired. Not the kind of tired that a couple hours of sleep can fix. I can feel it rooted in my bones, eating away at my organs like a cancer.
My phone keeps buzzing every now and then. I don't bother to check them anymore. It's just Yujin and Winter. I don't even know where to begin with them. I feel sick, pushing them away like this. But I can't move. I can't speak. I can't do anything but sit here and stare at the dusty shelf by the windows.
Maybe I would've been content never meeting Minji. If I hadn't offered to walk her home, if I hadn't spent the night at her house, if I hadn't ridden that Ferris wheel with her, then maybe I would never have learned the pain of having someone so close to your heart, only to be ripped away in the blink of an eye. That night underneath the full moon where we shared our first and final kiss felt like so long ago.
She was right there. In my arms. The stars reflected in her eyes, her hair draping down her neck like silk, her lips gently pressed against mine, soft and delicate. I wonder if it was all real or just a mirage created by fate to trick me into thinking something good could happen.
For a moment, I try to picture life without Minji. Floating from class to class, head down and my hands in my pockets. Probably continue sticking my nose into places where I shouldn't be, getting into more fights, gaining some new bruises. Maybe I would be expelled at this point. Or worse. But at least I wouldn't have to feel like this. I would never have to know what I was missing.
My phone buzzes against the desk. Then another. And another. I groan and finally check it, expecting another text from Yujin or Winter.
But it's not them.
An unknown number flashes on the screen, calling me. I answer it. I don't know why. Maybe curiosity or a random gut feeling.
I say hello, I think. It comes out more like a grunt than a greeting. An unfamiliar female voice comes through the speaker. She asks me if I'm Yuno Lin. I say yes. Her words come in vague blurs, but her tone sounds urgent. Something about a hospital. Alcohol withdrawals. Passing out on the street.
My dad.
I hang up before she can finish and sprint out of the room. My feet slam against the ground with each step, trying to navigate through the halls. I get weird looks. I knock a few people over. But I don't care.
I just need to get to the hospital as soon as I can. Please be okay. Please, please, please...
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The doors of the ER blast open and I stumble in, sweat dripping down my face and my legs on fire from running all the way here. Everything is immediately overwhelming—the fluorescent lights, the onslaught of chatter, the sharp scent of chemicals. I rush over to the front desk, gripping the counter to keep from falling over.
"I-I got a call," I gasp. "M-my dad, Ian Lin. They said he was brought here."
The nurse behind the counter glances up at me, already typing something into the computer. "Your name?"
"Yuno. Yuno Lin."
She types some more, picks up the phone, and says something into it that I can't make out over the roaring in my ears
"He's in Room 12. A nurse will come shortly to escort you there."
My eyes dart around to the various hallways leading to who knows where. Fuck. Where's Room 12? Where am I supposed to go? The last time I was at the ER was when my mom...
"Yuno Lin?" A woman in navy scrubs calls out my name, beckoning me gently. "This way."
I follow her down the white hallways, passing by rooms full of sick and injured people. White's supposed to make you feel at ease, but all it does is conjure up old memories of the worst day of my life. The constant beeping of machines, nurses and doctors talking over each other, the fear in my mind making me unable to think straight. For fuck's sake, I can't go through this again.
We arrive at Room 12 and I see my dad laying there, unconscious and hooked up to various machines. His hands tremor against the sheets. Sweat covers his body. His skin's gone pale like wax. He's never looked this small before.
But he's breathing. It's weak, but he's breathing.
"Your father was brought in after having a seizure, likely triggered by alcohol withdrawals," the nurse says gently. "He's stable for now and getting the care he needs, but we'll be monitoring him closely for the next 24 to 48 hours. He's dehydrated and his vitals were erratic when he came in, but we've got him on fluids and medication to manage the symptoms."
I don't speak. I just watch my dad's chest rise and fall slowly with breath. The nurse gives me a soft pat on the shoulder before exiting the room, leaving me alone with him. I don't move. I can't. Like there's an invisible barrier between me and the hospital bed. Like I'm just watching him through a screen. I'm afraid if I get any closer, it'll all be too real.
Eventually, I turn around and leave, only to be met with the same sad white walls that line the inside his room. My legs can only carry me a couple steps before I collapse onto a bench in the hallway. I'm so fucking exhausted. Not just from today or yesterday—from the past 18 years of my life. I don't know why I bother waking up when this is all there is. This lonely, draining, shitty existence.
I let out a single, shaky breath. And then the tears start to fall. They drain from my eyes like a dam that finally breaks, leaking through my fingers even as I try to cover it up. Is this really it for me? Dragging myself through life, just to end up here again—same tragedy, same helplessness, same shitty story. Just with a different parent in the bed this time.
The gentle hand of a stranger rests on my shoulder as I cry. I don't turn to see who it is. I couldn't face anyone. Not like this. But as the tears dry up and there's no more left to cry, I'm forced to confront the fact that the world is still turning. I'm still here.
"Th-thanks," I mutter softly, sniffling. I turn my head to meet the kind stranger that sat by me, but with the tears clouding my vision, I swear they look like Minji for a moment.
I can't help but let out a low chuckle. "God, do I really miss her that much?" I ask, more to myself than them. "I'm sorry you had to—Minji?"
A small smile breaks through her trembling lips.
"Hey," she whispers.
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Minji's POV
The hospital room smells like bleach and wilted flowers. The TV's stuck on some stock report that I don't care to understand and the constant beeping feels like it's coming from everywhere and nowhere all at once.
I sit quietly, smiling like I care—but I don't know this man. He's just some high-ranking executive at my father's company. I don't know why he's here, or what illness he has, or what I'm supposed to feel. Frankly, I couldn't care less. I'm just here to keep up appearances that the Kims are a put-together, stable, nuclear family.
"Thank you again for visiting me, sir!" the man says to my father. "And Minji, it's so good to see you again! You've grown up a lot since I last saw you."
I give him a polite smile. It doesn't reach my eyes. "It's a pleasure to see you as well."
My father checks his watch. "We should get going. We do hope you feel better soon, Mr. Nam." It's almost impressive how a kind sentiment like that manages to lack so much warmth, even as he says it with a full smile. I wonder if that's where I learned it from.
As soon as the door shuts behind us, the curtains close and the three of us are back to our regular selves—cold, distant, and silent. The hallways echo with the sound of expensive shoes, too expensive to be sensible for a hospital. Appearances are appearances. They tell me what to wear and how to act, like I'm their perfect little doll instead of their living, breathing, human daughter. It's all about the illusion—give everyone a good look so they think you're fine.
"How were classes today, dear?," my mother asks as we step onto the elevator. It descends to the first floor with a monotonous hum.
"They were fine, mother," I answer. Succinct, poised, and proper—exactly how they told me to speak.
"Just fine? I can set you up with a private tutor if those classes aren't challenging enough for you," she says, taking out her phone. "Mrs. Park recommended me all of Sunghoon's tutors, their résumés are truly remarkable."
I fight back a sigh. The last thing I need is to start an argument in this cramped space. "I will... think about it."
Thankfully, she leaves it at that. The doors open to the first floor, and as we make our way towards the exit, I feel an odd tingling sensation on the back of my neck. I freeze in my tracks, an invisible force keeping me from moving.
"Minji?" my father says, looking back at me. "What are you doing? Let's go."
I shake my head. "Sorry, I just feel... odd." I look around at the hospital, searching for something—but I'm not sure what. My eyes dart from person to person, looking for a hint of familiarity within them.
"Is something the matter, dear?" my mother asks, but I don't answer. I'm not sure what it is, but I feel like if I exit those doors, I'll regret it for the rest of myself. Through the haze of sterile white coats and tired faces, I spot him—a lone boy, hunched over on a bench, shoulders trembling, hands in his face.
My breath catches in my throat. In an instant, I know who it is. I make a dash for him, ignoring my parents calling out to me as a thousand questions float around in my head.
Why is Yuno here?
Is he okay?
Why is he crying?
I slow down as I near the bench, not wanting to startle him. My heart breaks in two seeing him like this—crying, alone, in the hospital of all places. I sit down next to him, placing a gentle hand on his shoulder. Each sob sipples through his body and it takes all my restraint not to cry with him. Whatever happened, he needs support. And I want to be that for him. So many words dance on the tip of my tongue, but I keep them to myself for now. We'll have a chance to talk later. I'm sure of it.
I stay with him until the end. Eventually, Yuno calms down and lifts his head up. He looks... beat down. Like he hasn't slept in days. His words back at the banquet echo in my head, reminding me of just how much he suffered in his life. He doesn't deserve this. He doesn't deserve any of this. I want Yuno to be happy. I want to see him smile without fear. I want to see him laugh without constantly looking over his shoulder. I want to see what he looks like when he's freely and truly happy.
I don't care about what my parents think, or what Sunghoon thinks, or what anyone else thinks about him for that matter. He deserves to live a life where pain isn't the only thing he knows.
"Th-thanks," Yuno mutters softly as he turns to face me. He lets out a low chuckle, wiping the tears from his eyes. "God, do I really miss her that much?"
I grow curious for a moment. Who does he miss?
"I'm sorry you had to—Minji?"
I push the thought to the back of my mind, a small smile breaking through my trembling lips as I gaze at Yuno's face for the first time in what feels like forever.
My parents have always drilled into me the importance of being well-rested in order to set yourself up for a successful day, and subsequently, a successful life. Ever since I was born, I had stuck to a strict sleep schedule of 10PM to 6AM to hit the recommended eight hours of good quality sleep each night—and then I broke that schedule just for a boy. The worst part is I don't even care.
Hanni has given me her fair share of complaints about my bed time, yet here I am, throwing my morals out just to listen to Yuno's voice a bit longer. There's a certain roughness to his voice that I can't help but play over and over in my mind. The way he speaks so gently, and that awkward charming lilt in his voice when he's uncertain—I feel like a swarm of butterflies is about to burst from my chest.
But enough about that now. I need to stay focused on the task at hand: convincing my parents to let me bring a plus one to the banquet. Specifically, I need them to let me bring Yuno, the one person they told me to stay away from.
Like usual, my parents are on their phones, responding to emails and such over breakfast. I set down my utensils and inhale deeply, firming up my resolve as best as I can. "Um, Mother? Father?" I mutter.
They both look up at me. "Yes, dear?" Mother answers.
"About the banquet tomorrow—"
"Right, Ms. Park told about how excited Sunghoon is to finally see you again after so long. Isn't that nice?"
I bite my tongue to keep myself from cringing over how not nice that sounds. "Y-yeah, that's great!" I lie through a smile. "Actually, I wanted to ask if I could, um... bring a friend to the banquet."
My parents exchange looks that I can't quite decipher, communicating in that special telepathy that married couples seem to have. "Who did you want to bring, dear?"
"Um..." Here goes nothing. "...Yuno."
"Absolutely not!" Mother exclaims a bit too quickly. "We explicitly made it clear that we don't want you associating with that boy! Why not bring Danielle, or even Hanni would be more acceptable than him."
The grimace on her face makes my blood boil, but now is not the time for my feelings to get in the way. "Well, he... wants to learn more about the business!" I blurt out. Mother's expression remains unwavering, but I notice Father's brow raising with the slightest bit of intrigue. It's not much, but I need all the help I can get.
"The topic of our family business came up, and he was so inspired by Father's origin story and how he managed to make a million dollar company from completely nothing." I put on a wide smile, hoping, praying that my father takes the bait. Please, I need this to go well.
Neither of them say anything for a while, so I continue. "I thought the banquet would be a good opportunity for him to get a foot in the door, maybe even do some networking." As a final act of desperation, I reach for my father's hand across the table and put on the best puppy eyes I can muster. "I feel like Yuno could really learn a lot from you, Father. You two are always emphasizing the importance of making strong connections to further my career, so why can't I be the connection that helps Yuno?"
Mother scoffs. "Do you really expect us to—"
"Hold on, dear," Father interrupts her. I hold my breath as he falls into a pensive silence for what feels like an eternity.
"I believe we should give this boy a chance."
Fireworks go off in my head. My plan is actually going to work. I'm so happy I could cry.
"I've always had a firm belief in education, both in and out of the classroom," he explains. "This banquet could be an opportunity for him to better himself. He clearly has no plans for the future otherwise."
Mother opens her mouth to argue, but all that comes out is a sigh of defeat. "Fine, we will permit that boy to come to the banquet."
It takes all my self control to not immediately burst into cheers. "Thank you, Mother," I utter calmly.
"But," she adds, "If he causes any trouble whatsoever, we will personally ensure that you never speak to that boy again, understood?"
"Absolutely, I will make sure he stays out of trouble, and—"
"And I don't want you being alone with him. We'll have Sunghoon stay with you two the entire night."
She casually brings her mug to her lips as if she didn't just drop a huge bomb on my entire plan. All my efforts, dashed in the blink of an eye.
It's only morning and I'm already exhausted.
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Yuno's POV
As I wait in front of the convenience store, I can't help but notice how warm the morning sun feels against my skin. A small flock of birds fly overhead, whizzing this way and that in their own choreographed dance. An unblemished sky hangs overhead, the same blue as the ocean. Does the outside always look this pretty?
"Yuno!!"
Yujin sees me and bolts from across the street, a gleamy-eyed Winter following behind him.
"Good morning, Yuno!" she says.
"Hey guys." I greet them with a wave. They both suddenly stop in their tracks, eyes going wide. "...What?"
"You're smiling," Winter states as if its the most insane thing she's ever seen.
I turn my head away, suddenly feeling self-conscious. "So what?"
"Aw Winter, you ruined it," Yujin teases. "He looked so happy."
I sigh. "...Let's just go." The two of them laugh, taking their spots on either side of me like it's where they belong.
Alright, maybe my mood has improved a little bit. A whole night spent talking to Minji over the phone will do that to a guy. In the quiet hours of the night, I felt like I had learned so much about her and the life she lives when I'm not around. She talked about her older brother, Minhyuk, a soccer prodigy that's currently studying computer science at a prestigious university, her memories of cooking food with her grandma during trips to Korea, how her and Hanni ended becoming best friends during freshmen year. All these memories and stories that make up who she is, and she shared all of that with me? How could I not be happy?
Part of me feels like all these good things could just be some dream. That I'll wake up suddenly and none of this is real. How could the sky look this blue? How could the air smell this fresh? How could the same route I walk to school every day suddenly seem more alive?
But the way Yujin nudges my side to show me a drawing he's working on or the way Winter clutches my shoulder after tripping on a rock lets me know that all of this is real. All of these good things are real. The world that I used to hate waking up to is now a world that I can look at with a smile.
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The facade had to end at some point. Navigating through the halls of Evergreen, I can feel the familiar stares from others as I pass by, eyeing me like some kind of untamed beast that could attack at any moment. Even with everything else changing around me, I can always count on the student body to stay consistent. Although, something in their eyes feels a little peculiar. Instead of just fear, there's something else hiding behind it. Intrigue? Admiration?
"P-people sure d-do stare a lot, h-huh?" Winter asks, her voice shrinking to a mere whisper.
"Yeah, I guess they do." I glance back at them, both their gazes glued to the ground, clearly not used to the unwanted attention. "Sorry."
"It's okay, Yuno, it's not your fault," Yujin reassures me.
"Y-yeah, I'm sure w-we'll get used to it," Winter adds with a small grin. Man, what did I do to deserve these two?
The five minute warning bell rings, sending the students still left in the hallways in a hurry. I say my goodbyes to Winter and Yujin as we part ways, enduring the usual stares and hushed voices as I make my way to my seat in the back. Still, something feels odd about the way they're looking at me today. I try to meet their eyes to get a better look, but everyone keeps looking away, pretending like they weren't whispering about me to their friends. If this keeps going on for the rest of the day, I'm gonna be pissed.
"Yuno Lin to the principal's office, Yuno Lin to the principal's office. Now," the PA system announces, giving me a wave of deja vu. I have a couple guesses for what this could be about...
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Instead of coming out the gate swinging, Mr. Geier just sits at his desk, his hands clasped in deep thought. Normally, I would be pretty indifferent to whatever he has to say, but after everything Minji said to me, I suddenly feel guilty sitting in front of him. It probably isn't easy dealing with my shit on a weekly basis.
"So..." he starts, finally looking up at me after a few minutes of silence. "I'm sure you know why you're in here, Yuno."
"Yup..."
He sighs. "The McGraw's donate a lot of money to this school. They didn't exactly take well to receiving a call that their son was found unconscious in the bathroom with a broken nose."
Ah shit. This is it. The consequences of my actions have finally caught up to me. Fate, you cruel bastard, making me wake up in a good mood for the first time in years, only to send me to jail before the day even starts. Goodbye dad, Yujin, Winter, and Minji. Minji...
"But..."
But...!
"...They've decided not to press charges."
"What!?" I exclaim, relieved and deeply confused.
"We received a tip from one of the boys on the football team that Tyler had been bullying a group of freshman boys for months. They still wanted to press charges anyways, but I may have... insinuated that if they did, I would ensure Tyler could only set foot into a community college at best."
My eyes widen, slowly connecting the dots. "Did you...?"
"No, it was not for you," he states matter-of-factly. "It was for the sake of all the freshmen that suffered because of him."
"Right." I sink back into my chair, feeling sheepish. "So... what happens now? Detention? Suspension?"
"No, I have something else in mind for you."
Just then, the door to Mr. Geier's office swings open, sending in a wave of lavender and rainbows into his office as the girl of my dreams walks through.
"You wanted to see me, Mr. Geier?" Minji says before turning to me, a quizzical look in her eyes.
"Perfect timing, Minji," he says, "This is Yuno Lin. Yuno, this is Minji Kim, the student council president."
Minji shoots me a confused look, but I'm too distracted by her beauty to pay full attention. Her hair is in a ponytail today with two strands of hair framing her perfect face. The sound of my thumping heart gets louder in my ears, drowning out whatever Geier is saying. Hopefully it's not anything important. What could be more important than Minji? God, she's so pretty, I—
"Yuno, are you paying attention?" Mr. Geier snaps at me.
"S-sorry, what?" Out of the corner of my eye, I catch Minji stifling a giggle, making my cheeks burn red.
"As I was saying, your punishment will be to help Minji with prom preparations. Whatever she asks you to do, you do it. If you cause any trouble for her, she'll report it to me and you will face the consequences, understand?"
You mean I get to spend more time with Minji? As a punishment? "Yup, I understand," I say, trying not to look too eager.
"Good." He turns towards Minji. "Just make him lift the heavy stuff or something. He can be a handful, but he, uh... He means well." How sweet, Geier. I'm blushing.
"That shouldn't be much of a problem," she says, smirking. "We've actually met bef—"
"U-uh, it's nice to meet you for the first time ever, Ms. President!" I exclaim, shoving my hand towards her before she can utter another word. If Geier finds out that his "punishment" is more like a "blessing" for me, he'll probably give me some other grunt work to deal with.
Minji awkwardly shakes my hand, giving me a curious expression. "It's, uh, nice to meet you too, Yuno." The feeling of her soft hand against mine beats out any kind of embarrassment I should be feeling right now.
"Alright, you can head back to class now, Minji," Mr. Geier dismisses her. She gives me a small yet bewildered grin before exiting his office, leaving me alone with the principal yet again. My gaze lingers towards the door even after it closes, wishing she'll pop back in for a few more seconds.
"So," he begins, taking me out of my daydreams. "You got lucky. Extremely lucky. However, that doesn't mean you can keep doing this and expecting to get out scot-free just because I stick my neck out for you. There are rules here, and I understand that you may not agree with those rules, but they are there regardless, which means you must follow them just like everybody else. No more playing vigilante just because you can, you understand?"
"Yeah, I understand. I'm sorry."
"I—you what?" He asks, his eyes wide with surprise.
"Uh, I said I understand and I'm sorry," I reiterate sheepishly.
"Oh. Okay. Well. Good. As long as you understand." It's almost offensive just how shocked he is, as if I didn't know my own actions were wrong. I might be stubborn, but I'm not stupid.
"I'm going back to class," I state, getting up from my chair. Right before I exit his office, I turn to Geier one last time. "Uh, my dad is doing better now."
He looks up at me, the corners of his mouth curling into a smile. "Really? That's great to hear, Yuno."
I give him a nod before shutting the door behind me. I'm not sure what exactly compelled me to tell him that, just a hunch that told me it was the right thing to do at the moment. Geier did ask about him last time, so it only makes sense. I guess.
As I turn the corner, I catch Minji leaning against the wall right outside of Geier's office. Was she waiting for me?
"Oh. Hey," I greet her with a small wave.
"Hey!" She says, flashing me a smile that could bring about world peace. "What did Mr. Geier talk to you about? If you don't mind me asking, of course."
"It was about the, uh... thing that happened with Tyler."
"Ah, right. So his idea of a punishment for you is to be around me? Ouch," she jokes.
"If it makes you feel any better, I don't think it's a punishment at all," I say, thinking out loud.
"That's very kind of you, Yuno," she chimes, a hint of pink gracing her cheeks. Simply being around her is making my heart pound like crazy. Can she hear it? God, I hope not. How am I supposed to control myself when she's this cute? I just want to—
"Oh!" Minji suddenly stops and points at my face. Shit, was I thinking out loud again? Is she secretly psychic and can hear all my thoughts this whole time?
"W-what?" I ask, flustered.
"You're smiling."
I awkwardly clear my throat, wiping the smile off my face. "Y-yeah, so what? Am I not allowed to smile?"
She giggles at me. "No, you're allowed to smile. In fact, I think you should smile more often, I rarely ever get to see it."
"W-whatever," I mutter, trying to hide the growing blush on my face. "About the banquet tomorrow, is there a dress code or something? I, uh, don't own a suit," I ask, changing the subject.
Minji's expression suddenly darkens as a dejected sigh floats from her lips. "Oh right, the banquet..." she groans.
"Sorry for bringing it up."
"No, it's fine," she assures me. "My parents just told me this morning that if I'm gonna bring you along, the guy I'm trying to avoid has to stick around us the whole time, rendering my whole plan basically useless."
"This guy you're trying to avoid, is he, um...." I gulp nervously. "...your ex?"
"Ew! Oh my god, no!" Minji exclaims. "He's the son of my parents' business partners. He used to be a complete menace towards me when we were kids until he moved away during middle school. Oh my god, the thought of us ever dating is just..." Her entire body shivers in disgust.
I try my best to appear neutral, but inside, fireworks are going off in my head. It's like Christmas came early this year. I have to physically fight off another smile from growing on my face.
"So, what are we gonna do now? Maybe..." I search my mind for another possible solution for her problem, but only one comes up, and frankly, it's the best possible case for her and the worst possible case for me. I sigh in disappointment. "...maybe I just shouldn't go."
Her gaze shoots up at me. "What?"
"If I don't go, then you won't be forced to be around him the entire time," I explain.
"But I—"
"I'll probably stick out like a sore thumb anyways, being in a room full of a bunch of rich business people. Your parents already don't like me, what would they all think of me being around you? Maybe it's best if I don't go—"
"Stop!" She suddenly exclaims, a fire burning in her irises. "I invited you because I want you to go, okay? Screw my original plan, screw everyone who judges you, and especially screw Sunghoon! You're my friend and I want you to be there, don't worry about all that superficial nonsense." Her chest rises and falls with heavy breaths, carrying the determination of her words. No wonder people voted for her as student council president, a speech like that could move anyone to action.
After a short pause, I concede. "...Okay, I'll go."
A smile replaces the serious expression she had, sending my heart into another frenzy. "Thank you, Yuno. All you have to do is enjoy yourself, don't worry about scaring him off or anything dumb like that."
Enjoy myself. At a banquet. That I certainly don't belong in. Sure, I can do that.
"I should probably head back to the student council room, I still have a lot of work to do," she says. "I, um... I'm glad we had this talk. I'll see ya later." And just like that, Minji disappears down the halls, leaving me standing here like a fool in love. The warmth in my chest feels like it's gonna get hotter and hotter until I explode. I desperately hope she needs my help with prom preparations later.
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The presence of a substitute would normally mean all chaos ensues, but the odd tension hanging in the air during English practically suffocates any chances of socialization. I didn't exactly mind nor care, but the silence only made the nervous glances towards me even more obvious. Furthermore, thanks to Tyler's "disappearance", his friends on the other side of the room don't even try to hide their accusatory pointing and disdainful glares. Their sentiments aren't exactly wrong, but it's still annoying being on the receiving end of them. Surely, they know better than to start any dumb shit right now.
And yet, I'm unsurprisingly proven wrong as one of them, a tall boy with blonde hair (is his name Connor? Colton? I have no clue), stomps towards me with fury in his eyes.
"Hey," he growls at me, "You wouldn't happen to know what happened to Tyler, would you?"
A sigh escapes me. Welp, that's what I get for getting my hopes up. "Is he not here today? I had no idea," I mutter, not giving him so much as a glance.
He slams his fist into my desk, causing everyone to look back at the commotion with fearful glances, including Winter. I shake my head reassuringly at her, but unfortunately, Tyler's friend notices this and scoffs to himself.
"Behind the gym during lunch. Don't be late." He glances in Winter's direction with a smirk on his face. "Or else."
My fingernails dig into my palms as I ball my fist up in anger, my heart pumping with anger. For the first time since he came over, I glare at him, watching his cocky facade crack in front of my eyes as he scurries back to his little group with his tail in between his legs.
Dammit. God fucking dammit. Is it so hard for me to have one good day without having to deal with anyone's shit? I notice Winter still staring at me with a worried look, so I conjure up my best convincing smile. She nods and turns back to her book, but I'm not sure if it ends up working.
It's clear that he wants a fight. Of course he wants a goddamn fight.
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Yuno: I won't be at lunch. I have something I need to deal with.
I send the text to the group chat as I pace around, waiting for Tyler's goons to show up. The area behind the school's gym is basically a cesspool for rule breaking; half the concrete is covered in cigarette butts, glass shards, and other mysterious stains from other's unseemly activities that I'd rather stay unaware of. It's a wonder how none of the teachers look back here with how often students frequent this place.
Finally, the boy from English class (Kayden? Kenneth? It starts with a K sound, I know that much) appears, alongside a dozen other boys that I've seen hanging around Tyler. A few of them are unarmed, but most are carrying wooden bats. One guy has a pocket knife, so that's something at least.
"Hey fuckface!" The blonde boy yells. "You think you can mess with Tyler just because you think you're all high and mighty? Well, newsflash pal, you're not!"
"Yeah!" His entourage cheers him on.
This is comical. These guys attend a high school in the suburbs, and yet they're parading around like a bunch of wannabe gangsters. Did they rehearse their lines or something? Why does he talk like a movie bully from the 1950s? It's taking every fiber of my being not to burst out laughing right now.
"You made a big mistake pal, and we're gonna make you regret—"
"Fuck, alright!" I groan in annoyance. "Are we doing this or not?"
I stretch my arms, loosening myself up as they timidly inch closer, gripping their bats as if its enough to save them. This could be over in the blink of an eye if I want it to, but I promised Minji I would stop fighting, so I won't. Not exactly sure what that means, but I'm not exactly known for planning these things out.
I'm not a fighting expert by any stretch of the imagination, but I've been in enough to recognize certain patterns. Shaky eyes. Quivering breath. Their knuckles burning white as they clench their fists too hard to compensate for the fact that they have no idea what they're doing. With each step they take, it only becomes more apparent how downright terrified they are. I almost feel bad for them.
It's not like I wanted this either, but I brought this upon myself of my own volition. These guys could have said no and went about their day, living their regular high school lives, but instead, they're rallying behind some guy they're probably not close with just for a measly ounce of street cred they get for "showing their loyalty," effectively reducing themselves to lap dogs that get the "privilege" of calling themselves popular. I'm not doing this for street cred or privilege or any of that bullshit that they care too much about. I'm doing this because the asshole that they're rallying behind threatened my friend.
Inevitably, one of them gets brave enough to make the first move. He swings his bat, hollering at the top of his lungs, and misses wildly as I dodge to the side. The next guy gets lucky, breaking the old wood against my arm as I block the side of my head. My arm stings like hell, but I can't focus on that for too long before the rest of them start getting confident and lunging at me.
Even in the midst of the frenzy, as I dodge a swing aimed towards my head or suffer a kick to the stomach, all I can think about is Minji. I made a promise to her, one I have no intention of breaking. Rather than a fight between me and the dozens of Tyler's lackeys, it feels more like a fight between me and my instincts, actively trying to suppress the years of bad habits just for Minji. A part of me feels stupid for doing it—it's not like she'll ever see this anyways—yet I continue to subdue my instincts, even if it means sustaining a couple brutal blows to the body.
One of the bigger guys in the group tackles me to the ground, taking the wind out of me as my back collides with the hard concrete. My ears start to ring as he lands two solid punches to my cheek. I flail my hands wildly to the side, desperate for something to grab, before landing on a pile of broken glass. Ignoring the blood rushing to my palms, I chuck the shards at his face. He yelps in pain, allowing me to push him off and get back to my feet. Before I can even blink, my head begins to spin as another punch sends me careening towards the brick wall. Warm blood leaks through my lips, staining my shirt. Two more guys stand over me before hoisting me up by my arms.
I'm fucking exhausted. My vision is blurry and the ringing in my ears grows louder by the second. Each inhale burns just a bit hotter than the last. I'm covered in blood again, but this time, it's all my own. Every cell in my body screams at me for getting into this situation in the first place, berating me for my own stubbornness. Yet the blonde boy, Kyle or whatever the fuck his name is, stands in front of me unscathed, not even a drop of sweat on his brow. The rest of his buddies are on the ground, breathless and covered in injuries they got from tripping over each other. I cough out a weak chuckle, sending a jolt of pain through my chest.
"W-what the fuck are you laughing at?!" Even his threats are starting to get shaky.
"Just funny... You called me out here... Yet... You didn't do shit..." I mutter, spitting a glob of blood at his feet. "Fucking... coward..."
The fury ignites in his eyes, the same one present when he first called me out in English. He grabs a broken bat off the ground and swings it overhead, aiming for my face. This is it. Started this day off with a smile, and look where I'm at now. In the back of my mind, I always knew I would go out like this. It's a shame this had to happen after I finally found something to look forward to. With a shallow breath, my eyes flutter shut as I unwillingly accept my fate.
Suddenly, a loud siren blares through the air. The bat that was sailing towards my head mere seconds ago now clatters to the ground. Mr. Geier pops up from behind the building with a megaphone in his hand, alongside two teachers, Winter, Yujin, Danielle, and Minji.
"What the hell are you doing!? Put him down now!" Geier yells through the megaphone. I collapse to my knees as the two idiots drop me to the ground. A mix of emotions swirl through my head, but the sense of relief shines clearest through the storm. The fact that I'm alive almost makes everything feel more painful.
As the teachers reprimand the other guys, Minji and the others rush over to me, their overlapping voices of worry combined with the ringing in my ears making it impossible to make out anything. I want to tell them that it's fine, I made it out alive. In a shit ton of pain, but alive nonetheless. No words come out. My vision is starting to blur again. Minji's face is the last thing I see before everything turns to black.
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Minji's POV
I lean back in my chair, stretching my arms as I let out a long, exhausted sigh. It feels like no matter how much progress I make with prom, there's still a whole mountain of things I still need to do.
Danielle walks through the door of the student council room, carrying a pile of papers with her. I nearly burst into tears just looking at the size of the stack.
"Relax," she says reassuringly, reading my expression. "These are all taken care of."
I slide farther into my chair, releasing a deep breath. "Oh thank god, I don't think I can handle doing anymore paperwork."
She grins, taking a seat next to me. "The principal approved the caterers and our 'Red Carpet' theme, I informed the club leaders to start working on their floats for the prom parade, and Woohyuk and Julie from the art club agreed to paint a mural in the gym. All we have left to do is pick a venue, find a DJ, and prepare decorations."
"You say that like it's an easy thing to do." I sigh, resting my head on the table while Danielle merely shrugs her shoulders. A couple minutes of silence pass, both of us exhausted and overwhelmed by the ever growing pile of work. "Are Woohyuk and Julie dating?" I ask, making small talk.
"I think so. They seem to have gotten a lot closer after the school festival, and they wouldn't stop shooting each other heart eyes when I asked them to paint the mural. It was sickening," she jokes.
Dating in high school always felt like an enigma to me. Statistically speaking, only 20% of couples last until college, and only 10% ever get married. High schoolers are the most emotional, stubborn, immature, and hormonal people on the planet (according to my parents), why would you want to date someone like that? But it's not like I don't want to date... I just never had the chance to. I would be lying if I said I don't look at couples walking arm-in-arm through the halls with some kind of envy. Wouldn't it be nice to go through the struggles of your teen years with someone that understands you because they're going through the exact same thing? I say that, and then I look out the potential dating pool at Evergreen, only to be reminded of why I haven't dated anyone. I mean, there is one guy I wouldn't mind dating...
"Why do you ask?" Danielle says, interrupting my train of thought.
"U-uh nothing, just curious." My cheeks suddenly flare up with heat as she leans forward, scrutinizing my expression.
"Are you thinking about that boy again?
My eyes go wide as I shake my head profusely. "W-what, no! Why would I be thinking about Yuno?"
"Because I didn't even mention a name, yet your mind automatically went to Yuno." She raises her eyebrows in an 'I told you so' expression, causing me to shrink in my chair. "Are you really gonna fall for someone like that just because he saves your purse from a thief?"
"I told you I—Huh? How do you know about that?"
Danielle takes her phone out and pulls up a video from a local news account titled, "Heroic Man Stops Mall Purse Thief." My eyes grow even wider as the video plays, showing Yuno tackling the thief who stole my purse and the... awkward hug I gave him afterwards. Apparently, someone had recorded the entire altercation and uploaded it to social media. It now has...
"Five million views?!" I exclaim. That explains all the weird looks I've been getting today. I faceplant into the table, my face burning with a fire of a thousand suns. So that means the entire school saw me... hugging Yuno... I mean, why do I feel so embarrassed in the first place? Hugging is a perfectly normal way to show gratitude towards someone. He got my purse back, so a hug seems pretty normal, right? It's not like people are gonna assume we're dating. Not that I have any problem with dating him, it's just...
I let out a sigh. "Danielle..." I groan, my voice muffled by the table.
"Hm?" I feel her gently pat my shoulder in support. I lift my head, turning towards her.
"What do I do?"
She tilts her head at me, confused. "Do you want them to take the video down?"
"No, it's not that, it's... I don't know. I'm so lost. There's a lot going on with prom and my parents, it feels like I'm being tossed back and forth in a tornado with nothing around to hold onto for support. There's things that I want to do that seem so... impossible given the circumstances. I wish I could freeze time just so I could have a moment to myself to think." I slump back onto the table in defeat while Danielle continues to rub my shoulder.
Compared to the rest of the girls, Danielle is the most logical one. Hanni does everything she can to cheer me up, Haerin lends an ear and a shoulder to cry on no matter what, Hyein is always there to show me the brighter side of things, and Danielle is prepared with an easy 3-step solution to virtually any of my problems. If I'm drowning in a sea of doubt and anxiety, I know she'll be there with a spare life vest and an intricately made wooden raft to hoist me out of the water. But not even she has the answers to everything.
Suddenly, the door to the student council room swings open.
"We need help," a familiar voice shoots through the door. "Quickly."
Yuno's friends stand in the doorway panting, worry painted on their faces. Winter looks like she's on the verge of tears while Yujin's normally cheery disposition is hauntingly absent.
"What's wrong?" Danielle asks.
"I-I'm not sure, b-but I think h-he's in a fight right n-now, behind the g-gym," Winter stutters.
I hurriedly jump to my feet, my mind racing. "Danielle, Yujin, go get Principal Geier. Winter, come with me," I command, panic evident in my voice. The four of us promptly leave the student council room, with Danielle and Yujin diverging to the principal's office while Winter and I walk briskly towards the gym.
"Tell me everything. What do you mean Yuno might be in a fight?" I ask her.
"D-during English, Cameron w-went up to Yuno and he looked r-really angry. I-I couldn't hear everything th-they were saying, but it s-sounded like he told him to m-meet behind the gym during l-lunch," she explains. I pick up the pace, adrenaline pumping through my body. With each passing step, all I can think about is one thing.
Please be okay. Please be okay. Please be okay.
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As we turn the corner to the back of the gym, my heart sinks into the pit of my stomach while my breath gets completely sucked from my lungs. Two boys hold up Yuno's limp body as a third prepares to swing a stick straight towards his head. I wanna scream, I wanna run to him and make sure he's okay, but my entire body stays frozen in place. Why does it have to be Yuno? Why couldn't it be anyone else? I was just talking to him a few hours ago, he was fine. He was smiling. I wish I could see that smile on his face again. Please.
"Minji," Danielle softly calls out my name, wiping the tears off my face with concern in her eyes. I didn't even realize I was crying. She holds me as I uncontrollably sob into her shoulder, my heart aching with an indescribable pain. It feels like I'm being torn apart from the inside. I need him to be okay. Please.
"C'mon, let's go," she says, patting my arm. I look up from her shoulder, wiping away my tears, to see Yuno collapse to the floor. Mr. Geier and the other two teachers with us yell at the rest of the boys to line up against the wall using harsh language I've never heard him say before. The four of us get down by Yuno's side, desperate to make sure he's okay.
"H-he's fine, right? He'll be okay, right? Dani?" Yujin asks, his voice quivering as he looks up at her for reassurance.
"Just, um, give him some room to breathe for now."
"Y-Y-Y-Yuno..." Winter's entire body shakes as she weeps into her hands. I should comfort her. I'm the student council president, it's my responsibility to make sure everyone's okay. But my own tears won't stop flowing as I gently cup his cheek, swollen and red with cuts. You were awake earlier. Your eyes were open and you were smiling. Please wake up. Please smile again, Yuno. Please.
"We have to take him to the nurse, now!" Mr. Geier exclaims, grabbing Yuno by the arms. "Help me get his legs up!"
The three of them lift up his legs while I'm still too busy crying to help. My body is moving, following close behind them, but my mind is too muddled to properly process anything. The next few minutes are nothing but a blur of hallways and odd stares from students exiting the lunch room. I don't care. I don't care about what other students think of Yuno. I don't care about what my parents think of him. I don't care about what people at the banquet will think of him. All I care about is him and making sure that he's okay.
Once we arrive at the nurse's office, they gently lay his body on one of the cots. I sit down next to him, just staring at his face. His chest slowly rises and falls with breath. That's good. He's breathing. He's alive.
Mr. Geier says something to us that I can't quite make out. All of their voices fade into the background of my mind like nothing was ever said in the first place. Mr. Geier leaves, with Winter and Yujin following soon after. Danielle sits down next to me and says something, but I'm too distracted to listen right now. She ends up leaving soon too. All I can do is sit here and wait for him to wake up. Please wake up soon. Please.
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Yuno's POV
My eyes blink open to a blotchy field of grays and blacks. I try to sit up, but a stabbing pain shoots through my entire body. Every breath feels like hell to get through. Memories of what happened moments before I passed out come back to me. I almost got my skull busted open, and then there was this loud siren. I thought I saw Minji before I passed out, but I'm not too sure. Fuck, my body hurts like hell. Where am I anyways?
As my vision begins to focus, I see the familiar fluorescent lights of the school glaring back at me. I finally sit up, doing my best to ignore the pain in my back, and look around - the nurse's office. The school's nurse, a skinny woman with giant glasses and violently pink scrubs, sits at her desk and types away at her computer, oblivious to my consciousness. I consider saying something to let her know I'm awake, but my throat is too dry to produce any noise.
I turn to my left and my heart stops in my chest. Minji is lying on the cot next to me, sleeping peacefully. I start to wonder if this is all just another weird dream, but as I reach out and gently brush the hair from her face, the soft skin of her cheek feels too real. Even when she's sleeping, she's so beautiful. But... Why is she here?
"Oh good, you're awake," the nurse says, rising from her desk. I quickly retract my hand from Minji's face. "Principal Geier explained everything that happened. How are you feeling?"
I stretch my limbs, testing how much I can withstand the pain before it becomes unbearable. "Could be better, but I'm alive and breathing at least," I say. "Uh, what is she doing here? Did she get hurt?" My voice raises slightly as I gesture to Minji's sleeping form. If those fuckers did anything to her, I swear to God...
"I think she's fine. She came in with you and wouldn't move or speak, even after Principal Geier told the rest of the kids to get back to class. She just sat there, watching over you until she fell asleep," the nurse explains.
I sign in relief, thankful that she's not hurt, but the nurse's explanation only produces more questions. Why didn't she leave? I'm sure she's busy with a million other things, watching over me will only set her back even more. It's not like this is the first time this kind of thing has happened to me. Something similar happened right before I met Minji. I'll feel like shit for a few days, but I'm relatively fine.
So why did she stay?
The nurse pats my shoulder, handing me an ice bag. "I have to go, some kid threw up in the library, just put this wherever you feel like it. Will you and your girlfriend be fine here alone?"
Heat rushes to my cheeks. "She's not m—Uh, sure, we'll be fine."
She exits the room, leaving me alone with Minji. The silence gives me a moment to get my thoughts straight as the ice bag partially soothes my headache. Her face is so still and peaceful, I slow down my breaths despite the pain just so I don't wake her up. The last time I saw her face like this was when we slept in the same bed after she almost got attacked in front of the convenience store. My heart still burns with anger at the thought of Minji nearly getting hurt. I want to protect her. Even if she doesn't feel the same, I want to be there for her in any way I can. In the short time I've known Minji, it feels like I'm becoming a better person, or maybe I'm just becoming more and more foolish. I don't know. Feelings are confusing.
Minji's eyes suddenly flutter open, and as soon as they meet mine, she jumps up, wrapping her arms around me in a tight embrace. "Y-you're awake! Oh my god, you're awake!" She sobs into my shoulders. I completely freeze in her arms, the surprise overtaking the pain.
"Y-yeah, I'm fine, Minji. Are you okay?" I ask, awkwardly patting her back. She separates from me, tears overflowing from her eyes. With each drop that falls, I feel my heart crack into a billion pieces, this pain worse than anything I've ever felt before. Hesitantly, I wipe away her tears with my uninjured hand, making sure my movements are gentle.
"H-hey, it's okay. What's wrong?" She takes a moment to calm down, sinking her cheek into my palm as she controls her breathing. I don't dare move my hand, even after most of the tears stop flowing.
"I-I was... so worried... that y-you wouldn't... wake up..." She stutters in between sniffles. "I-I thought you w-were... th-thought you were... dea—"
"I'm okay, Minji," I interrupt her, afraid she'll start bawling again if she finishes her sentence. "U-um, please stop crying. I'm okay."
She takes one more deep breath before sitting back down, regretfully moving my hand from her cheek. We sit in silence for a while, unsure of what to say. She cried after getting attacked by the convenience store, but this time seems different. This time, she wasn't crying for her, she was crying for me.
"Wait here," Minji mutters before getting up and walking over to the sink in the corner of the room. I watch silently as she pulls out a few things from the cupboard and fiddles with the sink for a moment before walking back over to me. She gently places a bowl of water and a hand towel next to me before taking out a juice box and poking a straw through the top.
"Here." She brings the straw to my lips, making me flinch slightly.
"Oh. Thanks." I take it from her, drinking it as she dips the towel into the water and gently tends to my cut up hand. My body recoils from her touch more than the pain itself. It still feels foreign to me, being cared for like this. Never in a million years did I imagine someone like Minji Kim to pop into my life. She's way too good for me. What good would I be as her boyfriend? What good am I as her friend for that matter? I don't want to be a nuisance in her life. I want—No, I need to be better. For her.
She finishes wrapping the gauze around my hand. "Is that okay? Not too tight?" She asks, her voice slightly hoarse from crying.
"Yeah, it's fine. Thanks." I look at her, meeting her eyes. "You didn't have to do this. You should've just left—"
"Why did you get into another fight? I thought you said you wouldn't fight anymore." Her tone turns stern, softly reprimanding my decisions.
"I didn't fight," I assure her. "If I didn't show up, they were gonna go after Winter, but I promise, I didn't try to hit them or anything."
"So you just let them beat you up!?" Minji shoots me a look of disbelief, tears welling up in her eyes.
"N-no! I-I dodged and stuff, they just got a few lucky hits in!" I hastily try to explain myself, hoping she doesn't cry again. In hindsight, it sounds even more stupid when I say it out loud. I went to the back of the gym, fully expecting there to be a crowd of people wanting to kick my ass, and the only plan I had was to... not fight? Even if I did make it out fine, did I just expect Minji not to say anything about the sudden abundance of injuries all over my body? God, I'm such a dumbass.
"Why didn't you tell anyone!? A-a teacher!? Principal Geier!? Me!?" The look of outrage alone is enough to make me feel like a child getting scolded by their parents. My gaze falls to the ground, hiding my embarrassed blush.
"I, uh... I didn't think of that..." I shamefully admit. She sits next to me, sighing into her hands. Seconds stretch into entire years as tense silence overtakes the room. Even my own breathing feels comparable to a car engine with how quiet everything is.
My entire body freezes as I feel Minji rest her head on my shoulder. Her silky black hair tickles my neck while the scent of her lavender perfume wafts through my nose, giving me visions of running through a clear field full of nothing but lavender stems. "Do you know why I'm mad at you?" She asks, her voice surprisingly mild.
"Uh, because I'm... stupid?"
She chuckles lightly at my half-joke. "You're not stupid. What you did was stupid, but no, that's not why I'm mad."
"Because, uh... I didn't talk to you first?"
"Bingo." She lifts her head up to look at me. Her face is close, I can feel the warmth emanating from her soft cheeks. "I know you wanted to protect Winter, but you ended up getting hurt in the process. If you had just gone to a teacher, those boys would've been reprimanded without you having to get hurt."
"They would not have been reprimanded—"
"Okay, fine, they probably wouldn't have been seriously reprimanded without any solid evidence," she concedes. "But that doesn't mean you should go through these kinds of things alone. Your friends were worried sick about you. And I..." Her voice cracks like delicate porcelain. "...I was worried sick about you."
I gulp, finally feeling the weight of my actions. For years, everything I've done has only affected me. I never had to second guess anything. But things are different now. I have people around me that care about my well-being, which means all of my actions have some kind of effect on them. This whole thing sprouted from me wanting to protect a friend, but in the end, they got hurt because of me.
"I'm sorry, Minji. For being stupid and not talking to you and letting myself get hurt."
She nods, offering an appreciative grin. "Next time something like this happens, just text me first so I can at least try to talk you out of it, okay?"
How could I ever say no to a face like that? "Okay."
Minji's smile widens, and like a mirror, I can feel my own lips curling to reflect her joy. She's so... amazing, unreal even—like someone plucked a princess straight from a fairy tale and placed her right in front of me. Kind, caring, courteous, beautiful, strong, intelligent, absolutely perfect in every way possible that it almost feels unfair. I might be fated for nothing more than an early grave, but for once, I want to defy fate and entertain the possibility that something good could happen to me. Maybe Minji is the good thing that happened to me, and maybe, just maybe, there is a future where me and her... y'know.
A whole minute passes before I realize that neither of us have stopped staring at each other. Something in my head clicks. I find myself leaning in, inch by inch, closer to Minji's lips, just like I've done many times in my dreams—but this time, it's real. Her breath dances against my skin, making my cells tingle in anticipation. Something in her expression shifts. Her eyes widen slightly, flickering downwards every so often, but she doesn't pull away, even after my intentions become crystal clear. She opens her mouth as if to say something, a protest maybe, but no sound comes out except for her shivering breath. My heart pounds in my ears like a warning alarm telling me to stop. "This is a bad idea, Yuno! What are you doing!?" Yet I continue onward until the tension is palpable. So close, I can almost taste it.
The door to the nurse's office swings open. "Oh good, you're both awake!"
Minji and I jump to opposite sides of the cot, my face burning hotter than the sun. The nurses waltzes in with another kid sporting a gross vomit stain on his shirt, tossing any kind of sentiment I had mere moments ago out the window. My heart chugs with the force of a speeding bullet train; it's a miracle I haven't succumbed to a heart attack by now.
"U-um, I should, um..." Minji stutters frantically, her eyes darting everywhere but in my direction. If it's any consolation, I feel too overwhelmed to look at anywhere except the floor. She hurries out of the nurse's office without uttering another word.
"What's up with her?" The nurse asks. I'm too busy freaking out to even register her question properly.
What the fuck did I just try to do.
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Minji's POV
Oh my god. Oh... my god. Ohhhhhh. My god. OH. MY. GOD.
"Minj? Are you alright?"
I jump in my seat, my gaze flying wildly around me. "H-huh?"
Hanni and Haerin exchange odd glances as they take their seats on either side of me. "Girl, what's wrong with you?" Hanni asks, her eyebrow raised in concern.
"I-I'm fine, just working on prom stuff like usual." That's only somewhat of a lie: after getting permission to excuse myself from the rest of the day's classes, I came into the student council room with the intent to work on prom stuff to get my mind off of... that. However, I ended up spending the last hours of the school day staring at my blank computer screen while my mind spirals out of control. "Where's Danielle and Hyein?" I ask, changing the subject.
"Home stuff," Hanni answers, sliding an iced coffee towards me. "Are you sure you're fine? You look... shaky."
"It's probably just stress, you know how I've been lately," I awkwardly chuckle. Caffeine is probably the last thing that I need right now, yet I take a sip to keep up appearances. Haerin's cold, analyzing glare seems to notice this.
"Mmm..." She grumbles to herself, her gaze never leaving mine as she takes a notebook from her backpack and starts to scribble in it. Haerin always had a knack for knowing things before they happen, but not even she could've possibly known about the nurse's office... right?
"Ugh, all this talk about prom is making me sick," Hanni groans. "Spending over $1000 on hair, makeup, a dress, and a limo, all for what? Three hours of some sweaty boy's hands on my waist? I think I'll pass."
"You can think that, but some people wait their entire lives for this one magical night. I just want to make sure everyone has fun," I reason.
"Pfft, you just want to slow dance with your little boyfriend, Yuno."
The shock from her words makes me choke on my drink, devolving into a mad coughing fit. "What?! N-no I don't! He's not my—shut up!" Hanni throws her head back in laughter, clearly amused by my near death experience at her hands.
With how insanely stressful prom preparations have been, the thought of procuring a date to the event never crossed my mind. At this point in the year, most people have found potential dates to take or a close group of friends to go with, with Danielle, Hanni, and I falling into the latter. All this time, I never even thought what prom would be like for myself. I've seen it all the time in movies and TV shows: the main character boy asks the hot cheerleader girl to prom, they slow dance together to a popular song fitting of the time, they kiss, credits roll. A simple, predictable formula riddled with a mess of cliches, but one that many dream about for their own special night. But what did I want out of prom? Would he even want to...
Nevermind. I can't even think clearly about that right now.
Haerin tosses her notebook over to me. "I drew this," she states.
I peer down at her drawing, growing more confused with each second. It seems to depict some kind of misshapen blob and a... girl? I think? They're sitting on some kind of bench really close together. Haerin never showed any interest in the arts before this, so why would she be into drawing all of a sudden?
"Um, it's nice? I think? What is it supposed to be?" I ask.
"It's you kissing a shadow monster."
My arm lurches wildly to the side, inadvertently tossing her notebook across the room. Does she know? How does she know!? She wasn't there, right? Right!?
"That wasn't very nice, Minj," Hanni chides, picking the notebook off the ground. "I think it's very unique and has a lot of character. She even got your ponytail right. Good job, Kitty Kang." She pats Haerin's head, bringing a pleased smile out of her, yet her eyes stay glued to me like a predator stalking its prey. I'm starting to wonder if she ever even blinks.
"Sorry, Haerin, I just feel out of it today. It's a, uh... lovely drawing," I sigh, resting my head onto my palm.
"Yah, you're bumming me out, Minj. Let's do something fun instead of all this prom garbage. Karaoke?" Hanni suggests. They both look at me expectantly, which only makes my answer even more painful.
"I would love to, especially today out of all days, but I have to prepare for a banquet tomorrow."
"A banquet? You never told us about that. Ooh, can we come?" Hanni pleads, flashing her big eyes and pouty lips.
"I, um... It's for my family's business. They said I couldn't invite anyone, sorry." Oh god. Lying to my parents is one thing, but lying to my best friends? The people I trust more than anybody in the entire world? My own words leave a bitter taste in my mouth, more bitter than the strongest black coffee. But what am I supposed to tell them? That I invited Yu—him instead of my own closest friends? Even if his presence serves some kind of purpose, I still can't imagine how they would react if I told them I basically chose a boy over them. No matter how I try to justify it, it still feels wrong.
"Aww," Hanni pouts. While she's distracted, I notice Haerin picking up her notebook and pointing at the "shadow monster" in her drawing with a scrutinizing squint. I try to ignore her, keeping a straight face, but it's becoming more clear that she knows something's up.
"I'll make it up to you guys some other time," I say, gathering my things. "Next time we go to karaoke, I'll pay for everything, snacks, drinks, whatever, alright?"
"Woo! I won't say no to that!" Hanni cheers, skipping out of the student council room. I get up to follow her, but a tug on my sleeve stops me. Haerin stares at me blankly, unblinking, for what feels like forever. It's normally hard to read her, but especially now when my mind has been in a constant whirlwind for the last couple hours, all I can come to are a few thousand anxiety-ridden conclusions. She suddenly moves her hand upwards with the focused intensity of a cat, waving it around before finally landing her index finger on the middle of my forehead.
"U-um, Haerin, what are you—"
"You're overthinking things. Go with your gut," she states before putting her notebook back into her bag like nothing ever happened.
"What are you talking about—"
"If you're not gonna admit it to us, at least admit it to yourself. It's not healthy to keep things bottled up, you're barely floating as it is." Haerin goes up to the door, stopping to look back at me. "Are you coming with us or not?"
"Uh, right, yeah." I can barely process her words as I follow the two of them off campus. What does she mean by "overthinking"? I'm not overthinking. I'm thinking a perfectly healthy amount. I just have a lot on my plate, so there's a lot I need to think about. That's not overthinking, that's just... thinking a lot. I need to be thinking a lot, or else I run the risk of letting a ton of people down. My parents, the entire student body, my friends. Once I get a quiet moment to myself, I'll be fine. Right? Right?
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I kick off my shoes by the front door, ready to land face first into my bed and turn off my brain for a couple hours. Unfortunately, fate has other plans for me.
"Minji! Welcome home, dear!" My mom announces from the living room, her tone a bit too cheerful to not raise any immediate red flags. "How was school?"
I fight back an exhausted sigh. "It was fine, Mother. I'm just gonna go up to my room and—"
"Oh, well don't go upstairs yet! The Parks are here, come say hello!"
The Parks are what!? My eyes shoot up, scanning the living room. Mr. and Mrs. Park sit on the sofa, offering me kind smiles. But if they're here, does that mean...
"Minji! Long time no see!" My worst nightmare rounds the corner with my father in tow, laughing like they're old buddies or something. My skin crawls as he walks towards me with his arm spread out like he's about to hug me. I wanna run and hide, but I'm too terrified to move. In the end, all I can do is try not to vomit on his shoulder as he wraps me up in an awkward hug.
Is this real? Surely this isn't real, right? Maybe this is all just some sick nightmare and I'm still sleeping in the nurse's office. Please let this be just a nightmare.
"Cat got your tongue or something?" He jokes, finally releasing me from his grasp.
"Sunghoon, it's uh... good to see you."
Father walks up and clasps his hand on Sunghoon's shoulder. "Sunghoon was just telling me that he's considering transferring over Evergreen for the rest of the school year. Isn't that great, Minji?"
"He WHAT!?"
Everyone turns to look at me, shock and concern written all over their faces. "I-I mean what a great surprise! That's just... so, so, sooo great to hear," I say through bared teeth. "I have an, uh, important test tomorrow that I need to study for, so I'm just gonna go up to my room and—"
"Why don't you bring Sunghoon with you, dear?" Mother suggests, oblivious to the fact that she's slowly destroying my life. "It'll give you two time to catch up without us adults getting in the way."
I muster up the most convincing smile I can and say, "S-sure. That would be great. Just... great."
I stomp up the stairs to my room with Sunghoon in tow, immediately collapsing onto my bed without giving him a second thought.
"Your room is nice," he says, shutting the door behind him and effectively taking away my only way of escape. Maybe there's some soft bushes I can land on if I jump out the window. If not, at least death seems more favorable than being stuck in here with the worst human being alive.
"Mhm," I mutter, half-listening to whatever he has to say.
Sunghoon paces around my room, looking around at my posters and my desk before picking up Mr. Bear from my bed. "I see you're still into teddy bears," he chuckles to himself.
"Put that down!" I grab Mr. Bear from his grasp and glare coldly at him, causing him to back off with his hands up.
"Alright, it's clear that there's still some bitterness so I might as well just go ahead and address the elephant in the room: I'm sorry for the way I treated you when we were kids. I was an immature little brat and I should've treated you better. Will you forgive me?"
That was... surprisingly mature. Did the original Sunghoon die in an accident and got replaced by a nicer clone? Does he have an illegitimate twin brother that replaced him and took his name after Mr. and Mrs. Park realized how much of a gremlin their son is? Any of those explanations seem more plausible than Sunghoon actually maturing.
"Uh... sure, I guess," I say, still weirded about this sudden revelation. He grins at me, sitting next to me on the bed. "Um, I'm sorry for yelling. It's been a, uh... long day."
"No worries, I deserved it." Jeez, this new understanding side of Sunghoon is so off putting. If he acted like old self, at least that would be predictable. This feels like walking through uncharted territory without so much as a map or even a flashlight.
"Your mother told me that you're inviting a friend to the banquet tomorrow," he continues. "Some guy named Yuno. What's he like?
"He's..." Oh god, I can't even think properly about him right now after what happened in the nurse's office. I still haven't been able to process my own feelings about it. What was he thinking? What was I thinking? I can't even remember where my mind was during that whole thing, yet I can remember everything else so vividly; his warm breath dancing against my skin, his kind eyes peering into mine with so much care behind them, his soft lips inching closer and closer.
"Minji? Are you alright?" Sunghoon nudges my shoulder, taking me out of my impromptu trip down memory lane. I sink my face into Mr. Bear's head, hiding the growing blush on my cheeks.
"Y-yeah, I'm fine. Like I said, long day," I reason. "Um... He's nice. A little shy, but he means well."
"Are you sure you two are friends?" He chuckles at me. "It doesn't seem like you know him very well."
"We, uh, haven't been friends very long," I explain. As weird as it is, Yuno and I have only known each other a couple of days, yet it feels like so much longer than that. Now that I think about it, we've run into each other everyday since we met, even on the weekend. For the past three years of attending the same high school, he's been nothing but a body walking through the hall or the utterance of a name whenever he stirred up trouble, but now, we're so intertwined in each other's lives like he's been there from the start. Without him, I probably would've gotten attacked by that drunk man and I never would've gotten over my fear of spiders. His presence has become so integral to my life, I can't imagine him not being there in some way.
"Do you like him?" Sunghoon asks suddenly, glancing at me.
I... I don't know. I don't know what to think or feel about him. He is a part of my life, but I just... I don't know. "As a friend, yeah," I utter, unsure of the words coming out of my own mouth.
He nods, grinning to himself. "Good."
"What do you mean 'good'?" My eyebrows furrow in confusion.
"Oh, nothing, just, uh... thinking out loud." He gets up from my bed and walks towards the door. "I'll let you study for your test now, I'd hate to interfere with your academics. See ya tomorrow, Minji."
"Yeah, see ya..." He shuts the door behind him, leaving me alone with my thoughts. Instead of getting up and doing something productive to distract myself, all I can do is lie there and stare at the ceiling, wondering when everything became so complicated.
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Yuno's POV
"Yuno, are you okay? You're blanking out again," Winter says.
"Hm? Oh, it's nothing. Just a little headache," I utter.
Honestly, I would prefer it if it was just a little headache rather than the fucking tornado that's been running rampant through my mind. During the entire walk from the school to the convenience store, all I could do was stare at the ground and let my legs blindly follow behind Winter and Yujin. Hell, I barely even noticed we came to the convenience store until just now.
"Shouldn't you go to the doctor? You don't look very good," Yujin says.
"I've been through worse." Both of them still stare at me, unconvinced of my wellbeing. "I'll feel better after I sleep it off, alright? You guys don't have to worry about me."
"How can we not worry about you, you got hurt b-because of me..." Winter's voice falters as tears begin to well within her eyes.
"Ah jeez. Look, I..." My mind wanders back to what Minji said to me in the nurse's office before I did... that: But that doesn't mean you should go through these kinds of things alone. Your friends were worried sick about you.
"I'm sorry. To both of you. I should've let you two know what was going on instead of running in alone and letting myself get hurt. It won't happen again, okay? I'm done fighting," I say. Both of them look up at me in surprise.
"So no more Super Yuno?" Yujin asks.
"Uh yeah. No more, uh, 'Super Yuno'." If there's a silver lining in any of this, it's definitely getting rid of that ridiculous nickname.
"Hmm..." Yujin grows silent, his gaze pensive. "When superheroes in comic books get hurt, they usually have some kind of healing factor or revival ability that helps them get back up no matter how much damage they take. But you..." He looks up at me, his own eyes glossy with sorrow. "...You're real. You don't have any superpowers to help you. It was really scary seeing you not wake up, Yuno. I-I don't... I don't want to see you get hurt anymore."
"Me neither," Winter adds.
The three of us sit in silence with nothing but the crickets and the gentle howl of the passing breeze to let us know the world is still moving. The weight of their words sink deeper into me, making me feel even more guilty for my lack of consideration. Things are different now. I can't act like I'm still living the same life I was a couple days ago, and frankly, I don't want to go back to that life of solitude and pain. I need to change for the better. For me. For my dad. For my friends. For Min... For her.
I clap Yujin on the back, ruffling his hair. "You guys won't have to see me get hurt anymore, alright? I really am done fighting."
Winter smiles at me, wiping the tears from her eyes. "I'm glad."
"Me too," Yujin chuckles.
My lips form into a grin, a feeling I'm starting to get used to. "But if anyone messes with either of you, I don't mind coming out of retirement for a little bit."
The sounds of their laughter float with the wind, carried wherever fate takes them. I always viewed fate as cruel and unyielding, rendering our sense of choice to nothing but dust. But every once in a while, it'll surprise me with something new, not necessarily good or bad, just different. This, however, is good. Unequivocally good. It can be convoluted and annoying at times, but still good.
"How's the student council president?" Winter asks, making my shoulders tense up suddenly.
"Oh yeah, she looked really worried about you. Danielle told me that she's never seen her act like that before," Yujin says.
My gaze drifts to the side, unable to meet their eyes. "U-uh, she's fine. We talked. We're, uh, cool." I can't even imagine how she must be feeling right now after I did all that. What am I supposed to say to her? Do I just pretend like nothing happened? That I didn't just try to kiss her? Out of nowhere? I clutch my head as I devolve into another tumultuous storm of uncertainty and anxiety. I need to get this feeling out of me. I need to... I...
"I almost kissed her," I blurt out. Winter and Yujin's jaws drop in utter shock at my confession. My entire face burns with shame, but my soul feels lighter now that I finally acknowledged it.
"Uh, what do you mean almost?" Winter asks after several seconds of stunned silence.
"I-I, uh... Fuck..." I inhale deeply, steadying my breath. "We were just talking and then suddenly her face was really close and I kinda just... leaned in... uh..." The more I blabber, the warmer my entire body feels, yet going back and reliving that moment so clearly feels oddly nice in a way. Instead of it being a dream, it was real. I almost got to see what happens at the end of that dream instead of waking up in my bed.
Both of them lean in with amused smirks, completely intrigued by my stupid little accident. "Do you like her?" Winter asks.
"Y-yeah, I do. A lot."
"Aw, look at him, he's blushing," Yujin teases.
"Ugh, shut up." I turn my head, hiding my face into my hands.
"I think it's very cute that you have a crush on her. Minji seems like a really nice girl," Winter says, amused. "Are you gonna ask her out to prom?"
"I, uh... I don't know."
"Why not? I think you should go for it if you really like her."
"I don't know how she feels about me. I mean, I know she thinks of us as friends, but more than that..." I sigh, my shoulders slumping towards the ground. "Minji has a lot going for her, and I'm just me."
"How did she react when you almost kissed her?" Yujin asks.
"She, uh... She ran out of the room in a panic."
Both of them turn to each other in contemplation. "Well, that could mean anything," Winter says. "Regardless of what you think she feels, you should ask her out or else you're gonna regret it for the rest of your life. I didn't think Karina would ever like me, but look where we're at now."
"Yeah, Yuno!" Yujin adds. "We'll even help you with your promposal! I can make posters and—"
"No!" I interject. "No posters. I don't want to make a big deal out of it. I already know what people think of me, so to put that kind of attention on her would be cruel."
Amused smirks grow on their faces as they exchange knowing glances at each other. "That was really sweet, Yuno," Winter says, gushing.
On second thought, maybe it's better if I didn't tell them all of this; God knows I won't hear the end of it for the next week. But as I look at the sincerity in their smiles, a warm feeling stirs within me. Maybe it's better I did.
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My hand rests on the doorknob of my home, frozen by the impending dread of having to come clean and explain the sudden influx of cuts and bruises marking my body. If he's going to be in my life again, he'll have to deal with the fact that I made and will continue to make really shitty mistakes. I just hope I'm able to learn from them every once in a while.
With a deep breath, I enter my home to find him sitting alone at the dining table, his leg bouncing restlessly as he stares blankly at nothing. All the lights in the house are off, save for the single one floating right above him, creating an ominous tension that blasts me from the doorway.
"Uh, hey, Dad."
"Yuno!" I expected anger, disappointment, maybe even disgust, but instead I'm met with relief as he walks over to me, placing his hand on my shoulder. "Your principal called me earlier, I was worried sick about you. Are you okay?
"Yeah, I'm fine." I thought I would get tired of reiterating for the umpteenth time that I'm fine, but having people around me that care enough to worry gives me this tingling feeling in my chest. It feels... nice, actually.
"Are you getting bullied at school?" He asks worriedly.
"No, it's nothing like that. It was just a stupid fight." Some could argue that I'm the bully at the school, and maybe they're right, but at least I pick on people that deserve it instead of defenseless underclassmen.
"Do you need me to take you to the hospital or something?"
"I'm fine, I've been through worse. Just need a little rest," I say. He begins to speak, but stops and sighs instead.
"Alright. Just let me know if you need anything, okay?" I nod. "I trust you know how to take care of yourself by now, but I'm always gonna be here if you need me." He walks over to the kitchen and pours himself a cup of water, but instead stares pensively at it, watching his reflection in the cup.
"Actually, I could use a ride after school tomorrow," I say. "I was, uh, invited to a banquet."
He looks up from the cup, his brow raised in curiosity. "Really? What for?"
"Minji—the girl you met at the mall—she invited me," I explain.
My dad smirks, finally showing a positive emotion for the first time since I got home. "Sure thing, I can drive you."
"Thanks, dad." I grin at him before heading upstairs to my room.
The easy parts are over. I apologized to Winter and Yujin, and accidentally let my feelings for Minji slip out. I talked to my dad and he seemed to take things better than I thought he would. Now there's just one person left I have to talk to, arguably the most important I need to talk to: Minji.
I stare at my phone, my eyes rereading our previous texts over and over again. Should I call her? What would I even say? Even texting her seems like an impossible feat at this point. After she freaked out and ran out of the nurse's office, I've been struggling to think of how I should address the incident. Hell, I've been struggling on how I should feel about it myself. I did, technically, want it to happen, but couldn't I have chosen a more opportune moment to do it? Y'know, like after knowing for sure what she feels about me? God, I'm a fucking idiot.
To add salt to the wound, I end up going for the coward's way out, typing up a message that avoids the issue entirely because acting like everything is fine is surely the best course of action.
Yuno: Hi. What should I wear to the banquet? And what's the address?
Feelings are so exhausting.
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Compared to how "eventful" yesterday was, Tuesday went by in the blink of an eye. The weird stares were still there, even more so thanks to my injuries, and Tyler's group of friends in English class seemed to be down a couple of guys. Not my problem anyhow. Just less trouble for me and it's not like I even hit any of them.
Minji never responded to the text I sent last night. To make matters worse, every time I saw her in the hallway, she avoided eye contact completely and ran the opposite direction. If she told me that what I did was disgusting and to never talk to her again, I would at least understand, but to avoid me completely when I'm literally going to a banquet with her feels like cruel and unusual punishment.
I sigh, banging my head into my locker. Not the greatest decision given my condition, but I don't give a shit anymore. I just want the girl I like to talk to me.
"Is she still avoiding you?" Winter asks.
"Yeah," I utter sadly. "Maybe I messed up. Maybe she doesn't want to be friends anymore."
Yujin pats my shoulder in support. "Don't worry about it, Yuno, you'll get a chance to talk to her eventually. Didn't you say you were going to that banquet with her tonight? You can talk to her then!"
"She hasn't even given me the address, how am I supposed to get there?" I reason. "Maybe this is her way of telling me not to come."
Winter and Yujin exchange worried glances while I lean against my locker, thinking about everything and nothing. Is this what it feels like to have something good ripped away from you all of a sudden? It sucks. It fucking sucks. Part of me wishes I never met Minji in the first place just so I never have to feel like this.
Just then, Minji's tall friend walks past, offering a polite wave. What's her name again? It starts with an H... Not Hanni... Harry... Halsey... Hyemi...
"Hyein!" I call out, rushing over to her.
"Hello, Minji's friend!" she says. "What's up?"
"Have you talked to Minji at all today?"
"Of course I have!" She smiles like it's the most obvious thing in the world. "Why?"
"Has she, um, said anything about me?" I may sound feeble and desperate, but that's because I am. If Minji hates my guts, then I need to know, or else I'm gonna be walking around like a hopeless idiot.
"Hmm... No, I don't think she's said anything about you."
"Oh..." I hang my head, completely dejected. "Well, next time you see her, can you ask her to check her texts? She hasn't given me a response yet."
"Why can't you tell her yourself? Did something happen between you two?" Hyein squints at me.
"N-no! I mean..." You tried to kiss her, you dumbass. "...maybe. I don't know. Can you tell her that I want to talk? Please."
"Hmm..." She studies my expression with an intense glare. "Okay, but I can't promise anything. Whatever you did must've upset her a lot if she's not talking to you all of a sudden."
I sigh, feeling my heart being ripped out of my chest. "Yeah, I figured. Thanks." With my gaze fixed on the ground, I trudge back to my locker where Winter and Yujin are waiting. I wanna bash my head into the metal door so I can stop feeling like this, but I can't even muster up the energy to do that. If only I didn't catch a stupid crush on her. A stupid, hopeless, foolish crush.
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Minji's POV
Schoolwork. Study. Test. Prom. Schoolwork. Study. Test. Prom. Schoolwork. Study. Test. Prom. I feel like a robot running through a constant cycle to maintain peak productivity. I've accomplished so much in the day that I don't even have time to think about anything else. With prom slowly approaching, my continuous cycle of work will eventually pay off and everyone will finally be happy.
The door to the student council room clicks open, but I don't even flinch. Eyes are glued to the screen, typing up emails and researching venues until calluses form on my fingers.
"Uh, Minji?" I hear Danielle's voice ask. "What are you doing in here with the lights off?"
Oh right. The lights are off. I didn't even notice. The blue light from my laptop has burned itself into my retinas. Even when I blink, all I see is the screen.
"Just working," I mutter.
"Hey, girl," Hanni says, concern laced in her tone. "We got you an iced coffee if you want it."
"Thanks." I take a sip, the caffeine having an immediate effect on me like adding coal to the furnace of a speeding steam train. Email sent. New tab opened up. Check notification. Look at potential venues. Don't think. Just work.
A hand slams my laptop shut. "Hey! What are you—" I look up for the first time to see all of my friends looking down at me with worry all over their faces.
"I told you keeping things bottled up isn't healthy," Haerin states, her hand holding my laptop closed.
"W-what are you talking about?" I ask, annoyed. "Can't you see I'm trying to work!?"
"Minj, look at yourself! This isn't just stress anymore, you look like a zombie!" Hanni exclaims.
I scoff, rubbing my hands over my face. "I'm fine, I'm just working on prom like usual. Haerin, give me back my—" I reach for my laptop, but Haerin snatches it away. "Haerin, what are you doing!? I'm in the middle of something important!"
"Minji, what is going on with you?" Danielle asks in a calm yet concerned tone. "You've been acting weird ever since yesterday."
I feel like my head is about to explode. What are they not understanding!? Of course I'm going to be mad, they just took away my laptop! If anything, they're acting weird! "I told you guys, I'm fine!"
"Is this about what happened between you and Yuno?" Hyein asks from the corner of the room. My gaze shoots towards her. Her hands are trembling by her sides like leaves in a heavy storm, barely holding onto the branch they're a part of. Tears threaten to burst from her eyes. She's scared, terrified. Of me.
My legs give out from underneath me as my vision becomes blurry with tears. A blanket of warmth covers me as the girls hold me in their gentle embrace. I don't deserve them. I've been lying and keeping secrets from them, and now I yelled at them. All for what? A boy? Have I lost sight of what really matters in my life just because I think I have feelings for someone?
It takes a while for me to come down from the overwhelming wave of emotions. By the time my tears stop, I find myself surrounded by my friends' caring gazes. The four people I trust most in the world, but also the ones I need to apologize to.
"I'm sorry guys," I begin. "I know I said I've been stressed, but that doesn't excuse my outburst. You guys don't deserve to be yelled at like that."
Hanni tenderly brushes my hair with her fingers, letting me rest my head on her shoulder. "It's okay, Minj, we know you didn't mean it. We're just really worried about you."
"Yeah," Danielle adds. "It's clear that this isn't just about prom anymore."
"What did Yuno do to you?" Hyein asks.
"He didn't, um..." I take a deep breath, steadying my heartbeat. "When he got into that fight yesterday, it really scared me. Seeing him pass out like that, I was terrified that he wasn't going to wake up. It felt like I couldn't breathe properly until I knew he was alright. All I could think about was 'Why did this have to happen to him? It's so unfair. He doesn't deserve this at all'. When Yuno finally woke up, it was like... everything felt right again. I was so relieved. And then I looked into his eyes and thought 'I never want to see you get hurt again'. And I..." My cheeks start to burn as my voice falters. The girls begin to stare at me with intrigue, waiting for me to finish my sentence.
"I-I... I almost kissed him."
The room fills with collective gasps as each of them freeze in shock. I bury my face into Hanni's shoulder, each passing second of silence making me feel even more embarrassed.
"W-what do you mean almost?" Danielle asks, the most disturbed out of the four of them.
"The nurse came in before we could, uh... finish," I say, my voice muffled by Hanni's shirt.
"OH. MY. GOD." Hanni squeals. "Girl, tell us everything! Who initiated? What did he say to you? Did he go right or left—" Haerin clasps her hand over Hanni's mouth, shaking her head disapprovingly. Thank god, I don't know how much longer I could've taken her questions.
"Is that why you were avoiding him all day?" Hyein asks.
I sigh, nodding sadly. "Every time I saw him, I panicked and ran away like an idiot," I admit. "I don't know what to think or how to feel."
"Do you like him?"
I stare at the ground in contemplation, thinking about the past few days with Yuno. Despite what others think of him, he's proven himself to be kind hearted and loyal, oftentimes putting his friends above his own well being. He's saved me countless times, never once asking for any sort of recompense, and he's shown that he's willing to change for the better, even if it might go against his own ideas of justice. Yuno is a good guy, a great friend, and...
"Yeah," I nod. "I think I do like him."
"You think?" Danielle asks, unconvinced.
"I don't know, I've never had a crush on anybody before."
"Minj, that is so cute!" Hanni chimes. "You should ask him to prom!"
"Shouldn't he ask me...?"
Haerin shakes her head. "It's 2024, subjecting yourself to outdated ideals will only leave you disappointed. Get with the times, grandma."
I side-eye her, grimacing at her insult. "Whatever. I don't even know if he feels the same and I'd rather not do something drastic to ruin our friendship."
"But you'll never know if you don't try,' Hanni says. "You're gonna regret it if you don't tell him how you feel."
"I know, but I can't just rush into something like this without thinking first," I argue. "Besides, I'm busy with a thousand things right now, I don't even think I have time for a relationship."
Danielle takes my hand in hers, looking me in the eye. "You should do what makes you happy, Minji. I mean, look what happened when you bottled up everything inside and put other people's feelings above your own. Forget everyone else right now and focus on your own happiness for once."
"But—"
"No buts," she snaps. "I can get the other student council members to pick up the slack on prom preparations, so go out, have fun, and date a stupid boy. And if he hurts you, then you have the four of us to fall back on." The others nod in agreement, smiling brightly at me.
"Thanks, guys." I quickly clap my hands over my eyes in an attempt to stop another onslaught of tears. "God, I feel like I'm gonna cry again."
"Aww, you big softie," Hanni says. "Come here."
The four of them pull me into a warm group hug that melts all my worries away. Honest to God, I don't know what I would do without them. These girls are like my own little life raft, keeping me afloat even when I fall overboard.
I take out my phone and send a text that I should have sent ages ago.
Yuno: Hi. What should I wear to the banquet? And what's the address?
Minji: hey :) just wear something nice! the address is 0507 Ador Ln. don't be late, there's something i want to talk to you about.
⋆˚☆˖°⋆｡° ✮˖ ࣪ ⊹⋆.˚⋆˚☆˖°⋆｡° ✮˖ ࣪ ⊹⋆.˚✩࿐
Yuno's POV
I stare at my reflection in the bathroom mirror, checking if my outfit is okay for the millionth time. "just wear something nice!" she says, yet the only nice clothes I have are some light blue jeans and the bear sweater that I bought on a whim. I'm not sure if "nice" is how I would describe this outfit, but I don't exactly have any other alternatives.
I would be lying if I said her text didn't make my heart feel so much lighter. It doesn't matter how stupid I look as long as I finally get to clear things up with her. Not being able to talk to her at all for the past day has been complete hell, I wouldn't wish the feeling on my worst enemy. Yet, a part of me feels downright terrified. What is she gonna say to me? Will we still be friends after this? I'll have to hold onto this dreadful suspense until I see her, and probably even longer depending on how the banquet goes. Hopefully we can get over this quickly so I can finally breathe normally.
My dad knocks on the bathroom, peeking his head through the open door. "You ready to go?" He asks.
"Yeah, uh..." I pause, awkwardly looking at the ground. "Do I look okay?"
He chuckles at me, patting my shoulder. "You look great. I'm sure she'll like it."
I take one last look at myself in the mirror before heading out to the car, my heartbeat ringing in my ears as we head to the banquet.
Naturally, the banquet takes place on the far side of the town where all the rich people live. Grandiose buildings line the streets as opposed to the regular suburban houses I'm used to, larger and shinier than anything I've ever seen, their opulence almost blinding under the streetlights. Even my dad looked impressed, staring at all the different houses that we could never dream of affording. All of this only serves as a reminder that I don't belong in this world and never will. To Minji, this is just another Tuesday for her. I sigh, the pit in my stomach growing deeper and deeper.
The banquet hall sits atop a hill overlooking the town as if it's looking down on everyone else with disgust. As we drive up to the building, the frequency of luxury cars increases, making our car look like garbage on wheels in comparison. The closer we get, the more I'm starting to regret my decision to come along. A few guests are talking outside, dressed in their finest tailored suits and elegant gowns. I look down at the bear on my sweater with shame. I didn't want to stand out, yet I'm basically wearing a giant sign that says "look at me, I'm an idiot."
Near the entrance, I spot Minji wearing a stunning black dress that compliments her natural beauty. Simple yet sophisticated... And I'm wearing this god damn bear sweater. Maybe it's not too late to turn around and go back home. I'll tell her my body started hurting all of a sudden and I can't move and—
"Hey," my dad says, patting my shoulder. "It'll be okay. Go have fun."
I nod, taking one more deep breath before stepping out of the car. "Right. Uh, thanks for giving me a ride."
He smiles at me. "Of course. Text me when you want to leave and I'll come right away. Bye, Yuno." I watch as the car disappears down the hill, leaving me completely stranded with no way of escaping. All I can do is face this head on, like I've always done.
With each step I take towards Minji, my heart beat rings louder and louder in my ears. The gnawing insecurity in the pit of my stomach makes it hard to breathe, yet I continue forward towards the impossibly beautiful girl that I've fallen completely in love with. Her black hair flows like waves curling from a waterfall, light and airy, as she exudes an air of elegance and grace. If I survived a beating from a group of guys, then I can survive this one night.
"Min—"
"Hey Minji!" A loud voice calls out from behind me. The source of the voice, a tall guy wearing a sophisticated suit, walks over to her and pulls her into a hug. My blood immediately begins to boil with rage. Who the fuck is this guy?
"You look great! How are you doing?" I hear him ask her.
"U-uh, thanks, I'm fine, um..." Minji spots me, her face lighting up instantly. "Yuno!" I do my best to hide the growing smirk as he looks back at me with bewilderment.
"H-hey. Hi," I utter.
"I'm glad you could make it," she replies, smiling at me. God, I missed that smile. I missed hearing her voice. It's only been a day, but it feels nice to finally talk to her again.
"Um, hello? Aren't you gonna introduce me to your friend, Minji?" The tall guy says. He must be the one Minji was warning me about, I can already tell he gives off a pompous energy.
"Ah, right. Yuno, this is Sunghoon, Sunghoon, this is my friend from school, Yuno," Minji says.
"What's up, man?" Sunghoon reaches his hand out towards me, which I nearly shake before realizing I still have the gauze wrapped around my hand. "Oh damn, what happened to your hand? Are you some kind of fighter or something?" He jokes. Minji gives me an apologetic look while I simply shake my head.
"Cooking accident. I'm fine," I say, lowering my hand.
"That sucks, man, uh..." He looks down at my sweater, his lips widening into an amused smirk. "Cool sweater, man, where'd you get it? Balenciaga? Armani? Target?" he chides, laughing at his own shitty joke. I shoot a glare at him which makes him shut up pretty quickly.
"I'm just joking man, jeez," he says. "I'm gonna head inside, Minji. I'll get us a good table." Sunghoon winks at her before walking off towards the building, leaving me and Minji alone finally.
"Oh my god, I'm so sorry about him, Yuno," Minji apologizes.
"It's fine." I gaze into her eyes for the first time since arriving, my heart skipping a beat as I got lost in the deep browns of her irises. The stars reflect off of them, containing the beauty of an entire galaxy right in front of me. "U-um, is this sweater okay? I, uh, didn't really have any nice clothes to wear," I blabber awkwardly.
"It's cute," she says, her face lighting up as she looks at the bear. "Aw, he's wearing little overalls. It's like he's a little farmer bear."
I turn my head, quietly giggling to myself. How can someone look so ethereal, yet act so adorable? "Oh right, you said you wanted to talk to me about something," I say, fixing my expression.
"Oh, um... Uh..." Her gaze nervously shifts side to side as she messes with her fingers. "Can we, uh, talk about that later? My parents are probably waiting for me inside."
I sigh, disappointed but also understanding. "Sure thing."
She offers an apologetic look before leading the way into the building. As we walk through the doors, my jaw hits the floor from utter shock and awe. The banquet hall is a giant room adorned with pillars of flowers and a giant golden chandelier hanging overhead, illuminating the room with a brilliant light. Fancy-looking tables are spread out throughout the room, seating even fancier-looking people, laughing and sipping from skinny glasses of champagne as they talk. The looks I get from school are a little annoying, but bearable enough—They're all just kids trying not to get into any trouble that I'm usually a part of—but being in this room, looked down upon by these people is a different beast entirely. Instead of being viewed as some scary monster that could act up at any moment, it feels like they're scorning at me like a rat that wandered into the wrong place. It's like Minji's mom times a thousand in here.
"Are you okay, Yuno?" Minji asks, lightly grabbing onto my sleeve with a worried look.
"I'm fine," I assure her. Before she can say anything else, an older man walks up to her, smiling.
"Minji! How are you doing, dear?" He says.
"Hello, Mr. Park! I'm doing well, how are you?" She replies, seamlessly slipping into a more professional tone.
"I'm doing great, of course. It's great to be doing business with your parents." He looks towards me, his face subtly shifting into that of disdain. "Who's your friend here, Minji?"
"This is Yuno, we go to school together."
"H-hello, sir." I reach out to shake his hand only to be met with a confused expression as he stares down at my gauze-covered hand. Sheepishly, I retract it, my gaze falling to the ground in embarrassment.
"Right... Well, my wife is probably wondering where I am and I wouldn't want to keep her waiting," Mr. Park says, not even glancing at me. "Good bye, Minji."
I sigh dejectedly as he walks off, both grateful that he's gone and annoyed at myself for not making a better first impression. "That was... awful," I mutter.
"Hey, it's okay," Minji soothes. "On the bright side, you'll never have to talk to him again after tonight."
"I don't know, Minji, maybe me being here is a mistake—"
"Oh!" She takes an empty glass from one of the tables and hands it to me. "Here, hold this."
I take it from her, giving her a quizzical look. "What do you want me to do with this?"
"Just hold up this glass with your right hand and people won't shake your hand anymore. Problem solved, right?"
She's trying so hard for me. What a saint. I truly don't deserve her. "Yeah, okay," I nod, mustering up a smile. "Thanks."
"No proble—"
"Ay, that's where you guys are!" Sunghoon pops out of nowhere, wrapping his arm around Minji. It's taking every fiber of my being not to knock his lights out right now. "I was wondering where you two were."
Minji pushes his arm off of her, side-eyeing him with contempt. "We were just talking," she states.
"Well, I'm sure there's a lot of people that would love to get to know Yuno. Isn't that right, man?" Sunghoon firmly grasps my shoulder, pushing me towards a larger crowd of people culminating in the middle of the room. I could kill him if I want to (and I do want to), but with Minji here, I'm left at the mercy at whatever the hell this rich fuck plans to do. Whatever. I can survive talking to old people for a little bit.
The next hour crawls along as I'm swept through countless bouts of small talk with increasingly important people, constantly bombarded with questions that I don't have the answer to.
"What are your plans after high school?"
"What university are you thinking of attending?"
"Have you started on your college admission papers?"
Minji and Sunghoon handled everything with ease, accustomed to the talk like they're fluent in a second language, whereas I was barely floating by. Overwhelmed doesn't even begin to describe how I felt. Minji tried her best to help me out, but with an abundance of other people talking to her, her plate was already full as it was.
Finally, after another uncomfortable conversation with a woman that didn't even try to hide her disapproval, I found myself on the outer rim of the conversation. Minji and Sunghoon were in the middle, keeping everyone distracted, giving me a chance to escape. I spot a door at the edge of the room leading towards the outside. I take one last look at Minji, feeling guilty for leaving her like this, before scurrying out the door.
Fresh air fills my lungs, a luxury I didn't know I had until now. I scramble over towards the railing, letting myself breath for the first time in what feels like years. Getting another beating would be more favorable compared to the hell that I just went through inside. I don't know how Minji does that on a regular basis, I could barely get a coherent word out the entire time.
I lean against the railing, watching the full moon float slowly above the town as I ponder whether or not me being here is a good idea. Maybe I should've just given Minji a lame excuse and stayed home. Like a dazzling star in the sky, it feels like all I can do is watch her from afar while I'm trapped by the gravity of my own miserable little planet, destined to fade into mediocrity as she illuminates the night sky with her light. A part of me wishes I never offered to walk her home in the rain just so I would never have to feel this pain. But I did and now I'm paying the price for it.
Isn't it so tragic? To fall for someone that's so close yet so far?
"There you are."
The clacking of high heels against the concrete gets louder with each step as Minji walks up next to me. "I was worried you got lost or something. Are you okay?"
"Yeah, I'm fine," I answer, not quite meeting her gaze. Minji slumps against the railing next to me, watching the moon.
"I'm sorry for dragging you into this. I invited you here for a selfish reason, and after that backfired, I thought I could salvage it, but all I did was make you uncomfortable."
"Hey, it's okay—"
"And I'm sorry for ignoring you all day," she quickly adds, her gaze falling to the ground. "I should've just talked to you instead of running away like an idiot."
I breathe a sigh of relief, grateful that she finally acknowledged it. "It's fine. I'm sorry too, for, um... y'know." Heat rises to my cheeks as I'm reminded of why we're in this awkward spot in the first place. If I just kept my urges in check, neither of us would've felt like this.
"U-um, it's okay, that's partially my fault too anyways," she says, chuckling nervously. Minji looks up at the moon and inhales deeply. "It's really pretty tonight." Something in my head shifts as she utters those words, and I'm suddenly hit with a wave of deja vu as Minji shifts from "The daughter of the founder of a highly esteemed multimillion dollar company" to "The girl who's afraid of spiders and likes teddy bears and dreams of becoming a singer one day against her parents' wishes". The girl that I fell in love with.
I nod in agreement, but all my focus is on Minji, more beautiful than any celestial body could hope to be. The wind makes her long, black hair float and ebb like a stream of the finest silk, while the Milky Way traps itself in her irises, containing the beauty of an entire galaxy in just her eyes alone. She shivers as another gust of wind floats past, and I contemplate whether or not I should give her my sweater. I'm wearing a tank top underneath, so it's not like I would be flashing her all of a sudden...
Without anymore hesitation, I take the sweater off my back and hand it to her. "U-uh, here. Y-you seem cold," I stutter awkwardly.
"O-oh!" Her cheeks turn a bright pink as she eyes my upper body, her gaze flying back and forth. "Thanks, that's very, um, sweet of you," she says, wrapping the sweater over her shoulders.
"Y-yeah, no problem..."
We stand there in complete silence, simply watching the moon as the crickets and the wind play their abstract melodies. The breeze may be cold, but it's nothing compared to the warmth I feel in my heart for Minji. I want to tell her how I feel. I wanna scream it from the top of this hill for everyone to hear.
But I can't. What good would it do, knowing that it won't work out? I know life has been nothing but cruel to me, but having the person who fills me with nothing but joy be this close to me yet still so far away is this cruelest act it's committed. I'm cursed to live a life of mediocrity while Minji undoubtedly skyrockets to a space among the stars, a place that I can never hope to reach.
Minji glances at me, scanning the bruises on my arm. Without a single utterance, she gently traces her finger over them, leaving a line of electricity in its wake. "How are you feeling?" She asks softly.
"I'm fine. Like I said, I've been through worse," I say.
She sighs, moving closer to inspect the injuries. "I'm sorry to hear that."
I turn to her, her face much closer than before. "Y'know, I think you're the first person to ever say that to me."
"What do you mean?"
I shrug. "People don't really talk to me in general. They'll look at the cuts and the bruises and think that I probably deserve them. And maybe they're right."
"Hey," she lightly chides. "Don't say that, they're not right at all."
"I'm always sticking my neck into situations that I don't belong in, it's only natural for me to get hit every once in a while."
"Still, that doesn't mean you deserve to get hurt." The worry in her tone begins to grow with each word.
"I've hurt countless people in the past, Minji. There's literal blood on my hands. To say I don't deserve some kind of divine punishment would be wrong."
"O-okay, but—"
"And maybe this is it. This is my punishment." I look in her eyes, tears slowly welling up within them. "My mother's dead. My father became an alcoholic. I'm left to survive alone while people look at me like a monster. I constantly get into fights because I'm hard-wired to have this fucked up sense of justice that I have to act on for some reason. A-and..." And you. The greatest punishment of all is meeting you. Because I know that I'm not good enough for you and I never will be. No matter how much I like you, you're always going to be light years away.
"...My life has been nothing but a punishment, one after another. I deserve to—"
"Stop!" Minji shouts, pushing me back a bit. "Just... stop, Yuno. You don't deserve any of that. When I look at you, all I see is someone that's been treated unfairly their whole life. You deserve to be happy. I-I mean, look at where you are now! You have friends that care about you, your dad is doing so much better now, and I..." She looks at me with steely determination. Her chest rises and falls with breath, as if she's made up her mind about something.
And then she kisses me.
Her arms clumsily wrap around my head, pulling me into her lips. It's rough and messy, yet so sweet and soft. The heat in my chest expands, hitting every cell in my body. I melt into her, placing my hands gently above her waist. All of my feelings for her are contained in my lips, transferring over in a silent exchange. Her lips are everything I've ever dreamed of and more.
Minji pulls away slightly to catch her breath, warm puffs of her dancing against my cheeks. We look into each other's eyes, not a word spoken but so many things said before going back in for another, this kiss more gentle than the first. She softly cups my cheek, caressing me with her fingers. I pull her in, wanting to be as close to her as physically possible. I want nothing more than to be here in this perfect moment with her forever.
A glass shatters against the concrete, ripping us out of our blissful space. We scramble to get off of each other as Sunghoon stands there, his jaw dropped in shock.
