[nobrashfestivity]

Félix-Vallotton,Laziness (La-Paresse) 1896, Woodcut

[elantravels]

Video 2 is up! I really like this one. It makes me laugh. I hope you're all enjoying these videos, let me know and I'll keep on making them! And please like, share and subscribe to my channel!

[lauren-elan]

Check out my new vlog, I haven’t posted in over a year! Please like, share and subscribe :)

[elantravels]

Back at it

You guessed it! (Or maybe not!) I've started vlogging again! You heard it hear folks. After more than a year hiatus, I've returned. I've very excited about sharing what's going on in my life currently with everyone/anyone who's interested. I will tackle all kinds of subjects - long distance relationships, life abroad as an expat, being away from home/family, love, food, traveling....also, I'll take suggestions from you guys! So please join me! Like, share and subscribe to my channel! http://youtu.be/p5V2qce5akw CHECK IT OUT :)

[elantravels]

Language

Right now, I am sitting listening to a new podcast I just discovered online called “Learn Italian with Podcasts”, I found it on learnitalianpod.com. 

I am learning another language, if you hadn’t already guessed. Italian, that is. It’s a challenge! Daily, I feel like I am not as far enough along as I should be with learning the language that I am surrounded by every day. But then again, things will happen that make me feel proud to be able to communicate with someone who speaks none of my language. Just today, that happened! I feel happy about it, when it happens. So today, I was sitting out on the balcony writing in my journal, snuggling with my kitty cat and there was a middle-aged man sitting in his truck waiting, not sure for what. Anyway, he’d been there a while and we’d exchanged a couple of smiles. It was raining hard, I’m still not sure why he was there...and I suppose I will never find out. He rolled down his window and mentioned how much it was raining, asked if I was studying, I told him writing, he obviously knew I wasn’t Italian the moment I opened my mouth. He asked where I was from, if I had Italian family, told me he had an uncle in Montreal. I understood everything and it seemed as though he understood everything I told him. I said “Ciao”, and that was that. Yes, it was a small encounter, but every time something like that happens, my confidence goes up a little more. I find it so much more difficult to speak with people I know, I become far more embarrassed and self conscious.  

I get an array of mixed reactions when I say I’ve been in Chieti for a total of 9 months, the first is usually that I should be more confident in my ability to speak the language. The second, thinking that I’m doing well considering I had barely uttered a word of Italian (other than “ciao” etc) in my life. For now, I will continue going at my own pace, which is definitely not the pace of a full time Italian student. I do what I can and use tools like duolingo, lingua.ly, memrize etc. Also, everyday of my life is like an Italian class. Unless you’re living somewhere where they speak another language, you don’t fully understand the exhaustion you feel after a day out in the world. I remember my friend Kaelee telling me how tired she felt after a day here, even if she didn’t do anything overly exhausting. I wasn’t working on my Italian the way I am now, I didn’t know I’d be back. Now that I make a concerted effort daily to understand what everyone is talking about, I understand the exhaustion. It’s mental fatigue. 

There’s also another factor I didn’t know about until I got here, dialect. All regions of Italy have a different dialect and dialect isn’t even considered Italian. It’s a whole language onto itself. In the region I live, they speak Abruzzese, which is worlds different from the neighboring regions. That throws a whole new spin on trying to figure out what people are saying to you. L’s padre (father) speaks to me in dialect, less than he did in the beginning because I think he’s realized I don’t know what the hell he’s saying to me. It’s like alien speak. 

Studying is not my forte, I’m trying though and I want to speak another language. Already, bit by bit, I am able to communicate more and more. It’s exciting. 

[elantravels]

I see why

I’m terrible at blogging. I want to be a good blogger, I really do. So I am going to try my darndest (?) to keep a schedule. But where to start? What do you want to know? I guess I can start....restart, by saying that being back in Italy is good. It feels natural and as if it’s my normal life, which I suppose it is now! Being away from my parents and family is the hardest part of this choice. I have created family here, which makes it ok. I have a partner that is everything everyone ever told me to look for and accept in a partner and for that, I am grateful. Do I wish I didn’t have to travel 17,000 kms to find that person? Sometimes, yes. Things would have been easier that way, but I suppose not as interesting in some respects. That’s something I see that I have to work on, my ability to be grateful. 

On that topic, I want to talk about a new friend. I’ll call him GT. He works on the street everyday, selling crappy little knick-knacks to provide for his expanding family. He is black. As most of the people who sell things on the street are. I am white, I am privileged and I have the power of choice. So sometimes, I ask myself why I chose to come back here, apart from the obvious (love). I think about those who are suffering to provide for themselves and their family just because of the colour of their skin and where they were born. Being far from home gives me so much appreciation for where I come from. I think about giving my friend GT the opportunity to see where I come from, if I could buy him a ticket tomorrow, I would. For him, Canada is a heaven. For many, that is. And I see why, now more than ever, I see why. I have struck up friendly hellos with most of these African men that work on the street, they all have the same goals. Women too. 

One day, when I had first arrived here to Chieti, I had gone out exploring my new surroundings. I found myself at an open market full of old Italian men selling fruit etc. I looked like a tourist, I still do on occasion. Here I was, super white, trekking sandals and a MEC daypack. Sore THUMB, that’s me. A black woman, who introduced herself as Gloria afterwards, approached me and we began talking. Her life here is hard. Harder than I’ll ever know. A few weeks later, I ran into her in my neighborhood and she invited me in to meet her sons and chat. She told me that this has never happened to her. She’d never had an Italian over because they were so unapproachable. I know writing about race is a difficult thing and I’ll admit I’m not overly knowledgeable on the subject, apart from the fact that I’m a human being who was lucky enough to grow up in a melting pot society and was exposed to all cultures in one way or another. Obviously I am going to accept an invitation from this kind woman to meet her children, I thought it was beautiful that she trusted me, a stranger.  

I don’t have a conclusion to these thoughts or stories, for the moment anyway. It’s merely something I think about, now more than ever. 

This entry took an unexpected turn. There are so many more things I have to say but I need to figure out how to say them! 

[elantravels]

Honey, I’m Home

August 1st, how the hell did that happen? It seems to me that just yesterday I was elbow deep in nacho cheese dish water, breathing in burrito kitchen smell. It seems like just yesterday I was saying goodbye to my home once again. But here I am where I was just months ago! Sitting on my man’s bed as he records a podcast. I love listening to him speak Italian and it also gives me a chance to try and figure out what he’s talking about.

The days leading up to my departure from Canada were rot with mixed emotions. I was lucky enough to have seen practically everyone I had planned on and wanted to see. That made me happy and I didn’t feel like  I’d skipped over anyone important. Many fun family gatherings and dinners before I went, mixed with chance encounters. I spent the last week in my “hometown” of Lindsay (the use of quotation marks is to show that I wasn’t born there, but spent most of my elementary and all of my high school days there). It was refreshing. Growing up there, I distanced myself as much as possible. It was a scab, a hole of a town. Now, it still is, but there’s something nostalgic and sweet about walking around seeing familiar places and faces. I got to stay in my childhood bedroom (however different it was) and spend time with my mom. 

The day I left was somewhat anticlimactic but it was very hard saying goodbye to my mom. My mom is my favourite person on earth and I love her so much, so there were bound to be tears. I had said goodbye to my dad a few days earlier, it was so strange because I had woken up early before he went to work and we said our goodbyes and he went off to work like a normal day. It was a normal day but I wouldn’t be seeing him for a year.

Any way you cut it, farewells are farewells.They can be pleasant or painful. I prefer them to be pleasant, but sometimes those dang emotions creep in. 

Nearly a month has passed since I’ve been “home” with my honey. Life is pretty sweet these days. Au pairing is a lot better this year because I know A and how he operates. It’s like coming home to my Italian family. Which can be confusing because as much as I love and miss my family and friend back home, I know I’m cared about and care for people here as well. I’m going to close out this blog entry for now, but I plan on writing more frequently. But I’ve said that before, and it never happened! 

[elantravels]

Glob

I haven’t written in way too long. I have started writing entries but the truth is I’ve been scared of being found out by my fellow employees and ratted on for leaving soon. The last time I shared my plans of leaving my job, my hours evaporated and I need the money now more than ever. 

Also, there hasn’t been too much going on. Since I got my visa (yaaaay) it’s felt like waiting around. Not so much waiting as just thinking about the fact that I am making such a huge change in my life once again. I try not to think about the future, but anyone that knows me well enough knows that I tend to stretch my imagination further than needed. So I find myself getting carried away with a plethora of “what ifs” and “but I’m going to have to leave again...”. I’m also learning how to roll with my life. I do waste too much time on netflix and on my computer, it’s my numbing drug of choice. I always have grand plans for myself, for my potential, but I waste it in cyber space. I’m looking at this year as a gift. I am blessed to be connected to so many interesting and skilled individuals where I’m going. Resources. I want to finally start dancing and maybe sing as well as learn how to make some funky jewelry. 

It’s challenging knowing you’re time in one place is limited. Challenging and freeing at the same time. I’ve dealt with this feeling consistently throughout my life and maybe it contributes to my blasé attitude about accomplishments. I think “well, I’m just going to up and on to the next place, I’m just waiting here” and therefore I never begin and thus never finish a thing. I never push myself. 

I have plans for this year. Last year, I wasn’t the best au pair I could be. I was lazy and spent too much time on my phone or computer locked up in my room. I want to be involved, I want to be involved in my life! 

So here’s to new beginnings, even if they don’t exist. I am ready. 

ps - a year ago today, I was introduced to L by his girlfriend at the time at a friend’s birthday. The next night we connected at another friend’s birthday on the beach, L was alone and I knew he spoke English so I globbed onto him. Basically two months later, we were a couple. 

pps - there was no drama, he was dumped and had time to process and things happened organically :) 

[elantravels]

Visa = Stress

Three days ago, I woke up to book my visa appointment only to find out that I had been looking at the wrong month and the only available appointment was 2 weeks after I was supposed to leave the country. My heart started beating and I felt like I was going to lose it. I did lose it, I cried and panicked and had a melt down. I had organized everything so well, I had thought. I had checked the dates...but I guess I was too out to lunch and didn’t pay attention to what month I was looking at (in my defence, the calendar was in Italian). After 3-4 painful, tearful skypes with my boyfriend, we concluded that regardless of the cost and the time we had to wait, we’d get me to Italy. That was a taxing day, mentally but I had a plan, I was planning on going back to the website everyday to see if anyone had cancelled their appointment and maybe, just maybe, I’d be able to swoop in and grab an appointment.

As luck would have it, I went on the next evening and there it was, Tuesday, May 19th had availability. Minimal availability, but there was space! It was the only date with anything open. My heart started racing, it was a holiday weekend, nothing was open. I still needed passport photos and to print my bank statements. I also needed a few other documents printed but we don’t have ink. Saturday night, I didn’t sleep. I was lucky enough to have a friend come and visit who was able to print some things for me before I left for TO. From Friday up until yesterday, I barely ate. I barely slept. I felt like I was going to throw up every second of the day. I can’t remember if I’ve ever been so stressed out and nervous in all of my life. I had this reoccurring picture in my head of being turned away, told I wasn’t allowed, all my documents being wrong.  

That day has come and gone, it was stressful but I was completely prepared. Of course I was missing one little thing, a photocopy of my passport. It was 11:50 and the consulate closed at 12:00, so I sprinted 3 blocks to get this print and once I got back, the door was locked. I had my passport and the copy in my hand and here’s where I began to lose it. I banged on the door and rang the door bell, I ran to the window where the office was and the man I’d dealt with was there. He saw me and told me to calm down and that he’d be out in a moment. He came out, I gave him my passport and copy and thanked him a thousand times. Then I went to meet my good friend across the road and collapsed with tears and exhaustion into her arms. 

If you’re applying for an Italian visa, let me outline the things you need to be considered: 

Passport/photocopy of passport

Application form, properly filled out (don’t sign it until you’re at the consulate)

Three months worth of bank statements up to that day or the day prior, with your name on them

Your health insurance for the duration of your planned stay

A return flight

The letter of undertaking

A letter of accommodation, signed with the address and contact details of the person you’re staying with

$177 to pay for the application process and envelope 

I did my homework. It took me nearly 3 months to make sure I had everything in check and many sleepless nights. But to be fair, this visa has a lot riding on it. Now, I wait, but I also feel the most calm I’ve felt in 3 months. Regardless of whether I get the visa, I will go to Italy. Obviously, I’d rather stay a year, I have so many amazing plans for that time. But if I can’t, I reevaluate my plans. 

If you have any questions about the process, please let me know. It can be overwhelming, but I’ve gone through it so that you don’t have to!

[elantravels]

To Skype or not to Skype, that is the question!

Either way you cut it, long distance relationships are shitty. I’m not just talking about girlfriend/boyfriend relationships, all relationships that you leave behind to be somewhere else. For me, being away from my mom is probably the hardest thing. Sure, being back in Canada we’re able to text and I’m only 3hrs ahead apposed to 9, but it’s still damn hard. In regard to my romantic relationship, who’s to say Skype has improved being in a long distance relationship? I guess the obvious answer is that it has improved it, or at least made it more of a option. It still sucks. Every time I Skype with someone, whether it be my boyfriend or my mom, there’s this disconnection that accompanies the amazing technology which is Skype. I’m talking about the inability to look your special someone in the eyes, the inability to hold them if they hurt. This, my friends, is torture.

It’s not all torture, I know we’re lucky to have such a technology, don’t get my wrong. I love that I’m able to see the faces of the people I love when I’m 1000s of kms away from them. I love hearing their voices and having a face to go along with it. What I don’t like is the false feeling you get when you’re forced to hang up. That being said, I suppose it’s not different from a phone call. 

Here’s where the line blurs. This is where my feelings really get passionate. I am not one to shy away from a convenient text to a friend of loved one, that being said, I refuse to get important information or have important discussions through text. It’s ridiculous. It’s painful. It’s down right stupid. Personally, when I am texting or messaging someone online, I might as well be messaging a ghost. And I suppose in a sense, that’s exactly what I’m doing. I think that we, as humans, faced with this new technology for communication, make people up in our heads. Now, we all have ideas of people which are not correct. We see words on a screen which could belong to anyone but we match them up with the specific person who sent them. There’s no voice to word recognition for your brain to associate with. This is what bothers me. On the days where my boyfriend is too busy to sit down and have a good hour long Skype and tells me that we’ll message each other, I probably get more sad than necessary. I guess he has adapted fine and well to this new form of communication, but I feel left behind in a world where this is the normal. When he and I message, it’s not longer him, it’s my idea of him and my idea of him is not who he is. Just like I have a dream version of him which is not really like him, there’s a text version of him and it’s not really him. 

There’s one more very important component of this discussion; it’s the ability to edit. We’ve now been granted amazing powers to scrutinize every little thing we send to a possible partner or parent, no mistakes and nothing wrong said. “What’s the problem with that? Now I can carefully choose the romantic things I want to send to my lover!” No, that’s bad. That completely eliminates organic conversation, the conversation where you just might offend the person you love but then you’re forced to talk through it and come to a healthy conclusion. Instead, I get to role play. I get to say things I wouldn’t normally say in real life, things like “How are you doing, love”, “Hello handsome”, etc. This is not me. Now, because I’ve had the freedom to say these things online, I’m not brave enough to say them in real life. Even the simple act of stating, “I love you” has been made easier with the technology of instant messaging. More often than not, my partner will tell me this online. He tells me more in text than he does in “person” on Skype. I’m going to be honest, this bothers me. I’m no better, but now I feel almost uncomfortable saying it on Skype, to a live person. Now it’s full of expectation. 

I needed to get this all out, it weighs on my mind daily. If you have any thoughts on our day and age and maintaining a long distance relationship, let me know. I am so curious to hear other people’s opinion on the subject! You can message me via tumblr, tweet me or email me! 

[elantravels]

join me

I’ve started many entries over the past few weeks, but I always find myself being discouraged or overwhelmed. We’re all bloggers, aren’t we? It seems like such a saturated market like everything else in this world nowadays. I don’t want to famous, but I also don’t not want to be known, if you get my drift. I aim to write heartfelt, thoughtful content. I want move you, I want to inspire you to step out of your comfort zone. I did it, thanks to many blogs and internet personalities (people in the flesh as well) and my life has never been the same. If you’re in a rut, money isn’t your number one goal but experiences are, stick with me. I’m learning that money isn’t the be all and end all, it’s important, but it’s not going to completely stop you from searching for what you want and those dreams you have. 

My dream is and was to travel. That will never change. I have been fortunate to have been to more places than some people, but there are still so many things I want to fill my eyes and soul with. I want to talk about these dreams and the challenges of wanting this, on this tumblr. Is this something you want to talk about? Come and join me and we can do it together. 

You may fall in love on the way or it may just be you, I have been both of those people. I will talk about both experiences. If you go back further on this blog, you can reacquaint yourself with single Lauren. She is no longer, but she is now in a beautiful loving relationship. 

All that being said, I suppose I just wanted to outline my ideas for this blog. I hope that it grows, I would like to move away from the tumblr format and have my own URL one of these days. Any tips on how to grow, let me know. How my accountable. Push me. 

[elantravels]

Hi! I au paired in Italy last Summer and I think I'm returning this summer! Sorry if this is too personal but I was just wondering how you and your boyfriend met whilst you were au pairing? Last year I found it so difficult to meet people my age, especially boys, as any free time I had I was usually by myself, so too intimidated to go and talk to strangers! Your adventures look amazing and I hope to follow your next one!

It is a wonderful experience. I completely understand being isolated and nervous to go out. I did spend a lot of time alone as well. It’s kind of a long story BUT we met at a local bar. My hosts’ friends took me under their wing and welcomed me into their friend group, which was so interesting and fun. Maybe the key is searching outside your age group. Luigi is 14yrs older than I am. I remember being invited to the University with some people I’d met at a tutoring session and I passed and went with my host to her hang out...that decision really changed the course of my life. Please, follow along and if you have any more questions, don’t hesitate. Also, just don’t be afraid to go out and be alone as well, that can be a very powerful message to the world around you. But of course, be smart about it. Let me know if you head to Italy again this summer! 

[pretty-lavinia]

I was able to contribute some of my own money to the GoFundMe, so now we’re over the $500 mark. We set $1000 as the goal, but that really just gives us a buffer. Realistically we need about… $800 total, so $300 more, to make this work. Any help is greatly appreciated.

http://www.gofundme.com/moosequeens

[elantravels]

Help this girl out!

[lauren-elan]

The latest Tweets from Lauren Elan (@elantravels). Blogger, traveler, Canadian - follow my adventures! Getting ready to move back to Italy to be with the man I love. Peterborough, Ontario

FOLLOW MY NEW TWITTER, I was dink and deactivated my old account. It’s a new day, it’s a new twitter and blog! 

[elantravels]

La-di-da the Long Distance thing

Here I am, midday, sitting in bed on my day off in my pyjamas. Why, you might ask. Well, the truth is that I’ve been going through a range of emotions as of late. 

I’ve been “home” just over a month and it’s had its ups and downs. Lots of downs. Too many downs. My boyfriend, that for all intensive purposes we will call “L”, and I have been down this road before. Two weeks after we kicked our friendship up a notch into the relationship stage, I had to leave for the UK with my family that I au pair’d for. It was hard, but it was also ok because L visited in the middle of my stay, our time difference was 1 hr and I was in a new place with new people having new experiences. This time around, it’s a little different. I am back “home” and not feeling overly cheery about the whole situation. I am so thankful to have a roof over my head and that people care about me, but I really just want to be with the person I love. But along with this want comes a want to be with my family here in Canada. 

“Why are you talking about this?” You may ask. Ok, it’s a little personal but I also feel and know that I am definitely not the only one going through this process. I want to be an ear for those who are in my situation, for those who can’t seem to rise above missing their love (ooooooh yeah rhymin’). But I am also here to tell you that you CAN have fun, you CAN live your life until you’re back in the arms of the person you love. It’s taken me a while to think that, I an still learning. 

So please, drop me a line, follow my twitter and if you have any questions about the expat lifestyle, hit me up!

Always,

Lauren

[elantravels]

Round Two

I am going to begin by saying that I am sorry I abandoned post (haha) last time ‘round with updates about my trip. It appeared videos were the easier route and a lot more fun. But here I am after just having read a fellow expat’s (I’m a soon to be expat) blog and feeling inspired to give my 2 cents and maybe a little humour to my experiences, and to help those who need it. 

Unlike last year, when I concluded a visa wasn’t necessary to travel to Italy for 3 months, I am starting the process I was once about to start but never started. Wooo, that’s a mouthful. The reason for this? A boy, or more so, a man. Yes, ladies and gentlemen, I met a man while on my last voyage in Italy. It was not planned and the truth is that as much as it’s lovely and amazing, it throws a whirl and our worlds. So now I am going back to work for a bit, spend some time with the man I love all while figuring out our lives and what to do about it. 

The update so far: I am an idiot.

There are many things needed to apply for the working exchange visa, one of which ISN’T a contract. Which I had believed, up until now, was necessary to get back into the country and get a visa. Here I was worrying my man, worrying the people I will be working for, worrying everyone about something that it turns out I don’t need. Truth is that I think things will be more complicated once I get there. Getting permissions and all that fun stuff. But until then, I will begin/continue writing about my journey and will continue doing so once across the pond (for round two). 

[elantravels]

WAVES OF EMOTION!