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@elephantsandpancakes
Candice makes videos here and is generally awesome all over the internet, so check her out. I asked her some questions about youtube, growing up, art and books. :)
1. What was it like doing VEDA this year?
It was good! A little stressful because I usually...
Blogging away
After enjoying VEDA so much I decided to try another month long project: Blog Every Day in May. Want to see how I get on? http://ayomidescrapbooks.blogspot.co.uk/
End of VEDA 2014
I did it! Complete my first ever (minus two videos) VEDA. Think you missed some? Here's a handy playlist.
I'm proud of the range of videos I've put up over this past month - from more serious ones (abuse on youtube, race and representation and idolising youtubers) to unedited vlogs.
It was also a chance to knuckle down and make videos I'd been thinking about for a while (e.g. race and representation) and videos in a style that I don't normally do.
On time pressed days I recommended other youtubers and their videos.
Lastly, I passed the milestone of my nineteenth birthday plus the one year anniversary of my manifesto video.
GloZell shows why cultural representation is so important (x)
Videos like this remind me why I love youtube - the creativity, work in creating something and the ability to share. Happy birthday, Shakespeare
Recent videos
After the heated words exchanged after Carrie (aka itswaypastmybedtime) was called out for using (unintentionally) hurtful and poor wording I made a video on idolising youtubers. Yesterday (Tuesday) marked a year since I made my manifesto video, so I did an update.
One Time - 2 - What’s on second?
Well all have our firsts, don’t we? I see firsts in a lots of kinds of stoires. Those seem to stick out more often. Somewhere, we all decided that our newest experiences are the most exciting. It makes sense—firsts contain risks, importance, uncertainity. But did we always think that our “firsts” or our “greatests” are the ones that deserve to be most remembered? Why not our second time?
In my second episode of ONE TIME, I asked these guys to give me their spin on their version of “second”. How did their firsts affect their seconds, if at all? How was it different than the time before? Should we talk more about our seconds?
If you haven’t seen the first episode of ONE TIME, here ya go!
As Black spokesperson, it is my job to answer all the questions posed about my race.
This week, I answer: How Do Black People Feel about the Ocean?
Twitter | Blog | YouTube
I’m not even gonna try and not swear in this post because this entire thing with Carrie’s DMC in the 401 show is so fucking dumb I can’t even begin to wrap my head around what is going on. People are so damn wrapped around this “victim blaming” crap that you see it wherever you fucking go and in…
Thanks for sharing your story. I’m so sorry you’ve been through a crappy time but I’m so glad you’re aware that I’m so behind you and in trying to help.
Xxx
Before I say anything regarding this post, I want to make it clear that I have been subscribed to both Lex and Carrie for years, and I like and respect both of them immensely. I admire the fact that Carrie was trying to bring attention to a very serious issue and that she had nothing but good intentions.
That being said, the way Carrie worded the message she was trying to convey was harmful. I’m not saying she did it maliciously. Obviously she wasn’t trying to hurt anyone. If anything, she was trying to do the right thing and let people know that it is okay to say no to unwanted pressure. However, the fact remains that a lot of people who saw the interview were hurt by her comment. Victims of rape and abuse were really terribly upset by it, and there is no way to refute that or say it’s irrelevant to the issue. The intent behind Carrie’s comment doesn’t matter. We learn from infancy that if we hurt someone, even if we didn’t mean to, it’s our responsibility to apologize to them. Carrie has apologized, and that’s great. I’m glad she recognized that her language was harmful and addressed it.
But I’d also like to point out the fact that, when Lex calmly addressed Carrie’s mistake and asked her to apologize (in a completely civil manner), a lot of people turned on Lex, accusing her of attacking Carrie, or of having some personal vendetta against her, which is ridiculous. Lex was nothing but patient and polite in all of her conversations about this situation. I’ve seen a lot of tweets and Tumblr posts talking about people “attacking” Carrie, when that’s not what’s going on at all. It’s not attacking someone to point out that they made a mistake and said something that was very damaging. Explaining to someone that they did or said something harmful is not the same as labeling them a bad person, nor is it an attempt to invalidate their good intentions, which a lot of people apparently think it is. But it is so, so important to address those things, even from your idols. It’s more harmful to overlook something problematic like that and pretend it doesn’t matter just because it came from someone you like/admire.
OP has said that we have a responsibility to keep ourselves safe, and this is (to an extent) a valid point. There are measures people can take to reduce their risk of assault or abuse. But there are a lot of extraneous factors involved and every situation is different. It is true that you can avoid a lot of potentially dangerous scenarios, but the video in which Carrie made the comment specifically centers around abuse that may occur in a relationship, a situation in which people usually feel safe. They might find it hard to say no to a partner because they don’t want to disappoint them, or anger them, or they’re afraid their partner will leave them, or they’re under threat of injury if they don’t comply. It could be a matter of low self-esteem caused by emotional abuse or their partner could be manipulating or coercing them. We don’t know. Regardless, Carrie’s comment, even if it’s not how she meant it, implied that if you don’t say no in that situation, you lack self-respect, which isn’t true. A lot of victims of abuse were really hurt and upset by this comment. And their feelings are most important here. Carrie was trying to speak out in favor of people who have been abused, and clearly she cares about this issue, so shouldn’t the victims’ needs and feelings be the first priority in this situation?
Victim-blaming is not “crap.” It’s a very real, very pervasive problem and it’s extremely harmful to people who have been through something as horrible as abuse. It’s also important to realize that victim-blaming does NOT have to be intentional to occur. It’s not about directly, purposefully placing blame on the victims; any language that implies that someone’s abuse is in any way their fault is victim-blaming. As OP pointed out, abuse, assault, and rape are NEVER anyone’s fault but the perpetrator’s. Ever.
Yes, language is a complicated thing, but that’s not a good excuse when so, SO many people have discussed this topic in depth and managed not to say harmful things in the process. It doesn’t take “thousands of words” to explain something well. You can say a lot in very few words. It just requires more careful consideration of the words you use to talk about it. And if you’re talking about a topic as sensitive as abuse and assault, you really should be putting every single thing you say into careful consideration before you say it anyways. Especially because, as OP points out, it’s very easy to misinterpret someone else’s language if it’s not worded well. As I’ve said, no one thinks Carrie was intentionally placing blame on victims or trying to hurt anyone. It is very clear that she was only trying to help. And pretty much everyone has said something harmful or hurtful before. This is all a learning process, and people will make mistakes. But it’s important for everyone to recognize when they’ve done or said something problematic, address it properly, and avoid similar mistakes in the future.
Spot on, thank you.
Today I turned nineteen. You can catch up with the rest of my VEDA so far here.
How do you think the rest of the youtube abuse scandal/issue will unfurl? I'm frustrated that I haven't seen any more dialogue about it and that the youtubers accused have ducked underground since the first few days after the allegations came to light (specifically Alex Day) instead of addressing them in response to the criticism. Do you think anything will continue to happen/change? That they will come back to address this again?
I dunno. Some people (Luke Conard, Eddplant, maybe others) have just come back to the internet with the attitude of ‘well I apologised and now I’m a better person so let’s move on again’. I think with the strange and massive avoidance of any ‘big names’ talking about it, it’s probably all going to just blow over. It already HAS largely blown over, and a vast majority of the perpetrators’ subscriber bases remain completely unaware.
I know I’m definitely not done talking about it, but tbh I kind of feel like the only one.
A new way to look at YouTube numbers
The first chart shows 5 YouTube channels how YouTube tells us we are successful content creators, by number of subscribers and average number of views per video.
The second chart shows the same 5 YouTube channels based on how engaged with the channel’s most popular video the audience is, by comments to view ratio.
Quality vs. Quantity, always to be kept in mind xoxox
In which Sheryl Sandberg, Facebook COO and author of LEAN IN, was kind enough to record a vlog with me! I interviewed her about a few things in the book. LEAN IN: FOR GRADUATES by Sheryl Sandberg (9780753555873) is published by WH Allen in the UK, Australia, India and more.
If you like this sorta thing, please share the video, and I’ll also be doing more of it (EXCITING) so feel free to subscribe: https://www.youtube.com/rosianna
SO COOL
Incomplete list of broad topics for Women on YouTube series:
Identity
Body Image
Representation of women in media
Mental Health/Ableist issues
Sex Ed/Sex+/Anti-Slutshaming
Feminism/Women’s Rights Movement/Discussion of intersectionality and how it comes into play
Gender expression/femininity/gender roles
Sexuality/Sexual Orientation
Race/Ethnicity
Sexual Harassment/Rape Culture
Being a female content creator
Female role models
Advice to younger selves/young women/discussion of being “young” on YouTube
Confidence
Passions/Careers/Women in the workplace
College/Education
Drugs and Alcohol?
Religion
The ~Patriarchy
Consent/Abuse in the YouTube community
What other topics did I miss/do you want to see included?
Videos you might have missed
Recently, I got to share some of my favourite and/or most memorable books in the chocolate book tag, do an overview of my first year of uni, share some vulnerable videos that have helped me and talk about my love of the greatest show ever, the West Wing.
