Seagulls - for reference this is type of lower class mindset of users and moochers. Of course there is the obvious lower class Graboid. But then there is the awful Basic Betty. Now again there are people with affluent mindset in all classes and classy people move up in life. However, the people with lower class mindset never move up unless they change their mindset, and Basic Betties, euphemism for Basic B*tch are ladies who can't level up beyond the Middle Class.
The Graboid just wants to grab, grab, grab, because she is such a crab, crab, crab! A Crab is a person who are triggered by their neighbors leveling up, or anyone accessible to them leveling up dragging them down. On an intellectual level this can be call marxism & socialism, hate the affluent, worship the poor and steal from the affluent because of the entitlement of the victim complex. A graboid wants to "grab the bag and run". So they will try to manipulate first gentlemen and people in general for money. They do such a thing called Finesse, where they pretend to forget their wallet... I have such a story... of a half Graboid half basic betty in Chanel.
A Basic Betty is the kind of a Seagull who sucks up to everyone above her, but treats everyone below her like trash and is neutral to those like her but avoidant. She will meet someone at her social status if she has nothing better to do.
This is why I don't answer the question "what do you do for a living." Not only is it rude, its the favourite measuring stick question of Seagulls.
Elite do not care how rich you are. They are not 12 year old boys don't a pen1s measuring contest in the boy's lockerroom. They are confident and don't care how much money you have as long as you don't ask them for any nor try to use them. That is why many affluent have broke artist friends, as in artists who are not interested in wealth so they don't pursue it but pursue excellence in art. Elite just care you have their mindset, manners, are not a drag. They are pretty chill.
Basic B*tches & Bobs measure everyone to see if they will try to use them or treat them like garbage. That's why its smart to not answer when someone asks you what you do for a living or probing questions like "do you work at home during covid or in the office" which is basically asking "do you have more money than me in your bank account so I can mooch of off you or less money than you so I can treat you like garbage."
Dostoyvesky said "People hate the strong and obey them.. and love the weak and despise them!" And this is the mentality of basic people.
Example: My parents like to buy a property in an up and coming place that got recently gentrified and then they live there 5 years, and sell it at a huge profit. And use the profit to pay for a mortage for new rental properties that when they pay themselves off enough they pot the mortgage into other properties, etc. Multiple streams of income. So they move in. My dad always has a mercedes. My mother dresses expensive, elegant with her expensive handbag. The neighbors were so nice, always visiting and all of them were fighting to dog sit for them. They were weird because they would hang on to every word and admire them, kind of like fans. A bit creepy to be honest. So most of them lived in this neighborhood before it was considered this up and coming thing by realtors but an affordable place. They all have a government job which is their only source of income.
So my parents sold their place after the 5 years when they found a steal. Even better, there was this subsidized housing and there used to be gun fights so the residents bought out that subsidized housing building so that they left. They dispersed them and gentrified the area. So if all the poor are in the same building they will get demoralized and resort to crime but dispersed they will be absorbed into the mindset of their neighbors. So businesses went back in the and real estate prices started growing fast, but it was a steal. This is the kind of a property where the money is made and fast. And it wasn't too far from the first one. Of course my parents pounced on it. It would be financially illiterate not to. Now the neighbors all invited my parents to all their holiday parties and were so stepford nice.
So when my parents moved to the new area, their former neighbors ghosted them. They invited them over for a hoursewarming. They refused to respond to the invitation. All of them like a choir. My parents followed up, "did you receive the invitation" and it went to voice message. Crickets. The whole lot of them. And then it occurred to my parents these people had one job and one stream of income. So these Basic Bobs and Betties thought my parents had to move to the cheaper neighborhood because they had less money LOL due to some financial misfortune and so couldn't find ways to use and mooch off them.
When we came to Canada and were not well off because we lost most of our money in Yemen, but were okay, and picked something near the university, our friends who lived in the most expensive areas visited us, and enjoyed the park, waterfalls and beautiful environment in that area. My mother taught deputy ministers, diplomats and they would visit our home. My mother later interpreted for UN, prime ministers, G20. Nobody cared that our home then wasn't downtown. It was elegant in a beautiful place full of love and joy and that is what mattered.
Now I have another Moocher Seagull story. So I like to keep a low profile and play the broke student to know people's true intentions. Sadly I can't keep up the charade mentoring. So as a result, I met this girl at a party. She was the best dressed with a white chanel bag, and the most beautiful white boots, gorgeous colourful wool fur coat, matching white quilted channel boots. It was stunning. She was a model and so gorgeous. Very stunning. I met her at an event. And we cliqued after I was talking to thai diplomats about silk.
So this Betty the model has a friend that I have in common. She then when she found out said we should go out. Now my friend is still low key, and an immigrant, woman of colour. She does what I did before I got outed by helping you lovely ladies. So we went out for cocktails. Betty complimented my handbag, how nice and expensive she thought it was... which is odd if you have nice hand bags they are cute, you like the craftsmanship so it should not be a big deal. It made me wonder about the authenticity of hers.
Betty talked about how she came a meeting with the mayor and show off. For someone who worked in parliament and bumps into the mayor regularly okay that's cute but she is young so I said "wow what is an achievement for your cause" and we talked about her charity. Then when the bill came, Betty forgot her credit card and forgot having a $20 bill in her purse. All women normally have a $20 in the purse for cabs, emergancies, forget the card. Then she took out her latest iPhone and pretended very poorly - she would fail as an actress to try to use iPay and it didn't work. The waiter rolled his eyes.
I said I am not covering. I could see she was finessing, and that she was that type. I later learned she had an affluent boyfriend, and then mooched off of him, there was some drama involving petty dishonesty. My friend was kind and said "its only $15", took out that plus tip in change. So she promised she would pay her back. She promised to pay her back online. Honestly it is nothing but her attitude I didn't like.
Then she wrote something nasty to my friend denigrating her as an immigrant, WOC. She had no idea that my friend's networth was many many many times hers. My friend always dresses classy, cashmere, silk, everything tailored. No logo. So she was writing really nasty things when my friend a week later told her "let me know as you promised to pay me back the $17. If you are in a difficult time and can't afford it just let me now, its not a big deal."
She didn't want to pay but that hurt Betty's pride. So she made every insult... and my friend send me screenshots. I sent Betty the screenshots and said "listening, stop fineesing. I have read most golddigging and sugar babe books on the planet, and teach hypergamy... and believe me I know the graboid grab the bag & run Penny-digger digger handbook. You can't fool me. If you need $17, I can send you $20 as a gift, no need to pay back but you just have to be honest with me & not try to cheat me. I just don't like dishonesty." Betty was shocked, and send my friend her money and apologized 20 times. "I am so sorry I had this tragedy in my life and wasn't myself."
Another Seagull Basic Betty story. I was out with friends. Seagullina complimented my Dior belt... then she told me how she and her husband had an arguement, can I buy her Fendi bag. I said depends on the bag. It was so hideous, all fur in the biggest Fendi Logo in LV colours. It was the cheapest looking rip off LV that I saw. I don't know how someone can wear that? Then she asked if I could be her giant modern red coach blanket... with vintage furniture. So here is the thing, we all have hard times so I didn't take it against her.
So then I see her half a year later, told me how she had a great time coming back from Cannes and brought me a perfume from there. And we were with my other friends. Seagullina said "Let's all get appetizers and share." Seagullina is not very financially literate and her spouse that she depends on doesn't respect her excess. So she was saying how she was trying to get a lover with a shoulder to cry on to replace her husband who would understand her. I thought "what an idiot, then why do you not work in finance." She is also not young so she can't just plop herself of "Seeking" or "Miss Travel" or a sugar site and expect magic to happen. Financially illiterate housewife is the best way to describe Seagullina. And she dabbles in a fun but extremely low paying feminine occupation, let's say organizing creative hipster children's princess birthday tea parties where she completely lacks any business sense.
Due to Seagullinas allergic reaction to financial literacy and being older than me her husband doesn't respect her and refused to have kids.
So Seagullina said we should have different appetizers and share. She got a lot of appetizers.The rest of my friends, the other two got one appetizer each. She had a lot of wine too. She insisted we try a little from hers. We all tried the others but stuck to our own. She then when the waiter came quickly insisted they split the bill equally. Everyone got so upset at her. It felt sleezy. She seems to be a friend just to use people. If she thought I was broke Basic Betty would not treat me well.
This is why affluent people watch how you trust the waiter... and since Seagulls know that trick, how you treat interns and others you can't get something out of.
Katharina Noël had a great post about how elite don't respect Kim Kardashian because she was quick to cancel her ex husband Kanye when he lost his popularity due to saying rude racist anti semitic comments about the jewish community. When Balenciaga used exploitation of children to promote their brand, not once but twice and caused contraversy, Kim Kardashian said she expressed deep concern as a mother of 4 but continues to work with them. The sharp contrast taking an ethical stance when it benefits her and not taking an ethical stance when it doesn't benefit her financially is what lost elite's respect for her if something else she did, didn't. She is the queen of BASIC.
Unlike the middle class wealth is not stable. You have to risk money to make the big money. Wealth goes up and down. Things happen in life so your brain is your money maker. They say "the people you meet on the way up you meet on the way down."
People don't like suck ups who try to use them. And then worse treat staff & people they can't take advantage of like trash.
How fun are they to be around. They don't get that everyone can see through them and those with money or half a brain avoid them.
Luckily I don't see this behavior frequently among my ladies but I do see this a lot offline in Ottawa a predominatly middle class city where these moochers think they are so clever but everyone can see them a mile away and people wonder why they don't advance.
Elite think long term. Money isn't the only value one can add. If you are kind to staff, they are going to value it much more than an elite everyone sucks up to and is nice to. And these people are the ones who are going to give you a good or bad reputation when people ask around if they want to do business with you. People understand that crabs will lie and say bad things, but if one has a consistently moocher/bully reputation where they either try to take advantage & use those with more as they feel entitled, and bully everyone with less -- nobody wants to work with that.
This is why doing something when it benefits you and saying the opposite when it doesn't gets you ostracized. Example, Morocco is in the Arab league. Saying its not an Arab country now that this benefits you and then saying it is Arab when it does makes people think in what other ways do you take advantage of people.
Elite value consistency. Elite are not chasing every cause. They often have one cause and stick to that. Stoicism teaches elite that you can't change everything but make a big difference in one thing in your control. If you keep flip flopping on things to your advantage people will be scared you are Basic or Seagull and not do business with you.
A Basic Betty does what is popular. So if a business rival tells an elite, "that elite is not all that" all the basic betties run. So there is zero reason anyone should invest time and effort into a relationship with a basic person. As soon as there is the first misfortune, first criticism all the Basic Bobs and betties abandon you.
The reason Basic people are prevalent in the middle class is that the stakes are so low and its stable. Your wealth doesn't go up and down. You don't have vultures and other sharks nipping at any weakness, biting you, trying to take your place. Many people are envious of those at the top and try to hurt them, undermine them and take their place. If you are easily swayed by following what's popular, sooner or later someone will say something about an elite or their money or status will suffer a temporary decline and the Basic Betty will run. That's why elite don't invest in relationships with basic bobs and betties.
In fact if you are on trend and look like a lot of ladies and dress to fit in elite gentlemen will see this as a red flag that you might be a basic betty and abandon him the first time his rival criticizes him. That's why dressing to fit in might be the best to survive a hostile all female workplace but it is the worst strategy when trying to dress to attract an affluent gentleman. That is why you MUST develop a personal style. That's why so many elite gentlemen are attracted to my fur coat. That means I am not basic, that I am loyal and I will stand with them through fire when others try to drag their name in dirt at the first weakness to steal their business.
Wealth is more volatile than a middle class job. One day you are living the high life and the next month there is a bear market so you cancel the vacation at the Versailles palace and maybe Milan will do. Katharina Noël correctly said there is a reason its called a shark tank at the top. No shark wants to marry a nice mouse who wants to be liked and picked and have her move into his shark tank. That is why loyalty is a pre-requisite for those in the shark tank of the elite to invest in a relationship and time with you.
If no matter how nice someone is to you, you can be manipulated to flip and hurt them, being a nice mouse who wants to be liked... then you are a waste of people's time to befriend.
Let's say your friend runs an expensive steakhouse where they set you up with a lot of the gentlemen you dated. Then PETA do a protest in front... and instead of saying thank you, you ghost your friend who set you up with 7 of your exboyfriends and your fiancee... who needs a Basic Betty spineless popularity chaser friend like that.
Time is the only thing money can't buy back. Invest it wisely and in friends who won't abandon you when you are not at your peak. Secondly do not copy any basic betty attributes like trying too hard to fit in or dress the same as others outside of work, or affluent gentlemen will see your clothes as a red flag and approach someone else. Let's say all the girls are wearing the same dress Kim Kardashian wore. They don't know who kim is but see 40 ladies in the same dress. they don't care about the first couple, but the rest, will be looked at like a red flag.
Reciprocity, not mooching, is elite morality and so yes your clothes and appearance should convey reciprocity and by that your style should be personal, and reflect you rather than be about being obsessed fitting in, but looking your best for you and living your best life. Basic clothing = moocher chic. Wear clothing that show that you are reciprocal & fair. Be reciprocal, fair and consistent.
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