elizabeth in furz @elizabethinfurzz - Tumblr Blog

the air in this room never moves. i walk in after work and its stagnant. then i light the candles, open windows and clean. god do i clean. but then when i peel myself out of bed and go about the next day, i come home and it’s the same. its this stale air that makes me sick. i cant change it, i cant fix it. is it supposed to change. i scrub and dust until my fingers peel and ache. for a moment i think its different, the air is calm. then i turn slightly and its gone. it hasnt ever changed and i dont think it will

#live and die

when i die will there still be time to relax for a moment. like will i get to untense the muscles in my back and will my hands finally stop twitching and tugging at my sleeves, just before it happens. maybe i’ll lay down against the porch steps, smoke still lit but mostly down to the filter, and it will happen. with stars in my eyes, face twisted as i weep into the night. the last thing i will think of is everyone, of you. the things that will keep moving that simultaneously help me let go like an eye for an eye situation. do you like me. do you love me. do you hate me. it does not matter

#i just made some bullllllshittttt!!!!!!

sitting in the gas station parking lot waiting for my lover to grab something and thinking wow i could do this forever if it was with you

i would wait in so many gas station parking lots

#im a proud cornball

are you proud of how you function?

is there a part of your body that is more real than others?

can you show me that realness?

#this is dumb #do you think i am real

fast, reckless driving often leads to slow, sad music

#perverts #its happening to everybody