English is not my first language, please keep that in mind.
❖ Disclaimer: I don’t own any character from The Walking Dead. This is a non-profit work of fiction.
❖ Author’s notes: Many of you have asked about Merle. Let me tell you, that I have SUCH a soft spot for him. He was killed off much too soon. I secretly love and adore him!
In his honor, please see the changed banner
Chapter 14 – You suck!
When Daryl woke up the next morning, he was still tired. Negan pushed him hard these days and with Rabbit around his limited downtime was cut short even more. But maybe this was all worth it. She came around slowly. Or he got attached. That was something he didn’t want to think about at six in the morning.
He quietly went into the bathroom and after freshening up a bit he left the room.
He went outside for a smoke. Not that he cared about where he smoked but sometimes it felt nice watching the sunset in the distance when the Sanctuary was still asleep.
His favorite spot was the roof of the building. The access was locked and only a few people knew the code to the padlock. It guaranteed him almost always some privacy.
“What are you doing up already? Thought you were beat.”
Negan walked up to him. He was dressed surprisingly casually. Blue jeans and a black shirt. No sign of Lucille. And no shoes. Yeah, his best friend was out here for the same reason he was. To enjoy a couple of moments of solitude.
Wordlessly Daryl handed over a cigarette and his lighter and Negan took it.
“Running away from Rabbit?”
“Nah. She made dinner last night. Was nice.”
Negan studied him.
“Be careful brother or you get too attached to her. She is a prisoner after all. We are still at war with her moron friends.”
“I know. Doesn’t mean that she can’t come ’round.”
“I warned you before. She is getting too comfortable around you. Maybe we should have that party we were talking about, tonight. She needs to see that she can’t manipulate you with a warm meal. You are not hers. Remember that.”
Daryl crushed his cigarette with his boot.
“I know where I stand, and I know what she is. Don’t ya worry. But I agree. Let’s have that party. Get me Frankie, will ya?”
Negan smiled.
“I will have her all willing and ready for you brother.”
Daryl nodded and left. If agreeing to this party kept Negan off his back for a couple of days, he would do it readily. His damn friend put his nose too deep into his Rabbit business. And always when there was some progress. Damn.
You woke up. Alone. Daryl was nowhere in sight, even the bathroom was empty.
Last night had been weirdly intimate. You could only imagine that he fled the room in order to think about it before facing you.
It was fine. You could mull it over as well.
It felt like something changed between you two. Again.
Suddenly the door opened, and Daryl poked his head in.
“Tonight you will come with me to Negan’s party. Wear something nice out of that bag of yours. Maybe some poor guy agrees to fuck you out of pity.”
With that he left.
Yeah, or maybe nothing had changed, and he was really back to your old status quo and today was one of his asshole days that followed after he was particular nice towards you the day before.
Something nice ended up being the rattiest shirt you could find, and the jogging pants you were wearing for 2 days now. Daryl snorted about your choice, but he wasn’t exactly dressed up either.
You followed him to a saloon type of room with a bar and some seating areas.
On the couches and armchairs sat several dressed-up women all in tight black gowns.
One was getting it on with Negan while a few guys had drinks at the bar.
“Sit over there.” Daryl pushed you towards an empty chair and walked behind the bar to get himself a drink.
He cleared it in one gulp and had the next one before Dwight and Simon chatted him up. Negan only now realized his right-hand man was there and practically threw the woman off his lap. He rearranged himself in his pants with too much fuss and walked over to the bar.
“Since we’ve had a successful couple of days and since I was able to provide my ladies with some gifts, they agreed to spend some time with you tonight. Why don’t you go, take your pick and have a good time.”
Simon and two others didn’t really wait, grabbed three girls and vanished.
Dwight shared a look with a woman across the room but then thanked Negan and left.
“What about you Daryl? I have someone really special for you and just like you like them.”
Negan walked to a door and opened it.
“Come here bitch.” he called out. Frankie walked out of the room but her pretty face from a few days ago looked a little less pretty. Her lip was split, and her shiner did nothing for her looks either.
“Look baby. Daryl is here. Didn’t you tell me the other day how much you wanted to blow his brains out?”
You choked but caught yourself but not before Negan noticed it and winked at you.
“Sure.” Frankie said timidly.
“Well. Go ahead.”
Frankie walked up to Daryl and took his hand, leading him to the armchair Negan had just left.
She pushed him down and kneeled before him.
Your eyes widened. They were doing this here?
You wanted to get up and leave but Daryl pinned you down with his gaze and Negan was suddenly behind you placing a huge hand on your head.
“Please stay Rabbit. You will enjoy this. Promise.”
You were absolutely certain that you wouldn’t enjoy this and if Frankie really gave Daryl a blow job while you had to watch you would kill the bitch (who had no choice, but you didn’t care) along the way.
She opened his pants and freed his already half hard dick. Wasting no time her lips encircled his length and Daryl’s head fell back against the headrest. With his eyes closed his right hand was in Frankie’s hair guiding her head up and down his shaft.
This was part of his torture. You knew it now. He would not harm you physically, but he would do anything to break your mind. He knew that you wanted him. And he told you again and again that you would never have him because you are the sick and dirty bitch now.
He rather used his hand or a random mouth to get his freak on than the willing woman he held hostage.
You schooled your expression before he opened his eyes again to one of boredom.
A couple of sucks from Frankie later he opened his eyes to look at you. And you had the audacity to fake a yawn which made Negan chuckle behind you.
Daryl’s reaction surprised you because it was more involuntary than anything. You had the impression that his cock softened despite Frankie’s best efforts.
He noticed it too because he pushed the woman away and dragged his pants up.
“Next time get me an undamaged pair of lips brother.” he said, and you could see that Frankie’s lip was open again and blood was on his dick as he shoved it in his pants.
“I will keep that in mind.” Negan grinned.
Daryl stalked to the door, snipped once at you and you followed him back to his room.
He threw his door open, and you closed it softly not willing to match his energy.
“Gag me if you must for saying this but what’s the goal in this Daryl? You hurt me and then you go and hurt yourself and then it’s back to hurting me. Either kill me, fuck me already or let me go. This is a waste of energy on your end.
You cracked me wide open. I feel like shit when I look at you. For hurting you back then. For letting Lori put words in my mouth and not having the courage to speak up. For still having feelings for the man you’ve become. Fucking grow a pair already. If your brother was able to forgive me, so can you.”
When you mentioned his brother, his eyes fixated on your face. He crosses the room and grabbed you by the shoulders, a little too harsh but it’s almost ok.
“What are you talking about? Merle is alive? Where is he?”
There was a flicker of hope on his face. Surely, he must have thought Merle is dead after Rick left him on the roof.
Your face softens and you could play games with him now, but you don’t.
“Daryl...”
He shakes his head. The hope vanished as fast as it came on his face.
“No.” Accompanied by more furious head shakes.
“No. He is out there. He is fine.” Almost childlike now. Defiant. Like he pictured his brother alive and well out there all those years.
“Daryl. Sit.” You push him backwards until his ass hits a chair. He sits down still staring at you.
Gently you free yourself from his grip and go to his stash of liquor. You grab the first Whiskey bottle you find and bring it to the table. Then you sit down across from him.
“Are you ready to find out what happened to us once you left?”
You didn’t say finally. Would he care enough about the people of his old group to let you tell their story?
He didn’t say anything for a moment. Instead he grabbed the bottle and drank. One sip. Two. A long gulp.
“Tell me.” he finally said, brave enough to hear it now.
And you start right at the start. The night he drove away, how Walkers came into the camp, killing Ed and Amy.
How you stayed at the CDC for a night and barely made it out alive.
Sophia’s death after she ran away from a hoard on the highway.
The time at Hershel’s farm, how it was overrun and the first tough winter.
You tell him about the prison, one of your favorite times and then there is Merle.
You say his name and smile fondly for a second. Long enough to make Daryl raise an eyebrow.
“We ran into each other scavenging. I was alone in a House he and two of his Woodbury buddies were raiding.
He found me in a bedroom hiding from them. He looked at me for a long while before declaring that the house was a piece of shit and to move on. Two days later he found me in the woods. He was looking for me as I was looking for him. His first question....it was about you.”
You huff. The two brothers who were always bickering with each other. Deep down they cared for the other, more than they would ever admit out loud.
“I told him what happened. The truth. How Lori put words in my mouth. How much it hurt you. I was certain he would kill me right there. He didn’t.”
You sigh thinking back about that day.
“He left Woodbury and joined us. Joined our fight against the Governor. He was a vital part of our first victory against him. Rick was impressed how much he changed. He became Ricks third in command after Glenn. He stopped calling Glenn Chinese.”
Daryl snorted but it sounded a little sad.
“We...I got along great with him. He took me out into the woods, showed me how to survive. I learned a lot from him. When the Governor attacked us a second time we got separated. He and Beth got out on their own. They stayed together. Stayed at a house for a few nights. It was overrun by Walkers and Merle lost her. To Negan. He searched for her but didn’t find her. He found us instead. We made it to a place called Terminus. It was advertised as a sanctuary. Well, it was not. It was a slaughterhouse. They killed humans, ate them.”
Your voice cracks and you grab the bottle, take a sip. You twist it in your hands for a while, long enough for Daryl to become impatient.
“Tell me. Please.”
You look up at him, tears in your eyes.
“He was my best friend at that time. I just had him back. And then they picked four of us to be slaughtered next. Rick, Glenn, Merle and me. They...they gagged us.”
Your eyes travel to his kink drawer. He follows your gaze and grumbles something too low for you to catch.
“We were kneeling in front of a stainless-steel tub, ready to get our throats cut. Merle looked at me. His last...he thought of you in the end. They picked me to be the first one to die. Merle. He...”
Almost angrily you brushed a gave o er your eyes.
“Merle jumped up and tackled one of the butchers. They killed him in front of our eyes. Slit his throat, dragged him back beside Rick and I and let him bleed out. I stared into his eyes until they clouded over. “
You shivered and the bottle in your hand shook violently.
Daryl grabbed it and put it aside. Taking your hands instead.
“Easy. It’s over. You are...” he stops before saying that you are safe here because you both know you aren’t.
Instead, he asks: „Were you and Merle...?”
You sniffled and shook your head.
“No. We were best friends, but he wasn’t that Dixon brother...”
You looked at him through teary eyes and you see something pass over his face. Something you can’t put into words.
He quickly schooled his features again.
“Thanks for telling me. Maybe you can share some stories someday...”
“I would like to.” You force a smile on your face.
Daryl inclined his head and grabbed the bottle once more.
“To Merle. I miss that fucker.”
He took a swig and passed the bottle over to you.
“To Merle. He was our loud-mouthed redneck. We loved him.”
Daryl got up and announced to take a piss, but you can see that he needs a moment to himself.
You ran a hand over your eyes and stare into space until he returns.
He dropped back onto the chair, and you sense that if there ever was a time to let him know what happened and how sorry you are about everything, it’s now.
“Maybe we should have had this talk when you captured me. Maybe we should have had it two years ago. The things Lori said? The things you overheard? I didn’t say them. Never! I was about to give her a piece of my mind but suddenly you were there, and you assumed the worst.
I looked for you all day long. I wanted to explain. Then Rick showed up. I learned about Merle. You took it so hard. I wanted to volunteer to go with you. But Carol, she told me to keep quiet or you would hurt me.”
You brushed a hand over your eyes yet again.
“What she didn’t know was that I was already hurting seeing you like that. I knew what Merle meant to you. I knew how insecure you were around those entitled assholes. If I ever have the choice again between my group or you...I would choose you. I fell in love with you back then. And that is dragging me down the most right now. Because I still am with this version of you.”
You took another sip of the Whiskey.
Daryl was quiet for the longest time. His hands clenched and unclenched.
Finally, he asked: „Merle...he trusted you?”
You smiled a little.
“Yeah. You have no way to trust me, but he said, and I quote: I may be an asshole but mah brother is a blind pussy for not seeing how much ya cared about his ugly mug. Probably rather ran like a rabbit than fall in love.”
Daryl nodded. He could hear his brother in her bad impression of him.
“Ok.”
And that was it. He didn’t say anything else that night. He remained quiet and you didn’t push it.
You gave him a lot to think about and you gave him the space he needed.
End note: That was not the last time we heard from Merle. He will play a very vital part soon!
Warnings: grief, description of losing a loved one, mild angst, but mostly comfort-fluff!
Summary: After the farm fell and you had lost your sibling during the fallout, Daryl helps you through your grief one winter morning by a creek in the woods.
A/N: Hello! So, if you feel like you are seeing this fic again, you are not crazy! I had previously posted this fic on my old blog, but want to move it here on my new one so all my works are in one place! Plus, I love this one a lot and just want an excuse to bring it back. Please enjoy!! (ps- I found this gif on Pinterest, so it’s NOT mine! Credit goes to owner!!)
The morning sun rays shone down through the barren tree branches, causing the three day old snow fall that covered the forest floor to glisten, almost as if someone had dumped buckets of glitter onto the ice. The snow crunched under your snow boots that seemed one-size too small while puffs of air fanned out in front of your face with each breath you took. You had found yourself needing some space away from your group, as the stress of living on the road and the endless thoughts that raced through your head was becoming too overwhelming. You hoped that an early morning walk in the woods would help clear your head.
Ever since the farm fell three months ago, living on the road hadn’t been the easiest, especially now that winter had arrived. Before the first snowfall, Rick had warned everyone that he presumed it wouldn’t be an easy winter this season, and he wasn’t wrong. One week later, a snow storm that spanned over two days delivered almost 10 inches of snow. This caused your group to have to take shelter in a nearby barn that, by some miracle, wasn’t infested with walkers.
It was late at night when y/n came home, She was on the run with some people from Alexandria And was tired as hell, on the other hand Daryl was already home, He Went out 1 hour before her and came back earlier. She was exhausted And just Went into their room ,,Y/n?" Daryl said And stoped her ,,how was the run?" Y/n just yawned ,,im sorry D, im just really tired, we can talk about it tomorrow ok?" Daryl nod And She kissed him on cheek, then she walked into their room. Y/n fell onto the bed And didnt even change, She was just So tired that she fell asleep on the spot.
Daryl Went in bed soon after her, He thought that she was still awake So He walked into the room And was surprised when he saw her half way on the ground. Daryl picked her up And laid her on the bed, then he took off her shoes and pants, he smiled when he saw her cute sleeping face, then Daryl just tucked her in bed, Changed his clothes And laid next to her. He was guick asleep.
Next day when y/n woke up the Sun was high on the sky, She tried to find Daryl with her hand but he wasnt besside he, Y/n turned to look if he wasnt somewhere in the room but he wasnt, She sat on the bed And rubbed her eyes. Then she got up And from a drawer took one of her sweatshirt And pants, She Changed and put the dirty clothes in the laundry basket. Still sleepy y/n went down the stairs ,,Daryl?" She called, ,,'m here!" Daryl said from the kitchen, She went to the kitchen and saw Daryl standing there over their stove trying to Cook some eggs, She came to him And hugged him from behind ,,what Are you doing D?" Daryl sighted ,,was 'bout to cook eggs for ya, but dunno how to turn this shit on!" Y/n giggled ,,D Its ok, I can help you with that" Daryl turned to face her And she gave him a guick kiss on the lips ,,Would be nice if ya helped me" y/n looked at Daryl And saw that his cheeks are little red, she thought he's hot or something but then it hit her, He was embrased that he didn't know how to turn the stove on! ,,Just move aside D" Daryl moved and watched every step She did, it wasnt hard but Daryl just couldn't figure it out. The years of hunting And cooking over on the fire only took their toll on him. After the eggs were cooked y/n prepared the plates And gave Daryl one ,, i dunno what i would do without ya!" Daryl said And y/n smiled at him ,,well i think you would just now be out catching some snakes And cooking them over fire!" Daryl smiled And started eating. After y/n was done with eating She looked at Daryl, smiled and said ,,you know Mr. Dixon... The kitchen kinda isn't your place"
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