Hatred for Summer Holidays
I despise summer holidays. Memorial day, July 4th and Labor day. These days are a nightmare for me. Now before I get slammed by my 4 followers, please allow me to explain. It is not because I am unpatriotic or unsupportive (is that a word?) of our military, past, present or future. My hatred is completely unrelated to the sentiment behind these holidays. It is deeply seeded in the toll they take on me spiritually and physically. There are three main reasons that I dread these holidays. They are all connected in a manner of speaking.
First, I am a solitary witch for a reason. In my experience the human race is full of judgemental, self-centered, egotistical, inconsiderate ass hats. I avoid these people as much as is possible. Not all persons but people as a whole. I have some amazing people in my life. Those that are accepting, loving and supportive. Then there are those that think only of themselves and their wants/desires. The second group largely outnumbers the first.
Second, I am an empath. I rarely intrude. I was going to say never but there are times when it is necessary. I have a 15 year old daughter after all. But as a rule, I do not push my way into anyoneās head. Itās rude and violates my beliefs as well as my personality. What does this have to do with summer holidays, you might ask. Well there are more people wandering during this time of year and most of them think too loud.
Third, I am a fibromyalgia warrior. I know youāre thinking, āWhat the hell does that have to do with anything?!ā If you donāt know anything about the condition, this question makes sense. Other warriors already know. Fibromyalgia has many triggers and symptoms including sensitivity to sound, smells, light and emotional stress. The increase in stray thoughts seeping into my head and the number of sights, sounds and smells that come with summer play a huge role in my stress levels therefore impacting my physical well-being.
Now these three things may seem unconnected but lets see if I can connect the dots for you. During the summer holidays people congregate outside. They drink. They play music. They occasionally have arguments. All of this taking place while my windows are open or Iām sitting peacefully on my front porch. More often when I am trying to sleep. Then there are the dreaded fireworks. Yes, I know they are beautiful. They are also loud, bright and smell horrible. Plus they arenāt done until after dark which in my neck of woods is after 10pm and Iām usually in bed.
Are you seeing the connection yet? My neighborhood is usually a quiet and peaceful area inside a decent sized city. Weāre not a metropolitan area but weāre not the sticks either. The summer holidays turn my neighborhood into my own personal hell. It disrupts my peace, my sleep and my thoughts. There is an abundance of sounds, smells, sights and thoughts that intrude into my personal space. During the summer I rarely have peace. I sleep horribly. I have more headaches. More pain. I become tense, anxious, aggravated, irritable and down right mean. This is not me. After all I am Wiccan and peaceful by nature. This is a direct result of the inconsiderate people around me. The ones who are too busy partying to realize that the volume level is higher than some can tolerate. The ones that think nothing of screaming at 2am or blasting their music so loud that it can heard for several city blocks. The ones who shoot off fireworks well into the night.This is the time of year that I wish I lived in a secluded cabin in the mountains where only the sights and sounds of nature can be heard.
While I love my country and have nothing but the utmost respect for our military, I canāt wait for these holidays to be over. When fall begins and the windows close out all of those other people. Where I can regain my balance where I reside. The time of year when my thoughts are generally my own. My feelings are only mine or those of the ones closest to me. Where I can practice my craft in peace and seclusion. When my pain levels off and I once again feel like myself. Is it September yet?