Empress Of Kashyr

Dungeon Master, World Builder. Sí/í. Les Mis fanatic and Éponine's #1 fan

[empressofkashyr]

I have this image permanently saved to my desktop captioned 'Words to live by'

[empressofkashyr]

every time I get drunk I spend the next week being like god I wish I was drunk right now, which I'm sure is normal

[ozempicofficial]

[veryfastnighuncatchable]

General Lamarque has been dead for 194 slutty, slutty years

[empressofkashyr]

I'm now twitter mutuals with my 4th most listened to artist of 2025

[hotgirlcastiel]

[empressofkashyr]

Empress of Kashyr and Princess of Pig at the Princess of Power tour

[c3po]

shlap shlap shlap shlap (sound of my titties hitting the bars in my minecraft jail )  let me out! let me outtttt!

[alanaisalive]

The other night husband and I were watching a documentary about the yeti where they were doing DNA analysis of samples of supposed yeti fur, and every one of them came back as bears.

Anyway, the next night we watched a thing about some pig man who is supposed to live in Vermont. People said it had claws and a pig nose but walked upright like a man. Now, I happen to know that sideshows used to shave bears and present them as pig men. So every piece of evidence they gave of this monster sounds to me like a bear with mange.

So now the running joke in our house is that everything is bears. Aliens? Bears. Loch Ness monster? Bear. Every cryptozoological mystery is just a very crafty bear.

Bears. They’re everywhere. Be wary. Anyone or anything could be a bear.

[iguanamouth]

oh shit

[throughshadow-to-the-edgeofnight]

[alanaisalive]

As the OP of this post, I’m going to threaten that if this gets to one million notes by the 10 year anniversary on 1 June 2026, one year from today, I will get a lower back tattoo of the loch ness bear monster.

[striving-artist]

At time of posting, this is at 711.6k notes

29 Days Remain

[nelc]

Only 12 days left.

[triflesandparsnips]

It’s Saturday, May 30, 3:18 PM EDT

The note count as of 3:12 PM EDT was 742.4K.

We’re almost 258,000 notes short of the Committment To The Bit Tumblr Curse goal, or what I am choosing to call:

The Bear Nessiecity

You know what to do.

[bluuscreen]

you’re beautiful <3

[oifaaa]

She has done everything wrong, she is trying her best and I love her SO FUCKING MUCH

[empressofkashyr]

It's basically the number one rule of the internet that if you get obsessed with a female character and then look up what people are saying about her, you're going to see a LOT of people hating her for no good reason

[empressofkashyr]

Finished my first book of 2026!

I love cities, I love the idea of cities, I love specifi cities, I love cities generally. I love the history of cities, I love the future of cities. I love to wander cities. I love to live in cities. I love to build cities and imagine cities and dream of cities. I love cities.

The first chapter was on Uruk, so naturally the next book I'm reading is the Epic of Gilgamesh

[empressofkashyr]

Book 2: The Epic of Gilgamesh

The human condition is unchanged in 4000 years. We love, we mourn, we fuck, we fight, we're gay, we're afraid of death and we want to be remembered. In another 4000 years, I hope we're still reading the Epic of Gilgamesh and thinking the same thing

[empressofkashyr]

Book 3: Built

More about structural engineering than architecture, which was what I thought going in, but it was interesting regardless. The author is very charming, and to an extent she is as much the main character as the structures she talks about. I had a bit of a cry at how much our early lives mirrored eachother (who amongst us hasn't had a family member's place of work bombed??) because it was like looking at a version of what my life could have been if I hadn't crashed out at uni

[empressofkashyr]

Book 4: Zuleika Dobson

We continued our tradition of reading a book out loud one chapter a day (approximately), and this month, we read Zuleika Dobson, an absoloutely wonderfully farcical story of the world's most irresistable woman. She's so awful I love her so much. Wonderfully funny book

[empressofkashyr]

Book 5: The History of the City in Maps

If you're sensing a theme in the books I've read this year, that's because my wife got me a bunch of books about cities and infrastructure for christmas. I'm a little bit obsessed with the maps of Paris and Isfahan from this, I want to build them in Minecraft. This was fun, but it's more of a coffee table book than a thing you sit down and read. It's gonna be a while before I post my next book, on account of it being another 2000+ page chinese classic.

[empressofkashyr]

Book 6: Outlaws of the Marsh

Another 2000+ page classic down! It took me 2 months exactly, but I loved this, it was the perfect blend of a grounded and realistic plot and characters with the odd fantastical element smushed in. They would be laying siege to a town and realise the only way to win is to recruit their local wizard. Song Jiang would be hiding from the authorities and he would be kidnapped by faeries who give him books of prophecies, it just felt like exactly the genre I want to run my D&D campaigns in. If I had one major criticism (and I do have one MAJOR criticism) it's the treatment of women. Like, I don't expect a 14th century chinese novel to be particularly feminist, but I was very put off by how basically every single woman is a scheming evil adulterer who gets horrificially mutilated for her sins, while the men are out there doing murder all day and never suffering for that. It's just a *Little* uncomfortable for how often a woman is beheaded.

But otherwise, I liked it. I got volume 2/4 signed by Baby Queen after a concert last month which is a very odd relic to have. Next book i read is going to be a lot shorter than this so expect updates a bit more regularly again

[empressofkashyr]

Book 7: Tao Te Ching

So it turns out that this is basically how I've already been living my life. People ask me how I'm so zen and chill all the time and I never really had a good answer, but I guess now my answer is that I accidentally reinvented Taoism from base principles at 22. Let the world and its problems wash over you like water. Pursue neither wisdom nor wealth nor success. Cultivate within yourself understanding of the self. Take no action and leave nothing undone. This is the Way

[empressofkashyr]

Book 8: Tao Te Ching

I read a second translation because I felt I wanted to really understand the first one. I enjoyed the commentaries and felt they were enlightening but overall the previous translation spoke to me more. Maybe it was just written in a way my brain could more easily interpret.

[empressofkashyr]

Book 9: True Grit

At first I wasn't in love with the prose, but as I got into it I became SO charmed by the main character/narrator, Mattie Ross. I am diagnosing her with incredible levels of autism in that very special way that 14 year old girls have. She is so stubborn and so unwilling to bend her morals or her rules, and is so aghast at other people breaking the rules. Everything has to be done Her Way. She hates haggling. The only person she describes as her friend is her pony. All the adults in her life treat her as if she is some bizarre and unique specimin who is somehow both an adult and a child at once. She has mega autism and I loved her SO much. 7/10 book. 10/10 main character. I was considering giving her 11 or 12/10 but I thought that she herself would not approve of me going out of the bounds of the rules I set.

[empressofkashyr]

Book 10: Dick Tucker, Detective in Drag: A Thot Without A Prayer

This is a reboot of a comic that was among the first presents I ever bought my now wife. It's very silly and sweet and funny.

[empressofkashyr]

Book 11: The Legend of the Condor Heroes, Volume 1: A Hero Reborn

A friend lent this to me since I've been reading so many chinese classics, and I absoloutely loved this. You can really feel the DNA of Outlaws and JTTW in this. Adored it. So furious at how it ends I've immediately bought volumes 2-4. It just??? ENDS??? With no resolution to anything??? I know that's because it's actually just one book chopped up into 4, but SURELY the translator could have picked a BETTER chapter to end this on?? Diabolical. I'm frothing at the mouth waiting for the rest of the books to arrive and for them to translate books 2/3 into english

[empressofkashyr]

Book 12: Folkish

Look, there's nothing I can say here that won't be biased. This was written by my actual wife. So don't listen to me. Listen to Rachel Mann, Kimberly Campanello, and Richard Skelton, and listen to me when I tell you they're telling the truth

Folkish by Kym Deyn is avaliable for sale now from Nine Arches Press

[empressofkashyr]

Book 11.25: The Legend of the Condor Heroes, Volume 2: A Bond Undone

In the original chinese, Condor Heroes is 1 book, even though the translation is 4. I'm counting it as 1. A wonderful continuation of a book I am deeply in love with. I am realising as I read it however that this book has no plot. In that, many, Many things happen. But Events Happening and Plot are not the same thing

[empressofkashyr]

Book 11: Legends of the Condor Heroes

I adored this. The mad adventures in wulin. The insane characters. The rambling unconnected plots. I can clearly see the DNA of the great chinese classics in this writing. I'm devastated the sequel hasn't been fully translated yet

[depsidase]

[empressofkashyr]

mannnn getting high sounds like so much fun, but unfortunately. The history of psychosis.

[empressofkashyr]

walking out of the bathroom, hearing my wife on the phone: So I would put my cards on manslaughter as the likely explanation

me: Excuse me??

my wife: oh my friend is just telling me about some Monk Drama he's involved with

me: ??????????

[empressofkashyr]

1/4 of pure vanilla extract into a glass of pepsi max is a gamechanger btw