Hiii! I love reading your works! I was wondering if you can do a request with Sanemi where him and a hashira! reader are in an arranged marriage (reason for it is up to you)! At first they’re a bit awkward/cold to each other, but gradually they fall in love, please and thank you!!!
— arranged marriage.
✧˖° pairing: gn!readerxsanemi
✧˖° genre: fluff
The arrangement had been made long before either of you truly agreed to it.
In truth, it wasn’t really a marriage born of choice—it was one of necessity. Two of the Corps’ strongest Hashira, united to strengthen the ranks and reassure the others after the string of brutal losses. That was how Kagaya had framed it when he’d summoned you both to the estate. “A bond,” he’d said gently, “to bring harmony and strength.”
Neither of you had been in much of a position to refuse.
Sanemi Shinazugawa had stood there with his arms crossed, jaw tight, eyes hard. You, the newly appointed Ice Hashira, had bowed your head—calm, but clearly uncertain. You had fought side by side before, exchanged words only when duty required it. And now, you were to be married.
That first week was… odd.
You lived in separate quarters within the same home—technically shared a roof, but that was where the intimacy ended. The house was small, quiet, nestled at the edge of the Corps compound, a place meant for two warriors who were suddenly supposed to act like a family.
You learned early on that Sanemi was an early riser. You’d wake to the sound of the front door sliding shut at dawn, his training beginning before the sun could rise. He rarely ate breakfast, often leaving a half-filled cup of tea untouched on the table. His presence lingered like a breeze—loud when near, and then gone in an instant.
He was all rough edges with blunt words, sudden gestures, quick temper. But he wasn’t cruel, and that difference mattered more than you realized.
You, in contrast, were quiet by nature. You kept your thoughts close, your movements careful, and though you were known for your composure as a Hashira, sharing a home with someone like him was a new battle altogether.
The silence between you was thick—awkward at first, then comfortable, then awkward again.
The first time you shared a meal, you’d made too much rice without realizing it. He’d come home earlier than usual, hair damp from rain, uniform torn at the shoulder. You were setting the table when his voice startled you.
“Smells good,” he’d grumbled, almost to himself.
You blinked. “Oh, it’s nothing special. I wasn’t sure when you’d be back.”
He’d hesitated before sitting down across from you. “Didn’t think you’d wait.”
“I didn’t,” you said honestly, and he almost smiled.
The meal was quiet, but not uncomfortable. He didn’t thank you, but he ate every bite. You noticed he left the last piece of grilled fish untouched—small, deliberate, like he was saving it for you. You didn’t say anything, but the gesture stayed with you.
After that, the rhythm of your days began to shift.
He started coming home earlier, sometimes pretending it was by accident. You caught him glancing at the table when he thought you weren’t looking. Occasionally, you’d find his sword propped by the door instead of taken to training at night—a small sign he intended to stay home.
There were still rough moments, of course.
Once, after a difficult mission, you returned to find him pacing outside the house, fury carved deep into every line of his body. You’d stepped forward quietly, offering a towel and a cup of tea.
“Don’t,” he’d snapped, voice low and shaking. “Don’t act like you’re not scared of me.”
You held his gaze. “If I were scared of you, I wouldn’t be standing here.”
That stopped him cold.
He turned away first, jaw clenching, knuckles white around his sword. But when you brushed past him to set the tea on the porch, he muttered, barely audible, “…Sorry.”
You smiled faintly. “You can just say thank you next time.”
It wasn’t much. But it was something.
Days bled into weeks, weeks into months. You learned each other’s rhythms without meaning to. You learned that he hated quiet meals but couldn’t stand too much noise either. That he liked his tea bitter but his rice sweet. That he had a bad habit of falling asleep on the porch after missions, and that he always slept facing the door—old reflexes he never shook.
He learned that you hummed while cleaning your blade. That you couldn’t sleep when it rained too hard. That you always left the shoji open just a sliver before bed, because you liked the sound of the wind in the trees.
And one night, everything changed in the smallest way possible.
You’d cut your hand during maintenance—just a small slip of the knife. But Sanemi had seen the blood and reacted like the world was ending.
“Damn it, hold still!” he barked, snatching your wrist before you could hide it.
“It’s fine,” you tried to say, but he was already rummaging through the cabinet for a bandage.
When he finally found one, his touch was rough but careful. His brows were furrowed, the scar along his face creased deeper than usual.
“You’re too careless,” he muttered. “You treat everyone else’s wounds like glass but don’t give a damn about your own.”
You smiled softly, watching him fumble with the knot. “You’re worried.”
“’Course I am,” he snapped, then froze. “I mean—shit—don’t twist my words.”
You tilted your head, amused. “So you’re not worried?”
He looked away, ears turning red. “…Shut up.”
That was the first time you laughed around him… really laughed. And he didn’t say anything, but the sound made his chest ache in a way he didn’t know how to name.
After that night, the distance between you wasn’t quite so wide.
Sometimes, when he came home from patrol, you’d be waiting on the porch with tea already poured. Sometimes, you’d spar together, the air thick with tension neither of you dared call affection. He started calling you by name instead of “hey.” You started calling him Sanemi instead of “Shinazugawa.”
The first time you fell asleep against his shoulder, it was an accident. You’d both been sitting outside, watching the fireflies rise from the grass. He didn’t move for a long time, just stared at you, his hand twitching once like he wanted to brush your hair aside but didn’t.
Eventually, he whispered, barely audible, “You’re trouble.”
You murmured back without opening your eyes. “You married me.”
He smirked faintly. “Didn’t have much of a choice.”
“Maybe not,” you said, smiling softly. “But you stayed.”
That silenced him. He didn’t move, didn’t breathe too loudly—just sat there, listening to your steady heartbeat against his arm.
Later, when you both went inside, he quietly unfolded an extra blanket over you before lying down beside you for the first time.
He didn’t sleep much that night. He just watched the moonlight spill over your face and thought—for the first time in years—that maybe the arrangement had never been a duty at all.
By the time Kagaya visited months later to check on the “union,” he found not two reluctant soldiers, but something closer to peace.
When he stepped into the courtyard, Sanemi was chopping wood, scowling at a crooked log. You were nearby, hanging laundry in the sun, humming softly. The domesticity of it all made the Master smile.
He greeted you both warmly, and you bowed in perfect sync.
And as he left, Kagaya glanced back once more, at the faint curve of Sanemi’s lips when you brushed sawdust from his hair, at the way his shoulders finally looked unburdened.
He said nothing, but the smile lingered long after he was gone.
Because what began as duty had turned into something far rarer, and infinitely more precious.
A love neither of you had expected, but both of you had built—quietly, stubbornly, piece by piece.
Plot: Giyuu is your childhood friend; however, one night in your apartment completely blurs the lines, leaving unspoken feelings that eventually boil over.
Author's Note: THIS.TOOK.HOURS!!! I should really go to bed. (Damn I haven’t written anything happy about Giyuu in a minute, I probably should.)
cw: Nsfw, Friendship loss
The first time you met Giyuu Tomioka, you were six years old.
He was sitting sadly on a swing, scrawny and short, with dirt on his knees and messy hair.
You thought he looked lonely, so you approached him.
He didn't pay you any mind, but you stayed anyway.
And that was how it all started.
It wasn't anything dramatic. Nothing with him ever had been.
Just a stubborn little girl and a lonely little boy both deciding they didn't want to be lonely anymore.
For as long as anyone could remember, there had always been a you and a Giyuu.
In elementary school, you shared snacks at lunch.
In middle school, you shared answers when one of you forgot the homework.
In high school, you shared everything else.
Secrets you'd never dare tell your parents.
Your hopes. Your dreams.
Your fears.
He knew all of it.
You knew how he liked his coffee.
You knew how he got when he was upset or embarrassed.
You knew when he was having a bad day because you'd learned what every expression on his face meant.
People always seemed to assume the two of you would eventually end up together, but to you, he was always just Giyuu.
Your Giyuu.
You were best friends.
Nothing more. Nothing less.
At seventeen, he sat beside you at family dinners while your relatives cracked jokes.
At eighteen, he sat beside you at graduation and took ridiculous pictures with you.
At nineteen, he helped you move into your first apartment. The poor guy spent all day carrying every item in your room.
At twenty-one, he spent six hours helping you assemble a stupid piece of furniture you'd bought from IKEA.
At twenty-three, he drove out to pick you up at two in the morning when your car broke down.
And even now, at twenty-four, he was always there for you.
Because Giyuu would always be there for you, no matter what, and that was something you could count on.
You never had to ask.
He was just there.
Always.
Like the moon.
Like breathing.
Like something so constant you never imagined a life without it.
Which was probably why, when your boyfriend broke up with you, the first person you called wasn't your parents.
Or any of your other friends.
It was Giyuu.
The call lasted no more than three seconds, just long enough for him to hear you crying.
And fifteen minutes later, he was standing at your door with ice cream and a fluffy blanket.
You didn't know it then, but that call was about to change everything you thought you knew.
His hair was damp from the rain, a convenience store bag slung over his shoulder. Just the familiar sight of him made you feel a little better.
And he wasted no time pulling you into his embrace.
The second your head hit his chest, you started crying again.
Ugly crying.
The kind of crying that made your chest ache.
And he simply held you.
He didn't say anything. He never really knew how to in moments like these.
But his arms around you were enough.
They were always enough.
And he stood there through all of it.
Patient.
Steady.
Unmoving.
Like he was afraid you'd fall apart if he let go.
Eventually, the tears slowed.
Then stopped.
The apartment fell quiet.
Giyuu glanced down at the convenience store bag.
"I bought food."
Despite everything, a weak laugh escaped you.
"You always bring food."
"You forget to eat when you're sad."
You hated that he was right.
He was always right about things like that.
A few minutes later, the two of you were sitting on the floor eating convenience store ramen straight from the cups.
The television played quietly in the background.
Neither of you were watching it.
"You know what the worst part is?" you asked suddenly.
Giyuu looked over.
You stared down at your noodles.
"I kept thinking if I tried harder, maybe things would've worked."
The words tasted bitter.
"Maybe if I was different."
The silence stretched.
Then—
"No."
You blinked.
"No?"
Giyuu shook his head.
"No."
His answer was immediate.
Certain.
Like there wasn't a single doubt in his mind.
"You shouldn't have to become someone else for someone to stay."
Your chest tightened.
It wasn't some grand speech.
It wasn't poetic.
It was just Giyuu.
Simple.
Honest.
And somehow, that made it hurt more.
You looked away before he could see your eyes watering again.
"Since when did you get good at this?"
"I'm not."
"You kind of are."
He frowned.
"I'm really not."
You laughed despite yourself.
A small smile appeared on his face.
Tiny.
Barely noticeable.
But it was there.
And for a moment, things felt normal again.
Like they had when you were kids.
Like they had before heartbreak entered the picture.
You didn't realize Giyuu was watching you.
Didn't notice the way his shoulders relaxed when you laughed.
Didn't see the quiet relief in his eyes.
Because to you, he was simply your best friend.
The person who had always been there.
The person who always would be.
And Giyuu?
Well.
Giyuu had started to realize that was no longer enough.
Because somewhere between childhood and adulthood, something had changed.
The rain never stopped, and the hours passed without either of you noticing.
You curled up on the couch and watched a movie while eating strawberry ice cream, the leftover ramen forgotten on the table.
At some point, you'd moved closer together, invading each other's space.
Not intentionally.
It just happened.
Comfortable.
Natural.
The way things always felt with him.
He leaned in.
Slow.
Giving you every chance to turn your head.
You didn't.
His lips met yours.
A dam breaking.
It started gentle.
A soft exploration.
But the passion behind it was immediate.
His hands moved to the sides of your waist.
Fingers digging in slightly through your shirt.
Pulling you flush against him.
The familiar couch suddenly felt too small.
You shifted to face him fully.
Straddling his lap.
You felt the solid, firm muscle of his thighs beneath you.
The heat radiating off his chest.
Giyuu let out a low, shaky breath against your mouth.
His hands slid up your back.
Mapping the curve of your spine.
Pulling you so close there wasn't an inch of space left between your bodies.
He pulled back just a fraction.
Forehead resting against yours.
His chest rising and falling heavily against your own.
His eyes were wide.
Dark.
Completely unguarded.
"I don't want to go back," he whispered.
His voice was rough.
Stripped of his usual stoicism.
“I can't." he whispered softly against your lips “I need you Y/n”
You caught your breath.
His honesty hung in the air.
Heavy.
Terrifying.
You placed your hands flat against his chest.
Feeling the rapid, hard thud of his heartbeat.
You needed to anchor yourself.
You needed to anchor him.
"Giyuu," you said softly.
Your voice was steady, but gentle.
"Tonight. Just tonight. Let’s not overthink it."
We’re here right now," you whispered, your thumb brushing his cheek.
"It doesn't have to mean everything has to change tomorrow. Let's just... let it be simple."
You called it simple.
You called it casual.
But the way he looked at you proved it was anything but casual.
He didn't argue.
He just closed the distance again.
His hands moved to the hem of your shirt.
Slow.
Deliberate.
Pulling the fabric up and over your head, tossing it onto the floor.
The cool air of the room hit your bare skin.
Then came his hands.
Warm.
Calloused.
Resting against your bare waist.
You reached for the buttons of his shirt.
Your fingers were slightly clumsy, unfastening them one by one.
Parting the fabric.
Revealing the broad, pale expanse of his chest.
The hard alignment of his collarbone.
You pressed your palms against his bare chest.
He was so warm.
A solid, living weight beneath you.
Giyuu shifted, lifting you slightly to slide your sweatpants down your legs.
There was no modesty left between you.
Just the raw, feeling of skin against skin.
He guided you back onto the cushions of the couch.
Hovering over you.
The muscles in his arms tensing as he held his weight up.
Looking down at you like you were the only thing left in the world.
His thighs braced on either side of your hips.
Heavy.
Solid.
"Simple," he murmured back to you.
His voice was a low vibration.
He reached down to the waistband of his boxers, sliding them off and pushing them aside.
Your breath caught in your throat at the sight of him.
He was fully erect, thick and heavy, the pale skin of cock pulsing with a deep, dark heat. A single drop of pre-cum glistened at his tip, and the sheer length of him made your stomach do a somersault.
He looked completely different like this, raw, compared to his usual quiet demeanor.
Giyuu didn't move to close the distance right away.
Instead, his calloused hand slid down your stomach.
Past your hip.
Finding the soft crease of your thigh.
You shivered, your knees parting instinctively under his touch.
His fingers moved closer, brushing against the outer lips of your heat.
You were already wet, the heat radiating from your center making the skin wet and receptive.
He let out a low, ragged breath at the feel of your wetness, his thumb finding your clit and tracing a slow, heavy circle against it.
A sharp gasp left your mouth.
Your hips twitched upward against his hand.
"Y/n” he murmured, his voice thick.
He slid his middle finger inside you.
The tight, burning heat of your cunt gripped him instantly, your walls coating his finger with your slick.
He pushed deeper as if experimenting before adding a second finger.
The smooth, slow stretching made you moan aloud, your fingers tangling in the fabric of the couch cushions as he began to curl his fingers inside you, mimicking the rhythm his hips wanted to take.
He pumped his fingers into your heat, his thumb keeping up a steady, agonizing pressure on your clit until you were writhing beneath him, completely undone by the friction.
You reached down, your hand trembling as your fingers wrapped around the base of his hard cock.
The skin was smooth, tight, and incredibly hot.
You slid your hand up and down his length, feeling the solid muscle beneath and the twitch of him against your palm.
Giyuu growled, a sharp, uncharacteristic sound that vibrated against your chest.
He pulled his fingers from your soaking wetness, leaving you aching and completely open.
He leaned down, burying his face in the crook of your neck.
His lips pressed a warm, lingering kiss right against your pulse point.
You gasped, your hands flying to his shoulders.
Gripping the firm muscle there as a wave of heat rushed through you.
He moved over you with a slow, agonizing patience.
His hips nudging against yours.
He aligned his cock at your entrance, sliding it between your wet folds
Testing the boundaries
When he finally pushed forward, entering you, it was a smooth, deep ache.
The tip of his cock parted your slick folds, sliding deep into the tight, burning expanse of your cunt.
A slow sliding of heat that made your eyes squeeze shut.
A soft cry left your throat, muffled against his shoulder.
Giyuu froze.
His breathing stopped.
"Are you okay?" he whispered, his voice laced with sudden anxiety.
You opened your eyes, looking into his.
He was trying so hard to keep it casual.
To keep it light.
But he was trembling slightly.
"Yeah," you breathed, wrapping your legs around his waist to pull him closer. "Yeah, Giyuu. Please."
He let out a ragged exhale.
And then he moved.
It wasn't fast.
It wasn't a frantic, aggressive rush.
It was steady.
A slow, rolling rhythm that filled you completely.
Every slide of his skin against yours felt magnified.
The friction of his thighs against yours.
The weight of his chest pressing down onto your breasts.
You tangled your fingers in his dark hair.
Pulling him down for a kiss.
It was slick, deep, and quiet.
The only sounds in the room were the steady rhythm of the rain outside and the soft, wet friction of your bodies moving together.
The casual lie you had told yourself was completely unraveling.
There was nothing casual about the way he held your hand, pinning it to the cushion next to your head, his fingers tightly interlocking with yours.
There was nothing casual about the way his eyes never left your face, watching every tilt of your head, every parted breath.
The tension in your lower stomach began to tighten.
A coil drawing smaller and smaller.
Your movements became more urgent, your hips lifting instinctively to meet his downstrokes.
Giyuu felt the shift.
His pace quickened just a fraction.
His breathing turning into shallow, heavy gasps against your ear.
The muscles in his back flexed beneath your fingertips, slick with a light sweat.
"Y/n, I’m close” he choked out.
your name.
it sounded like a confession.
The coil snapped.
A sudden, blinding rush of warmth spilled through your veins, making your muscles contract around him.
Your head fell back against the cushion, a loud moan breaking from your lips.
Seeing you break made him lose his hold.
With two more deep, heavy thrusts, Giyuu buried himself completely inside you.
His body went rigid.
A low, guttural groan tore from his throat as he spent himself, his forehead dropping heavily against your shoulder.
The room settled back into silence.
Just the rain.
Just the sound of two people catching their breath.
He didn't pull away immediately.
He stayed inside you, his heavy frame relaxing over yours, letting you carry his weight.
His hand was still tangled in yours.
Slowly, his thumb began to trace lazy circles on the back of your knuckles.
It was supposed to be casual.
You both knew it.
But as you lay there in the dark, listening to the rain, neither of you wanted to move.
The next morning was awkward.
Not because either of you regretted it.
But because neither of you knew what came next.
You found Giyuu standing in your kitchen making coffee.
Like he had done a hundred times before.
Like nothing had changed.
"Morning."
"Morning."
He handed you a mug without looking up.
You accepted it automatically.
"Did you sleep okay?" he asked.
"Yeah."
A pause.
"You?"
"Yeah."
Another pause.
Neither of you knew what to do with yourselves.
"So..." you started.
"So..." he echoed.
Then both of you fell silent.
That was it.
No conversation.
No discussion.
No labels.
No questions.
Just two people pretending they weren't standing in the aftermath of something that had changed everything.
And somehow that was worse.
Because if neither of you acknowledged it, then neither of you had to risk losing what you already had.
So you didn't.
Days became weeks.
Weeks became months.
And somehow the line between friendship and something else disappeared completely.
Movie nights turned into spending the night.
Spending the night became staying the weekend.
His toothbrush appeared beside yours.
A drawer in your apartment slowly filled with his clothes.
Friends started giving each other looks whenever the two of you walked into a room together.
Neither of you corrected them.
Neither of you confirmed it either.
One afternoon, Mitsuri took one look at the two of you sharing a booth at lunch and groaned dramatically.
"Oh, come on."
You looked up.
"What?"
"You two are impossible."
Giyuu blinked.
"What did we do?"
Mitsuri stared at him.
Then at you.
Then back at him.
"You know what? Never mind."
Neither of you understood what she was talking about.
Or maybe you didn’t understand, and assumed he didn’t as well.
You were stuck somewhere in between.
And for a while, that felt okay.
Maybe even perfect.
Because you got all the good parts.
The comfort.
The affection.
The companionship.
The certainty that if you called him at three in the morning, he'd answer.
And Giyuu got something too.
Hope.
Every time you reached for his hand.
Every time you rested your head on his shoulder.
Every time you fell asleep beside him.
He thought maybe you were getting there.
Maybe you just needed time.
Maybe one day you'd look at him and realize what he already knew.
That you were it for him.
That there had never been anyone else.
So he waited.
Patiently.
Quietly.
The way he'd always waited for you.
The problem was that while Giyuu was waiting for the future—
You were still trying to recover from the past.
It happened on a Tuesday.
Not during a fight.
Not after some dramatic argument.
Just a normal Tuesday.
The kind that changes your life forever.
You were curled up on the couch scrolling through your phone while Giyuu cooked dinner.
The apartment smelled like curry.
Music played quietly from a speaker somewhere.
Everything felt comfortable.
Familiar.
Safe.
Which was probably why you didn't notice how quiet he'd been all evening.
"Giyuu?"
"Hm?"
"Are you almost done?"
"Five minutes."
You smiled.
"That's what you said ten minutes ago."
"I was estimating."
"You were wrong."
"I know."
A small smile tugged at his lips as he stirred the pot.
And then he went quiet again.
You didn't think much of it.
After all, Giyuu had always been quiet.
You just didn't realize this silence was different.
"Giyuu?"
"Hm?" he responded absentmindedly from the kitchen.
You finally looked up from your phone.
"Can you grab me a drink?" you asked casually.
"Yeah," he replied with a small nod.
He set the spoon down and moved toward the refrigerator.
You smiled faintly.
"Thanks."
He glanced back briefly and gave another small nod.
A few moments later, he handed you the can.
You took it without looking up.
"Thanks."
"You're welcome," he said quietly.
The silence stretched.
Longer than usual.
Heavy.
Then—
"What are we?" he asked suddenly, his voice low and careful.
Your thumb froze over your screen.
The words were so unexpected that for a second you wondered if you'd imagined them.
"What?" you asked, blinking up at him.
Giyuu stood across from you near the kitchen island.
His hands were shoved deep into his pockets.
His shoulders were tense.
His eyes fixed firmly on the floor.
"What are we?" he repeated, his tone steadier this time, though there was something strained beneath it.
The room suddenly felt smaller.
You let out a nervous laugh.
"What kind of question is that?" you asked with an awkward smile.
His expression didn't change.
The smile slipped from your face.
And for the first time all evening, he looked at you.
Really looked at you.
The answer should have been easy.
That was the problem.
You'd known each other almost your entire lives.
You spent more time together than anyone else.
You slept in the same bed.
You celebrated holidays together.
You knew each other's coffee orders.
You knew each other's fears.
If someone asked what Giyuu meant to you, you could have talked for hours.
So why couldn't you answer one simple question?
"What are we?" he asked again, softer this time.
Almost hesitant.
Almost afraid.
Like he already knew the answer but needed to hear it anyway.
Your stomach twisted.
"Giyuu..." you started weakly.
His jaw tightened.
"I just want to know," he said quietly, finally lifting his eyes to yours. There was no anger in them. Just uncertainty.
You opened your mouth.
Then closed it again.
Because the truth was complicated.
You loved him.
Of course you loved him.
But every time you thought about relationships, your chest tightened.
Every time things started feeling too serious, you remembered being left behind.
Being hurt.
Being abandoned.
You weren't ready.
You didn't know if you'd ever be ready.
And the longer you stayed silent, the more Giyuu seemed to understand.
His shoulders sank.
Just slightly.
But you noticed.
Because you'd spent twenty years learning every expression he made.
Every tiny shift in posture.
Every sign he was hurting.
"Say something," he whispered.
The words came out smaller than before.
His voice almost sounded fragile.
You hated the look in his eyes.
The hope.
Because suddenly you realized how long he'd been carrying it.
How long he'd been waiting.
How long he'd believed this was heading somewhere.
"I don't know," you admitted quietly.
The second the words left your mouth, you wished you could take them back.
For a moment, Giyuu simply stared at you.
Not angry.
Not surprised.
Just hurt.
The kind of hurt that sat quietly inside a person and hollowed them out from the inside.
Then his gaze dropped.
"Oh."
A single word.
Barely audible.
Yet somehow it felt like a knife.
Your chest tightened.
"Giyuu—"
He shook his head quickly before you could continue.
"It's okay," he said automatically, forcing a small smile that didn't reach his eyes.
It wasn't.
You could hear that.
See it.
The strain in his voice.
The way his fingers curled tightly inside his pockets.
"It's not okay," you said softly.
A hollow laugh escaped him.
Quiet.
Humorless.
"No," he admitted, looking away.
He swallowed hard.
"I guess it isn't."
Silence settled between you.
The music continued playing softly in the background.
The smell of curry still filled the apartment.
Everything looked exactly the same.
And yet suddenly nothing felt familiar anymore.
"When did you know?" he asked after a long pause, his voice distant.
The question caught you off guard.
"What?"
His eyes remained fixed on the floor.
"When did you know it wasn't me?" he asked, his expression unreadable.
Your breath caught.
"Giyuu..."
"Was it recently?" he asked calmly.
Too calmly.
"Or have you known for a while?"
You couldn't answer.
Because every answer felt cruel.
And judging by the sad smile that briefly crossed his face, he already knew that.
"I think part of me always knew," he admitted quietly.
He rubbed the back of his neck.
A nervous habit he hadn't had since high school.
"I just didn't want to believe it."
The tears were already building behind your eyes.
"Giyuu, please," you whispered.
His gaze finally lifted.
And for the first time, you realized how tired he looked.
Not physically.
Emotionally.
Like he'd been carrying something heavy for so long he'd forgotten what it felt like to put it down.
"So many people thought we were together," he said with a faint, bittersweet smile.
His voice softened.
"Mitsuri."
A weak laugh escaped him.
"Tanjiro."
Another.
"Your mother."
Despite everything, your chest tightened painfully.
Because he was right.
Everyone had thought it.
Everyone except you.
"And every single time..." he continued, his smile slowly fading.
His eyes dropped again.
"...I hoped the next time someone asked, I'd finally be able to say yes."
The room fell silent.
Then he looked back at you.
And smiled.
A sad one.
The saddest smile you'd ever seen.
"I don't want to be someone's temporary person anymore," he said with a sad, defeated smile.
The words knocked the air from your lungs.
Because suddenly you understood.
Every late-night call.
Every holiday.
Every morning.
Every promise.
Every piece of himself he'd given you.
He'd been giving them with the expectation that one day you'd choose him.
And you hadn't.
Not because you didn't care.
But because you couldn't.
And in the end, that distinction didn't matter.
Giyuu swallowed hard.
His eyes drifted around the apartment.
The couch where you'd spent countless movie nights.
The blanket draped over the armrest.
The coffee mug you'd bought him years ago sitting beside the sink.
His gaze lingered on each thing for a moment.
Like he was saying goodbye.
Then he looked back at you.
"I love you," he confessed quietly, his expression painfully sincere.
The confession was quiet.
Simple.
No grand speech.
No dramatic declaration.
Just the truth.
The truth he'd probably been carrying for years.
Your eyes filled immediately.
"Giyuu..." you whispered shakily, tears already gathering in your eyes.
His expression faltered.
Just for a second.
Then he shook his head.
As if he already knew what you were about to say.
And didn't want to hear it.
Because if you loved him back, you would've answered the question.
And if you didn't—
There was nothing left to discuss.
"You don't have to say it back," he said softly, looking away with a pained smile.
The words sounded rehearsed.
Like he'd prepared himself for this outcome long before tonight.
You felt something inside your chest crack.
So he nodded once.
A final goodbye disguised as understanding.
Then he turned and started toward the door.
Leaving you sitting on the couch.
Leaving behind the apartment.
The dinners.
The movie nights.
The years.
Leaving behind the future he'd imagined.
And neither of you realized it then.
But that would be the last time Giyuu Tomioka was ever truly yours.
"Giyuu, please say something," you pleaded desperately, your voice trembling with panic.
Because suddenly it felt like something was slipping through your fingers.
Something important.
Something irreplaceable.
He stopped.
Not turning around.
Just stopping.
His shoulders rose with a slow breath.
Then fell.
For a long moment, he didn't answer.
You watched him close his eyes.
Watched his jaw tighten.
Like he was trying to gather the strength to say something he'd been holding in for a very long time.
When he finally turned back toward you, his eyes were tired.
Not angry.
Not resentful.
Just tired.
And somehow that hurt more than if he'd yelled.
"You know what's funny?" he asked quietly, letting out a hollow laugh.
You shook your head.
"I kept telling myself you just needed time," he admitted bitterly, his gaze distant.
Your chest tightened.
"I thought if I waited long enough..." he continued softly.
His gaze dropped to the floor.
"If I was patient enough..." he murmured.
His fingers curled tightly against his palms.
"...eventually you'd get there," he finished with a sad smile that didn't reach his eyes.
The tears were already building behind your eyes.
"Giyuu—" you started helplessly.
"That eventually you'd choose me," he whispered, heartbreak evident in every word.
And for the first time, you heard how much that hope had cost him.
"Giyuu—" you tried again, your voice cracking.
"I don't blame you," he interrupted gently, offering a small shake of his head.
The way someone might stop another person from apologizing for a wound they never meant to cause.
"I really don't," he said quietly, meeting your eyes.
His eyes met yours.
And somehow that made everything worse.
Because he meant it.
He wasn't angry.
He wasn't trying to make you feel guilty.
He was simply heartbroken.
"But I'm tired," he confessed
The confession was barely above a whisper.
And yet it hit harder than anything else he'd said.
Because Giyuu Tomioka was the most patient person you'd ever known.
The kind of person who would suffer in silence for years.
The kind of person who never asked for anything.
The kind of person who gave and gave and gave until there was nothing left.
And he was telling you he was tired.
"I can't keep doing this," he admitted, his voice trembling slightly.
A tear slid down your cheek.
"Giyuu, please..." you begged softly, tears spilling over.
He laughed softly.
Not because anything was funny.
Because he was trying not to cry.
"I know your coffee order by memory," he said with a shaky smile.
You froze.
"I know you hate thunderstorms even though you pretend you don't," he continued quietly, his eyes glistening.
Another shaky breath.
"I know you always leave cabinet doors open," he said, letting out a weak, broken laugh.
Your vision blurred.
"I know exactly what kind of food you crave when you've had a bad day," he whispered fondly.
His eyes glistened.
"And I know when you're lying and saying you're fine," he finished softly, his voice thick with emotion.
Your chest hurt.
Badly.
Because those weren't romantic things.
Those were the things that came from loving someone for twenty years.
"I know everything about you," he said, his voice finally cracking.
Just once.
The smallest crack.
But it was there.
"And somehow I still don't know if you ever saw a future with me," he admitted with a broken smile.
The apartment fell silent.
You couldn't breathe.
Couldn't think.
Couldn't stop crying.
"I love you," he repeated quietly, his eyes locked onto yours.
His eyes met yours.
Red-rimmed.
Exhausted.
"I've loved you for so long that I don't even remember what it feels like not to," he said with a sad, exhausted laugh.
Your breath caught.
"But loving you like this..." he whispered.
He swallowed.
Hard.
His gaze dropped to the floor.
Then back to you.
"It's killing me," he admitted painfully, tears threatening to fall.
The words hung in the air between you.
Raw.
Honest.
Final.
You wanted to say something.
Anything.
Wanted to tell him you cared.
Wanted to tell him he mattered.
Wanted to tell him not to leave.
But none of those things were the answer he needed.
And he knew it.
The moment stretched between you.
Heavy.
Painful.
Final.
Then Giyuu nodded to himself.
As if he'd finally accepted something.
"I think I've been holding on to who I wanted you to be," he said quietly, forcing himself to smile.
Another tear rolled down your face.
"And that's not fair to either of us," he added gently.
He reached for his jacket hanging over the back of a chair.
Your heart immediately started racing.
"Giyuu..." you whispered desperately.
His hand froze.
For just a second.
You hated that pause.
Because some part of you knew he was waiting.
Waiting for the words that would make him stay.
Waiting for you to finally choose him.
Waiting for you to tell him he was worth the risk.
But they never came.
Not because you didn't care.
Not because you didn't love him.
But because you weren't ready.
And Giyuu deserved more than waiting for someone who might never be ready.
The realization shattered something inside both of you.
His shoulders sagged.
Just slightly.
Like the last bit of hope had finally left him.
Then he gave you a small smile.
The kind people wear when they're trying not to cry.
"I'm sorry," he said softly, his voice barely holding together.
The words nearly broke you.
Why was he apologizing?
He was the one leaving.
He was the one hurting.
Yet somehow he was still apologizing.
Then he walked toward the door.
Each step felt unreal.
Like a nightmare.
Like something that couldn't possibly be happening.
Your best friend.
The boy who'd been beside you since childhood.
The person who knew you better than anyone.
The person you'd always assumed would be there.
Reaching the door, he stopped.
His hand resting on the handle.
For a brief moment, neither of you moved.
Neither of you breathed.
Then, without turning around, he spoke.
"I wish you the best, take care, Y/n," he said quietly, his voice breaking on your name.
The tears spilled over completely.
His voice broke on the last word.
Only slightly.
But enough.
Enough for you to hear it.
Enough for you to know.
And before you could answer
Before you could tell him to stay
Before you could stop him
The door opened.
Then closed.
And for the first time in nearly twenty years...
Giyuu was gone.
December arrived quietly.
Just like the rest of the year had.
One day became one week.
One week became one month.
And somehow twelve months had passed.
Twelve months without Giyuu.
No messages.
No missed calls.
No accidental run-ins.
Nothing.
At first, you'd expected to hear from him.
Not because of what happened between you.
Because of everything that came before it.
Years of friendship don't just disappear.
At least, that was what you'd told yourself.
You convinced yourself he just needed space.
A few weeks.
Maybe a month.
Then things would settle.
Eventually he'd text you something completely ordinary.
A photo of a stray cat.
A complaint about work.
A random question he'd normally ask without thinking.
Something.
Anything.
But your phone remained silent.
And slowly, painfully, you began to understand that it wasn't going to happen.
The realization didn't arrive all at once.
It crept in gradually.
Like winter spreading across a windowpane.
Until one day you looked around and realized everything had changed.
By December, the city had already transformed for the holidays.
Storefronts glowed with colorful lights.
Garlands hung from streetlamps.
Fresh snow covered the edges of sidewalks.
People rushed past carrying shopping bags and wrapped gifts.
Life continued moving forward.
Yours included.
At least from the outside.
You still went to work.
Still met friends for coffee.
Still paid bills.
Still smiled when people expected you to.
But some days it felt like you were living beside your life rather than inside it.
You were heading home from work when you saw him.
At first, you dismissed it immediately.
You'd done this before.
Caught sight of dark hair in a crowd.
A familiar coat.
A familiar posture.
And every single time your heart had embarrassed itself.
So you looked away.
Then looked back.
And froze.
Giyuu.
Your breath caught sharply in your throat.
A year.
It had been an entire year.
He stood on the opposite side of the subway platform.
Hands tucked inside the pockets of a dark coat.
Headphones hanging loosely around his neck
Head slightly lowered.
Waiting for his train.
For a moment, everything around you faded.
The overhead announcements echoing through the station.
The conversations of commuters.
The screech of metal against rails.
The rush of footsteps across the platform.
None of it registered.
Because after an entire year...
There he was.
Real.
Your stomach dropped.
Your eyes widened.
Before you could stop yourself, you took a step forward.
Then another.
Relief flooded through you so quickly it almost hurt.
Finally.
Finally.
Maybe this didn't have to be the end.
Maybe enough time had passed.
Maybe the distance between you could be crossed.
Maybe…
Then Giyuu looked up.
And saw you.
You stopped walking.
The hopeful smile beginning to form on your lips faltered.
His expression didn't change.
No surprise.
No shock.
No visible happiness.
Just recognition.
Like spotting someone from another chapter of his life.
Someone familiar.
Someone he used to know.
Your heart sank.
For a second, neither of you moved.
The space between the two platforms suddenly felt impossibly wide.
Then Giyuu offered a small nod.
Polite.
Courteous.
Distant.
The kind of greeting exchanged between two people with history but no present.
You stared at him.
Because everything about him looked familiar.
The dark hair.
The blue eyes.
The calm posture.
And yet somehow he felt completely different.
Not because he'd changed.
Because he no longer belonged to your life.
The approaching train announced itself with a distant rumble.
Wind rushed through the station as headlights appeared down the tunnel.
Your pulse spiked.
"Giyuu."
The name escaped before you could stop it.
Soft.
Breathless.
Almost pleading.
His eyes met yours again.
And for a brief moment, something flickered there.
A faint softness.
A memory.
Not longing.
Not regret.
Just acknowledgement.
A quiet understanding of who you had once been to each other.
Then he smiled.
Small.
Gentle.
Kind.
And devastatingly distant.
The smile of someone wishing another person well.
Nothing more.
Nothing less.
The train slowed beside the platform.
Its doors slid open with a mechanical chime.
Passengers stepped off.
Others stepped on.
And Giyuu turned toward the train.
He didn't hesitate.
Didn't linger.
Didn't look like he was fighting himself to leave.
He simply stepped inside.
Like it was the easiest choice in the world.
The doors began to close.
For one final second, your eyes met through the glass.
Your chest tightened painfully.
But Giyuu only offered one last small smile.
Then the doors shut.
The train pulled away.
And you remained where you were.
Frozen.
Watching the cars disappear into the tunnel.
Watching the space he'd occupied only moments ago.
Your expression crumpled.
The ache in your chest spreading until it felt impossible to breathe.
It was strange.
You'd spent an entire year missing him.
But standing there on that crowded subway platform, the pain felt different.
Clearer.
Sharper.
Because for the first time, you understood what had happened.
You hadn't lost him that night.
You hadn't even lost him when he walked away.
You'd lost him little by little.
With every unanswered feeling.
Every moment he waited for something you couldn't give him.
Every time he chose you while you couldn't choose him.
Until eventually there was nothing left for him to hold onto.
The realization hit harder than you expected.
Harder than the silence.
Harder than the loneliness.
Harder than watching him leave.
Because a year ago, some part of you had still believed he'd come back.
Not as your boyfriend.
Not even as the man who loved you.
Just as your best friend.
Because that was what Giyuu always did.
No matter how far apart you drifted.
No matter how much time passed.
He always found his way back to you.
Except this time he didn't.
And now you finally understood why.
He wasn't coming back.
Not because he hated you.
Not because he'd forgotten you.
But because he'd learned how to live without you.
The station remained busy around you.
Announcements echoed overhead.
Commuters hurried past.
Another train arrived.
Another departed.
Life continued.
Just as it always had.
And standing there among thousands of strangers, you realized something devastating.
The boy who had spent nearly his entire life beside you
Yolo! May I request a muichiro x reader where reader likes to be carried around? She just doesn't want to use her legs to travel to places (being lazy) so she latches or jumps into his arms with every chance she gets! Thank you!
🌫⊹˚₊"𝐂𝐥𝐨𝐮𝐝 𝐍𝐢𝐧𝐞."⋆｡°🐨
───────୨ৎ───────
₊°ᗢ₊˚✧☕Writer's Note: stop I love this😭 this was fun to write, enjoy!
Starring: Muichiro Tokito.
Includes: lazy!hashira!reader, fluff, other hashira mentioned.
───────୨ৎ───────
It had become a running joke in the Demon Slayer Headquarters.
Every time someone saw you, you weren’t walking. You were in Muichiro’s arms.
Sometimes bridal-style, sometimes piggyback, sometimes you just launched yourself at him mid-conversation and expected him to catch you (he always did, no hesitation).
“[Name],” Shinobu said once, eyebrow twitching when she spotted you in the courtyard. Muichiro was walking casually, like he was taking a stroll through a meadow, while you were draped over him like a princess. “You do have legs, don’t you?”
“Yes,” you replied matter-of-factly. “I just don’t feel like using them.”
“…You’re a Hashira.”
“And?”
Meanwhile, Muichiro blinked at the Insect Hashira, tilting his head like he didn’t see the problem.
“She doesn't bother me,” he said simply. “She's light.”
You melted dramatically against his shoulder. “SEE? My sweet, sweet cloud understands me.”
Shinobu gave up.
It wasn’t just laziness, though—it became your favorite form of affection. Whenever you needed comfort, or when you just wanted his attention, you’d sidle up to him, hop, and cling like a stubborn cat.
The first time you actually jumped into his arms, Muichiro didn’t even flinch. He caught you instantly, arms snug under your thighs as if he had been expecting it.
“You could’ve fallen,” he’d said calmly, eyes drifting toward the horizon.
“You would’ve caught me.”
He blinked, then gave a small nod. “…Yeah. I would’ve.”
That was the end of that. You had free transportation forever.
Other Hashira reactions?
Sanemi: “FOR GOD’S SAKE, WALK LIKE A NORMAL PERSON!” (you blew him a kiss while Muichiro just blinked in confusion).
Rengoku: “AH! TRUE TEAMWORK! INSPIRING!!” (he then offered to carry you if Muichiro ever got tired. Muichiro deadpanned: “I won’t.”).
Tengen: “That’s not flamboyant enough. At least make him spin you while he does it.”
Muichiro’s only reaction through all of this was his usual serene look, but deep down, he didn’t mind. He liked the warmth. He liked that you trusted him enough to literally throw yourself into his arms without warning. And though he wouldn’t say it out loud, he’d gotten so used to it that walking around without you clinging to him felt strangely empty.
One night, you were curled up in his lap under the stars, head resting against his shoulder.
“You know,” you murmured, “you really don’t mind carrying me everywhere?”
He looked down at you, eyes soft in the moonlight. “No. I think it’s nice. It’s… peaceful.”
You grinned sleepily, wrapping your arms tighter around him. “Good. ’Cause I’m never using my legs again.”
He gave a tiny huff of laughter, pressing his chin against your hair.
“…That’s fine. I’ll carry you.”
And he meant it. For as long as you wanted.
🌙 Extras! (Headcanons)
Muichiro doesn’t even hesitate anymore. You could be three feet away or halfway across the garden—if you leap, he will catch you, zero questions asked.
Sometimes he’ll quietly reposition you if you’re not comfortable. You’ll be like: “Wait, why’d you—” and he’s just like: “Your arm looked squished. Now it’s better.” 🥺
If you fall asleep while being carried (which you always do on long walks), he’ll instinctively slow his pace, making sure not to jostle you. He looks like a walking weighted blanket provider.
He’s not outwardly clingy, so carrying you around is actually his secret love language. He gets to be close without saying it out loud.
Lowkey… he memorized the exact strength it takes to carry you comfortably. Like he knows your weight down to the decimal. Scientist Muichiro arc.
If anyone suggests you’re being “lazy,” he’ll just tilt his head and say: “No, she's just like being carried.” End of argument.
You once tried to sneak-attack jump onto him while he was distracted. He caught you without even looking and went, “Hi.” You almost screamed.
The other Hashira made a betting pool: “How many times today will [Name] leap into his arms?” Rengoku is the undefeated champion at guessing.
Sanemi: “YOU’RE A HASHIRA, ACT LIKE ONE!”
You: “I am acting like one. I’m delegating the walking to my assistant.”
Muichiro: “I’m not an assistant. I’m her ride.”
Once you were clinging bridal-style and Muichiro absentmindedly climbed a tree. Everyone panicked but you were just chilling like: “We are evolving past the need for ground.”
Tengen told Muichiro he should start charging you like a rickshaw. Muichiro didn’t get the joke and actually asked you if you wanted to pay him. You were like: “Pay you? Angel eyes, I am the prize.”
When you get dramatic you’ll just scream “CATCH ME” across the room and dive. He hasn’t dropped you once. Mitsuri swears it’s true love.
You 100% pretend the floor is lava in front of him just so you have an excuse. He plays along with a completely straight face like: “Ah, dangerous terrain. I’ll carry you.”
༄ synopsis: aang breaks his promise to you, but spends an entire night doing everything in his power to make it up to you.
༄ tags/warnings: contains explicit smut mdni 18+, you and aang are newlyweds, heavy angst, a yearnful aang (ultimate weakness), soft!dom aang, unprotected!sex (aang: “pull out? why? don’t you love me?”), mock sympathy, some nasty passionate missionary, praise (mostly male!receiving), body worship, manhandling, oral!sex/female receiving (ugh just love an eater that eats for his pleasure), good ol’ fashioned grinding, aang becomes a glow stick yay!, headboard!breaking, improper use of air and fire bending, basically you two get in a fight kiss make up and start repopulating the air nomads, pregnancy!mention, fluff at the end, brief mentions of zutara & sukka!pairing (pls don’t bring any ship wars over here i just want aang for myself), contains elements from the legend of aang movie (so beware of spoilers if you haven’t seen it!)
༄ author’s note: crazy how a bald pretty boi can make me come out of retirement after a 5 yr hiatus… this must say some things about me. (but i mean, aren’t we all still stuck on him going “i’m the last airbender” ? like we can start repopulating right now–) ahem. uhhh anyway! tbh, i haven’t written nor posted a thing for some yrs now so i’m extremely rusty. not to mention this is my FIRST atla fic ever (pls go easy on me. im an og fan, just never written anything for the fandom heh…) eng is also not my first language sooo if you see any mistakes or if anyone’s a bit ooc, just pretend you don’t see it and enjoyy xxx
w.c: 28.1k no beta. we die like my social life.
“you don't have to promise me the moon or the stars, just promise me you will stand under them with me.” – danielle p.
“It’s just one month. I’ll be back sooner than you think! No. Hmm…that’s not right... How about, sooner than you can blink!”
“Aang…”
“Trust me, you’ll see.”
“Promise?”
“As the Avatar and as your husband, I promise to come back to you. Don’t worry.”
At least, that was what Aang had told you.
But that was two months ago without a word from him since.
Republic City was many things. Boring was not one of them.
The capital was full of life. It had its usual hustle and bustle from lively merchants advertising their businesses, mischievous children darting through the streets, and the abundance of song and dance that carried through the city as the sun dipped below the horizon.
Daylight was quickly giving way to twilight, and it was thanks to the lanterns that littered the streets that helped you follow the path further into downtown.
Republic City held undeniable beauty during the day. It was a city of life and wonder where all things were made possible, but it was towards nightfall when it was truly able to shine through.
The people of the city twirled to the ratta tap beat of the music, clearly enjoying the presence of one another. They were free to love who they wanted, benders and non-benders alike, and could live however they so chose. In hindsight, it wasn't much but it was reason enough for them to express their happiness and gratitude through singing and dancing.
You were merely thankful that Katara had agreed to stay back and live within the capital instead of with her father and brother at the newly established Southern Water Tribe. She was a part of the city council, like you were, and was your closest friend. If she wasn’t here, you weren’t sure what you would have done without her.
In fact, that was where you were headed now.
Her home was only a couple of blocks away from yours and your husband’s, which you were very thankful for. Even though Republic City was, more or less, safe within its own measures, there was still crime here and there. People that stole from the market square and ransacked shop owners. Not to mention the fact that the Denied remained a pressing issue. It was why Aang never liked when you would leave after dark by yourself. It was dangerous. Even though he could be a bit overprotective at times, he meant well and was right.
Truthfully, that was what made having Katara live so close by such a relief.
Subconsciously, your arms stiffened around the warm basket of food that you cradled against your chest as you moved quickly through the dimming streets.
When you turned another corner, your eyes gleamed, looking up at the towering building in front of you. Katara’s home was three stories high, and had several lanterns strung up. It was a lot of space for just one person, but she tended to have company over so it was actually quite convenient.
You could smell the fresh scent of jasmine and the warmth from the hearth inside. You didn’t waste another second and stepped up to the door, giving it a clean knock in three’s.
A few seconds went by before the door swung open. When her familiar face peeked from behind the door, a smile quickly found its way to yours.
“Hey! Took you long enough. Get caught up in all of the usual festivities?” Katara teased, giving you a fond smile back before she pulled you into a hug.
Not giving you a moment to respond, she ushered you in and closed the door behind her.
“Sorry about the mess. I’ve been moving some things around. Sokka said he’s bringing some things from home and begged me to make room so–” She spread her arms out to show her progress with a sheepish smile. “I made room.”
Katara had a unique style about her that was unlike anyone you had ever met. She was creative and stylish, yet had this comforting homey feeling about the way she decorated her home—something that never failed to fill you with dread when it was time to part ways.
There were several pieces and such that were previously made sprawled around the large space. They were all from her home, things that meant something to her. Things that were given to her by the children in the villages, and trinkets that Sokka made for her. He liked to tell her that they would become useful someday. Usually, they didn't but she appreciated his little farewell gifts either way.
You could tell that some of it was put up, but it would seem that she’d managed to keep the more meaningful ones out in view. A beautiful pot of jasmines sat comfortably in the window that was near her balcony. They had been a birthday gift from you. Something for her to look after and care for while she remained apart from what was soon going to be her new future.
You were enlightened to know that the flowers were flourishing.
“Yeah,” you exhaled, catching her gaze. “A lot of room, I see.”
Katara shrugged, some of her long dark hair falling over her shoulder. “Well, you know. Sokka asks, I deliver.”
You hummed and nodded with a knowing smile on your lips as you followed the familiar path to the cooking area of her home.
“Oh, yeah. Of course. I mean, you making all of this space has absolutely nothing to do with your betrothed. The same one that is on his way here from the fire nation as we speak. No, no. Surely not,” you jested, settling the still-warm basket of baked goods down on a nearby surface.
You didn’t need to look over your shoulder to know that she had followed you with her lip fit between her teeth and that flustered glint in her eyes. She was easy to read whenever it came to her and Zuko’s relationship.
Speaking of which, it was never made clear when Katara and Zuko became a thing.
Toph once mentioned that it had happened a year or so after the hundred-year war ended. Sokka had taken a more…romantic approach. He preferred to remember it as love at first sight. Or, more knowingly when Zuko first arrived at the Southern Water Tribe, looking for the Avatar. Katara never bothered to correct nor deny either of them. When asked, she simply said,
“Zuko and I… Let’s just say that there was a mutual understanding between us, even as friends. Time is a funny thing. You really start getting to know someone when the world is ending. Or…beginning, I should say.”
At the time, you didn’t know him all that well but Zuko on the other hand…
“Katara is the moon, a light and beacon when the world around me got too dark to see. She has anchored me and I only wish to remain by her side, for as long as she will have me.”
Aang, on the other hand, was the most surprising one.
His support of their relationship had always confused you. Of course, you’d joined the group well after the war and the building of Republic City, but you became close enough to understand their dynamics and history together. His feelings for Katara was made out to be quite strong. Strong enough to see a future together. You could never understand what had happened between them and why they were not still together, but it meant little to you when you'd realized how happier they were apart.
Not to mention that, within a few months, Katara was going to be fire lady of the fire nation. Added that she would also continue to act as one of the council members for Republic City as well as back at the Southern Water Tribe.
It was clear, for both her and Aang, that there were no romantic feelings between them. They died the day they realized they wanted different things but, in place, something else was born.
A friendship that they knew would last several lifetimes over.
It was never like you needed the reassurance of knowing that they no longer had feelings for each other. It was never about that. You loved Aang, but always wanted the best for Katara. So it warmed your heart to know that she was happy.
She deserved it.
“Spirits, enough about me. We have to talk about you.”
Your expression fell a bit, feeling the color drain from your face. The last thing you wanted to do nowadays was talk about you. In fact, keeping all subjects away from you was what, somehow, helped make the days bearable.
Except, Katara had this way about her that wasn't exactly intrusive because she cared about you and could feel when things were off with you. However, she tended to meddle more than you wanted. Especially when she knew that something was wrong, even if you promised her differently.
And well, she was never exactly wrong. It wasn't as if things had been all that great since...
“If this is about Aang, then–”
“Yes. It is.”
You paused.
"Katara.”
“Come on–”
“I honestly would prefer not to really talk about it.”
There was a sharp finality to your tone that made Katara give you a puppyish look. You let out a heavy breath, feeling exhaustion seep into your bones like it'd belonged there. Then again, did it not?
At least it made you feel something other than hurt or angry.
“Aang does this all the time," Katara tried to reassure you. "He’s the Avatar. He’s a busy guy. A lot of people are counting on him to help keep the balance of the world. Without that and peace, I’m not sure where things would be right now. There’s also a lot of people that need him–”
“And I don’t?”
Your interruption made her stop and blink.
You should've stopped it then and there, but there was an impulse inside of you. It felt like it was trying to claw its way from your throat, and you weren't able to catch it in time.
"I know the Denied are an issue and I knew that there were going to be people that would need his help along the way but it’s been two months, Katara. No letters, no word. I don't even know if he's okay or not. I don't know anything, and that’s what hurts me the most."
The silence between you and her managed to smother the sounds of the crackling hearth from the other room. The longer that you stood in silence, the easier it was for a wave of regret to burrow itself down deep into your chest.
There was nothing that you loved more than being by Aang’s side and supporting him through all of his endeavors. This was his purpose, his reason for existing. You knew this, and yet—
You knew how that had sounded. It was…selfish, on a grand scale of things. Aang was the Avatar. He was who the people of the world depended on the most, even for the most minute of reasons. If they called, he answered, always. But, for some reason, the importance of who he was—
It was taking a toll on you.
“Sorry. That was completely unnecessary.” You turned and pressed your back against the edge of the counter, your eyes glued to the floor. “I don’t know. I shouldn’t have said anything.”
“No,” Katara shook her head, and walked over to place a gentle hand on your arm. She sighed. “You don’t need to apologize. You have every right to feel the way that you do.”
When you looked up, you were met with soft cerulean eyes that gave you more reassurance than you felt you deserved.
“You love him and miss him, a lot. I know the feeling. So don’t invalidate yours by apologizing for something that you can’t necessarily control.”
“I do,” you agreed, fighting the inner turmoil within you. “I do love him, but that still shouldn’t excuse how I’ve been feeling. He’s out there, alone. Sure he can handle himself but he’s...”
A sting to your eyes, a burn to your nose and suddenly your vision started to blur. It only frustrated you more because there was nothing worse than feeling sorry for yourself than crying when you felt you were wrong.
“To me, he’s not the Avatar, Katara.”
You looked at her, ignoring the way your unshed tears made you see the look on her face.
“He’s my husband, and I want him home. I don’t care about the Denied or any other group of criminals. I just want Aang home.”
Katara felt her heart tug down to the shallows of her stomach.
“Hey…”
She pulled you into a hug, feeling your tears dampen her shirt.
“I know,” she nodded. “I know.”
Because if anyone could understand where you were coming from, it was always going to be Katara.
For the past two months, Aang had been on a long and arduous mission somewhere in the Earth Kingdom trying to find out more information on the exact location of the Denied.
Within the last year, there had been several reports that began to surface across entire villages within the Earth Kingdom that were quietly siding with the Denied. Murmurs of a mutual understanding and rebellion against the benders of the world. There were also reports of supply routes disappearing and the Earth Kingdom officials who were being threatened or worse, vanishing completely. No one knew who was leading them, only that they were growing bolder and larger.
Aang was analytical. He knew that they never tended to stay in one place for long so he figured that if he could find their hidden headquarters, he would have access to their current whereabouts or, at the very least, know their next move.
That was what his last letter said to you before they had stopped coming altogether.
Perhaps that was what aided the storm that had been brewing inside of you. The same one that had been creating a monsoon of thoughts and emotions that you would have normally swallowed down in favor of giving Aang your continued patience and support. Even from a distance now forced between the two of you.
And the thing was, you did understand. The Denied were becoming a very serious threat and you knew that he was truly the only one that could sort this without violence and penance.
Your husband was the Avatar, the most important man on the planet. How much more selfish could you be?
“Thank you Katara,” you said and managed to give her a tender smile as you pulled back from her embrace, silently hoping that it was convincing enough to ease her worries.
“Now,” you sniffled, taking a breath. “I believe that we have a lot to talk about with this wedding of yours coming up. Wanna make the tea and I’ll plate some of the homemade sweet buns I brought?”
For a split second, Katara’s brows twitched inward. As if it had been the trick of the room's gentle glow, she smiled warmly and gave you a nod.
“Yeah. Sounds good.”
When you turned to do just that, her face fell.
She knew that look all too well. You were doing it again. You were letting that vulnerable part of yourself decide to crawl back into the cold shadows of your mind where you felt it was safest. It always hurt when you did it with her. She wanted you to feel safe enough to tell her how you felt and rely on her to help alleviate the pain you carried of constantly wondering if you were still a wife or now a widow. It was not easy, of course she knew that. But, still...
She watched you pull two serving dishes from the cabinet and place a few of the sweet buns onto them. When you turned to check on her, she made herself busy by snagging the tea kettle from a lower compartment and filled it with water. You sent her a smile from over your shoulder, and she noticed that it barely met your eyes.
Katara smiled back and turned around, sighing quietly to herself.
Aang, she spoke from the confines of her mind, shutting her eyes. Please come home.
After a rather long talk about wedding plans, council member work and bellies full of a few sweet buns and tea, the sky completed its final cycle and descent into nightfall.
It was time to head back home and just like every night since you were left alone, you dreaded it.
Without Aang, home no longer felt like home. It lacked the warmth and luminance that your lively husband tended to bring with him. Where it felt as though the sun encompassed the space, once he was gone, he left behind a cold and dark cloud that seemed to engulf everything within reach. Like a black hole that only knew how to consume until there was nothing left.
The thought of having to return back to that only made your stomach turn. He should be here. He should be home, with you.
But he wasn’t.
When you made it to the foyer of her home, you were pulled into another hug but tighter this time. Katara squeezed you as if she, too, knew what you were you going back to.
“Promise me that you’ll come back over the day after tomorrow,” She said, just above a whisper next to your ear. “Sokka’s going to want to see you and Zuko too. Honestly, not seeing you for a day will kill me but I have that council meeting about the trades from back home tomorrow…”
Slowly but firmly, you circled your arms around her form, giving her a promising nod.
“Don’t worry. I will.”
When you separated and walked out, you could feel pieces of her home trying to pull you back in. It also knew.
Katara sent you a small wave, and watched you disappear back into the streets of the city, headed down the familiar darkened path to what you still managed to call home.
As if the universe was aware of your desolate mood, it began to rain.
You couldn't help but stop where you were, craning your neck up to the sky. It started with a few drops along your cheeks until the rain fell in sheets, soaking you from head to toe. However, you didn't move. Not even when those that were leisurely walking the streets, likely going back home as well, gasped and jogged the rest of the way, seeking warmth and shelter.
It was the middle of fall, and it was raining. Usually the city would see a few snow-scares before winter finally came around but rain at this time of the year was rare.
A brief sigh left your lips as you closed your eyes, and continued to stand in the middle of the street, ignoring the feeling of your clothes sticking to you like a second skin. Then, you smiled.
Memories of the last time you were caught in the rain resurfaced and helped you remember one of the last moments that you'd had with Aang.
༄ ... flashback ... ༄
"What about this?"
Aang took a brief glance at you from over his shoulder before he released an airy breath.
"Not everything's going to be something worth taking back home, my love." He smiled and turned back to what he was doing.
You raised a brow, and studied the artifact for a moment.
Under the warm glow of a nearby lantern, you held up long, thin pieces of metal that were suspended at uneven lengths and had fading, almost smooth-looking air nomad glyphs carved onto them. There were some parts of it that had green weathering areas from decades of mountain snow and rain exposure while others had small dents along the edges. The metal parts were divided by tiny beads that were carved from pale wood and chimed quietly together when the wind stirred well enough. They produced a soft hollow sound. It was almost…haunting.
That was when you heard Aang shift to look at you again but this time, his face paled.
He sucked in a breath and held it as he turned to face you. His eyes were wide and on the chimes that you were still holding.
"Is that..."
You watched the way his fingers twitched at his side, almost as if he wanted to reach out to touch it but was afraid to.
"That's... Those are prayer chimes."
He moved closer to you, and finally raised a hand to gently brush along the dusty beads. His eyes were glossy, even under such poor lighting.
"The monks used to use these for mediation and mourning. I haven't heard the sound of these since before the war. Since I was a child."
His voice was barely above a whisper and if you weren't paying such close attention, you would've missed it.
When his eyes shifted onto you, your heart sunk.
"Oh, Aang..."
He brought a hand up to his temples and rubbed them before turning back around. Memories of his old mentor and best friend, Gyatso, surfaced.
Times where Aang would mediate with him and hear those same chimes from the archway of the room. How, on nights where it was difficult for Aang to sleep, the old monk would let him rest in his room while the soft ringing of the chimes lulled him to sleep, finally ridding his mind of the nightmares that ailed him.
Flashes of the past began to filter through his mind, glimpses of his old friend, of the children that he played with, of the joy and the laughter. All of it came rushing back, the dreams of his memories that had been haunting him every night were colliding with his waking mind. It was so surreal, he could hardly tell what was real anymore.
It was like they were there, all of them; he could hear them as if he was there again, back at the Southern Air Temple, enjoying his youth with his friends and the one monk that never saw him as the Avatar. Just Aang, a boy that met a worldly responsibility at an age where all that should have mattered to him was being a kid. In the face of what truly came to matter, he got scared and ran away.
If he hadn’t run away, if he had chosen to stay and fight what was inevitably coming, would his people have survived or would he have just died trying?
Aang knew that it was pointless to still dwell on. It was far too late now.
And it was because of this that he would always see himself as a coward, the coward that ran away yet still called himself the Avatar.
How foolish, and undeserving he was.
Without another thought, you gently placed the chimes back on the surface where you found them and slid your arms around his waist, holding him. You pressed your cheek against the warmth of his back, and closed your eyes.
"We'll take them with us. We'll take as much as Appa can carry, okay?"
You opened your eyes and tried to peek around Aang's broad form to see his face. You knew that he was crying. You saw it in his eyes before he looked away, and you could see it now. He was still covering his face, but you could see the traces of tears that started to fall. You could also feel him trembling, and not from the draft curling through the room.
It pained him to be here. It pained him to be in any of the air temples but more so with having you riding along with him. He never liked to show you the weakest parts of him, but being in these places... In the places that held the memory of his people that were long gone and only here through his own memories—it was a kind of pain that couldn't be put into words.
"I'm sorry," you heard him say, watching him shake his head. "This was meant to be a bonding trip for us. I didn't mean to ruin it by getting all sad and emotional."
Your heart nearly stopped. You pulled back just to turn him back around so that you could see him clearly. You reached up and pried his hands away, finding his teary eyes and red-splotched cheeks utterly heart-breaking.
You took his face in your hands, and rubbed away the falling tears.
"Never apologize for having emotions ever again, Aang, do you hear me? I can't bear it. You are allowed to feel exactly how you feel. No matter what emotion that is, it's okay."
He looked at you with such softness and vulnerability, it almost broke you into a million pieces.
"My love, we are two halves of a whole. I share your pain while you share mine. I know that you wanted to come here and show me pieces of your past, but please don't apologize when the memories get too much to bear. As your wife, I am meant to carry that weight with you. Never forget that."
A distant rumble of thunder shuddered and rattled around the old temple, causing some of the ancient wood to creak and groan. It coincided with the storm that simmered at the edges of Aang's mind. Yet, looking at you while placed into the delicate palms of your hands grounding him—he felt it all wash away. The darkness that filled him began to descend and retreat back into the shadows of his mind until all he could see and hear was you.
Aang lifted a hand to cover one of yours, giving you a warm and familiar smile.
"What would I do without you?"
"Mmm," you smiled back. "I don't know. Miss me?"
"You're right." He let out a low chuckle before he pulled you in closer, one hand on your waist while the other covered the back of your hand that was still against his face. His big grey eyes were back to their usual playfulness and you knew exactly what was on his mind.
"Aang, its going to storm soon."
"Mhm."
"Sooo."
He smirked, his eyes moving down to your lips.
"Sooo?"
You tried to hold back a roll of your eyes, but ultimately failed. He laughed as you sighed.
"You're such a handful, you know that?"
Aang lowered his head until his lips were just a breath away from yours. You could practically feel the smile on his lips as he said,
"Yeah, and you wouldn't have it any other way."
The moment that you took a breath, he wasted no time and pressed his lips against yours, swallowing it whole. You gave in and melted against him, moving your arms to wrap around his neck. You closed your eyes, and imagined a world where it was just you and him living endlessly, eternally bound to one another until the end of time and the life thereafter.
You knew that you did not hold the power to rewind time and bring all of his people back. But, what you did have was hope. You would help him build back what he had lost the best way you knew how and that was by focusing on what was still here rather than mourn what was now lost.
It started with you, him, and a lot of dusty old airbender relics…which had to be put on pause the moment that you felt his lips trail from the curve of your jaw to your neck.
"Aang," you whined.
"Shhh."
He switched places so that your back was in line of an old rickety table, and placed his hands at your waist to lift you up onto it. When it wobbled and creaked, both of you shared a wide eyed look before giggling together.
"If this comes down with me on it, me and appa will leave you here."
Aang chuckled lowly as he mapped his wide hands along your thighs, moving between them, close to the warmest part of you. His lips ghosted yours again as a mild distraction and without you noticing, he bended the air, parting your legs to slot himself right in the middle of them.
Your breath hitched when you felt him grip your thighs to pull you right up against him, feeling a desperate ache below your navel stir awake.
He hummed.
"Then I'll make sure I'm real gentle. Don't worry," and claimed your lips again, groaning at the muffled whine at the back of your throat with terrible plans of wrecking you and that feeble ol' table.
When both of you were finally dressed again and Aang told you that it was time to head back home, it began to pour with rain.
Before you and Aang had set out in search of ancient airbender relics at the old northern air temple, the sky was clear of clouds and any other indication of rain. Now, there wasn't a hint of blue left. There were just dark grey clouds and buckets of cold rain cascading down.
Once all of the old relics that the two of you could fit in your satchels were full, Aang whistled for Appa. The large bison roared in the distance and came barreling through the sky, landing a few feet in front of you.
"Come on, let's get back home before it gets worse!"
He took your wrist and tried to pull you along but was met with a bit of resistance. Worried and confused, he looked back at you with furrowed brows.
"Are you okay? What's wrong?"
There was nothing about you that alarmed him other than the way you were looking around. Well, then there was the apprehension in your voice too.
"I don't know, Aang. You know what they say about flying in storms like this. Plus, we're going to be soaking wet. I think I'll pass on that."
All of the tension that quickly coiled under his skin fell away. He smirked, quirking a brow.
"What? Scared of a little water? The same woman that managed to hold her own against a fire bender and a few lightning attacks? Who are you and what did you do to my wife?"
Without looking down, he felt your hand tighten around his. There was a new air of determination about you that made him fight back a smile. He always knew how to get to you. He just had to press the right buttons, and so he did.
"Let's go," you muttered and with a faint yelp from him, you tugged him out to Appa and saddled up. When you grabbed the reins and looked down at him wearing an impatient expression on your face, he finally smiled to himself.
"Yes ma'am," and used the air around him to push off on the balls of his feet up onto Appa as well, sitting right behind you. Even though both of you were soaked through, he still wrapped his arms around your waist, suctioning the front of his body against the back of yours. He felt you stiffen, and watched the way your hands gripped at the reins. He smirked again, and looked ahead. "Appa, yip yip!"
And then you were off, headed back home.
༄ ... end of flashback ... ༄
When the memory faded and you opened your eyes, you felt the wind begin to pick up, ruffling your clothes and the shutters on the houses around you.
It was definitely time to head back home.
Once you'd made it through the entrance, you made a face, finally feeling the heaviness of your clothes. Eagerly, you peeled off each article and hung them up in the entryway to dry. With each pad of your feet towards your shared bedroom, you left behind a trail of wet footprints that you made a mental note to clean up when you were all washed and dried.
As you stood underneath the copper rainfall-style pipe and let the warm water roll off of your body in steady trails, you could feel your mind begin to wander.
Weeks of waiting to hear back from Aang, and nothing. No letters from his wind-swallow messenger nor any word from any of your connections in the Earth Kingdom. Not even from the one person that would’ve sent you an update the moment she caught wind of his name. It wasn’t like you hadn’t tried to dig for information from Toph. She just didn’t have anything worth noting to give you.
It was nerve wracking having to wait. To worry and spend almost every single night curled up in a ball in a bed that no longer even smelled like him anymore. It felt like each day came to erase him, piece by piece, until time left you with nothing but what he was. Not as the Aang you'd come to know, but as the Avatar instead.
You had half a mind to set out to his last known location to search for him, but Katara stopped you before you could do it. She’d told you that she understood why you wanted to go, but that it wouldn’t help the situation. Especially if, when he did come back, he came back to an empty home and to the news that you were dead, thousands of miles where no one would ever find you.
You understood that it was not because you were weak or unable to handle your own out there. It was simply because there was not a single person alive that didn’t know who you were, unless they lived under a rock. Everyone knew you were the Avatar’s wife, which made you worth as much as Aang. It made you into a target.
Katara was truly your voice of reason; why you decided to stay put and wait instead. You couldn’t bear hurting Aang that way or ever at all. Plus, you were brave but you were not stupid either.
As painful as it was to sit and be patient, it was your only option.
When the water began to shift temperatures, you decided that it was best to finish washing up and finally get dry.
Once you stepped out of the stone-clad bathroom and into the main bedroom, it was hard to ignore the emptiness around you.
During Aang’s absence, you’d made several attempts at keeping the space well-kept and full of the same vibrance that he was so naturally gifted with. From leaving a few ancient nomad scrolls in one corner of the room to keeping an incense lit in the other. It was always the same scent. Cedarwood and Juniper. He’d once told you that it would help him quiet his thoughts. To rest his mind so that he could meditate in peace.
Your brows furrowed, staring at the meditation corner. Try as you might, but it would seem that dust was drawn to the places where he lingered the most. Maybe it was meant to haunt you worse than the memories and the nightmares. You see, dust was something that you could see. What your mind often conjured were things that you could blink away or distract yourself from.
Something physical, on the other hand…
It only served as a cruel reminder that you were alone and had been for a while.
Your feet crossed the room without much sound, flitting about the room like you were just remnants of a person; a ghost in your own home. Once your skin was dry and lathered in its usual oils, you spotted something from the corner of your eye. On the dresser rested a folded heap of orange and yellow fabric. Your heart clung to the cage in your chest as you took in a slow breath, and shuffled over. As delicately as you were capable, you pulled it down and watched it unravel before you.
It was one of Aang’s robes. It was one that he wore when he was at home and could shuck off his everyday wear to replace it with something that didn’t remind him of his duties as the Avatar. You’d made it for him one day, and he had worn it ever since.
When you rose it up to the tip of your nose, you could still smell bits of him.
“I just want to know that you’re safe. That’s all.”
Maybe Aang was safe, he just couldn’t send his messenger, but you selfishly wished that he would just so you could know something.
With a sigh, you placed it back in the same neat fashion the robe was previously in before dressing in your night gown. It wasn’t completely see-through but just enough to keep your skin cool from the hot temperatures of your shower and the mugginess luring in from the outside rain.
After you cleaned up the wet footprints from the entryway, you decided that another hot cup of tea would help you rest for the night. Or, at the very least, settle your cloudy mind.
Luckily, you still had some jujube-ginger tea left over from earlier in the morning and heated the kettle up atop the warming flame. It was going to be a few minutes so you crossed back into the common room for a moment, and opened a few windows along with the balcony doors. For a brief second, you stood there and watched the rain fall.
Aang always did prefer some of the windows opened, especially when it was nice outside and the wind was blowing. He loved the home more when there was fresh airflow coming through but with the rain, it felt cold; much like how everything else around you did.
With a sigh, you turned and chose to take a seat near the lowered table on a fluffed cushion. The silence was welcoming, but the emptiness was not. You brought your legs up so that you could rest your chin on your knees, and stared out at the balcony doors.
During the first week after Aang left for his mission, you started looking for him to come dropping back in on the balcony. The two of you had a wrap-around balcony but he preferred to come in where you could see him. So you would wait up, every night, until you began to realize that he wasn’t going to be coming back home anytime soon.
You’d told yourself that every week but when it got to be a month and a half, you stopped looking for him completely. You went about your days as if he was already gone and in a way, that was what it felt like. It felt like a loss, even though the better part of you knew that he was still out there.
Or, at least, you'd hoped so.
Hope was a funny thing sometimes but it kept you from doing something stupid like going out and finding him yourself, despite what Katara said. Who knows if you would like what you found anyway...
Still waiting for the whistle of the kettle, you shifted and was about to reach for a book you’d started recently reading when your eyes caught a few scattered pieces of half-rolled up paper on the table. Your brows furrowed, and reached for them instead.
When you unraveled one of them, you felt a wave of sadness crash into you. It was all of Aang’s letters to you. Well, the ones that he'd sent before they stopped coming.
You sifted through them until you came upon the first one he’d sent and sniffled, pulling a spare blanket over your legs as you started to read through them all over again.
༄ hey baby, it’s me! well…guess you already know that by the bird huh? by the time you read this, i’ll already be pretty close to the border of the earth kingdom. i wish i could give you more than that but you know how easily these letters can fall into the wrong hands. anyway, i miss you… so much. these past few nights have been so lonely without you… momo and appa would bite my head off if they could read this but it’s not the same without you
but i hope the necklace i gave you makes up for my absence, just until i get back yeah?
wait for me. i will be home, soon
– A
As you read through it, you'd subconsciously reached up and fiddled with the necklace that hung around your neck. It was the only piece of jewelry that you never took off, not even when you bathed. It was the only thing that you had left of him, other than his robe.
You didn’t realize that you were crying until you noticed a dark wet spot on the parchment. You cleared the tears away, and shuffled the papers so that you could read the next few.
༄ my love, my sweet love, how are you?
i got your letter, don’t worry, i just haven’t had time to get back to you because guess what? i found a clue on where they are! well, actually, sorry i forgot to mention that i’m here in the earth kingdom now and actually met up with toph. enjoyed seeing her again but sadly she didn’t have any info on you know who sooo, i went out and did my own digging and actually found something!
it was details about another hideout but it really feels like i’m getting closer which means i should be home soon! exciting right? to see your face again, to hold you and kiss you… it’s all i dream about. well, when i get to sleep that is. sleeping hasn’t been all that easy lately…
sorry that this letter is longer than the last. i’ll work on that. just got too excited to talk to you but i know we will talk again and next time, i hope to have better news. until then…
– A
Thankfully, the hearth in the common room you were in had still been on when you’d left earlier to go see Katara. It kept you warm as you sat there, on the floor, reading through old letters and reopening old wounds.
With another quiet sniffle, you moved on to the next and final one that almost made you break down while reading it.
༄ hi love.
i don't want to scare you but...momo isn’t doing well. i’m not sure when he started to feel sick or how or from what and i was close to turning back but he’s in toph’s care right now and i’m closer than ever on the group's whereabouts. appa is doing ok, don’t worry. me on the other hand…
it’s been storming a lot here. you know i’m not a big fan of storms but even without you here to keep me calm, i’ve been managing.
i want to come back home. i really do. it’s all i think about now but i know i cant. i have to make sure this group is no longer a threat to our home, to you. you understand that…right?
pls don’t give up on me. i WILL be home soon. i made you that promise didn’t i? do you still believe in it? pls say that you do.
i do…
i can’t say when i will be able to write to you again but hopefully you’ll see me in person so we won’t have to rely on these little pieces of paper.
i love you. so much. you are my heart and my everything. i know i have already asked so much of you but pls continue to wait for my return.
talk soon,
– A
Before you knew it, you were sobbing.
Horribly.
The letters were scattered around you when you tugged the blanket up to your face, crying into it. It felt like your heart was breaking into two all over again. Every part of you felt hollow and in so much pain, you could hardly move. Your body shook and trembled, curling into yourself until you felt like the smallest thing in the room.
The battle of knowing that Aang held the world on his shoulders as the Avatar but doubled as your husband and was only trying to do what was right, weighed heavily on you. It felt silly to be so upset just because you missed him but you also knew that it was not only that. It was how worried you were for him. He was never someone that would not communicate, even if it was just a two-sentence letter. What if something really did happen to him? What if you’d spent all this time crying and being angry at him when there was a real possibility that he might have been…
You shook your head and dug your fingers into your legs, pushing your face further into your knees. No, you told yourself. Aang was fine. He was strong and more than capable of taking care of himself. He’d fought many to make Republic City into what it was. He’d even fought a spirit just to fight for his claim over the land itself. Even through the times that he lost, he got back up and kept fighting until he won.
That was your Aang. That was the man that you fell in love with and trusted more than anything. He told you to wait. He promised that he would return to you. You knew this and believed in it, in him.
So why were you doubting him now?
Was it the absence? The unknowing of where he was and if he was really okay? The cut of communication and no information from Toph? The same person that Aang said he'd seen in his letter to you before he had just...disappeared?
You tried to rationalize some of your thoughts before they got too dark. Toph, more than likely, didn't give you any deep information on his whereabouts because it came in a correspondence and was not a conversation that was done in person. You remembered that letters were intercepted all of the time. It did no one any favors for outsiders to know that the Avatar was gone and had left his defenseless wife, at home, all by herself.
Toph was looking out for you and her friend, Aang. It was the only thing that made sense.
You gave yourself a few more moments before you decided to light one of the incenses that Aang used, if not to breathe and bring you momentary peace. Once that was done, the tea kettle squealed hot on its open flame, grabbing your attention. When you gathered the letters and placed them back on the table, you went to check on the tea.
As you poured yourself a cup, the aroma whirled around the space and blended with the scent of the incense, calming your mind and your body in one. For a moment, you allowed yourself the opportunity to think of nothing. To stand in place, and just breathe.
The one thing you’d forgotten to do in your husband’s absence was meditate. Frankly, it was something that you did together. You knew it was often best to do it alone, but you loved being near him in a pocket of silence to sit, breathe, and feel the things around you. He once told you that meditating was not always a way to connect with his past lives. He mostly did it for himself. To ground himself when he needed it most.
Aang was far from perfect. He had just as many flaws as the next person and knew, through meditating, he could find himself again. Especially during his hardest moments.
You wondered if he ever found the chance to meditate while being away. If there was time for him to just be alone with his thoughts and connect back with the air around him. To try and reach out to you the way you’d tried with him in your dreams.
The thought pulled a smile from you. You pictured him sitting in a cross-legged fashion, fists together with a particularly concentrated expression on his face before it turned into a cute pout. Maybe the demands around him kept him from truly being able to focus. Upon people seeing him, there was no telling what kind of side quests he was put on. It was like him to get sidetracked in favor of helping those that needed it along the way.
You took the opportunity to splash a bit of cool water onto your face to subdue any puffiness that might come from your earlier moment of crying and took your tea back into the common room, crossing out to the balcony.
The rain had lightened to a soft pitter-pat with a few rumbles of thunder in the distance. It would seem that the worst of it was well over and left behind a soft soothing ambience to close out the night.
You were appreciative. The rain never bothered you. In fact, you enjoyed storms. It provided enough noise to shut out the bad thoughts, and it tended to fill the home in a way that made you feel less alone.
As soon as you were about halfway through your cup of tea, you set it down and glanced at a few pots of flowers next to you. Your eyes softened. Wind lilies. On one of your first trips out to the Southern Air Temple, there were only a few left that were healthy enough to take back with you and since then, they’d been thriving wonderfully. It was only due to your frequent tending that they had managed to survive for so long. Still, most flowers, especially brought from one region to live in another, would struggle to acclimate to a different climate. These, on the other hand…
“Thank you for sticking it out with me,” you bent to meet the lilies eye to eye, smiling. “My little troopers.”
Moments of Aang struggling to remember to water them half of the time almost made you giggle. He had many talents, but tending to flowers was definitely not one of them. Funny, considering he was the master of patience. However,
“C’mon,” Aang whined, half of his lumbering body hanging across the balcony railing. “You know I’m not good at that stuff. Flowers require too much work.” You smiled, rolled your eyes and continued watering them. He then grinned and made his way over to you, wrapping his arms around you. “Not that it matters when they’ve got such a good mama to do it though, huh?”
“Aang, you’re impossible.”
“Yeah,” he chuckled, lips against your neck. “I know.”
A sigh left your lips as you studied the flowers a bit closer. There were a few dead leaves that needed trimming and you decided that since you were having some trouble sleeping and was waiting for the tea to kick in anyway, why not cut them now? So, you grabbed a pair of brass trimming shears that were near the flower pots and got to work.
The tranquility of the soft rain, the surrounding city lanterns and the smell of the wind lilies filled your chest with a warmth that you hadn’t felt in a while. You were not often rewarded with nights like this. The ones where you weren’t constantly being haunted and tormented with dreams that would urge you awake, night after night. No, this was one of those nights where you'd almost felt at peace with yourself. Where being at home didn’t feel as though it was draining you. Things almost felt…right.
So, you allowed yourself this momentary feeling of freedom from it all and started to hum as you trimmed, remembering a tune from your childhood. In the stillness of your mind, you'd missed the way the air shifted around you. A breeze that was not there moments ago was now brushing at the ends of your hair like a familiar touch that you’d become unfamiliar with.
Gentle as a breeze, and unbeknownst to you, Aang landed on the other side of the western curve of the balcony that was near the bedroom. He closed his glider, set it to the side, and stepped inside while being as careful and as silent as he could. In truth, it was never very difficult for him. He tended to walk as if his feet hardly ever touched the ground, but he could feel the exhaustion creeping up on him.
It had been a long and grueling journey back home.
Momo finally started to feel well enough to travel so once Aang was able to settle things back at the Earth Kingdom, he knew that it was time to head back. For the first few hours, he had been overly excited. He was coming back home, coming back to you, his sweet little wife, but with the lack of sleep and all of the stress that he had underwent—it was no wonder his footsteps landed on spots in the wood flooring that they normally would not have. They creaked underneath him but he figured that you were probably deep in sleep and wouldn't notice.
When he finally rounded into the bedroom, he discarded all of his damp clothing and slid on a pair of warm loose sleeping pants that he let hang low on his hips. He was fully prepared to slip into bed and cozy up next to you when he noticed that the bed was made as if you hadn't slept yet. It was strangely untouched, almost as if you'd never even acknowledged it at all. Were you not home?
Sporting a small pout, Aang peeked his head into the washroom but was met with the same silence and darkness he'd walked into when he came in.
Softly, he called your name as he moved towards the kitchen area and...nothing. He frowned, but wasn't at the stage of concerned yet. Especially since there was clearly a warm kettle of tea that was left on the warmer. He brushed the back of his hand against it. He was right. You couldn't have made the tea that long ago, so you were close by. He was sure of it.
He was always good at finding you. That was never a problem.
It just helped when he could...cheat a little.
When he stepped into the common area, he circled his fingers through the air, bending the flow of the current to his will so that he could feel for your presence. Since the windows and the balcony doors were open, it was easy for air to travel through the home and wind throughout, being able to cover the entire upper floor before he took his next breath. Suddenly, the torrent of air stopped. His eyes widened, and a warm smile curved at his lips.
There you were.
Before he could walk out to the balcony to you, he heard the sound of paper shuffling to the floor. Curious, he turned and saw what was there. He bent at the knees and with a crease to his forehead, his eyes swept over the pages.
Letters. His letters to you.
Even though he remembered what he had wrote to you, he read over them, ignoring the way his chest flooded with a sinking feeling. They were hard to read, being back home now. He'd missed you, a lot, but didn't want to even imagine how his long and silent absence affected you.
He sighed and dropped his hand, still holding the letters. His eyes traveled over to the hearth that was still aflame, and felt a chill along his naked spine. Maybe he should have rushed the mission. He knew he needed more information on the Denied but was all of it worth it in the end? If you were still up at this late hour and was drinking jujube-ginger tea while rereading all of his letters...
He had been wrong.
He'd told himself that you understood what he needed to do, who he was to the people of the world. You knew he was the Avatar. He had a duty to protect the people and the balance of all nations but more importantly, you.
So did you not understand? Did you pretend to when he first told you that he loved you and wanted to be with you for the rest of his life?
All he wanted was to make sure that the world stayed safe enough for you to live in. It was never like you asked him to take on that responsibility, but he couldn't sleep at night knowing that you were constantly surrounded by danger when he knew that he could do something about it. You deserved what he had to fight for, and that was peace.
But could it really be at the cost of causing you so much pain and unrest?
Suddenly, he was afraid to face you. It felt like judgement day.
Still, no matter what, Aang had to see you. He'd let you cry, scream and hit him if it made you feel better. He just wanted to lay eyes on you. Maybe hold you, if you'd let him. Spirits, he hoped so...
With a firm resolve set in his jaw, he gently placed the letters back on the lowered table and quietly made his way out onto the balcony where you were still chipping away at dead leaves.
Even though you had no bending abilities, you were still able to feel when something...was off. It was like a shift in the air, a turn; a difference. It brushed against your skin like a breath waiting to exhale.
As noticeable as it was, it still didn’t prepare you for what came next.
"You're still awake."
It was as if the world had gone quiet. The rain, the wind chimes, the distant hum of the city below—it all faded into nothing. Even the air in your lungs had abandoned you.
It couldn’t be…
It wasn’t—
But you didn’t turn to look. You didn’t even blink.
Instead, you held your breath and counted down the seconds, hoping that you weren’t having another waking nightmare. Your mind could be terribly cruel that way. It’s enjoyed making you suffer the long and lonely days and nights with your husband gone, tormenting you with memories and phantom touches of his fingers across your skin. It had this peculiar way of creating illusions that it knew you yearned for, if not to silence the thought of losing him.
Aang.
It was him, you knew it. Like the flowers in your palms, this was real; this, you knew. Except, the greater part of you couldn't bring itself to face him.
It was the months of waiting, of spiraling between anger and worry. It took from you until you had nothing left to give.
So, you said nothing.
You resumed snipping at the leaves, and ignored the sharp breath from behind you. By now, he must have realized. How could he not? You'd left things as they were; the bed, the tea, the letters... Oh, the letters. They were the worst. Surely he'd put the pieces together by now. Every fractured part of you was right there in front of him, painfully bare.
Aang had failed to realize the impact of his absence, but he could see it now.
Things were worse than he could've imagined.
After a moment of silence, he took a brave step forward, testing the waters. He let his footsteps create enough sound for you to hear him, but you did not react.
He stepped forward again, and was now close enough to feel your body heat against his own. His eyes assessed what he could see of you. They went from your tensed shoulders to each shallow breath that you took, and down to the rigid way that you were trimming the leaves. His face pulled into a slight frown. He wanted to reach out and touch you, but he wasn't sure how to go about it. You were upset, he could tell, so he wanted to tread as carefully as possible.
But moments like these were handled as they always were.
Aang grinned to himself.
He knew just how to fix this.
He started off by brushing his fingers against your arm, trailing up until they poked against your cheek. Of course, nothing, but he expected as much. He then placed his chin on your shoulder and continued to watch you before sliding his long arms around your waist, holding you against him. Curiosity stirred in his eyes and deep in his chest as he leaned into you, trying to catch your eyes. You were focused, and agonizingly silent.
Aang pouted.
He'd thought that he could fix this the ol' fashioned way.
Guess not.
"Baby... I'm home. I'm here now. C'mon," he closed his eyes for a brief moment, and grazed his lips against your neck. "Talk to me. Please."
He didn't move away, and neither did you. Your mind spiraled as you tried to ignore him. The part of you that was excited to have him back home, safe and sound, had been drowned out by what had lingered after he'd left you in a period of burning silence. You allowed yourself to feel angry, to feel hurt and abandoned because these feelings were coming from a place in your heart where only he occupied.
You didn't love easily. Falling for Aang happened over time. It’d started purely as adoration that eventually turned into something that you knew would ruin you.
It took work to get to where you were with him. He'd spent years pining and yearning after you, courting you with flowers and big gestures that ultimately ended with him proposing to you. You remembered it like it was yesterday. It was beautiful because he had done it privately, just the two of you. That was what made it special.
That was the moment that you'd truly fallen in love with him.
Aang had always been someone that provided you with love, affection, honesty and communication and, maybe, that had turned into your greatest weakness somewhere along the way. You'd fallen so deeply in love with him that a garden of selfishness began to grow. You'd accepted him as the pillar of peace and balance, but that acceptance slowly festered and turned into a nasty thought that wouldn't go away. It wasn't like he could stop being the Avatar. You knew this, but...
You were so selfish. You loved him. You loved a man that was now your husband but still had to give half of himself to a world that would always need him even when you felt you needed him more.
This confliction within you confused you. He needed someone that was willing to be by his side, accept his duties and still love him all the same. You just didn't know how to do that without wanting him all to yourself.
This love for him... It weakened you, and it exposed him. If he decided to choose you over the world one day, what would happen then? Would there even be a world for him to love you in? Would it not go back to the days of chaos and madness? The founding and building of Republic City would be for naught and would fall without his constant influence and protection.
Was it not better this way? To swallow your deepest and darkest feelings lest they come to light and destroy all that you and Aang had built for one another?
A pain twisted in the maze of your heart, settling like a rock in the ocean. Maybe the answer was simple. Maybe it was an answer you knew you wouldn't like.
You paused what you were doing, staring down at the shears clutched in your hand.
When you spoke, you felt his fingers twitch against your stomach.
"Welcome home."
Aang knew he should have been happy. You were talking to him again. However, it was not in the same way that he had become so greedily accustomed to. Your tone was flat, your body was stiff and you still weren't looking at him. His stomach felt twisted in knots. He must've really fucked this up.
The last time you were this upset with him was when he had told you that he was going to the fire nation for a briefing with Zuko and the fire nation council members. There was a border issue that needed addressing and the group behind the incident demanded to speak with the Avatar only. He'd promised you that it was not going to be long before he came back home, and that he would be careful. Except when he did come back home, he was in worst shape than when he'd left. It'd scared you and you told him how the thought of losing him made you feel.
That was the first time, since marrying you, that he'd come to truly realize how deeply and utterly in love he was with you. How it, too, would kill him if anything were to happen to you. It was one of the bigger reasons why he didn't mind being the Avatar. If it meant keeping you safe, then he would choose this path in each and every single lifetime.
Even if it meant having you angry and upset with him more often than not. Much like now, except this...this felt different. He wasn't sure how yet, but it did.
"I'm sorry..." he whispered near your ear, looking at the side of your face like a kicked puppy would. "I mean it. I know I made you worry, and I'm sorry. It won't happen again."
Those words...
It won't happen again.
But, it would, wouldn't it? And you knew why.
When he felt you untangle yourself from his arms and step back from him, he felt his body wash over with sand, pulling him down until it nearly suffocated him from the inside. Rejection sat heavy within him, too heavy for comfort. Then the frown on your face, the hurt in your eyes and the way you looked at him.
Spirits, he truly hated that look.
It made him inhale, feeling his head swell with an emotion that he couldn't quite place.
"Sorry?" You closed your arms around yourself, and shook your head. "No, Aang... You have nothing to apologize for. It's your duty, as the Avatar, to put the people first. The Denied needed to be taken care of. I...understand this now. It's fine. We're fine." Your eyes fell to the city beyond you, watching the rain scatter across shutters and the rocky pathways of the streets. "Just fine."
You could tell that he didn't believe you. Spirits, you didn't believe you. It almost made you cringe, but you tried to school your features to remain as neutral as you were able to.
"I don't believe you."
Your eyebrows twitched.
Aang stepped towards you, fully expecting you to step back again. When you didn't, he released a breath. Relief acted like a sedative to the rejection from a moment ago. Better, he thought.
"If you were fine, if we are fine, then you wouldn't still have that look on your face."
"What are you talking about?" You asked, your eyes finding his again.
The way he was staring at you now, it made you feel so exposed. You never could hide parts of yourself from him. He was very good at seeking them out and making you lay them all out where he could see them, plainly; openly. It unnerved you when you knew he was right to.
When he said your name, it was under his breath and there was a rhythmic tic in his jaw. He looked as if he was trying to keep his composure, but the shiver that ran down your spine could not be ignored. You swallowed, and pushed your teeth into your lip.
"Don't do that."
His tone dropped quietly, familiar in a way that unsettled you more than if he'd raised his voice. It sounded practiced, like something that was said to you during moments where he felt you slipping away from him emotionally, and instinctively reached out to pull you back.
Your breath stumbled over the next.
"Do what?"
His lips pulled into a half smile, his eyes darkening.
"Act like you don't know what I'm talking about. How long have we been doing this now? How many years have we danced this dance?" He took another step forward and you'd only realized, just now, that there was nowhere else to go. The closer he got, the more you had to bend your neck back to look at him. Was he always this broad and imposing?
"I know you," he continued, peering down at you, only a few inches from you now. "I know your ins and your outs. I know what you sound like when you're happy or when you're all sad and angry at me. Or..." He looked over you, finding the gown that you had haphazardly thrown on earlier to be quite...transparent. His smile turned into a smirk. He didn’t need to say it. You knew.
A breeze whirled between the overwhelming heat of your bodies, caressing the front of your gown, prompting your nipples to peak against the thin fabric. It was him; he was always the wind. An unnatural current of air that moved around you, against you. It shouldn't have been possible, but nothing was impossible for him. He knew you knew this. He tended to use that to his advantage, and sometimes it worked.
Another inhale, and you could feel a bit lightheadedness coming over you. Breathing should have made this easier. It did not.
Without knowing it, he was unraveling you, seam by seam. You could feel it.
There was no more fighting it.
"You always do this," you tell him, shaking your head. "You think you can say a few words to turn me on. Touch me a certain way and smile at me, and suddenly things are back to being okay between us. That's not going to work this time, Aang. I'm sorry but its not and maybe, that's how things should be for us."
You moved past him to go inside when you felt his hand close around your wrist, pulling you back. With a stumble, the front of your body collided into his. He searched your eyes for a moment, letting you stand in a pocket of silence before he spoke again.
"And what if I don't want things to be like this between us? I mean, I know I was gone for a while but I'm here, aren't I?"
He thought that he understood you. He thought that he knew you better than you knew yourself but again, he was wrong. How could he not see this part of you? A part of you that had been there, all along. Did he not know you the way that he thought?
“You don’t get it,” you let out a humorless sigh, struggling to process what you were hearing. “I was so worried about you, Aang. Do you know what it’s like to be so far apart from you and to not know whether you’re okay or not? I know you can always take care of yourself but I also know you’re not invincible. You like to make these rash decisions that put you in the most dangerous situations. So, not hearing from you for months and for you to just show up, out of the blue, thinking a bit of humor and soft touches just…fixes things?”
Aang’s hold on you tightened rather than loosening to let you go. It wasn’t like you were fighting him but you grounded him, even when you looked at him like he’d said or done something completely unforgivable.
Well…maybe he did.
In fact, the time that he’d spent not writing to you was time that he took to focus on his mission. He figured that the less time he spent on constantly writing to you and worrying you with every single detail that was going on, the more time that he would have to get what he needed on the Denied. The sooner he could return back home to you. Except…it would seem that no matter what decision he’d made at the time, it would’ve still been the wrong one.
Why couldn’t you see that? Why couldn't you understand that what he'd done, he'd done for you?
“So you’re saying that this is my fault?"
Your eyes widened in the reflection of his whirling grey ones, feeling your skin prickle as gooseflesh settled over it. The air around you whistled through the tension between you and him as if it was preparing for its final curtain call.
The ridiculousness of his question froze you.
Even the way that he was looking at you. Gone was the boyish gleam in his eyes and the soft touch of his arms around you. In its place were hardened eyes and rigidness in the palms of his hands. He did not release you nor did you look away.
“You say that like it’s a question.”
“Yeah, because it is.”
Your eyebrows furrowed with the hitch in your chest.
Breathing had never felt so agonizing.
“I don’t understand–”
“Yeah. I know. Me neither."
Finally, his arms dropped back to his sides and when he pulled away from you, it should’ve brought you a sense of relief. It did not. It only made you feel colder than you already were.
Calling him the Avatar…
You’d never done that before. In fact, he held nothing but memories of you seeing him as just your husband. He found that he didn’t like it. Not when it came from you, someone he loved more than anyone in the entire world and was comforted by knowing that when he came home, he could just be himself. Just Aang, without the weight of the world sitting heavy on his shoulders as the Avatar.
Aang sighed, and turned to face the railing of the balcony, eyes hard-set on the night covered city. His hands rested on the wood, gripping it until the whites of his knuckles pressed taut against his skin.
“Out there, I am suffocated by the world and its expectations for me. I know I’m not like other people. I have a duty, a responsibility to all of the nations to be this symbol of peace and be a protector of it but sometimes… Sometimes I regret ever being found in that iceberg.”
Despite the frantic thoughts that consumed you and screamed at you to say something, you forced it all back and chose to remain silent.
The lantern light stretched across his back, illuminating the tension coiled through his shoulders. The smooth but ripped skin moved against tendon as he let his head drop, and closed his eyes to let his body expel some of the tension that hid between the grooves of his shoulders and spine.
“I am tired, my love. So very tired and I have not even fulfilled half of what is expected of me.”
Finally you felt the pull to willingly move towards him, but your feet stayed planted where they were. He looked as worn down as he'd sounded. His slouched form, the bags underneath his eyes and the weight of responsibility that still sat on his shoulders. It almost made you feel bad for how you were acting. Almost.
“Aang,” his head turned to your direction but he did not look at you. It was enough. “I know the duty, as the bridge of both worlds, comes with a lot of weight." He winced, knowing what you really wanted to say. "I know that most days, you just want to spend them looking for more airbender relics at the air temples, but you have to think about the people. The world. They need you–”
“Why do you sound like Katara?”
You stopped, and blinked.
“What?”
Aang let out a heavier sigh this time, then fully turned back around to you, his dark brows knitted together.
“You sound just like her. I mean, what’s next? You’re going to tell me that I’m the Avatar? You don’t think I know that by now?” He asked you, gesturing a hand across the length of his body to point out the obvious. There was a new fire stirring in his eyes now, something you didn’t often see. He looked like he, too, was unraveling. “And what’s up with you calling me that anyway? Avatar. You never see me as just that so what’s changed? Is my absence the reason?”
He was talking too fast, saying too much. You couldn’t keep up.
He clenched a hand around the railing behind him, if only to steady himself. There was a storm brewing in those grey eyes of his. Fires that looked like it would take more power than you had to put out.
Maybe it had something to do with the way he was getting all defensive that made you finally snap back.
“Don’t pull that shit with me, Aang.”
Your chest heaved with each passing word, feeling the sting behind your nose and eyes. You didn’t want to get all emotional, but fuck it.
“You’re a hypocrite. You’re a fucking hypocrite and I’m sick of it. I know the things that you think but won’t say. At least, not to my face. How selfish I am with you. How I don’t care enough about the people, the cause. How I’m not supportive enough of you. Now I give you just that and what? Suddenly I’m a different person? That's bullshit, and you know it.”
For a moment, Aang allowed you to fill up the space with your anger instead of his. He practiced great strength in his patience and a certain level of understanding when it came to you. Usually, it was why things stayed good between the two of you. Naturally, there were differences. That came with the territory of being different people from different backgrounds.
Even so, he hated when things got like this between you and him.
“Don’t talk like that with me,” his tone was stern and curt, but still had that brush of calm that you tended to love about him. Except, this time, it was like the flood gates had opened. You couldn’t stop, even if you truly wanted to.
“I’ll talk to you however I want. You don’t own me, Aang.”
When you stepped closer to him, it was like you could physically see the way he was trying to hold himself back from reacting. His knuckles went white again and the dip in his brows deepened.
“This entire marriage with you has been so confusing. It’s been full of emotions that I never knew I had to prepare myself for. Had I known…” Your eyes fell away from his. “Maybe I would’ve… maybe I wouldn’t have…”
Before you could even think about how to finish that sentence, Aang was on you. One hand flew to your jaw, curling a few fingers under your chin to pull your gaze back onto his while the other hand tugged at your hip, pulling you against him.
Once again, you were suffocating in the aroma of everything that made Aang who he was to you. The scents were comforting, but it did nothing to thaw the ice corroding your heart now that you were forced to look at him.
Aang towered over you with ease, his back slightly curved and his wide yet still darkened eyes never left yours. He should’ve backed down. He should’ve let you speak, but knowing what you were about to say… It would’ve broken him into a million pieces. He would have much rather died than hear anything like that come from you. Easily.
“What is this, this fight in you? Where is this coming from? You’ve never been this angry with me. Have I really been gone that long?”
Your face twisted like there was something foul on your tongue.
“Why do you still not understand? This isn’t about the stupid mission–”
“Okay, then tell me.”
He searched your eyes again, frantically, hoping that he would find his answer there. No matter what, it was as if you'd closed him off. Not even through your eyes could he see what you were thinking. Another pang in his chest.
Your vision of him began to blur. When did you start crying?
“I think…I think I lo…” It felt like a rock was lodged in your throat. You swallowed what you could down, and breathed. "I think I love you too much, Aang, and that’s the problem. Katara was trying to tell me–”
“I knew it.” His face fell into a hard line, if that was even possible.
You sighed, shaking your head in his hold. “No, she was trying to help me–”
“Help ruin this marriage? Yeah, I’m sure she was just trying to help.”
With that, he started to pull away. This time, you were the one to pull him back.
“When did you start villainizing her?”
Aang glanced at you before dropping his eyes to the floor. The flex in his jaw was fluctuating now, as if it was trying to weigh what was morally right and what was wrong. Usually, he could keep a handle on his thoughts before speaking. It was easier that way because it kept him from saying something he knew he would regret.
If only he'd done that now.
“Since she started meddling in our marriage.” He peeked back at you from the corner of his eyes, frowning again. “Filling your little head up with crazy ideas and these…” He shook his head. “All of these misconceptions.” He looked away again, finding a new outlet for his anger and confusion. “I knew she wasn’t over it. I just had a feeling.”
At the mention of old wounds, you gripped at his arm, not realizing how your nails dug into his skin. He was too deep in his own thoughts to even notice.
“Are you serious?” At that, he met your eyes again and saw how he had made things worse for himself. “She’s your friend. How could you say that about her? And she’s engaged, for spirits’ sake!” His eyes flinched at your tone, feeling his heart drop. “Or did you forget that too?”
Aang knew he always had this way about him. How he tended to stuff his foot in his mouth, and didn’t realize it was there until it was too late to take it out. He’d messed up. Being gone without reaching back out to you in those few months was now the very least of his worries.
You let him go and ran a hand over your face, trying to reel your emotions back in before you also said something that you knew you would regret.
“Maybe we should head inside, and get to bed. It’s late. You just got home. I don’t want to fight any more than we already have.”
“I’m sorry.”
“It’s fine. Forget it,” you waved it off, letting out another sigh before you turned your back to him. “I’m tired. I just want to sleep.”
Aang’s shoulders deflated. All of the anger that he’d felt moments ago had dissipated into thin air. His body felt numb with too many emotions to place but the one that he couldn’t ignore was knowing that he had hurt you more than he ever had.
It wasn’t supposed to go like this. He was meant to surprise you, pull you into his arms and kiss you until sleep took over. He never wanted to fight with you, but this was worse than a fight wasn’t it?
Was the marriage itself on its last and final thread? How could he fix things from here or was it too late?
He should’ve let you walk through those doors. He should’ve let you retire for the night. He’d caused you enough hurt, it was understandable, but Aang started to realize another thing about himself.
He found it hard to watch you walk away from him.
As soon as you started to walk away, you heard a low thump. Worried that Aang had jetted off for the night, possibly off to sleep somewhere that wasn’t right next to you, your body swiveled around with your lips prepared to call out for him when you saw it. Saw him.
Your eyes lowered.
His knees were pressed into the floor, his head hung low and his hands were loosely balled into fists on his thighs. He didn’t say anything, but he didn’t have to. He looked defeated, like there was nothing else he could say to fix this between you and him.
So, he figured that the next best thing was to beg.
“Baby… Forgive me… I was out of line. Way out of line.”
His voice was so low, it was almost hard to hear him. You stood standing where you were, your arms by your side. You felt your heart melt in the worst way. He’d never done this before. Well, not in this sort of situation, at least. A man as powerful as him had decided that it was best to meet you on his knees rather than let his bruised ego get in the way.
All you could see was the dark blue arrow that led to his forehead. From his raspy tone, being on his knees and knowing that he was silently giving you back your power—it stirred something inappropriate between your thighs.
Inappropriate because was this really the time for this?
“I’m an asshole. I know that, and I haven’t been all that fair to you. I know that, too. As my wife, you understand what it means to stand by my side through the toughest of times and I love you for that but I have not really seen it through your eyes. I know it’s hard being the Avatar’s wife.”
He sighed to himself.
“Not to mention the fact that I kept telling myself that if I stayed focused on the mission, I’d get home faster. I'll admit, it was the wrong call and I realize that now. I stayed gone for months, and you got nothing. I…I understand how you felt.”
You sucked in a slow breath, and held it as you let him continue to speak.
“You want to be selfish but because you’re so kind, you feel guilty for it. Maybe…maybe Katara was right,” you watched the way his hands tightened back into fists. “You don’t know this but she’d once told me that I was holding you back. That you would be freer if I stopped being so selfish by keeping you here. She thought of you as a caged bird and I’ll be honest,” he let out a humorless laugh. “That broke me.”
And it broke something within you.
Katara never acted nor spoke as if she saw your marriage in such a way. She was the most honest person that you knew. Why would she say something like that?
“Aang,” you interrupted, unable to keep yourself from asking. “When was this?”
His eyes looked off to the side, the moonlight catching them in its cool light, bringing out a gleam similar to that of a moonstone.
“After our last fight.”
Ah. So that was it. The fight after he had returned from that mission at the border in the fire nation. Sure, the argument was bad but you never thought it was that bad.
“So you went to her.”
It wasn’t a question. It was just an observation.
Aang’s head shot up to look at you. He looked ready to get back on his feet and crowd you again, but held himself back. His breath hitched.
“Yes. I did, but only because she’s your closest friend here. I wanted to know if I was truly in the wrong and if so, how to fix it.”
The abrupt silence carried with the wind, allowing you the opportunity to think. It wasn’t worth getting upset over, especially when it was a thing of the past. Plus, Katara was close to everyone. She was Aang’s confidant before you. It made sense that they stayed close enough to still confide in one another so that wasn’t the issue. Well, if there was one to harbor on.
Katara was also nothing but supportive of you and Aang. She was there when you two met, when you started to gain feelings for each other, when you started courting and finally, at your marriage ceremony. It sounded like she had been trying to look out for you and your wellbeing. Though, it wasn't exactly necessary considering you were more than happy with Aang and all of his shenanigans.
Maybe a conversation with her was in order...
Be that as it may, you didn’t care about any of that. You only cared about you and him. That was it. Nothing else mattered.
Slowly, you made your way over to him. When you bent down, you grabbed one of his hands and pulled him back up. When he towered over you again with that softened yet hopeful look in his big grey eyes, you took the chance to pinch one of his big ears.
“Ow!” He instantly pouted, and held a hand to his injured ear. “What was that for?”
There it was. That expression on his face that always did make him look several years younger. He grumbled under his breath, trying to massage away the temporary pain while you let out a snort that easily turned into a laugh. He stopped, and looked at you.
Your laugh was like several bells to his ears. Or, ear. The other one was still throbbing so not much was going through that one but it made his heart jump all the same.
When you’d noticed the familiar light back in his eyes, you felt your own sting with tears again.
“I’m not a caged bird, Aang, and you’re not holding me back. At all. I’m here and with you in this marriage because I want to be. I saw a lifetime with you, and I still do. Yes, it hurts when you have to leave for long periods of time. It hurts when you don’t write for months and leave me waiting and thinking the worst. And yet, I’m still here.”
You raised a hand to his face, sliding a gentle thumb across the apple of his cheek, melting at the realization that you could survive this. That the only reason you’d fought with him was because you never allowed yourself to feel how you felt. It wasn’t going anywhere. You still wanted him to yourself but, at the same time, you were capable of sharing him with the world. You’d realized that there was room within you to do both and in a very healthy way.
He didn’t say anything. He let you continue.
A smile made its way to your lips.
“Maybe I can…travel with you? I know you’ve always said it’s too dangerous and that you don’t want to risk anything happening to me but you know I can fight. I can hold my own. I won’t get in the way. That way I can be right next to you and not a thousand miles away. I want adventure with you, Aang. I want to be with you and never be apart unless–”
For the first time in months, when his lips descended onto yours, you could feel yourself breathe. It was as if he’d given you life and built a new way to inhale, knowing that he was there and always would be. It was what your body had been craving. So, you let yourself finally let go of all the hurt and the pain that came with missing your husband and melted into his touch.
There was nothing more that needed to be said between you and him. Aang understood you completely now. You loved him and with that came the longing of wanting to be by his side more than be in a home that would never be able to replace him.
He could do that. He could take you with him wherever he went because no matter what, he would keep you safe. That had been his only fear and reason why he never wanted to take you with him. But, you were not some helpless damsel that constantly needed protecting. He’d forgotten how well you could take care of yourself too.
For a brief second, he pulled back and looked into your eyes, finding nothing but pure love and devotion staring back at him.
He hummed, and pressed his forehead to yours.
“You are the best thing that’s ever happened to me. I will never leave you alone again. You go where I go and if I have to leave you back here at home, I promise to write to you every single day. If I slip up, I give you full permission to yell and scream at me as much as you want, yeah?”
A giggle bubbled up as you shook your head, “you are going to be the death of me, you know that?”
Aang released a drawn out whine, and traveled his hands down your sides to your hips. He gripped your waist, giving you a look that said more than what he’d said next,
“In more ways than one.”
He reclaimed your lips, pushing his tongue past the softness of yours the moment you tried to say his name. It fell into a whisper and the wind took it, secretly manipulated by him bending the air around you, pulling you closer until it felt like you were molding into one. This is what he would spend his long nights dreaming of. Being able to hold you, to feel you, to kiss you. To hear your sighs, to feel your smile against his lips and to know that with you, he was whole again. To know that he was not alone, and could be no one but himself.
“Aang…not here,” you mumbled, feeling him spread kisses from the corner of your mouth to your cheek.
You felt a rumble in his chest, finding a faint smirk on his face.
“You sure? I think anyone would feel honoured to watch how the Avatar fucks his pretty little wife. Wouldn’t you agree?”
Your body shivered at the feeling of his fingers drawing your gown up from your thighs, moving around enough so that he'd grazed the lower end of your spine. His lips were on your neck now, suckling and kissing, knowing how easily you bruised. He’d leave as many as possible, just enough to make them hard to fully cover.
Perhaps he had a point. The thought of letting him take you here, on the balcony where anyone might come out on their own in the middle of the night and see the two of you, caused a bigger ache between your thighs than you wanted. Or maybe not having his hands on you for the past few months just made you too desperate to say no to any of his outlandish ideas.
Except, he knew that you knew that was not true.
When you felt him playfully bite at your shoulder, you squealed and pushed at his chest with widened eyes.
“Did you just…bite me?”
Aang said nothing at first. He merely grinned like some rebellious teenager, raising an eyebrow.
“What? Didn’t like it? Where’s all that fight from earlier, huh?”
He reached out and curled a finger around a strand of your hair. He licked his lips, observing the way your breath quickened. It would seem that you were just as needy and as desperate as him. And spirits, if that didn’t turn him on in the worst way.
His hand dropped to your collarbone, sliding his fingers down until they met the edge of your gown that dipped in the front. Slowly, he tugged until he could see more of your cleavage and almost groaned. You made him feel so depraved. Like a rabid, starving man eager to devour. Only you could make him this way. Turn and corrupt him into wanting you more than he’d ever wanted anything else in his life. Nothing could come close to being with you. Simply being near you, in your presence, made him want to be on his knees, serving you in every way imaginable.
You didn’t have to look. You could feel his knuckles skim the side of your breast, your body reacting almost instantly. His throat dried at the sight of your nipple peaking, almost like it was reaching out to him, begging him to touch.
“Aang…”
Your voice was like honey to his ears, so deliciously sinful. It nearly took the power of his past lives to get him to look at you without ripping your flimsy little gown off and taking you against the railing.
“Where?” he asked you, his voice low and broken, barely trusting himself to say much. Else, he feared he would growl at his weakening restraint. “You said not here, so where?”
Aang prayed to whoever was listening that you wouldn’t say the bedroom. He knew himself. He could feel it. The savage within him wouldn’t let him let you make it that far. It had to be somewhere close but comfortable for you because if it was left up to him, he would have you up against the nearest wall and fuck you that way. You wouldn’t have to lift a finger, just let him do all of the work.
His cock stirred.
Restraint.
Before he let his hand drop back down, you grabbed it and smiled.
“Come.”
And he almost did...until he realized that you’d meant for him to follow you instead.
Yeah, well. He could do that too.
Watching you turn and slowly pull him back inside, his eyes glued to the dip in your hips and the arch of your back, made him fully aware of just how much he could actually see through your gown. How it clung to you like a second skin, and moved with the gentle cadence of your steps. Especially when you passed through the warm glow of a few lit candles on the way in. Had those been lit before?
Truthfully, as much as he loved your body, it was how you'd reached for him as if you didn't need to think twice. As if it was your way of telling him that he had nothing left to fear. That you were silently choosing him all over again. It gave him the confirmation that he needed. That he hadn't failed you or this marriage.
That thought brought a certain warmth and haziness to his eyes. It was all he wanted. He hated fighting with you, but he’d misunderstood your feelings. You were only trying to convey that you'd missed him. He just didn't realize how much.
The moment you were about to cross the hearth, he grabbed you by the waist and captured your lips, groaning right into your opened mouth. He didn’t want to think about any of that right now. If anything, he used the long wait of seeing you as his pillar and reason.
He had to have you. There was no waiting to get to the bedroom. He'd waited long enough.
It felt like he was everywhere. The way his tongue brushed against yours, the feel of his hands digging into your waist and how you had to stand on your toes just to stay connected. Your hands moved over the strong ridges of his abdomen and up to his chest, sighing against his lips.
The love that you felt for him went beyond the limitations of the heart. Everything in you, even down to your spirit, knew that Aang was always going to be the one. The only one that could make you laugh, cry and love, all in the same breath.
He was simply and utterly perfection personified.
The kiss deepened, and you could feel it. You could feel the desperation, the longing that had taken place in your absence. How, not being near you, affected him just as much as you. He moved against you like wind brushing over water. Fluidly, purposefully, tracing his fingers up and down your spine to the base where they could spread over the round of your ass.
"Fuck,” he swore under his breath. His rough, raspy voice against your lips almost made you collapse.
He kissed from the corner of your lips to your jaw, down to your neck where he resumed leaving behind a few marks. He didn't want to hurt you but the thought of leaving darkened spots across your pretty skin spoke to him in a way that it shouldn't have. He imagined you failing to fully cover them and someone noticing. Would they be horrified? Concerned?
He smiled to himself.
He couldn’t wait.
Oh, and the noises, the sounds that you were making...
Truth be told, you were going to be the one to kill him in the end. And if this was to be his fate, then he gladly welcomed it with open arms.
"Aang, please," you pleaded, almost pushing him over the edge.
Still, he always did like how pretty you begged.
"Please what?" he asked you, still nipping and sucking at your neck, one of his hands moving to the front of your gown. His knuckles brushed just above the heat between your thighs, sending a chill through your body.
You gasped, and buried your face into his chest, hearing how steady his heartbeat was. He seemed calm, despite how he was making you feel. You just had no idea how close to breaking he actually was.
Months of being without him made your body miss him in ways you didn’t think were possible. It was sensitive to every touch and every breath, keening at the attention it craved for. It made you want to let go and completely fall apart in his arms.
“Touch me,” you breathed and as pathetic as it may have sounded, it didn’t stop you. “Need you touch me.”
“I am touching you, sweet girl,” he said into your skin, smiling softly, eyes closed. “What, you want more?” He felt you nod, and hummed to himself. “My greedy, greedy wife.”
When his lips found yours again, everything around you faded and blurred away into the background. It was easy to get lost in him, in all that he was. With you, in this moment, he was no longer the Avatar. He wasn’t the dependable friend nor was he the savior of Republic City; of the entire world. With you, he had no responsibilities. No one and nothing. He was just your husband, your Aang.
He didn’t rush. He took his time with you, reaching to cup your face and mold himself to you. He felt you quiver, whine and hold him like you would’ve fallen to pieces if not. He kissed you until you felt your head spin. Until he made you feel like you were somewhere else and not in a world where you had to share him. Until you felt your knees touch the soft rug in front of the hearth, and Aang hovering on top of you, his tattooed hands next to your head. Even the sound of the rain waned until there was nothing but the sound of his breath chasing after yours.
With you flat on your back now, Aang could really get a good look at you. Your cheeks were warm, and your lips were kiss-swollen. Part of your gown had slipped down, revealing your skin shimmering with a glow that made his heart squeeze. The mark on your neck was blooming steadily. You wore it beautifully, the gleam in your eyes telling him that you were proud of it even. His chest ached with so much love and warmth, he could hardly contain it.
“You are the most beautiful woman I have ever laid my eyes on.”
It was true. He’d met plenty of women, but none held a candle to you. They weren’t worthy comparisons in the slightest. Sure, they held their own unique beauty but you were above that. Everywhere you went, you had a luminescent light about you that made you look so angelic. You also loved with the entirety of your heart, giving away bits of you without caring about what was left. You loved and cared openly, without regard. That made you different, special.
He felt like the luckiest man in the entire fucking world.
As he looked you over, his eyes landed on the jewelry around your neck. He traced a finger along the necklace at your throat. He’d made it for you a while ago; smooth mountain bone carved with an Air Nomad wind swirl, reclaimed glider wood fitted beneath it and tiny bronze pieces. It was meant to mimic the prayer chimes you’d found in the air temple long ago.
Simple, invaluable and perfect, like you. It was also meant to remind you that he would always be with you, even if he couldn’t physically be there. He knew it was not to replace him. Only to keep you company when you felt at your lowest and missed him.
As he stared down at it, he pictured you holding it at random points of the day and crying into it at night. He wondered if you ever took it off even though you’d sworn to him that you never would.
You couldn’t help but catch the distant look in his eyes as he fiddled with the necklace.
“What are you thinking about?” You asked in a soft tone, a hand of yours coming up to brush over the corded bracelet you’d made for him that was wrapped around his wrist.
Pieces of both of you given to each other during the wedding ceremony so many moons ago. While his gift felt like it’d held much more meaning, yours was done through several long and frustrating days. You’d weaved and corded it yourself, despite Katara’s several attempts to help. As much as you could’ve used it, you wanted your gift to be handmade. It felt more special that way but there was nothing truly significant about it.
It was plain cord in a tightly woven fashion. At the time, it felt right because Aang was very simplistic and held no interest over materialistic things. As an air nomad, he was taught not to place value on wealth, extravagance and certain possessions. Thankfully, he didn’t reject your gift but looking at it in the same light that he was looking at his…
“Have you taken this off since I’ve been gone?”
Your eyes widened a bit. “No. Why?”
Aang swallowed, and licked his dry lips.
“Not even once? Not even when I failed to write or you thought that I was never coming back?”
The only reason you’d noticed that his eyes were back on you was because you were already staring at him.
You held eye contact and said, “No. Not even then. Not even when I cursed your name and cried some nights. I held onto it knowing that you would return because you always do.”
The level of faith and adoration that you had in him did something to him that he wouldn’t dare voice out loud. He knew this love for you would be his ruin. It was becoming unhealthy and maddening.
If you loved him, he loved you more. If you put him on some sort of pedestal, then you were the center of his universe and reason for existing. He’d went from believing that his purpose was to the people, to the world as their Avatar. That is, until he met you.
Since then, each breath that he took was for you.
Without you, he was nothing. A ghost walking the earth in service of others, but not living. No, not how he lives for you.
You are the deity in his eyes. The goddess that he prays to on nights that he can spend on his knees, worshipping you from between your thighs. You are his greatest gift, and the greatest weapon to his own destruction. And yet, he did this. He created this. He’d given you all of the power needed to end him because what was a greater tragedy than dying at the hands of someone he loved more than life itself?
“Aang…” your voice brought him back, feeling your hand against his cheek. Subconsciously, he leaned into your warmth and closed his eyes.
You’d always known what his love for you meant and where it came from. Despite the fact that it had happened over a decade ago, Aang was clearly not healed from the tragedy of losing his people. He’d spent years trying to accept it and move on, but you knew the worst of it. It showed through the restless nights full of nightmares, how protective he was of you and how he loved you.
It didn’t concern you the way it did Katara because you understood and accepted that it would always be a part of him. Granted, you didn’t want him to fall into darker places. Yet, instead, you did your best to gently guide him back. If not to remind him that you were not his only reason to live. You reminded him that he needed to come first before you, always.
“You love me so much, I know you do, but don’t let it blind you from what truly matters which is you. I ground you, yes, but you are the epitome of balance within yourself. When you fight, fight for you the way you fight for me. And when you love, love you the way you love me.”
Aang listened because you were right. It was so easy to fall into that place that he held special, just for you. If he let himself think too deeply about where this attachment to you started, he could almost feel the edges of his mind begin to close in on itself. Except, that was where you came in. You quieted the loud thoughts and the burning feeling in his chest that echoed all that he’d lost.
You kept him sane, but he needed to remember that he existed not just for you and the people but for himself too. That he could love you and love himself just as much, at the same time.
“I’ll be better, I promise.”
He turned his head, and placed a kiss to your palm. Another, then another until he held your hand in his, spreading kisses to your wrist before you found him hovering back over you. The way the fire from the hearth danced within the moonstones of his eyes, making them darker than they normally were, it made your stomach curl in want.
“Better,” you breathed and wet your lips, ignoring the way his gaze followed the tip of your tongue. “The way you say that, it’s almost as if—”
“It’s for me, but if I don’t live at least half of my life for you then I don’t know if I could at all.”
Aang parted your thighs with his knee, dropping his eyes down to your chest. He watched as it moved with each passing breath, feeling his mouth water at the sight.
“Earlier…” he started as he leaned down to mouth at your collarbone. “–you told me to touch you. Tell me where.”
He slotted his lengthy body right between your legs, holding himself up to not crush you under his weight but just enough to keep you from feeling how hard he’d been for the past several minutes. Not like he could hide it but the semi dark atmosphere was working a bit in his favor.
His lips moved to your sternum, and ghosted over a nipple. It reacted like he’d hoped it would, reaching out for him again.
Not hearing anything, he glanced up at you and purred against the softness of your breast.
“Can’t touch you if I don’t know where to start, pretty.”
“Aang,” you almost reprimanded, frowning down at him. He figured that you were meant to look a bit more menacing than you did, and it almost made him laugh. You were so cute.
He used the tip of his tongue to swipe up against your nipple. It was warm, warmer than normal and you knew exactly why. It caused you to gasp sharply and wail out his name again, but in a higher pitch. He chuckled.
“You’re not saying anything so I’m going to assume that you’re ready to turn it in for the nigh—”
“Oh, don’t you dare.”
The look you gave him now could’ve stoked the flames next to him. That is, if you were a fire bender. Still, you were a woman of many talents. Talents that he was eager to exploit.
“Then…?” he asked, moving down until his chest met the lower half of your stomach, chin placed perfectly between your breasts. His eyes glimmered with a sudden innocence, nothing like how they were before, and his lips were poked out into a pout.
Your eye almost twitched.
What a little performer.
“I’ve waited months for this, Aang. Just touch me. I don’t care how. Or I’ll just do it without you. Maybe I'll even have you watch this time.”
If nothing else, that got his attention.
Aang’s face paled and fell into a hard line. Before you could protest, your gown was torn into jagged lines, right down the front. It laid in tatters around you, torn apart and utterly unsalvageable. He didn’t meet your widened eyes or the shocked look on your face at all.
Instead, he cupped his hand around one of your breast and closed his mouth over the eager nipple. You let out a long moan, letting your head fall back against the rug underneath you. As if everything about him wasn’t big enough, his tongue covered all that it needed to, not missing a spot.
His throaty sounds of approval made your head spin, yet again, feeling your legs twitch with the urge to close. Except, he was positioned perfectly in between them, keeping them wide open.
When he’d switched to the second bud and used his fingers to tweak and pull at the other, you could’ve cried. Your body didn’t know how to react. It’d been so long, way too long since it felt the touch of another that wasn’t yours. It knew him. It knew his touch like a familiar feeling embedded inside, coded by his hand. Pitifully sensitive and so reactive.
And Aang loved it.
Making you feel good felt like it was a part of his dna. He couldn’t imagine doing anything else.
Once he’d heard the mutterings of you telling him that you wanted more, he moved further south until he was met with your bare cunt.
He placed a palm just above it and used his thumb to raise as much of you as he could, staring directly at your clit now. It looked terribly swollen and shiny with your own arousal. He felt himself twitch in his pants.
Spirits, if you weren’t going to send him straight to the spirit world early.
He heard you mewl and saw your hips move up, using your body to beg for more this time. He smirked to himself before looking up at you. Like he figured, you refused to look back. Instead, you covered your face with your hands, mumbling about how he should stop staring and get on with it.
“Tell me, have you touched yourself since I’ve been gone?”
When you peeked back down at him, his eyes were back at your clit, massaging around it. He was still refusing to fully touch you, and it started to annoy you.
“Why does that matter? You’re here now. You can touch me—”
“Yeah, but…” Aang stopped what he was doing completely, and maneuvered his arms under your thighs to place your legs on his shoulders. Then, he kissed at the insides of your thighs, smiling into your skin. “Humor me. I wanna know.”
Looking down and watching him give attention to all but where you needed it most made you inwardly sigh. Humor him, he’d said. Fine.
“I did.”
He glanced up at you, clearly amused.
“When.”
“…that night. The same day that you left for the mission.”
A pause. A very long pause, in fact.
“Spirits,” he groaned out your name into your skin, grounding himself with a deep breath. “You’re going to kill me.”
Your clit throbbed.
“Why?”
He took a few seconds to respond, and it was not what you were expecting him to say.
“Because I did too.”
He could practically feel your eyes burning a hole through him, silently wanting him to further explain.
He trailed his lips down your inner thigh until you felt his warm breath just above your weeping cunt.
“After traveling for hours, I stopped at a point and made camp. Leaving you was hard,” he closed his eyes for a moment, reliving the memory. “It’s always the hardest thing I do so, of course, I started to miss you. I didn’t want to trust my dreams to give me what I wanted so I took it instead.”
The way he said that made your legs twitch, and your throat dry.
“When Appa and Momo finally fell asleep, I took a walk. Just to clear my head, you know? Walks usually help me sleep better. Though…” he sighed. “I couldn’t stop thinking about you. Thoughts of missing you turned into missing your voice, what you were doing, what you were wearing…or not wearing.”
Your breath quickened, knowing exactly where this was going. The mental image that your mind began to paint nearly lit your body on fire.
“I stopped at a tree and just…” he opened his eyes, and saw how hazy yours was. The greys of his darkened considerably. “Well. I’m sure you can imagine what happened next.”
The thought of him getting desperate enough to just…do that in the middle of wherever he was while thinking about you around the same time that you were touching yourself thinking about him…
You couldn’t bare another moment of talking about the past. He was here, seconds away from eating you out. You refused to use that time talking about what was when it could be what is.
“Aang, please stop talking. Touch me or I’m actually going to lose my mind.”
He stopped giving you thigh kisses, his eyes finding yours again, letting his lips curve up into another smirk.
“Yes ma’am,” and focused all of his attention exactly where you needed him the moment he’d laid you down and got into position.
As soon as he covered your clit with his mouth, your back arched and you let out a moan that made him groan right against you. He’d thought about this more times than he could count. Shameless thoughts of him pleasuring you, just like this, and pulling the prettiest sounds from you. Night after night, he laid awake, watching it play over and over. As the days turned into weeks, it only got worse. You made it hard to focus on anything else.
Much like now.
Your fingers plunged into the rug, holding it like it was anchoring you. It was overstimulating. The feel of a hot, slick pressure between your thighs, pressing along your clit, lazily dipping between your sticky folds, parting them for better access. Euphoria, pure bliss rushed through you, coaxing a broken moan that barely made it past your lips when you felt his tongue snake along the slit of your cunt.
"Ah, Aang!"
And the sounds, the slurping and the groaning... He was definitely doing it on purpose. What a little shit.
His name falling from your lips made him grin to himself as he suctioned his lips back around your throbbing clit. He knew that you could come from just this, but he wanted to take it a step further.
Aang let one of your thighs rest completely on his shoulder and traveled his fingers down to your slippery, twitching hole. He teased them up and down, hearing you beg and plead, before pushing a digit inside. His middle finger curled, earning a gasp from you. He hummed into the mess of you, instinctively aware of how to navigate through the warm tightness of your cunt. He'd done this several times, but it always felt like the first. Always felt like a starved-man, unable to get enough of you.
And fuck, if you didn’t taste like the sweetest thing he’s ever had the pleasure of eating.
You wailed and cried out for him, wanting more but not sure what more you could want when it felt like he was giving you too much.
He lapped at you with his tongue and sucked, alternating, as he added another finger. Except, this time he made sure both were warm where you would feel it, just like you'd felt the unnatural heat of his tongue moments ago.
Your body was well on the edge, feeling his pace quicken. He didn't stop, not even when you started to beg all pretty. Once he found that spongey spot inside of you, he aimed for it with each thrust of his fingers and fed on your swollen clit until he could hear your breath hitch and your moans get higher in pitch.
He nodded against you, groaning, "Like that, baby. Doin' so good for me."
"Aang!" you cried out again. "I can't!" he continued as he guided you through it.
"You can, love. You're so close," He said in a husky tone, brows furrowed, and still nose deep in you. "Let me feel it. Let me hear it. Please."
And that was all that it took.
He heard your breath stutter, and felt your walls tighten and flutter around his fingers before the squelching sounds turned into a steady drip of arousal. You'd practically coated his entire hand in it, leaving behind a wet, creamy mess. Your hips jerked, thighs quivering, nearly trapping his head there until you inhaled and exhaled.
For a moment, you didn't move and neither did he. As he cleaned you up with his tongue, you twitched but didn't say a word. You just stared up at the ceiling, your skin clad with sweat and warm with heat from the hearth. The thought of doing this and more here in front of the crackling flame no longer felt like a good idea. It felt like your body was on fire as it came down from its high. There was no way you were going to be able to focus if you didn't move elsewhere.
"Aang..." You called out for him, trying to use your fingers to get his attention. They brushed over his cheekbone then to his jaw. When you looked down, he was just coming up. A smile broke out across your face, your own cheeks warming and not from the heat of the fire. "You are so messy."
He chuckled, and rose to half of his height, settling himself properly between your legs again. He smoothed his hands down your thighs and held your gaze.
"So are you."
And well, he wasn’t wrong. You could feel a warm breeze glide between you and him, making you groan and rest your head back on the rug. From the stickiness, the heat and the way Aang continued to stroke and grip at your legs only made you want more. You’d already admitted to him how selfish you were. Why not raise the bar a bit more?
“Let’s move to the bed. I’m hot and this rug isn’t as comfortable as I was hoping it would be,” you mumbled, letting him tug you up until you were nearly face to face. He was so tall, even on his knees he was still looking down at you. Infuriating, but a turn on nonetheless.
Aang stood up first, and reached out for you to take his hands. You did but you looked down and back up at him.
“Carry me?”
He smiled, and tilted his head.
“Why? Can’t stand on your own?”
Normally, he would’ve just done what you asked but he couldn’t help but tease you. You made it too easy.
Your face fell into a scowl, playfully rolling your eyes.
“Fine. I’ll walk then.”
He hummed. “Poor thing. C’mere.” He bent down and like he would with a child, picked you up from under your arms and held you against him, feeling your arms secure themselves around his neck. Once he’d made sure your legs were also secured around his waist, he kissed your cheek and started walking towards the bedroom. “Such a baby.”
You half-smiled to yourself, looking elsewhere.
“Yeah, your baby.”
“Mhm.”
With Aang’s long legs, it didn’t take him but a few long strides to reach the room. Instead of putting you down, he turned and sat on the edge of the bed, still keeping your legs locked around his waist. Straddling him now, he dropped his arms from your hips and leaned back on his hands, eyeing you down. The intensity in his eyes made your arms loosen but not drop completely. Just lax, staring at him back.
“What?”
He didn’t say anything at first, just continued to look at you. Now that he’d had you fully naked and could see every part of you clearly, there was nothing keeping him from ogling you. Beautiful from head to toe. He just didn’t deserve you. He truly didn’t. And yet, you were made for him. You fit perfectly, in every way of the word.
He was just so happy that you’d chosen him to spend the rest of your life with. It wasn’t because he was the Avatar. No, you’d fallen in love with him as Aang, and that made his heart melt. Even to this day. He just couldn’t imagine what his life would’ve been like without you in it.
Just so completely over the moon in love with you.
You brought him back by trailing your fingers across his face, lightly pinching at his cheek.
“You spend way too much time in here,” you tapped at his temple, making him smile again. “What are you thinking about? Hopefully me.”
Cheeky, he thought before he inhaled and suddenly wrapped his arms around your waist, leaning up. His nose brushed yours, earning a giggle from you. But not wrong.
“Yes, you, beautiful girl.” He glanced at your lips, pecking them once then twice. He thumbed at your spine, “always you.”
You fought back a smile, biting at your lip.
“I’ve missed you. A lot.”
“And I’ve missed you so much more.”
The moment felt so perfect, it made you wonder if you were dreaming again. You couldn't help but remember what it had been like for you with him gone. Mentally, it was torture. So, to think that this too was nothing but a dream... Was it really that far-fetched?
But maybe it was the way Aang breathed, the feel of his chest against yours and that familiar glimmer in his eyes that promised you this was no dream. That he was truly here, right in front of you. Kissing you, touching you, and the whisperings of how much he'd missed you. It wasn't in your head. Not his voice, not his scent. Not even the way he filled up the space with his radiance, as faded from exhaustion as it was. It was still him. Your Aang.
"Now you're doing the thinking," you heard him say, feeling him press his forehead against yours.
Your lips split into a small grin, briefly closing your eyes.
"Sorry. Remind me to never think about you again."
Aang snorted. "Hah hah."
You snorted also and broke out into a chuckle, your eyes deep into his. "Seriously though. I know you're tired, but I really wanna...you know..."
"Mm," he took in a breath, ghosting his lips over yours and sliding his hands up and down your sides. "I may be the master of all four elements but I don't think I have the ability to read minds. Especially yours."
You stared at him back, and made a face. He grinned, and kissed you. You didn't hesitate to reciprocate it. A hand of yours nearly made its way to the nape of his neck to pull him closer when you broke apart, still giving him a look.
"Don't distract me."
"Awh, and it almost worked."
"What do you mean especially mine? Are you saying that you wouldn’t be able to read mine? Saying I have a big head or something?"
Aang deeply chuckled at that as he moved his lips to your forehead, laying a gentle kiss there, "No, but since we're on the subject–”
"Goodnight."
"Nooo, I'm joking," he whined, tightening his hold on you the moment that he felt you trying to pull away. You rolled your eyes, trying to keep back a smile. "Stayy."
“Why? So you can bully me some more?”
A bit distracted now, Aang kissed at the corner of your mouth before running the tip of his tongue along the seam of lips, not asking but taking. You let him nudge his tongue in and move against yours. He wasn’t even kissing you and you were already aching and wet again.
You let out a weak moan that was practically a whine, trying to lean in for more. When he’d slapped an ass cheek, you gasped and pulled back in shock.
Aang smirked, “don’t give me that look. You’re being bratty now. It’s not very nice so why should I be?”
Your lips formed a pout.
“Well…I’m sorry. Is that what you wanted to hear?”
He shrugged. “Good.”
“Enough?”
“No.”
“Ugh,” you pulled away from his lap and stood, sighing to yourself.
He leaned back on his hands and watched you again. The burning feel of his eyes on you made your body react as if he’d still had his hands on you. It was maddening. He was maddening.
“Baby,” he called for you in that sweet tone of his that he knew always worked on you. “Come back. You were saying something earlier. Was it about continuing what we were doing in the other room?”
You started to pull on another gown as you answered him over your shoulder.
“Earlier? That was like 30 seconds ago, grandpa.”
Aang groaned, “So mean to me,” and fell the rest of the way, now flat on the bed and staring up at the ceiling.
He didn’t say anything at first so you continued to dress, silently wishing the heat from the hearth could reach all the way to the bedroom. Then again, the upper floor of your home had more space than the others. Which meant it took longer for it to get cool and warm at times.
Once your new gown was lazily tied at the hip, you turned and just…stared. Aang’s eyes were closed. You knew that he wasn’t sleeping just yet, but the lax of his face… It made him look like he was. From the dark fullness of his brows, to the slope of his nose and finally to the soft of his lips that were parted. His chest sunk and rose steadily, his body still as if he was at peace in the silence.
As your eyes drifted lower, you couldn’t help but notice how well defined he was. Years and years of evasive combat training, honing his endurance in stamina and breath control as well as conditioning his mobility to perfect aerial techniques. It came from immense focus and strength that was learned, not necessarily taught.
Aang understood that better than anyone. Despite the fact that he was the Avatar, he learned early on that life was never meant to be handed to him. So he earned it, and perfected himself by doing it all on his own. Once he’d become comfortable with using all four elements, he trained in three until they became as familiar as air bending.
Toned, disciplined and strengthened by all of his hard work truly did pay off, just not in the way he had intended it to.
Honestly, it was completely unfair.
The quiet rise and fall of his chest drew your attention lower, expanding and tracing over defined muscle that was softened only slightly by exhaustion. Even after months of being away, his body still carried that same dangerous balance of gentleness and strength that always managed to unravel you far too easily.
There was not a single part of him built for stillness; not truly. Even laid across the bed in silence, he looked capable of movement at any given moment, like the wind itself rested beneath his skin.
And it did because spirits.
Maybe it was the lanternlight. Maybe it was the relief of having him home and alive where you could finally touch him again, but looking at him now made warmth pool low in your stomach in a way that almost annoyed you.
Because this was Aang.
Your Aang.
The same man that had frustrated you to tears only an hour ago now had you standing there in nothing but a thin gown while your thoughts betrayed you in the most depraved of ways.
You looked at him with a hunger that felt insatiable. Like the moment on the rug moments ago had only lit the fire within you, not put it out.
Slowly and quietly, you crept back up to the bed. You were trying to be stealthy, much like a shirshu. They were patient hunters, and earned their prey by tracking silently while being unsettlingly precise. However, the moment your knee dipped into the mattress, hands found your waist and within half of a breath, you were on your back with a real predator hovering over you.
Did he just airbend—?
Aang’s eyes roamed over your fluttering chest, moving them up to your lips and finally to the surprised gleam in your eyes.
A giggle bubbled from your throat, “You could’ve let me think I had that one.”
“Sorry pretty,” he leaned down and skimmed his nose along the column of your neck. “Maybe next time.”
Giving you a single kiss right at the center, Aang pulled back and was on his feet now. He peered down at you, noticing the new gown that you were wearing. He frowned before pouting, but he didn’t comment. Instead, his tattooed hands glided down your calves until his fingers closed around your ankles. Both of you shared a knowing look before he pulled you right up against his pelvis, helping you lock your legs at his waist.
“Aang—”
“Do you still want more?”
His question caught you off guard, but went right to your aching cunt nonetheless. His arousal felt hard and prominent against you, throbbing with the promise of ruining you. You didn’t dare look down. You knew what you would see. You could feel it.
“Yes.”
His deft fingers languidly pulled at the strings that kept your gown closed, and watched it fall apart to reveal your body to him once again. He caught the groan before it left his throat, opting to clench his jaw instead. The want to be inside of you ruled over his body’s need to sleep away the exhaustion of his long journey back home, back to you. He’d tasted you. Now, he wanted to feel you.
“So beautiful….” He bent down and twisted a bit to the side to spread kisses along your navel and up to valley of your breasts. “So mine…”
Aang reached a hand up to gently twist and tug at a nipple, earning a blissful sigh from you that sounded heavenly through the fog of his mind. He didn’t stop to let you breathe. He shifted his hips so that he could grind his erection directly against the bareness of your cunt, fully aware that it would sully the pants he had on. All for the better, really. The more transparent the fabric became, the closer he felt to you. He could bet all of the moon peaches in the world that you were just as warm and as wet as his mind conjured during the nights he’d spent alone.
He’d felt it earlier when he had his fingers inside you but he was smart enough to know that there was a difference between using his fingers and using something far more sensitive and connecting.
“Ahh, Aang,” you whined near his ear as his lips traveled back up to your neck.
He felt the tip of his arousal snag at your clit, causing him to push his face into your skin, hissing and gripping at your breast. He knew he could end the torturing of all this but there was just something so pathetic and primal about rutting against you like this. Perhaps it was also a result of his hazy mind and exhaustion creeping back in. Or maybe it had something to do with how you sounded whenever his length passed through the soaked folds of your pretty cunt.
Yeah. It was probably that, actually.
Though, as much as he enjoyed the thought of turning your brain into mush from a mere grinding session, he wanted something far more rewarding.
“Hold on,” he told you before pulling himself back. Quicker than he was trying to, he’d shucked off his pants and kicked them somewhere in the dark to be dealt with later.
During the brief intermission, you’d decided to move further up in bed, closer to the wooden headboard. The bed was big enough to comfortably fit several people in it so it was a bit funny when you thought back to the reason it was made this size.
Aang hadn’t always been so tall so his growth spurt shocked everyone. Somewhere along the way, a twin sized bed no longer seemed appropriate. He would always complain about his aching back or the way his legs would practically hang off of the ends. By that point, it was time to upsize.
You didn’t remove your gown completely. You just pulled it up your thighs to rest openly at your waist so that when Aang finally resettled in the valley of them, there was finally nothing that stood between you and him.
Except, when he did join you in bed, he’d noticed that you were a bit too far up and as he rested further down, he tilted his head. You recognized the look in his eyes, and felt your stomach jolt.
“Aang—ah!”
He bended the wind between his palms and your ankles, letting the current pull you down exactly where he needed you. His smirk met your flushed pout.
“Perfect.”
You rolled your eyes, wanting to look away. “Show off.”
The heavy weight of his cock settled painfully present against your cunt, oozing strings of precum that made you hyper aware of how badly he wanted you. Well, that wasn’t the only sign. From his chest up to his face, his skin was flushed. Even through the dark cover of the room, you could see the neediness in his eyes. A swirling grey that quietly confessed how much he’d truly longed for this moment. By the looks of him, you couldn’t even imagine how he was able to survive all of that time away from you.
“Better?” You asked him, feeling him twitch against you.
He simply nodded, lips parted, before wrapping a hand around himself. His eyes dropped down to look at how wet you were while you watched him. Slow, leisure strokes that made the muscles in his arm flex and the veins atop his hand push against his skin. Your mouth salivated, noticing the crease in his brows as he used his other hand to spread your folds apart. Sticky and shiny, and so fucking pretty.
He groaned and tightened his hand at the base of his length, letting out a slow deep breath. When he peeked back up at you, his heart almost stopped.
The way you were still watching him, a hand at your breast gripping and pulling at the sensitive bud with your bottom lip stuck between your teeth—
He must’ve died long before he came back home. This was it, his own little oasis in the spirit world.
Nothing in the entire world could compare to this moment.
And he meant nothing.
“Aang…”
He felt you before he heard you, the softness of your hand brushing his cheek. When his vision reorientated back on you, he saw the gentle smile on your face.
“I’m right here,” you said to him in the same soft way you touched him, grounding him again. “I’m real and here.”
Aang felt you pull at his wrist, tugging him down until the tip of his nose pressed against yours. His hands found themselves caging you, being careful to hold most of his weight. You tilted your head and ghosted your lips over his.
“My perfect husband,” you whispered, his back rippling with shivers that he tried to hide but couldn't. As your hands moved over his shoulders and along his back, you’d felt it. “So good to me…so perfect for me…”
When the tips of your fingers trickled down the line of his spine, he let out a whine that made you clench around nothing. It didn't sound like anything you'd heard from him before and maybe that was due to the time that the two of you had to spend apart. Two months had been the longest, and definitely the hardest. You'd felt the strain of it on your end but realizing what it must have been like for Aang, a man that loved beyond the limitations of the air nomadic ways; it was surely just as painful as a loss.
You'd cried many nights for the spirits to bring your husband back home safe and had the support of Katara during it all, but Aang had dealt with the torment alone.
There was still that lingering tension underneath his skin that he'd made sure to hide well from you but you could feel it; could feel him unraveling. You could tell that he was no longer able to keep it buried inside and away from you.
"Please," he begged you, leaving a trail of kisses from your collarbone to your ear. "Need to be inside you. Please."
And who were you to deny him when you needed him just as badly?
"I think you've kept me waiting long enough," you told him as you reached down the small space between your bodies. Once your fingers wrapped around him, his breath trembled as if he was going to fall to pieces before making it the rest of the way.
He gripped at the pillows underneath you, grinding his teeth together. He was fighting to hold it together. He'd wanted this moment to last, but could feel himself unthreading.
The moment you lined the head of his cock up to your twitching cunt, your hands moved to the curve of his ass and started to push him into you. He gasped into your neck, and groaned when the tip of his cock popped past the first ring of muscle. He shook his head in pure disbelief. You'd felt better than he'd remembered. It almost made him delirious.
Aang swore under his breath, feeling you push him in further. Clenching onto him the minute he split you apart, it almost sent him over the edge.
"If you knew what you felt like being wrapped around me like this," he breathed near your ear, "you'd lose your mind too."
"I know baby, I know," you kissed his cheek and jaw, feeling him fill you up until the fullness of him was all that you could feel. “And you’re doing such a good job…”
There was no escaping him now. No where for you to run or hide. He had you fully pressed into the mattress, arms blocking you in and his cock sunk so deep, it made you move your hands back up to the broadness of his back to help anchor you.
"Mmm, aang, you feel so good inside me," you wrapped your legs around his waist, moaning at how snug he felt. It felt so right, so perfect, you almost didn't want him to move but knew that if he didn't, he wasn't going to last long at all.
Once every inch of him was inside, he took in a breath while you exhaled. You allowed him the time he needed to ground himself before watching him lean up. Your eyes had gotten used to the dark and could see the concentrated look on his face as he moved his hands to your hips. His eyes dropped down to where the both of you were connected, and finally breathed out.
Everything about you drove him insane. Even when you’d finally given yourself to him, every single part of you, he still couldn’t get enough. He needed more of you. He wanted to push his body into yours until he was able to combine your souls into one. Claim your entire essence and being as his, marked forever as the one that saved him from himself.
You were his beaming light amongst the black ocean of his heart.
Where he was once drowning under the weight of all of his responsibilities, you saw him and pulled him out of it. How else could he thank you? Being your perfect-imperfect husband didn’t seem like enough. He wished to pull the stars down from the night sky and hand them all to you because you deserve something no one on earth could give you. Something only he was capable of giving you.
What was that? What was the very thing he could give? Something he hadn’t already given you?
It had to be none other than a promise, a proper promise that he would have to keep for as long as he lived.
He just didn’t realize that he’d known it all along. Known it since he’d made his vow to you the day of the wedding.
You could tell that something was on his mind but you didn’t pressure to ask. Instead, you waited.
Then, his eyes finally found yours again and held your gaze as he said,
“I want to make you a promise. A real one.”
You blinked, and slowly nodded.
“Yeah, okay. What promise?”
Aang’s brows furrowed as he mulled over what he wanted to say, and how he wanted to say it.
It took what felt like minutes before he said anything else, and it was not like anything you had expected him to say.
“I may not be able to promise that the world won’t need me again because it will. It always does, but I can promise that you’ll never have to wait in silence like that again.”
His thumbs rubbed across the skin of your waist, his eyes hard set on yours.
“And no matter where I go, I’ll always find my way back to you.”
Aang knew that he didn’t need to make you that promise, especially considering the conversation from earlier where there was finally a mutual understanding of how both of you felt. Even so, he could recognize how much he has truly hurt you. It wasn’t this one instance but for all of the others in the past. He wanted to make up for it all in a single promise that he vowed to never break.
You were rendered speechless. His wedding vows had been a bit different, vowing that he would always be by your side and would always put you first before any and everything, but not like this.
At the time, Aang did not foresee his duties as the Avatar and founder of Republic City getting in the way of his marriage, but he saw it now and only wanted to reassure you that you would be his true priority; that it was possible to love you and hold the world on his shoulders by doing it together.
He could see it, the tears that started to well up in your eyes and quickly shushed you, leaning down to press his lips against your forehead while holding your face. Your eyes fluttered closed, as his lips moved over each of your eyelids and to your nose.
“Don’t cry, not for this,” he whispered, kissing your cheeks now. “Because this promise to you cannot and will not be broken. Even when I’m long gone, I'll keep it. I promise…”
Your heart sunk hearing him talk like that. Just the thought of it…
“Please, Aang, don’t say that…” You sniffled, holding him back into your arms. This time, with no intention of letting him go. “You’re not allowed to go anywhere, do you hear me? Nowhere but here with me.”
“I know,” he breathed against your lips, staring back at you while using a thumb to wipe at the falling tears. “I just love you so much.”
You could see it in his eyes, the love and the utter devotion that he held for you that was unlike anything you had ever felt from someone. He looked at you like you were all that he could see.
And that was all that you could ever ask for.
“I love you so much more,” your lips pressed against his lips gently, sighing into it, feeling him return it eagerly.
He instinctively began to move his hips, rolling into you without rush but with purpose. The slow drag of his thick cock made you whimper into his opened mouth, your fingers dipping into his back.
He grunted, trailing his lips to your cheek, breathing heavily as he fucked into you deeper. Every inch, every part of you felt like pure bliss, a maze that he wanted to willingly get lost in. He didn’t care about anything else but this, you, being inside you and hearing your pretty moans. The way his name rolled off of your tongue, gasping and holding onto him like you were close to falling apart.
You were going to ruin him.
He bit down into his lip, frowning, as he reached up to hold the headboard above you. Something, anything that could keep him from losing his mind early on because he was close, dangerously close.
He kept his hand locked onto the wooden board, bracing his hulking frame as he began drilling into you with a rhythmic, punishing vigor. Every thrust was deep, deliberate and fueled by the weeks of loneliness and longing he had carried in his soul. He wasn't just fucking you. He was trying to merge with you, to bridge the gap that the distance had created between your bodies.
Aang groaned when he felt your cunt tighten around him and your hips move to match his pace.
“Fuck,” he moaned as his cock drove into you harder and faster, chasing more of you.
You choked out a sob, crying into his shoulder, your body jostling with every deliberate pound into your poor cunt he made.
“O-h, Aang! You’re so good, feel so fucking good inside of me!”
More of your begging, your nails sinking into his back, your cries and the feeling of you sucking him in with each thrust.
Call him a greedy bastard, but he wanted it all.
His movements were reckless, the bed creaking violently against the floor with every heavy impact of his hips against yours. His breath came in ragged, uneven hitches and his sweat slicked skin slid against yours, creating a feverish heat.
“Aang!” You sobbed hearing the sloppy squelch of your cunt with each unforgiving snap of his hips, feeling him directly hit that spongey spot inside of you like he was drawn to it.
He bent and kissed down until his lips found one of your perked nipples, sucking and rolling his tongue around the hard bud until he felt you shake and spill out the most prettiest moans he’d ever heard from you.
Aang was losing himself in you, and didn’t notice when his tattoos began to glow a bright blue hue. For you, it was all that you could see.
With his head lowered, you could see the arrow along his skin flickering until it was stable and illuminating, growing brighter with each ragged breath and slam of his hips against yours. His eyes were closed but you knew that those beautiful greys of his had been taken over by the same blue light.
He was terrifying to most in his avatar state but to you, he’d never looked more beautiful.
The headboard creaked under the sheer weight of his hold as he fucked you, the poor wood wailing and threatening to break under the pressure. He let out a broken groan around your skin before raising his head, his voice sounding a bit off. It sounded overlapped with more than one voice but it was still him. Desperate and filled with an overwhelming need to come as deep inside of you as humanely possible.
Your hands moved from his back to his face, holding him with care to get his attention. When he finally opened his eyes again, all you could see was an endless pool of blue. His brows were furrowed, and his forehead was beaded with sweat.
“Are you close?” All he was able to do was nod, nearly collapsing into your hands, his hips stuttering to signal that he was getting incredibly close. “Good, because I’m going to need you to cum and not pull out. Can you do that for me?”
Even through the haze of pleasure, Aang still made an expression of confusion.
“Don’t...pull out. So you want me to…?”
He left it there, knowing that you understood what he didn’t say.
You smiled, and nodded.
“Yes. Can you?”
Aang didn’t quite understand. Every time that the two of you had sex, you always made it clear he had to pull out. Pouting, he agreed but was never shy about telling you that he didn’t like it. If a baby happened, then wasn’t it meant to be? There was no better way to prevent a pregnancy, other than a certain type of tea, so pulling out was next best. Either way, Aang was not a fan but respected your boundaries nevertheless. Now, you were wanting him to…
"Wanna give you a little airbender, Aang. Would you like that?" You breathlessly asked him, feeling his hips falter at the sound of that. You smiled, stroking a thumb across his warm face. "Would be such a good mommy. Could give you everything you could ever want. Let me do it for you, Aang, please."
And that fucking did it.
Your voice, the feeling of your heated walls clamping down onto him, and you giving him permission to fill you up knowing what might happen; all of it sent him right over the edge.
He groaned out, applying more pressure to the headboard than he had intended and felt it split down the middle. The bed collapsed underneath you, surprising you but you weren't given time to assess what happened when Aang leaned down to bury his face into your neck. You felt his cock twitch and pulsate before filling you up until the mix of his thick cum and your arousal oozed out between you. His hands clutched into fists around the sheets as he tried to control his breathing.
You thought that he was done but his hips hadn't stopped. They just slowed to a steady roll, deep and intentional.
"Aang..." You whined under your breath, your arms wrapped loosely around his neck. Your body was nearly exhausted, but you weren't there yet. Could that be his reason?
He didn't say anything. He just kept moving inside of you, kissing at your neck. He shivered, feeling the way your cunt fluttered around him as your calves slid back into place, ankles firmly locked. He hummed, one of his hands sliding down your side until they reached your thighs to grip at them.
“Want you to cum around me,” he muttered low into the warmth of your neck, lazily smiling. “Can you do that for me?”
When he looked at you, you’d noticed that his greys were back and the arrows along his forehead and his back had dimmed back to their normal blue. It made your face warm.
“Yes.”
“Good girl,” he praised, and used his arm to hold himself up while his other hand continued its trek down to your neglected clit. “And don’t think I forgot about her.”
As soon as his middle finger started to draw lazy circles before gradually moving a bit faster while letting his hips roll into you at the same pace, you squealed. You hand instantly reached down to hold onto his wrist as he abused the sensitive little nub, crying out.
“Ah, please!”
Aang was embarrassed to admit but aiming for your pleasure instead of his and watching your face twist up knowing that he was the reason, it made him ten times harder. There was nothing better than servicing you and making you feel good. It was just the simple fact that he had already came.
But who said he couldn’t do it again?
No matter how many times he did this with you, it would always feel like the first. There was just something about being with you in such an intimate way and connecting beyond a conversation or doing anything else together. He was very spiritual and believed that sex was a very sacred act. It was something he would never do with anyone else. Doing this with you, with his wife, felt like the highest form of his love for you.
When he felt your nails dig into the skin of his wrist and your cunt tighten around his cock again, he let out a ragged breath that was mixed with a laugh.
“You’re so tight, it feels like you’re going to cut off the circulation down there.”
You whined out his name, breathless, trying not to laugh at his untimely joke.
“Stop.”
“I’m being serious,” he said, letting another chuckle before groaning out and looking down at you. “Gonna cum, my love?”
You nodded with teary eyes, moving your hand up to his bicep, feeling it flex under your fingers.
“Mhm.”
“Yeah?”
“Aang—”
“Let me feel it.”
He leaned down and pressed his forehead against yours, eyebrows knitted together, fighting to concentrate.
“Please, let me feel it…”
You moaned out his name again and again, your head spinning, being unable to feel anything but his cock fucking into you and his fingers moving against your clit like it was his last day on earth. His whisperings of telling you how pretty you sounded and how much he loved you was all too much. You couldn’t handle it.
With one more sharp inhale and slam into your hips, your back arched and felt a wave of ecstasy crash into you, leaving you trembling and mumbling a string of nonsense that made Aang follow right behind you. You were too warm, too tight, his release spilled into you again, plugged and just as filled as the first.
Both of you stayed just like that, foreheads together and panting into each other as the comfortable silence of the night finally took over.
After a few moments of him trying to catch his breath, he smiled softly and kissed your nose.
“Let’s get you cleaned up, hm?”
You were relieved when he moved off of the bed and walked towards the washroom because your entire body refused to move even an inch. In fact, you were very close to falling asleep if not for the warm, damp feeling of a cloth against your inner thighs and over your mound. He knew your legs were going to instinctively twitch closed so he used his hands to keep them pried apart until he finally finished up.
After properly discarding the small towel, he scooped you into his arms so that he could work on the bed.
At first, it took him a moment. Now that he was able to actually see the bed from a different angle, the headboard lowered the bed quite unevenly. The damage wasn’t bad at all, it would just take a few minutes to brainstorm how to fix it. It was definitely going to be a temporary fix, but he knew it would hold long enough for a good night’s sleep.
Still, the idea of him as the avatar, master of all four elements, being humbled by a broken headboard after wrecking it with his wife—it definitely felt like a very comical irony.
But, someone had to do it so, he got to work.
Aang knew that the only way to go about this was to use air to reposition the splintered pieces back into place, or as close as he could, and then smooth some of the rough cracks. Luckily, it wasn’t completely split down the middle so it was fixable. He just knew that come morning, he would need to fully replace the bed.
Once that was done, he moved onto what was next.
As he held you with one arm and replaced the bedding with his other, you couldn’t help but stare up at him. You knew that he knew you were looking at him, judging by the small grin on his face, but he didn’t say anything and neither did you. You just watched him impressively use one arm to do things that would normally take two to do.
Once the bed was replaced with clean linen and warm blankets, Aang gently placed you back down, joining you now. He shifted onto his back and pulled you into him by your waist. You hummed, curving a leg up and over his thighs, your hand across his chest.
The silence continued and just when you were about to fall asleep, you heard the softness of his voice.
“Three days from now, I’ll be leaving again.”
Because it was engrained in your body, your first reaction was your stomach dropping. Still, you calmed your breathing and chose not to say anything. You remembered what he’d said to you earlier. His words on the balcony, his promise to you now, they all meant something. He wouldn’t do that only to lie to you, so you breathed.
Aang could tell that it had shaken you, telling by the stiffness of your body against his. He smiled a bit to himself before his eyes fell down to the crown of your head.
“And I want you to come with me.”
Your head shot up, meeting the playful glint in his eyes. Your heart skipped a beat.
“Do you really?”
His hand, that rested at your hip, stroked along your skin, his gaze holding yours.
“I made a promise to you, right?”
He placed a warm kiss to your forehead, making your face split into a smile also.
“I know…but hey! Don’t say that like you have to tag me along!” You pouted.
“I’m not, I swear!” He exclaimed with a brighter smile and laugh that shook his shoulders. “I want you to come with me. I want to travel the skies with you, scour and gather more airbender relics and maybe stop at different places just for the fun of it. Maybe help people along the way, but I want to do all of those things with you by my side this time.”
“Even if it gets dangerous?”
Aang paused for a moment and just looked at you. There was a tiny worry that he was taking the silence to rethink his decision to bring you along when he spoke again.
“You can handle yourself. I know that and when you can’t, I’ll be there to protect you. No matter what we face, we’ll face it together.”
It felt like your heart had crawled out of its hiding hole somewhere in your stomach and had soared right through your chest. It was all that you’d wanted to hear from him. To be able to still love him as deeply as you did and to be able to accept him for who he was to the people of the nations—it was the perfect middle ground. There was never a need to ‘fix’ you or him.
Instead, balance was all you ever needed and you knew you would always find that with him.
Your eyes fell to his lips and back up to the shining grey of his eyes.
“I love you.”
His hand moved from your hip to the nape of your neck, gently pulling you closer.
“And I love you.”
When your lips met, it was softer this time; slower. The kind of kiss that carried understanding within it rather than desperation.
You and Aang knew that there would still be difficult days ahead. That there would be arguments, distance and that familiar sense of fear that came with being the wife of the Avatar. Loving Aang would never come without sacrifice and being loved by you would always leave parts of him frighteningly exposed.
But this—this felt like balance.
Like finally meeting one another in the middle after spending so much time pulling at opposite ends.
And somehow, within the quiet warmth of his mouth against yours and the steady hand cradling the back of your neck, tomorrow no longer felt so frightening.
It felt like a promise for a new beginning.
༄ ... mini bonus scene ! ... ༄
The next day was spent making up for lost time.
Which basically means you and Aang barely left the bedroom to eat or even drink water.
Still, despite the time that you'd spent with him, you made sure not to forget about your visit with Katara the next day after that.
When you and Aang arrived, Sokka had answered the door and was happy to see you but as soon as he saw Aang, he'd nearly tackled his taller friend to the ground.
"You're back?! I had no idea you were back!" Sokka exclaimed with a wide smile that instantly turned into a frown, playfully hitting Aang's shoulder.
"Ow?" Aang rose a brow, rubbing his arm with a smile back.
"Don't 'ow' me! You could've let your best friend know you were back all this time, sheesh," Sokka shook his head, scratching his neck. "Some friend you are."
Katara came up next to her brother, and pinched at his ear like they were teens all over again.
"Leave Aang alone. He came back like, two days ago. What are you on about?"
"Sokka," You heard Suki whine in the background. "Give the poor guy a break. He did just come back."
Sokka sweatdropped, looking at the four of you before his eyes stopped on you. He smirked, and fully leaned against the door frame.
"Oh, did he now," He nodded, looking as if he knew something no one else did. "Yep, bet he did come."
Aang's eyes widened and so did yours. That was all Sokka could get out before Katara took him and his ear further into the house, giving him a real good talking to. He'd looked to Suki to help him, claiming that just because they were married, she had to protect him. She only smiled, and continued helping Zuko.
Both of you laughed and stepped inside, seeing Zuko setting up the last part of a banner that said, 'Welcome home, Aang.'
"Aw, guys," Aang pouted at the banner and his friends. "You shouldn't have!"
"Yeah, well, we almost didn't, twinkletoes," Toph grumbled rather loudly to herself, digging her pinky deep off into her ear. "I told them its a complete waste of time. You'll only end up knocking it to the-"
Before she could finish her sentence, Aang used his airbending to bring the gaang all together for a group hug, causing the banner to fly right off of the wooden beam it was expertly attached to. Toph, squeezed right between Sokka and Zuko huffed.
"-ground."
She sighed.
You couldn't help but smile as they all started to laugh, even Toph, catching her shake her head. Suki had her face squished into Sokka's, Katara had her arm around you and Zuko while Aang's long arms nearly wrapped around everyone.
As you melted into the group hug, you couldn't imagine being anywhere else in the world but with your husband and the best group of friends anyone could ever ask for.
༄ author’s end note: tysm for reading! don't forget to tell me your thoughts in the comments and leave a like/reblog! i would lovee to know what you guys think as this may not be my one and only piece of work in this fandom (wink, wink). time will tell... ~
Unfortunately, his physically. Fortunately, yours mentally (Part 1).
Slightly inspired by “Promise” - Laufey.
“It hurts to be something, It’s worse to be nothing with you.”
Yearner!Adult!Toph x Princess!F!Reader
Content: SFW/Implied NSFW, Fluff, heavy angst, hurt/comfort, light swearing, may contain grammatical errors, Not proofread, implied emotional self-harm, lore inaccuracies, slight TLOK spoilers, and etc.
Sypnosis: Being the princess of the Northern Water Tribe already gave you too much stress, but now you were expected to marry a guy you met thrice in your entire life? Now that was new. Running away probably wasn’t the best decision, but you weren’t completely helpless when Aang and Katara found you and decided you’d be in Toph’s supervision for the meantime.
a/n: been sitting in my drafts for a whole month so nobody better attack me on how bunssss it is😢 was gonna be a oneshot since this is my first fanfic but it would take me years to finish so im posting it in parts. HOPE U LIKE IT
❥ Ever since your older sister, Princess Yue, became the Moon Spirit, your father, Chief Arnook, decided that your wedding would happen when you're 21, becoming extremely overprotective of his last daughter, not wanting you to end up like Yue. He was determined to spend more time with you before you were required to be married to your arranged husband, Siku. You’ve asked him multiple times to let you choose your own partner, but he was convinced that it would be too “careless” and “dangerous” to let you choose God knows who.
❥ The day of your 21st birthday finally came. You were nervous, but it wasn't as extreme as the terrified pounding in your heart. It was as if your heart was ready to jump out of your body and eat you alive. It was then that you realized you weren't ready at all.
You were already engaged to Siku since you were 16. Sure, he was a decent guy; handsome, rich, intelligent, but you wouldn't really say so on the nice side. You've seen him yell at people for no reason and you for sure didn't wanna be tied down to someone who lacks human decency for the rest of your life. So, you did what you had to do.
❥ On the night of your birthday, you decided to run away. While Katara, Aang, and Sokka were on their way to celebrate your birthday, Sokka spotted you crossing one of the ice bridges wearing a dark cloak. They then decided to land Appa to see what was happening. You told them how you felt about this marriage, how unsure you are about marrying someone you barely knew. They ultimately agreed to bring you along to Republic City.
❥ This was definitely the first time you went to Republic City, though you've only ever been to the Southern Water Tribe. Aang chose to leave you in Toph's supervision for now. They dropped you off at her Metalbending Academy.
You were aware of who Toph Beifong was, who wasn't? She was one of the best Earthbenders ever. So, when Katara said that you'd be dropped off at Toph's place, you were extremely surprised and even more nervous. You? Meeting the Toph Beifong? It felt like you were on cloud 9. You've always admired how carefree and confident Toph was; she was the complete opposite of you, constantly being told what to do and what not to do. You sometimes wished you could live a life like hers someday.
❥ When you arrived at Toph's Metalbending Academy, it was pretty dark, but you could see that the academy was quite big, and in the middle of the training ground, Toph was there. When Appa landed safely, you started admiring the view around you, but your thoughts drifted elsewhere. You couldn't help but feel a pang of guilt after leaving your father behind, but you knew it was the right decision.
❥ Toph was skeptical of you at first, thinking that you were another spoiled brat who didn't know any better, but when Katara explained your situation, Toph let her guard down just a bit.
"Seriously? Now you're letting me babysit some princess?"
Toph says, with a slight scoff, "There was no real bite to it, but you could tell she was slightly irritated."
"She just needs a few days to stay, Toph. Just let her stay here for a few months until we can find her a permanent place."
Katara says in a soft yet understanding voice as she gets off Appa.
Toph stays silent for a bit before responding,
"Fine. I could use a little help with the chores here anyway."
She says before looking at you with her milky eyes,
"Alright, princess. Follow me."
You follow her instantly, not wanting to make her any more irritated. Though you found her attitude quite irritating.
❥ It’s been a month since you moved in with Toph in the academy. It was actually pretty easy to get along with Toph, just don’t do things that could potentially piss her off, but other than that she’s pretty fun to hang out with.
You’ve recently started training Waterbending with Katara since you barely knew how to defend yourself. After the lessons, surprisingly, Toph agreed to spar with you and would even leave snarky comments if you ever missed her by just a few inches. Toph can sometimes be hard-headed, but you were still thankful that she took you in knowing that she could’ve left you in the streets.
Toph didn't really have an issue with you whatsoever. Though, she couldn't figure out why she instantly felt a strange connection with you, knowing you’ve only been here a few weeks. Maybe it was when she’d ask you a question and you’d answer truthfully every time, not that you’d have anything to gain by lying in the first place. She trusted you enough to give you a nickname, Pebbles. Sure, it wasn't really original since she used it years ago, but it fit you too well.
❥ You were sitting at the front steps of the academy, observing Toph spar with her students as she destroyed them one by one. You look up at the sky realizing it was almost sunset, and you call over Toph to tell her it was time to go on a journey to the market. This was one of your daily routines with Toph.
“Seriously? It's that time already?”
Toph absolutely despises going to the market since she thinks it's “boring”, but hey, you make it a lot less boring.
You take her to the market to buy ingredients for your dinner tonight. You needed one more item to complete your dinner, so, you approached one of the stalls that sold tomatoes. The vendor noticed you were heading to his stall and quickly hid the wooden sign that said “2 Yuan”
“Excuse me Sir, how much are the tomatoes?”
You asked politely, picking up one of the tomatoes to check its quality.
“Hmm.. Normally they would be 7 yuan since these are beautifully harvested, but for you, I’ll make it 5 yuan.”
The strange vendor says with a smug grin playing on his face, obviously trying to squeeze you for some more money.
“You’re lying. You’re a terrible liar, I can practically feel you shaking on the ground.”
Toph retorted to the vendor. You knew she hated liars and this guy was especially bad at it.
The vendor laughs nervously before responding.
“Uhh.. Actually, the prices just went down to 2 Yuan! What a coincidence!”
You couldn't help but chuckle a bit at the obvious lie, but then you noticed it's almost getting dark. You quickly purchased 2 tomatoes and headed back to the academy.
❥ After finishing both your meals, you both got ready for bed. You were in Toph’s room, brushing out her long jet-black hair.
“Is this really necessary? My hair doesn't need all this caring y’know.”
She said with an irritated pout on her lips. She was extremely impatient when it came to taking care of herself, frankly, she never even really thought about how she looked until you came along.
“Of course it does! Just cause you’re blind doesn't make your appearance any less important.”
You responded teasingly. It wasn’t a lie though, Toph was indeed beautiful, and you knew she could tell you weren't lying.
Toph lets out a loud yawn before responding.
“Must be true then. Fine, I’ll let you brush my hair just for a little longer.”
She liked it when you complimented her looks, not that she really cared about it. Though, it did make her want to put more care into her appearance.
You noticed her obnoxiously loud yawn and chuckled a bit.
“You seem tired. Don’t worry, I’ll wrap this soon. You need your rest to y’know.”
“I know I do, but that yawn was nothing. I yawn all the time! It’s not anything outta the ordinary, you’re thinking too much. Just.. Keep going until I say so, got that?”
Toph leaned her head closer to you, insisting that you continue.
You laughed loudly, before going on with whatever you were doing.
❥ You’ve met Toph for nearly a year now. Not much has changed, but it was obvious that you both grew a lot closer.
You’ve just completed your lessons with Katara. Now, it was your turn to demonstrate what you had learned to Toph. However, you always got the feeling that this was her way of trying to kill you, she always showed no mercy on you! Though, you can’t deny that she helped you improve by a lot.
When Toph reached the training grounds, she smirked, looking at you mockingly,
“Ready to train hard today, Pebbles? Let’s see if you can land a hit on me this time.”
Unfortunately for you, you were once again defeated. Though, you did manage to leave a slight bruise on her shoulder earlier, which boosted your ego by just a bit.
Now, you’ve known you had feelings for Toph, for a few months now actually. Sure, she was sometimes annoying, but she showed you that home can be in the form of a person. She was someone you adored deeply. You’ve thought about telling her your growing love for her, but each time you tried, you swore you could’ve peed your pants out of sheer nervousness.
It wasn’t that you were afraid of rejection, you could take that easily. You figured that since you were already engaged with Siku, the chance of you two getting together was extremely low. You knew that you’d never end up together, and that was fine. As long as it meant you’d spend most of your days with Toph, it was a better outcome than any confession could give.
❥ It was already quite dark, and you both were in Toph’s room. You were attempting to heal the bruise you accidentally caused during training after she complained that it “hurt badly.” You didn't believe her, but you didn't say anything.
Toph would never admit it, but she appreciated it when you took care of her, brushing her hair or healing her bruises after training, as you’re doing now. She cherished the time she got to spend with you since she barely got to. She liked the thought of having someone trustworthy enough that she could share quiet moments with.
Toph suddenly yelped in discomfort before scolding me.
“Ow! Can’t you go any slower, Pebbles?!”
“I- Excuse you?! I’m trying, but your hand won't stay still. I can practically feel your nervousness from here.”
You shot back at her with a light pout on your face. It was pretty normal for you guys to argue over small stuff. Somehow, you were always the one to start it.
You weren’t really wrong about her nervousness either. She was tense, but for a totally different reason. The real reason was how close you were to her, and she could practically feel your breath on her neck.
Toph coughs a bit to break the awkwardness before asking a question.
“Are you really not going to go back and marry that prick? I know I know, should’ve asked this a long time ago, but I can’t help asking.”
She asked as if she wanted to hear the answer she wished for.
You thought about it for a minute before answering.
“Definitely not! He’s too cocky and bossy, I can't stand guys like him.”
You declared mockingly.
“Sounds like an awful lot like me.. Is this your way of saying you secretly dislike me?”
Toph says mockingly, she didn't mean it, of course, but it would feel good to hear some reassurance.
You chuckled a bit as you finished healing her bruise.
“Hey, even if you are sometimes annoying, you’re actually fun to have around. You guys aren’t alike at all!”
You retorted back before dropping the water on top of Toph’s head, causing her to be soaking wet.
It was almost midnight so you ultimately decided to head back to your room. You stood up, but before you could even begin to move, Toph grabbed your hand tightly.
“You aren’t going anywhere, you're staying with me tonight.”
She said as she pulled you back down beside her.
“What? I haven’t even agreed to it yet..”
“Well, were you gonna say no?”
She waited for your answer, though she already knew what it was.
“I was seriously considering it, but I guess saying no to you isn’t an option..”
❥ Toph could barely sleep that night. Her thoughts were filled with you and she couldn’t explain why. She started overthinking, what if you returned to the North Pole? What if you chose that man over her? She felt like a mess, she couldn't keep hiding it forever.
Toph never told anyone about her growing feelings for you, she always assumed that it was because you were the only person that she could easily spend time with. Unlike Katara and the rest of the Gaang, they were pretty busy with work. You were really the only person who was around 24/7, and honestly, she would’ve never chosen anyone else to spend her days with.
She loved you, more than words could express. So, she showed it through her actions, always helping you out with chores, complimenting your cooking, and even spending quiet nights like this with you. Hell, if she were given the chance to marry you, she’d accept it in a heartbeat.
She planned on telling you, she really did, but she knew that it wouldn't work out. She figured that since you were already engaged to Siku, you two could never be together.
Maybe getting some rest would relax her a tad bit, she thought, but remembering the betrothal necklace you mentioned to her kept the nightmares lingering. She knew she had to tell you soon, she just had to wait for the perfect time. She was willing to do anything at all to keep you by her side.
❥ One morning, Aang and Katara arrived at the academy urgently. You saw them land Appa at the training ground and Katara rushing down to hand you what looked like a letter. You and Toph rushed outside to check what was going on.
Katara handed you a letter with a concerned look,
“Your dad sent us a letter, he knows you’re staying with Toph and needs you to return to the North Pole.”
“…Did he say why? There has to be a reason. He wouldn’t just send a letter for no reason.”
You urgently opened the letter, reading it thoroughly; your face turning pale as you continued to go over each word.
“The North Pole’s running out of resources, Siku’s parents can help but in return, I’d need to agree to the wedding.”
You paused for a long moment before ultimately deciding on your final decision.
“Tell my dad I’ll be back home by next week.”
You stated sternly, leaving no room for argument. They knew this wasn’t your decision, it was your father’s.
“Are you sure? The second I-“
“Yes, I’m sure.”
You cut Katara off harshly.
Meanwhile, Toph felt her heart drop. Her eyes shot wide open as she let your words sink in; there's no way you’d actually leave her, right? That’s what Toph wanted to think, at least. She knew you were sincere the entire time, but this was the first time she wished she was wrong.
❥ That evening, you were once again in Toph’s room, gently brushing out her hair before heading to bed. You both stayed silent the entire day, neither of you attempting to break the silence. That is, until Toph decided to.
“You’re not changing your mind... are you?"
She questioned, her voice unusually reserved.
“Even if I wanted to, I... I just can’t..”
You paused for a bit, letting your fingers run through her hair.
Toph turned to face you, her face filled with frustration as you met her cloudy eyes. You felt her fingers tracing your jaw before her thumb traced your lips. She leans in closer, her lips brushing against yours lightly. She slowly closed the gap between you before finally pressing her lips against yours ever so gently.
Your breath hitched slightly, but instead of pulling away, you cupped her cheek and kissed her back tenderly as you felt her arm slowly wrap around your waist. You both stayed in that position for a while, that was until you felt her tears trickle down your knuckles. You decided to pull away to brush away her tears, but it was no use. Before you could say anything else, Toph broke down in tears, letting out a loud sob, and you knew exactly why.
You both knew you loved each other, yet neither of you wanted to admit it. You both knew that no matter how strong your feelings were, you were destined to be with another man. So you both pretended that being friends was something you were both content with, but you knew it wasn’t. Now, all that hiding caused her to fall apart. She was tired of pretending that she didn’t want you, tired of pretending that the thought of you marrying someone else didn't destroy her.
Toph buried her face in your shoulder, her breath quickly coming out in hitched gasps.
“Don’t l-leave me... Please.. Fuck. I.. I love you...”
She pleaded, her voice shaky and quiet.
You cupped her cheeks, placing a quick kiss on top of her head before responding.
“I won’t. I promise.”
That moment alone nearly made you rethink your decision.
❥ You spent the night making love with Toph, even though you knew you shouldn't. You knew this was wrong, and she did too, but neither of you cared. Toph was someone important to you, and every second needed to be spent with her. You knew you’d eventually have to let her go, but the very idea of it nearly ends you right on the spot.
Toph on the other hand knew your promise was nothing but a hoax to keep her grounded, but to her, it felt real enough for her to keep believing that you’d stay with her. To her, that night was hell and heaven in one.
Oooo! May I request a Lin Beifong x female!firebender!reader who's almost 20 years younger than Lin (she's still obviously an adult) and Lin is a little unsure of the blooming relationship, you've been on a couple stay-at-home dates at Lin's request and y'all haven't really discussed what you are. Lin confides in Suyin with her insecurities about the age gap between you two after Suyin walks in on a private, intimate moment between you two while you're both visiting the city Zaofu. Please and thank you! And no worries if you don't want to write this.
Also I apologize if there's too much detail please feel free to add or remove whatever you like! I'm sure I'll love it either way 😁
Ill at ease
lin beifong masterlist | tv show masterlist | main masterlist
Lin Beifong x Reader
2,003 words
a/n - this was suuuper cute, thanks anon! xx
A warm, sandalwood-scented candle glows an orange hue from the centre of the dinner table. Soft, string instruments play a tune from a radio from somewhere else in the room. You’re back in a kitchen you’ve become familiar with, it’s the only place you ever go on a date.
“This is amazing, Lin, you’ve really outdone yourself this time,” you hum in satisfaction after you take the first bite of the plate she placed in front of you.
You watch as she shakes her head at the praise, a smile on her lips, nonetheless, one that she covers with a glass of red wine, “You always say that whenever I cook, how am I meant to know you aren’t lying?”
“Isn’t that your job?” You tease with a waggle of your eyebrow, and Lin rolls her eyes in response. “Chief.”
Her jaw clenches at the title and, if you weren’t as perceptive as you were, you would’ve said that she enjoyed you calling her chief, however the look in her eye told you otherwise. It was complicated; Lin was complicated, but it also made you feel head over heels for the woman.
Lin did, in fact, like you calling her chief, it had her heart beating like it was trying to run away from her. But, it also reminded her that she was older, that she was the one with the power, the one in control, and that you were younger. Way younger. It made her feel as if she was taking advantage of you, that she was somehow forcing and manipulating you into being in a relationship with her. When she knew better than anyone else, that it was quite the opposite. It was you that had pursued her, it was you that made the first move, and it was you with all the power if you knew it or not.
The feeling of you taking her hand pulls her out of her thoughts, and you smile at her softly - the one that makes all her worries melt away.
“Come with me to Zaofu,” Lin proposes.
It’s a big step in your relationship and as soon as the offer hangs in the air you both realise how heavy it is. Lin swallows as she searches your face.
“As us, or as co-workers?”
The question is delivered with a bite you didn’t know was going to happen and it dampens the mood instantly, you might as well have bent the candle flame out and thrown the plate on the floor.
A beat passes and you pull your hand back to your lap, Lin’s fingers are stretched out toward you, you already know the answer.
“I’ll think about it,” you pause, the hurt evident in your voice, “let’s just finish our dinner.”
Lin’s green eyes are sad as she watches you compile another bite onto your fork, and an apology hooks itself, achingly, in the middle of her throat. She is sorry that she can’t give you the love that you deserve; sorry that the love that you so openly crave is the same that she can’t bring herself to admit that she wants too.
— — — — —
As the train passes into Zaofu territory, the metal domes become larger by the second, you find yourself putting distance between you and Lin. You agreed to join her, of course you did, which also meant you agreed to act professionally when others were around. Lin’s job was very important to her, you knew that, but whatever it was that you guys had going on was not against the rules. Lin wasn’t your boss, she didn’t even work in the same department as you. Something else was bothering her and, lately, you were losing sleep over it - tossing and turning and worrying yourself of the worst.
The train slows before coming to a stop, and Lin’s already waiting for the doors to open. Her arms crossed over her chest with that cute, serious look on her face. You join her just as the doors begin to move and the two of you are instantly greeted by her sister, Suyin.
“Lin!” She smiles warmly, with open arms. The resemblance between the two is hard to miss and, yet, Suyin’s already so different. “And you must be Lin’s assistant,” she says as her attention turns to you and you can feel the way Lin tenses up next to you.
“Uh- yes,” you stumble but quickly recover with a polite nod of your head, “you can call me Y/n.”
“Welcome to Zaofu,” you thank her with a nod of your head, “would you like a tour? My husband would be happy to show you around.”
You catch Lin’s eye, “Would that be alright?” She gives you a sharp nod in response.
The question makes her feel sick to her stomach, she hates that everyone thinks that you’re her assistant and she can’t tell if she hates the fact that you’ve melded so easily into the role more. She watches as you join Baatar who is quick to start talking animatedly about his city.
“So, what have you been up to?” Suyin asks, coming into Lin’s view and blocking you out.
An hour after dinner is the next time the two of you are next alone. After showering and changing into your sleepwear, you find yourself knocking on Lin’s door. As soon as it swings open, you can’t help the dopey smile that instantly pulls at your lips; Lin stands in front of you dressed in her white tank, the one that shows off the muscles that she hides under her uniform. She’s not surprised to see you, she knew that you’d be at her door sooner than later.
“Good evening,” you smirk, making your way into her room and tugging her towards her bed whilst she pushes the door closed.
“Good evening to you too,” she smiles as you pull her onto the bed, sitting her down in front of you with a sweet kiss to her lips.
You hug her from behind, jaw resting on her shoulder so that you could see her face.
“Dinner was amazing,” you begin, “it was like nothing I’d ever tasted before.”
“If you’re lucky, I might be able to get the recipe for you.” You hum happily in response and she can feel the vibration of it against her skin.
“What’s on your mind?” You ask, and it shocks her because she didn’t notice that her face had fallen and she realises that something has in fact been bugging her.
She lets out a defeated sigh, her body slumping with it and your fingers are carding through the back of her hair in a soothing manner, “I never said that you were my assistant, Suyin just assumed, I should’ve said something,” she mumbles in regret.
You smile empathetically at the way she’s tearing herself up at it, “It’s okay, Lin, I don’t mind, really, plus it makes more sense as to why I’m with you. Don't worry, everything’s going to be just fine.”
Your hand smooths down the back of her neck, igniting a gentle warmth which spreads through her tense muscles, and her eyes flutter close in response. You press a gentle kiss to her jaw.
The door suddenly swings open.
Lin jumps to her feet instantly, and you’re taking your hands off of her as fast as you can.
Suyin stands in the doorway.
A beat of still silence passes, your heart beating quickly in your chest.
“Y/n, you’re excused.” You hear Lin order and you look up at her before moving, her anger is almost tangible. You leave the bed as swiftly as you can and then out through the door, giving Suyin a polite smile as she swaps places with you. The slamming of the metal door causes you to jump at the loud noise.
“Do you ever knock?” You hear Lin’s muffled shout from behind the walls, and you find yourself gritting your teeth - it was only the first night and your plan had already gone to shit. Shit.
— — — — —
The next few days were quiet, though they consisted of following Lin around, you hadn’t actually spent any time with her. You didn’t knock on her door the following nights after Suyin had walked in because, like an oyster, Lin had closed up, and she didn’t need to tell you either. From the way she had acted the morning after, keeping words short and professional and barely glancing your way, you knew not to come searching for her.
You mentally kicked yourself, you knew it was going to end up like this. You never should have come. You should have gone with your gut in the first place and stayed home, but you had a feeling that it was going to be different this time. Of course you and Lin had your hardships, like any relationship did, but you shouldn’t have to feel like this - alone by your girlfriend’s side. Because that’s what she was to you, you just hoped that she thought of you as the same.
The time apart, and the reason for it, was taking its toll on Lin too. It was eating her alive. She eyed Suyin from the corner of her eye; she hadn’t mentioned it, no indication to whether she had even seen it or not, but there was no way she could have missed it. You were quite literally wrapped around her. What did she think of her? Did she think badly? Like she was some kind of corruptor? Fuck, she couldn’t take it anymore.
“The other night-” Lin suddenly began causing her sister to turn to her. “I-” she sighed, “I want to ask what you thought.” She searched her eyes.
“Of you and Y/n?” Lin nodded her head. “You’re together?” Lin nodded her head again. Suyin shrugged her shoulders.
“Honestly,” Lin urged, pleadingly.
“She’s your assistant-”
“-She isn’t.”
“She’s not?”
Lin shook her head, “She doesn’t even work in the same department.”
“Then, what?”
“You don’t think it’s weird?” Lin mumbles and her sister looks at her blankly. “That she’s younger?”
“Do you?”
The question makes her pause for a moment.
Suyin starts again, a hand on her hip, “You’re both adults, it’s not as if she’s only just turned twenty, she’s been an adult for a while, you’re overthinking, Lin, always chasing your own tail, just let yourself breathe, stop for a minute and think about what you want and not what others will think cause honestly no one’s going to bat an eye.” She gives Lin a tight-lipped smile, a knowing look in her eyes, and gives her a light pat on the shoulder, “I’ll see you at dinner,” she says before leaving Lin alone.
A few hours later, at the dinner table, you, wordlessly, take your place next to Lin. What you don’t expect is for Lin to lean over, so close that her breath tickles the shell of your ear. You eye everyone else at the table, conscious about how close she is.
“We should talk later,” she whispers, and anxiety instantly causes your heart to stutter and for your stomach to drop.
But then, even more surprisingly, you feel her take your hand from underneath the table - her fingers curling against your own - before placing it on top. For all to see. You turn your head then, a questioning look on your face and your eyebrows furrowed, and she’s looking back with a content look on her face before giving you a small smile and mouthing the word ‘later’.
God, you should be mad, so mad, but the spreading warmth in your chest is hard to miss. She really needed to work on her communication, but how could you stay mad? Especially when she was trying. You nod your head and return the smile. You were right, this time was different, and for the rest of the dinner Lin’s hand could be found resting on your knee or behind the small of your back.
Genuinely I need the ENTIRE Beifong family tree because Toph looked too damn good in the flashbacks in TLOK AND DONT GET ME STARTED ON LIN AND SUYIN MY GOD HOLD ME BACK
Synopsis: While on a date Toph confesses she wishes she could see you. Based on this request.
Content/Warnings: sfw, kissing, picnic date, emotional toph, fluff, kinda suggestive towards the end, flirting.
You had a feeling when you woke up that morning and dressed for your date with Toph, that your life was about to change. At the time, though, you couldn’t have guessed in what way.
By evening, the world seemed to hold its breath around you two. A cool breeze wandered through the sweeping branches of the great willow trees, stirring their silver-green leaves into a hush of whispers overhead. The air around you was heavy with the rich perfume of blooming jasmine, its sweetness drifting through the secluded clearing like something soft and sacred.
You and Toph were nestled close atop a soft woolen blanket spread thick across the grass, an open wicker picnic basket resting between you like a small offering. Inside lay the remains of the quiet feast you had prepared with careful hands.
Spicy fire-flakes sat scattered at the bottom beside a platter of half eaten miniature sandwiches you brought from one of your favorite spots. To satisfy Toph's sweet tooth you packed some ripe moon-peaches which were rare and difficult to find, their fragrant skin still warm from being plucked fresh.
Tucked carefully beside them was a steaming thermos of tea, brewed for nearly an hour until it was crafted exactly the way Toph liked it. Every once in a while she would offer you her cup so you could heat the liquid with your bending because if it wasn't scalding hot she wouldn't drink it.
The two of you had been wrapped in the rare luxury of complete isolation, hidden away in a forgotten corner of the park. It was a tranquil refuge Toph had stumbled upon during one of her patrols, a place so far removed from the rest of the world that she insisted no wandering crowds would ever find you here.
Yet, as the sun slowly dips below the horizon and the quiet afternoon softened into dusk, you picked up on subtle change in the air.
Over the slow sips of her tea, you notice that Toph has grown uncharacteristically still. The easy, playful banter from earlier had faded into a gentle stillness that seemed to settle over her shoulders, grounding her in a deep, contemplative silence.
Toph frequently drifted into these silent spaces beside you, retreating into the depths of her mind as though navigating a world entirely of her own. It was never a sign of distance, she made it undeniably clear that every moment spent enveloped in your presence was something she deeply cherished.
But you could tell with the approach of your one year anniversary that a force was pulling at her. An unvoiced turbulence of thoughts and hidden vulnerabilities she wasn't quite ready to lay bare before you just yet.
“Toph?” You turned to look at her, your hand reaching out to cradle her jaw as you pressed your thumb into her cheek, soothing the tension forming there.
Toph leaned into your touch, her eyes closing as she let out a shaky breath. The usual rigidity in her posture began to ease beneath your hand, leaving her looking softer and more vulnerable than she ever allowed herself to be around the rest of the world.
“I can tell something is bothering you.” You say as your fingertip swept gently beneath her eye, brushing away a fallen lash that had caught there. “You're never this quiet.”
She hums thoughtfully, the sound rumbling in her throat. Without a word, she moves the picnic basket out of the way, closing what little distance remained between you. Toph then eases down onto your lap. Her muscular arms wrapping tightly around your waist as she buries her face against your stomach.
The sudden need for physical closeness catches you completely off guard, sending a spike of concern through your chest.
Something was really troubling her, and you had no way of reaching whatever storm had drawn her so deeply inward.
“Just thinking,” Her voice emerges after a long moment, softened where it was muffled against the fabric of your shirt.
“About what?” You wondered aloud, encouraging her to keep going as you thread your fingers through her hair, gently massaging her scalp to ease her mind.
She attempted a shrug, but the movement was awkward against your lap. So she simply pressed her face deeper into your stomach, as if trying to burrow away from the sudden intensity of her own vulnerability.
“You, us, everything,” Toph mumbles, the words bleeding into the fabric of your shirt.
Your fingers faltered in her hair, freezing entirely as a sharp spike of anxiety hit your chest. “Oh.”
“It’s nothing bad,” She added quickly. Sensing the sudden, erratic leap of your pulse beneath her cheek, she knew you were already starting to spiral.
Toph pulled away just enough to turn, rolling over onto her back so her head remained comfortably rested in your lap. She stared blankly up at the vast, darkening sky, her fingers loosely curling around the hem of your shirt to keep you close.
“I just love you a lot,” Toph proclaims, her voice dropping into a low, almost inaudible whisper. “And sometimes I just wish-”
She grits her teeth, stopping herself mid-sentence. You can already feel her slipping away, the familiar metal walls slamming back up as she tries to bury whatever she was about to reveal.
Refusing to let her retreat, you tighten your fingers gently but firmly in her hair. Your other hand moves swiftly to curl around her jaw, tilting her head so she has no choice but to face you, her clouded eyes staring into yours earnestly.
You don't need to say a word. Every measured, unwavering thump of your heart revealed everything she needed to know. Through that shared pulse, and the gentleness of your touch. You promised her that she was entirely safe here. No matter what confession she voices in this secluded clearing, it would never change how you feel about her. In fact, her honesty would only make you love her more.
“I wish I could see you,” She finally settles on, the admission tearing out of her as tears begin to gather in her eyes. “Your smile, your eyes, even that tiny dimple in your cheek that pops out every time I kiss you, the one you always claim you don't have.”
“Because I don't!” You manage a soft laugh, though your heart aches for her, Your thumb soothingly traces a reassuring pattern across her cheek in hopes of calming the racing of her heart.
“You do, baby, I can feel it every single time,” Toph insists, her voice cracking slightly under the gravity of the moment.
“Whatever you say, Chief.” You relent affectionately, yielding the point this one time.
“Anyways,” Toph’s voice trailed off, the sudden swell of emotion catching painfully in her throat. She lifted her hand slowly, her fingers trembling faintly as they traced along the line of your jaw with a reverence that made your chest ache.
“What I’m trying to say is,” Her thumb drew circles across your cheek. “There are parts of you the rest of the world just gets to have.”
“They get to see you walking down the street, hear your laugh, watch the sun land on your face.” Her voice roughened with quiet longing. “And they don’t even realize how lucky they are to witness that.”
Toph swallowed hard before leaning closer, her forehead nearly resting against yours.
“It makes me jealous sometimes,” She stated. “Because you’re mine.” Her fingers curled gently against your skin. “And there are days I wish I could keep every single part of you all to myself.”
You remained motionless at first, completely caught off guard by the raw honesty in her voice. The confession settled heavily in your chest, so intimate and raw that for a moment all you could do was stare at her in stunned silence.
Then, slowly, you lifted your hand from her jaw and let your fingers glide gently along her skin until they found her unsteady hand resting against your cheek. You carefully intertwined your fingers with hers, giving them a soft, reassuring squeeze before guiding her palm fully against the side of your face.
You leaned into her touch without hesitation as you closed your eyes for a brief moment, silently encouraging her to feel every piece of you she longed for.
“Then let me show you,” You intoned, the words wrapped in certainty as you pressed her palm more firmly against your cheek. “Don’t look at me with the world’s eyes, Toph.”
Your expression softened beneath her touch. “Look at me the way you always have. With your hands and your heart.”
You slowly guide her index finger up to the smooth skin at the outer corner of your eyelid.
“If you could see my eyes,” You whispered tenderly, allowing her to feel the delicate flutter of your lashes against her fingertips, “You’d see a deep, radiant gold.”
A soft breath left you as you leaned further into her touch.
“Not the kind of metal you bend beneath your hands every day. Nothing cold or rigid.” Your voice softened into something almost dreamlike. “More like the liquid light of a setting sun spilling across the horizon.”
You kept her hand there, letting her map every delicate detail through touch alone.
“Think of them as a serene kind of comfort that always settles whenever they find you.” Your thumb swept lovingly across her knuckles. “And mirrored at their very center would be a sanctuary of amber fire, a steady, devoted flame that was kindled in the dark just to guide you home, burning only ever for you.”
You guided her hand downward, letting her fingertips wander along the elegant slope of your cheekbone before tracing the clean line of your jaw. You could feel the careful way she memorized every contour beneath her touch, as though she were sculpting your face inside her mind.
“My features carry that distinct grace the Fire Nation is known for,” You explain, guiding her palm to rest fully against your skin. “There’s refinement in the shape of them, sharp, deliberate lines softened by warmth.”
“My face is smooth beneath your hands, but there’s still strength in it. The kind your fingers would recognize immediately.” A faint smile touched your lips. “The striking edges of my nation shaped into something softer by the fire living inside me.”
You leaned further into her touch, your voice lowering into something achingly sincere. “But I want you to understand that it only burns this calmly because it reflects you.”
“Because when I look at you, baby. I don't just see the fierce warrior everyone else admires. I see a beautiful, intricate landscape, someone whose hidden softness is a treasure that I am lucky enough to hold.”
Toph’s breath hitches sharply at your words, the sudden depth of your confession striking a chord deep within her. Her fingers faltered faintly against your jaw as emotion tightened painfully in her throat, forcing her to swallow hard around it.
You could feel the realization settling over her in quiet waves- that you truly saw beyond the loud, unbreakable image she showed the rest of the world. Beyond the stubborn bravado, the sharpened edges, and strength she wielded like armor.
A silent tear slipped from her sightless eyes, tracing a slow path down her flushed skin as she melted fully into your embrace.
Your own chest tightened painfully beneath the sheer weight of the moment, emotion swelling so intensely inside you it nearly stole the breath from your lungs. And still, you refused to stop, she needed to hear this.
You needed her to understand that while the rest of the world only ever saw fleeting pieces of you- passing glimpses, surface-level beauty, and fragments they would never fully comprehend. Toph was the only person who had ever reached beyond all of that. She was the only one who truly held the keys to your soul.
Carefully, you move her finger along the edge of your eyelid, where the smooth texture of your skin changes slightly.
“And right here, I wore something special for you tonight,” You shared sweetly, guiding her fingertip along the elegant sweep lining your eye. “A delicate stroke of Fire Nation ink tracing the curve of it, meant to make the gold of my eyes stand out more boldly.”
“And above it, there’s a dusting of shimmer across my eyelids,” You added, your voice lowering beneath the hush of the clearing. “So fine it feels almost weightless beneath your fingertips, like the softest silk.”
The willow branches swayed gently overhead while you leaned further into her palm, savoring the careful way she explored every detail.
“To everyone else, it only catches the light for a fleeting second before it disappears.” Your voice wavered under the weight of your affection. “But tonight, it was meant for you. A private canvas made entirely for your touch.”
Toph’s tears fell completely unchecked now, tracing a hot, relentless path down her cheeks as she clung to every word leaving your lips. Even though there was a quiet ache blooming inside your own chest, you kept going.
Slowly, you gathered a thick section of your long hair into your free hand before carefully guiding her unsteady fingers through the silken strands. The dark locks slipped smoothly between her fingertips, cool and weightless against her skin as you let her explore them at her own pace.
“You always tell me it feels like water running through your hands,” You said with a small smile. “Long, soft, almost impossible to hold onto for too long.”
You guided another thick curl through her fingers, watching the strands spill between them like flowing silk.
“And when the sunlight touches it,” You impart quietly, “It catches along the waves in streaks of warm amber and burnished gold, as though pieces of the evening sun became tangled inside it.”
Your gaze softened as you wove her fingers through the curls once more. “Tonight, it falls in deep waves all the way down my back. They twist and wind around each other like a midnight breeze caught in motion.”
A gentle hum settled in your voice as you spoke. “It’s beautifully wild, but it always settles back against my shoulders in the end, waiting for your hands to card through it again.”
You guided her hand lower, letting her fingertips trace the elegant curve of your collarbone before drawing them slowly downward. Her touch ghosted over the softness of your chest, then along the warm plane of your stomach, until finally you settled her palm against the sweeping curve of your waist and hip.
“My body is softer than yours,” You tell her openly, your voice carrying no shame now, only devotion. “Not weak, just different. Warm in places where yours is carved from stone and muscle.”
You pressed her palm more firmly against your hip, letting her feel the seamless transition of your shape beneath her hand.
“My body is an expanse of soft, generous curves because you know how much I love to eat,” You explained with a quiet, playful warmth. “It flows effortlessly from one curve into the next, holding a full, rounded weight that belongs entirely to you.”
Your thumb traces slowly across her knuckles as you guided her touch along the slope of your hips.
“Imagine it like this, baby,” Your voice lowered into something rich and intimate beneath the willow trees. “The curve of my hips is shaped like the gentle incline of a quiet valley at dusk. Soft beneath your hands, but resting firm and certain beside you.”
You held her there for another lingering moment before speaking again.
“Every line of me was shaped by fire,” You revealed quietly, “But not the kind meant to destroy.” Your expression warmed as you were overcome by emotion. “Something steadier than that. A flame that offers warmth instead of ruin. One that only burns brighter whenever you’re near it.”
Toph’s breath shudders completely at the touch, her palm flattening against your skin as if trying to memorize every line of the map you are giving her. Her fingers flexed against the softness of your hip with sudden intensity, grounding herself in the overwhelming realization that you, this breathtaking, living person wrapped in warmth and firelight, belonged entirely to her in this hidden corner of the world.
Her chest rose rapidly as another wave of tears slipped free. The emotional weight of it all had stripped her completely bare. Even now, her hands shook faintly against your body while she fought to steady herself, biting down against her lower lip as though it were the only thing anchoring her to the moment.
And still, she leaned closer.
Now completely defenseless in your embrace and undone by the safety of your body pressed against hers and the impossible depth of love woven through every word you spoke.
You gave her a moment to breathe through it, your thumb brushing slowly across her knuckles while the jasmine of the willow branches wafted in the air. Then, with endless care, you guided her hand lower until her fingers settled around your wrist, where you pressed her thumb gently against a small patch of raised skin there.
“Right here on my wrist is a birthmark,” You stated, guiding her thumb along the delicate edge of the raised skin. “It’s small and uneven in shape, almost like a tiny island drifting alone on a map.”
A faint, nostalgic smile touched your lips. “My mother used to tell me it looked like hidden treasure waiting to be discovered whenever I asked about it as a child.”
You let her continue tracing it as you stared off into the distance, briefly losing yourself for a moment.
“It’s been there since the day I was born.” Your voice lowered slightly. “I usually hide it beneath makeup because I always thought it was ugly.”
The confession settled heavily in the air between you before you curled your fingers around hers.
“But I’m showing it to you now because I want you to know every part of me, baby.” There was this far off tone in your voice. “Even the pieces I still struggle to look at myself and the parts of me I’ve hidden away out of shame.”
Toph freezes at your words, her thumb lingering against the small patch of raised skin as though she could somehow feel every insecurity you had ever poured into it. A quiet breath caught painfully in her throat, the fragile confession settling deep within her chest.
Slowly, she lifted your wrist toward her lips.
Her movements were impossibly careful now, stripped of all her usual roughness, as though she were handling something sacred in her hands. The warmth of her breath fanned across your skin for a brief moment before she pressed the softest kiss directly against the birthmark.
You knew she wasnt doing this out of pity or kindness born from sympathy. Toph loved the way mountains endured storms, without hesitation or fear of the damage it might leave behind. She took this hidden piece of you, buried beneath years of shame and held it with the same reverence one might cradle a dying flame through winter. Beneath her touch, those wounded parts no longer felt ugly or burdensome.
It was as though she had pressed her hands into the deepest soil of your heart and found something living there still.
Toph hovered there for several long seconds, her lips resting against the hidden piece of you the world had never been allowed to touch. The moment felt ancient somehow, sacred in a way words could barely contain. Like the earth itself had shifted softly beneath you, recognizing the quiet miracle of being loved so wholly in the places you had once condemned.
When she finally pulled back, her forehead fell gently against your wrist, her shoulders shaking faintly beneath the gravity of what you were sharing.
“Don’t ever call this ugly again,” She said, her voice hardening with a protective edge. “You hear me? This is part of you. Which means it’s beautiful too.”
“And until you can see that for yourself,” Toph says, her voice faltering with fierce tenderness. “I'll love this part of you enough for the both of us.”
Your eyes slipped closed, an unsteady breath escaping your lips as the unfiltered truth of her words hit you with a force you weren't prepared for. Something that felt alot like sorrow climbed painfully into your throat, you felt the sting of tears threatening to spill over despite your efforts to keep them contained. But you forced it down, tonight was supposed to be entirely about her, about easing the burdens that she carries.
It was just, Toph has always possessed an uncanny ability to reverse the roles between you. No matter the circumstance, she somehow made sure that you felt seen, understood, and protected within the shelter of her love.
Even now, when all you wanted was to pour every ounce of your devotion into her, Toph had unconsciously turned the focus back toward you, prioritizing your heart with the same unyielding care she gave to everything she loved. You've never had a partner quite like her and the fact that she could reach the darkened places others couldn't made you feel deeply cherished, and incredibly whole.
Sucking in a labored breath to quell the fluttering in your chest, you finally lift her hand back up, letting her index finger follow the outline of your lips. You parted them just a fraction beneath her touch, letting her map their shape while you leaned into the heat of her palm.
“They’re soft,” Your lips grazed her fingers as you spoke. “Always a little warmer after kissing you. Tonight, I wore a glassy gloss over them that tastes like the sweet watermelon you always buy me from my favorite stand.”
You gently press her fingertip more firmly against your lower lip, letting her feel the slick texture there. “It almost feels liquid beneath your touch, doesn’t it? Like water reflecting moonlight.”
You smiled faintly at her as you gazed into her clouded eyes. “And I’m sure you can feel the way my lips are curved into a breathless smile. It's an expression meant only for you to feel in this space with me, baby.”
Toph's fingertip rested against the glossy curve of your mouth as though she were trying to memorize the feeling of your smile beneath her skin. The delicate hitch in your breathing did not escape her either. Through the constant pulse vibrating beneath your lips and fingertips, she could feel exactly how deeply her touch affected you too.
Her finger remained on your lower lip, languidly tracing the shape of your happiness as another tear slipped down her cheeks.
“I can feel it,” She voices, sniffling. “I can feel all of it. You’re gorgeous, baby. I love you so much, you have no idea how much this means to me. I would give anything to see your smile right now even if it was just for a moment.”
You gazed at her, your chest aching with an immense, all-encompassing warmth that makes your own eyes blur. Leaning forward, you brushed a kiss against her forehead before resting your brow against hers, allowing Toph to feel the soft rise and fall of your breath mingling with her own.
“You do see me, Toph,” You assure her, your voice unwavering and resolute. “In the only way that will ever matter to me.”
Toph's breath catches, her fingers tightening around your shirt as she pulls herself closer into your lap.
For several heartbeats, she remains entirely still, absorbing the distinct, soothing thump of your heart against her cheek. You watch as a small, watery chuckle breaks through her tears, and she burrows her face right back into your chest, clinging to you as if you were her sole sanctuary in the dark.
“Yeah,” She mutters, her voice thick but returning to that fiercely affectionate tone you love so much. “I guess I do.”
You leaned forward, closing the final distance between you before pressing your lips gently to hers. It was a kiss that held nothing back, a passionate exchange brimming with a love so deep it felt capable of rewriting the very essence of your soul. You poured every ounce of your adoration for Toph into the kiss, hoping that with each slow sweep of your tongue against hers, she could feel the unwavering constancy you knew you would carry for her always.
As the kiss deepened, Toph’s hands rose to the back of your neck, holding you there with quiet desperation. With her head still resting in your lap, the angle allowed you to kiss her more deeply, until the rest of the world seemed to disappear into the space between your breaths.
Her fingers threaded through your hair as she pulled you closer, pouring every fiercely protected fragment of her heart into your mouth. In your embrace, the hard edges she carried so carefully began to melt away, leaving behind the gaurded softness she trusted no one else to hold besides you.
As your lips continued to move with hers, the unwavering certainty of everything Toph had just shared settled deeply in your chest, soothing something profound and broken within you. A choked sob slipped from your throat, muffled softly by her lips as she kissed you more intensely, drinking in every ounce of your emotion without pause.
Toph knew.
She understood exactly what had unraveled inside you, and through the aching press of her lips and the grounded way she held you, she affirmed that she felt it too, that neither of you were alone in this, and somehow, in each others arms, you were going to be okay.
As the kiss gradually softened into something slower and more unhurried, your mouth finally curved into a wide smile. You were so hopelessly in love with this woman that it felt almost unreal. Your heart was unbearably full beneath the protective presence of her touch.
With her lips molded seamlessly to yours, you felt Toph’s mouth mirror your own, her smile soft and luminous in a way that made your heart thrum. She pulled away only a hair, barely sufficient to catch her air, her fingers still quivering faintly as they mapped along the curve of your face.
“See? Right there,” Toph mused, her thumb pressing affectionately into the small indentation beside your mouth. “You’re smiling right now, and your dimple’s there. I can feel it.”
You let out a boisterous laugh, tossing your head at her playful insistence. You tilt forward to press another kiss directly upon her cheek before resting your forehead once more to hers, a genuine solace settling over you.
“Fine, if you’re so sure it’s there, then it’s there.” You leaned into her touch, your teasing tone dropping to a quiet, fierce promise. “As long as you know that every single piece of me belongs to you, Toph.” Your hand rose to cover hers against your cheek. “Dimple and all.”
Toph let out a content sigh at your words. Still faintly glowing from the emotional day she'd had, she eased backward, sliding down until her back rested against the woolen blanket, pulling you down with her in the process.
You lay side by side in the quiet clearing, the echo of your heartfelt promise hanging in the air between you. Your shoulder pressed solidly against hers, your fingers laced securely together while your lips still tingled from the kiss you had just shared.
Toph rolls onto her side, pressing her cheek against your shoulder as she absorbs the cadenced pattern of your breathing.
“You know,” Toph spoke into the darkness, her voice lowering into something quiet and fiercely honest, heavy with years of unspoken longing. “I spent most of my life believing I was destined to be alone.”
A tightness seized her throat, forcing a brief pause before she could find her voice.
“I stood on the sidelines as every single one of my friends fell in love, got married, and built homes and families with the people they loved.” Her voice roughened faintly, cracking under the strain of a lifetime of quiet isolation. “After a while, I just assumed that kind of life belonged to everyone else, while I was meant to stay in the dark.”
Toph squeezes your hand with a sudden, desperate strength, her fingers wrapping around yours tight enough to bruise. She looked so vulnerable as she tried her best to anchor herself to the reality of your presence before the dread and that familiar solitude consumed her whole again.
“I wasn’t even sure what true love was supposed to feel like,” Toph admitted, the words wavering beneath the raw strain of finally exposing something she had buried for years. “Growing up locked away in that estate, hidden like some shameful secret, love always felt like a cage- suffocating, controlling, and completely isolating.”
Toph paused before continuing, and you drew her even closer, molding her frame against yours until she was completely enveloped by your protective embrace.
“It twisted the way I understood affection. Made me believe that being cared for required losing your freedom, and love meant being trapped somewhere dark and impossible to escape.” Toph sucked in a breath as she blinked away tears. “So when Katara used to talk of love- finding someone who makes the world feel lighter, safer, whole. I honestly thought it was just some impossible fairytale meant for other people.”
“I didn’t need my parents to tell me I was difficult to love,” Toph said, the words carrying the shadow of a truth she had known far too young. “I understood that from the second I was old enough to understand words.”
“Whenever I feel control slipping away from me, I build walls so high that nobody can get close enough to hurt me.” Her fingers flexed against yours. “After a while, I stopped believing anyone would care, or fight hard enough to break through all that stone just to reach me.”
“But then you came along,” Toph shifted closer, her voice trembling with an urgency that told you if she didn’t force these words out now, she would regret the silence for the rest of her life- and when it came to you, she refused to risk that.
“And you shattered every rule and expectation I thought the world had set for me.” A tremulous exhale left her. “You didn’t just look past the armor I built around myself. You made me want to tear it down with my own hands.”
“I never thought I’d find a partner like you, baby. Someone who makes me feel this adored and safe.” Emotion thickened her voice until each word sounded painfully sincere. “I love you so much it scares me sometimes, baby. I trust you with every single piece of me I have left that wasnt ruined by my life experiences or the world.”
“And one day, I’m going to marry you.” The words settled between you like an unspoken vow. “I know exactly how rare what we have is and I’m never letting you slip away from me.”
Your heart stops at her declaration, your entire body stilling as tears welled in your eyes now, completely ruining your makeup. Toph, who guards her independence like an absolute fortress, had just offered you her entire future with zero hesitation.
The realization that she is already choosing you for a lifetime causes your throat to tighten with a sudden, joyful ache as the sheer magnitude of her love completely rewires your world. You slide your arm beneath her, cradling her head closer against your chest so she can feel the deep, steady resonance of your voice when you spoke next.
“You were never destined to be alone, Toph,” You answered quietly, your voice filled with absolute conviction and a fierce protectiveness that wrapped itself around every word. “And you were never supposed to spend your life hidden behind walls or treated as something that needed to be tucked away.”
“It breaks my heart to know they ever made you feel difficult to love, because you are the greatest thing that has ever happened to me, baby.” Your heart thudded in your chest as your eyes burned with more tears. “The world just took its time bringing us together because like you said, a love like this, what we have right here is rare. Beautifully rare, and worth every lonely second it took to find.”
Toph buries her tear stained cheeks deep into the crook of your neck.
“You have me now, completely and entirely.” You promised her. “I’d marry you in a heartbeat, baby. I am yours for as long as you’ll have me.”
Her quiet sighs fanned over your bare skin as a tearful laugh escaped her. Her fingers gripped your shirt with a sudden intensity. Toph locked herself in your embrace as a glowing smile completely transformed her features.
You marveled at her in silence, overwhelmed by the breathtaking sight of her vulnerability. It was a beauty untouched by anything superficial, something visceral and enduring that eclipsed every shallow definition the world tried to force upon it.
Pride swelled painfully within your chest. You knew how much courage this had cost her, how terrifying it must have been to dismantle walls she had spent a lifetime building, and you would never take the gift of that trust for granted.
There was something truly sacred about watching her now with that unshielded expression softening her features beneath the sweeping canopy of willow branches. A few wild wisps of her midnight-dark hair caught the evening breeze, lifting like shadows against her skin. You realized right then that Toph Beifong was a masterpiece shaped equally by storm and stillness.
Toph was a woman powerful enough to shake the earth itself, and still she had chosen to soften within the safety of your arms. You made a silent vow to yourself in this darkened corner of the clearing to protect her fiercely and hold every vulnerable part of her soul for as long as she granted you a place by her side.
You tucked a strand of dark hair behind her ear as you took in the beautiful flush spreading across her cheeks beneath the dim glow of the evening sky. You would never tire of seeing her like this, softened by vulnerability and wrapped so openly in your love. It made your own heart thrum in your chest.
Before you could stop yourself, you leaned forward and scattered a flurry of kisses across every inch of her face, each one tender with affection. The quiet clearing soon filled with Toph’s breathless laughter as she squirmed beneath your attention, giggling while she playfully shoved at your shoulders in a half-hearted attempt to make you stop.
“Baby, you keep talking about my smile,” A quiet, lovestruck grin pulled at your mouth. “When honestly, you’re the most beautiful thing in this entire park.”
Toph was caught entirely off guard by the compliment. She shied away from your touch, pulling back just enough to break the direct contact as she tried to salvage what was left of her composure.
“You’re laying on the compliments kinda thick,” Toph cleared her throat, you could see how fast her heart was beating in her chest as she spoke. “If I didn't know any better, I would think you were trying to get into my pants.”
You let out a knowing chuckle, your lips ghosting the shell of her ear as your arms tightened around her waist. Your voice dropped into a smooth, seductive murmur that was warm enough to send heat crawling beneath her skin.
“Well,” You husked softly, punctuating each word with a playful nip against the sensitive spot beneath her ear, “We both know if I really wanted to get into your pants, I wouldn’t need to sweet talk you first.”
Your smile deepened against her skin. “You’d just spread those gorgeous legs for me, wouldn’t you, baby?”
Toph hid her burning face in the crook of your neck, her breaths breaking into shaky, uneven hitches against your skin. You felt her nod quickly against your collarbone. You had rendered her speechless now that your voice had dropped into that devastating tone she could never resist.
“Good girl,” You purred beside her ear, your voice low and delivery, sending a flush of heat directly to her core.
Her reaction did not disappoint, a quiet, helpless moan escaped her lips before she could hide it, the noise dissolving into the stillness of the night as she buried herself further into your neck.
“Baby,” Toph breathed, the word breaking apart into a helpless whimper as her fingers clawed tightly into your shirt, clinging to you with quiet desperation.
“I know.” You cooed as your hands slid lower, mapping the graceful curve of her hip before your fingertips traced slow, deliberate patterns against her skin, each touch drawing another labored breath from her.
“Let’s get you home, sweetheart,” You rasped into her ear. “I wanna take care of you properly.”
Toph didn’t need to be told twice. The charged energy between you shattered instantly as she shot upright so fast she nearly sent you sprawling backward onto the grass.
She immediately began scrambling to gather the abandoned picnic supplies, her movements rushed and completely lacking the usual composure she tried so hard to maintain. The urgency behind every motion revealed just how desperate she was to get you home.
You managed to stare at her for all of two seconds before completely losing it. Bright, helpless laughter burst from your chest, your head tipped back as the sound echoed freely through the secluded clearing.
Across from you, Toph was muttering a heated string of curses under her breath while aggressively trying and failing to force the picnic basket shut after stuffing everything inside with absolutely no organization whatsoever. Causing the basket to sprang back open, the contents nearly spilling out again.
“Spirits,” Toph snapped under her breath, shoving at the lid harder. “Why is this stupid thing fighting me right now?”
“Somewhere urgent you need to be, Chief?” You asked innocently as you rose to your feet beside her.
You reached down to help fold the blanket, your movements intentionally unhurried, giving yourself every excuse to admire the sight in front of you. Heat was practically radiating from Toph’s flushed skin in powerful waves, her cheeks now permanently stained a deep crimson while her hands fumbled helplessly with the basket for what had to be the fifth time
And spirits, she was breathtaking like this. So unraveled beneath your attention, all of her sharp composure and confidence completely stripped away before you had even truly touched her. You bit back another smile as her fingers slipped again, sending a pair of chopsticks clattering noisily back onto the grass.
“Baby,” Toph groaned under her breath, sounding one step away from combusting entirely under your heated gaze alone. “Stop looking at me like that.”
“I dont think I will,” Your voice sinks into a dark, alluring tone as you invaded her space, crowding her with the intensity of your presence.
Your hand slid across her waist before settling possessively over the curve of her hip, drawing her body flush against yours with enough intent to force her breath to hitch in her throat.
“You’re already unraveling for me,” Your lips caressed the skin beside her jaw, your smirk evident in the low vibration of your voice. “And I’ve barely even touched you yet.”
You pressed a slow, deliberate kiss beneath her jaw, savoring the way her intake of air faltered the instant your lips sealed against the sensitive skin there.
“If I slid my hand into your pants right now,” You husked directly to her throat, your voice melting into a sultry hum. “Would I find you already wet for me?”
Your fingers continued their possessive map of her frame, sliding down her sides and spreading across her back until they found the slope of her backside. You palmed the plush curve of her ass, feeling the fullness of it as Toph molded herself into you. Because she stood shorter than you, her head nestled naturally against your chest, which only seemed to amplify the charged energy now that she was locked in your embrace.
“I think I would,” You added, your tone dripping with a smug confidence. “You get so worked up from the smallest things, baby.”
A deep chuckle vibrated in your throat, sending an intentional shiver straight down Toph's spine. “All I have to do is talk to you like this, and you melt for me.”
Toph tenses instantly, her face flushing a deep crimson as your fingers locate the sliver of bare skin where her shirt has ridden up. The moment your fingertips trace that exposed line, her entire body erupts in goosebumps.
Toph bites down hard on her lower lip to smother a rising moan as her entire body burns with an aching need. She pushes back slightly against your chest. She still has a reputation to uphold, and she knows that the longer this continues, the harder it will be for either of you to stop.
“Shut up,” Toph gasps, her voice strained as she shakes her head, trying to find her footing. “Baby, we are out in public! Anyone could walk by and see this.”
Before the conversation can continue, she reaches out and snaps her hand around your wrist. Her grip is firm, leaving no room for argument, as she begins to march away from the clearing, pulling you along with her, you barelt had time to grab your things.
“Since when has that ever stopped you before, Chief?” You counter, allowing yourself to be dragged along just so you could deliberately slow your steps to keep the tension.
Toph swallows thickly, her throat tightening hard as she struggles to maintain her brisk, commanding pace against the sheer weight of her arousal.
“Stop calling me that,” She mutters, her voice dropping into a breathless register that completely betrays her.
“Why?” You grin, your thumb stroking the sensitive skin of her inner wrist. “Is it turning you on, Chief?”
Toph pulls you forward with an urgent, unyielding strength until you finally reach the car. Snapping open the passenger door with her bending, she pauses for a single, breathless second, casting a fierce, burning glare blindly into the darkness where she knew you stood smug.
“You’re impossible,” She huffs, her voice a tight, husky friction before she slides into the seat with a frantic sort of haste, completely silent as she tries to master her own unraveling senses.
As you pulled out of the parking lot and eased onto the quiet road, the low hum of the engine settled warmly through the cabin. Streetlights flickered past the windows in soft golden streaks while the lingering tension from the park still clung thickly to the air between you.
One of your hands remained loose on the steering wheel while the other drifted instinctively onto Toph’s thigh. Your palm sank against the firm muscle above her knee, fingers curling there with slow familiarity as though they belonged nowhere else.
Toph’s entire posture locked instantly, a sharp gasp catching in her throat as her back pressed flush against the passenger seat. She didn’t pull away, but her thighs drew tighter together beneath your hand, the tension in her body almost palpable in the confined space of the car.
While seated at a red light you glanced over. Toph's fingers twisted helplessly into the fabric of her pants while her breathing turned uneven, every slow pass of your palm along her thigh sending another visible shiver through her.
The sight alone nearly ruined your composure. Your thumb dragged lazily over the tense muscle beneath your hand, relishing the way Toph’s lips parted around another strained breath.
“Don't,” She chokes out, though the words lack any real conviction, her voice entirely broken and vibrating with the heat of the moment. “You're going to get us killed out here.”
You only hum, your thumb torturously stroking higher up her leg, feeling the furious, erratic thumping of her pulse vibrating through the seat.
“Just lean back and enjoy the ride, baby.” You instructed, your eyes fixed firmly on the road ahead as you press down on the gas. “We're almost home.”
Working on Adult Toph Modern AU wip. ( I NEED YALL INSIGHTS) Should I remove the cane or no?
Thoughts on giving toph a white cane? I was thinking of doing a modern au Toph but I wanted to represent people with visual impairment too but I don’t really see people portray her with a white cane. I read about how white cane helps blind people navigate independently which suits tophs desire to be free spirited. Despite that I think she would be an athlete, atleast a Paralympic one which suits the background of her character that her parents held her back due to being blind despite being well skilled in her talents and sports. Visual impairment also comes in a spectrum, some have 10% vision still intact some have like 40% so theres a chance she could slightly use sight in sports too.
A friend of mine argued that she is too cool to use a white cane but honestly daredevil also uses a white cane despite having heightened senses too (I mean its used more to signal hes blind he doesn’t really need it) . I was thinking more on accurate representation in a real life scenario while also retaining the essence and strength of Tophs character.
Since atla is heavily inspired on martial arts I thought wrestling (the grappling type) would suit Toph since it heavily relied on close physical proximity. I watched a short documentary on a blind Paralympic that did wrestling and that was their perspective on doing wrestling since it relied more on physical senses which is perfect for Toph ( mimicking the seismic sense in a modern realistic time). Toph gives me pitfighter vibes and it suits her first arc where aang met her in an earth bending tournament HAHAHAH.
I’d appreciate some insights and ideas regarding this since I do want to be open to the other variables I might miss with people with disabilities.
And also ideas on modern au gaang >0< give me headcanons
Or yk what Ill just give her a damn service dog since its badass
Unfortunately, his physically. Fortunately, yours mentally (Part 1).
Slightly inspired by “Promise” - Laufey.
“It hurts to be something, It’s worse to be nothing with you.”
Yearner!Adult!Toph x Princess!F!Reader
Content: SFW/Implied NSFW, Fluff, heavy angst, hurt/comfort, light swearing, may contain grammatical errors, Not proofread, implied emotional self-harm, lore inaccuracies, slight TLOK spoilers, and etc.
Sypnosis: Being the princess of the Northern Water Tribe already gave you too much stress, but now you were expected to marry a guy you met thrice in your entire life? Now that was new. Running away probably wasn’t the best decision, but you weren’t completely helpless when Aang and Katara found you and decided you’d be in Toph’s supervision for the meantime.
a/n: been sitting in my drafts for a whole month so nobody better attack me on how bunssss it is😢 was gonna be a oneshot since this is my first fanfic but it would take me years to finish so im posting it in parts. HOPE U LIKE IT
❥ Ever since your older sister, Princess Yue, became the Moon Spirit, your father, Chief Arnook, decided that your wedding would happen when you're 21, becoming extremely overprotective of his last daughter, not wanting you to end up like Yue. He was determined to spend more time with you before you were required to be married to your arranged husband, Siku. You’ve asked him multiple times to let you choose your own partner, but he was convinced that it would be too “careless” and “dangerous” to let you choose God knows who.
❥ The day of your 21st birthday finally came. You were nervous, but it wasn't as extreme as the terrified pounding in your heart. It was as if your heart was ready to jump out of your body and eat you alive. It was then that you realized you weren't ready at all.
You were already engaged to Siku since you were 16. Sure, he was a decent guy; handsome, rich, intelligent, but you wouldn't really say so on the nice side. You've seen him yell at people for no reason and you for sure didn't wanna be tied down to someone who lacks human decency for the rest of your life. So, you did what you had to do.
❥ On the night of your birthday, you decided to run away. While Katara, Aang, and Sokka were on their way to celebrate your birthday, Sokka spotted you crossing one of the ice bridges wearing a dark cloak. They then decided to land Appa to see what was happening. You told them how you felt about this marriage, how unsure you are about marrying someone you barely knew. They ultimately agreed to bring you along to Republic City.
❥ This was definitely the first time you went to Republic City, though you've only ever been to the Southern Water Tribe. Aang chose to leave you in Toph's supervision for now. They dropped you off at her Metalbending Academy.
You were aware of who Toph Beifong was, who wasn't? She was one of the best Earthbenders ever. So, when Katara said that you'd be dropped off at Toph's place, you were extremely surprised and even more nervous. You? Meeting the Toph Beifong? It felt like you were on cloud 9. You've always admired how carefree and confident Toph was; she was the complete opposite of you, constantly being told what to do and what not to do. You sometimes wished you could live a life like hers someday.
❥ When you arrived at Toph's Metalbending Academy, it was pretty dark, but you could see that the academy was quite big, and in the middle of the training ground, Toph was there. When Appa landed safely, you started admiring the view around you, but your thoughts drifted elsewhere. You couldn't help but feel a pang of guilt after leaving your father behind, but you knew it was the right decision.
❥ Toph was skeptical of you at first, thinking that you were another spoiled brat who didn't know any better, but when Katara explained your situation, Toph let her guard down just a bit.
"Seriously? Now you're letting me babysit some princess?"
Toph says, with a slight scoff, "There was no real bite to it, but you could tell she was slightly irritated."
"She just needs a few days to stay, Toph. Just let her stay here for a few months until we can find her a permanent place."
Katara says in a soft yet understanding voice as she gets off Appa.
Toph stays silent for a bit before responding,
"Fine. I could use a little help with the chores here anyway."
She says before looking at you with her milky eyes,
"Alright, princess. Follow me."
You follow her instantly, not wanting to make her any more irritated. Though you found her attitude quite irritating.
❥ It’s been a month since you moved in with Toph in the academy. It was actually pretty easy to get along with Toph, just don’t do things that could potentially piss her off, but other than that she’s pretty fun to hang out with.
You’ve recently started training Waterbending with Katara since you barely knew how to defend yourself. After the lessons, surprisingly, Toph agreed to spar with you and would even leave snarky comments if you ever missed her by just a few inches. Toph can sometimes be hard-headed, but you were still thankful that she took you in knowing that she could’ve left you in the streets.
Toph didn't really have an issue with you whatsoever. Though, she couldn't figure out why she instantly felt a strange connection with you, knowing you’ve only been here a few weeks. Maybe it was when she’d ask you a question and you’d answer truthfully every time, not that you’d have anything to gain by lying in the first place. She trusted you enough to give you a nickname, Pebbles. Sure, it wasn't really original since she used it years ago, but it fit you too well.
❥ You were sitting at the front steps of the academy, observing Toph spar with her students as she destroyed them one by one. You look up at the sky realizing it was almost sunset, and you call over Toph to tell her it was time to go on a journey to the market. This was one of your daily routines with Toph.
“Seriously? It's that time already?”
Toph absolutely despises going to the market since she thinks it's “boring”, but hey, you make it a lot less boring.
You take her to the market to buy ingredients for your dinner tonight. You needed one more item to complete your dinner, so, you approached one of the stalls that sold tomatoes. The vendor noticed you were heading to his stall and quickly hid the wooden sign that said “2 Yuan”
“Excuse me Sir, how much are the tomatoes?”
You asked politely, picking up one of the tomatoes to check its quality.
“Hmm.. Normally they would be 7 yuan since these are beautifully harvested, but for you, I’ll make it 5 yuan.”
The strange vendor says with a smug grin playing on his face, obviously trying to squeeze you for some more money.
“You’re lying. You’re a terrible liar, I can practically feel you shaking on the ground.”
Toph retorted to the vendor. You knew she hated liars and this guy was especially bad at it.
The vendor laughs nervously before responding.
“Uhh.. Actually, the prices just went down to 2 Yuan! What a coincidence!”
You couldn't help but chuckle a bit at the obvious lie, but then you noticed it's almost getting dark. You quickly purchased 2 tomatoes and headed back to the academy.
❥ After finishing both your meals, you both got ready for bed. You were in Toph’s room, brushing out her long jet-black hair.
“Is this really necessary? My hair doesn't need all this caring y’know.”
She said with an irritated pout on her lips. She was extremely impatient when it came to taking care of herself, frankly, she never even really thought about how she looked until you came along.
“Of course it does! Just cause you’re blind doesn't make your appearance any less important.”
You responded teasingly. It wasn’t a lie though, Toph was indeed beautiful, and you knew she could tell you weren't lying.
Toph lets out a loud yawn before responding.
“Must be true then. Fine, I’ll let you brush my hair just for a little longer.”
She liked it when you complimented her looks, not that she really cared about it. Though, it did make her want to put more care into her appearance.
You noticed her obnoxiously loud yawn and chuckled a bit.
“You seem tired. Don’t worry, I’ll wrap this soon. You need your rest to y’know.”
“I know I do, but that yawn was nothing. I yawn all the time! It’s not anything outta the ordinary, you’re thinking too much. Just.. Keep going until I say so, got that?”
Toph leaned her head closer to you, insisting that you continue.
You laughed loudly, before going on with whatever you were doing.
❥ You’ve met Toph for nearly a year now. Not much has changed, but it was obvious that you both grew a lot closer.
You’ve just completed your lessons with Katara. Now, it was your turn to demonstrate what you had learned to Toph. However, you always got the feeling that this was her way of trying to kill you, she always showed no mercy on you! Though, you can’t deny that she helped you improve by a lot.
When Toph reached the training grounds, she smirked, looking at you mockingly,
“Ready to train hard today, Pebbles? Let’s see if you can land a hit on me this time.”
Unfortunately for you, you were once again defeated. Though, you did manage to leave a slight bruise on her shoulder earlier, which boosted your ego by just a bit.
Now, you’ve known you had feelings for Toph, for a few months now actually. Sure, she was sometimes annoying, but she showed you that home can be in the form of a person. She was someone you adored deeply. You’ve thought about telling her your growing love for her, but each time you tried, you swore you could’ve peed your pants out of sheer nervousness.
It wasn’t that you were afraid of rejection, you could take that easily. You figured that since you were already engaged with Siku, the chance of you two getting together was extremely low. You knew that you’d never end up together, and that was fine. As long as it meant you’d spend most of your days with Toph, it was a better outcome than any confession could give.
❥ It was already quite dark, and you both were in Toph’s room. You were attempting to heal the bruise you accidentally caused during training after she complained that it “hurt badly.” You didn't believe her, but you didn't say anything.
Toph would never admit it, but she appreciated it when you took care of her, brushing her hair or healing her bruises after training, as you’re doing now. She cherished the time she got to spend with you since she barely got to. She liked the thought of having someone trustworthy enough that she could share quiet moments with.
Toph suddenly yelped in discomfort before scolding me.
“Ow! Can’t you go any slower, Pebbles?!”
“I- Excuse you?! I’m trying, but your hand won't stay still. I can practically feel your nervousness from here.”
You shot back at her with a light pout on your face. It was pretty normal for you guys to argue over small stuff. Somehow, you were always the one to start it.
You weren’t really wrong about her nervousness either. She was tense, but for a totally different reason. The real reason was how close you were to her, and she could practically feel your breath on her neck.
Toph coughs a bit to break the awkwardness before asking a question.
“Are you really not going to go back and marry that prick? I know I know, should’ve asked this a long time ago, but I can’t help asking.”
She asked as if she wanted to hear the answer she wished for.
You thought about it for a minute before answering.
“Definitely not! He’s too cocky and bossy, I can't stand guys like him.”
You declared mockingly.
“Sounds like an awful lot like me.. Is this your way of saying you secretly dislike me?”
Toph says mockingly, she didn't mean it, of course, but it would feel good to hear some reassurance.
You chuckled a bit as you finished healing her bruise.
“Hey, even if you are sometimes annoying, you’re actually fun to have around. You guys aren’t alike at all!”
You retorted back before dropping the water on top of Toph’s head, causing her to be soaking wet.
It was almost midnight so you ultimately decided to head back to your room. You stood up, but before you could even begin to move, Toph grabbed your hand tightly.
“You aren’t going anywhere, you're staying with me tonight.”
She said as she pulled you back down beside her.
“What? I haven’t even agreed to it yet..”
“Well, were you gonna say no?”
She waited for your answer, though she already knew what it was.
“I was seriously considering it, but I guess saying no to you isn’t an option..”
❥ Toph could barely sleep that night. Her thoughts were filled with you and she couldn’t explain why. She started overthinking, what if you returned to the North Pole? What if you chose that man over her? She felt like a mess, she couldn't keep hiding it forever.
Toph never told anyone about her growing feelings for you, she always assumed that it was because you were the only person that she could easily spend time with. Unlike Katara and the rest of the Gaang, they were pretty busy with work. You were really the only person who was around 24/7, and honestly, she would’ve never chosen anyone else to spend her days with.
She loved you, more than words could express. So, she showed it through her actions, always helping you out with chores, complimenting your cooking, and even spending quiet nights like this with you. Hell, if she were given the chance to marry you, she’d accept it in a heartbeat.
She planned on telling you, she really did, but she knew that it wouldn't work out. She figured that since you were already engaged to Siku, you two could never be together.
Maybe getting some rest would relax her a tad bit, she thought, but remembering the betrothal necklace you mentioned to her kept the nightmares lingering. She knew she had to tell you soon, she just had to wait for the perfect time. She was willing to do anything at all to keep you by her side.
❥ One morning, Aang and Katara arrived at the academy urgently. You saw them land Appa at the training ground and Katara rushing down to hand you what looked like a letter. You and Toph rushed outside to check what was going on.
Katara handed you a letter with a concerned look,
“Your dad sent us a letter, he knows you’re staying with Toph and needs you to return to the North Pole.”
“…Did he say why? There has to be a reason. He wouldn’t just send a letter for no reason.”
You urgently opened the letter, reading it thoroughly; your face turning pale as you continued to go over each word.
“The North Pole’s running out of resources, Siku’s parents can help but in return, I’d need to agree to the wedding.”
You paused for a long moment before ultimately deciding on your final decision.
“Tell my dad I’ll be back home by next week.”
You stated sternly, leaving no room for argument. They knew this wasn’t your decision, it was your father’s.
“Are you sure? The second I-“
“Yes, I’m sure.”
You cut Katara off harshly.
Meanwhile, Toph felt her heart drop. Her eyes shot wide open as she let your words sink in; there's no way you’d actually leave her, right? That’s what Toph wanted to think, at least. She knew you were sincere the entire time, but this was the first time she wished she was wrong.
❥ That evening, you were once again in Toph’s room, gently brushing out her hair before heading to bed. You both stayed silent the entire day, neither of you attempting to break the silence. That is, until Toph decided to.
“You’re not changing your mind... are you?"
She questioned, her voice unusually reserved.
“Even if I wanted to, I... I just can’t..”
You paused for a bit, letting your fingers run through her hair.
Toph turned to face you, her face filled with frustration as you met her cloudy eyes. You felt her fingers tracing your jaw before her thumb traced your lips. She leans in closer, her lips brushing against yours lightly. She slowly closed the gap between you before finally pressing her lips against yours ever so gently.
Your breath hitched slightly, but instead of pulling away, you cupped her cheek and kissed her back tenderly as you felt her arm slowly wrap around your waist. You both stayed in that position for a while, that was until you felt her tears trickle down your knuckles. You decided to pull away to brush away her tears, but it was no use. Before you could say anything else, Toph broke down in tears, letting out a loud sob, and you knew exactly why.
You both knew you loved each other, yet neither of you wanted to admit it. You both knew that no matter how strong your feelings were, you were destined to be with another man. So you both pretended that being friends was something you were both content with, but you knew it wasn’t. Now, all that hiding caused her to fall apart. She was tired of pretending that she didn’t want you, tired of pretending that the thought of you marrying someone else didn't destroy her.
Toph buried her face in your shoulder, her breath quickly coming out in hitched gasps.
“Don’t l-leave me... Please.. Fuck. I.. I love you...”
She pleaded, her voice shaky and quiet.
You cupped her cheeks, placing a quick kiss on top of her head before responding.
“I won’t. I promise.”
That moment alone nearly made you rethink your decision.
❥ You spent the night making love with Toph, even though you knew you shouldn't. You knew this was wrong, and she did too, but neither of you cared. Toph was someone important to you, and every second needed to be spent with her. You knew you’d eventually have to let her go, but the very idea of it nearly ends you right on the spot.
Toph on the other hand knew your promise was nothing but a hoax to keep her grounded, but to her, it felt real enough for her to keep believing that you’d stay with her. To her, that night was hell and heaven in one.
