ERE: BEFORE

i am not the only traveler who has not repaid his debt

[ereknight]

hello  there!  you  can  call  me  paris, i'm 26,  and  i’m  in  the  pacific  timezone.   i’m  a  full - time  student  working  towards  my  ba  and have a job so  my  activity  will  be  fairly  sporadic.

you  can  read  my  rules  and  muses  over  on  my  carrd  (here!)

my interest checker is here. please fill it out!

i don’t want anyone who rps/supports these things following me:

a.ttack  on  t.itan,  h.etalia,  k.illing  s.talking,  anything  from  jk  rowling’s  writings.

shouldn’t have to be said but i don’t tolerate bigotry of any sort.

Free Palestine. Donate for relief with UNRWA.

[ereknight]

[quantumphoenixblue]

Meeting on the Tower Stairs

aka Meeting on the Turret Stairs but make it O14

[ereknight]

Arvin & Haldrath. ===============================================

I do think Arvin idolizes his relationship with Haldrath and also I think the reality is that it wasn't all that healthy. Arvin was so far beneath him class-wise, and thought they were equals, but Haldrath did not.

Arvin was so caught up in this image Haldrath painted of himself, and he adored the attention he would get for his Heroics but never really grasped that he was like a jester to him. Because Arvin is kind of naive in his earnestness. He's earnest so clearly everyone else must be.

Don't get me wrong though, I do think Haldrath did have a soft spot for him obviously and enjoyed his time with him but it was Never going to be on equal footing. That Haldrath did not go searching for him after the betrayal of Ratatoskr as well? He cared, but not in the way Arvin believed he did.

This reflects also in the way Arvin talked about his previous relations with other nobility in that they thought he was fun and good entertainment and he isn't even self aware of how that comes off. The fact Arvin wasn't of the 12 knights should alone be enough evidence of where he actually was socially. His armor was a gift from Embla. His spear a gift from Haldrath. These were very much not family heirlooms. He was most certainly not very far up in the social sphere. He was a lowly dragoon captain in a see of other captains.

And it's almost like…. would it be Worth letting him know? Because that reality could shatter him pretty bad. And besides, the past is so very far away, letting him know would hurt him far more than it would help him.

[uniiicornsources-old]

Send 🍁 + any question you've been curious to know about my muse

Could be absolutely anything. Don’t be shy!

[ereknight]

raises my hand. would anyone like to hear about ansgar. my pookie.

[ereknight]

well. i like him.

[ereknight]

raises my hand. would anyone like to hear about ansgar. my pookie.

[uniiicornsources-old]

Send 🍁 + any question you've been curious to know about my muse

Could be absolutely anything. Don’t be shy!

[nanzznanzz]

I am NOT!! normal abt him.

[ereknight]

oh yeah uhhhh i never stated it in my rules but i keep up to date with ffxiv's main scenario. i will not tag spoilers for previous campaigns but will tag spoilers for the current campaign. (as of this moment that being dawntrail)

[ereknight]

i have a lot of complicated thoughts surrounding the gender & sexuality of many of the characters i write because i'm a historian and these are things i've studied in detail (especially medieval gender & sexuality)

needless to say a great many of them would not identify with any of the verbiage we use today. however i do use it as a shorthand. aymeric and cecil in particular reflect these thoughts. the best description for both aymeric and cecil would be gay man but it's a little beyond this. they both Are and Are Not.

[ereknight]

do Not get me started on the queer history of the knights of the round table.

[ereknight]

i have a lot of complicated thoughts surrounding the gender & sexuality of many of the characters i write because i'm a historian and these are things i've studied in detail (especially medieval gender & sexuality)

needless to say a great many of them would not identify with any of the verbiage we use today. however i do use it as a shorthand. aymeric and cecil in particular reflect these thoughts. the best description for both aymeric and cecil would be gay man but it's a little beyond this. they both Are and Are Not.

[ereknight]

you will listen to arvin's voice claim Now

[thesean]

there's a lot of gay coding going on between aymeric and estinien, especially within the context of them being knights + nobility. there's an Insane amount of medieval romance tropes happening to them but it's just so subtle from a modern lens it'd be easy to miss. it makes me incredibly ill.

was it on purpose? i don't know. i just know Its There and im Not insane.

like, okay, listen.

+ the addition of the fact that you, as the wol, never learn estinien's past directly from him, in fact if you don't do the dragoon job quests, the only way you learn about it is via aymeric, who speaks of the matter in a way one would who was told directly by that person

what more is that — yes, i'm aware of ffxiv's tendency of avoiding romances of any sort all together, but they were never afraid to show, for example, thancred's philandering. nor are they scared of making a character's interest in the opposite gender explicit. with that said;

the thing that really sticks out in my reading of aymeric de borel being a closeted gay man is that he is Super popular among the ladies. he could genuinely have any pick of them. BUT that man is 32 and unmarried in a society where carrying on the family name is paramount. especially when he's the last of his line.

is aymeric and estinien's position in romances up in the air specifically to give room for people to play dolls? maybe. but from a strictly canon lens, we know aymeric's friends and acquaintances who have known him for far longer than the wol, and in every instance we know - both from aymeric and estinien - that estinien is aymeric's closest and — his own words — dearest friend.

don't even get me started on aymeric's dragoon-shaped ear cuff (!) that matches estinien's drachen textures

that his relationship with another man is so vital to his character and vice versa really bespeaks a level of closeness no other character can achieve.

all this to say — they share in each other a typical medieval romance which is hidden in the subtext of their friendship. and i think that's awesome especially when it's between two men. those knights are gay and in love to me.

[vierandancer]

I wouldnae consider Ishgard a summer anythin', Meiko thought, but she decided to keep that to herself.

"Aye. I heard o'what ye went through," Briefly, at least, from Tataru. "How, uh... how are ye holdin' up w' all that?"

It was an unavoidably awkward question. Still, if she were in his place, she would probably appreciate anyone offering an ear. Maybe.

"Does bein' away from there...help?"

[ereknight]

   Ah... so his tale has been told. Admittedly, Arvin tries to keep most of the details to himself. 'Tis difficult to explain, as well as understand, all things considered. Most of this world as it is is well beyond his ken and being so mystified by what others consider simple is...    Well... 'tis rather embarrassing.

   Nonetheless, Arvin's smile turns sad at the question, and he glances down and off to the side. ❝ It can... Though, admittedly I do not consider the Ishgard of now as the Ishgard I hail. ❞

   He considers his words once more, ❝ The Ishgard you are most familiar with was not even the capitol from mine own time. 'Twas a castle at best, meant as means of keeping the Coerthan border from besiegement. I had only been stationed there twice afore, and 'twas certainly no home of culture. ❞

[fvneralpyred]

Something blooms upon her face. It isn't abject fury, not indignation, nor the virulent rage that was present moments before. The rancor had passed. What was left was jubilation ( and a bit of surprise at the absolute audacity Elidibus had to do something so ballsy ) and she could only stare with a slack-jawed smile.

He didn't know. He doesn't know we're rejoined. He doesn't know about yer presence in m'mind, yer simulacrum, or Eden, or jack SHIT! She could only laugh at the absurdity of it all. "Gods, yer terrible at this. Fuckin'--I gotta applaud you, really, fer thinkin' you'd bait me int' whatever y'wanted that way. It jus' showed me how little y'know, or at least, how unseriously yer takin' yer 'duty.'"

She steps close. It was her turn to twist the knife, lips pulling into a sneer, "Yer a bad actor an' the worst godsdamned emissary I've ever met. Any good one would have studied whom he wished t', what, 'connect' with? Bare minimum with you. An' you've done seven Rejoinin's like this?" She pouts and cocks her head with a furrowed brow, mockingly, channeling all the ways Hades had pissed her off in the past just to throw it in Elidibus' face in a cruel mirror. "I almost pity you. Almost... but not really."

[ereknight]

   The emptiness in Ardbert— nay, Elidibus's eyes tell all. The frown that briefly crosses his stolen lips, however, speak of something more. He does not like being laughed at. He has work to do. He owes it to... He owes it... Who does he owe it to? What does he owe this to? Why? The panicked uncertainty fades and in its place a certainty. All cry out for his salvation. They do. They must. He must.

   Something greater still rouses in the depths of his empty, hollowed heart. It stirs on the moon rumbling low, moaning like a dove for its lost heart. It's all just noise. Noise he intends to excise. He must. (That incessant thought, not entirely his own, but never recognized as foreign.)

   ❝ I do not desire your pity, nor is it necessary. I seek not connection, for it is an obstacle to my purpose at present. ❞ Elidibus is built upon contradictions, were a single thread pulled at he would all but unravel. Another blind spot in something incomprehensibly old. ❝ Do you not find it burdensome? Being so entrenched in death as you are? ❞

[ereknight]

posting all those replies in queue but then getting impatient about them posting.... closes my eyes.