Erestor Googles

Chief Counsellor of Elrond's household (Follows from @sabriel, I also run Taurielgoogles)  

[haldirgooglesdeactivate]

How does @erestorgoogles deal with mortals being in his lands all the time

How to get a group of dirty people to leave your forest

[erestorgoogles]

*sighs deeply* I have had no choice but to get used to it, while Imladris is indeed my home it is beyond my control who Lord Elrond allows to enter the valley 

I mostly keep to my study when mortals are present unless my presence is required for meetings and such 

I have no definite solution to your plight Haldir, perhaps assisting them with whatever purpose they have which led them to your borders will at least allow you to get them on their way out of Lothlorien   

[gotouda]

orcs are sexy, big and theyll hold me through the night. elves are selfish materialistic twinks who eat dirt.

[glorfindelgooglesdeactivated]

@erestorgoogles

[erestorgoogles]

The person behind this must have the brain capacity of an orc themselves to write such nonsense 

[glorfindelgooglesdeactivated]

Orcs will not hold you through the night, they’ll murder you in your sleep. I think orcs and dwarves both eat dirt.

[erestorgoogles]

Agreed and since elves are immortal while orcs and dwarves are not it stands to reason that elves are superior due to being able to hold you every night indefinitely   

[glorfindelgooglesdeactivated]

and elves are sexy. We have way better hair than orcs or dwarves. 

[erestorgoogles]

Dwarves haircare is certainly lacking, the erebor dwarves that accompanied gandalf that time looked as if they were encouraging birds to nest in their hair due to it being all matted. And Orc hair *shudders*, truly disgusting     

[glorfindelgooglesdeactivated]

I think one of them did actually have vermin in their hair. 

dont get me started on orc hair. 

[erestorgoogles]

And Elrond let them enter Imladris?! *Shakes head* 

Yes lets not  

[glorfindelgooglesdeactivated]

The dwarves were fun, just needed to bathe. 

[erestorgoogles]

In the fountain!!??! *very offended*

[glorfindelgooglesdeactivated]

….

I definitely didn’t tell them thats where we bathe.

[erestorgoogles]

Glorfindel!!!

[haldirgooglesdeactivate]

Dear @erestorgoogles

I appreciate the continued goodwill between our two realms. That said, I would be appreciative if you took Aragorn back, and maybe took him to a doctor as he has cried twice today and it is making the galadhrim uncomfortable. Also please take the 25 pounds of lembas we are sending with him. 

Is it normal for mortals to cry this much? 

Signed, 

Haldir. 

[aragorngoogles]

To Whom it May Concern,

Today, well, today marks a tragic event in time: the gruesome and painful death of the friendship between Aragorn son of Arathorn, King of Gondor, and Haldir the Elf. After much mistreatment of the King (on the Elf’s end, ofc), he subsequently, and rightly, decided to cut off all ties, crying displaying an emotion rendered appropriate to the situation and admitting that he had, in fact been hurt by someone, well, by someone he had trusted. Today marks a tragedy, a betrayal. Today marks the end of something that had once been fruitful and amazing, but, due to indiscretions displayed by one member of the party, turned into a dark and barren relationship. There will be a period of one (1) week in which to mourn. We thank those invested and offer our condolences.

Signed,

Aragorn.

[haldirgooglesdeactivate]

Aragorn, 

Firstly, this letter was not intended for you and it is rude to read and open someone mail.

Secondly, I am mildly offended that I was referred to as Haldir the elf, instead of Haldir the march-warden, but I will get over it, as I am an adult who is in control of my emotions. 

And you had not been hurt by anyone, you were simply not fed lembas. I’m not sure why this is an issue, you are married to an elf and you can make yourself lembas anytime you want. 

Pull your life together Aragorn, and share your lembas with the children. 

Signed, 

Haldir

[aragorngoogles]

Haldir the Elf,

If you did not wish for me to read the letter, you should not have written in on the backside a postcard, and maybe, instead, picked some stationery, stationery, shall we say, better suited to the subject matter. Furthermore, I would like to point out that you have terrible taste in postcards. Out of all of the ones you could have selected, a ¨Don’t wish you were here! You’re lothlori-lame!¨ postcard is hardly the best choice for inter-elven relations, or even just in general. Should have been burned. Not angry, just dissapointed.

Furthermore, I hardly think you are in control of your emotions as you are being, how do the kids say it…embarrassingly lame salty?

The children can have some lembas, of course, I’m, like, super generous I know, but your motion to take all of my lembas away from me really shows me your true colors. Hurt.

It is astonishing to me that you think Arwen hasn’t left me yet,,

Yours,

Aragorn.

[haldirgooglesdeactivate]

Aragorn the Mortal, 

It is still rude to read someones mail especially when it is not addressed to you. That postcard is brilliant. It was addressed to my friend, Erestor, which is why I didn’t use some fancy stationary. also the mirkwood elves stole all the good stationary as a joke.  

It doesn’t count as an emotion if it is just your general personality. I also do not think that you have room to speak about embarrassingly lame. 

Aragorn, I was not trying to take away all of your lembas,  I was trying to share the lembas, as eating as much lembas as you did is not healthy. 

Did Arwen leave? is this where this is coming from?

Signed, 

Haldir

[aragorngoogles]

Haldy Baldy,

How dare you address me as ‘mortal’. I am a King, and you are hereby banned from my kingdom get REKT.

Remind me to Google if being emotional is a bad thing. Just because you are incapable of feeling doesn’t mean that that is, indeed, a good thing. I’m sympathetic, passionate, even amazing, if you decide venture that far into my many amicable qualities. I, in fact, do not think you have any room to think I am embarrassingly lame, as I can actually rock a man bun whereas you, in fact, just can’t. You are stuck with the half-up. Lame.

If you were not trying to take away my lembas, why, esteemed colleague, did you write Erestor asking for him to take away my lembas? I do not understand why you think this is unhealthy, as I’ve lived this long. 

How long did you think Arwen could actually put up with me? I expected this. We all expected this. 

Signed,

King Aragorn

[haldirgooglesdeactivate]

Aragorn the Mortal, 

You are a mortal just like I’m an elf. And if I’m banned from Gondor, then you are banned from Lothlorien where all of the good lembas is made. 

I am offended that you think I am unfeeling. I have at least three feelings. Sometimes as many as four. Being emotional isn’t a bad thing, crying twice in one day over lembas availability is. If you had any taste, you’d know that the half up style is fair better than the man bun, as the half up hairstyle shows both the shine and sexiness of the hair but is also functional. 

It isnt your lembas. Did you make the lembas? no? then it is not yours. I have lived far longer than you, so I think I know about the nutritional qualities of lembas. 

Is the crying about lembas because Arwen left you?

Signed

Haldir, the march-warden of the galadhrim

[erestorgoogles]

To @haldirgoogles March-warden of Lothlorien 

Thank you for bring the situation with Estel to my attention, I will have people sent at once to Lothlorien to bring him back to Imladris when he can recover from overconsumption of Lembas. Do contact me If your lady requires compensation for the trouble he’s caused. 

I shall deal with the excess Lembas in an appropriate manner, some shall be sent to the city of Dale and the Woodland Realm have requested for some to help with Thranduil's malnutrition due to his drinking.

To answer your question on the norm for mortals and crying: Estel has always been peculiar  

Signed 

Erestor, Chief Counsellor of Imladris 

To @aragorngoogles

Estel I am very disappointed in you. You were taught better by not just myself but Lord Elrond as well as others in Imladris and to think that this is all the years we dedicated to you amount to is very disheartening.

As a mortal you simply do not need the quantity of Lembas that you were consuming and to then get emotional about the perceived stealing on your part, where we were doing what was best for you, makes me question your suitability to be king of gondor which I will be discussing with Lord Elrond.

Signed 

Erestor       

[ewoksarecute-deactivated2024072]

for alessandra because this pretty much sums up her personality.

[glorfindelgooglesdeactivated]

@erestorgoogles

[erestorgoogles]

What are you implying Glorfindel? 

[glorfindelgooglesdeactivated]

I thought it was pretty self explanatory Erestor. 

[erestorgoogles]

*scowls* I do not as you said “talk shit”  

[glorfindelgooglesdeactivated]

You do too.

All the time.

[erestorgoogles]

Oh? Give me an example 

[glorfindelgooglesdeactivated]

Just now. 

Literally any time I have said anything. 

[erestorgoogles]

Doesn’t that say more about you than I?  

I haven’t had any complaints from others about what i say 

[glorfindelgooglesdeactivated]

Thats cause you only talk to elves that are as boring as you. 

[erestorgoogles]

I think you meant to say as interesting as I 

[gotouda]

orcs are sexy, big and theyll hold me through the night. elves are selfish materialistic twinks who eat dirt.

[glorfindelgooglesdeactivated]

@erestorgoogles

[erestorgoogles]

The person behind this must have the brain capacity of an orc themselves to write such nonsense 

[glorfindelgooglesdeactivated]

Orcs will not hold you through the night, they’ll murder you in your sleep. I think orcs and dwarves both eat dirt.

[erestorgoogles]

Agreed and since elves are immortal while orcs and dwarves are not it stands to reason that elves are superior due to being able to hold you every night indefinitely   

[glorfindelgooglesdeactivated]

and elves are sexy. We have way better hair than orcs or dwarves. 

[erestorgoogles]

Dwarves haircare is certainly lacking, the erebor dwarves that accompanied gandalf that time looked as if they were encouraging birds to nest in their hair due to it being all matted. And Orc hair *shudders*, truly disgusting     

[glorfindelgooglesdeactivated]

I think one of them did actually have vermin in their hair. 

dont get me started on orc hair. 

[erestorgoogles]

And Elrond let them enter Imladris?! *Shakes head* 

Yes lets not  

[glorfindelgooglesdeactivated]

The dwarves were fun, just needed to bathe. 

[erestorgoogles]

In the fountain!!??! *very offended*

[lady-byleth]

Glorfindel Headcanon

He makes jokes about his death ALL THE FUCKING TIME

“I DIDN’T DIE FOR THIS???”

“Death was easier to bear than this shit”

“How do we get out of this?” “Have you tried dying?”

“If I hadn’t died you wouldn’t even be alive today, Elrond!” “Glorfindel pls” “I DIED FOR YOU, ELROND *fake crying*”

Idk he just seems like a little shit to me

[erestorgoogles]

Glorfindel please stop doing this, it does upset people  

[glorfindelgooglesdeactivated]

I will not stop. 

I didnt die for this Erestor. 

[erestorgoogles]

*sighs* Then at least take care who you say these thing around. I for one am not bothered by it but some of the more sensitive elves have been known to cry 

[glorfindelgooglesdeactivated]

Look, its a character building experience.

That one potential guard who cried that one time was a sissy. If he wanted to be a guard he shouldn’t have cried the first time the captain of the guard messed with him.  

[erestorgoogles]

I wasn’t aware of the guard but I did observe one of the elves who tends to the gardens become visibly upset after you said one of your jokes to the captain.

It might not be the kind of character building experience that suits everyone, just a suggestion that’s all  

[glorfindelgooglesdeactivated]

-visibly taken a back-

I was not aware anyone in the garden heard me. I shall apologize to all of the garderners at once. 

[erestorgoogles]

I think that they will appreciate that 

[gotouda]

orcs are sexy, big and theyll hold me through the night. elves are selfish materialistic twinks who eat dirt.

[glorfindelgooglesdeactivated]

@erestorgoogles

[erestorgoogles]

The person behind this must have the brain capacity of an orc themselves to write such nonsense 

[glorfindelgooglesdeactivated]

Orcs will not hold you through the night, they’ll murder you in your sleep. I think orcs and dwarves both eat dirt.

[erestorgoogles]

Agreed and since elves are immortal while orcs and dwarves are not it stands to reason that elves are superior due to being able to hold you every night indefinitely   

[glorfindelgooglesdeactivated]

and elves are sexy. We have way better hair than orcs or dwarves. 

[erestorgoogles]

Dwarves haircare is certainly lacking, the erebor dwarves that accompanied gandalf that time looked as if they were encouraging birds to nest in their hair due to it being all matted. And Orc hair *shudders*, truly disgusting     

[glorfindelgooglesdeactivated]

I think one of them did actually have vermin in their hair. 

dont get me started on orc hair. 

[erestorgoogles]

And Elrond let them enter Imladris?! *Shakes head* 

Yes lets not  

[ewoksarecute-deactivated2024072]

for alessandra because this pretty much sums up her personality.

[glorfindelgooglesdeactivated]

@erestorgoogles

[erestorgoogles]

What are you implying Glorfindel? 

[glorfindelgooglesdeactivated]

I thought it was pretty self explanatory Erestor. 

[erestorgoogles]

*scowls* I do not as you said “talk shit”  

[glorfindelgooglesdeactivated]

You do too.

All the time.

[erestorgoogles]

Oh? Give me an example 

[glorfindelgooglesdeactivated]

Just now. 

Literally any time I have said anything. 

[erestorgoogles]

Doesn’t that say more about you than I?  

I haven’t had any complaints from others about what i say 

[thetwinsgoogle-deactivated]

Why doesnt @aragorngoogles realize that we are way older than him

did @erestorgoogles fail at teaching math

[aragorngoogles]

Why don’t @thetwinsgoogle realize that age doesn’t equal wisdom, understanding, or thorough knowledge of the world?

Are they delusional? Or just unable to ponder nonmaterialistic concepts?

[thetwinsgoogle-deactivated]

Why doesn’t @aragorngoogles realize that we know age doesn’t equal wisdom, as we have spent excessive time with him and know he possess none? 

[aragorngoogles]

How to ask @thetwinsgoogle if they are delusional bc I didn’t get this many titles or win so many battles by “not having wisdom”????

[thetwinsgoogle-deactivated]

How to inform @aragorngoogles that most of those titles were inherited, and that he did not win the battles, the army did. 

[erestorgoogles]

I believe that this is what the humans call a “sick burn* also to answer your earlier question twins: I did not fail at teaching Estel math, he just feels older due to human aging 

[lady-byleth]

Glorfindel Headcanon

He makes jokes about his death ALL THE FUCKING TIME

“I DIDN’T DIE FOR THIS???”

“Death was easier to bear than this shit”

“How do we get out of this?” “Have you tried dying?”

“If I hadn’t died you wouldn’t even be alive today, Elrond!” “Glorfindel pls” “I DIED FOR YOU, ELROND *fake crying*”

Idk he just seems like a little shit to me

[erestorgoogles]

Glorfindel please stop doing this, it does upset people  

[glorfindelgooglesdeactivated]

I will not stop. 

I didnt die for this Erestor. 

[erestorgoogles]

*sighs* Then at least take care who you say these thing around. I for one am not bothered by it but some of the more sensitive elves have been known to cry 

[glorfindelgooglesdeactivated]

Look, its a character building experience.

That one potential guard who cried that one time was a sissy. If he wanted to be a guard he shouldn’t have cried the first time the captain of the guard messed with him.  

[erestorgoogles]

I wasn’t aware of the guard but I did observe one of the elves who tends to the gardens become visibly upset after you said one of your jokes to the captain.

It might not be the kind of character building experience that suits everyone, just a suggestion that’s all  

[gotouda]

orcs are sexy, big and theyll hold me through the night. elves are selfish materialistic twinks who eat dirt.

[glorfindelgooglesdeactivated]

@erestorgoogles

[erestorgoogles]

The person behind this must have the brain capacity of an orc themselves to write such nonsense 

[glorfindelgooglesdeactivated]

Orcs will not hold you through the night, they’ll murder you in your sleep. I think orcs and dwarves both eat dirt.

[erestorgoogles]

Agreed and since elves are immortal while orcs and dwarves are not it stands to reason that elves are superior due to being able to hold you every night indefinitely   

[glorfindelgooglesdeactivated]

and elves are sexy. We have way better hair than orcs or dwarves. 

[erestorgoogles]

Dwarves haircare is certainly lacking, the erebor dwarves that accompanied gandalf that time looked as if they were encouraging birds to nest in their hair due to it being all matted. And Orc hair *shudders*, truly disgusting     

[ewoksarecute-deactivated2024072]

for alessandra because this pretty much sums up her personality.

[glorfindelgooglesdeactivated]

@erestorgoogles

[erestorgoogles]

What are you implying Glorfindel? 

[glorfindelgooglesdeactivated]

I thought it was pretty self explanatory Erestor. 

[erestorgoogles]

*scowls* I do not as you said “talk shit”  

[glorfindelgooglesdeactivated]

You do too.

All the time.

[erestorgoogles]

Oh? Give me an example 

[aragorngoogles]

GOOGLES RP MASTERPOST

    Going to make a masterpost in order to assess who is still interested in being active in the rp as well as urls we can take if we want to be multiple characters/want to involve more people! So if you see this post on your dash and are part of the rp (and interested in maintaining your character or characters) pls reblog and tag your googles accounts so I can add them to the list!!

    Equally, if you’re interested in joining and want a certain username, please message me, and if you are able to create an account, tag your new account! 

    If you are not interested in being active anymore or want to change characters and want to figure out how to get the url, please message me and we can sort it out together!

So far, I have @merrygoogles @turingoogles and (obviously) @aragorngoogles, my primary. 

URLS I currently have up for grabs are @bardgoogles and @theodengoogles

Thanks!

[earendil-was-a-mariner]

Why didn’t we get a scene of Aragorn desperately stockpiling lembas before all of the elves left?

[thetwinsgoogle-deactivated]

@aragorngoogles

[aragorngoogles]

You know what, I don’t know, but trust me, it was there.

Also not pictured: me stress eating Lembas in the middle of the night I MEAN WAIT–

[erestorgoogles]

Estel that is not healthy 

[ewoksarecute-deactivated2024072]

for alessandra because this pretty much sums up her personality.

[glorfindelgooglesdeactivated]

@erestorgoogles

[erestorgoogles]

What are you implying Glorfindel? 

[glorfindelgooglesdeactivated]

I thought it was pretty self explanatory Erestor. 

[erestorgoogles]

*scowls* I do not as you said “talk shit”  

[gotouda]

orcs are sexy, big and theyll hold me through the night. elves are selfish materialistic twinks who eat dirt.

[glorfindelgooglesdeactivated]

@erestorgoogles

[erestorgoogles]

The person behind this must have the brain capacity of an orc themselves to write such nonsense 

[glorfindelgooglesdeactivated]

Orcs will not hold you through the night, they’ll murder you in your sleep. I think orcs and dwarves both eat dirt.

[erestorgoogles]

Agreed and since elves are immortal while orcs and dwarves are not it stands to reason that elves are superior due to being able to hold you every night indefinitely   

[lady-byleth]

Glorfindel Headcanon

He makes jokes about his death ALL THE FUCKING TIME

“I DIDN’T DIE FOR THIS???”

“Death was easier to bear than this shit”

“How do we get out of this?” “Have you tried dying?”

“If I hadn’t died you wouldn’t even be alive today, Elrond!” “Glorfindel pls” “I DIED FOR YOU, ELROND *fake crying*”

Idk he just seems like a little shit to me

[erestorgoogles]

Glorfindel please stop doing this, it does upset people  

[glorfindelgooglesdeactivated]

I will not stop. 

I didnt die for this Erestor. 

[erestorgoogles]

*sighs* Then at least take care who you say these thing around. I for one am not bothered by it but some of the more sensitive elves have been known to cry