angel on fire @erinalegra - Tumblr Blog

lestatsdelioncort

ginger // the front bottoms

#pp #tfb

aldmerii-blog

angstyindie-blog

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#also #i miss john.

Watching the new Netflix doc series about the Cecil Hotel case with Elisa Lam, and the extensive discussion of her tumblr blog had made me curious what this websites become.

#i was not healthy when i was active here #so i wont stay long #but #interesting to pop in again

unflatteringcatselfies

Blep

unflatteringcatselfies

Sleepy boy

#cats

recaption

love

573p5

darling-with-no-probs

#tattoos #art tag

sleeepinglover

via weheartit

I miss painting. I miss sketching. I miss my poetry and the way writing it felt like removing the plug on a bathtub and draining out every sour emotion I had. I miss eating a big meal without feeling guilt, fear, and the urge to run. I miss drinking tea, and reading for the fun of it. I miss being reckless with my friends. I miss knowing I could be drunk and foolish on Saturday and still kick ass in class on Monday. I miss the dumb contests and checklists Kath and I used to make. In a way, I even miss how my depression made me act carefree and loose. Before anxiety took control and gave me nothing but fear and excuses.

I miss how I felt before I ever needed meds. I miss coming home to "my room" and hugging my cat. I miss the time when the thing I was scared of most was having sex with a boy. I miss the time when people actually gave a damn, and not just because some influencer pretended to first. I miss the time when an "influencer" wasn't an everyday word or a normal "job." I miss the days when my only dream was to move to the east coast and fall in love. I miss painting my nails any damn color I felt like. I miss not being sick. I miss not being scared. I miss a lot of things, and I may never get them back.