ERIXOUNDS

Music Producer • Singer Songwriter • Mix Engineer

[erixounds]

RIP SASKIA ❤️❤️❤️

My sweet sweet Saskia passed away on Monday.  She had a rapid decline and within days I found out she had to be euthanized.  It has easily been the most devastating and painful experience of my life.  She and Kano are literally my family and it has been beyond heartbreaking.  However, each day I’m able to celebrate her life more and it is helping ease the pain.  Thank you Saskia for 12 amazing, beautiful, loving years and for taking such amazing care of your brother.  I love you forever my beautiful angel. ❤️❤️❤️

[erixounds]

Chronic pain, anxiety and depression

So it’s probably a good time to address something that has had an enormous impact on my life: when I compound fractured my left tibia and fibula.  It’s been 20 years since the accident that left me with deep scars, an un-united fibula, ptsd and chronic pain, but I’m still recovering from it.  For a long it time I let it define who I was, and it affected my friendships and relationships.  I’ve come strides from where I was, but the trauma still lingers.  Doctors prescribed heavy pain killers for years, making me dependent on them.  Fortunately, California’s medical marijuana laws made it possible for me to substitute weed for pills and break free of their hold on me.  However, I was still masking some underlying issues.  There was a bit of drinking too, but I was able to quit that after moving back in with my parents.  Being a grown adult living with your parents comes with a lot of stigma, which hasn’t been easy either.  That being said, I’m beyond grateful for their love and support.  They’ve encouraged me as I’ve transitioned from a classical music composer and pianist to a music producer, multi-instrumentalist and singer-songwriter.

After discovering I had been exposed to black mold for several months, I was forced to confront some mental health issues.  I’ve always been a bit anxious growing up — being a gay man with ADHD, and it turns out that mold exposure exacerbated my anxiety symptoms.  Anxiety and depression can often go hand in hand, and so I began to have great difficulty dealing with all the stress.  I began having full blown panic attacks for the first time in my life and it was beyond frightening.  What’s worse is that cannabis, which had been such a helpful tool in self medicating, was suddenly adding to the anxiety.  So I had to quit weed for several months and find alternatives.  I finally found a general physician through a clinic, and we began treatment for both the mold exposure and anxiety.  I even did therapy for 4 months to develop tools to understand anxiety and depression better.  I increased my exercise, began doing yoga more regularly and also started eating healthy using the Ketogenic diet.  I have shed fifty pounds so far, lowered my blood pressure to healthy levels, and reached my BMI.  There’s still some toning up to do, but I’m in the best shape I’ve ever been in.  There is a bit of pain that I deal with, and there are small bouts of anxiety and depression, but things feel much more manageable.  I’ve been able to reduce the amount of weed I smoke and vape too.  So, although I’m a work in progress, I’m proud of how far I’ve come and look forward to growing more and more.

[erixounds]

2019 in a nutshell

What a year it has been.  About 12 months ago, I found out I had accidentally been exposed to black mold for several months.  It caused my nose to stuff up 24/7, affected my breathing, and gave me severe anxiety.  Although I began treatment in April, I’m still recovering.  The good thing that came out of it is that I found an awesome doctor at a clinic (bc I don’t have health insurance) and began to focus on my overall health a lot more.  I quit drinking, and even took a long break from weed (I’m able to smoke/vape again now).  I also lost fifty pounds, lowered my blood pressure to a healthy level, and got to my BMI in about 6 months with Keto and exercise.  I’m also walking my awesome doggies everyday and enjoying hanging out with my family tremendously.

Something else that I did this year was release a lot of new music.  In the spring I released 7 tracks that I wrote, recorded, mix and mastered.  I took some time over the summer to work on my production and audio engineering skills, then released 3 more tracks in the fall.  I also produced several hiphop instrumentals and am finishing up the year with an exciting track for early 2020.  This next year I’m going to focus on effective marketing strategies and performing live more.  I’m aiming to get more production clients too and making more money by getting my music synced.

As a musician, I feel I’ve made great strides in 2019.  Since I sing, play keys, guitar, bass and drums on all my tracks, there is plenty of room to grow, develop, and learn.  My singing has gotten much more comfortable and I’ve been incorporating a larger range in my songs, namely my mixed register and falsetto.  On keys, I’ve been working on improving my jazz skills, learning a few standards and getting more familiar with improvising.  On guitar and bass, I’ve been working on improving my tone and timing both with a pick and fingerpicking.  With drums, although I mostly use digital ones, I’ve worked on developing a more nuanced sense of timing and grooves.  I’ve also been working on strengthening both my musical ear training and fluency with Dutch and French (and starting a few other languages as well with Duolingo).

Lastly, I developed my skills more as a 3D artist.  It’s only been about 14 months, but I’ve gotten pretty comfortable with the 3D program Blender and made several scenes and animations for my music with it.  I’m aiming to work on combining CGI and video in my future projects as I grow too.  Perhaps I’ll find work as a 3D artist too!

[erixounds]

Warming up

  For years I’ve ignored warming up and preparing for performances and projects.  As you can imagine, it made me very inconsistent and slowed my development.  Recently I started incorporating warmups before singing.  I also create templates for music production projects now. It has made a world of difference.  I used to think that using a raw voice was more “real” and that every project deserved it’s own setup from scratch.  Realistically, singing without warming up is potentially harmful and using templates saves a ton of time.  So, don’t forget to give your music the preparation it deserves!

Erik

[erixounds]

Learning

I always thought I could just make music and people would listen.  In reality, that’s a bit selfish and arrogant.  Truth is, my music isn’t nearly as special as I thought, and I haven’t been offering much value to the audience I have.   It’s time to make connections.  So, I want to try something new.  I’m going to blog.

I love to learn.   Despite years training as a composer and pianist, I’ve improved my musicianship, sound design and mixing skills most dramatically on my own.  I sing.  I play piano and synths.  I play guitar.  I play bass.  I drum.  Am I a virtuoso LingLing at everything?  Of course not.  But I’ve gotten very good at learning. (You should see my Duolingo.  It honestly has like 30 languages on it, albeit mostly the basics).   I’ve also begun learning 3D design and animation.  (Youtube has been an invaluable tool).  Although I do still have plenty of growing to do, I see a lot of friends shy away from skills they could easily develop with time.  So this blog is for them.  For me.  For anyone that loves music and art.  Let’s learn together.  Cheers!

Erik