Willybeeleaf

spreading kaya propaganda

[beryllinehumming]

PFFFFFF

Allie: "Hey, Tez, lend me your back for a second, I need a writing desk."

THIS DOORMAT I LOVE HIM

[ermwhatthesigma789]

Tesilid the only time someone has his back :

[microwaving-tesilid-argente]

you ever think about how, despite how terrible tesilid's first 99 lives were, that must've been at most maybe 40% of 117's life and that he probably spent most of it in the abyss

[ermwhatthesigma789]

This makes me think of that one psychological experiment where people were closed off in a room without any stimulation or distraction, but where given the choice of experiencing a mild yet unpleasant electric shock. And most chose electrocution instead of being completely destimulated and isolated.

Of course, Tesilid's situation was a bunch worse (which he even said himself), not only that but he also doesn't have any good memories to look back on; it was endless mutilation, but it was something

Whenever i think about this, I also realise how much this guy must be traumatized by pretty much EVERYTHING (existing, for example). I wonder if he would've had adverse reactions to normal objects and tasks. The fact that he can even function in a somewhat sane manner is so bamboozling but also really sad because his cope mechanism is THAT good, he didn't even get to process all that trauma...

BUT BUT I also realise that he had thousands of years to become numb to his ptsd (wdym he can block intoxication?) amnesia, insomnia, hallucinations and the general torturous methods of the void would've left no space for his earlier trauma. I remember something being said about his senses being "reborn",

So I wonder if Reed and Tez would experience different aftereffects to their mutual trauma. While Tez shows a visible aversion to darkness, but not much else. And Reed is just very volatile in general so it's hard to tell what stems from trauma and what's just...him.

[ermwhatthesigma789]