For the domestic royality prompts, “just a trip to the grocery store”?
roman caught the back of patton’s collar before they could take off. patton whined and stomped their foot. it was almost adorable enough for roman to let them go.
“dearheart,” roman began, releasing his grasp and wrapping an arm around patton’s shoulders instead. “i don’t know how many times we’ll play this game before you stop testing it.”
“you say that like i don’t always win,” patton said with a pout.
roman spluttered in offense at being called out so bluntly. “i... i put up a fight!”
patton turned to him with an utterly disarming smile, proof that roman was already losing this battle. “sure you do, honey.” they leaned in to give roman a kiss on the cheek before stepping away, ducking out of roman’s half-embrace.
roman followed, a little put-out, but forming a plan regardless. it was just a trip to the grocery store! there was absolutely no reason for them to do this anytime they needed food, and yet... patton was nigh unstoppable. when they wanted sweets, they got sweets. roman could say no to patton’s puppy eyes in almost any other scenario but somehow, with treats on the line, patton became invincible. up and down the aisles they went, filling their basket with produce, boxed goods, cans of soup, pasta - it really had been awhile since they’d shopped last.
“oh, i forgot the crofter‘s for logan, i’ll be right -”
before roman could even try to stop patton from going off in their own, they were gone. it was like a magic trick! he normally liked magic tricks but that was just a little bit ridiculous. he supposed he shouldn’t have been shocked; patton never did fail to surprise him with all sorts of talents. he rolled his eyes and carried on down the freezer aisle. well, at least with him here, patton couldn’t try to sneak ice cream into the cart.
roman found their list finished and crossed off in the next five minutes - and the store closed in the next twenty. he messaged patton to let them know he was heading for the checkout line and to warn them not to arrive with armfuls of treats. it was a useless attempt, he figured; if he couldn’t get patton to listen, he was sure a text wouldn’t do the job any better.
“babe!” patton chirped suddenly from behind roman, startling him into dropping the bag of apples onto the conveyor belt. when he turned, he found patton not with armfuls of treats but instead bags of treats hanging off of their arms.
“that is cheating!” roman accused. “you can’t go through checkout alone!”
“according to what rules?” patton asked cheekily, dropping their bags into the cart roman had mostly just finished emptying. they kept the receipt clutched tight in their hand, just in case roman presumed, but also so that he couldn’t see how much money they’d just spent. if the three bags were anything to go by, it was enough cookies and candy to last them a couple of months.
“i’m making rules,” roman said decidedly. he went through the motions with the cashier, answering their half-hearted questions on a distracted sort of autopilot. for the most part, he was eyeing patton suspiciously, in case they decided to try and sneak in any last minute candy bars. they seemed satisfied with their caper, however, and for the most part had a much more involved interaction with the courtesy clerk bagging their groceries. it was only after they’d left the store, patton cheerfully pushing the cart to their car that roman caved.
“fine,” he said loudly, throwing his arms in the air. “i guess you win this one. i will not be so easily beat next time, though!”
“sure you won’t, honey,” patton said, giggling a little. they waited until roman was in reach before pulling him in for a kiss. when they separated, patton used roman’s dazed breathlessness to continue. “thank you for putting up with my silliness.”
roman shook himself out of it, suddenly offended on patton’s behalf. “sunshine, it is never “putting up with” you!” he wrapped an arm around patton’s waist and nudged them back on the way to the car. “every moment with you is an adventure, regardless the outcome, and there’s no one i’d rather have them with.”
“hush, you charmer,” patton squealed. “besides, i think you’ll be happy to see that my hoard this time includes your favorite.”
roman gasped. “no.” he popped the trunk open, unloading the groceries, while patton retrieved one bag in particular.
“i asked them to check back stock! just in case! and voila!” they exclaimed with a grand gesture, showing to roman not one but two packages of oreos in his favorite flavor, the one that was always out for no apparent reason.
“you definitely win this time,” roman amended.
“i know,” patton agreed with a smug smile.
