An Asshole's Everyday Struggle

Trying not to be an asshole is a lot harder than it looks

[bryankonietzko]

[everydayassholestruggle]

I feel out in the cold as well... what will I do with my Friday nights now?

[everydayassholestruggle]

An Asshole's Everyday Struggle turned 1 today!

[jl8comic]

JL8 #158 by Yale Stewart

Based on characters in DC Comics. 

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Pick up the first issue of my creator-owned comic here, or merch at the new online store!

[everydayassholestruggle]

That thing where you ask a friend to do you a favor and they just... ugggh

[alewing-deactivated20150607]

Monica's Hair

So I’ve been having a conversation in PM with frantzfandom about the “Monica’s hair” scene in Mighty Avengers #6 and the concerns he had about it, and we decided to let it see the light of day. If you’ve not read the book, this might not make too much sense.

Read More

[everydayassholestruggle]

The Five People You Meet in New York City

- stringy haired White lady with a wrinkly mouth and skeletal fingers that you can't help but wonder if she is good at oral sex (LES) - disturbingly skinny model of multiracial background with portfolio under her arm and a weird bruise on her leg or neck from fighting with her dirtbag boyfriend (Union Square) - super uptight Black dude you assume is gay because of his bow tie, nipple-poking tight shirt and DSLips, but then when a woman with a ridiculous ass walks by he turns his head and says "Damn!" (Midtown West) - balding White guy in convertible with 35 - 40 year old blonde woman riding shotgun bumping Jay-Z with a "McCain/Palin 2008" bumper sticker (Midtown East) - surprisingly clean homeless guy with beard or relatively less greasy Williamsburg resident doing a load of laundry and sitting next to a fireplug and reading Ayn Rand (Bushwick)

[everydayassholestruggle]

I don't understand fashion -- is dressing like a mime, a Belgian prostitute, or Amelie a thing? I can't even tell why they think having an outfit that matches your couch pillows is a good thing. Also this address means they're in SoHo -- pretty expensive rent to pull a customer who wants to look like Amanda Palmer doing performance art in Amsterdam

[everydayassholestruggle]

Uggh, adoption? Why would I want some kid someone else didn’t want?

Someone Truly Awful… Not Me… Seriously… Okay it was me 

[jephjacques]

"I hate drawing hands!" "Hands are so hard to draw!" "I can’t draw hands!" This sort of thing is probably the #1 comment I hear from aspiring artists.

I love drawing hands. They’re probably my favorite part of the human body to draw (other than butts, of course). And while I’m certainly no Da...

[everydayassholestruggle]

The most helpful thing on Tumblr ever!

[everydayassholestruggle]

want... that is all

[everydayassholestruggle]

"The Proof of Good Parenting: that the child has no desire to be famous" - incorrectly attributed to F. Scott Fitzgerald but is actually from Alain de Botton: https://twitter.com/alaindebotton/status/329453442517045248

[everydayassholestruggle]

Due to massive budget cuts firefighters are no longer obliged to get cats out of trees without charging a $250 fee. This cat would've fallen to its death if it had not died of starvation.

Hang in there, baby indeed...

[everydayassholestruggle]

Elevator Action

My favorite thing to do on a Monday morning is to rush onto a crowded elevator and face everyone on board for the entire ride. If two people are talking to each other I like to just stare at them. Hopefully I can pull this off without blinking. If the elevator isn't crowded I have to settle for finding someone and standing right in front of them. I like to get close enough that it's uncomfortable; practically butt to crotch. A ride like that could ruin someone's entire day, maybe their entire week. For me it's the best way to get the week started.

[everydayassholestruggle]

A young and "very photogenic couple" -- he keeps it real with "original (not cliche)" tattoos, she is a "beautiful and petite" goddess -- seeks an imaginative yet tasteful photographer to document the upcoming all-natural water birth of their son. Ideally, said visionary will do it for free, out of the goodness of his or her "intrigued and creatively inspired" heart. "It will be very intimate," they promise. Who needs cash when you have (mandatory 24/7) access to a stranger's placenta?

[everydayassholestruggle]

"Well Mr. Security Officer, if you didn't want me to masturbate you shouldn't have pornographic photos and models lying around!"

http://www.australiangeographic.com.au/journal/how-did-dinosaurs-have-sex.htm

[mkupperman-blog]

Legs to Die For, Part 1

[everydayassholestruggle]

George Zimmerman - Nth Degree Asshole, Murderer.

I wouldn't advocate targeting him as if he were an unarmed Black teenager minding his own business in his own neighborhood. But if someone had his address and wanted to throw a bullet right between his beady eyes... Tough shot I know.

[everydayassholestruggle]

Endless Summer Days

I held the door for a woman with long legs and a short summer shift dress. I extended my arms as I stepped out of the way and she said: "Nice arms" So I said: "Nice legs. Wanna fuck?" So she said: "No, you fucking prick!" So I said: "Actually, I'm an asshole." But I don't know if she heard me. Last time I do a good deed.