everything is tentative.

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[everythingistentative-blog]

..And we passed the days exploring the city, emptying our wallets into pub urinals, and waxing lyrical about those who failed to see the true value of a life well lived.

[everythingistentative-blog]

The head of state has called for me by name, but I don't have time for him. It's gonna be a glorious day. I feel my luck could change.

Thom Yorke

[everythingistentative-blog]

[everythingistentative-blog]

Big fan of Fake Criterions, and thought I would give it a try myself. If one film deserved to be placed in such an esteemed collection, it would surely be this family comedy starring a transvestite Robin Williams. 

[nevver]

[everythingistentative-blog]

nevver:

Yeah!

[nevver]

[everythingistentative-blog]

nevver:

Happy Birthday Kurt Vonnegut

[nevver]

[everythingistentative-blog]

nevver:

What’s the point …

[sometimesagreatnotion]

“Our lives disconnect and reconnect, we move on, and later we may again touch one another, again bounce away. This is the felt shape of a human life, neither simply linear nor wholly disjunctive nor endlessly bifurcating, but rather this bouncey-castle sequence of bumpings-into and tumblings-apart.”

Salman Rushdie (via sometimesagreatnotion)

[everythingistentative-blog]

BBC World News posted a story on their Facebook page with the headline "China school slashing kills four." Below the link it also says "74 people like this." I'm not sure if those 74 people like the article, or are just quite fond of indiscriminate knife attacks directed at asian children.

[everythingistentative-blog]

Then, and now

It was my first day of the new school year. I was about 6 years old, and in return for my admirable ascension in the scholastic world I was rewarded by my parents with an increased salary of $10 per week. To ensure that I didn’t spend all my money in one place, my salary was rationed out, with $5 given to me on Mondays, and another $5 given to me on Wednesdays. In my eyes, having this much spending power as a child was mind-boggling. My mind raced with thoughts of all the things I could buy. Sugary beverages and food prepared in buckets of oil were the obvious choices, but I could also starve myself so that I may afford luxury items such as Nintendo games. I later learned that this idea is called “saving.”

Preoccupied with fantasies attributed to my newfound wealth, I managed to misplace my wallet somewhere between recess and lunch. I was crushed. Inconsolable even. Filled with regret for the riches I never spent, and overcome with dread for the upcoming lunch period, where I would be forced to beg for scraps from those around me. In hindsight, my reaction was perhaps a bit much. In pure monetary value I had lost $4 cash, and a wallet with a suggested retail price of $10. Had I been intelligent enough to figure out that my net-worth at the time was approximately $770.00*, I would have recognized that my loss only represented a 2% drop in net-worth. In an average time and place this would have been an acceptable loss. However, in the midst of a recession, as we were, this would be seen as a desirable end to any fiscal day.

True to my past, I was reminded of this episode today when I again misplaced my wallet. It was a different wallet this time. Refined and mature, it was created from the carcass of a dead animal, and made a statement about who I am as an individual.  It cost more than $10 as well, and was full of various plastic things integral to my survival. Despite all these reasons, I wasn’t bothered when I lost it. Instead, I was inconsolable when I found it. I can’t say what I really expected to see inside, but upon opening my rediscovered friend I was shocked to find $4, and a variety of receipts for sugary beverages (fermented) and buckets of oil (motor). Only then did it dawn on me that perhaps I need to start saving.

.

* My Age Six Net-Worth = Income ($10 per week * 36 week school year) + Assets ($400 in toys, $10 wallet) = $360 + $410 = $770.00

[everythingistentative-blog]

Just when I thought Hollywood had already put out their best summer blockbuster, they've proven me wrong, and released the trailer for Step Up 3D.

[everythingistentative-blog]

Whiteout

Tantalus, so the story goes, was an ancient ruler who was punished for his transgression against the gods. Placed in Tartarus, the deepest recess of the Greek underworld, he was made to stand in a shallow pool of water, under a grape vine, and unable for all eternity to satisfy his thirst or hunger. For his troubles, he spawned the word ‘tantalise.’ A thousand lifetimes of pain in exchange for a word. A word most commonly used for marketing snack-food.

I am standing alone in a room overlooking the ocean, surrounded by five others. As we peer through the sliding doors, water trickles into the room from an unknown source. Words are spoken and gestures made, yet the only thing we share is a common ritual. Another drink, another smoke. With each swig, the water flows more freely. Puddles collect at the bases of our feet, and soon our ankles and knees. We exhale. Smoke billows from our lungs and fills the room with a dense haze. The first pangs arrive.

Words transform into noises, spoken loudly, but slurred beyond recognition. Eyes become less focused, gestures more exaggerated. Wading across the room to interact more closely, barks and nods are made in unison, as though any of this will matter tomorrow. If details are remembered, and due not to regret, then surely a small victory may be claimed.

The haze gets thicker and each inhale provides a noxious concoction of smoke and air. With poisoned lungs and welled eyes we continue our ritual, completing each step quicker than before. Another drink, another smoke. As the rising water nears my mouth, I swallow the remnants of my cup and cast it aside. Tilting my head back I gasp for one final breath, and my lungs burn from the ingested mixture. Though the water and haze, the grapes above are visible, and I make one attempt to reach them before the flood swallows the room whole.

Frozen in time I continue with the ritual until the waters recede and the haze dissipates. I now sit tired and defeated, collectively in silence with those around me. Shells of what we once were, we nurse our growing hunger, and realise for the first time that the grapes had always been out of reach.