hello! i used to be an ao3 feed for chankai, but i have since decided to reformat this blog.
i will be a fic promo blog, meaning i will reblog ANY fics posted here and will tag them appropriately.
so, if you want to promote your fics to this blog, merely tag @exoficpromo or #exoficpromo and i will do my best to reblog the fics. i will be doing this manually (for now) so if i take some time, i apologize! (there is only one admin).
i will be accepting fics posted here or fics that are posted to ao3 or other sites but have been posted here to promote.
we will accept exo/exo pairings, as well as exo/yn/reader, exo/oc, and exo/non-exo kpop idol pairings.
this is NOT a resource to ask me where fics are. i can probably only help with my personal OTP chankai, but even then, not guaranteed! we are not a rec site or a fic finder site. so plz don't ask, i may be able to send it out to the community but there is no guarantee.
warnings: mdni!!! smutty drabble, downbad!chanyeol x fem!reader, fingering, making out, praise kink, established relationship. 0.6k words.
“C’mon, baby, you can’t blame me… shouldn’t have worn this skirt if you wanted me to keep my hands off you,” Chanyeol gasped against your lips, pressing searing kissses to your lips and all over your jaw.
You can’t help but lean into his touch, sprawled out beneath on the soft mattress he has you pinned to. It was just any normal evening, you showered, came out of the bathroom and got dressed, walked around the house quietly—not knowing you were driving Chanyeol absolutely delirious.
Until his restraint broke and now you were beneath him and he just couldn’t get enough of you.
A low whimper left your lips as his fingers moved beneath your skirt, thumb pressing to your clit through the flimsy fabric of your panties, drawing firm circles while his lips stayed attached to your neck and collarbones, sucking small marks into the supple skin that would bruise later for sure.
“So beautiful, my pretty girl…” he purred low in your ear, his fingers moving the fabric of your panties aside to quickly press two fingers inside your aching hole. Then his lips were back on yours immediately, swallowing your noises gratefully while his fingers pumped in and out of you at a deep and steady pace.
His fingers brushed against that spongy spot deep inside you repeatedly along with his thumb pressed to your clit firmly, making your thighs shake and your eyes flutter—just his fingers were enough to drive you crazy with pleasure. He knew your body like the back of his hand and knew just how to drive you crazy.
“Shit, it feels so good, yeol. Fuck!” You kept letting out the softest of noises for him and he only felt himself going more insane for you. You were far gone, your hips bucking up, almost riding his fingers while your one hand gripped his bicep, your orgasm approaching you quickly like a freight train.
He pushed his fingers deep in before pulling them almost all the way out, watching the way your hole fluttered around the tip of his fingers, he couldn’t help but groan as he pushed them back in, stroking your walls with an intensity that had you gasping.
Chanyeol’s weight was warm and heavy on you as he kept you pinned down, keeping your thighs apart with his knees, he leaned down to press a kiss to your temple, his fingers never faltering in their rhythm, “I can feel you clenching, baby, you’re so close. C’mon, let go for me,”
And that was all the encouraging it took you to finally tip over the edge of pleasure, your back arching as you let out a loud moan of his name, your cunt clenching around his fingers in a vice-like grip which only seemed to spur him to only work you harder through your orgasm. His hand moving between your thighs at an inhuman space as you gushed down his fingers.
At last, he finally and slowly pulled his fingers out of you, wet with your orgasm and he slowly pulled them up to his lips while he sucked them into his mouth and licked them clean—all while maintaining an intense eye contact with you.
You just laid there, trembling in the aftermath of your orgasm, your chest still heaving, all flushed. And so was Chanyeol, like he was the one who also had an orgasm so intense. Your eyes fluttered shut, but you were abruptly pulled out of your thoughts as you felt your boyfriend’s hands pulling down your skirt along with your panties.
“Don’t you dare think I’m done with you. You can give me a few more, baby,” with that, he flipped you over onto your stomach, hands pulling your hips up. A soft sigh left your lips and you just took it, let him manhandle you as he pleased.
Because you knew damn well that this night was far from being over.
a/n: been going through the worst unmotivated days of my life recently. i had a scrumptious baekhyun smutty fic that i was writing and i lost motivation in the middle of it, but still i just felt like writing something. this is my first ever attempt at smut in my life (i’ve never ever written smut) and i hope it’s good atleast, lol.
⟡ summary: having a bad week couldn't be that bad when you have junmyeon.
⟡ content: mdni, smut, fluff, established relationship, oral sex (f. receiving), so much praising, cum eating, aftercare | pussydrunk!junmyeon x f!reader | wordcount: 2.3k words
⟡ a/note: ugh, let's just ignore that it's only tuesday. i've been in such a soft, romantic mood for domestic!myeon lately and this req from my dear 😼 was literally perfect for writing some soft smut. hope you guys love it !!
“Babe, you home?”
Junmyeon found it odd that the living room lights were off—it seemed as if the apartment were empty. He was about to call out to you again when he noticed a soft, dim glow seeping from under the bedroom door.
He hung up his jacket, set his bag down on the armchair, and walked quietly toward the bedroom. Just as he had thought, you were lying on the bed beneath a warm blanket, fast asleep. A flash of concern crossed his mind when he noticed you were wearing only a robe. Stepping carefully so as not to startle you, he checked that your hair wasn’t wet and gently reached to pull the blanket higher to keep you warm.
Just then, you opened your eyes lazily.
“Myeon?” You blinked several times, trying to adjust to the dim light. “Shit. I fell asleep.”
“Don’t worry, princess. I’m right here.” He smiled warmly, sinking onto the bedside carpet to gently stroke your cheek. “You okay?”
You hesitated, reluctant to worry him, but the faint flicker in your expression gave you away. “I’m just tired.”
“Bad day?” He smoothed a strand of hair behind your ear, coaxing a soft yawn from your lips.
You nodded. “Bad week, actually.” You started to push yourself up, but he gently held you in place. “Babe, wait—I haven’t even put on my pajamas yet.”
“I can get those for you, baby.” Junmyeon pressed a tender kiss to your temple, then stood up and headed toward the closet. “Anything else? Are you cold? Hungry?”
“Oh, no, no.” You sat up sluggishly, rubbing your eyes. “I still need to brush my hair, put on lotion, charge my phone, and—”
“I can do all of that for you.”
A soft smile broke across your face. There was that familiar, devoted tenderness in Junmyeon’s eyes—the very same look he gave you every single day. As he set your pajamas on the edge of the bed, you cupped his cheeks and pulled him in for a sweet, slow kiss.
“You’re so, so sweet,” you murmured against his lips.
He cupped your hands in his, his own smile matching yours. “But I can handle it, Myeon. I’m just tired, not sick.”
“I know you can, love” He pressed a gentle kiss to the palm of your hand. “Just lemme take care of you tonight, okay?”
The last of your stubbornness dissolved, replaced by a quiet sigh of relief as you gave a small nod. Shifting to sit on the edge of the bed with your back to him, you felt the mattress give slightly as Junmyeon settled behind you with your hairbrush.
He moved with effortless care, holding the roots of your hair with one hand while drawing the brush through the ends so he wouldn’t pull on any tangles. The slow, rhythmic strokes were so soothing they almost made you drift off again.
“So...” Junmyeon coaxed softly, his warm breath fanning across the nape of your neck before he leaned in to press a lingering kiss to your exposed shoulder. “What happened?”
With the tension finally leaving your body, you began recounting the endless week, the unreasonable stress, and the frustration of feeling overworked. Junmyeon listened intently, humming softly in understanding and occasionally pausing his brushing to rest his chin on your shoulder, absorbing every word.
“You worked so hard, baby,” he murmured gently, brushing a soft kiss behind your ear. “Anyone with eyes can see how brilliant your ideas are. You’re the most capable person, and if they can’t appreciate that, it’s entirely their loss.”
His quiet praise warmed you from the inside out. Once your hair was smooth and tangle-free, he set the brush on the nightstand and picked up the lotion.
Remaining behind you, Junmyeon loosened the belt of your robe, letting the plush fabric slip gently down your arms to expose your shoulders and back. He pumped a bit of cream into his hands, warming it between his palms before pressing them against your skin. His thumbs worked in slow, firm circles, smoothing the lotion over your shoulders, down the length of your arms, and across the broad expanse of your back, massaging away every last drop of stress.
“My beautiful girl.”
Every few strokes, he leaned forward to leave a trail of soft, lingering kisses along your spine and the curve of your neck. When he finished with your upper body, Junmyeon quietly shifted, sliding off the bed and sinking back onto his knees on the carpet right between your legs.
He took your feet in his hands first, his warm palms rubbing away the ache of a long week before smoothing the lotion up over your calves and knees. Every movement was slow, deliberate, and worshipful. As his hands slid further up your thighs, he leaned in, pressing a row of tender, deliberate kisses against the soft skin of your inner thighs, sending a sudden wave of shivers straight down your spine.
You let out a soft gasp, your fingers instinctively tangling into his hair.
Junmyeon paused, glancing up through his lashes with a fond, knowing glint in his eyes as he felt you tremble. “Cold?” he asked softly, though the faint smirk on his lips proved he knew better.
“No,” you whispered, your heart fluttering as his hands continued their journey upward, gathering the edges of your robe. “Just... you.”
He chuckled softly, leaning up to press a sweet kiss to your lips before trailing his mouth up to your jawline.
“You deserve to be completely spoiled, babe,” he murmured against your skin, his hands resting gently on your waist. “You survived a nightmare this week; you handled it with so much grace, and… you still look absolutely breathtaking. You knew that?”
The shift in the room was magnetic. As his kisses grew warmer against your skin, a sudden, heavy warmth bloomed deep inside you.
The look in Junmyeon’s eyes softened into a heady mix of pure adoration and burning desire. Slipping his hands up to rest against your hips, he smoothed the last of the lotion over your skin, sending a fresh wave of shivers straight down your spine that pulled a soft moan from your lips.
Junmyeon’s breath hitched at the sound. “Can I…?”
“Y-yes,” you breathed, your voice barely a whisper against the quiet of the room, nodding just as the thought of him eating you out.
Junmyeon leaned in closer, his lips tracing a fiery path down your thighs, worshipping every inch of you as if he had been waiting, craving all day just for this exact moment. Junmyeon gently kissed the inside of your thighs before his lips touched your pussy—first a soft kiss, then a firm lick.
Your toes curled, your fingers instinctively tangling into his soft hair as his hands held your legs steady. “Oh—oh my god…”
“You’re so beautiful,” he muttered, breathing heavily. “So perfect.”
His tongue slid along your slit; his warm breath seemed to burn where it touched as he whispered intoxicated praises you could barely hear. He was completely insatiable, desperate to drink in every part of you, burying his face deeper as his lips parted against your sensitive folds with a greedy, feverish devotion.
“Let me make you feel good, baby,” he growled, his tongue thrusting rhythmically against your entrance, his fingers slowly sliding upward, exploring more of your skin. “Just relax, love. Leave it all to me.”
“Myeon—” you whimpered in a barely audible whisper, clutching his hair more tightly to anchor yourself against the sudden, overwhelming sensation. Your legs squeezed instinctively around his face, your hips lifting and rocking back and forth in an uneven, helpless rhythm toward him. “You feel so—fuck—so good,” you breathed.
Junmyeon let out a low, gravelly growl against your skin, a dark, satisfied smirk curving his lips before he buried his face completely into you again, his nose grinding. He was utterly drunk on your taste, lost to the sensation as his mouth and tongue worked in seamless tandem—slurping firmly at your clit and pressing deep, wet kisses into your folds. He made sure you felt the absolute weight of his devotion, the relentless heat of his breath, and the endless stream of unraveled worship pouring from his lips.
“So sweet… fuck, baby—you taste so good,” he rasped, his voice thick and breathless, tumbling out in a feverish, intoxicated blur between greedy licks. “So fucking good…”
His hands were everywhere, ghosting over your flushed skin with a needy, possessive touch as they dragged up the curve of your waist to squeeze your hips. When one of his palms slid higher and firmly cupped your breast, your free hand scrambled blindly across the sheets before covering his, clutching his fingers tightly as if trying to anchor yourself to anything solid.
You couldn’t hold it back any longer. The pressure building in your core crashed over you with terrifying speed, giving you barely enough time to gasp out a warning.
“M-Myeon—oh god, wait—I’m—fuck!” you whimpered, your voice cracking into breathless, broken cries as the first sharp wave of your orgasm hit.
Your thighs clamped tightly around his face, trapping him against you in a desperate reflex. A low, muffled moan tore from Junmyeon’s throat at the sudden pressure, but rather than pulling back, his hands locked onto your body to hold you firmly in place, his palm heavy and warm beneath your trembling grip. He refused to let up for even a second, drinking you with a worshipful intensity. His tongue cleaned up every slick drop of your juices, the wet, heavy sounds filling the quiet room alongside your helpless whimpers.
“That’s it, baby… give it all to me,” he murmured against your slick skin, his words muffled against your flesh as he kept lapping at you through every pulse. “Ah… fuck, you’re doing so good.”
“Babe—ah! Myeon, please—” you sobbed out in a high, trembling whisper, your knuckles white as one hand pulled at his hair and the other squeezed his hand against your chest.
Overwhelmed by the sensory overload, your hips continued to buck and rock unevenly against his face. Junmyeon matched your frantic rhythm stroke for stroke, his tongue relentlessly coaxing out every last vibration of your peak until you were left completely unravelled, trembling violently in his hold.
As the overwhelming intensity finally slowed and subsided into a soft, lingering warmth, Junmyeon’s touch never once lost its gentle, deliberate focus. He remained on his knees on the carpet between your legs for a long moment, his chest rising and falling in steady, heavy breaths. When he finally looked up, his lips were visibly swollen and bright.
“You okay, love?” Junmyeon asked softly, his voice a low, raspy purr that sent a fresh wave of warmth straight to your cunt.
“Myeon… I’m more than okay,” you whimpered weakly, your voice still breathless as you stared down at him. “You’re incredible. Seriously.”
A proud, satisfied smirk tugged at the corner of his red lips. “I told you I was gonna spoil you tonight, didn’t I?”
With breathtaking patience, he reached for a soft tissue. His movements were so gentle and reverent it felt like a silent act of worship, every touch making sure you felt completely cared for, protected, and cherished down to the smallest detail.
“It’s okay, babe,” you murmured, shifting slightly on the mattress. “You don’t have to.”
“Just a second, lemme get you all fresh,” he whispered, leaning up to press a quick, reassuring kiss to your knee.
Only when he knew you were comfortable, he reached for your pajamas on the edge of the bed. Remaining on his knees, he guided you and helped you slip into them. His hands lingered over every seam, his fingers brushing against your skin at every opportunity as if he simply couldn’t bear to break physical contact.
“There, sweet girl,” he coaxed softly, smoothing the fabric over your shoulders and buttoning it up with careful, deliberate fingers. “So cozy.”
“Thank you, Myeonnie,” you whispered, feeling your eyelids grow heavy under his attentive gaze.
Once you were dressed, he gently hooked his arms under your back and knees, lifting you with effortless care to position you comfortably against the pillows.
As he leaned over to pull the warm comforter up to your chin, the sight of his kiss-swollen lips hovering just inches away made a sudden wave of shyness wash over you. Driven by a quiet, spontaneous burst of affection, you reached up, wrapped your arms securely around his neck, and pulled him down into a sweet, lingering kiss—stealing the taste of him right back.
Junmyeon let out a low, muffled sound of surprise and delight against your mouth, his entire body melting as he collapsed onto the mattress beside you.
“Oh? What was that?” he murmured into the tiny space between your lips, a fond, breathtaking smile breaking across his face as he noticed the rosy blush deepening on your cheeks.
“You deserved it,” you mumbled, hiding your face slightly against his shoulder as the sudden shyness settled in. “You took such good care of me.”
“I’ll always take care of you,” he replied fiercely, without a second of hesitation. He wrapped his arms tightly around your waist, pulling you flush against his chest in a sweet embrace. Junmyeon tucked his face into the crook of your neck, inhaling deeply and peppering soft, worshipful kisses along your collarbone, your jaw, and the tip of your ear. “You have no idea how much I love doing this for you. You deserve the entire world, but until I can give you that, you’re stuck with me taking care of you like this.”
“I don’t mind being stuck with you,” you giggled softly, the sound muffled against his chest as you tightened your arms around his shoulders.
“Good, because I’m not letting go tonight. Or ever,” he whispered, his thumb stroking soothing, endless circles over your hip beneath the blanket. “Sleep, baby. I’m right here.”
genre: brothers best friend!au, angst!!!! toxic!!!!! (lotsa smut), theres a 6-year age diff between cy & reader, suho as your brother who loves sweet potato fries <3
4k words
inspired by back 2 u & new thing by @eomayas. ive been so hyperfixated on these two stories that i wrote this. okii im done yapping, pls enjoyyyy <3
“She had her hands around you, Yeol!” You scream at him as you get out of the car and chase after him. The fucking audacity of him to walk out on you when he was the one in the wrong.
“I told you I’m done talking about this.” Chanyeol walks further from you, resisting the urge to even spare you a glance when he says the next thing, knowing he’ll fold immediately once he makes eye contact with those doe eyes of yours. “Let’s just break up, fuck.”
Your heart sinks and you stop walking. “Fine.” You mutter to yourself. Like the stubborn woman that you are, you turn on your heel and head in the opposite direction of your apartment, instead heading toward the door leading outside of the underground garage.
Chanyeol hears your heels clacking in a different direction and frowns. He turns around and sighs when he sees you’re already halfway to the door.
“Where are you going?” Chanyeol shouts behind you, already irritated by your antics.
“Away from you!!” You yell back, making sure to switch your hips as you strut away. You were wearing your tightest bootcut jeans with a pair of wrap-around strapped heels. The combo always made your ass look good – lethal, actually. And you knew Chanyeol was watching you leave.
"What do I tell Junmyeon??” Chanyeol is very pissed at this point, unsure how to tell his best friend that his little sister was refusing to come home and that it was entirely his fault.
You lift a middle finger up in the air, not even sparing him a glance before you’re out the door.
“Fuck.” Chanyeol swears before dragging a hand through his hair, exhaling all the frustrations out of his body. Now he really had to explain to Junmyeon that his little sister was still wandering the streets at 2am.
Junmyeon had asked Chanyeol to pick you up from whatever club you were at on a Friday night. It was getting late and Junmyeon was getting worried. You weren’t sure why. You were 23, no longer that naive 18-year-old that relied on the kindness of strangers to get home. You handled yourself then, and you are still handling them now. With a little more of your frontal lobe developed, of course.
You never refused Junmyeon’s offer though, especially since you started dating Chanyeol. It was the perfect excuse for you and him to spend more time with each other without having Junmyeon be suspicious. Also, you wouldn’t have to pay for an uber (you only ride with certified strangers now 🙂↕️).
The night started out fun. You danced together (grinded and whined on him). He bought you drinks and took care of you, making sure you were drinking water between tequila shots. You even had a hot and heavy make out session in some dark corner of the club. It was the perfect night out.
Until some girl, who apparently knew Chanyeol very, very well, came along and wrapped an arm around his waist. That’s when you went apeshit and grabbed a fistful of her hair. And supposedly, Chanyeol thought you were “doing too much”. You don’t think you were doing enough.
It was dark out tonight. It was quiet, peaceful even. The streetlights lighting up the city were really pretty, you think, especially since you left your glasses at home and they were shining brightly like Christmas lights. If you hadn’t gotten into a fight with Chanyeol, this would’ve been a really nice and romantic walk. You sigh.
Chanyeol is the literal man of your dreams. You’ve dated a handful of assholes in the past. He is, by far, the most dependable, reliable, consistent man you have ever dated.
He just pissed you off when he got too friendly.
You sigh for the nth time that night.
Or maybe you were too much.
Maybe you’re too overbearing, too possessive, too... too much of everything.
“Fuck.” You mutter to the cold air. You search around your surroundings and realize you are completely lost. You didn’t think you were walking for that long.
“Junmyeon’s going to kill me.” You cry as you squat down and cover your face with your hands. With tears, you reach for your phone to call your big brother.
“Y/N?”
You freeze.
You slowly glance up at the familiar voice. Chanyeol. His name comes out of your mouth like he’s your knight in shining armor. He’s standing over you with that soft look on his face. The one he always gives you after you throw a tantrum and he can’t help but forgive you.
It makes you feel like shit. Because if anyone deserves a good and loving girlfriend, it’s Chanyeol.
“Come on, get up.” His voice is gentle. He’s always gentle with you. He drapes his jacket around your bare shoulders and helps you up. He is too good for you. Your arms wrap around his waist immediately. You bury your face in his chest as the tears begin again.
“I’m sorry.” You really are.
“I know.” He rubs your back comfortingly before he ushers you back into his car.
--------
You have no idea how you got here, but you were now giggling on Chanyeol’s lap in the back of his G-Wagon, laughing and smiling like you didn’t just break up two seconds ago. Your lips shower his neck with a million kisses while his hands rest lazily around your hips. His eyes sparkle when he isn’t mad at you. You feel like you’re floating on cloud nine whenever you’re in his arms like this.
“Junmyeon is going to call soon.” Chanyeol laughs as you trap him in the backseat of his SUV. He has no idea how you two got here either, but this was the charm of your relationship. Hot and cold. Sad one minute, angry another, happy the rest of the time. It drives him insane, but you are the type of insane he loves to manage.
"Why? You scared?” You say before dragging your tongue across his ear, earning you a shudder from him.
“No, but doesn’t he have your location? Won’t he be suspicious that you’re in the building but not in your room?” Chanyeol asks, still worried about your brother. You don’t know why he’s so concerned about Junmyeon when Junmyeon has never once cared about your dating life. You doubt he cares you’re dating his best friend.
“He lost location privileges when he went psycho that one time.”
Chanyeol smirks at the memory. He remembers that one time.
It wasn’t too long ago, for your 1-year anniversary. Chanyeol surprised you with a weekend stay at a luxurious hotel. You were so happy; you spent the first day fucking like bunnies, from the moment he scanned that card until you couldn’t stand up on your own. You couldn’t keep your hands off each other for that very short weekend. He had you against the door, by the window, in the jacuzzi, on the sink – everywhere. You left the hotel with 87% on your phone.
You had told Junmyeon that you would be going out and probably stay at Jihyo’s, which was fine for him. He liked Jihyo. She seemed a bit more responsible.
What was not fine was that he checked your location at 2 in the morning and freaked when he saw that you were at some fancy hotel that he knew you could not afford. You’re a college student. You had no business booking an expensive 5-star hotel.
It did not help that you would not answer any of his 27 phone calls.
“Chanyeol~” You whine, grinding your hips on the growing hard-on in his pants. You were craving his attention, and he was asking one too many questions for your taste. You place a gentle hand on his right cheek and find the glistening eyes you love so much. “Please.”
His attention is charmed by the sound of your plead. He smiles, admiring how pretty you looked begging for him.
He leans closer and gently presses his lips on yours. You moan, happy to be getting what you wanted. His tongue slips past your lips and slowly brushes against yours. Your hips move in tandem with his tongue, slow and hungry for more. You run a hand through his hair and deepen the kiss. The vibration of Chanyeol’s moans in your mouth is enough to feel butterflies flutter in your stomach.
“You’re my perfect girl.” Chanyeol leans back a bit to praise you while you chase after his lips. Your stomach flips at his words. He really is the man of your dreams.
You press your lips back to his own pair as your hand slides down to the bulge in his pants. You unbuckle his belt with one hand and unzip him. He hums as you massage him through his briefs.
“My perfect, perfect girl.” His hands massage your ass. He loves these jeans on you so much. Sometimes, when you wear them, he likes to make you upset just so he can watch you walk away from him. He hisses when you stroke his length and flick the tip with your thumb. He whines when you try to leave his lips to put them elsewhere. He shakes his head and motions for you to come back.
"Baby, I wanna make you feel good.” You pout as you continue to stroke him.
“You are.” He says, voice a bit shaky from your touch. “Now, come back here.” His hand gently caresses the back of your neck and pulls you into him, closing the space between you.
You softly suck on his tongue, slowly pulling away and feeling every inch of the wet muscle. His cock twitches in your grip when your hand pumps him a little faster. You peek at Chanyeol and smile at the sight of his half open mouth and scrunched up face.
Your lips find his again, kissing him softly. You were in love with this gentle giant who has been nothing but patient with you. You tighten your grip around him, settling into a steady rhythm. You use the precum accumulating to lubricate his length, your wrists twisting in a way you know he loves.
“Fuck” He whispers against your lips before both hands cradle your face, needing to deepen the kiss. It’s soft, wet, gentle, and so, so painfully good. Chanyeol’s hips buckle up to thrust in your hand. He’s close and so eager to reach his end.
“Cum for me, baby.” You mutter, tickling his lips.
His eyes flutter open and immediately his gaze softens at the sight of you, so happy and so excited for him to cum all over your pretty fingers.
His hips and your hand fall into a synchronized pace. He can’t take it. His head falls on your shoulder as he breathes heavily into your ear, feeling himself come close to unraveling.
“Fuck, baby.” He swears as his cock twitches in your grasp and his cum covers your knuckles. You grin, taking your fingers and licking it clean from his cum.
Chanyeol’s gaze darkens and doesn’t let you finish.
He has you on your back in an instant, legs already in the air for him.
"How the fuck-” Chanyeol says when he sees how intricate your heels’ straps were. He didn’t think you would wear vine-looking heels under the jeans. What was the point?
You giggle at his frustration which makes him snap at you. “Oh, you think it’s funny?” You fold your lips in your mouth and shake your head, suppressing the grin on your face. Chanyeol doesn’t find it funny. He has your jeans pulled down to your knees aggressively, unable to remove them completely ‘cause of your stupid shoes. You yelp when he moves your thong to the side and rubs your folds with two fingers, eyes maintaining contact with yours.
He bends down and drags his tongue slowly across your slit while he holds your legs up. Your breath hitches when his tongue teases your entrance. He kisses it lightly, admiring how pretty it is before his finger runs soft circles around your hole. “My pretty girl, you’re soaking wet. It’s getting all over my seats.” He teases, but he isn’t lying. You can feel your juices leaking slowly to your ass from anticipation. He was driving you crazy.
“Chanyeol, please.” You beg, not wanting to go slow anymore.
“Please what?” Chanyeol tilts his head, playful glint in his eyes. You whine and pout, trying your best to move closer to him but his grip is far stronger than you are.
“Please touch me, Chanyeol.”
Before Chanyeol could even respond something witty, your phone rings in the front seat. Chanyeol grabs it. “Answer.” He taps the screen before giving it to you.
“Hello?”
“Y/N, Where are you?” Junmyeon sounds calm but you know he’s fuming. You glance at your phone and the time shows 4:27. Shit.
“Um,” Chanyeol surprises you with his mouth on your pussy, immediately sucking and lapping his tongue across your slit. “We’re just going to get something to eat.”
Chanyeol almost snorts too loud, laughing at your unintentional innuendo. You slap his shoulder to shut up. He bites his lip when he sees your pussy clench from trying to hold your laugh in. He leans back down and continues his work, dragging his tongue up and down. His drool mixes with your juices as he slurps hungrily. You’re struggling to focus, forgetting all about your dearest brother.
“Okay good, you’re with Chanyeol.” You hear Junmyeon sigh in relief.
“Uh huh” You say breathily, wanting him to end the call. You almost squeal out loud when Chanyeol adds two fingers and starts thrusting into you while simultaneously sucking you dry.
“Well, go straight home after. It’s getting late.” Chanyeol speeds up, hooking his finger to hit your sweet spot. You’re covering your mouth with your arm, hoping that it’s enough to muffle your moans.
“Y/N, I’m serious.” Junmyeon says when he doesn’t hear a reply from you and assumes that you’re rolling your eyes at him. You are. Just not at him. “Chanyeol and I have a game tomorrow.”
“Yes, I get it.” You spit out, annoyed and almost reaching your end.
“Come on, baby.” Chanyeol whispers as low as possible but loud enough for you to hear.
“Junny, I have to go.” You hope the petname is enough to defuse his anger for hanging up abruptly.
“Fuckkkkkk Chanyeol” You scream as you let your phone drop from your grip. You clench around his fingers as he continues to fuck you.
“Yessssss” He cheers as you burst on his expensive leather, legs shaking and dangling in the air. Chanyeol finally lets go of your legs and comes up to meet your face.
“Fuck,” He kisses your neck. “You’re so” Your jaw. “fucking perfect” Your lips.
“I love you so much, baby.” He peppers your face with kisses. You sigh in his grip, high on ecstasy. This must be what heaven feels like. “I’m so sorry for being too friendly. You’re the only one for me.”
His apology jolts you wide awake and you feel your energy come right back up. You feel so fucking validated right now. “I love you too, Yeol. Come fuck me upstairs?”
Chanyeol’s eyes widen at your invitation. He must have fucked the brains out of you because there is no way you were suggesting getting fucked with Junmyeon in the next room.
“Baby, we can’t.” Chanyeol tries to let you down gently, massaging your sides.
“Why not? We’ll be so quiet!” Your hand finds his waist and stroke it affectionately. “I was so good on the phone call.”
“Yes, you were.” Chanyeol smiles proudly and lightly presses his lips against yours. He thinks for a second before he looks at your puppy dog eyes. “Fine. But one bed creak, and I’m running back to the couch. Deal?”
“Deal!!” You exclaim, pulling up your jeans excitedly and giving him a kiss before you’re stumbling out of his car.
--------
Junmyeon comes out of his room, half-awake, when he hears that you’ve finally made it home. He checks the time and it’s already 5 in the morning. He doesn’t expect to see Chanyeol trailing behind you, but he guesses it’s reasonable for him to just sleepover when there’s a game at 10 in the morning.
"Hi Junny!” You unclasp your heels with a flick of your wrist and hop to your brother. Chanyeol’s jaw drops at how easy it was for you to remove them. “We got you some fries.” You beam, giving him a kiss on the cheek. “Thank you for asking Chanyeol to pick me up.”
“Of course.” He takes the bag and gasps when he sees sweet potato fries, his favourite. “But you shouldn’t stay out too late! You have to respect other people’s time.” Sweet potato fries aren’t enough to stop the nagging apparently.
“Mhmm” You wave him off before faking a yawn and heading to your room. You weren’t expecting to see Junmyeon up so late but that’s why you begged Chanyeol to drive and get the fries as a precaution. Hopefully, he finishes them quickly so Chanyeol can sneak into your room.
--------
“Hey, is it okay if I sleep over?” Chanyeol meets Junmyeon in the kitchen. “Your sister was a handful tonight.”
“Sorry, she doesn’t like it when I pick her up.” Junmyeon pops a fry in his mouth. “Says ‘I nag too much’.” He throws air quotes in the air. Chanyeol notices how awake he looks now. He’s silently regretting the fries. He should’ve gotten him hot cocoa or something, anything to put him back to sleep so he can slip away and be with you.
“I don’t know how I’m any better. She picks a fight with me every time.” Chanyeol shrugs, stealing a fry from the bag. He might as well eat if he’s not getting to you anytime soon.
“Yeah... I’m sorry.” His best friend sighs before eating another fry. “If it’s any consolation to you, I think it’s because she has a crush on you.”
Chanyeol chokes on a fry. Junmyeon laughs and pats him on the back. He coughs up the fry and clears his throat.
“What?” Chanyeol feigns surprise, unsure how to respond. He knows you have a crush on him. You just told him you loved him in the car.
“She gets a bit mean with people she cares about.” Junmyeon explains, smiling at the thought of his not-so little sister and your weird way of expressing yourself. “I think it’s cute. She’s never been the one to be subtle with her feelings.”
“Oh,” Chanyeol wants to tell him. He’s been wanting to tell him. But the words can’t come out. “Maybe she does.”
Junmyeon laughs as he finishes the last of his fries. “Don't tell her I told you.” He pats him on the shoulder before throwing the brown bag in the trash and heading back to his room. “And no worries. Make yourself at home. We can pass by your place for your stuff. Night.”
Chanyeol waits for Junmyeon’s door to shut before rushing to you.
His heart softens when he catches you asleep, cuddling a pillow as long as you are. He tries to shut the door as quietly as possible and slips into your bed. The silk sheets you asked him (guilt-tripped him) to buy were proving themselves helpful in insulating the noise. He’ll make sure to let you know later.
Your shoulder peeks through your blanket, the silk slipping easily against your skin. Instinctively, he lightly presses a kiss on your exposed skin, unintentionally waking you up. You shift in your sleep and turn to face him. A smile rushes to your face when you see the familiar brown eyes that you love so much.
“You’re so pretty without makeup.” Chanyeol examines your bare face, knuckles lightly grazing on your cheek. He rarely gets to see this side of you. You were high-maintenance and he loved every bit of it, but sometimes, he wishes he could just see your natural features a little more often.
“You’re just saying that to be nice.” You whine under his touch, moving your head to the side to kiss the palm of his hand. Chanyeol simply shakes his head. His palm slides to the nape of your neck, lightly brushing his thumb against your skin.
“You’re perfect, my love.” He leans down to kiss you, his knee nudging your legs open. He removes his pants, shimmying it off before he situates himself in between you, now hovering over you. You wrap a leg around him and whine beneath him when you feel his hard-on through his boxers.
“You said you’d be quiet.” He whispers, hooking a finger around your thong and pulling it down. Once off, he balls it up in his fist. “Ah”
Your mouth opens and he tucks it into your mouth. “You have to be quiet.” His thumb swipes your cheek gently before leaving it a sweet kiss.
“Nod if you understand.” His voice is low, lips tickling the side of your face. He gently moves your face with his index finger and slowly nods his head when you meet his eyes. You follow the way he moves his head, doing anything to have him inside you again.
"Good girl.” A mischievous smile grows on his face. He’s so turned on right now; he quickly takes his cock out of his boxers and teases your slippery slit, still wet from before.
“I’m going to need help staying quiet too, my love.” He hisses when he slowly enters you. Feeling his thickness fill your walls, you bite into the undergarment, trying to muffle the moan, and shut your eyes tightly.
“I know, baby.” He whispers in your ear, his head now resting by your ear so he can mutter as lowly as possible. His hips move methodically into you, deep and slow. It takes everything in you not to squeal when his thrusts hit deeper inside you. Your legs wrap around his waist and pull him closer so he could continue hitting that sweet spot inside of you.
“You’re doing such a good job.” He praises you, massaging a hand on your hip encouragingly. You gasp when his fingers squeeze around your breast. His mouth follows soon after, sucking and flicking his tongue around your nipple. It was suddenly getting harder and harder to breathe with your mouth covered.
He glances up at you, mouth still on your body and hips still moving in and out of you. Your fingers run through his hair, lightly squeezing when he sucks on you a little too hard and his thrusts reach a little deeper. You’re both looking at each other with adoration and love in your eyes. You feel like it’s all too good to be true. Like you’ll fuck this up somehow.
You almost did, multiple times. And every single time, he came back for you.
You’re terrified of the day he won’t.
As if he can hear you overthink, he pulls the fabric out of your mouth. “What are you thinking so hard about, hm?” His lips find yours, distracting you from your thoughts. He makes your mind go at ease every single time. You can’t believe how lucky you are.
His hips move faster, getting closer to his end. He tried his best to keep the bed quiet, but your walls were so warm around him, he needed to release inside you. The springs were creaking softly, and you both were too horny to care.
“I love you I love you I love you.” You chant as you feel yourself reach your climax, tightening your walls around him. He’s not too far from it either, thrusting into you and kissing you passionately.
“I love you so much.” He whispers against your lips before he drops next to you.
You fall asleep in each other’s arms, hoping your bodies remember to get up before Junmyeon does in the morning.
chananyeol bong: i'm loving this tiny font thing. i feel so cute. this also might be a three parter. i wanted it to be 2 parts but idk part 2 is getting long. part 2 is almost done but im an anxious avoidant and i dont want it to end so its taking a biiiiiit longer 🙈😛
genre: college!au, fuckboy sehun!!! (not really, he just crushes a lot 😛), very thirsty virgin reader (she needs him)
3.2k words
it didnt take much to get oh sehun between your legs.
you had met at a mutual friend’s party. it was almost too on the nose, like you were in a romcom.
he saw you from across the room, looking so helpless at the drinks table.
“youre thinking way too hard.” a voice startles you.
you look up to find a really, really, really attractive tall gentleman grinning down at you, clearly amused by how clueless you look right now.
“i have no idea what any of this stuff is and,” you search around you for your friend and shrug. “my friend, who does know, abandoned me.”
“i won’t abandon you.” he smiles even brightly. “what do you like? sweet? sour? strong?”
you try to suppress the growing smile on your face while shaking your head. “i have no clue. this is my first time drinking.”
his brow raises in surprise then the corner of his lip raises to a smirk. you can’t believe this is happening. you start to laugh, feeling sorry for yourself. gosh, you’re pathetic. 22 and still haven’t had a taste of alcohol.
“no worries, i’ll make you something you’ll like.” his eyes crinkle sweetly and you know you shouldn’t be accepting drinks from someone you didn’t know but he was so dreamy. you couldn’t help but nod and watch him make you a drink. your eyes follow him reach for a blue bottle then a cranberry ginger ale. “here you go. try it.”
“that’s it?” you thought it would be a lot more complex than that. you grab the red cup, a bit skeptical. you stare up at him, smiling at him nervously.
“trust me.” he grins, finding you absolutely adorable at this point.
you take a sip and widen your eyes. surprisingly good. “woah”
the tall man laughs and cheers his cup with yours. “drink up.”
you must have had one too many sips before you were stumbling on your feet and a giggling mess. you were clinging onto the man who made the strong ass drink, letting him take you to a couch. you plop down and drag him with you. he’s also a giggling mess but not because he’s drunk, but because he thinks it’s hilarious that you’re drunk after 5 sips.
you grab his chin between your fingers and squint your eyes at him.
“what the fuck is your name? so i can report you for getting me drunk.” you frown at him. his eyes crinkle again and you swear they look like a pair of crescent moons on his face.
“oh sehun. and what is your name, lightweight?” sehun’s eyes drift to your lips then back up to your eyes, still grinning. he’s having a really fun time with you.
“y/n!!!” your friend screams your name before you have the chance to introduce yourself. “where have you been?? i’ve been looking all over for you- who are you?” your friend finally sees you holding this man’s chin in your hand.
“this is oh sehun. -hiccup- he got me drunk.” you slur your words. your friend frowns and pulls you up from the couch.
“we’ve only been here for half an hour. what did you give her?”
“woahh, she was looking at that table for a solid 10 minutes before i got to her.” he points to the spot where you two met and defends himself. “and, where were you? who leaves their friend alone for half an hour? at a party where she doesn’t know anyone?”
“thats not true. i know jackson!” you interject his little speech.
“where the only other person she knows is jackson!” sehun corrects himself, winking at you after including that little correction just for you. you blush, grinning from ear to ear. too infatuated by this man, you don’t notice the smoke coming from your friend’s ears. she groans, dragging you away from oh sehun.
the last thing you remember from that night is oh sehun waving at you with the widest smile on his face, hoping that this wouldn’t be the last time he saw you.
--------
the next time you see oh sehun was by accident. you were trying to find a spot in the library to study: preferably in a quiet aisle where no one ever goes. you finally reached the fourth floor of the library and charged towards the palaeontology section.
“oh shit.” you jump at the scene before you.
you had accidentally walked in on a couple making out on the floor of one of your favourite study spots. you quickly turn away and walk in the opposite direction, cheeks red in embarrassment.
you hear the couple scramble behind you and run ahead of you, giggling like they were teenagers caught by a teacher. you notice his long legs first. you then scan his backside and there’s no doubt that that’s the same man from jackson’s party.
you scoff, so he had a girlfriend. with the way he flirted with you that night, you couldn’t believe he was in a relationship. poor her, you think.
you don’t get much studying that day.
--------
the third time you meet is in a study room jackson had booked. oh sehun was sitting beside a different girl than the one from the library. they were very much flirting instead of studying. you don’t even think they realized someone new has entered the room. she was twirling her finger around the string of his hoodie while sehun had that same stupid grin on his face. you were getting the sense that oh sehun might not be much of a commitment man.
pretending like this didn’t bother you, you place your bag on top of the table and take a seat across the “couple”. it catches sehun’s attention and you finally make eye contact.
“y/n” your name escapes from his lips like he’s been wanting to say it for the longest time.
“oh sehun.” you respond as you take your laptop and textbook out, trying your best not to get too excited by the fact he still remembers your name.
the girl shifts her eyes between the two of you and slowly releases her hold on the string. sehun doesn’t seem to notice her disappointment as he tilts his head at you curiously.
“i didn’t know you guys knew each other.” jackson raises an eyebrow. it feels like his two worlds were colliding. you weren’t exactly the type to go out of your way to make new friends. and sehun didn’t seem like the type to be just friends with a girl.
“we met at your party. briefly.” you explain, eyeing the way sehun was still looking you like he was studying you. you dont’t hate it. it was very enticing.
"i’m surprise you remember.” sehun says, smile creeping up on his face.
“kinda hard to forget.” you finally crack a smile in his direction. sehun’s heart swoons.
sehun didn’t get much studying that day, spending most of his time pretending to read on his laptop while sneaking glances of you. that girl was long gone, having left shortly after the second time sehun sighed just from the sight of you.
he doesn’t make the mistake of letting you go without getting your number first. “call me whenever.” he said, handing you the sticky note with his number on it.
you took it.
and unashamedly called him the very next day.
“y/n?” sehun’s surprised voice greets you.
“do you answer all your phone calls like that?” you ask, shocked he guessed it was you right away.
"what, you dont like it when a man yearns?”
you melt, almost dropping your phone. your heart is racing hearing him flirt with you.
“it depends on what you’re doing later.” you scream silently against your pillow, cringing at your attempt to flirt.
“oh?” you can hear him grinning. and you don’t even care how forward you’re being. you needed to see him again. “meet me at the library. i’ll take care of the rest.”
“and wear something nice.”
--------
you had no idea what he meant by nice. you weren’t sure if he meant casual nice or fancy nice so you settled for a black maxi dress and accessorized with gold jewelry. you take a glance at your outfit in a window and bite your lip nervously. hopefully, this is what he meant.
you exhale. you were so nervous. this was going to be your first date. the only thing you knew about dating came from books and movies. you’re about to check your phone for the time when your eyes catch the sight of sehun.
and oh god, did he look hot.
he was wearing a pair of denim pants beaded with pearls and a brown leather jacket. it was a simple set but he looked insane, like a model fresh off the runway.
“hello,” he smiles, looking you up and down. “you look beautiful.”
you can feel your ears burn red from the compliment. “thanks. you look really handsome.”
he chuckles, “come on, let’s go.” he takes your hand and leads the way.
--------
sehun takes you to a korean-japanese fusion restaurant. it’s small and intimate. your knees keep brushing against each other under the tiny table.
“whyd you pick such a small place for your long legs?” you ask, laughing at the seventh time he nudges your thigh.
“because i wanted to be close to you.” he smiles proudly as you blush like crazy, heat rushing to your cheeks.
it really didn’t take much for you to invite him over.
it was laughable really how quickly you pounced on him. he barely had time to shut your door when you tackled his lips and slammed him against the door.
“oh fuck, okay.” he mutters against your lips, taking off his leather jacket and throwing it on your floor. he took over very quickly, holding your head firmly as he kisses you hungrily. you moan against his lips. you have never been kissed like this before.
“fuck, touch me.” he leads your hand to his package. your eyes widen at how big it was, you can barely hold it in the palm of your hand. you rub him through the denim, only feeling a teeensy bit nervous, but mostly excited to be filled to the brim by him. sehun’s own hand snakes its way to your breast, squeezing it tightly in his grasp. you squeal, biting onto his lip accidentally.
that only gets sehun wanting more, his hips thrust into your hand as he grows more and more impatient.
“your room?” he says breathlessly and you have to blink a few times before you remember where to go, distracted by how much you need this man in you. you grab him by the wrist and drag him to your room, shutting the door with urgence. you thank the gods that your roommate was out on a friday night because you will not be holding back.
you push sehun onto your bed and straddle him to his amusement. your dress was now hiked up to your stomach so it was only your underwear rubbing up against his bulge. sehun is smiling so widely, he thinks his cheekbones are going to fall off by the end of this night. he needed to be inside you. he needed to feel you unravel under him. he wanted you to be squirming for him, begging him to fill you up.
he pulls you in for another kiss, making out with you as he leads your hips. youre both moaning in each other’s mouths at how good you felt against each other. you gasp when his fingers move your underwear to the side and swipes against your folds. he teases you for a bit, gently circling your entrance.
“look at me.” his other hand holds the side of your face, urging you to make eye contact with him. you gasp when he inserts a finger inside of you and slowly fucks you. you felt yourself pulse around his digit. “good?”
you can’t speak, only able to nod as he continues to fuck you with a single finger. you hold onto his shoulders for balance, closing your eyes to enhance the feeling. sehun doesn’t like that, however. “i said look at me.” he adds another finger. you moan out his name, opening your eyes to stare into his brown pair.
your hips begin to move up and down on him, loving the feeling of him filling you up with only two fingers. “that’s right. fuck yourself, you slut.” you squeeze around him unintentionally at the derogatory nickname.
“oh you like it when i call you a slut? my little slut. you’re not as innocent as you claim to be, huh?” sehun bites his lip as he gazes into your eyes. he loves every single facial expression you make as he degrades you. “look at you, dripping all over my fingers. cum for me, you whore.”
you moan as he picks up his pace, pumping into you vigorously, while you continue to bounce on his fingers. you groan out his name when you feel yourself cum around him. your forehead falls to his shoulder, unable to keep yourself up. “fuckkkk, you did so well, my little slut.” he pulls out of you and shows you how wet you got. you laugh, embarrassed. your eyes widen when he licks his fingers and sucks your juices clean.
“oh my god.” your mouth is agape. you cant believe this is your first time.
sehun smirks before he has his arm around your waist and flips you onto your bed. you hold yourself up with your elbows as you watch him unbuckle his belt and remove his pants to reveal his very gifted package. you felt yourself stop breathing when he took his shirt off and of course, he had abs.
“ugh, thank you god.” you mutter to yourself as you unashamedly thirst over this man in front of him. sehun grabbed a condom from his back pocket and ripped the packet with his teeth. you felt your heart race at how fucking hot he is. your life doesn’t feel real. he approaches you and tilts his head to the side.
“you’ve never done this have you?” he holds the condom to your face. you gulp and shake your head slowly. “here, ill show you.” he removes his briefs and your breath hitches at how long and girthy he was.
you bite your lip and grab the condom from his hand. he watches you as you place it on his tip and roll it on him. he throws his head back from your touch. “good girl.” he says before tackling your lips once again. his hands shimmy under your dress and take it completely off of you, leaving you in only your underwear.
“youre so fucking gorgeous.” sehun admires you for a minute before your bra is off with a flick of his wrist and your soaked panties are ripped off you. he’s over you in seconds with hunger in his eyes. hes the big bad wolf and youre his willing prey.
he has you squirming under him like hes been dreaming to do, wanting so badly to be fucked by him. his cock teases you, rubbing your clit offensively.
“sehun, please fuck me.” you whine under him, eyes looking up at him, practically begging.
“for a virgin, you’re so goddamn slutty.” he says before he eases himself into you. no matter how prepared you were mentally, you were 110% not ready physically. you arch your back, unprepared by how stretched you were going to feel. sehun holds you down with his hand. “i know baby. we’ll go slow.”
he keeps eye contact with you, gauging your reaction. you bite your lip, unable to contain how good it felt to be filled up by him. sehun watches as you take him whole and smiles. “you did it, baby.” you smile back and he cant help but swoon at how cute you look. he kisses you as he thrusts into you for the first time. he groans when he feels himself hit the end of your walls. you squeal, grabbing onto his shoulders firmly.
“you take me so well.” he practically growls in your ear as continues to thrust into you. your fingers dig into his skin as you’re filled with so much pleasure. sehun picks up his pace, fucking you like this isnt your first time. your legs wrap around his waist so he can go deeper, if thats even possible. he’s hitting your spot repeatedly and you feel yourself go insane with every thrust. you were about to cum and you didn’t want it to end.
you moan as your walls clench around his member, cumming for the second time. sehun groans as he fucks you through your climax. you start to see his stars. “f-fuck im going to come too.” he can barely form a sentence as his hips ram into you over and over again. his lips find yours and his thrusts become erratic as he reaches his end too. you feel the warmth of his cum release into the condom. oh how you wish he had came into you raw.
sehun plops down on top of you and you feel his cock still pulsing inside of you. youre both trying to catch your breath when you catch his eyes and smile, tongue between your teeth. he raises an eyebrow at you when you reach for his cock and slide it out of you. he hisses at the loss of your heat around him.
he watches with curiosity as you wrap your hands around him. his eyes widen when he realizes what youre doing. unfamiliar with it, you unravel the condom the wrong way and have his cum spill all over your bed.
“oops” you giggle.
he tsks at your mistake. “look at what you did.”
“wanna punish me for it?” you bite on your lip.
he looks at you with a blank stare, blinking once, twice, thrice.
“i only brought one.” he says, like that’ll stop him.
“i dont care."
“oh fuck.” he swears before sinking himself back into you, unable to say no to you. sehun falls into the crook of your neck, sighing as he thrusts into you and feels your gummy walls wrap around his cock.
he’s been wanting this ever since he first laid eyes on you at that party and you looked so helpless, pouting to yourself when you couldn’t pick a drink. he wished to see you again, prayed every night that you would somehow show up in his life again.
he can’t believe he has you arching your back under him, just like how he’s imagined it. your breasts bouncing, your brows furrowing, your fingers digging into his skin. it’s all as he pictured it and better.
“sehun, fuck me harder please.”
he almost cums right then and there hearing you speak such filthy words to him. his hips push into you harder, deeper, faster. he can’t wait to fill you up with his cum. you’re moaning his name over and over like a prayer. sehun feels himself slowly lose himself to you, give everything that he is to you.
your walls clench around him tightly and sehun cums as soon as he feels it. he groans in your ear before he showers you with a million kisses on your jaw, your cheek, your forehead and finally your lips.
“i don’t want to leave. so warm.” he mumbles against your lips, tickling you.
“then stay inside.”
sehun feels his cock twitch and watches as your lips curve into that devilish smile.
“oh you’re a fucking freak.”
chananyeol bong: yes yes i am very much a horndog atm. i’m overwhelmed with emotions for oh sehun!!! im so so so proud of him and so happy he’s sharing his beautiful voice with us!!! he gives us this sweet ass song and i give him this filth. i’m sorry oh sehun. a btch is ovulating 😔
you, baekhyun’s stylist and *clears throat* knowledgeable ex, work against the clock to rid him of an untimely boner.
genre: smut | MDNI
wc: 1.1k
warnings: oral sex (m receiving)
a/n: i have returned with something short but sweet this wednesday morning. it was a random idea i had in my drafts since september! enjoy this on your lunch break for a naughty read or leave for after hours ;) - veronica
Music show performances are the real killer of comeback weeks for idols. Waking up at ungodly hours to be transported to the program station and prepped for early morning recordings each day of the week was no easy feat. Day in and day out during this comeback week, Baekhyun found himself with little time before work and no energy after work to practice a very important form of self-care.
By the morning of the fifth day of the week, Baekhyun's morning wood was raging and impossible to ignore. He tried his best to wait it out, hoping it would go down by the time he showed up to the Inkigayo dressing rooms—but there was no luck. After getting dressed in his stage outfit, his boner persisted, confined within his pants but making an obvious bulge at his crotch. Baekhyun knew he didn't have too much time, standby was in just eight minutes. What was he going to do? There was no way he was going to get up in front of the audience and cameras with a noticeable hard-on.
Knock knock.
You, his trusty stylist knock on the door to check on him.
“Hey, you okay in there?” You questioned through the door after it had been double the time as usual that he spends getting dressed.
“Umm, yeah. I'll be out in a second!” He shouted back. Baekhyun panicked.
“I still need to look you over and make any adjustments, Baekhyun,” you cautioned him.
Shit, shit, shit, Baekhyun thought. He closed his eyes and took deep breaths but nothing changed the condition of his very erect member that strained helplessly in his pants.
“Five minutes!” The stage director shouted to the team, voice reaching even the ears of Baekhyun through the door.
You knock once more, urgently. “Baekhyun, are you dressed?”
“Yes, but—”
“Then I'm coming in.” You turned the handle on the door to see Baekhyun, or, at least the back of him, appearing to be perfectly dressed and ready to go. “Baekhyun, let's go. You're on in five.”
He was silent as he kept his back to you and made no movements to turn around and leave. You gently grabbed his shoulder to turn him around. “Baekhyun, what are you—” His body gave a bit from your efforts. He continued to look down and you followed his gaze. Your eyes traveled down his torso to see what was making him so worrisome. The shocking sight of a very large bulge made it’s way into your view. Your eyes widened and you couldn't help but gasp. The all white ensemble did nothing to hide the dimensionality of his tented pants.
Baekhyun quickly turned back around, ashamed of his current state but at least you knew the reason for his strange behavior.
You thought for a moment, weighing different options in your head as the time only dwindled with each unproductive second that passed. You had to do something about it. Closing your eyes, you took a deep exhale before getting onto your knees. Baekhyun turned around and furrowed his eyebrows at your position. He stood frozen, gaping at you in disbelief.
You never thought you’d be here again, kneeling for him, ready to take his excited cock between your lips.
Indeed, you broke up with Baekhyun three months ago. Though your relationship ended, your job persisted. Every day you two still crossed paths and supported each other professionally.
You did this with confidence because, really, you knew he still wanted you; his stolen glances at you were hard to ignore.
“Come on. We don't have long.” You looked up at him expectantly, eyebrow raised as if to challenge him.
“Y/n, this is crazy,” he whisper-screamed. He was waiting for you to get up—for you to end your joke. But it wasn't a joke. The reality of it only became more apparent once he felt you reach for his zipper and unzipped his pants by yourself. Baekhyun blinked in disbelief. It was as if he was dreaming—seeing you on your knees, looking up at him with eager eyes.
“Three minutes!” You both heard the stage director announce boldly. The rest of the team began to knock on the door in concern over the ticking clock.
“We're handling it, guys! There's a wardrobe malfunction. We'll be done in two minutes.” You shouted back to pacify those on the other side of the door.
You hurriedly peeled back the top of his pants and forced down the waistband of his underwear. His cock sprung out ready to play and he let out a sigh of relief at the release of his confines. You notice the pre-cum pearled on his tip and thanked god that it hadn’t permeated through his boxers to his trousers.
You didn't stall. You took his dick into your mouth, immediately bobbing your head and swirling your tongue the way he liked—it was muscle memory.
Indeed, this was not your first time. You've been here before.
“Fuck, I missed this,” Baekhyun breathed out as he took all that you had to give him. You began to take him deeper and deeper down your throat while keeping your tongue flat—that always made him get to the edge quickly.
To give him the final push to cum, you continued to deep throat him while looking up into his eyes that held a lecherous gaze. Baekhyun loved to see the tears that well in your eyes when you take him all the way down your throat. Even more so, he loved to see them spill onto your flushed cheeks. And not to worry, you never missed a beat. You positioned his hand to the back of your head so that he could fuck your face at a faster tempo. With each thrust testing your gag reflex, you felt the tears build until finally, you blinked and they satisfyingly spilled over.
That sight that Baekhyun missed oh so much got him off. Without warning, his cum shot out unrelentingly, copiously. You could tell it had been many days since his last release. You swallowed it all, you know, to keep things neat. He swayed his head back and regained his composure.
“Wow, that was record time,” you commented. Baekhyun smirked before putting himself away to resume his duties.
You left the room with tear-stained cheeks and smudged lip stick. Everyone refrained from asking what happened because finally, the man of the hour was out and ready to get onto the stage with just 30 seconds to spare.
After the show that was successfully carried out, Baekhyun changed out of his stage clothing for his casual hoodie and sweatpants instead. Handing you the outfit neatly folded for you to take back to the company with the rest of the styling materials, he decided to shoot his shot… different from the one from earlier.
“You know... I really missed when we were together, I think—”
“No chance.” You responded shortly. “It was just business.”
↳ summary: Inside the ominous Yeongdongpo police base, the elite team and EXO face a desperate situation as they attempt to escape. Tensions rise as Seo-ah presses Ji-won with difficult questions, forcing her to confront secrets that threaten their fragile trust. EXO is left wondering - what does Level Four really mean? Could they really trust any of them?
↳ wc: 12.5K
↳ progress: Foreword, Chapter 1: The Message, Chapter 2: The Collapse
↳ a/n: mwahahahaha!!
Min-jae’s kit snapped open, the sound tiny but fatal in the dark. He braced a knee against the concrete and unrolled a sodden towel, laying out vials, wipes and a staple gun that glinted in the dark. The others—Ji-won, Ha-yoon, Tae-ho and EXO—huddled in a loose spiral, backs to the wall, faces bleached to a sickly turquoise by the glowstick wedged in a crack above them.
“Everyone. Sit,” he said, not a command, just gravity, and they did. No one argued—not even Ji-won, whose expression, somewhere between collapse and calculation, registered every micro-move in the room.
He started with Tae-ho, tilting the man’s head into the dim light. The cut above his eye was shallow but long, a ragged split that had clotted to a gummy black. Min-jae blotted it with the towel, the smell of blood and alcohol filling the air.
Ha-yoon watched, chewing her lip, then inched closer, hands hovering, useless. “You need stitches, Oppa. I can see the bone.”
“Barely a scratch.” Tae-ho’s smile was a quick flicker.
“Liar,” she whispered, but let it drop.
"It looks worse than it is."
She folded her arms into an exaggerated pout while Min-jae disinfected the wound, pinched it with butterfly strips. He worked in silence, methodical, the way his hands always did even when the rest of him vibrated with nerves.
"What are these things?" she muttered. "Where did they even come from?"
No one answered her. Her voice grew quieter. "… Where are all the people?"
Tae-ho finally spoke. "I don't think those were…things."
Everyone looked up. "They were wearing uniforms… like us. I think I saw a name tag on one of them."
Silence.
Min-jae finished him with a strip of gauze, then turned to Seo-ah.
Seo-ah was slumped against a breaker box, jacket and shirt both torn and stuck to her skin with dried blood. Her eyes didn’t quite focus, and the way her breathing hitched every few seconds told Min-jae more than she ever would.
“Your turn, Han.”
She didn’t move.
He crouched in front of her, pulled her arm out gently. The bite mark was ugly—a crescent of torn skin, the flesh around it mottled purple and yellow. The staples on her back had held, but the flesh under them wanted to give. He pressed around the wound, watched her flinch, gauged the reaction. Bad, but not fatal. He doused the pad with alcohol, then pressed it to the wound until she snarled and tried to pull away.
“Hold still.” His voice didn’t rise. “You want to keep the arm, or not?”
She bit down on something that might have been a laugh.
“So, if they were once people…” she rasped, head tilting to the bite on her arm, “does that mean I am getting the zombie expansion pack?”
Nothing. Not a single laugh.
“Too soon?” She chuckled.
She turned to Baekhyun. This whole time, Baekhyun had been staring, the muscles in his jaw trembling until he realized Seo-ah was watching back. She took a fresh pack of gauze from Min-jae’s kit and flung it at him. He flinched as it hit his face. “You’re next,” she said. She had noticed how he’s been grimacing at the slightest touch, how he kept wincing and holding his palm shut, until she noticed the makeshift napkin-bandage. Baekhyun had no idea she had noticed him.
No one spoke for a long time, just the clockwork of Min-jae’s patching and the low mechanical hum from the emergency lighting, which they found eventually, somewhere far above.
Ji-won unzipped one of the emergency packs she found with careful, deliberate movements. The sound was both too loud and not nearly enough. Inside: six protein bars, eight vacuum-packed bread rolls, a pocketful of bottled water. She counted them twice, as if she’d misread the first time, but the math refused to improve with repetition.
Min-jae’s eyes flicked over the spread. “… Maybe we should ration.” His voice was neutral, the sort of neutrality that only made the deficit seem sharper.
No one reached for the food. Even the EXO members, who sat huddled together like boys at the principal’s office, kept their hands tight in their laps. No one wanted to be the first to admit how bad hunger could get.
Seo-ah shifted against the wall, the breaker box digging into her spine, and reached for a bread roll. A dozen eyes tracked her, as if the simple act of taking food was an affront or a dare. She stood, walked to the far side of the room, and unceremoniously dropped the roll onto Soo-jin’s lap, who hadn’t moved from her post by the vent.
“Had mine already,” Seo-ah said. It was almost convincing.
Soo-jin’s gaze flicked up. “When?”
“Earlier,” Seo-ah said. “The gummies in my vest.”
Soo-jin’s mouth twitched. “They were expired.”
Seo-ah grinned. “Worth the risk.”
The air in the room warped around the exchange, tension stretching and then, impossibly, relaxing by a hair. Within EXO, Baekhyun watched her—the way her left hand trembled, the hollow under her eyes, the way she tried to pass off the pain as nothing.
Ha-yoon, who had been clutching her knees to her chest, tore her own bread roll in half and nudged a piece towards Seo-ah. Seo-ah nudged it right back, expression flat. Ha-yoon pushed it forward again, now with a pleading look. Seo-ah batted it back, the motion more stubborn than playful.
The loop repeated, two, three times, the world’s slowest ping-pong, until Tae-ho, quiet and steady, reached over and split his own roll, dropping half onto each of their laps.
“There,” he said.
Seo-ah stared at it, then at him, then at nothing. Her smile, when it came, was lopsided and a little sad. “You’re my favorite,” she said, voice raw.
“You say that every week.”
“Because it’s true every week.”
A beat. Even EXO smiled, just a little. The fragile peace held.
Min-jae broke it, as always, with practicality. “Eat. You need the calories. You especially,” he pointed at Seo-ah’s arm. “You’ll heal faster.”
Baekhyun watched Seo-ah’s trembling fingers as she took the roll, his own hunger a dull ache beneath the sharper pain in his palm. He’d been quietly tearing his single bread roll into six tiny pieces, a nervous habit from years of group meals where you made sure everyone got something.
“Someone should tell our manager we need a better per diem,” Baekhyun muttered, not looking up from his task. His voice was too quiet, meant only for the members circled around him, but it landed in the new silence anyway. He didn’t flinch when Sehun elbowed him lightly in the ribs.
Ji-won exhaled. She took the last roll, broke it in half, and gave the bigger piece to Ha-yoon, who looked like she might cry from gratitude or exhaustion or both.
Across the circle, Chanyeol nudged his own half-eaten portion toward Kai, who shook his head once, sharply. A silent argument passed between them in glances until Suho reached over and split his roll three ways, pressing a piece into each of their hands. “Eat,” he said, his voice imitating Min-jae’s flat command, and they did.
They ate in silence, bread sticking to the roofs of their mouths. Every bite was a relief.
The introductions came only after everyone had eaten.
Ji-won set down the empty wrapper in her hand and straightened. The room came to attention without being asked. “We haven’t introduced ourselves properly.” No preamble, no softening. “Kim Ji-won. Captain of the Elite Special Missions Squad. We operate under a classified mandate—direct authorization from the highest level of national security. Standard chain of command doesn’t apply to us. We go where no one else is cleared to go.” She let that settle.
She gestured down the line. “You’ve already met Han Seo-ah, our point operative. Close-quarters, threat assessment, extraction.” Seo-ah was examining the gauze on her arm and didn’t look up. “Choi Tae-ho, tactical coordination and field command.” Tae-ho gave a nod that was almost imperceptible. “Kang Ha-yoon, intelligence and comms.” Ha-yoon offered a small, almost too cheerful, wave. “Yoo Min-jae, field medic.” Min-jae had already returned to cataloguing the kit. “Moon Soo-jin, recon and surveillance.” Soo-jin, still at her post by the vent, acknowledged this with nothing at all.
Across the supply room, EXO had gone very quiet. Chanyeol’s eyes moved over each of them in turn—the torn gear, the dried blood, the economy of movement that came from people who had done this before and expected to do it again. Something behind his expression did the math and settled on an answer.
“And you?” Ji-won asked.
Suho rose. He dusted his palms on his jeans out of habit, then seemed to realize how strange the gesture was, and shook her hand anyway. “Kim Junmyeon. Most people know me as Suho.” A brief pause. “We’re EXO.” He said it the way you’d say it to someone who might not know, which was the only honest way to say it right now. He introduced them left to right, each name landing in the silence. “Lay—Yixing—isn’t with us. He was in China when—” He stopped. Started again. “We haven’t heard from him…” The small fake laugh he attempted didn’t land anywhere.
The unfinished sentence sat in the room with everything else.
Chen, or Jongdae as he referred to himself, was the first to speak after. “When you say classified mandate—” He stopped, reformulated. “Is there a command structure still running somewhere? Does anyone above you know what’s happening?”
Ji-won looked at him steadily. “There was a command structure. We lost uplink contact within the first hour.”
Kai absorbed this with his eyes fixed on the middle distance. Beside him, Sehun’s hands had gone still in his lap.
“Other units,” Xiumin said. Not quite a question. He had the focused, unhurried quality of someone who had already prepared himself for the answer. “Are there others deployed right now?”
“There should be other units active in the city, however…” Ji-won said. “We haven’t been able to contact any of them either.”
Chen exhaled through his nose, a short, controlled sound. D.O just murmured, his gaze moved to Seo-ah’s arm, then back to the floor, and stayed there. Baekhyun turned his bread roll over in his fingers and said nothing, which was, for Baekhyun, its own kind of answer.
The silence that followed had a rough texture to it.
Ji-won was the one who dissolved it, without meaning to. “I know who you are, for what it’s worth,” she said, offhanded, the way you’d mention the weather.
The members blinked. A few of them exchanged glances—the particular glance that meant: do not make this weird.
“I liked your debut album,” she continued, with the flat certainty of someone stating a fact they had no reason to doubt.
A beat.
Baekhyun turned to look at her fully for the first time. “... Captain.” Something in his voice had gone fragile at the edges. “That was fourteen years ago.”
Seo-ah exhaled a laugh that clearly hurt her. She pressed her forearm to her ribs anyway. “She said it like she was complimenting their recent work.”
“Wasn’t it recent?” Ji-won said. The furrow in her brow was genuine.
Ha-yoon made a sound of pure suffering and pressed her face into Tae-ho’s shoulder. “Unnie, please…”
Seo-ah raised her good arm across the circle. Ha-yoon met it. The high-five echoed off the concrete walls, sharp and ridiculous.
Chanyeol laughed before he could stop himself—a short, involuntary thing. He pressed his fist to his mouth. It didn’t help. Across from him, even D.O’s expression had shifted by a fraction, the corner of his mouth doing something against his will.
Ji-won looked around at all of them, faintly wounded.
The room didn’t become lighter, exactly. But something that had been pulled very taut went slack by one degree, and for a moment the dark felt less total than it had.
As the minutes passed, the laughter faded away, wrung dry by the stale darkness. Silence settled, heavy as concrete, until the talk spun back to its origin: the Samsung tower.
Seo-ah pressed her back against the cool wall, knees drawn up, arms locked around them. In the low light she seemed even smaller, her edges blurring into shadow. “When I got there,” she said, voice flat, almost mechanical, “there were people. Everywhere.” She let the word hang like a stone.
“They were jumping,” she added, voice rough with memory. “From the fifteenth floor.” Each breath came with a soft grunt, as if pain had taken root in her chest. “I tried to shout, but they didn’t stop.”
Across the room, Ha-yoon’s jaw tightened. She touched her wrist, as if reading a pulse she couldn’t trust. “But there weren’t any bodies,” she said, slow and firm. “Not outside.”
Seo-ah’s head lifted. “What?”
“When we reached the site there were no bodies,” Ha-yoon repeated. Her voice wavered at the edges, as though she doubted her own words. She shot a glance to Soo-jin and the others for confirmation.
Silence answered. Even the boys—Tae-ho and Min-jae—hovering near the stacked crates, were frozen.
Seo-ah frowned, lines creasing her forehead. “That’s not—” She stared at her hands, searching them for answers. “I saw them hit the ground. I heard them hit the ground…”
Her voice trailed off. The only sound was Tae-ho shifting to brace himself, and the pulse of the emergency lights overhead.
Min-jae’s hand hovered in midair, then fell. “The sign came down from afar,” he muttered. “We watched it detach. But after—nothing.”
Tae-ho rubbed the back of his neck. “I walked the perimeter twice. No skid marks, no trails.” His voice wavered. “If they fell, where did they go?”
Questions spiraled in Seo-ah’s mind. Had her adrenaline been so high she hallucinated? Or did something unthinkable devour the bodies? Her heart hammered. “They landed like… like sacks of meat.”
A long beat.
Ha-yoon broke the tension. “Did anyone check the alley behind the east entrance?”
Soo-jin shook her head. “We searched. It was empty.”
Ji-won watched them all, chest tight with dread. In her head, a question burned-Did we see the same world? She tried to steady her voice. “We write exactly what we observed. No spin, no theories. Full report.”
The chill in the cramped supply room deepened. Seo-ah pulled her knees even tighter. Fear ricocheted through her veins, but she forced a nod. The others followed suit, though their eyes flicked around in confusion and disbelief.
She waited until the talk moved on—rations, batteries, a half-formed plan for morning—before she let herself press her forehead to her knees, feeling the bruise beneath the skin, the way her body still remembered the impact. She wondered if it would be like this, if the world would keep emptying itself out, taking bits of her with it.
Inside each of them, a storm raged—doubt, terror, guilt. They had witnessed something impossible. And now, alone in the shadows, they weren’t sure they could trust even themselves.
Ji-won couldn’t tell if ten minutes or an hour had passed. She pressed her palms into her temples, head bowed over the kit’s chaos of blood-soaked gauze and crumpled wrappers. The image of those stitched-shut eyes—eyes that might once have been human—kept replaying in her mind. And the dreaded question that lingered but no one dared ask yet.
She forced herself upright. The squad huddled in the flickering glow of the overhead lamp, silent. Finally, she broke it. “Min-jae,” her voice cracked, “the bite—could it be viral? Like those outbreak films?” She flinched at her own words. “Some kind of infection?”
Min-jae’s silence hit her chest like a bullet. He adjusted his glasses—knuckles black with dried ooze—then stared at Seo-ah’s arm, the ragged edges of the wound, the angry bite pattern again. For as long as she’d known him, the man had never admitted, not once, to not knowing the answer.
Twelve hours ago he’d have scoffed. Now he dared only whisper, “Honestly? I don’t know.” He admitted at last. “This isn’t in any papers I’ve read. Even if I analyze Ha-yoon’s sample, I need a full lab—days, minimum. And by then…” He let the thought hang.
Tae-ho’s voice trembled. “Days? Will it spread?”
Ha-yoon crossed her arms, defiant. “What if it doesn’t? I mean—maybe she’s fine.”
Baekhyun sat frozen, trying not to think what he’d do if she snapped. His mind immediately went to the worst-case scenarios from every zombie flick he’d ever seen, and cried out in his mind, Don’t let it be real. Could he pull the trigger? He didn’t know.
Seo-ah laughed—a brittle, hollow sound. “Great. So if I go rabid, someone’s gotta put me down, right?” She winked at Tae-ho. Her bravado was a shield. Baekhyun caught its tremor.
Ji-won shot her a flat look. “Let’s not joke.”
Seo-ah shrugged. “Just trying to keep us from panicking.” Her smile wavered. “Besides, I’d hate to miss dinner.”
Ha-yoon’s eyes darted to the hallway. “We should—”
Seo-ah cut her off, pushing to her feet. Her legs bowed, nearly giving out, but she masked it by stretching high above her head. Then she dropped her arms. “I’ll stay in the storeroom. Out of the way.”
Chanyeol, sitting at the back, paled. He pressed a hand to his mouth, focusing on not getting sick.
Seo-ah grabbed the only working flashlight, its beam flickered like a dying heartbeat.
Before she could step out, Ji-won caught her by the wrist. “Don’t be a hero,” she said, and the words landed heavier than any order.
“Never was one,” she replied, forcing a shrug, twisting her fingers free. She brushed hair from her face. “Just… Don't wake me if I start craving brains.” Her smile wavered. She tossed a wink over her shoulder and limped away.
Chanyeol shivered. “Is this actually happening?”
“I don’t know,” Baekhyun whispered to himself, but loud enough for Tae-ho to hear. “I don’t know anything anymore.”
Tae-ho’s jaw clenched.
Seo-ah clicked the storeroom door shut behind her. The lock snapped. The beam swung across their faces—Ji-won’s impassive, Min-jae’s haunted, Ha-yoon’s pinched, Tae-ho’s pale. Baekhyun’s chest tightened; he felt like the last living soul in a graveyard.
A hush smothered the group. Ji-won wanted to say something, anything, but the right words were a luxury she had never learned. She watched the closed door and counted her own pulse, slow and hard. If anyone self-isolated at the first sign of trouble, of course it would be Seo-ah. The impulse to protect, inverted into the instinct to quarantine.
“She’ll be fine,” Ha-yoon murmured, as if the volume of the thought might make it more true.
Min-jae slipped the kit into his pocket, eyes on the dark door. “We coordinate, quarantine, and do what we can,” he said. His voice was tight, brittle. “Unfortunately, time’s not on our side.”
Ji-won nodded once. No more words left. They turned away from the storeroom, each carrying their fear like a loaded gun—ready for whatever came next.
Several hours had slipped by, time turning slurry with exhaustion and the slow creep of dread. The painkillers thinned to a memory—Seo-ah felt the bite’s ache radiate, rhythmic as her pulse, a new center of gravity in her arm. She imagined the blackness inside her, slow as ink dispersing in water, and for a while she counted each breath just to prove she could.
Seo-ah sat against the storeroom wall, jaw clenched. She curled tighter, an animal trying to shield itself, trying to hide the voices coming from within, as another wave of pain rippled across her back.
Min-jae’s footsteps scuffed the concrete and found her.
“Come here,” he said through the door.
She groaned dramatically. Then clicked the door open.
He knelt beside her but didn’t bother with small talk, just swabbed her skin with icy disinfectant. She watched his hands, the steady way he handled the needle, the way he kept his own injury hidden from her. She wondered if he was afraid he’d catch whatever it was she had, or if he was just being a martyr in case she went feral.
His gaze flicked up. “Ready?”
She nodded, jaw locked. The syringe slid in—sharp pinch, burning blaze, then emptiness. She could handle the needle. What she couldn’t handle was the room’s slow tilt, the way everyone recoiled, eyes averted, hands hovering as if she might strike.
A brittle laugh tore out of her. “What now? You all scared of me?” She raised her uninjured hand. “Still here.”
Silence pressed in, thick and unyielding.
“If I turn into one of those things,” she said, voice thick and low, eyes sweeping their averted faces, “would any of you actually kill me?” She watched their jaws set but no one volunteered. “Don’t make me haunt you out of spite.”
Still nothing.
Her eyes found Soo-jin by the vent, rifle resting across her knees. “Soo-jin-ah,” she said, voice softening despite her trembling insides. “I can count on you, right?” She tried for a smile.
Soo-jin’s fingers tightened on the stock, brows knitting in conflict.
Seo-ah laughed again—this time the sound stuck in her chest. “Oh, come on.” She swallowed. “Don’t make me do it myself,” she finished, imagining the storeroom door barred from the outside, her body seized by something alien. “If it comes to that…”
Min-jae knelt by her leg, wrapping the wound. The antiseptic burned, but the sting was clean, a lucid anchor. She savored it.
When he withdrew, Seo-ah leaned her head against the cold cinderblock, letting the dull ache pool until it morphed into something she could name: rage, fear, doubt.
Footsteps skittered outside. Through the doorway, Ji-won appeared, silhouette sharp against the flickering light. Seo-ah stayed still, eyes flat.
Ji-won stepped in cautiously, as if facing a caged beast. She said nothing.
Seo-ah let the silence stretch. Then, voice thin and steady, “I just want to know one thing.”
Ji-won held her gaze, unblinking.
Seo-ah’s words slid out thin and even, a knife, not a plea. “What am I fighting?”
Seo-ah had suspected something was off the moment the mission briefing ended—her gut twisted like barbed wire, but there’d never been the right moment to voice it. Now, leaning against the chipped concrete wall, her doubts spilled out.
The words hung between them, brittle and precise. Ji-won’s face didn’t betray a flicker, yet Seo-ah saw the subtle tightening at her jaw, the sliver of hesitation in her eyes. She’d watched Ji-won construct lies before, and she knew the machinery of deception whirring just beneath the surface.
“You know me,” Seo-ah pressed, voice low but carrying. “If you asked me to walk through fire, I’d do it—ten times over. But I need something, too.” Her laugh was thin, almost a whisper. “I need to know why.”
Her eyes drilled into Ji-won’s, as though sheer will could crack open the truth.
“So tell me.” Pain flared up her arm, but Seo-ah curled her fingers white-knuckled around her sleeve. “What are we fighting?”
Ji-won inhaled slowly, as if every breath might betray her. Still—silence.
From the corner of her eye, Seo-ah caught Min-jae’s stiff shoulders and Ha-yoon’s bated breath. The rest of EXO had recoiled, folding inward, as if forcing themselves to disappear.
With a low timbre that rattled the empty space, Seo-ah filled the silence herself. “We’ve done some shit for this country. Stuff the brass would never admit. No questions asked. We did it together.” She counted the years, each scar a shared ghost. “We’ve seen things no one should ever see.”
She paused, letting the weight settle. “Now… I’m not scared of dying.” She spoke the truth. “But if I’m dying, I want to know why. Because I refuse to be someone’s lab rat— some rich fuck’s sanctified science project.”
The words struck home. Ji-won’s eyes glimmered; a tremor ran through her, but her face held.
Seo-ah slid back against the concrete wall, head resting heavy. She spoke softer now, cautious. “Is this like Hongdae?” Her voice was an almost-whisper.
Ji-won’s gaze snapped up— sharp as a pistol shot.
Seo-ah watched the ripple. The way every head twitched at the name, the place. Min-jae’s shoulders stiffened so hard his breath hitched, Ha-yoon’s fingers twisted the hem of her jacket, Soo-jin’s eyes darted between Seo-ah and Ji-won, lips parted. The Hongdae Incident—a sealed-off memory so grim no one dared discuss it at reunions. EXO’s faces went pale. Guilt and fear flickered in their eyes.
She felt cold satisfaction at having scored a hit, at seeing Ji-won's grip clench hard enough to blanch bone. She’d hit bullseye.
"Yeah, that's what I thought," she said, softer, then let her head thump back on the wall. “You knew this was Level Four before the call came in. Is that why you pulled in me and Soo-jin?”
Before Ji-won could answer, Tae-ho’s voice cracked out, “Seo-ah—” he said, half-plea, half-command.
She cut him off, tense. “They didn’t warn us then, did they? Sent us in blind— rats in a maze, no exit.” Her injured arm throbbed in sync with the memory. “Half our team never came out. And what did Command say?”
Her lip curled. “Operational loss.”
Ji-won’s glare could’ve sliced steel, but Seo-ah met it without flinching. “So,” she said, pushing herself upright on her good arm, “what are we now? Expendable?”
“HAN SEO-AH!” Tae-ho’s roar crashed through the corridor.
Everything snapped silent.
His voice cracked the tension like thunder. EXO shrank further into the corners, eyes cast downward, burdened by the truth finally spoken aloud. Minseok’s heartbeat thudded loud in his ears, Suho swallowed past his lumped throat, Sehun blinked back sudden tears. They exchanged hollow looks—none daring to breathe too loud, as if the sound might shatter the fragile web of trust. They felt guilty for intruding on this raw moment, yet their own minds raced: What does Level Four really mean? How many others have died without knowing why? Could they trust Ji-won—or any of them—ever again?
Seo-ah closed her eyes, inhaled one slow, steady breath. Then, quieter than before,“… Sorry.”
She tugged her cap low and let her body slide down the wall, the fight drained from her limbs. Around her, EXO sat in the aftermath, minds racing with the secret now laid bare—haunted by the question: if they’d been sent in blind, what else had they been kept from seeing?
Ji-won stood stone-silent, every muscle in her jaw locked tight. Around them, the low hum of the generator trembled against the walls—the only witness to the tension choking the room.
Min-jae bent over Seo-ah’s bite, swathing it in white gauze with the same gentle precision he always showed. When he finished, he met Ji-won’s eyes—no joke, no levity—just an unspoken question hanging between them.
“Min-jae, maybe just inject poison and save everyone the trouble,” Seo-ah said, loud enough to bounce off the dark walls. The words hung in the air, rancid and unwelcome.
Min-jae flicked her head and half-smiled—his version of comfort—and let the empty syringe clink into the kit. The sound echoed. He lingered, watching Seo-ah struggle to hold her anger in check, then reached for the next syringe.
They all waited. EXO sat against the walls, backs drooping. Chanyeol tapping his boot, eyes darting to the cracked windows, Kyungsoo fiddling with an empty gauze pack as if it might answer all their doubts, Jongdae’s fingers drumming, every beat a question: Why are we here? Could we even survive without each other? What had happened to their families outside this base? Would they ever get home?
Finally, Ji-won spoke.
“My knowledge is no better than yours.” Her voice was flat, like a floorboard creaking under a hundred pounds of guilt. “This morning— 03:12 a.m.— I got a call from Command. Level Four. We were ordered to report to Seongnam Base. That’s all I knew.”
No one moved. The squad waited for more truth.
She didn’t mention the stench of slaughter that had greeted her before the convoy even hit Myeong-dong. She scanned every face in the circle—Min-jae’s nervous knuckles, Ha-yoon’s trembling breath, the others’ silent dread— as if apologizing for not having answers she didn’t possess. But Ji-won said nothing else. Instead, she swept her gaze across the dark panes lining the wall, at Seo-ah’s hollow eyes, at the looming questions they all shared and dared not voice.
“Everything after that…” Her hand gestured vaguely at the pain, at the bite, at the fear pressing in on them. “…is as new to me as it is to all of you.”
Min-jae hovered over the next syringe, thumb poised on the plunger, ready anyone flinched the wrong way.
Seo-ah looked at Ji-won. Wanted to speak—wanted to tear a hole in this lie—but instead she met Ji-won’s steady gaze. Ji-won looked at Min-jae, then at Seo-ah, and gave a single nod. “Let her go.”
“But—” Min-jae said. He’d already wrapped the wound, but his hand lingered just above her shoulder.
“For now,” Ji-won cut in. “If she turns… I’ll do it myself.”
Something hot and animal flared behind Seo-ah’s eyes. She met Ji-won’s stare, nodded once, then forced herself to stand. Every movement seemed to shout she didn’t belong here anymore. She shrugged on her ruined jacket as if that one gesture proved she still had somewhere to be. “I’ll be out,” she said, glancing toward Ji-won, voice low and hollow. “Don’t want to be an inconvenience.”
“Seo-ah-ya!” Ha-yoon scrambled to her knees, almost toppling a box of IV bags. “Wait—”
Ji-won caught Ha-yoon’s wrist with iron calm. “Leave her.” The single sentence was final as a gunshot.
Ha-yoon froze, mouth open, then slumped back against a crate. She stared at Ji-won, bewildered.
Ji-won pressed two fingers to the bridge of her nose—someone who knew pain could be endured, if not erased.
“I’ll take first watch,” she told the silent circle. “The rest of you, sleep if you can.”
She turned and walked out without waiting for answers.
Once the hatch closed, the tension twisted tighter. In the gloom, EXO shifted, each lost in a private storm.
Ha-yoon exhaled dramatically at Tae-ho. “Oppa! Seriously… can you handle the lot?” Her tone strained between exasperation and humor, but everyone felt the edge of something darker. She pressed a quick kiss to his lips—soft, distracted—and slipped out to follow Ji-won, shoulders bunched as if bracing for the worst.
Sehun’s brow shot up. “Did she just—?”
Tae-ho only nodded, but his eyes stayed fixed at the thin streak of blood Seo-ah left, dark red against the concrete floor under the emergency light’s flicker.
An uneasy hush settled. Min-jae exhaled, rubbing his temples. “She needed rest, but that attitude…” he said, but even as he spoke, his voice trembled with doubt. “She’s always pushing herself. What if this time she goes too far?” He glanced at the others, their tired faces mirroring his concern, then cleared his throat and clicked his medical kit shut. “Well, I’m the medic here. If anyone’s running a fever, can’t sleep, or suddenly decides to go full zombie…” He snapped his kit shut. “… please let me know.”
Minutes ticked by before Min-jae’s voice cracked again, sharper this time. “You know what scares me? Watching two people snap at each other like that— and knowing you’ll never have it. You can’t even tell if it’s love or hate.” He aimed a rueful half-smile at Tae-ho. “Whatever it is.”
Tae-ho stretched his shoulders and asked without heat, “You thinking about your ex again?” It sounded like a stale in-joke, but Baekhyun saw the flicker in Tae-ho’s eyes—he’d heard that tone before.
Baekhyun braced for Min-jae’s usual snark, but the medic only clenched his jaw, eyes fixed on the blood-stained gauze in his hand.
Baekhyun swallowed, voice low, “I honestly thought she’d get herself shot with that attitude.” He flinched at the bluntness of it, but the question hung in the air.
Tae-ho exhaled. “She probably thought that too. So did we.” He tilted his head toward the ceiling pipes, veins of metal overhead. “Without Ji-won watching her back, she’d be toast. They’ve been through worse—together.”
Baekhyun bit his lip. “Sounds like blind faith.”
“More like absolute certainty,” Tae-ho said softly. “Seo-ah only takes that tone with someone she knows will stay.”
He flicked a thumb toward Baekhyun’s shoulder—toward the door where Ji-won had gone. “Those two are all that’s left of their old unit. Them and Soo-jin over there.”
“They met as teens,” Tae-ho continued, voice low. “Survived missions that broke people. Buried friends together. Time and again, they pulled each other back from the edge.” He laced his fingers around his knee. “They spar like cats—stubborn, screeching. But if one vanished, the other would rip this place apart looking.”
Baekhyun stared at his knees, uneasy. “Then why let her go first?”
Tae-ho met his gaze. “Because forcing her would shatter that bond. They’ve nothing left if we mess with it—even for their own good.”
The words settled, heavy. Baekhyun imagined someone who’d tear the world apart for you. It felt impossible.
A soft cough at the door. Ha-yoon edged in, eyes wide with concern.
“Captain’s out in the hallway,” she whispered. “Just sitting there. And Seo-ah’s nowhere to be found.” Her voice trembled between humor and panic, and nobody dared guess which would come next.
The hours that followed had a hollow quality—even in the thin, blinding light of the emergency lantern. Baekhyun drifted on the edge of sleep, fingers fidgeting with the hem of his borrowed jacket, as if he could undo the day’s ugliness one loose thread at a time. The storeroom shrank to the sound of dull breathing and the distant click of Ha-yoon’s comms, punctuated every so often by Min-jae’s gentle, methodical rummaging through the med kit. D.O. loitered nearest Min-jae, shadowing his every move, his own hands busy with folding, organizing, cleaning—as if tidiness could banish what waited outside.
There was a hush to everything now, a kind of mutual agreement not to speak unless necessary. Xiumin, Suho, and Kai had claimed arranging makeshift beds for everyone, a fortress of shipping blankets and torn cardboard.
Baekhyun let his own head loll back, feeling every vertebra in his neck, and tried to imagine tomorrow. The notion felt obscene, like trying to forecast weather on a dead planet. He closed his eyes, but every time he drifted, he felt the soft jolt of Tae-ho jerking next to him—another nightmare, another return from the bloodier side of memory.
The first rays of sunlight crept through the broken ventilation shafts, turning the floating dust into ribbons of gold. For a fleeting moment the maintenance floor looked almost peaceful.
Outside the window, the city glowed as if the night had never happened. Neon crawled up the sides of buildings and died against the sky. Down below, the world was a hush of morning—Seoul before the day’s engines started, before the heat settled in, before anyone had a chance to remember what had been taken from them. In those first moments after dawn, even the monsters seemed to keep their distance.
Baekhyun woke shivering, not from cold but from the kind of dream that left teeth marks. At first, he couldn't tell what had woken him. The others were still arranged where they'd fallen: Min-jae with his chin on his chest, Ha-yoon curled fetal position, head on Tae-ho’s lap, D.O. propped against a crate like a marionette with cut strings.
He listened. Nothing. Not even the static from Ha-yoon’s comms, which had died with the night. He let his head thud back against the wall and waited for his heart to catch up. Through the dust, the morning rays painted stripes onto the floor, bright enough to blind if you stared long enough. He blinked, and the afterimage was a memory of hands gripping his shoulders, shaking him out of sleep.
At the far corner of the room, Baekhyun spotted the shape of Soo-jin slouched against a pillar, the battered stock of her rifle wedged beneath her chin. Her chest rose and fell in a slow, stubborn rhythm. He wasn't sure if she’d slept at all. Her eyes never really closed, not fully. Instead, she drifted on the edge of waking, a sentry in a world where staying awake meant staying alive. She looked really young for someone in her role.
The rest of them—EXO, the famous, the untouchable—had abandoned all pretenses of dignity. Seven grown men fused into one tangle of limbs, shoulders pressed tight, some cradling others, all of it desperate, childlike. Sehun had commandeered two jackets, rolled up as a makeshift pillow under his head. Chanyeol sprawled out full length, one leg thrown over Jongin, whose face was half-buried in the crook of Suho’s arm.
They looked less like survivors and more like a pile of casualties, resting in a heap until someone came to tag their toes. Baekhyun’s own body had become numb, first from exhaustion, then from the cold that seeped up through the concrete. He held onto the sensation just to prove he hadn’t slipped out of awareness. Not yet.
Only Ji-won moved, a slow pan of her rifle toward the door, as if expecting the next thing to arrive would be human-shaped and hungry.
Ji-won was already awake. Not that she'd slept. She remained seated against the cold concrete wall exactly where she'd taken first watch hours ago, rifle resting across her lap. The untouched bottle of water she'd left beside the door the previous night was gone. She didn't know whether that made her feel better or worse.
She stood up to watch out the window, the muzzle of her rifle just brushing the glass, eyes fixed on the skyline. The captain’s silhouette was sharp enough to cut, but even from across the room, Baekhyun saw her shoulders quiver, minutely. Yesterday, they'd been soldiers. The day before, legends. Now, they were a handful of strangers, failing to keep each other warm.
He watched Ji-won break her stare, gaze falling on the heap of idol bodies. She looked at them with something like awe, but stripped of all sweetness. If she blinked, it was to keep her eyes from burning. If she exhaled, it was to keep from making a sound.
Ji-won waited, letting the silence plaster over every crack in her armor. On the floor, Tae-ho’s breathing guttered and caught, the prelude to a speech.
“She’s not back yet,” he said.
Ji-won didn't look away from the doorway. "No."
Silence settled between them. After a while, Tae-ho rubbed a tired hand over his face. "You should've gone after her."
Ji-won's expression barely changed. "And said what?"
Tae-ho didn't answer immediately. The corners of his mouth lifted into a weary smile. "I don't know. You've always been better at that part."
Ji-won let out the smallest huff of air. "You've known Han Seo-ah almost as long as I have. You know exactly what would've happened."
A quiet chuckle escaped Tae-ho. "She would've yelled."
"Mhm."
"Probably walked away."
"Mhm."
"Then come back five minutes later pretending nothing happened."
For the first time that morning Ji-won smiled. "Mm-hmm"
Another silence.
Then Tae-ho looked toward the doorway again. "She'll be back."
Not because he believed it. It was because he knew her. Han Seo-ah always wandered off. But she never left them behind.
Never.
A faint shuffle sounded from the hall. Baekhyun’s breath snagged in his throat. Something in it was familiar, bone-deep. He saw Ji-won jerk her head up. The entire nest of bodies snapped awake, EXO’s famed choreography traded for graceless chaos—knees thudding, limbs tangling, several of them yelping as they collided in the scramble to get upright.
“What—?”
“Move—!”
“My leg—shit—”
“Who’s under me?”
Baekhyun reached for the wall, used it to lever himself up, only to be bowled over by a panicked Sehun. The barrel of Soo-jin’s rifle was already trained on the door, finger knuckle-white on the trigger.
He heard someone—Chanyeol, probably—bang his head and curse, muffled.
Then a shadow passed the frosted glass, lingering. A voice, hoarse but unmistakable, drifted through, "Morning."
The door opened a crack. Seo-ah’s face appeared, pale and smudged with something that looked like engine grease, lips parted around a mouthful of food. She let the door swing wide, stepped in with a nonchalance that bordered on contempt for her own mortality.
She stepped in, and the room went still. Every breath hitched. Eyes tracked her, waiting for a snarl, for her pupils to dilate into something not human. Her movements were too casual, too loose—the kind of ease that felt like a disguise. Was this still Seo-ah? Or had something else come back wearing her skin?
She wore that bloodstained jacket, the wrong size, sleeves rolled twice to show her wrists. Over one shoulder, a battered backpack sagged with the weight of things recently looted. She chewed, swallowed, and assessed the weapons aimed at her with only the faintest twitch of amusement.
No one lowered their guns.
"Well." She held up the half-eaten protein bar she'd found somewhere. "I was going to offer breakfast."
Baekhyun’s pulse stuttered in relief. He recognized the cadence, the way she spat the words like a challenge. He felt something like awe, but the raw kind—admiration cut with fear. Seo-ah was the kind of person who could make an entrance even as a corpse.
"Tough crowd." She took a last bite of her protein bar and tossed the rest at Soo-jin’s boots.
No one spoke. They just stared, the silence a vacuum. Across the room, Tae-ho caught Ji-won’s eye. The corner of her mouth moved, barely. His did too.
Seo-ah slung the backpack onto the nearest crate, where it thudded with the promise of salvage. She rummaged with one hand and, without looking, tossed a pack of batteries in Ha-yoon’s direction. “For your comms. Or your laser pointer. Whatever gets you through the night.”
Ha-yoon caught it, blinking, as if she’d forgotten how to move.
“Next,” Seo-ah announced. She fished out a tangle of cable ties—bright yellow, industrial strength—and lobbed them toward Min-jae. “Restraints. Or arts and crafts. No judgment.”
Min-jae let them hit the floor, face unreadable.
She produced a crowbar next, hefting it with an exaggerated grunt. Seo-ah’s knuckles whitened around the crowbar’s taped handle. She dropped it on the crate, where it landed with a satisfying metallic thunk. Finally, a tool worth the weight. Underneath, she placed a folded paper map, edges wrinkled, the kind only government offices still printed.
Ji-won unspooled the map, pressing it flat with her palm. The city grid shimmered in red and blue highlighter, dotted with Xs and frantic notations. Seo-ah caught Ji-won’s eye, then flicked her gaze to the map’s center. Neither apologized.
“I wouldn’t use the main staircase,” Seo-ah said. Her voice was casual, almost bored, as if she were suggesting a quicker route to the cafeteria. She could feel the doubt in the room, a cold draft at her back, but she pushed on. “It’s not worth it.”
Half the room looked up. She crouched beside the map, tracing a finger down the ghost-outline of the Police Command base. “There are maintenance tunnels. They run all the way from here to the next block. But—” She hesitated, jaw flexing. “They’re flooded. Knee, maybe thigh-high. Not worth the risk unless you like swimming in darkness.”
Ha-yoon stared, lips parted as if she might protest, but no sound came.
Ji-won tapped the sheet. “What about the elevator? Service lifts?”
“They’re out,” Seo-ah said. “Power’s cut on every upper floor. But if you’re desperate, the emergency ladders are still clear. Nobody’s posted up there yet.”
“Yet?” Suho echoed. His voice quivered.
“They’ve moved.” Seo-ah didn’t look at him, or at anyone. Just the map. “All of them. They’re on the lower floors now.”
Ji-won leaned in. “Moved?”
“Mostly in the lobby. Parking. Some outside. They’re not hunting. Just—” Seo-ah’s hand hovered over the building outline, as if feeling heat radiate from the paper. “Standing there. Kind of waiting. Like…” She groped for a word, then let it drop. “Like they’re saving their spot in line.”
Baekhyun felt a ripple move through the tangle of bodies behind him. A rustle of fear, or maybe anticipation.
Ha-yoon’s voice was small. “So they’re gone?”
Seo-ah finally looked up, and for a moment, Baekhyun saw nothing in her eyes but the memory of what she’d just returned from. “No,” she said. “More like…gathering.”
No one spoke. The sound of breathing went thin and sharp, as if the air had turned to glass.
“And the ones we dropped?” Seo-ah asked, but the question was rhetorical.
Baekhyun cleared his throat. “Dead?” he said, hopeful.
She turned to him, a slow, deliberate pivot. “No. Still there. Some are crawling now, but…” She shrugged, like it was a math equation nobody liked the answer to.
He swallowed, hard. “Alive.”
“Parts of them,” Seo-ah corrected. “Slower than before. Missing chunks. One was dragging a leg behind, grinding it into the floor.” A pause. “But it was moving.”
Min-jae let out a breath, a razor slice of sound. “So… the headshots didn’t work?”
Seo-ah shook her head. Ji-won watched Seo-ah as if the right angle might let her see beneath the skin. The question—how are you feeling?—came so softly that it half-missed its mark, ricocheting off the edge of a joke.
Seo-ah blinked, mouth already prepping a retort, then shrugged with one shoulder. “Still alive.”
It was supposed to land lighter than it did. Ji-won’s lips didn’t move. Her gaze flickered, despite herself, toward the sleeve where Seo-ah’s arm was exposed, the fabric just a shade too dark over the wound.
Seo-ah set her jaw. “It’s not worse.” She waited, a heartbeat. “Yet.”
Ji-won gave the barest nod, as if the word itself were a fragile thing she’d cradle, rather than test.
Seo-ah tapped the map, her fingertip making a new circle near the building’s edge. “We don’t have to go through the main floor. There’s an old sewage pipe along the west wall—bolted on.” She scanned the room, measuring how ready they looked for bad news. “It’s a drop though. Eighty feet, maybe more. But we can use the cable ties, and that broken ladder.”
Soo-jin pressed her mouth flat, eyes jumpy. “You sure it isn’t blocked?”
“Not unless mold counts,” Seo-ah said. She paused, then corrected herself, softer, “It’s clear.”
Baekhyun exhaled. “Eighty feet is… reassuring.”
Seo-ah ignored him, drawing a second line on the map. “Tae-ho can lower the group. I’ll go first. Soo-jin, you cover from up top. Ji-won comes down last.”
If there was a protest, no one voiced it, not even Ji-won. It was that kind of plan—brutal, simple, impossible to argue with.
Only when the logistics were splayed out like an autopsy did Seo-ah hesitate. Just a split second, but enough for even the sleepy ones to notice.
“My only concern,” she said, and her eyes flicked to the heap of EXO, “is them.”
The room followed her gaze.
Baekhyun felt the weight of her words settle with all the mercy of a slab dropped from a rooftop. It was not an accusation, but a diagnosis. He could sense every detail in his bones. They weren't trained. They didn't know how to move quietly. They had never climbed anything higher than a stage rig. If something went wrong, they'd slow the others down, or worse, get everyone killed.
The silence was so taut it could have been strung between their necks. Baekhyun clenched his jaw, the familiar heat of humiliation rising up. He heard Sehun’s breath hitch and saw Chanyeol’s head dip, a hand scrubbing the back of his neck like he could erase his own embarrassment. Baekhyun wanted to protest, to crack a joke that would break the tension, but found nothing good enough.
Then Xiumin moved. Not dramatically, not with a rallying shout, just levered himself upright and dusted drywall powder from his palms. He didn’t look at the others, only at Seo-ah, as if he could will her to see a layer deeper.
“We know,” Xiumin said. Not flinching. His voice was so deadpan it was almost reassuring. “We’re scared. We’re not trained enough. That’s obvious.”
Baekhyun hadn’t expected that. He’d expected some counterpoint, a defense, a plea for leniency. Instead, truth, stripped raw.
Seo-ah’s expression shifted, barely. There was a flicker of something Baekhyun almost recognized, a sort of challenge.
“But we’re not asking you to carry us,” Xiumin went on. “We’ll do whatever you say. We’ll learn it on the way down if we have to.”
He pointed at the map, the tunnel lines, the crude Xs and notations. “If you tell us to crawl, we crawl. If you tell us to run, we run. If you tell us to stay quiet, even Baekhyun will try his best.”
Baekhyun made a face. “Hey.”
A couple of tired smiles rippled around the circle, barely there, like static on a dead channel.
Xiumin folded his arms, looked back to Seo-ah. “We won’t be dead weight. Just…give us a chance.”
Seo-ah didn’t answer right away. She let the moment hang, as if waiting to see if the sincerity would evaporate. Instead, it held. Baekhyun found himself staring at the dirty floor, at the useless tangle of cable ties, at the crowbar, at anything except her face.
“… Just give us the chance,” Xiumin repeated, voice even, gaze unblinking.
The room shrank to nothing, time suspended on the aftertaste of those words. Seo-ah didn’t blink. She surveyed each of them—Sehun’s panicked set of jaw, Chanyeol’s knuckles blanching, the crowbar between Min-jae’s knees. She met Xiumin’s stare last, unwilling to yield even a centimeter, and she let the moment breathe until even Ji-won’s patience began to fray.
“Okay,” she said. The syllable dropped like a coin. “You got it.”
No celebration. Baekhyun didn’t dare look at the others. The relief was too raw. Instead, he stared at the grime under his nails and waited for the real test.
Seo-ah’s next words came lighter, almost joking. “Just, if any of you panic halfway down—” She pointed at the map, then at the window, and finally at Chanyeol. “I’m cutting the pipe. Clean break.”
He made a sound that was mostly vowels. Somewhere behind Baekhyun, Ha-yoon barked a laugh. The tension, for a fraction of a second, broke.
Plans materialized with terrifying speed after that. Cable ties looped into makeshift harnesses, crowbar lashed to a length of pipe for leverage, dry runs with the ladder against the wall. There wasn’t time to process, only to act.
Baekhyun was first. He felt Ji-won’s eyes on him, the silent command to get moving. The adrenaline threaded into Baekhyun’s muscles, hot and jumpy. Eighty feet of open air. A pipe, a ladder, cable ties as thick as his thumb. No harnesses. No safety. He tried to swallow but nearly gagged on the dry taste of the room. The apocalypse had a flavor—metal, sweat, and the lingering ghost of disinfectant.
Tae-ho said nothing, just braced his weight against the window frame and ran the cable ties through his hands. He gave the pipe a final, violent jerk. It held, vibrating with a sound that made Baekhyun’s teeth ache.
He was first. No argument in that, no time to negotiate. Baekhyun pressed his palm to the glass, feeling the chill leak into his skin. He looked down. The city, veiled in a new layer of fog, refused to reveal the ground. He couldn’t see the bottom. Maybe better that way. He forced his gaze upward, toward the horizon, and tried to pretend he was gearing up for a stadium stunt.
"We're seriously doing this?"
"No better option." Ji-won's answer was immediate.
He nodded once. Arguing wouldn't change anything.
He swallowed hard and reached for the pipe.
Just as he leaned over, hands pressed lightly on both his shoulders and jolted him.
His heart slammed against his ribs.
He spun around and saw Seo-ah standing there, that infuriating smile on her face.
"What is wrong with you?!"
Seo-ah shrugged and gave him a bright wink.
"See you downstairs."
And before anyone could stop her she swung over the ledge.
Baekhyun nearly lost his balance at the way she just launched herself. The clang of her boots on the pipe echoed up the concrete shaft, louder than gunfire in the hush. He waited for the scream, the sound of flesh and bone meeting the street, but all he heard was the rasp of hands, the metallic squeal of descent, and then that muffled hit. It was impressive, and in a way, he hated it. It left him with a hot shame in the pit of his stomach.
Chanyeol muttered behind him, “She’s insane. She’s actually insane.” His voice was pitched low, the joke already stale with terror.
He glanced back at Ji-won for the briefest second. She stared through him, rifle at her hip, a silent metronome ticking in the set of her jaw. No sign of approval. No sign of doubt. He felt like an insect pinned to a slide. She didn’t have to say anything. Her silence was a threat - if he didn’t go, she’d throw him herself.
Baekhyun wiped his palms on his pants. The damp made the cloth cling. The wind coming through the open window was a razor. He swung one leg over the sill and clamped a hesitant grip on the cable ties. The city below might as well have been the moon—cold, unfamiliar, promising worse things than gravity.
He tried to remember the steps: let your foot find a groove, hug the pipe with your knees, go slow. He didn’t trust his memory. He didn’t trust his arms. He trusted nothing, except maybe the bruises he’d earn if he hesitated.
“Come on, superstar,” Ji-won said, barely a whisper, but the words carried enough ice to sting. “She’s waiting.”
He went. It was less a climb than a controlled fall. His shoes slipped on slick metal and every instinct screamed to claw his way back up. His hands burned on the descent, shredded by microscopic grits of rust no one had bothered to sand down. At the third floor, his body started to shake from the effort. At the second, his vision tunnelled. He thought of the stage, the blinding lights, the way the crowd’s noise vibrated in his chest. He never thought he’d want that again.
He landed harder than Seo-ah had, nearly twisting his ankle, but she caught his elbow, steady and shockingly warm. The ground buckled in his knees and his teeth clacked. He tasted blood—maybe his, maybe not. He blinked against the tears in his eyes. Seo-ah grinned at him from the gloom, her breath plume-white in the cold.
“Not bad,” she said. “For a rookie.”
He tried to laugh, but it came out as a gasp. He wanted to punch her, or hug her, or both at once.
Behind them, the next body dropped. Chanyeol’s shadow stretched huge and monstrous as he rappelled down, limbs too long for coordination. He landed like a sack of laundry, wheezing, but upright.
One by one they trickled down: Xiumin, then Suho, all of them evacuating the building like survivors abandoning a sinking ship. No one wanted to be above the eighth floor. Not anymore.
Only Ji-won, Tae-ho, and the others remained above, orchestrating the retreat with military precision. Baekhyun could still hear their voices, the clipped commands, the low hum of something dreadful approaching in the silence.
“Ha-yoon,” Ji-won said, and Ha-yoon straightened like she’d been summoned for execution. There was no tremor in Ji-won’s voice—just that dead calm that made it impossible to say no.
“Yes, Captain,” Ha-yoon answered, her own voice tight. She shuffled to the open window, peered down, and immediately went green around the edges.
Baekhyun, wiping blood from his palm, watched her shoulders hitch.
“It’s fine,” Seo-ah called up. Not quite a taunt, not quite comfort. “You got this!”
Ha-yoon pressed her lips together, then wiped both hands on the thighs of her jeans, leaving parallel stains. The city, eighty feet below, waited with all the patience of a predator. She took the pipe in both hands and closed her eyes.
Tae-ho stepped up behind her and clipped the cable tie around her waist, double-checking the buckle. He leaned in, voice low. “I’ve got you.”
She nodded, once, quick as a pulse, then swung her legs over the sill and vanished into the white cold. The only sound was a hiss, the friction of coat on pipe.
Baekhyun heard her boots scrape the lower ledge, then another grunt as she landed.
A hand shot out, Seo-ah’s, of course, steadying her with a grip that was almost gentle. “Nice landing,” Seo-ah said, and for a moment, Ha-yoon thought she might actually throw up on her.
She bent, hands on knees, and spat onto the concrete. “Hate this,” she muttered.
Another body dropped, Min-jae, landing catlike. His first move was to check Ha-yoon for blood, then check himself. “Nothing broken?” he asked.
Ha-yoon shook her head, already straightening. “I’m fine.” Her mouth buzzed with adrenaline, the aftertaste of fear.
Above, a silhouette moved to the window. Soo-jin. Rifle slung, hair tied back so tight it looked painful. She didn’t hesitate—just slithered out, touched down with barely a sound. By the time she reached the street, she’d already covered them, eyes hunting for anything that might move.
Ji-won and Tae-ho were the last to drop, the pipe almost giving away under Tae-ho’s weight.
As soon as he had landed, he snaked his way through the others and linked hands with Ha-yoon. “Sorry babe. I know this was tough for you.”
Ha-yoon just smiled and pecked his hand.
The streets remained unnervingly silent. Only the distant creak of metal somewhere far away. Ji-won raised a closed fist and nodded at Seo-ah.
Seo-ah led them away from the building, deeper into the fog. She didn’t look back.
Neither did they.
They moved through the city like old tectonics—steady, silent, shifting with every step. The route was ugly, but clear, up the vacant pedestrian mall, past the emptied designer stores with their rolling steel grilles punched in like a mouthful of broken teeth, through the glass atrium where the early sunlight fell in watery slabs.
Baekhyun followed, throat dry, ankle throbbing from the descent. He tried not to notice how every window reflected him a dozen different ways—dirtier, more haunted than before. He kept his eyes on the line of backs ahead, Tae-ho’s hunched bulk, Ji-won’s taut stride, Ha-yoon quick and low to the ground. He couldn’t see Seo-ah. She was already gone—through the threshold, barely a ripple in the air, as if she’d never existed at all.
“Where is she?” he whispered, mostly to himself.
Ha-yoon looked back, her voice barely a breath. “Scouting ahead. She’ll double back when she’s sure it’s empty.”
“And if it’s not?” Baekhyun said.
Ha-yoon shrugged, the movement fragile, almost apologetic. “Then we keep moving anyway.”
At each block, they waited, pressed against whatever felt solid—a concrete planter, a stairwell, the skeleton of a bus stop with its glass all atomized—and listened. Every sound was an event - the wind, tickling loose some banner that beat itself to death against a lamppost. A distant, irregular thud, like a body falling at the far end of a parking garage. The static on Ha-yoon’s comm, as she cycled through dead frequencies until she reached the same answer every time.
They moved, then stopped again. Each stretch felt longer, more exposed. Baekhyun’s palms ran with sweat, the cold air now spiked with a distant tang—oil, maybe, or the long-settled rot of something left too long in the sun.
Then, at the edge of a pharmacy, Seo-ah appeared. She didn’t materialize so much as step out from between two vending machines, as if she’d been waiting for them to catch up. Her face was flushed, hair matted to her forehead, but she grinned when she saw the group.
She waved. “Road’s blocked ahead. This path’s clear,” she said hinting back at the pharmacy. “But there’s… a thing.”
Ji-won moved up, quick. “How many?”
“Not sure. One in the stairwell, maybe few farther in. It’s—” Seo-ah hesitated, scratching at the gauze on her arm. “Yeah we need to keep an eye out.”
And then she was gone again. She didn’t even leave a footprint behind. Baekhyun watched the shadow where she’d been, his own pulse making the world stutter. She moved like physics didn’t apply—like her body had decided on a different set of rules and no one had the guts to stop her.
Ji-won checked the corners. She led them through the glass-raked lobby, her hand tight around the rifle. Baekhyun tried to map the space as they moved, pale marble tiles, shattered windows, posters hanging limp over nothing. He barely made out the words—DOREMI PHARMACY—before the next turn.
They waited in a small, choked vestibule for what felt like twenty minutes. Baekhyun tasted rust in the back of his mouth. Every second that Seo-ah didn’t return, the group’s silence thickened. He tried to distract himself, counting the beads of water on the shattered window, five, seven, twelve, before the next breath.
Inside, the shelves were mostly picked clean, but a few boxes still clung to the racks—painkillers, bottled water, some unfamiliar blister-packs labeled in Hangul. Min-jae took point, rifling through the counter for anything useful. Baekhyun watched him empty a drawer into his backpack, his movements fast and clean.
When Seo-ah materialized again she was crouched behind a cigarette vending machine, eyes dark and wild. She held up a hand—five fingers, then three, then a flat palm.
Ji-won nodded, then called over her shoulder: “Move.”
They cleared the landing and exit through a back door.
Five minutes later, she dropped from the second-floor fire escape of a karaoke bar and landed in a low crouch in front of the group. Baekhyun sucked in a breath he’d been holding and stared. He’d been watching the street, he’d been watching the windows, and yet somehow, she’d appeared exactly where he wasn’t looking.
“Clear,” Seo-ah said, voice raw. “Office tower. Eight floors checked. Elevators are down, but the stairwells are clear.” She rolled her neck, wiped a palm on her pants.
She barely paused for breath before she was gone again, vaulting a turnstile with her good arm and slipping into the lobby of a convenience store like a ghost in a bad dream. He counted—one, two, three—then saw her again, three shopfronts down, squatting behind a rolling steel gate. She waved them forward, a sharp flick of her hand, then was gone once more.
D.O. pressed his lips together. He glanced at the cluster of them shuffling into the shadow of a bus shelter, then at Ji-won. “Where are we going?” He tried to sound casual, but the words came out like a surrender.
Ji-won barely turned her head. “Seongnam Base. We were told to report there after sweep. It should be secure, if anywhere is.” Her voice carried a conviction that dared anyone to suggest a better idea.
D.O. kept quiet after that, but Baekhyun could feel the question hanging in the air, a silent dare. They all wanted to ask: What if the base is empty? What if they’re walking into another dead end?
But his attention couldn’t let go of Seo-ah, the way she’d reappeared, then vanished, as if she could step through walls. He watched her sprint the length of a block, leap a curb, duck beneath a caved-in shop awning, all without losing momentum. She gave nothing to the world around her—no fear, no hesitation. He wondered what it must be like, living in a body that moved because it wanted to, not because it had to.
Tae-ho caught his lingering stare. “She’s slow today,” he said, voice pitched so only Baekhyun would hear. Not scornful, just matter-of-fact. “Usually she makes the rest of us look like we’re standing still.”
Baekhyun couldn’t help it. “She’s not afraid?”
Tae-ho shrugged, the movement barely visible beneath his jacket. “She’s always afraid. That’s why she’s good at this.” Then, softer, “It’s the ones who stop being afraid that don’t make it out.”
Baekhyun watched the mouth of the alley where she’d vanished. “Doesn’t feel right,” he said. “Sending her out there alone.”
Tae-ho glanced at him sideways. Ji-won answered instead, without turning her head.
“Nobody sends her anywhere.” A beat. “We look at what’s ahead, and we send whoever’s most likely to return. That’s the whole calculation.” She shifted her grip on the rifle. “We wouldn’t put her somewhere she couldn’t survive. We can’t afford to.”
Tae-ho added, quieter: “And she knows that.”
Baekhyun looked at Ji-won’s profile—jaw set, eyes already on the next corner. He understood then that it wasn’t coldness, it was the opposite. It was the most careful thing they had left.
The group pressed on in staggered bursts, always waiting for Seo-ah’s return at each intersection. Sometimes she brought news—three on the next corner, one in the alley. Sometimes she just gave the all clear, and they jogged for it. She never led them into a trap. Baekhyun wondered if she was mapping the city in her head, plotting safe lines around horrors only she could see.
“There are dozens,” Seo-ah said. “Maybe hundreds. In the buildings—just standing there. Not moving.” She raked a hand through her hair, found a knot of blood, and laughed. “I almost walked straight into a crowd. Good news is, they’re not looking for us. Not yet. We stick to the alleys, and we can skirt them.”
Ji-won nodded, already plotting three moves ahead. “Did you see a way through the intersection?”
“Yeah. But we’ll have to go single file. And keep low—the glass is everywhere.” Seo-ah glanced at the group, then at EXO. “If anyone’s going to freak out, do it now.”
The city changed as they moved south—more glass, less neon. The storefronts grew taller. Whole banks and clinics loomed overhead, their lobbies lit by the hard white of emergency lights. The creatures stood inside, silhouettes against the glass, unmoving. They watched them against the window displays, in rows of two or three, never moving a muscle.
It was like running a gauntlet of mannequins. Occasionally one would turn its head, its creepy eyes sewn shut. The others didn’t move at all.
“Are they hibernating?” Chanyeol whispered, voice dry as static.
Jongin shook his head, eyes locked on a thing still in what looked like the aftermath of a suit, its body pressed flat to the glass. “Not hibernating. Just waiting. Dormant.” He tried to mask the terror with a low laugh, but the sound didn’t clear his throat.
In front, Seo-ah held up a closed fist. The group bunched up, breathing ragged, every eye tracking her as she pointed to a city bus tilted half-off the curb. “Next stop’s a ride,” she said. “It’s empty. We move, fast and quiet.”
The bus was an old city model, paint blistered to a dull blue, the windows bandaged with tape and plastic. At some point, someone had tried to torch the interior—char lines crossed the seats and dash, the air thick with the memory of melted vinyl and singed hair. There was no blood. That felt like a blessing. There was no driver either, not even a trace. Ghost bus, ready to be haunted by the next set of fools.
Seo-ah was first in, boots crunching on shattered glass. She swept the aisle with the muzzle of her pistol, every step bracing for the lurch of another not-quite-dead thing lurking behind a seat. Nothing. Just the dust and the silence, and the echo of her own ragged breath.
She slipped to the back, checked the emergency exit, found it jammed shut with a bent crowbar. Good sign, or terrible sign. She let her hand rest on the cold metal, then turned, watching the rest pile in.
Ha-yoon went straight for the driver’s seat, her hands already shaking out the comm wires and prying at the access panel beneath the dash. Min-jae followed, hauling Baekhyun and the others up the steps, herding them like a sheepdog with a limp. Tae-ho and Ji-won lingered outside, scanning the block, rifles at low ready, eyes stretched to the horizon and back.
Ha-yoon crouched under the driver’s dash, her voice muffled by the tangle of wires. Her hands flew over the dash, flicked switches, yanked the key. Nothing. The engine didn’t even cough. She checked the battery lights, saw the flatline, and spat a curse. “Battery’s dead,” she called out.
“What about the spare?” Seo-ah was already moving, rifling through the glove box, the overhead racks, anything dumber than hope.
Ha-yoon shook her head, fingers already probing the panels under the wheel. “It’s not just dead, it’s fried. Something shorted it.” She hit the main breaker, tried again, and got a thin, whistling whine, as if the machine was learning to beg for mercy. She yanked the service hatch, dove under the dash again.
She was already at work, popping the fuse box, stripping wires with her teeth when the clippers jammed. The rest of the group huddled in the aisle and under the windows, heads ducked, bodies pressed so close Baekhyun could feel the cold sweat of Sehun’s arm through both their jackets.
Chanyeol pressed his face to the glass, breath fogging the window. “Are we just gonna sit here?”
Seo-ah shot him a look. “Unless you want to jog to Seongnam, yes.” Her lips curled, but the joke tasted bitter. She eyed the row of buildings across the street, counting silhouettes, then counting again. It felt like each shadow moved a little closer every time she looked away.
Outside, the city’s hush frayed at the edges. Baekhyun looked through the grimy windows and saw the figures in the glass lobbies, their faces pressed to the cold, just as before. They weren’t moving. But it felt wrong now, like they were holding their breath.
Behind him, Soo-jin kept her rifle aimed through the rear doors, but her focus was pinched, eyes darting left to right. Ji-won hovered behind Ha-yoon, voice tight, “How long?”
“Fuck this,” Ha-yoon mumbled, wrenching a chunk of wire free. It sliced her thumb. She sucked at the blood and kept working. “If this doesn’t spark, we’re walking.”
“Don’t think about it,” Min-jae said. He wasn’t talking to Ha-yoon, or to anyone; just narrating the air. “In and out. We get it running, we’re gone.”
Baekhyun edged into a seat across from them, knees knocking. His hands wouldn’t stop moving—tapping, flexing, then fisting against his knees as if he could suffocate his own nerves. He watched her, waiting for some sign, some miracle, before it was too late.
Above them, a faint rotor sound pulsed through the buildings, so distant it could have been a memory. The new sound cut through the air—a low, distant chop, thicker than anything he was used to hearing in the city. The vibration built and built, a heavy thudding that made the bus windows buzz in their frames. It was a helicopter.
The sound grew into a presence, not just a noise but a judgment trembling the glass. Baekhyun’s first thought was: rescue. For a second, he let himself believe. He craned his neck, tried to catch a slice of sky through the bus’s crusted windows, but the angle was wrong, the city too tall and narrow. The sound became a scythe, slicing the air, and then the helicopter was overhead—so close the frame of the bus seemed to breathe with it.
Sehun grabbed his sleeve. “Can they see us?”
He wanted to say yes, but the beam of the searchlight swept the intersection and moved on, not pausing, not even slowing. It didn’t linger over the bus or its cargo. The light was clinical, uninterested in the ground, scanning for something bigger, or smaller, or not them at all. The sound expanded, then receded, and as abruptly as it had arrived, it was gone.
Baekhyun’s ears rang in the vacuum left behind. Then something worse filled it.
A new sound, one he’d only ever heard in nightmares and disaster drills—an emergency siren, the kind that flattens your insides, the kind that means missile, flood, catastrophe. It bellowed from every direction at once, a city-wide shriek pouring from hidden speakers in the concrete, a banshee wail that slammed into Baekhyun’s skull so hard he nearly hit the floor.
Ha-yoon shrieked, a curse or a prayer, he couldn’t tell. Her hands flashed, splicing a last wire, and the dash lights coughed to life. The engine didn’t start, but the faint blue glow of the display was an answer worth anything.
Outside, the mannequins in the glass lobbies began to move. Not fast, not all at once, but horribly in unison. Their heads turned together, like sunflowers seeking dawn, every face now pointed at the bus. The siren bored into Baekhyun’s teeth, made his tongue buzz. He felt the urge to move, to run, but there was nowhere to go. He thought of the old apocalypse movies—how the monsters always looked fake, how the real terror was the camera lingering on the faces of the terrified. He’d never understood it until now.
He saw Chanyeol’s jaw go slack. The others pressed lower, as if a few centimeters might save them from what was coming.
Ji-won’s voice was a wire through the panic. “Get it started.”
“Almost—” Ha-yoon gritted, she yanked the fuse with her teeth and jammed it into a new port. The bus’s engine whined, caught, then died. She tried again, and this time it stuttered and coughed, a sound like drowning. Baekhyun’s hand found the headrest in front of him, squeezed until the vinyl cut lines into his palm.
The figures from across the street broke from their window displays, moving with a violence that made Baekhyun’s stomach twist. The first ones hit the street, stumbled, adjusted, then began to sprint—full-tilt, all limbs, like wild dogs let out of an elevator. More joined. From every building, every alley, every shadow—dozens, then scores, then too many to count. They converged on the bus.
“Ha-yoon NOW!” Ji-won shouted, and Ha-yoon slammed her fist into the ignition, kicking the underside of the dash. The bus coughed, choked, but this time roared to life.
Bang Bang - EXO (RPF)
Baekhyun + Jongdae, R
1920s Jazz Club AU | 8700 words
After a routine job goes wrong, Baekhyun begins to realise Jongdae is hiding something. What he discovers will change the way he looks at the world, and the lengths he’s willing to go to protect it.
[Read on AO3]
This is part two of a series of interconnected EXO AU fics.
genre: bf!au, fluffy smut, just a little drabble of y/n and chanyeol being in love 💕
1k words
it’s a friday night. the week was long for both you and chanyeol. having just finished your 8 to 4, you were feeling pretty lazy. you both agreed to a simple dinner which was code for “find what you can in the fridge and make it into a soup”.
the food was done in 20 minutes, record time, eager to just crash on the couch and watch a movie in each others arms. it was only 5pm and yet, the pjs were thrown on immediately after supper.
as if you couldn’t love him more, chanyeol surprised you with your favourite chips and soda. you thanked him with a big fat kiss and the tightest hug, feeling so loved by him.
you’ve settled down on the couch, your back against chanyeol’s, as you rewatch the first season of greys anatomy. chanyeols arm is draped across your waist, stroking your belly absentmindedly. your feet rub against his in an effort to warm your pair. it’s the calm you needed after a long week at work. being in your lovers arms, that’s all you could ever wish for.
you squeal when you see meredith and viper kiss for the first time and it’s revealed that derek was there to see it.
You make out with patients now?
you completely lose it in chanyeol’s hold, feet kicking his in excitement.
“hey, hey, small couch!!” chanyeol laughs at you, pulling on your waist so he was now above you. he smiles sweetly before giving you a quick peck on the lips. “you’re so cute when you fangirl.”
“it gets me every time.” you return the kiss, snaking your hand behind his neck and pulling him closer to you to deepen the kiss. his lips match your slow pace. your tongues wrestle each other unhurriedly like you have all night to ravish.
you nip at his bottom lip and pull at it slightly, earning you a slight moan. his hand massages your side while he nudges your legs apart. it’s your turn to moan when you can feel his growing member through his pjs as it lightly grazes your heat. he sneaks his fingers through your boxer shorts and swipes across your wet folds.
“so wet.” he hums against your lips, now using two fingers to circle your clit with your wetness. he’s applying the perfect amount of pressure but gosh, is he taking your time with you.
you don’t even care. you know chanyeol would take care of you all night if you asked.
“mm, you’re being so nice and patient.” he notices your efforts to be his good girl and rewards you with a bit of a quicker pace. you gasp in his mouth and tighten your hold around his neck, pulling him even closer to you if that was even possible.
you were craving him. your body has been aching to be in his hold like this. this was love you never thought you would ever get the chance to experience.
chanyeols pace grows quicker, rubbing your clit with such expertise. he knew your body so well. he knew which angle to apply the pressure and he knew counterclockwise was how to get you undone. As expected, your face began to show the fruits of his labour. your brows were furrowing. your eyes were squeezed shut. your back was arching.
chanyeol puts a hand to your cheek, urging you to open your eyes because this is his favourite part and you know it. to your best attempt, your lashes flutter open and look into chanyeols eyes. they’re encouraging and filled with love. he wants you to cum on his fingers and he wants you to be looking at him when you do.
“cum for me, my love.” he says like it’s the magic words to get you to finish. chanyeol watches as your eyes try their best to focus on him. your toes curl into the couch, a leg instinctively rising from the pure ecstasy you were feeling. he bites his lip, turned on by the way he has you, all of you, all to himself. “you’re so beautiful, honey.”
he kisses you so passionately, so deeply. you’re so overwhelmed by love. you end up making out for a little longer, completely enamoured with being in his touch and having his lips on yours. chanyeol continues to rub circles around your sensitive heat, just in love with how you feel in his touch. he’s not trying to make you cum again. he just loves to feel you. he slips a finger inside you, pumping in and out with no rush, just wanting to be in you and feel your gummy walls around his finger.
you squeeze around him, not expecting him to add another finger. he’s obsessed with you. he’s memorizing every inch of you, not afraid that he’ll lose you but purely because he wants to know all of you.
“my yeol, can i please have you inside of me?” you remove your lips from his and you both gasp for air. you just want to be filled by him, want him to be inside of you all night. he nods before turning you so you were now facing the tv again. he slides both your bottoms off and lifts your leg slightly. he swipes his cock against your fold, wetting his member with your fluids. you share a moan when he slowly enters you without a rush.
“you’re so perfect for me. we’re like a perfect little puzzle piece.” you giggle at his comment and rest a hand on his ass, pushing him into you and setting the deliberate pace. his hips follow your lead. he takes your chin between his fingers and turns it towards him so he could kiss you as he fucks you at a tantalizingly slow cadence. you move your hand to the back of his neck and run your fingers through his hair.
“i love you so fucking much. it hurts not being in you like this all day.” chanyeol is hitting that spot inside of you that has you seeing stars. you squeeze him every time he hits it. he groans against your lips and you can feel his hunger when he tightens his grip around your thigh. his hips begin to move at a quicker pace. his fingers return to your clit and he rubs you in the way he knows so well. before you knew it, you’ve become an aching, pulsing mess around him, yelping against his lips from cumming for the second time.
chanyeol fucks you through it and explodes inside of you. but he doesn’t care that he’s cum already, he continues to fuck you until he can’t feel you pulsing around him anymore.
“my yeol,” you gasp. “i love you.”
“oh my love, i’m going to show you how much more i love you.”
chananyeol bong: lowkey highkey this is a self insert hahaahahah this was supposed to be pure fluff but then i saw that shirtless video oh chanyeol checking himself out. so that + not being able to sleep = this. anyways pls enjoyyyyyy like comment subscribe link in bio wtv wtv 💓🙆🏻♀️💕🍒
⟢ a pediatrician!baekhyun au req'd by this lovely anonie <3 :') ty baby!
sum: you and baekhyun were college sweethearts, bound by shared dreams of a future together. but when he was accepted to a medical residency program across the country, you kept a secret—you're pregnant. fearing that your news would derail his dream of becoming a doctor, you chose to disappear, raising your daughter alone. three years later, in a new city, you bring your little girl in for a routine check-up, only to discover her pediatrician is none other than baekhyun, her father.
જ⁀➴°⋆ content: 18+/MDNI. 24.2k+ words. omg Hahaha 🫣. baekhyun x f!reader. chanyeol x f!reader. baekhyun x f!oc. lovers to strangers to co-parents to lovers again. angst, slow burn, fluffy, then we get reaaaallll smutty ⟡ pet names, praise kink, body worship, unprotected sex, p in v, bulge kink, creampie, slight breeding kink (y'all should know me by now 🤟🏼😣) ⟡ ALSO! i made a playlist for you guys to vibe out to while you read cus i love u <3 :') its linked in the title!!!
you and baekhyun had once been the epitome of college sweethearts—late-night study sessions that bled into spontaneous adventures, laughter, and whispered dreams of a future together. you were inseparable, his drive to become a doctor and your quiet dream of building a life with him making everything feel so perfect. you could picture it all—the home, the life, the love, knowing you’d be together forever.
during those years, you moved in together. things got serious quickly. talks of marriage, kids, and a future you’d both start building when the time was right were always at the forefront. but as much as you both wanted to dive in right away, you both agreed that you’d wait until baekhyun had at least finished his schooling and residency. it made perfect sense—his dream of becoming a doctor came first, and you were happy to support him, knowing you’d have a lifetime to make it all happen.
you’d completed undergrad together, then post-grad, and now, with your master’s behind you, baekhyun was finishing med school and applying to residency programs. everything seemed to be unfolding just as it should.
but life, as it tends to do, shifted unexpectedly.
when baekhyun’s acceptance letter arrived—the one from his dream residency program across the country—your world tilted, skewed into something unrecognizable. this was his number one pick, the culmination of years of sacrifice and determination. you should’ve been ecstatic, screaming with joy for him, for his future. but instead, a foreign weight settled low in your stomach, twisting into something unnameable.
you’d only just found out, barely two days ago. pregnant. the word clung to you like a vice, heavy and suffocating. you hadn’t planned for this, hadn’t even considered it a possibility. and yet, here it was—undeniable. that stupid test, its second line blaring back at you like a neon sign, mocking the life you thought you had under control.
you stared at it, willing the line to fade, to disappear, to become a cruel trick of your imagination. but it didn’t. and the next test didn’t either. nor the one after. five little sticks, five blaring truths. undeniable. inescapable.
you didn’t want to hold him back. not when his dreams were so close. not when the future he had worked so hard for was finally within his grasp.
so you made a decision. you couldn’t tell him. you couldn’t bear to see the guilt and the pain in his eyes as he would undoubtedly sacrifice his dreams for you and the baby. you thought it was the right thing to do, that you were doing him a favor by disappearing, by cutting off all contact.
you had moved to a new city—far from the places where memories of baekhyun lingered, far from the shadow of the life you’d carefully unraveled. it wasn’t easy; untangling yourself from him had felt like pulling threads from a tapestry until it barely resembled what it once was. but over time, you found a rhythm. a life where thoughts of him became a quiet hum rather than a deafening roar, where the love that had once consumed you slipped quietly into the recesses of your heart.
and now, three years later, you stand here as someone completely transformed: a mother.
raising your daughter alone had its challenges, sure, but you couldn’t deny the sense of purpose it gave you. you were made for this. or maybe it was her—the tiny miracle who had made it all feel so natural. from the moment she came into the world, she was an angel, a light so radiant it softened even the hardest days.
sure, she had her moments. she was a toddler, after all, still learning how to navigate big feelings in a little body. but her resilience—the way she could fall apart one minute and bounce back the next—made everything easier. she was your shadow, your little mimic, always wanting to copy everything you did.
the love she gave you was pure and boundless, something you hadn’t realized could exist until she was in your arms. it was a love that filled the spaces in you that you didn’t even know were empty, a love that made the sacrifices and sleepless nights worth it.
you often found yourself wondering if she was a gift straight from the universe, a little piece of heaven sent just for you. every smile she gave, every tight hug, every soft ‘i love you, mommy’ felt like proof that you were the luckiest soul alive.
and as you watched her now, her tiny fingers curled around her favorite stuffed bunny, a swell of overwhelming gratitude washed over you. life had twisted and turned in ways you never could’ve anticipated, but somehow, in her, it had gifted you everything you’d ever need.
maybe it was the depth of love she gave, the way she radiated warmth and light, that made the thought of telling baekhyun even more terrifying. she was everything—the way her laughter could turn any bad day around, the way her eyes sparkled with innocence and curiosity. a fragile little soul, so beautiful it almost hurt. and you knew, deep down, that baekhyun would’ve adored her. loved her more than words could describe.
the thought of it—of him finding out, of him knowing you’d kept her from him, hidden this piece of him, this precious life from him—it twisted something deep inside you. it made your chest tighten, your thoughts spiral. the guilt, the shame—it felt like a constant ache, one that only grew the more you thought about it.
you and baekhyun talked about it, after all—the future you both dreamed of. lazy nights tangled together under blankets, whispering about what life would look like years down the road. marriage, a house filled with warmth and laughter, children.
he wanted a family with you. he was so sure of it, so sure of you. he used to say that he couldn’t imagine anyone else being the mother of his kids. the way he looked at you when he said it—it was as if his soul had reached out, seen yours, and said, there she is, the one we’ve been waiting for.
he was a dreamer. he’d mapped it all out in his head—two girls, two boys. his perfect little quartet. the oldest, a girl, to set the tone, to be the leader of the pack. then a boy to balance things out, another boy to roughhouse and make the middle feel less lonely, and finally, the baby of the family, a girl to soften the edges of the chaos. he laughed at the improbability of it all, at how life doesn’t work like that, but he loved dreaming about it anyway.
you still remembered the way his face lit up when you’d asked him, teasing, what he’d name his first daughter.
he didn’t even hesitate. he looked up at you, that smile you used to know better than your own, and said, minji.
your little girl, minji, was the brightest star in your universe, her laughter a melody that softened every hard edge of your world. her smile—warm and golden—was like sunlight spilling into the corners of your heart, chasing away the shadows that lingered from the life you left behind. she was growing so fast, each day a reminder of how fleeting these moments were, and how much you wanted to hold onto them.
sometimes, though, when the house was quiet and the weight of the past crept in, you allowed yourself to think about baekhyun. it was never for long—just a passing thought, a wondering what if. you didn’t dare to linger, didn’t dare to stir up the bittersweet ache of old feelings and lingering regrets. he had his life now, and you had yours.
but still, he had been the love of your life, and that kind of love doesn’t just disappear. curiosity tugged at you from time to time. late at night, when minji was fast asleep, you’d catch yourself wondering what he was doing, where he was, if he ever thought about you, too.
yet no matter how strong the urge, you never gave in. you wouldn’t let yourself open his socials, wouldn’t let yourself peer into the window of the life he was living without you. it wasn’t that you didn’t want to know—it was that you couldn’t. because knowing might hurt more than not knowing, and the delicate balance you’d created would come crashing down.
you hadn’t blocked him, not on anything. instead, you deleted every account, wiped your digital footprint clean, and changed your number. you made sure there was no way for him to reach you, no thread he could pull to unravel the wall you’d built between you.
you never allowed yourself to dwell on how hurt he might have been—how confused he must’ve felt, waiting for a call or a text that never came. the promises you’d made to him echoed in your mind, haunting you. i’ll tell him when the time is right. but the right time never came.
and then she was born. tiny fingers curling around yours, eyes so full of life. she reached milestones—her first smile, her first steps, her first word—and with each one, the weight of telling him grew heavier. how could you? how could you drop this truth on him after he’d already missed so much?
you imagined his reaction: the sharp edge of his disappointment, the rawness of his hurt, the anger that would burn in his chest. he’d ask you why—why did you wait? why did you let so much time pass? and you’d have no answer, nothing that could make it right.
as the years went by, the truth turned into a mountain too steep to climb. every day that passed felt like another brick in the wall separating you. every moment you stayed silent made it harder to imagine breaking that silence.
you told yourself it was for the best. you told yourself he deserved better than someone who had made this choice, this mess.
because deep down, you believed it: you didn’t deserve him. not anymore. not after this
the sound of tiny sneakers squeaking against the linoleum floor filled the pediatrician’s office as you followed your daughter toward the nurse’s station. she clutched her favorite stuffed animal tightly in one hand while the other reached back for yours, her eyes wide with curiosity as she took in the colorful murals on the walls.
it was a routine check-up for minji, nothing out of the ordinary. she had been a healthy, happy child since birth, and today was just another appointment to ensure that everything was progressing as it should.
you had scheduled the appointment weeks ago, not knowing who the pediatrician was going to be. when you walked into the small, sunlit office, minji tugged excitedly on your sleeve, her eyes wide with curiosity at the brightly colored walls and the small toys scattered around the waiting room.
“mommy, look!” she gasped, pointing to a painted giraffe. her excitement momentarily eased the nervous flutter in your stomach. “a giraffe!”
“yes, it is, bun! good job!” you smile down at the little girl, holding your hand tightly.
it had been over three years. three years since you’d left your old life—and him—behind. baekhyun was supposed to be a part of your daughter’s story, but you made the impossible choice of keeping him out of it. his dreams had always been so big, and you didn’t want to weigh them down with your own.
a medical assistant called your name, her warm, practiced smile cutting through the haze of your thoughts.
you scooped your daughter into your arms, her tiny hands clutching her stuffed bunny, and followed the nurse into the examination room. she wriggled slightly but settled on your lap, the bunny tucked snugly under her chin as she began the usual routine.
height. weight. temperature. the nurse kept up a cheerful, steady rhythm of chatter, her voice a soft hum in the background as your daughter giggled at the stickers offered to her.
“dr. byun will be in shortly,” the medical assistant said with a final smile before leaving the room.
your heart stopped.
'dr. byun'?
no. it couldn’t be him. it had to be a coincidence. it was a common enough name, wasn’t it? but the sound of it crashed into you, unraveling the calm façade you’d so carefully built.
you told yourself you were being ridiculous. you told yourself to breathe. but the name echoed in your head, louder with every passing second, until you could barely hear your own thoughts over the roar of panic rising in your chest.
then came the knock.
soft. polite.
the door creaked open, and time seemed to slow to an agonizing crawl as he stepped inside.
your breath caught in your throat.
it was him.
fuck.
no.
this wasn’t supposed to happen. not like this. this wasn’t how he was supposed to find out. there were plans you never made, conversations you never had.
this was a complete and utter nightmare. and there was no waking up from it.
“hi, i’m dr. byun—” his voice wavered, the words barely leaving his lips before they caught in his throat. his eyes found yours, wide with recognition, a spark of disbelief flashing like lightning in a storm.
his gaze drifted downward, landing on the little girl perched on your lap. her tiny hands clutched your sweater, her curious eyes meeting his with unfiltered wonder.
for a moment, the world seemed to stop turning.
his lips parted, and your name slipped out, soft and breathless, as if saying it might make the moment vanish. “it’s you,” he murmured, a mixture of shock and something deeper lacing his tone.
you couldn’t find your voice, couldn’t push past the lump forming in your throat. it was as though every nerve in your body had frozen, locked under the weight of his stare.
your daughter, oblivious to the tension coiling around you, tilted her head with a sunny smile. her voice rang out, bright and pure, shattering the silence like glass.
“hi, dr. byun!” she chirped, her words sweet and unassuming, a small anchor of innocence in the overwhelming tide of emotions threatening to pull you under.
baekhyun’s eyes widened instantly, flickering between you and her. you could see the cogs in his mind turning, the pieces falling into place far quicker than you were ready for.
his gaze lingered on her—studying, comparing. the resemblance was impossible to ignore. the same dark, expressive eyes that had once melted your heart, the same warm, radiant smile that mirrored his own.
“is…is she?” his voice was barely above a whisper, as though he wasn’t asking you but trying to make sense of the impossible himself. his eyes never left her, as if every second he stared brought him closer to the undeniable truth.
her delicate features were a perfect blend of you both, like a portrait painted with pieces of your souls. the curve of his nose graced her face, paired with the flush of your rosy cheeks. his silky black hair framed her tiny head, while your lips formed the gentle pout she wore even in sleep. your eyes shone through hers, but her ears—those were unmistakably his. she was everything you were, everything he was—woven together into this perfect, fragile little person, carrying pieces of a love that felt both timeless and out of reach. and now, looking at her, there was no denying it.
your mouth opened, but the words didn’t come. you tried to speak, to explain, to say something—anything—but all that escaped was a breath, shallow and lost in the silence that filled the space between you. the truth hung there, thick and fragile, like a thread that could snap at any moment, leaving you exposed.
you could only nod, slow and uncertain, as the weight of everything pressed down on you. the guilt was suffocating, heavy like a stone lodged in your chest, threatening to spill out in the form of tears you couldn’t afford to shed. but there was no escaping it anymore.
she was his.
baekhyun sank to his knees in front of her, his movements tentative, as if afraid that any sudden motion might make her disappear. he leaned in, eyes soft with a mixture of awe and something deeper, something unspoken.
“so, tell me. what’s your name, sweetheart?” his voice was gentle, tender, the words falling from his lips like a promise he wasn’t quite ready to make.
“minji,” she said proudly, her tiny hands holding up her stuffed bunny, as though it were the most important thing in the world. “this is sonny. she’s a bunny.”
the moment her name reached his ears, something shifted in baekhyun’s chest. his heart skipped, and a smile tugged at the corners of his lips, soft and amazed. for a brief second, he was lost in the memory of a quiet conversation—the one where you’d asked him what he would want to name your daughter, and how that moment, so simple, had felt like a lifetime ago.
“hi, minji,” he said softly, his voice trembling as his eyes locked onto her small, curious face. he crouched slightly, lowering himself to her level, and the words caught in his throat. “i’m…” his gaze flickered upward to yours, and in that brief second, the weight of it all was laid bare. his expression faltered, his eyes glossing with unshed tears, carrying the unspoken words and unresolved emotions that hung heavy between you.
you saw it then—the man he was before, the one you fell for, unchanged and yet altered by time and pain.
“…a good friend of your mommy’s,” he finally managed, the words shaky but kind.
minji giggled, her laughter light and carefree, like a burst of sunshine breaking through a storm. “mommy has lots of friends!” she chirped, her innocence unknowingly twisting the knife in baekhyun’s chest.
he nodded with a soft smile, his lips barely curving, as if the weight of her words was too much to bear. “she does, doesn’t she?” he murmured. his hands moved carefully as he began preparing for her exam, every motion deliberate, like he was trying to steady himself through the task.
but his eyes… his eyes stayed rooted to the ground, skirting around yours as if meeting your gaze would undo him entirely. and as you stood there, watching him avoid you, something inside you cracked. you knew why. you knew he wasn’t ready yet—not to face you, not to confront the flood of everything that had been left unsaid.
as baekhyun began the check-up, it was as if the floodgates of your heart had been ripped open. memories surged in, overwhelming you like a tidal wave—those plans you had once woven together, the future you had dreamed of, the life you thought you’d build before everything crumbled. nearly four years had passed since you disappeared without a trace, but those dreams now felt like fragile, delicate threads, tangled in the web of secrets you’d spun to protect him.
baekhyun moved with the same calm professionalism that you remembered—his hands steady and sure as he worked. but you couldn’t tear your gaze away from him, from the way he interacted with minji—his touch soft and deliberate, his voice lilting with that same soothing cadence. it was a tenderness that sliced through you, sharp and immediate, a reminder of everything you’d lost. how could you have let him slip away? how could you have convinced yourself that walking away was the right choice?
watching him, gently checking minji’s ears, his voice quieting her in the way he once did for you, something inside you twisted painfully. you couldn’t run from him anymore. not now. not ever again.
the exam ended far too quickly. minji bounced off the examination table, her bunny clutched in her small arms, and baekhyun handed you a stack of papers—educational handouts, visit summaries, the usual paperwork from a child’s wellness check. his fingers brushed yours as he passed them to you, and the brief touch left a burning trail that lingered long after.
minji’s small hand tugged at your sleeve, warm and insistent, her voice a soft melody that cut through the heavy air. “mommy, mommy! can we go play now?”
you forced a smile, but it didn’t reach your eyes. the weight of the moment pressed on your chest, and you fought to keep the tears from falling. “sure, bun. we’ll go in just a minute.”
the word bun hung in the air between you, and baekhyun flinched. his eyes flickered with something raw, a mix of pain and recognition. that name. it was something he used to call you— a relic of a past that felt both distant and achingly close.
his gaze didn’t leave you, like he was trying to unravel the walls you’d so carefully built around yourself. there was a quiet intensity in his eyes, as if he was searching for something buried deep within you. the space between you both thickened, heavy with unspoken words. it felt suffocating, like the air was being stolen from your lungs. this was it. the moment that would change everything.
after what felt like an eternity, baekhyun cleared his throat, his voice thick with restraint. “we need to talk,” he said, the words heavy and laced with something you couldn’t quite name. “please… i just… i have so many questions.”
you nodded quickly, the anxiety twisting your insides into knots. “um, sure… i can meet you after i drop her off at daycare?” your words rushed out, frantic, as your brow furrowed in uncertainty.
"there’s a coffee shop nearby," he murmured, his voice soft yet steady, the words deliberate. his hand moved to pull out a notepad, pen poised above the paper. with a few swift strokes, he jotted down the name of the place before folding the paper and handing it to you. "i have a couple more patients to see this morning. do you think you can meet me there in an hour?"
his voice was calm, but his eyes—those eyes—told a different story. they flickered with something raw, something desperate, like a storm fighting its way to the surface.
you took the slip of paper, your fingers brushing his, a small shock of warmth shooting through you at the touch. you glanced down at the paper, his handwriting still familiar, though now slightly uneven, as if his nerves had bled into the ink. beneath the coffee shop's name, his number was written—neat but hurried, a subtle tremor in the lines.
you looked back up, and his gaze met yours—quiet, intense, full of unspoken things. without a word, he nodded toward the paper, his voice steady but laced with something fragile, something that didn’t quite fit with the man you knew. "that's my number, bun. just in case you're running late or something."
you nodded, a smile tugging at the corners of your mouth, but it felt tight, strained. his nickname for you—a small, tender thing—lingered in the air like a spark. you felt it in your chest, but the words caught in your throat. too much. too many emotions swirling. your hands moved on instinct, gathering minji’s things, offering him a tight, polite smile before ushering your daughter out of the room.
but just as you turned to leave, you swore you heard him whisper—barely audible, a plea caught between his teeth, "please, don't leave me hanging this time."
it hit you like a blow to the gut, leaving you breathless. the weight of it pressed down on you, suffocating.
and in that moment, you knew with brutal clarity—you deserved that.
you sat there, the weight of your nerves pressing down on you, each breath feeling too loud in the quiet of the café. baekhyun chatted casually with the barista, ordering drinks like it was any other day, like nothing had changed between you two. his voice was light, unbothered, but it only made the tension in your chest heavier. you gripped the strap of your bag so tightly your fingers ached, heart pounding in your ears, drowning out the soft hum of conversation around you. your mind raced in circles, desperately searching for the right words—something to apologize for the years you took from him, for keeping his daughter from him, for all the lies. but no matter how hard you tried to form the apology, the truth hovered over you: what you did was unforgivable.
when baekhyun finally returned, he slid your drink in front of you, his movements slower than usual, almost tentative. you brought the cup to your lips, the warmth of it familiar, the taste exactly as you remembered—comforting, like a quiet reminder of everything you'd tried to bury.
"i remembered how you liked your coffee," baekhyun murmured, his voice softer than before, tinged with uncertainty. "i hope it's still the same."
you met his gaze, your throat tight as you forced a small smile. "it is. thank you."
baekhyun exhaled a heavy breath, running a hand through his hair, his fingers snagging in the tousled strands. his eyes drifted away from yours, unable to meet your gaze, as if the weight of this moment was pressing down on him just as much as it was on you.
"so..." you began, your voice hesitant, but before you could find the right words, he interrupted.
“i’m engaged,” he blurted, the words sharp and sudden, like a slap to the face.
it hit you in the chest, the shock stealing the air from your lungs. the room seemed to tilt, the ground beneath you crumbling, and you couldn’t find your footing. as if this day wasn’t heavy enough, this new weight crushed you under its force.
"oh," you whispered, the word tasting hollow, barely escaping as your heart constricted. "congratulations. i'm sure she's... amazing."
"mhm," he hummed softly, a brief flicker of a smile tugging at the corner of his mouth before it faded. his eyes dropped to his coffee cup, watching the steam rise like he was searching for something in the shifting mist, anything to avoid the tension between you.
you couldn’t find the strength to say more. words seemed pointless now. instead, you sat there, biting your lip, your gaze fixed on the table as jealousy and heartbreak clawed at you from the inside. you knew you had no right to feel this way, no right to be hurt after everything that had happened. but still, the ache lingered, a quiet, relentless sting.
his fingers raked through his hair again, the tension in his jaw unmistakable as he exhaled sharply, frustration thick in the air. when he finally met your gaze, his eyes were raw with hurt, every unspoken word between you now painfully exposed. "so why didn't you tell me? about minji?"
you'd rehearsed this moment a thousand times in your mind, each word crafted carefully, but now, sitting across from him, it all felt empty, hollow. "you had just gotten into your residency program," you said softly, voice shaky. "it was your dream. i…i didn’t want to hold you back."
his eyes darkened, the hurt twisting into something sharper. "so what? you thought you could decide for me? you think i wouldn't have wanted to be there?" his voice cracked with emotion, rising. "do you have any idea how much i waited for you? how many nights i sat by the phone, praying you'd call?"
the weight of it hit you, hard. you'd known, of course—he'd been dropped from the program. he'd fought tooth and nail to get into a second-choice school, one that brought him here, to this city. and now, here he was, sitting across from you, the remnants of his sacrifice hanging in the silence between you.
his gaze faltered, dropping to the steaming cup in front of him. he stared at the swirling mist as if it held the answers, as if the rising steam could ease the hurt, the questions, the ache that had settled between you.
you didn’t know what to say anymore. words felt pointless, insignificant in the face of everything that had unfolded. instead, you sat there, biting your lip, unable to meet his eyes, while jealousy and regret clawed at your chest. it wasn’t your place to feel this way—not after everything you had done. but the sting of it, sharp and biting, wouldn’t fade.
the tears you had spent so long holding back finally began to break free, each drop feeling like it had been waiting a lifetime to fall. you didn’t want to keep apologizing, but the words slipped out, hollow and fragile. "it wasn’t an easy choice, baekhyun. i thought i was doing the right thing."
“‘the right thing’?” his voice softened, but the hurt in his words still rang out like a chord being pulled too tight. "you didn’t even give me a chance. i missed everything—her first steps, her first words. you took all of that from me."
your throat tightened, each breath harder to catch. you swallowed, and your voice cracked under the weight of the truth. “i know,” you whispered, the regret clawing at you. “i regret it every day.”
baekhyun’s hands were curled into fists, white knuckles pressing into the table like they could anchor him in place. he didn’t look at you—his gaze was lost in his coffee, the silence hanging heavily between you both. and then, after what felt like an eternity of stillness, he spoke again, his voice quieter, as if the question had burned him from the inside. “does she know?”
you shook your head slowly, feeling your chest tighten. “i haven’t told her. i didn’t know how... but she’s been asking. she sees the other kids with their dads and wonders why she doesn’t have one.”
baekhyun covered his face with his hands, rubbing his eyes as if trying to erase the raw pain. "i can't believe this. i can't believe you."
"i know, baekhyun," you whispered, tears spilling down your face without control now. "you have every right to hate me... and if you want, you don’t have to see either one of us again—"
his voice sliced through your words, thick with disbelief, tremoring as if he couldn’t comprehend what you were saying. "are you... are you serious right now? you’d leave? again? how is that supposed to fix anything? did you not think i wanted her? wanted you? we’ve talked about this, bun... you knew what it meant for me to be a dad."
the sobs broke free from you then, impossible to hold back, your chest aching with each desperate breath. you wiped at your face, but your hands trembled too violently, the tears just wouldn’t stop. all you could choke out were broken apologies, fragments of regret slipping between your breaths. "i knew you’d drop everything for her. for us. but... you becoming a doctor, that was your dream... and i was just so scared."
he leaned forward, his expression softening, but there was still a fire in his eyes. “i want to be in her life,” he said, his voice firm, steady, eyes red from the silent tears streaming down his face. “she’s my daughter. and i want to know her. i want her to know me. her father.”
you looked at him, your heart heavy with guilt. “i wasn’t planning to keep you away,” you said, your voice cracking. “i just... i didn’t know how to tell you after all this time.”
baekhyun’s gaze softened, his voice quieter but resolute. “we’ll figure it out. but i’m not letting you push me away again.”
you paused, biting your lip, anxiety clawing at your chest. “but what about your fiancée? you already had a life of your own before today…i can’t help but feel like i’ve fucked everything up for you, baekhyun.”
he shook his head, a soft, bitter laugh escaping him before he quickly suppressed it. his voice faltered, the nickname slipping out before he even realized it. “don’t worry about that, bun—” he stopped mid-sentence, the word tasting strange and wrong on his tongue after your mention of his fiancée. it was as if, in that moment, he’d completely forgotten about her. he cleared his throat, trying to steady himself. “i mean… just let me handle that. but for now... please, promise me you won’t disappear again. promise me you won’t take her away from me. i’m begging you... let me in. i feel like you owe me that much.”
you nodded, the promise catching in your throat. “i promise.”
you scrolled slowly through your camera roll, fingers grazing over the images of your daughter, sharing them with baekhyun—each one, a snapshot of her life, a memory you’d held in secret for so long. each photo was like a tender piece of your soul, each moment a quiet confession of everything that had unfolded without him. there was a rawness in it, a vulnerability that felt like you were unwrapping your heart for him, and it was overwhelming. for both of you.
he sat there, eyes scanning the photos, and a storm of emotions swirled within him. there was anger, sharp and bitter, that you’d kept minji hidden from him. all those years, a secret that was both yours and hers to carry. betrayal lingered in his chest, not from you, but from the truth that he hadn’t been there, that he’d missed out on so much. and yet, despite it not being his fault, guilt settled heavy in his heart—guilt that you had to raise her alone. guilt for every moment you’d carried the weight of motherhood without him by your side.
but baekhyun, the man who had always been able to push past the shadows of the past, found something in the photos—something bright, something he could hold onto. minji’s smile, sweet and dimpled, was a beacon of hope. it was everything he needed to see, to ignite a fire within him. it wasn’t just a reminder of what was lost—it was the fuel that would drive him to make up for every single moment he’d missed.
the weight of the conversation shifted slowly, and before you even realized it, the words spilled out. you couldn’t stop yourself—you had to ask about her. his fiancée.
he told you her name was soo. they met during his residency, he said, when she helped pull him from the darkest corner of his life—the place where your absence had left him, broken and barely breathing. she was the one who stitched him back together, the one who healed the wound you’d left, a wound that, it seemed, only she could mend.
and yet, even as he spoke, despite the rawness of his confession, he wasn’t trying to make you feel guilty. he didn’t want to hurt you. but the words hung there, thick with unspoken emotions.
then, he showed you the photos. of her. oh god, she was beautiful. radiant, in a way that seemed to glow from within. they looked like they were made for each other, perfectly matched, intertwined in a way you could never hope to be. he spoke of her with awe—how brilliant and kind she was.
and as he spoke, something tugged at the edges of your thoughts. his eyes, usually so bright and full of warmth when he spoke of someone he loved, were different now. softer, distant. the sparkle that once lived there had dimmed, as if the affection he had for her wasn’t as alive as it once had been. you told yourself not to read too much into it, to not dwell on the subtle shift. it had been years. people changed, didn’t they? he wasn’t the same baekhyun you remembered. especially not after everything you had put him through.
it stirred a jealousy in you, sharp and bitter, but deeper than that, it left a dull ache settling in your chest. you longed to be the one he spoke of with such adoration, the one he admired in every way. you couldn’t stop yourself from wondering if he ever spoke about you like that—if he ever felt for you the way he now seemed to feel for her. it burned like poison in your veins, a vile and familiar ache that made you sick to your stomach. you hated it. hated how it made you feel so small, so unimportant. the weight of it made you want to vanish, to slip out of your own skin, anything to escape the suffocating reality of it all. you should be happy for him. happy that he had found someone who could make him feel whole again. but all you could feel was the hollow ache of your own failure to ever be enough.
you tried to smile, tried to hold yourself together, but each compliment, each story, each glowing word about her, hit you like a dagger to the chest. you couldn’t listen anymore. you didn’t want to.
it was too much. before you even realized it, you were standing, your throat tight as you forced the words out. “i... i need to go. um, i have to make dinner…and pick up minji from daycare. i’ll text you. we can figure out a time for you both to meet properly.”
before he could respond, you were out the door, the bells above the café door jingling as you fled.
but you didn’t make it far. a few seconds later, you heard the hurried footsteps behind you, his voice calling out. “bun—fuck, wait! slow down!”
you could feel the tears streaming down your face again, hot and uncontrollable. you wiped them hastily, hoping he didn’t see. but of course, he did. he always did.
“look,” baekhyun began, his voice softer now, tinged with something you couldn’t place. “i never thought i’d hear from you again. and now you just—pop back into my life, on a random friday, with a daughter i had no idea about. i’m sorry if you’re upset that there’s someone else in my life. but please... don’t punish me for finding myself again after you completely destroyed me.”
his words hit harder than anything you could’ve prepared for. your knees felt weak, your heart shattering with every syllable. because it was true. every part of it. you had done this. you’d pushed him away, and now you had no right to feel this way, no right to demand anything.
"baek," you whispered, your voice barely above a breath, trembling under the weight of everything you couldn’t say. "you’re right. i don’t have the right to feel this way. i just... when i saw you again, it was like everything came crashing back. all those old feelings—things i thought i’d buried—flooded back in an instant. but i swear, i won’t keep minji from you. i won’t. and... i’m honestly so glad you’ve found happiness. and soo—she... she seems amazing. i can see why you’re with her. and... i’m genuinely looking forward to co-parenting with you both. really."
you swallowed hard, the words like sandpaper against your throat. the lie at the end tasted bitter, clinging to the back of your tongue, but you forced them out anyway. you needed him to believe it. needed him to let you go so you could retreat to the quiet of your own space, where you could curl up and weep in the solitude of your own shame.
his expression softened, though there was something unreadable in his eyes. “hmm…okay.” he reached into his pocket, pulling out your phone. “you left this on the table. and, uh… you promise you’ll stay in contact?”
you nodded quickly, unlocking your phone and typing your name into the message. “you have mine now, too.”
a small relief flashed in his eyes when he saw your name on the screen. he nodded, his voice steady. “thank you. let me know when you’re both ready. we’ll make this work.”
you nodded, your throat tight as you wiped away the last of the tears. you offered him a half-smile, barely managing to hold it together, before turning away. your feet felt heavy as you walked to your car, the silence between you louder than anything.
when you finally arrived home, everything came crashing down at once, a tidal wave that hit you full-force. the weight of everything you’d been holding inside pressed into your chest, suffocating, like your lungs had forgotten how to breathe. you collapsed, body trembling, as sobs wrenched their way through you—soft, guttural cries that seemed to echo in the emptiness of your apartment. tears streamed down your face, thick and relentless, each one heavier than the last, as if they were washing away more than just your sorrow. how had you managed to mess everything up this badly?
the feeling of being lost in your own failure was dizzying, a dark spiral that threatened to swallow you whole.
chanyeol, your next-door neighbor, was more than just a friendly face. he was a single parent too, his daughter nari being the same age as minji. from the moment you’d moved in, the girls had been inseparable—like they were two halves of the same whole, constantly together, sharing everything from toys to whispered secrets. and over time, you and chanyeol had become something more than neighbors. you were lifelines to one another, navigating the chaos of single parenthood side by side. daycare pickups, late-night texts for advice, emergency contact calls—they were moments that built trust, moments that held you both up when the world felt too heavy.
but then there were the other moments. the ones that neither of you had planned, yet they happened all the same.
on nights when the girls had sleepovers, tucked under either your roof or his, the house would fall into an eerie stillness, a quiet so profound it felt almost alien. no toys scattered across the floor, no giggles or whispers. just an empty house, and the faint hum of the world outside. in those moments, the bottle of wine always made its way to the table—deep crimson liquid swirling in your glass, catching the soft light in a way that felt too intimate, too inviting. the scent of it lingered in the air, rich and heady, like a secret waiting to be shared. one glass became two, then three, until the words flowed freely, unguarded.
laughter bubbled between you both, light and carefree, mingling with the quiet sounds of the night. and somewhere, in the subtle space between casual conversation and shared history, something shifted—unspoken, but impossible to ignore. it wasn’t deliberate, not in the beginning, but it was undeniable. a quiet tension hung between you both, the kind that hummed just below the surface, like a chord waiting to be struck.
in the warm, dim light, the lines between friendship and something more began to blur. his lips brushed yours—not quite a kiss, but not exactly innocent either. the taste of wine lingered on his mouth, mingling with something darker, something deeper, something unspoken. your hands—almost of their own accord—found their way to each other, fingers tracing the outline of familiar paths, not quite daring to go any further. the touch was careful, deliberate, like a dance on the edge of something you both knew was dangerous, but too tempting to resist.
each kiss lingered just long enough to leave you wanting more, but never deepened enough to cross the line you both feared. the weight of unspoken rules hung between you, pulling back every time either of you tried to cross the line. clothes were the only barrier between you, a fragile wall that you both clung to, even as the urge to tear it down grew stronger.
but even in the silence, the weight of your unresolved feelings for baekhyun settled heavily in the room, a ghost that neither of you could escape. and chanyeol—he carried his own baggage. the loss of his wife, a wound that had never fully healed, leaving him to raise nari on his own, balancing grief and fatherhood in a way that only he understood. he wasn’t looking for more. not from you. not yet.
the timing was all wrong, the space between you wasn’t yours to claim. but in those rare moments, it felt as if maybe, just maybe, it could have been.
it was never spoken aloud, but you both knew the truth. chanyeol knew you still loved baekhyun, and that truth hung between you like a quiet weight. neither of you disturbed it. the unspoken agreement between you was that your daughters came first, no matter what. whatever might have blossomed between you, if it ever did, had to come naturally, unburdened by guilt or pretense.
but in those moments, when the air between you grew thick with something more, a quiet voice inside you would pull you back. it reminded you of the messy knots still holding your heart in place, the wounds that hadn’t yet healed. you couldn’t move forward—not yet. not while your heart was still tangled with baekhyun.
chanyeol, always the gentleman, never pushed. he was patient, always aware of your needs, always respectful of the boundaries you set. when you needed to talk, he listened; when you needed space, he gave it. but in the quiet of his own heart, he couldn’t help but feel more for you than he allowed himself to admit. how could he not? you were beautiful, strong, and a devoted mother. you embraced nari as your own, and in doing so, you made his heart ache in ways he couldn’t express. even knowing your heart was still tethered to someone else, he couldn’t stop himself from wishing—just for a moment—that maybe, just maybe, one day you’d find your way to him.
he carried that silent ache with the kind of grace only he could muster, never letting it slip, even as it quietly wore at him, just a little more each day.
so when you texted him—asking if he could pick up minji, keeping the explanation vague, not wanting him to worry—he was there. barely ten minutes later, a soft knock at your door echoed through the silence.
when you opened it, his wide eyes met the mess that was you—mascara streaks trailing down your cheeks, a crumpled tissue clenched in your trembling hand. you tried to muster a smile, but it felt paper-thin, your voice weak and brittle. “yeolie? what’s up?”
the words barely left your lips before he froze in place, his expression shifting from confusion to alarm. “a-are you okay? what’s going on? did someone—did something happen? is minji okay? are you sick? do you need me to take you to the hospital?” his voice cracked, the flood of questions spilling out in rapid succession, his panic tangible.
you stepped aside, pulling the door open wider, silently inviting him in. he didn’t hesitate, stepping through, his gaze glued to yours like he was searching for answers in your tear-stained face.
he trailed behind you to the couch, his presence steady and grounding as you collapsed onto the cushions, tears streaming freely. through shaky breaths, you unraveled the tangled mess of your day—the awkward reunion, the jumbled emotions, the weight of everything that seemed to be crumbling all at once. you didn’t dare admit the jealousy clawing at your chest, the hollow ache that filled you when baekhyun spoke about his fiancée with such love. that part you kept tucked away, too raw, too humiliating to expose.
chanyeol sat beside you, his towering frame a comforting shadow as he listened. really listened. his hand moved in soothing circles along your back, a silent reassurance that he wasn’t going anywhere.
your words poured out, no longer confined to just the events of the day but expanding into everything—the years that had passed, the guilt that had burrowed deep and refused to let go. every regret, every misstep, every weight you’d carried alone spilled out in a torrent of tears and confessions. and chanyeol just sat there, unwavering, holding space for you in the way only a true friend could.
“hey,” he began, his voice soft yet steady, as if anchoring you in the storm of your own thoughts. that signature dimpled smile appeared, warm and reassuring, carrying a kindness that made your chest tighten. “no one’s perfect,” he said, his gaze locking with yours, as though he could see the weight of your regret. “it’s okay to have moments you wish you could take back. you don’t need to have it all figured out right now—just take it one step at a time, yeah? what matters is where you go from here, and i know you’ll choose the right path.”
his hand brushed against yours, grounding you further. “no matter what, nari and i will always be here. for you and minji. you’re not in this alone.”
you swallowed hard, his words cutting through the mess of emotions tangled in your chest. the sincerity in his voice, the unwavering warmth in his eyes—it was almost too much. you nodded slowly, blinking back the tears threatening to spill.
“thank you,” you whispered, your voice barely audible, but you knew he heard it. “i don’t even know if i deserve this kind of support... but it means everything. truly.”
your fingers fidgeted with the edge of your sleeve, the weight of his reassurance settling over you like a safety net. the corner of your lips lifted into the faintest smile, a flicker of gratitude breaking through your doubt. “and…thank you, yeollie. for always being here for us.”
he pulled you into a hug, the kind only chanyeol could give—one that made you feel like you were wrapped in the coziest, softest blanket on the coldest day. his size alone made it impossible not to feel safe, like he could shield you from the entire world.
"stay put," he murmured, his voice low and soothing against your hair. "i’ll go pick up the girls. how about we pick up a pizza on the way home? maybe a bottle of wine to go with it?"
you couldn’t help the small laugh that bubbled up, the weight on your chest lifting just enough to let it out. "yeah... i’d like that. thanks, yeol."
he grinned as he stood, his steps sure and familiar as he moved to the fridge. the sound of the door opening and bottles clinking against each other filled the room. when he returned, he handed you one of the water bottles, twisting the cap off for you with ease.
"drink up," he said, flicking a finger gently under your chin to tilt your head up, a playful glint in his eyes. "don’t need you passing out on me from dehydration."
his teasing tone, coupled with the affection in his gesture, made your heart feel a little lighter. you took the bottle from him, your fingers brushing his briefly, and for the first time all day, you felt a spark of comfort.
later that night, minji lay tucked beneath her soft quilt, her favorite bunny held close to her chest. the warm glow of the nightlight painted her face in soft hues, the shadows dancing gently across her room like a lullaby. you leaned over her small form, pressing a tender kiss to her forehead. "i love you," you whispered, your voice a soothing murmur. "sleep tight, bun."
as your hand hovered over the light switch, her voice stopped you in your tracks, delicate yet filled with curiosity. "hey, mommy," she called, her tone innocent and thoughtful. "why does that doctor from earlier call you that, too?"
the question struck a chord deep within you, freezing you for a moment as your heart stumbled over itself. turning back toward her, you forced a smile, smoothing the sudden tension coiling in your chest. walking slowly to her bedside, you perched at the edge, meeting her wide, trusting eyes. "well," you started softly, your voice steady despite the fluttering unease within. "like dr. byun said, he's a really good friend of mine. that’s where i got your nickname, too."
her face lit up, her small smile so pure it made your heart ache. she nodded slowly, processing your words in that way only children can, her gaze thoughtful yet brimming with trust. "he was nice," she said, her tone sweet and certain. "i really liked him."
"yeah?" you asked, crouching down so your eyes were level with hers, the warmth of her sincerity wrapping around you like a blanket. her simple joy tugged at something tender within you. "would you like to see him again?"
her smile widened, blooming like the sun breaking through clouds. excitement sparkled in her eyes, her whole face lighting up in a way that mirrored her love for ice cream on hot afternoons. she nodded vigorously, her enthusiasm bubbling over.
"uh-huh!" she chirped, her joy infectious, spreading a flicker of warmth through your own heart.
you couldn’t help but laugh, the sound soft and full of love. "okay, bunny," you said, tucking a stray strand of hair behind your ear, your voice tender. "sleep tight, 'kay?" you pressed another soft kiss to her forehead, lingering for a moment, before turning off the light. the door clicked shut softly behind you.
standing in the hallway, your back against the cool wall, you let out a long, shaky breath, the weight of the day settling heavily in your chest. the silence was broken by a ping from your phone, pulling you out of your thoughts. you stared at the screen, the light illuminating your face as a new message appeared.
baekhyun:
thank you for today. let’s talk soon about how we move forward—together.
your chest tightened, the words settling over you like a heavy blanket. this was the beginning of something you hadn’t seen coming, something that made your pulse race with equal parts fear and exhilaration.
you responded quickly, almost without thinking:
you free tomorrow to go over details?
the path ahead was a little scary and clouded with uncertainty, but one thing was for sure: baekhyun was here, and he wasn’t going anywhere.
baekhyun and minji bonded quicker than you ever imagined. their first playdate was a sunny afternoon at the park, where baekhyun seemed completely absorbed in her. every giggle, every burst of energy as she dashed between slides and swings, every scrunched-nose smile lit up his face. it was as if he was trying to memorize every little detail about her, committing her essence to memory. minji, ever the social butterfly, welcomed him without hesitation—just as she did her classmates, her teachers, and even chanyeol.
chanyeol.
his name slipped into your thoughts uninvited, a shadow that tugged at your focus. why were you thinking about him now? you blinked hard, shaking the thought away. the last thing you needed was to let another layer of complication invade your already chaotic emotions.
then came that afternoon. baekhyun had come to drop minji off at your place, the usual familiarity of the moment interrupted by the unexpected. when the door swung open, it wasn’t you standing there—it was chanyeol.
“baekhyun, right?” chanyeol greeted him warmly, his easy smile bright enough to momentarily disarm. his dimple pressed deep into his cheek, as if it was carved there just for moments like this. snapping his fingers in playful recognition, he added, “i’ve heard so much about you.” he gestured casually over his shoulder, as if to invite baekhyun in. “i’m chanyeol. and that’s nari over there.”
baekhyun froze, the weight of the moment pressing down on him like an invisible force. for a split second, his expression faltered, eyes flickering to the cheerful little girl in the background, her laughter filling the air. then, his gaze shifted back to chanyeol, studying him with a quiet intensity. there was something unspoken in the air between them, subtle yet impossible to ignore—a tension that lingered like a low hum.
his eyes darted past chanyeol, chest tightening as they landed on you. you were seated on the floor, cross-legged, a radiant smile stretching across your face as you and nari played with minji’s toys. the sound of your laughter, bright and unguarded, hit him square in the chest, stirring something raw and vulnerable deep inside him. you looked so at ease, as if the joy spilling from you was effortless, untouched by the weight of the past.
“hi, chanyeol!” minji’s voice rang out, cutting through the fog of his thoughts. her tiny arms stretched toward the tall man, her excitement spilling over in a cheerful squeal.
chanyeol didn’t hesitate, scooping her up with the ease of someone who’d done it a hundred times before. “i missed you!” minji giggled, wrapping her small arms tightly around his neck.
“i missed you too, bun,” chanyeol replied with a wide grin, holding her close.
baekhyun’s stomach twisted, the word hitting him like a slap. bun. his nickname for her. no—their nickname. a sharp possessiveness surged through him, hot and consuming. did chanyeol call you that too? the thought crept in like a poison, making his jaw tighten. it was irrational, and yet it burned, carving out a hollow ache in his chest.
you stood then, walking toward them, your smile warm and glowing like the softest light. chanyeol still had minji perched on his hip, cradling her as if she were his own. he leaned in, planting an exaggerated, playful kiss on her cheek, earning a burst of delighted giggles from her.
the sound, the sight of it all—your ease, minji’s trust, chanyeol’s familiarity—brought baekhyun to the edge. his chest tightened, his breathing shallow, and for a brief, unsteady moment, he felt like he might collapse under the weight of it. the life he wanted was right in front of him, his life, and yet, it felt just out of reach.
“i missed you, bunny,” you murmured, your fingers tenderly brushing through her soft, dark hair. minji tilted her head up to you, her eyes glittering like tiny stars. then she turned to him, her small hand waving eagerly. “bye, baekhyun!” she chirped, her voice bright and pure, her little toothy grin so heartbreakingly innocent it nearly brought him to his knees.
baekhyun’s chest tightened, the pressure unbearable. how could something so sweet hurt so much?
you stepped closer, and for a fleeting moment, baekhyun forgot how to breathe. your smile was warm, easy, and devastatingly familiar—a smile that used to be his. it softened the tension hanging in the air, but to him, it cut deeper than any blade.
“thanks for picking her up from daycare,” you said, your voice gentle, almost apologetic. the sincerity in your tone slipped past every defense he’d tried to build since that day you walked back into his life. “did you wanna come inside for a bit? we usually do taco tuesdays with chanyeol and nari. you’re more than welcome to join us.”
your words were casual, but the invitation felt anything but. “i think it’d be great, actually,” you added, your voice bright with optimism. “since chanyeol’s been in minji’s life for a little over a year now.”
the floor seemed to tilt beneath him. his body stiffened, and a violent twist gripped his heart. chanyeol. a year. the words echoed mercilessly in his mind, louder and louder until they drowned out everything else. he wanted to tell you no, to scream it, to tell you he’d rather rip his chest open and claw his heart out than walk into that house and see the life you were building without him. a life that looked so perfect. a life where he was nothing but a footnote.
instead, he forced a smile—thin, hollow, the kind of smile that only deepened the cracks in his façade. it was nothing more than a mask, a feeble attempt to conceal the storm raging beneath his skin. “i’m actually in a hurry,” he said, the words stiff and unnatural as they stumbled off his tongue. “gotta get to the clinic.”
a lie, plain and simple. it came too easily, slipping past his lips like second nature. the instant it escaped, he felt the sick churn of regret twisting in his stomach, his voice betraying him with a clipped edge he couldn’t quite hide.
your head tilted slightly, confusion flickering across your face like a shadow. “didn’t you guys already close for the day?” you asked, your brows knitting together in that subtle way that always made his chest ache. “it’s past six.”
his pulse stuttered, a silent curse tumbling through his mind as he fumbled for an answer that wouldn’t shatter the fragile distance he was desperately clinging to. but nothing came. nothing convincing enough. nothing that didn’t feel like quicksand.
his feet shifted instinctively, retreating before his resolve could crumble further. “charts and prescriptions and... you know, stuff,” he mumbled, taking an awkward step back. “i’ll see you later.”
before you could say another word, he turned, walking briskly toward his car. his steps were measured, his pride refusing to let him break into a full-on sprint, even as his heart hammered like a war drum. every step felt heavier than the last, the weight of his lie and your confusion pressing down on him like a vice.
he didn’t dare look back. if he did, he knew he wouldn’t have the strength to keep going.
from behind him, minji’s giggles rang out like music, the sound breaking through the thickness in the air. you were pressing playful kisses to her cheeks, your exaggerated smooches sending her into a fit of laughter.
it was almost too much. the scene—the two of you together, so natural, so perfect—made his knees weak. he gripped the handle of his car door and paused, his chest heaving as he fought the urge to look back. to stay.
but he didn’t. he slid into the driver’s seat and pulled away, leaving behind the ache that followed him everywhere you and minji weren’t.
as baekhyun drove away, his grip on the steering wheel tightened until his knuckles turned a stark white. the image of you standing there with chanyeol and the two girls—your girls—seared into his mind, an indelible mark he couldn’t shake. you looked like a perfect family, like something pulled straight out of a dream. but for baekhyun, it was nothing short of a nightmare.
every mile he put between himself and your door pressed harder on the ache in his chest. his thoughts roared louder than the hum of the engine, drowning out everything but one relentless truth: that should’ve been me.
he couldn’t keep doing this—living in the fragile shell of a life that barely held him together. pretending he was fine without you, without minji. pretending that every day apart wasn’t hollow, wasn’t agony. each moment away from the two of you felt like a wound he couldn’t heal, the kind that gnawed at him constantly, leaving him restless and raw.
he dragged a trembling hand through his hair as the silence around him became unbearable. pacing the length of his living room later that night, his mind was still trapped back at your doorstep. he could hear your laugh echoing in his ears, the way it always lit up every corner of his world. the memory of your voice, soft and full of meaning, saying his name. minji’s tiny hands gripping his, her trust as effortless as her love. every memory sharpened the longing, the undeniable knowledge that you were his. you always had been. and yet, here he was—stuck in a life that felt like it belonged to someone else.
it wasn’t fair. not to him. not to you. and certainly not to her. the woman waiting for him at home, wearing the ring he had slipped onto her finger when he was too weak to face the truth. she deserved more. she deserved better. she deserved a man who wasn’t haunted by another woman’s smile, another child’s laughter.
his fists clenched at his sides as the weight of his choices bore down on him. guilt dug into him like a blade, twisting with every second. and yet, beneath it all, one truth burned brighter than anything else: he needed you. he needed you and minji, your warmth, your chaos, the life you had created without him.
he could feel it unraveling, the lie he was clinging to. every passing day stretched it thinner, threatening to snap. and when it did, he wasn’t sure what would be left of him—only that it wouldn’t be enough without you.
after a few more park playdates, you invited baekhyun over for dinner. when he arrived, he held two bouquets—one vibrant and blooming for you, and a smaller, delicate arrangement for minji.
minji’s face lit up as she clutched her flowers, her excitement spilling over as she helped baekhyun carefully arrange them in vases. you watched from the kitchen, your hands busy with dinner but your heart quietly swelling at the sight of them together.
dinner came and went in a blur of laughter and easy conversation. afterward, baekhyun insisted on helping clean up, minji trailing behind him like his little shadow. yet through it all, you couldn’t ignore the way his gaze lingered on you—soft, almost yearning. and every time you caught him, he’d quickly look away, his cheeks tinged with a hint of pink.
you tried to brush it off, convincing yourself it was nothing. that the bouquet meant nothing. but your heart betrayed you, skipping a beat every time your eyes met. your cheeks warmed under his gaze, though you told yourself it was absurd. he’s engaged, you reminded yourself firmly. he’s in love with someone else. it’s not you anymore. it hasn’t been for years.
later, baekhyun offered to get minji ready for bed, his enthusiasm lighting up the room. he approached each part of her bedtime routine with such care—a playful splash during her bath, patient encouragement as she brushed her teeth, and a warm smile as he read her a bedtime story.
you stood in the hallway, listening to her giggles and his gentle voice, your chest tightening with a mix of emotions you couldn’t quite name.
you walked back to the kitchen, the soft hum of the house wrapping around you as you reached for the wine bottle. the deep red liquid swirled as you poured it into two glasses, the rich aroma curling in the air. baekhyun had worked magic tonight, easing a rowdy toddler into sleep as if it were the simplest thing in the world. the image of him tucking minji in still lingered in your mind—a quiet smile on his face, his touch gentle but sure.
you thought about all the time you and minji had been spending with baekhyun lately felt like something out of a dream. it was everything you’d ever wished for but never thought you’d have. he slipped so seamlessly into her world, as if he’d always been there. their bond was undeniable—tickle fights that left her squealing with laughter, quiet moments where she leaned into him with absolute trust. watching them together only deepened the ache in your chest, the one that whispered how foolish you’d been to keep her from him for so long.
you told him as much one late afternoon, after a long stroll through the park. minji had fallen asleep in his arms, her little body spent from an afternoon of running through the playground while he chased her, pretending to be some silly monster. her tiny cheek squished against his shoulder, her breath soft and steady as she drooled onto his jacket. the two of you had laughed quietly, careful not to wake her.
“guess she’s making up for all the times it was you she drooled on instead,” he teased with a smirk, his voice warm and low.
it was in that fragile, golden moment that the words you’d been holding back tumbled out. “baekhyun, i... i’ve been feeling so awful. i’m not saying this for pity, i just—every time i see you with her, the guilt claws at me. i can’t believe i kept her from you for so long…i’m so sorry.”
your voice cracked, and then there were tears—hot, stinging, relentless.
baekhyun stopped in his tracks, his steps crunching against the gravel path as he gently grabbed your arm. his touch was firm but steady, grounding. he turned you to face him, his gaze steady, unwavering.
“hey,” he said softly, his voice pulling you out of your spiral. “what matters is now. and the future. i trust you, and i know you won’t keep her from me again. i’ve forgiven you... but maybe it’s time you forgave yourself.”
his words settled over you like a balm, soothing and unyielding, and for the first time in what felt like forever, the weight of your guilt began to feel a little lighter.
you’re pulled from your thoughts by the soft click of her bedroom door, the quiet shuffle of baekhyun’s steps filling the silence as he makes his way toward you. you know the sound of his walk so well, even after all these years. it’s comforting, familiar—the same measured rhythm, the same ease. in so many ways, he hasn’t changed. his laugh, his warm personality, the way his eyes crinkle into crescent moons when he smiles.
“she’s out,” he announces from the hallway, his voice soft but tinged with satisfaction as he spots you at the dining table.
you hand him the glass of wine you’d poured moments before, holding it out like a peace offering. “this is for all your hard work,” you tease, a light grin tugging at your lips.
he chuckles, the sound low and warm as he takes the glass from your hand, his fingers grazing yours for a fleeting second. the touch sends a jolt of electricity through you, unexpected but unmistakable, and you quickly avert your gaze, staring down at the table like it holds all the answers.
he settles into the chair beside you, close enough that you can feel the faint warmth radiating from him. you sip your wine, trying to steady yourself, before speaking. “so... have you and soo talked about setting up a time to meet her?”
his face shifts at the mention of her name. the change is subtle but telling—a flicker of discomfort, the kind you can’t unsee once you notice it.
“yeah,” he says after a pause, his fingers fidgeting with the stem of the wine glass. he takes a sip before continuing, his tone quieter now. “i actually wanted to talk to you about her.”
your heart sinks, unease settling in your chest like a stone. “oh?” you ask, cautious. “is everything okay?”
the worst thoughts swirl in your mind, a storm of possibilities. maybe she doesn’t want baekhyun spending time with minji. maybe she’s uncomfortable with you being part of the equation.
he exhales sharply, his thumb brushing against the rim of the glass. “yeah... i mean, i guess.” there’s a pause, a weight to his words that makes you hold your breath. “the engagement’s been called off.” his voice is steady, almost too steady, as if rehearsed.
your jaw drops before you can stop it. the shock is written all over your face, and baekhyun winces at your reaction, his gaze darting away. you quickly compose yourself, snapping your mouth shut as heat rises to your cheeks. “what happened?” you blurt, the words spilling out before you can think twice. “you seemed... so happy.”
your voice falters, and for a moment, you wonder if you’ve overstepped. the weight of your question lingers between you, heavy and unspoken, and you brace yourself for whatever comes next.
“i was. or... at least, i thought i was,” he says, his voice low and almost hesitant, as if he’s afraid to admit it even to himself. his hand moves to his hair, ruffling it in that familiar way he always did when the weight of his thoughts pressed too hard on him. a reflex, a habit you never forgot.
“and then you walked back into my life.” his voice is quiet, but there’s a rawness to it, like he’s pulling the words straight from the deepest part of him. your breath hitches, the air between you growing unbearably still as his gaze locks onto yours. there’s something in his eyes—something aching, desperate, like he’s trying to hold himself together while unraveling all at once.
“with her,” he continues, his voice breaking just enough to make your chest tighten, “this little girl who’s... everything. everything i didn’t know i was missing. she’s you and me, all tangled up in the most perfect way.” he swallows hard, his jaw clenching as though he’s fighting to steady himself. “and suddenly, nothing else makes sense anymore. not without you. not without her.”
the moment those words left his lips, the air seemed to shift. everything stilled—the hum of the world faded into silence, leaving only the thunderous echo of your heartbeat in your ears. had he really said that? the words hung between you, raw and unguarded, threatening to unravel everything you thought you understood.
his eyes searched yours, hesitant but resolute, as if willing you to see the truth in his gaze. when he spoke again, his voice softened, carrying a weight that made your breath hitch. “and the more time i spent with you both... the more i realized you’re what i want. you and minji. you’re what i really want in my life.”
his confession hit you with the force of a tidal wave, knocking the air from your lungs. you felt the ground tilt beneath you, the walls you’d carefully built around your heart quaking under the pressure of his words.
“baekhyun…” you whispered, your voice barely audible, your chest tightening as you forced yourself to ask, “are you… are you serious?”
but you already knew the answer. you could see it, clear as day, in the way his gaze didn’t waver.
“we can take our time… start slow,” baekhyun exhales, his voice carrying the weight of his confession as if it had been lodged in his chest for years. the vulnerability in his tone is raw, unguarded, and it almost makes you forget to breathe. “i mean… if that’s what you want, too.”
his words trail off, and for a moment, his usual confidence falters. a quiet doubt creeps into his thoughts—what if you’ve moved on? what if you don’t want this? the possibility churns in his mind, making him feel smaller, suddenly unsure.
“sorry,” he blurts out, shaking his head, gaze dropping to the floor. “i shouldn’t have said that—”
“no,” you interrupt, your voice firm but gentle, grounding him. your hand finds his, your fingers curling around his in a touch that feels achingly familiar, as though no time has passed. the warmth of his skin against yours sends a spark racing through your veins, a reassurance you didn’t realize you both needed.
he looks up, his eyes wide with hesitation, and you hold his gaze. “i’d… actually like that,” you admit, your voice softer now, a smile tugging at your lips. “start slow and see where we go.”
his shoulders visibly relax, and the faintest glimmer of hope flickers in his eyes. he squeezes your hand, his thumb brushing over your knuckles, and for the first time in a long time, it feels like the two of you are stepping into something whole and unbroken.
two weeks later, you stood in front of your closet, the door wide open and a growing pile of discarded clothes spilling onto the floor.
you were getting ready for a date.
with baekhyun.
your first date as parents.
the thought made your stomach flip with nerves and excitement. it felt surreal, almost like stepping into a story you didn’t dare dream for yourself. but as much as the idea of this new beginning thrilled you, the reality of your wardrobe—or lack thereof—was starting to feel like a nightmare.
minji was spending the evening with chanyeol and nari, her overnight bag already packed and slung over chanyeol’s shoulder when he came to pick her up. you couldn’t miss the way his expression shifted when you told him the reason for the favor, his smile faltering for the briefest second.
“it’s just dinner,” you’d explained softly. “we’re taking things slow, seeing where it goes.”
chanyeol had nodded, his lips pressing into a tight line. he couldn’t quite mask the pain in his eyes, though he tried.
“of course,” he’d said eventually, his voice steady despite the storm you could feel brewing beneath. “you know i’m always here for you…and minji.”
because that was just who chanyeol was—a steady, selfless anchor, even when it hurt.
now, as you tore through hangers and drawers, you glanced at your phone, a spike of panic shooting through you. less than two hours. how had the time slipped away so fast?
you groaned, flopping onto your bed as you stared at the heap of options that just weren’t right. nothing screamed ‘first date with the father of your child.’ nothing said ‘i’m nervous but excited and maybe a little terrified but i also want to look stunning.’
baekhyun.
you imagined the moment baekhyun would arrive, the image of him clear in your mind as if he were already standing at your door. he’d look effortlessly polished, the way only he could manage—like he’d stepped out of a magazine without even trying. his shirt would probably hug his lean frame just right, the soft fabric teasing at the lines of his shoulders and chest. his hair, always perfectly imperfect, would fall into place with a casualness that made you suspect he’d only run his fingers through it once before heading out.
and then there were his eyes—those warm, honeyed depths that had a way of making the world feel quieter, smaller. they carried a quiet determination now, a depth that hadn’t always been there, like the years apart had reshaped him, sharpened his focus. you could almost see the subtle tilt of his lips when he caught sight of you, a smile that wasn’t overly practiced but natural, like it belonged there because you did.
he never needed much time to get ready, and yet he always looked like he did. that was the thing about baekhyun—everything about him was easy, seamless, like he existed in his own effortless rhythm. it wasn’t about the clothes he chose or the way he styled his hair; it was about the energy he carried, the quiet confidence that drew people in.
and tonight, he’d be coming to pick you up—not just as the baekhyun you’d known before, but as someone determined to start fresh, someone who wanted to show you that maybe, just maybe, this could really work out.
you exhaled deeply, steadying yourself as you slid off the bed. pull it together, you thought, brushing your curled hair out of your face. tonight wasn’t just another evening—it felt like the start of something new, something tentative and hopeful, and you wanted to look the part. not just for baekhyun, but for yourself. you wanted to feel like the best version of you—the woman you were before, and the woman you were becoming.
your eyes drifted toward the top of your closet, where an old, forgotten box rested among stacks of seasonal items and spare blankets. a spark of hope flickered. you vaguely remembered stuffing your pre-pregnancy clothes up there, unable to let them go but convinced they might never fit again. now, that box felt like a treasure chest waiting to be rediscovered.
grabbing a step ladder, you climbed carefully, brushing the thick layer of dust from the box’s lid before tugging it down. a cloud of nostalgia seemed to escape as you peeled it open. there they were—rows of fabrics, textures, and memories you hadn’t touched in years. silky blouses, form-fitting dresses, sleek skirts... all the outfits you used to wear when going out felt like a second skin.
you sifted through them, piece by piece, fingers grazing over familiar fabrics as your heart swelled with a mix of apprehension and excitement. you pulled out a sleek dress, holding it up against yourself in the mirror. to your delight—and a little disbelief—it still fit, hugging your post-pregnancy curves in ways that made you feel both proud and beautiful.
you were finishing the last touches on your hair and makeup when the doorbell rang, slicing through the air like a sudden jolt. a flutter of butterflies stirred in your stomach, their wings beating furiously as nerves surged through you all at once. instinctively, you reached for your perfume, spritzing it lightly over your neck, the familiar scent wrapping around you like a soft, comforting embrace.
you took a long, steadying breath, eyes tracing your reflection in the mirror, checking every detail—the delicate curve of your lashes, the soft glow of your skin, the way your lips curved just right. you stepped back, allowing yourself a moment to really see the woman in front of you. had it really been so long since you dressed up like this? for anyone? the question lingered in the air.
and then it hit you, clear as day. it had been since baekhyun. a quiet chuckle escaped your lips as you shook your head, bemused by the realization. there was something about tonight that felt different, something about this moment, this new chapter, that made everything feel... significant.
with a final glance at your reflection, you straightened up, a soft smile tugging at the corners of your lips. you walked toward the door, each step a little more deliberate, a little more full of purpose. this wasn’t just a date. this was something else entirely.
when the door swung open and baekhyun saw you, his breath hitched, the air suddenly too thick to pull into his lungs. his gaze swept over you, deliberate and slow, as if his mind needed time to register every curve, every detail, every shimmer of the fabric that clung to you. his heart thundered in his chest, a wild rhythm he couldn’t control, and for a moment, all he could do was stare.
you were devastating. the dress—that dress—hugged you perfectly, its soft sheen catching the dim hallway light, every subtle movement making it seem alive, as though it had been designed for this exact moment. it was the same one you’d worn before, in a memory he kept locked away for years. back then, you’d twirled in front of him, laughing, your joy so infectious it had carved itself into his soul. seeing it again now, seeing you now, was almost too much.
but this wasn’t just a walk down memory lane. this wasn’t then. everything was different now—he was different, you were different. yet, somehow, that pull between you felt as raw and undeniable as it had the first time he’d laid eyes on you.
except now, you weren’t just the girl he’d loved with everything in him, the girl he’d lost, the girl he thought he’d never have again. you were minji’s mother. his daughter’s mother. and seeing you like this—so stunning it almost hurt—sent a new kind of longing through him. it wasn’t just want, though god, he wanted you. it was need, aching and all-consuming, a yearning that went far beyond physical desire. he needed to prove himself, to prove that he could be more for you, for minji. that this time, he wouldn’t let you slip away.
his hands twitched at his sides, desperate to reach for you, to touch, to hold, to pull you close enough to feel the warmth of your body against his. the temptation was staggering, nearly unbearable. his mind flickered with flashes of all the ways he wanted you—how it would feel to bury his face in your neck, to whisper promises against your skin, to hear you say his name like you used to.
but he held himself back, swallowing hard, locking it all down. not now. he couldn’t rush this. he couldn’t risk ruining it.
when his eyes met yours, his lips curved into the softest of smiles, one that didn’t quite mask the storm of emotions swirling beneath the surface. “you…” he paused, his voice catching before he found it again. “you look incredible.” the words came out low, steady, but there was no mistaking the weight behind them.
for a brief second, his eyes dropped back to the dress, his mind betraying him with an image of it lying forgotten on the floor, of you in his arms, of everything he was fighting to keep at bay. the thought made his chest tighten, and he let out a soft chuckle, as if to diffuse the tension he felt coiled so tightly within him.
but he didn’t move. not yet. instead, he let the moment stretch, imagining the day when he wouldn’t have to hold back, when he wouldn’t have to hesitate. when he could love you the way he wanted to—completely, without fear, without doubt, without restraint.
after dinner, the two of you strolled back to your place, the night humming with the warmth of shared laughter and lingering glances. the soft glow of streetlights cast a golden sheen over everything, making the world feel dreamlike, almost suspended in time. the wine coursing through your veins made the air lighter, the edges of reality softer, as though nothing truly mattered except the man walking beside you.
when you reached the door, your fingers fumbled with the keys, the metal slipping awkwardly in your grasp. you giggled, a sound so sweet it made baekhyun’s chest tighten. he stood behind you, his presence warm and steady, his hands gently finding their way to your waist. his touch was light, but it burned in the most delicious way.
“need a hand?” he asked, his voice low, teasing, his breath grazing your ear as he leaned closer.
you turned your head just slightly, your smile playful. “please,” you murmured, trying—and failing—to mask the way his closeness made your pulse quicken.
together, you managed to coax the door open, his hand guiding yours with a deliberate slowness that made you shiver. once inside, he closed the door behind him with a quiet click, the sound reverberating through the stillness of the space.
“nightcap?” you asked, your tone casual, though the mischief in your eyes betrayed you. your cheeks were warm, not just from the wine but from the way his gaze lingered, heavy and intent.
baekhyun didn’t answer right away. his eyes stayed locked on you, tracing the curve of your cheek, the way your lips curled into that familiar, teasing grin. his gaze dipped lower, lingering on the dress that clung to you like a second skin. that dress. the one he couldn’t stop thinking about all night, the one he wanted to peel off you with his teeth.
he swallowed hard, his jaw tightening as he fought to keep himself in check. the air between you thickened, crackling with an unspoken tension. he took a slow, deliberate step closer, the movement barely noticeable, but the way his eyes darkened said everything his lips couldn’t.
“yeah,” he finally murmured, his voice low, rough around the edges. “a nightcap sounds good.”
but it wasn’t the drink he wanted. no, the only thing he wanted was standing right in front of him, flushed and radiant, looking at him with eyes that could undo him in a heartbeat. every instinct screamed at him to close the space, to kiss you breathless, to pull you into him and never let go. but he didn’t. not yet. he was holding onto a thread of control, as thin and fragile as the air between you.
for now, he could wait. but god, you were making it impossible.
he could barely hold himself together, his self-control stretched thinner with each passing second. honestly, he deserved an award—no, a damn medal—for the composure he managed to keep throughout dinner. every moment was its own quiet war, every glance from you a calculated blow, every soft laugh a fatal shot to his already fragile defenses. your presence was a sweet, maddening intoxication, pulling him under in waves he couldn’t escape.
the way you looked at him—those eyes full of something gentle, something tender, something that felt like home—was almost his undoing. his fingers curled tightly against his thighs, his knuckles blanching as he fought the urge to reach for you. your smile, radiant and unguarded, had him aching in ways he thought he’d forgotten, stirring something raw and desperate in the pit of his stomach. and your voice—god, your voice—danced through the air, warm and melodic, like the first song he’d ever loved.
and then there were those moments when you looked at him, really looked at him. it was in the softness of your gaze, the way it lingered a second too long, the way it stripped him bare without a single word. it was as if you still saw him—truly saw him—the way you used to, back when you were his. that look, full of unspoken truths, clung to him like an echo, whispering things he didn’t dare hope for. you still love me. you still love me. the thought struck like lightning, leaving him dazed and breathless, his pulse thundering in his ears.
his chest tightened with the weight of it all—the yearning, the disbelief, the sheer impossibility of the moment. it was as though everything that had gone wrong, all the time that had stretched between you, suddenly dissolved, rendered meaningless in the face of this. it was just the two of you now, the world fading into a blurry background, holding its breath as if waiting for him to do what every fiber of his being screamed for: close the distance.
the need was relentless, searing through him like fire. his fingers twitched with the urge to touch you, to cradle your face in his hands and trace the contours of your cheek, to see if your skin still felt as soft as he remembered. his lips burned with the craving to kiss you, to taste the laughter that had tormented him all night, to claim the love he had been starving for since the day you walked away.
it had been almost four agonizing years since you left him behind, taking the light of his world with you. he thought he’d buried the pain, that he’d learned to live with the emptiness you left. but now, here you were, so close he could hear the rhythm of your breaths, feel the warmth radiating from your skin. and he realized with a clarity that stole the air from his lungs: none of that pain mattered anymore. not the silence, not the heartbreak, not the years. all that mattered was you—here, now, in front of him.
his breath hitched at the thought, and he found himself imagining what it would feel like when he finally kissed you again. his lips hovering just inches from yours, the space between you crackling with tension. he could already feel the pull, that same magnetic connection that had always been there, waiting for the moment he could touch you. and when their lips finally met, he knew—he knew—it would be just like before. that same sweetness, that same softness, the curve of your lips fitting perfectly against his, like you were always meant to belong to him.
no one had ever kissed him the way you did. no one else had ever left him breathless, drowning in the intensity of it, as if your kiss had the power to remake him. and god, he wanted it again. needed it.
he wanted you, wanted you so badly, the need pooling in his chest, a hot, tight ache he couldn’t ignore. he could already taste you, feel the warmth of your lips beneath his. he remembered how your kiss had once made him feel weightless, like he was falling into something beautiful, intoxicating. it was all he’d thought about the entire night.
and the way you looked now, that dress clinging to you like it had all those years ago, just made him ache even more. he couldn’t stop the images running through his mind—ripping it off of you, feeling your body pressed against his, tasting the sweetness of your kiss once again, just like he had done so many times before. the desire to feel you underneath him, to bury himself in the softness of you, was almost unbearable. he wanted it. he wanted you.
but instead, he nodded, swallowing the lump in his throat. “yeah,” he breathed, his voice thick with barely contained longing, “yeah, a nightcap sounds good.”
his fingers twitched, wanting nothing more than to touch you, but he held himself back, feeling the heat rise between you both, a tension so thick it was almost unbearable.
"here, let me pour the drinks for us," he murmured, his voice low and steady as he took your jacket and purse, hanging them with a quiet care on the coat rack.
you raised an eyebrow, teasing, "oh?" the corners of your lips twitched, fighting back a smile as you bit your bottom lip. your lashes fluttered lightly, casting delicate shadows across your cheeks as you met his gaze. "i’m just getting spoiled tonight, aren’t i?" you teased, the memory of how he'd practically wrestled the check from your hands earlier still fresh in your mind. it made you laugh softly, a sound that seemed to melt into the air.
but before you could say anything more, he was there, his hand coming up instinctively to cup your cheek. the warmth of his touch sent a shiver down your spine, his thumb brushing lightly against the softness of your skin, tracing the curve of your cheek, your chin, and finally resting just below your lower lip. his touch was so gentle, so deliberate, and yet it stirred something deeper inside you—a quiet yearning that you were both trying to contain.
you met his eyes, searching his face, knowing the unspoken truth before he even voiced it. you could see it—the way his gaze lingered, the way his breath hitched just slightly as he studied you. he wanted to kiss you. you could feel the tension rising, thick and palpable between you, but still, he held back, the weight of restraint pressing on him.
not wanting to push him, you offered him a sweet, reassuring smile, the kind that spoke of understanding without words. the sight of it seemed to stop him in his tracks, and his heart skipped a beat, his breath catching in his throat.
baekhyun’s lips curved into a playful smirk. “spoiled?” he echoed, leaning in just slightly, enough for his voice to drop a fraction, rich and smooth. “c’mon, bun, i’m sure you remember what me spoiling you really looks like.”
his words hit like a soft nudge to a locked door, memories rushing in before you could stop them. you remembered the way he used to spoil you relentlessly back in college, how his love language seemed to be written in lavish gifts and thoughtful gestures. designer handbags you could never justify buying for yourself, delicate jewelry that always seemed to match the sparkle in his eyes when he fastened the clasps himself.
he’d surprise you with new outfits for events you didn’t even know you’d be attending until he planned them—your wardrobe practically transformed by his generosity. every time the newest iphone dropped, he’d make sure it was in your hands within days, complete with a customized case he knew you’d love. he’d slip his card to waiters or store clerks before you could even think to pay.
and then there were the practical things, like covering your car payments or arranging maintenance before you even realized you needed it, his way of taking care of you without ever making you feel small for it. he never wanted you to stress, and you’d laugh at the absurdity of it all while secretly melting at the way he seemed to know what you needed before you did.
baekhyun had money. plenty of it. his family’s wealth wasn’t something he flaunted, but it was there, shaping the way he provided for you. your family wasn’t poor, but you didn’t have the same financial ease. you worked hard for the things you had, but baekhyun never made you feel less than, never made you uncomfortable about it. his quiet humility and the way he never flaunted his wealth made it all feel normal—money was never the issue. it was always about the love you shared.
you swallowed hard, heat creeping up your neck as you met his gaze again. his eyes were on you now, softer but still teasing, as if he could tell exactly where your thoughts had gone. “besides” he murmured, brushing a loose strand of hair from your face, his touch lingering just a moment longer than necessary. “i’m just making up for lost time. can you blame me?”
one glass turned into two, then three, each sip loosening the tension in the air, but also building something new between you, something heady and electric. laughter spilled from your lips, the sound light and careless, but underneath it, a growing warmth that neither of you could ignore. the night seemed to blur around the edges, the wine clouding your thoughts, making everything softer, more daring.
the bottles emptied one by one, their presence a witness to the hours that had melted away as you lingered in each other’s company. the glasses tipped over, forgotten, their contents pooling on the floor like spilled memories. it didn’t matter. nothing mattered except the way he looked at you—intensely, as if every part of him was drawn to you in a way that left him no choice but to pull you closer.
and then, he kissed you.
it was slow at first, almost tentative, like he was relearning the shape of your lips, the rhythm of your breath. but it didn’t stay that way for long. in an instant, the kiss deepened, the years of separation melting into a blur of heat and urgency. his hands found your waist, pulling you closer—closer, until you were climbing into his lap, your legs straddling him without hesitation.
his mouth was scorching, addictive, just like you remembered. it was the taste of him, rich like wine but unmistakably him—a flavor you thought you’d buried, but now you realized you could never forget. his kisses were messy, hungry, each one leaving you breathless as soft moans and breathless whimpers slipped between you. his hands roamed with purpose, sliding down to cup your ass, pulling you flush against him. his grip was firm, possessive, so achingly familiar that it made your head spin.
you felt the growing bulge beneath you, hard and urgent, straining against his pants. the pressure sent a sharp jolt of need straight to your core, igniting a fire you couldn’t ignore. warmth pooled between your legs, soaking you as your hips rocked instinctively against him. a deep, guttural groan escaped him, vibrating against your lips as you kissed him harder, hungrier.
“i missed you,” you breathed, the words tumbling from your lips as they traveled to the curve of his neck. you nipped at the sensitive skin below his ear, the spot you knew drove him wild. sure enough, a soft, desperate moan spilled from him, and you smiled against his skin, savoring the sound of him unraveling beneath you.
"i love you, bun," he whispered, his voice soft yet heavy with meaning, a tremor of raw emotion in every word. his gaze, unwavering and intense, locked onto yours, as if he could reach inside you with just a look. his lips brushed yours, so lightly it almost felt like a delicate promise. "i... i don’t think i ever stopped."
the words crashed into you, like a wave breaking against the shore, unexpected yet inevitable. your heart skipped, breath caught in your chest as the depth of his confession wrapped around you, pulling you under. "i love you, too, baekhyun," you breathed, your voice barely more than a whisper, but steady—anchored in the truth that had always been there, buried beneath the years of silence. "i never stopped."
and then, his lips were on yours again, and it was as if the world snapped back into place, the pieces aligning with the force of your shared confession. finally, it felt like home. like you were where you were always meant to be. your body responded instinctively, moving closer, desperate to feel the heat that had always simmered between you two. you ground against him, slow, deliberate, an aching need rising in you both. the friction between you sent jolts of electricity through your veins, a fire sparking to life as you felt him tense beneath you, his hands tightening on your hips.
for a brief moment, you thought he'd pull you in fully, lose himself in the moment as much as you were. but instead, his body went rigid, stilling beneath you as if every muscle had locked in place.
"wait—" his voice cracked, the sound thick with a dangerous mix of yearning and restraint. his hands stilled your movements, holding you in place. you could feel his chest rise and fall beneath you, shallow breaths betraying the storm inside him. "i don’t want to pressure you into anything you’re not ready for. i know we agreed to take things slow. i can wait."
his words cut through the haze of your desire, stopping you dead in your tracks. the sincerity in his eyes hit you like a tidal wave. he was holding back—for you.
for you.
the ache in your chest was sharp, but in the best possible way.
without saying a word, you reached down, sliding his hand beneath your dress, guiding him to where you were already burning. his breath caught when his fingers brushed against your bare skin. his eyes widened, shock crossing his features as he realized you weren’t wearing anything underneath.
"feel how wet you’ve made me?" you whispered, your lips grazing his ear, your voice low, sultry, teasing. the way his chest moves as his breathing becomes more deeper, heavier as if it’s taking everything in him not to put his fingers to work on that sloppy cunt of yours. you could feel his restraint fraying, and you couldn’t help but smile.
"still think i wanna take things slow?" you teased, your thumb tracing the curve of his bottom lip, urging him to act.
you could feel his body tremble under your touch, his hands shaking slightly as he adjusted, his fingers just barely grazing where you needed him most. the hunger in his eyes was almost unbearable, and you leaned in closer, brushing your lips over his jaw, waiting for him to break.
his composure shattered. his eyes fluttered shut as you brought his slick-coated fingers to your mouth, your tongue swirling around them slowly, deliberately. the taste of yourself on him was heady, and you sucked his fingers clean, the act sending a shiver down his spine.
“fuck,” he groaned, his voice thick with hunger. “ya sure about this, bun?” each syllable a desperate plea as his restraint teetered dangerously close to breaking.
you nodded, eyes wide and shimmering with a mix of innocence and promise. your lashes fluttered like the softest caress as you looked up at him, lips swollen and bruised from his fevered kisses, a delicate pout lingering on them. the sight of made his dick twitch. “always been sure when it comes to you, baek.”
the words hit him like a wave, and with a shuddering sigh, he couldn’t hold back anymore. his lips crashed against yours, possessive and hungry, claiming you as if he’d never get another chance. one arm wrapped around your head, fingers threading through your hair with a desperate need, while the other hand slid to your ass, squeezing it roughly. his grip tightened, a subtle warning, but you could feel the way his muscles strained, the raw tension in his touch. every press of his fingers into your skin felt like a brand, like he was marking you, anchoring himself to you. his touch was a blaze, a wildfire that scorched you in the best way, pulling you closer as if he couldn’t bear an inch of distance.
and then the world tilted.
with a surge of power and urgency, he lifted you without hesitation—strong, commanding, as though he was claiming you in the most primal of ways. a breathless gasp escaped your lips, the sound of surprise barely escaping before his hands cradled you, holding you as if you were made of something more fragile than glass. he held you with reverence, but there was an edge to it, a possessiveness that promised he would never let you go.
his breath is heavy against your neck, warm and uneven, betraying the restraint he’s barely holding onto. your body is pressed tightly to his chest, his heart pounding against yours, every beat echoing the unspoken promises that linger in the air. each step he takes toward your bedroom is deliberate, charged, as though the distance is unbearable, as if he can’t get you there fast enough.
"shit," he muttered, his voice rough and low as he lowered you onto the edge of your bed. the realization hit him like a tidal wave, cold and relentless, stealing his focus. his gaze flickered to yours, a storm of panic swirling in his eyes. “i didn’t bring any condoms. do you… do you have any?”
his question lingered in the air, heavy and unspoken, cutting deeper than the surface. the knot in his stomach tightened, the thought of someone else touching you during the time apart clawing at his insides. he hated the idea more than he cared to admit.
your laughter cut through the tension, soft but laced with something playful, a gentle ring that seemed to fill the space between you. "no, baek," you replied, your voice a breathless melody. "i haven’t had sex—well, any action, really—since you." the confession slipped out before you could stop it, and though a blush bloomed on your cheeks, you held his gaze. there was a flicker of vulnerability in your eyes, but it only made his heart race faster.
his breath hitched audibly, and for a moment, the world seemed to stop. his heartbeat thundered in his ears, his chest rising and falling with the weight of your words. “you’re serious?” he whispered, disbelief laced with something else—pride. his lips curved upward into a slow, cocky grin, the kind that made your stomach flip. the thought of you untouched by anyone else since him fed something primal, something possessive.
you nodded, your teeth sinking into your lip like you were weighing the impact of your words. embarrassment rushed to your neck, but it was quickly replaced by the heat of his stare. it burned through you, molten and unwavering, making your heart thrum harder with every passing second.
“fuck,” he rasped, the word almost guttural, like he couldn’t contain the surge of raw emotion. it was your turn to smile, a cocky glint lighting up your eyes. but when he spoke again, the weight of his confession hit you harder than you expected.
"i haven’t gone raw in anyone since you."
the words hung heavy in the air, suffocating with meaning. the way he said it, so casually, like it was a fact that only made sense in the world he had built around you, made your pulse spike. it was everything—the promise, the truth. your knees weakened at the depth of his gaze, molten like a fire you couldn’t escape.
"d’ya trust me, bun?" he whispered, voice low, the words slipping from his lips with a possessive kind of hunger.
you swallowed thickly, your breath coming out uneven, heart pounding in your throat. your pulse raced, and despite the weight of his question, you somehow found your voice, breathless and full of raw honesty.
“with my life.”
his lips curled into that signature, boyish grin that had always undone you, a glint of mischief dancing in his darkened eyes.
without hesitation, he closed the distance between you, his hands brushing the smooth, delicate skin of your arms before they drifted to the zipper at your back. in one seamless motion, his fingers tugged at the fabric, pulling your dress down with a fluid grace that seemed almost too effortless, as if he’d done it a thousand times before. the fabric slid off you like a memory, slipping to the floor as he guided you back onto the pillows, leaving you bare under the weight of his gaze.
his breath faltered as he drank you in, his eyes tracing every inch of your skin, the intensity of his hunger for you pressing against him like an ache that made his chest tighten. "god," he breathed out, the word barely escaping his lips as if he was speaking to himself more than to you, his hands gently exploring your exposed body like he was memorizing it, as though each touch could never be repeated.
but then it came—the surge of insecurity, creeping in from the edges of your mind like a dark cloud, unwelcome and cold. without thinking, you crossed your arms over your body, your hands instinctively covering the soft curves you’d learned to live with, but had never quite come to accept.
baekhyun saw it instantly. the shift in you, the way you tried to pull away, to hide. his expression softened, his gaze darkening with understanding as he stepped closer. his voice, low and steady, was a balm to your wounded confidence. “don’t you ever feel the need to hide from me,” he murmured, each word laced with an unspoken promise. his hands were gentle, yet firm, as he took hold of your wrists, slowly guiding them away from your body and placing them at your sides. the weight of his touch was reassuring, a silent command for you to trust him, to trust that he saw you—all of you—and that was all he wanted.
his touch was almost ethereal, like a whisper against your skin. his fingertips grazed the curve of your breasts, lingering just long enough to make your breath hitch. “bigger,” he murmured, the word thick with admiration, as if discovering something new about you—something he’d always known he wanted. his hands traveled lower, tracing the lines of your waist, feeling the soft expansion of your hips beneath his palms.
when his fingers brushed over the subtle stretch marks on your ass, a low, guttural groan escaped him, the sound vibrating through the air between you. his body tensed, his desire unmistakable, radiating off of him in waves. “god, you’re so beautiful,” he said, his gaze never leaving the soft, inviting shape of your body, as if memorizing every inch of you.
his hand drifted to your stomach, his finger moving with slow deliberation, drawing a path down the center of your abdomen, a slow, torturous line that set your nerves alight. “you’re gonna feel me,” he rasped, his voice husky, the words carrying a weight of promise. his thumb pressed gently into the sensitive skin just above your belly button, sending a shiver spiraling through your body. “right here,” he murmured, his eyes locking with yours—dark, smoldering, intense with intent.
the teasing, the way he looked at you like you were something precious, something intoxicating—it was too much. your hands clenched at the fabric of his shirt, tugging him closer, the need to feel him overwhelming. without a second thought, your lips crashed against his, urgent and desperate. the kiss was hungry, frantic, your mouths pressing against each other as you fumbled with the fabric of his clothes, your body burning for more.
his laugh rumbled against your lips, the sound low and rich as he pulled back just enough to smirk down at you. “eager, aren’t we?”
you didn’t miss a beat, your fingers working at his waistband as you bit back, “just wanna see if you still know how to fuck me properly.”
his laugh deepened, full and throaty, as he shoved his boxers down, freeing his throbbing cock. “glad to see that smart mouth of yours hasn’t changed, bun,” he said, his grin wicked. he leaned in, his lips brushing your ear as he added, “i’ma have fun puttin’ it to good use later.”
your breath hitched, your heart pounding in anticipation as he pressed closer, the weight of his words and his presence igniting every nerve in your body.
he positions himself at your entrance, and your breath catches in your throat, heart pounding so hard you can feel it echo in your ears. the heat radiating from him, the subtle brush of his skin against yours, sends a shiver rippling through your body. his tip, swollen and leaking, nudges against you, dragging slowly through your wetness, teasing with a precision that makes your toes curl.
he lingers at your entrance, just barely pressing in before retreating, spreading his precum and your slick together in a maddening rhythm. the sensation of his velvety tip gliding over your folds, grazing your clit, sends jolts of pleasure through your core. every deliberate movement feels like a silent taunt, a reminder of how much he’s savoring this moment—savoring you.
“baek, please,” you whimper, your voice trembling, desperate. your fingers clutch the sheets beneath you, nails digging in as if grounding yourself could somehow stave off the overwhelming need building inside you. tears prickle at the corners of your eyes, blurring your vision as the relentless teasing pushes you closer to the edge of begging.
his own restraint is fraying, evident in the way his breath hitches, the way his hands tremble slightly as they grip your hips. he leans down, his forehead resting against yours, his dark eyes smoldering with a mix of lust and longing. “oh— fffuuuccck, i missed you,” he groans, his voice strained, thick with emotion and need.
his words barely register before he begins to push in, his throbbing tip stretching you inch by agonizing inch. the sensation of him filling you—so warm, so familiar yet impossibly intense—forces a soft gasp from your lips. he exhales sharply, his jaw clenched, savoring every second, every sensation, as though this moment is the only thing that matters in the world.
baekhyun’s gaze flickers to your face, catching the faint wince that creases your features, gone as quickly as it came, but not quick enough to escape him. his brows knit together, his concern palpable, etched into the soft lines of his expression. he stays perfectly still, his body taut with restraint, as if afraid to move and hurt you. the stretch stings, yes, but there’s something deeper beneath it—a delicious burn that ignites every nerve, leaving you teetering on the edge of pain and pleasure.
“baby, you good?” his voice is low, soft, a husky murmur that wraps around you like the warmest comfort, his tone threading worry with tenderness, his concern a steady anchor in the haze between you. his dark eyes search yours, flickering with a mix of restraint and hunger, like he’s balancing on the precipice of losing control but refusing to let it happen until you’re ready.
you nod, though your breath catches, a sharp inhale that betrays the lingering ache as you will yourself to adjust. you shift your hips slightly, testing, feeling the stretch give way to something deeper, something raw that tugs at your core and sets your pulse hammering.
he groans, low and guttural, a sound dragged from the depths of his chest as he feels you take him in just a little more. his breath stutters, breaking like a thread pulled too tight, his hands flexing where they rest on your hips. the sharp ache dissolves into heat, into a magnetic pull you can’t resist. his reaction tells you he’s just as wrecked as you are, caught in the unbearable tension of holding back when everything about this moment demands he let go.
baekhyun’s exhale shudders, his head tipping back as his grip on your hips tightens just enough to remind you of his control. “fuck,” he rasps, the word rough and shaky, his voice carrying a mix of awe and restraint. “i missed the way you feel around me.”
his words send a ripple of heat through you, raw and unfiltered, a confession of just how much you’re undoing him. his fingers dig into your skin, grounding him, though his gaze never strays from yours. the tension coils tighter with every passing second, his dark eyes blazing with something possessive, something unrelenting, as though he’s holding back the storm brewing just beneath the surface.
your need burns hotter, desperation clawing its way to the forefront. “baekhyun—,” you beg, the words tumbling out before you can catch them. “please... just hurry up and fuck me.”
the plea comes out shaky, your voice trembling with want, and for a moment, you feel utterly exposed. but the effect on him is instant. his lips curl into a slow, wicked smile, his expression one of pure, devastating control as if that's all he needed to hear. “as you wish, sweetheart,” he grunts, his voice thick with promise and unrestrained desire.
his hands tighten their hold on your hips, strong and commanding, as he shifts his position. with a flex of his arms, he lifts you with effortless strength, your body rising until you can feel the head of his cock stretching you once more. the tension builds, unbearable and heady, before he slams you down onto him in one fluid motion.
the force of it steals the breath from your lungs, the intensity of him filling you completely, stretching you to your limit. the sound that escapes you is ragged, a cry of pleasure that seems to echo in the air between you. baekhyun’s growl rumbles low in his chest, primal and rough, as his hips meet yours, bottoming out with a precision that leaves you trembling.
his movements are deliberate yet feral, each thrust pushing you closer to the edge, his hands never leaving your body as if anchoring you to him. his need is palpable, pouring out in every motion, every flex of his muscles as he claims you with an intensity that sets every nerve ending alight.
“ya feel so fuckin’ perfect,” he groans against your skin, the words muffled but soaked in reverence as his lips press to your shoulder, your neck, anywhere he can reach. every motion, every sound, every touch pulls you deeper into him, blurring the lines between where you end and he begins.
he missed you. god, every inch of him missed you. it’s like his cock remembers every curve, every slick ridge of your walls, molding to him perfectly. and of course, he lets you know, his voice breaking into a string of desperate confessions. “f-fuck… m’sorry. ya squeezin’ me so tight. i think ‘m gonna cum soon hah– and ‘m gonna fuck it right back into this perfect—ngh—cunt.”
“hah—baek,” you whine, your voice trembling as you fully surrender to him. your body rocks helplessly in rhythm with his relentless thrusts, his cock plunging so deep it leaves you gasping. “s-so deep—hngh… can feel you here—” your hand snakes down, guiding his to press against your stomach, right where the swollen head of his cock is relentlessly hitting that devastatingly sweet spot.
his breath hitches, a low, disbelieving laugh huffing out as his fingers press into your skin. “fuck,” he groans, his eyes dark with lust, fixed on you, utterly wrecked beneath him. his hand is on top of the other as they press down over the slight bulge where he’s buried so deeply inside you. “feel that, baby? that’s me… stretching this pretty pussy out so good.”
his words send a fresh wave of heat coursing through you, and it’s too much—all of it, the weight of him, the filthy praise falling from his lips, the way his hands grip you like you’re something precious, even as he loses himself in you.
“baek—oh god!” your cry echoes through the room as your body shatters beneath him, the first orgasm of the night ripping through you with a force that leaves you trembling. his lips crash against yours, swallowing your desperate moans as his hand moves lower, fingers finding your clit in quick, precise circles. the overstimulation sends sparks shooting through your veins, the pleasure stretching, elongating, as he coaxes every last wave from you.
“that’s it—hah. cum for me angel,” he murmurs against your lips, his voice softening even as his hips keep their punishing rhythm, chasing his own release. “y'so perfect, baby. nngghh—so fuckin' perfect for me…and finally mine again.”
“been y-yours,” you hiss, dragging out the word as his crazed tip whacks itself against your sensitive spot. again, again, and again—he’s hitting against that same spot as if it were a target and he never misses. his frantic hits against your core causes your toes to curl and your back to arch even further as you’re slowly being brought closer to your orgasmic, teetering edge. “ffuuck! ‘m cumming again, baek, cumming.”
your release crashes over you like a tidal wave, sweeping you into a realm that feels like heaven itself. your body gives out beneath the intensity, collapsing back against the mattress as baekhyun hovers over you, his breath hot and heavy. his tongue trails a slick, wet path down the curve of your neck, his touch a sinful mix of reverence and hunger as you unravel completely beneath him.
baekhyun’s body is pressed flush against yours, his every movement slow yet calculated, like he’s savoring each second, each inch, as if the world might steal you away from him again. the heat of his skin seeps into yours, the sheer intensity in his dark, lidded eyes making it impossible to look away. his breath is ragged, the sound mingling with the soft gasps spilling from your lips, the two of you lost in a rhythm that feels as natural as breathing.
“please,” he rasps, his voice cracking, raw with emotion. his forehead presses to yours, the touch grounding and desperate as he sinks deeper, his hips stuttering like the closeness of you is too much, too overwhelming to contain. “please, don’t fuckin’ leave me again.”
his words linger, heavy and aching, filling the space between you with the weight of every unspoken hurt, every moment lost. his fingers tighten on your hips, digging into your skin as though the feel of you beneath him is the only thing tethering him to reality. his thrusts grow erratic, uneven, each movement betraying the fragility of his control.
“nggghh—i think...” his voice falters, a low groan spilling from his lips as he buries his face into the curve of your neck. his mouth grazes your skin, reverent, desperate, the ghost of his breath hot and trembling against you. “i think i’ll die if you do. god, i can’t—i can’t spend another fuckin’ day without you.”
your heart clenches painfully, his vulnerability cutting straight through you like a blade. his body trembles against yours, every inch of him straining to keep you close, to pour everything he feels into the spaces between you. your fingers find their way into his hair, threading through the damp strands as you tug gently, coaxing him to meet your gaze.
his eyes lift, dark and glassy, brimming with emotion so unguarded it threatens to undo you. devotion, fear, yearning—they’re all there, laid bare and unfiltered.
“baekhyun,” you whisper, your voice a delicate tremor, barely audible over the shared gasps of breath between you. your hands cradle his face, fingertips brushing over the damp strands of his hair as if trying to ground him, to ground yourself, in this fragile, fleeting moment. “’m not going anywhere. i’m here... i’m yours. we’re yours.”
his breath catches, shuddering under the weight of your words, and a sound—fragile, broken—escapes him. he surges forward, pulling you closer, deeper, until it feels like he’s trying to fuse your souls together, to erase every inch of space between you. his thrusts are slower now, deliberate, every roll of his hips steeped in something more than desire—something raw and sacred, like a plea, a promise, an apology all at once.
your body arches into his, a guttural whine ripping from your throat as his cock pulses within your walls, stretching, filling, consuming. your muscles clench around him, your body dragging him deeper into your heat, and his control shatters like glass.
“f-fuckin’ shit,” he growls through gritted teeth, his hips jerking erratically as he spills into you, heat blooming deep inside, marking you in every sense of the word. the intensity steals the breath from your lungs, and as the waves of pleasure crash over you, pulling you under, your release spirals into his, the two of you breaking apart and piecing yourselves back together in the same breath.
his lips find yours, the kiss frantic and messy, a collision of tongues and teeth as if he’s trying to reclaim the time you spent apart. every ragged moan, every whispered curse and gasp fills the room, the air thick with the symphony of your shared need. the world outside fades, leaving only the two of you—entangled, desperate, and utterly consumed by the moment.
it’s not just lust, not just longing—it’s everything. years of heartache, love, and an aching, unrelenting need poured into every kiss, every thrust, every whispered vow that promises you’ll never leave each other again.
your walls clench around him again, coaxing more from him, and he groans deeply, his arms looping around your waist to anchor you to him. his grip is firm, almost desperate, holding your trembling hips in place as his thick, creamy release paints your insides. it’s obscene, the way it trickles down your shaking thighs, a messy, lewd reminder of everything he’s giving you. but baekhyun doesn’t stop—not yet. his hips slow, but only slightly, rolling into you with a lazy, unrelenting rhythm as if determined to fuck every drop back into you.
it’s filthy, yes, but there’s something almost tender in the way his lips brush against yours again, his deep moans muffled as his movements grow languid, sweet in their intensity. he nips at your bottom lip, his voice a teasing rasp when he finally pulls back just enough to speak, his forehead pressed to yours.
"how ’bout we give minji a sibling, huh?" the words spill from him, low and teasing, yet dripping with intent, his hips punctuating the question with a deliberate thrust that has you crying out.
your brain short-circuits, the world spinning as his cock drags against your sensitive walls. your head nods before you can even process his words, a frantic, needy motion as your body betrays just how utterly drunk you are on him. thinking straight? impossible. all you can manage is a breathless, choked moan of agreement, your fingers digging into his back as he continues to work you into oblivion."yeah?" your voice trembles, still riding the waves of your last high. "well, we’ve got all night to try."
the morning sun filtered softly through the trees as you stood at your front door, your body still humming with the afterglow of the night before. baekhyun’s car had just turned the corner, leaving behind the faint scent of his cologne and the weight of his goodbye kiss still lingering on your lips. you smiled to yourself, the memory of his warm hands on your waist and the way he’d looked at you all night filling you with a quiet joy.
but then your thoughts shifted, and a familiar ache settled in your chest. you glanced to your left, to chanyeol’s house, where your daughter, minji, was probably still fast asleep. you wondered when you should go pick her up, already missing the sound of her giggles and the way she always ran to you with open arms.
your gaze lingered on his house, warm affection for your daughter mingling with a twinge of guilt. chanyeol had been nothing but kind—stepping in to watch minji overnight so you and baekhyun could have this time together. but as your eyes traced the windows, movement caught your attention.
the curtain in the living room fluttered, a shadow shifting behind it before it was quickly pulled shut. the abruptness of the action made your heart sink. someone had been watching. you didn’t need to guess who.
your stomach twisted as the realization hit you. chanyeol.
the look on his face from last night flashed through your mind—the way his mouth had tightened, his expression faltering when you’d casually mentioned your plans with baekhyun. you’d tried to soften the blow, telling him you were "taking things slow," but now those words felt hollow, like a broken promise.
slow? the sight of you outside your front door in baekhyun’s shirt, kissing him goodbye, told a different story.
the weight of the moment pressed on you, guilt pooling heavy in your chest. chanyeol didn’t deserve this. he didn’t deserve to see this, to piece together the night you’d spent with baekhyun and feel whatever it was you knew he must be feeling.
for a second, you thought about knocking on his door, about saying something—anything—that might ease the tension now crackling in the air between your homes. but instead, you swallowed hard, forcing yourself to step inside your own door. maybe it was better this way, to let the moment settle, to deal with the aftermath later when your thoughts were clearer.
but as you shut the door behind you, your phone buzzed in your pocket.
chanyeol:
hey, can we talk?
a sigh escapes your lips, the guilt in your chest an ache that refuses to fade. you were already bracing for this conversation, knowing it had to happen, knowing you owed him this clarity. more than that, you still wanted him in your life—him and nari both. they had become such an integral part of your and minji's world, their presence a steady anchor in the chaos. you had to make sure he understood that.
your thumbs hover over the screen, the words forming before you can second-guess them.
yeah, i think we should, yeol.
chanyeol sits on the couch beside you, though the space between you feels like a canyon. it’s a noticeable difference from how he used to sit, closer, as if the world wasn’t big enough to separate the two of you.
he brought minji home a few minutes ago, fast asleep against his shoulder, her cheek pressed to him in the way only a child could manage, soft and unguarded. her little mouth hung open, a whisper of snores escaping as if the world around her didn’t exist. she’d been worn out from a full morning playing with his sister’s kids and nari, her tiny form so peaceful it made your heart ache. you’d both had quietly tucked her into bed together. and now here you were, back in the living room, perched on the edge of an unspoken conversation.
his sister had stopped by his place earlier this morning, her kids in tow for a chaotic playdate with nari and minji. she’d agreed to watch nari while chanyeol brought minji back home and you and him have this talk, though he’d been vague about why he needed the time. what was he supposed to say? “i’m going next door to talk to the girl i’ve been madly crushing on for over a year about seeing her kiss her ex-boyfriend and baby daddy and now i don’t know where i stand.” no. too messy. too raw. too much.
his jaw tightens, a small movement you barely catch out of the corner of your eye. the weight of his presence feels like it’s pressing against your chest, suffocating and grounding all at once. you glance at him, then quickly look away, unsure of how to start this conversation. unsure if you even can.
the silence between you stretches, awkward and heavy. you try to fill it with small talk, your voice soft. “how was minji last night?”
he glances at you, a smile tugging at his lips, though it doesn’t quite reach his eyes. there’s something pained in his expression, something restrained. “she was great. she always is.”
you smile faintly, but it fades as guilt bubbles in your chest. “look, chanyeol,” you start, your voice tentative, “i’m sorry for what you saw this morning. it probably didn’t make me look like ‘mother of the year.’” you pause, exhaling slowly. “i know i said baekhyun and i were going to take things slow, but… one thing led to another, and—”
“stop,” he interrupts, his voice sharp but not unkind. his hand comes up, almost reflexively, as if to shield himself from your words. he winces, and you know it’s because he’s picturing it—baekhyun’s hands on you, his lips on yours. where chanyeol wishes his own could be.
his shoulders slump as he exhales, the tension in his body evident. his face is a mosaic of emotions—hurt, frustration, resignation. “i don’t think i want to hear the details… about what happened with you and baekhyun.”
the air grows heavier, his words filling the space between you. for a moment, neither of you speaks. then, he sighs again, his voice quieter this time, softer. “i just came to say that i get it.”
you blink, caught off guard. “you do?”
he nods, his gaze falling to his hands, which rest loosely in his lap. “yeah,” he says, the word heavy with a weight he’s carried for longer than you probably realize. “i always knew your heart was still with him. filled with him. i thought that maybe, over time, with me… and nari… we—i—would fill it instead.” his voice cracks slightly, and he clears his throat, forcing himself to go on. “but then he came along. and even then, i was still foolish enough to believe i had a chance.”
your heart clenches, the rawness in his voice cutting deeper than any accusation ever could.
he looks up at you, his eyes earnest despite the ache swimming in them. “but i just want you to know… don’t feel guilty. about this. about me. nari and i—we’ll still be here for you and minji. always.”
his words hit you like a wave, and you’re left staring at him, your chest tight and your throat dry. there’s no anger in his voice, no bitterness, just an overwhelming sense of loss and quiet acceptance.
and somehow, that hurts even more.
you open your mouth, but no words come out. what can you possibly say to that? to a man who has just stripped himself bare, laying his feelings and heartbreak at your feet without a hint of resentment? guilt swirls in your stomach, heavy and unrelenting, but beneath it is something softer—gratitude.
“chanyeol,” you finally manage, your voice quiet, shaky. “i… i don’t even know where to start.” you tuck a strand of hair behind your ear, a nervous habit you’ve had for as long as you can remember. “i never meant to hurt you. i swear, i didn’t.”
his smile is small, sad, and fleeting. “i know.”
“you mean so much to me,” you continue, your voice gaining strength. “and not just because you’ve been so good to minji and me, but because you’re… you’re you. you’ve been a constant in our lives when everything else felt so uncertain.”
his gaze flickers to yours, and the weight of his emotions is almost too much to bear.
“but,” you add, hesitating because the truth feels like a betrayal, “i can’t lie to you. when baekhyun came back, it stirred up so much that i thought i’d buried. i thought i’d moved on, but… seeing him again…” you trail off, unsure how to finish without twisting the knife further.
“i get it,” he says softly, sparing you the need to say more.
“i don’t deserve you,” you whisper, shaking your head. “you’ve been nothing but kind and patient, and i hate that i’ve put you in this position. but… thank you. for everything. for understanding, for being here, for—”
“don’t,” he cuts you off gently, his voice firm but kind. “don’t thank me like this is the end of something. nari and minji are still best friends, and i’m not going anywhere. you don’t get rid of me that easily.”
his attempt at humor coaxes a faint smile from you, though the tears welling in your eyes threaten to spill over. “you’re too good, you know that?”
he shrugs, the corner of his mouth twitching upward in something that’s almost a smile. “or maybe i just have bad timing.”
you both fall silent again, the unspoken understanding settling between you like a fragile truce. you want to hug him, to thank him properly, but you know it’s not what he needs right now. instead, you place a hand on his, squeezing it gently.
“i’m sorry,” you say again, your voice barely above a whisper.
he squeezes back, his touch warm despite the distance he’s trying to keep. “me too.”
and with that, the moment shifts, leaving behind a bittersweet ache that doesn’t feel quite like an ending but more like an understanding—a quiet closure to what could have been. as chanyeol stands to leave, his hand moves instinctively, gently cupping your chin. his thumb grazes the soft curve of it, a gesture so intimately familiar it almost feels like a promise.
his eyes meet yours, but this time, there’s no playful glint, no trace of hope lingering there. instead, his gaze is calm, tinged with a bittersweet acceptance that sits heavy in the space between you. his lips pull into a small, wistful smile—warm enough to remind you of the connection you once shared but tempered by the reality that things have changed.
“we’ll be okay,” he says softly, the weight of his words lingering in the air. “nari and i… we’ll always be here for you and minji. that doesn’t change.”
his voice is steady, not heavy with regret but grounded in the knowledge that some paths aren’t meant to intertwine the way he might have once hoped. and as he steps back, the warmth of his touch fades, but not in a way that feels cold or distant.
instead, it feels like understanding.
he hesitates for a moment, the faintest flicker of something unreadable crossing his face, but then he nods slightly, his smile growing just enough to feel reassuring. “see you around, yeah?”
“yeah,” you manage, your voice soft but steady.
with that, he turns and walks out the door—not leaving behind a void, but rather a quiet sense of peace. the kind of peace that comes with knowing some connections will always remain, even if they’ve shifted into something new.
baekhyun had started staying over on weekends. it had been his idea initially, a way to make up for the years he missed with minji—but somewhere along the way, it became about more than that. your relationship with him had been blossoming, as if no time had been lost.
the nights you spent together felt like a rediscovery of who you both were, a bittersweet journey through what was and what could be. after minji would fall asleep, the two of you would sit on the couch, sharing stories from the years apart. his late-night shifts at the hospital during his program, your struggles navigating motherhood alone, the little triumphs and heartbreaks in between.
what surprised you most was how much had stayed the same. you still had the same taste in music, still argued playfully over which movie to watch. even the new interests you’d each picked up fit together seamlessly—baekhyun teasing you about your new baking obsession while you mocked his newfound love for photography.
it was during one of those weekends, after a long day spent at the park with minji, that things shifted. the house was quiet, save for the soft hum of the night outside. minji had gone to bed hours ago, worn out from a day of running around, and now you lay tangled in the sheets with baekhyun, your skin still warm from the closeness you’d just shared.
his arm draped lazily over your waist, fingers tracing absentminded patterns on your skin. “i’ve been thinking,” he murmured, his voice soft but serious.
you turned to face him, your cheek brushing against his bare chest. “about what?”
“about telling her,” he said, his hand stilling on your side. “minji. that i’m her dad.”
you blinked up at him, the words settling heavily in the air between you. it wasn’t the first time the thought had crossed your mind, but hearing him say it made it feel... real.
“you think she’s ready?” you asked, your voice barely above a whisper.
he nodded slowly, his dark eyes meeting yours. “she’s smart, you know? she already knows there’s something different about the way i am with her. and with you.” his lips quirked into a small smile. “plus, i want her to know. i want her to know how much i love her. how much i love... this.”
your breath hitched, his words wrapping around your heart like a warm embrace. “you really think now’s the time?”
baekhyun shifted, propping himself up on one elbow so he could look down at you. “i do. but only if you’re ready, too.”
you bit your lip, the weight of the decision pressing down on you. but as you thought about how minji had been bonding with baekhyun—her laughter during their tickle fights, the way she lit up every time he walked into the room—you realized he was right. she deserved to know.
“okay,” you whispered, your fingers reaching up to brush a stray lock of hair from his face. “let’s tell her.”
he leaned down, pressing a kiss to your forehead, his voice a gentle promise. “thank you. for letting me be here. for giving me this chance.”
the following day, during lunch, you sat minji down. the late afternoon sun poured into the kitchen, casting soft golden streaks across the table where you, baekhyun, and minji sat. the aroma of grilled cheese sandwiches and tomato soup lingered in the air, a comfort meal chosen carefully for this important day.
minji swung her little legs under the chair, humming a tune in between bites, blissfully unaware of the weight of the moment looming.
you glanced at baekhyun, his fingers tapping lightly against the edge of his bowl—a nervous tell he couldn’t quite hide. catching your eye, he gave you a small nod. it was time.
“minji,” you began gently, setting your spoon down and leaning forward. her big eyes flicked up to you, still chewing, her cheeks puffed out like a little chipmunk.
“mommy and i want to talk to you about something important,” baekhyun added, his voice warm but tinged with a nervous edge.
minji blinked, tilting her head curiously. “what is it?”
you took a deep breath, reaching for her tiny hand across the table. “you know how you’ve been spending a lot of time with baekhyun lately? going to the park, playing games, having fun?”
she nodded enthusiastically, a grin spreading across her face. “yeah! he’s so fun! and he’s really good at hide-and-seek!”
baekhyun chuckled softly, his fingers brushing through his hair. “well, there’s a reason we’ve been spending so much time together, minji,” he said, his voice tender. “it’s because i’m your dad.”
the room went quiet for a moment as her little brain worked to process the words. her eyes flicked between you and baekhyun, her brow furrowing slightly. “my... dad?”
you squeezed her hand gently. “yes, sweetheart. baekhyun is your dad. he loves you very much and wants to be in your life, just like mommy is.”
minji’s lips pressed together in a thoughtful pout. then, she looked at baekhyun, her small voice filled with curiosity. “are you gonna stay forever?”
his breath hitched, and you could see the emotion pooling in his eyes. he leaned forward, resting his elbows on the table to meet her at eye level. “yes, minji. i promise i’m not going anywhere. i want to be here for you, always.”
she studied him for a moment, then turned to you. “is that okay, mommy?”
your throat tightened at the question, the innocence of her trust nearly breaking you. you nodded quickly, brushing a hand through her soft hair. “of course, bun. it’s more than okay.”
a beat passed, and then her face lit up with a smile that could rival the sun. “so... does this mean i can call you daddy?”
baekhyun laughed, his voice shaky but filled with relief. “only if you want to, bunny.”
without hesitation, she slid off her chair and ran to him, wrapping her tiny arms around his waist. “hi, daddy.”
baekhyun’s arms enveloped her instantly, holding her like she was the most precious thing in the world. his eyes met yours over her head, glistening with unshed tears and a gratitude too deep for words.
in that moment, you knew everything would be okay. your little family had found its way back together.
˗ˏˋ ꒰ a/n ꒱ ˎˊ˗ omg k first of all, i’m so, so, sooooo sorry it took me forever to finish this fic 😭😭😭 i really wanted to try something new with this one. more angsty vibes, some slow-burn, and some juicy subplots to keep it interesting hehe :') instead of my usual "plot? what plot? oh wait, you mean porn" approach (which ofc the next like 4 fics are definitely giving that lmfao) ANYWAAAYYYY, i hope you enjoyed it!! <3 as always lmk ur thoughts <3 <3 (unless you hated it or thought it was mid...then pls...keep it to urself because i am a fragile lil bnuy n will cry 😭🤚🏼) k that's all bye love you guys!!!! ૮ ˶ᵔ ᵕ ᵔ˶ ა 💖
wc ☆ 1k summary ☆ sometimes your brain is too full for words or rationality, but thankfully, sehun has the perfect remedy for that. warnings ☆ older! sehun, art student! reader, there’s supposed to be an age gap but i feel like it isn’t obvious enough, comfort an ☆ this is a request from my old account !!! i loved it sm that i rlly wanted to bring it over here :) it also comforts me a lot so u all and the requester deserve to see it still
after nearly two hours of laying on the couch, there’s so much boredom flooding your veins that you end up hanging off the edge, the top of your head grazing the floor. with sehun out working all day, you were left home to your own devices. typically that wouldn’t have been an issue, but with the terrible white noise from the tv and the nonstop thoughts running through your head, it’s getting harder to tolerate being alive right now.
it’s just been a really big week for you. while it’s been good, receiving gallery invitations and much more, it’s starting to feel like you bit off more than you can chew. it gets harder and harder to balance all the things, like completing paintings, finding time for yourself and friends, doing the rest of your schooling, and then being a good girlfriend at the end of the day.
you love it, and love being ambitious with the need to do everything you love, but there’s moments like these where you stare at the wall and realize you can’t handle it that make you feel terrible. that exact feeling is what put you right here, getting home from your last class of the day, one that ended when the sun was up, and going straight to sitting in the same position on the couch for the rest of the night.
the silence is starting to pull a headache to the front of your skull when the front door opens, sehun pushing through with a sigh. it’s so dark that the only thing he can see is your face, lit up by the tv. he frowns, and you can’t really see it all too well, but you know it’s there in the way he hasn’t said anything.
he flicks the table lamp on as he comes closer, calling your name softly, “why’s it so dark in here? are you okay?”
you look at him briefly, just for a second before the thought of talking at all brings a burn behind your eyes. all you can do is shake your head and roll your eyes before you can stop yourself. your head falls in your pillow before you can see sehun’s reaction, but you can tell that he’s even more put off by you than he already was.
he sits next to you, by your feet, in silence. you see his hand reach out to touch you, before pulling away. his mouth opens, like he’s going to speak, before it closes again. he then makes a movement to grab one of your feet, turning to face you better while pressing his thumbs into the sole. the fact that he still chooses to be so tender despite your soft launching a terrible attitude forms a lump in your throat and a sting in your eyes.
sehun frowns once again, as if the one he had couldn’t grow any deeper, before finally speaking up again. “sweetheart..” he takes a sharp breath in, finding his words, “i see that you’ve had a bad day. and i’m sorry. i want to help you, but when you give me this negativity i can’t, right?”
you sniffle, a little shudder moving through your body, before collecting yourself and sitting up. your knees get hugged to your chest, chin resting on top. “i know, but i just..” you don’t even know. the feelings are still so fresh that it makes you even angrier trying to compute it. “i’m just so fucking tired, okay? and i can’t.. i.. i don’t-“
sehun shushes you and closes the gap before your emotions can take you any further. his arms wrap tight around your torso and pull you into his chest, grounding you and pulling you away from your frustrations. he holds you there, tightly while you fall apart again, quick breaths and hot tears falling onto the fabric of his button up. i know. he mumbles, kissing your hair. i know.
just like that your entire body in his grasp, and he’s up on his feet. your head is still buried in his chest, tears still falling freely, but it happens silently as he leads you to the bathroom and sits you on the toilet. he grabs a bit of tissue, calmly wiping your tears and your nose, and exiting with a kiss to your forehead.
when he comes back, his hands are dangerously full, almost dropping two candles and a bag of bath salts. he starts with the water, fiddling with the temperature like one degree matters, which it does when it’s for you. then the candles are lit and salts are thrown in the water, and all you can do is watch with your damp cheeks and stuffy nose because how is he so perfect? how does he always know what to do?
once everything is set up, he kneels in front of you, hands on your knees. face is completely calm, straight as can be, while managing the look of patience that only comes out after leaving the office.
he takes in a breath, “i know your day hasn’t been good. your back hurts. your feet hurt. your brain hurts. now, all i need is for you to let me help you. should i stay with you or do you want some time to yourself?”
you’re too drained to even try talking so you just grab his wrist, he asks again, and you nod. that’s all it takes for him to slowly remove your clothes for you, helping you into the bath before getting seated next to you. he’s still in his slacks, you realize, tie now undone and button up halfway unbuttoned, and he brushes it off, knowing what you were thinking already. he’s studied you so well that he might as well put mind reading in his resume.
the same way he knows your thoughts before they even form, he rolls his sleeves to his elbows and puts his hands under the water to work through the tension in your muscles. his eyes never wander, nor do his fingers, gaze locked on your face to make sure your mind is on nothing but him and the moment you’re in now. of course he’s made the mental note to talk to you about everything, but that can be pushed to later. your needs are different right now, and he’ll work his hardest to meet them.
genre: baek!inuyasha, y/n as kagome, fluff fluff fluff!!! and a hbd again baekhyunnieee <3
2.4k words
“can you please slow down??” you’re struggling to keep up with baekhyun’s fast pace. he only spares you a glare and slight huff before approaching you begrudgingly. you gulp, but stand your ground. he doesn’t scare you!
you yelp when he snatches your backpack and wears it himself.
“why do you always bring so much? no wonder you’re so slow.” he scoffs, turning back to continue trudging towards the forest.
“because you eat four noodles for a meal, baek!” your slow human legs play catch up, moving double his regular speed. stupid baekhyun, never considerate to the fact that you aren’t part demon like he is.
“ow!” you slam into his back. “what’s your problem, seriously?” you grunt, slapping his back, annoyed by his lack of spatial awareness. you’d think a half-demon dog who can hop off trees would know not to stop abruptly in front of someone.
“whatcha bring?” he stops and starts rummaging through your backpack, forgetting that you are literally on the way to find shards of the shikon jewel.
his ears perk up.
“jajangmyeon!!! cook this for me.” he shoves the packs of ramen into your chest and starts taking out all the kitchen supplies you managed to fit in your bag. you release a very loud sigh, but baekhyun does not give a single fuck, ignoring you as he sets everything up for you.
“why are you just standing there? cook it, lady.”
oh. OH.
your body slowly burns up in anger. you feel your face turn red first then your ears. you’re huffing and puffing. you have never met someone as insufferable and cocky as he is. lady?! you have a name!!!
your eye twitches one last time before the rage takes over your body.
“sit boy!! sit boy!! sit boy!!” you exclaim, hands balled up in fists on your sides.
baekhyun screams as his face plops to the ground three painful times.
“ahhh!! i’m sorry, i’m sorry!!” he shouts out of desperation for you to stop, as he lies face burried in the grass.
“you don’t know how to say please! you think i’m here to babysit you, huh?!” you scold him, slapping the back of his head this time. “the fuck is wrong with you? they dont teach manners in the sengoku era?!”
“i said i’m sorry!!” he looks up at you with the most pathetic pout he could garner. your eyes reach his and you frown when your heart stutters at the sight of him being genuinely apologetic. “y/n, i’m sorry. can you please cook this for me? i’m starved.”
the more you look at him, the more you see the human in him being true and remorseful.
you sigh, “you’re so tiring.”
you grab the gas burner and pot from him, still annoyed, and start preparing the ramen quietly. baekhyun sits across from you stealthily, careful not to piss you off any more than he has. you pour a bottle into the pot and wait for the water to boil. you don’t look in his direction. you can feel his gaze on you.
he’s being quiet but the way he’s staring at you is so loud. he doesn’t want you to be upset with him. “um,” he attempts to speak but backs out when you don’t even flinch at his voice.
he bites his lip and frowns.
“y/n?” he calls out your name to get your attention.
“hm?” you hum, refusing to look up. you’re not done being upset with him and you knew the moment you set eyes on his pouty puppy face, it would be over for you.
“are you really tired of me?”
oh, nevermind, it’s still over for you.
you look up and baekhyun’s trying to suppress his pout, his lips scrunching up at the side of his mouth. his ears lightly shift down and he’s looking at you with eyes so dark and glossy that you can’t help but surrender.
you bite the side of your cheek and start putting the ramen in the boiling pot.
“no,” you say, trying to balance all the noodles so they wouldn’t overflow. “but i’m really fucking close.”
baekhyun perks up and grabs all the seasoning packets, ripping them open for you. at least you weren’t tired of him, he thinks.
you scoff, taking the packets and adding them to the pot when the water was evaporated and no longer in sight. you give it one last mix before baekhyun is all over it, grabbing a bunch of noodles with the chopsticks and shoving it whole in his mouth.
“at least chew...” you mumble, brows furrowed in disgust as you watch him guzzle the entire steaming pot.
he burps in your face.
“thank you, y/n!” he smiles with his eyes as if he didn’t just blow the entire meal in your face. “did you bring more?”
your eye twitches and baekhyun notices it immediately, eyes widening and lips pursing, knowing he just fucked up again.
“i’m going home. good luck finding the shards.” you get up, leaving the mess on the floor for baekhyun to clean up. you start walking in the opposite direction, instead heading back to the well.
“waaaaait! you just got here! you can’t go home yet.” baekhyun runs and jumps in front of you, blocking you from leaving.
“i don’t like getting burped on, baek.” you walk around him, your nose is up in the air, refusing to look at him once again. if he was going to continue to be rude, you’ll just go home. you’re sure your family misses you. you’ll return after a week. that should show him.
“i’m sorryyyyy! i couldn’t help it!” even though he’s a lot faster than you, he’s moving as if you had the advantage. and maybe that means he actually is sorry.
no. you stop yourself from feeling bad. he’s been rude all day. he doesn’t deserve your help.
“oh.” he says as he notices you’re not backing down. he decides to quietly walk by your side, thinking up a plan to get you to stay with him a little longer. he lets you go ahead smugly once he comes up with an idea.
this would be a lot faster if baekhyun hadn’t broken your bike the other day. your bike was the only thing that got you to keep up with him. saving the world was a bit hard when you only had your two human feet.
baekhyun rushes in front of you and kneels down with his back facing towards you.
“what?”
“get on.” he says curtly.
“no.” you move to the right. he moves even quicker.
“just get on. i can see you’re getting tired.”
you purse your lips. your feet were getting a bit swollen from walking such a long distance. before you could think any further, your body leans into his back and you let him carry you. you’ve never been on his back before. it’s warm.
you didn’t know what you expected to feel like, but it wasn’t this.
it wasn’t supposed to feel cozy. you thought you would be overwhelmed by his scent, but it’s actually quite pleasant and comforting. you can’t quite place it. it just smells like him. and you don’t hate it. not at all. it’s as if you can’t get enough of it, burying your face in his hair.
once he feels you’re secure on his back, baekhyun speeds through the field, no longer having to wait for you. the breeze was soft against your skin. it felt nice, soothing. slowly, you feel yourself fighting the urge to drift off into a nap. it won’t hurt to get a bit of shut eye.
----
you were wrong to assume baekhyun wouldn’t do anything to piss you off while you were asleep.
you awake to the sight of a mountain – far, far, away from the well.
“sit boy!” you scream into his ear. baekhyun falls to the ground with a screech, not expecting you to wake up this early. he was so close. you get off his back and cross your arms in front of him. he tries to get up. “sit-”
“stopstopstop!!” baekhyun begs, waving his hands in the air. “i smelled a demon and- and- it's not that bad if we get rid of it before you go, hm?”
you frown.
“one demon? please?”
you roll your eyes and groan exceptionally loud.
“you really are getting on my last nerves. one demon! one!” you point a finger at him, emphasizing the one. you really do need a break from him. it’s not normal for you to want to put him in a chokehold this early on.
baekhyun perks up, jumping up in delight. “this way! i can smell the demon stink.”
he grabs you and puts you on his back, holding you tightly as he jumps his way up the mountain. you’re met with a small and quaint house. it seems peaceful. you’ve learned in your first week here that the peaceful and silent sounds of nature should not be fooled for safety.
baekhyun lets you down and approaches the house. you follow right behind him, grabbing your bow and quiver. your heart’s racing at how quiet it is. when you both enter the house, the door shuts with full force.
that can’t be a good sign.
you grab an arrow from your quiver, preparing for whatever the demon has in store for you both. baekhyun has one hand on his word, ready to wield it. it’s dark but you can vaguely see the creaky boards and the cobwebs in the corners of the room. it’s creepy – eerie how quiet it is. you try to take a step forward but baekhyun puts a hand out in front of you.
“i smell it.”
a loud hiss rings behind you and baekhyun shouts your name to watch out. you don’t have the reflexes to turn around fast enough before the demon lunges towards you and shoves you through the floorboards.
“baekhyun!!” you shout, trapped by a large spider demon. you try to grab an arrow from behind so you could attempt to stab it but it hisses and sprays a web to your wrist.
“where is it??” the spider speaks and you’re met with an overwhelming stench of decay.
“i dont know what youre talking about.” you reach for your nose but he traps it with a web too. fuck, he’s so stinky. “baekhyun!!! get your ass here now!!”
“the shikon jewel, girl. i can sense it.” his eight eyes scan your body for the jewel, only to be disappointed. he grunts and leaves you tied to the dusty basement floor. you were really regretting taking a nap on baekhyun’s back.
you hear a bunch of noises above you and some debris falls onto you. you have to shut your eyes from how much dust was getting in them. forcefully trying to remove yourself from the web, you pull a muscle. “ow, fuck.” guess you’ll just die then. baekhyun’s clearly abandoned you here.
thump
speak of the devil.
baekhyun stands over you, out of breath and hair flat on his face, covered in sweat. he’s looking at you with a new expression you don’t quite recognize.
it’s weird. you shake your head and remember what predicament you’re currently in.
“where have you been? i’ve been calling you.” immediate scolding.
he rushes to your side and cuts through the webs with tessaiga, setting you free.
“he was really big...” he mutters, embarrassed of how long it took him to fight the spider. “i- i thought he-”
finally free, you rub your wrists and arm. you’re going to have to wrap it up with medicinal herbs later. the pulled muscle was hurting a lot more than you thought it would. baekhyun is uncharacteristically quiet. he’s staring at you a lot longer than you’re used to, making you a bit uncomfortable.
“you thought he?” you help him finish his thought. but baekhyun doesn’t reply. “hello? earth to baekhyun-”
baekhyun’s arm pulls you in for a hug so tight you’re not sure where to put your hands. you settle for his back. he squeezes you tighter. you bury your face in his robe and hug him back. it was rare for baekhyun to show affection like this. it was refreshing to see his human side.
you’re the first to pull away. you weren’t ready to see his face.
your heart aches at the sight of his tear-stained cheeks. not thinking, you reach for his cheeks and wipe them with your thumbs. you give him a reassuring smile.
“i’m okay.” you tell him, but he refuses to look at you, opting to stare at your feet instead. wanting him to see that you are fine, you nudge him delicately with a finger under his chin. “i’m fine, baekhyun. my wrists hurt and i think i pulled something but really, i’m fine.”
it doesn’t dawn on you how close you two have become. baekhyun’s eyes scan your face, staring at your eyes first, then your nose, your cheeks, and finally your lips. you notice his head leaning in closer to you and your breath stops.
is he going to kiss you?
he tucks strand of your hair behind your ear and strokes your ear with his thumb. you feel yourself redden at the action. and without a second thought.
SLAM
“ow!! what the hell was that for?!” baekhyun flies across the room with a huge frown on his face, shocked by your strength.
“i’m sorry!! i’ve never kissed anyone before!” you cover your face in embarrassment.
“that’s not how you do it, idiot!!” he yells under the broken floorboards pile at the end of the room. you run to help him, pushing the rotten wood off him. baekhyun is shooting glares at you, deeply offended that you would push him off instead of kiss him.
which could not be any true.
you give him a peck on his cheek when he stands up and dusts off the debris off his robe.
“i was scared.” you bite your lip nervously.
“whatever.” baekhyun scoffs, brushing you off.
you don’t miss the grin on his face when he thinks you’re not looking.
he bends his knees.
“come on, let’s get you home.”
you wrap your arms around him, hands resting on his chest, and get on his back.
“actually, is it okay if i stay a bit longer?”
baekhyun simply shrugs. he doesn’t know you can feel his heart racing. you snuggle into his long silver hair, his scent comforting you once more before your eyes shut from the exhaustion.
chananyeol bong: ahhhhh!!! i wrote this for me hahahaha i've been watching inuyasha in the mornings. i havent watched it since i was a kid so its like im watching it for the first time!! and in japanese! and for some reason, i couldnt help but picture baekhyun as inuyasha bc hes sucha cute puppy like inuyasha 😊💓💘❤️🔥 so if you made it this far, tysm for reading!! love yall and ill see you in the next fic!! mwaaaaaaaaah!! 😙💋💗🏹🐕
genre: brother’s best friend!au, chanyeol x reader, its getting messyyyy, junmyeon gets whiplash, y/n is very toxic in this one (lowkey wanna 🤚🏼💥 her), but i made sure to start us off soft <3
4.3k words
missed part one?
“Do you have to go?” You’re straddling his hips and massaging his bare chest. Chanyeol rubs the side of your hips, trying his best to comfort you before he has to start packing for the business trip.
“Come with me if you’re so worried.” He tries his best to reassure you but he knows its falling on deaf ears. Despite his best efforts to ease your mind, you always found something to be paranoid about.
It was tiring, but it was you.
"You know I can’t. Junmyeon is going to be there.” You pout before leaning down to lay your head on his chest. His heart beats warmly against your ear. You sigh, shutting your eyes to listen to the drumming of your lover’s heart.
“Let’s just tell him.” You feel his heart beat a little faster.
Unconvinced by your own hearing, you glance up to see him already looking down at you. His eyes analyze your facial expression, trying to gauge how you feel.
“What do you think?” His face shows anticipation, hoping you’ll say yes. In the past, he was always the one to shut it down, the one who wanted to keep it a secret from Junmyeon.
Your own heart beats faster but it doesn’t beat out of excitement.
You swallow the bubble in your throat, unsure of your answer.
“Why?” You ask apprehensively. You honestly didn't think you would be scared to tell Junmyeon. He has never cared about who you’ve dated in the past. Truth be told, he always made the effort to get along with your past boyfriends. Even Jongin, despite the numerous amounts of times he’s broken your heart.
Although you’ve said multiple times that you didn’t care what Junmyeon thought, the way your heart is racing is telling you that you were absolutely terrified of what your older brother will say when he finds out.
“I think he would be happy for us.” Chanyeol squeezes your arm, trying to ease the tension forming in your shoulders. Ever since that night he slept over, he hasn’t been able to get Junmyeon’s voice out of his head: If it’s any consolation to you, I think it’s because she has a crush on you. He’s been daydreaming from that day on, wondering how life would be if you two weren’t chickens and just told Junmyeon the truth.
He pictured all of you sitting on the couch, watching whatever romcom you forced them to watch. It would be nice, he thought.
“I don’t know...” You’re quick to burst his bubble. It’s obvious you’re anxious about it. You don’t even know why you’re so anxious. It’s Junmyeon.
Junmyeon is probably the perfect brother to handle a sister like you. You weren’t exactly easy to raise. Your dad never made the effort to parent you properly since your mother died. It’s not that he didn’t want to. He didn’t have the time to. He had to pay the bills, pay groceries, pay for you and Junmyeon’s tuition. He really did his best.
He just had to give up on other things... Like being a father.
Junmyeon was the kind of brother that never played rough with you as a kid. He was always gentle, never once trying to bodyslam you to “practice his wrestling moves”. He let you dress him up for impromptu fashion shows. He offered a shoulder to cry on for every single time Jongin broke your heart and a warm smile for every single time you took him back.
He supported you when you didn’t have a parent to lean on, congratulating you when you got a C+ for once. He scolded you like a mother would when you were caught sneaking back into the house at 2 in the morning because Jongin was stupid enough to rev his engine. He comforted you when you caught Jongin cheating on you then yelled at you when you took him back in a heartbeat. He took you in when your dad didn’t want you in his house anymore, telling Junmyeon that “you better get your act right and graduate college or he’s cutting you off for good”.
All you had was Junmyeon. And to disappoint him for dating his best friend, that was a conversation you were not willing to have yet.
“It’s okay. We don’t have to. I just thought we could start thinking about it.” Chanyeol kisses the top of your head, rubbing your arm softly. It would be a lie to say he wasn’t disappointed by your answer or lack thereof. But if you weren’t ready, he wouldn’t push you.
There’s a brief silence.
You don’t want to say anything, afraid if you do, he’ll remember that he has to leave soon. Instead, you pepper his chest with kisses, initiating another round. Chanyeol chuckles, watching you slowly lower yourself back to his lower half with that playful grin of yours.
“I have to start packing soon.” He says, running his fingers through your hair, not necessarily stopping you.
“You can’t spare your girlfriend another 15?” You look up at him with doe eyes, lashes fluttering exaggeratedly and earning you another laugh from Chanyeol. Your lips press against his inner thigh, waiting for his permission.
“How could I say no to this face?” He grabs your chin between his fingers and shakes your head gently, nose scrunching up at how cute you look between his legs. You grin widely before dragging your tongue from the base to his tip. He takes a deep breath, throwing his head against the pillow to relax and letting you take care of him.
Wanting his full attention back on you, you did what any normal girlfriend would do. You swing a leg over his torso so your ass was in Chanyeol’s full view. You hear Chanyeol hum behind you before he’s grabbing your cheeks and squeezing them in his grasp.
“Wish I could frame this.” Chanyeol remarks before he buries his face between your cheeks.
You give him a playful shake before going down on him and taking his full length into your mouth. You feel him smile against your cunt before he fully dives into you, lapping his tongue against your folds and eating you up like it’s his breakfast. You moan as you try to focus on his member, bobbing your head up and down and slobbering all over his dick. You almost lose balance when Chanyeol inserts two of fingers inside of you, fucking you so close to your climax already.
You do your best to keep the rhythm you’ve set for yourself. Your hand finds the base of his cock and starts stroking it as you suck him off. Chanyeol’s rhythm doesn’t falter however, he even goes and starts thrusting his hips into you. His grip around your cheeks tightens as he fucks your mouth and your cunt simultaneously. He picks up his pace, knowing how close you’re getting.
Your hands grip onto his thighs instead as he curves his finger to hit your gspot repeatedly. You feel your juices release into his mouth as he continues to suck you dry. Your mouth doesn’t leave his cock, letting him fuck you until he cums at the back of your throat and makes you swallow him in an instant.
You leave his mouth with a pop, making sure to get the very last drop, and collapse onto his body. Chanyeol chuckles before checking the time.
“Baby, we have 10 more minutes.”
He gives you 2 minutes before you get on his dick and ride him until those 10 minutes are up.
--------
You tried not to let it bother you. You really did.
But the moment Junmyeon mentioned a woman’s name, your mind would not, for the life of you, settle down. You paced around your room as your brother continued to yap about the conference he’ll be attending and something about a continental breakfast.
All you could think of was Chanyeol. He made you promise that you wouldn’t freak out while he was gone. This was his first business trip away from you. Of course you’re going to worry.
“Are you guys staying in the same room?” You cut Junmyeon off suddenly, unable to listen if you didn’t ask.
“Who? Me and Chanyeol? No, the company gave us our own rooms.”
Fuck. That didn’t help you at all.
If they were sharing a room, that would put you to ease knowing Junmyeon could keep an eye on him in the night. You knew you were being irrational but Chanyeol was just too friendly. You couldn’t even stand the idea of a woman touching him just to squeeze past.
“Ahh okay.” You say, a bit disappointed.
“Anyways, Hyemi -” Bitch, you mutter to yourself. “thought it would be a good idea to do an escape room after we finish up at the conference. Sort of like a teambuilding activity. Isn’t that fun? We love escape rooms.”
“So fun!” You fake your excitement. Chanyeol also loves escape rooms. You wonder if he’s excited to go play with Hyemi.
"Okay, well, I’ll let you go.” Junmyeon finally ends your 20 something minute phone call. “Behave. Don’t throw any parties while I’m gone. Study well. Love you.”
“Love you too. Bye!” You hang up before he gets the chance to realize that you didn’t say yes to no parties.
You immediately swipe to your messages and find your boyfriend’s contact.
you:
dont have too much fun with hyemi at the escape room
hubby 💍💗✨:
lol i promise i wont have too much fun, my love
hyemi is just a coworker
dont overthink too much while im gone, ok?
love you
you:
love you too 💗
His texts are enough to ease your mind.
----------------
Nope.
His texts were not enough to ease your mind. You thank God Junmyeon is there. He doesn’t even know how grateful you are that he’s there.
Your unaware big brother had sent you a video of the conference, wanting you to see all the various booths and how big the size of the event was. What he didn’t realize was that you’d be hyperfixated on Chanyeol and who you’re assuming to be Hyemi laughing together, heads nearly butting each other.
Oh, how your blood was boiling when you saw him lean down to hear her. You hate how kind he had to be with everyone. It drove you crazy. Why couldn’t he be kinder without breathing the same air as her? You screen recorded the part with Chanyeol and Hyemi and sent it to him immediately.
you:
[video sent]
chanyeol
wtf
He doesn’t answer.
Fuck.
You were fuming. You were feeling yourself go insane with every second passing that he didn’t reply. You couldn’t think properly. You needed to hear that she was just a coworker one more time.
And that’s why your next move was idiotic, stupid, and absolutely dumb.
you:
junny
what’s chanyeol doing?
He calls you immediately. That’s when your overthinking bubble bursts. And you realize what a fucking idiot you are.
“Hey, Chanyeol’s walking around the conference. What’s wrong?” Junmyeon sounds concerned more than he is suspicious, but you would be lying to yourself if you thought he didn’t suspect something was going on. He was the smarter sibling after all.
You didn’t know how to respond. You were normally good at lying but that text was just utterly stupid. How could you even explain it?
“I asked him to get me this limited edition blind box but it didn’t look like he remembered in your video.” That sounds believable, right?
“Ahh, yes, I think he’s finding it right now. It’s the Twinkle Twinkle, right?” Okay. He sounds convinced. You did mention that you were interested in it a while back. They worked in the toy industry so this checks out. You try to calm yourself. “I’ll ask him when he gets back. But I could’ve bought it for you.”
“Yeah, but he owes me for pissing me off last week.” You lie easily, your heart now settling knowing that he might actually be looking for that toy for you.
“Alright, I gotta go.” Junmyeon says as a customer interrupts the phone call. “Oh, Y/N! Please, no parties! Please say it!”
You hang up before he can make you agree.
Your phone finally pings and your heart jumps when it sees Chanyeol in your notifications. It sinks when it remembers why he’s texting you. You take a deep breath before opening his messages. Fuck, you should have never sent it.
hubby 💍💗✨:
baby, we were just talking
pls dont be like this for the whole trip
you:
like what?
hubby 💍💗✨:
being jealous
watching my every move
it’s a lot. im working. i cant be reassuring you every 10 seconds.
you:
ok
have a good weekend.
You suck in your cheek to stop yourself from crying in frustration. Why were you like this? Chanyeol was such a nice guy and you were just letting your past insecurities take over you so easily.
You put your phone on do not disturb until the morning and hit up your girls group chat. Maybe it’s for the best that you leave him alone for now. That’s what normal girlfriends do, you convince yourself.
you:
junny’s out for the weekend.
party at my house tonight 😛
minji 🫧:
yessssss!!! ill be there
seulgi 🧸:
fucking finally!!! ill bring the tequila 🇲🇽
jane🌪️:
ill spread the word
ty for hosting bb <3
--------
Chanyeol can’t settle down. He must’ve called you a hundred times by now. He knew how you got. He knew you’d been hurt before. Fuck, maybe he should’ve said it nicer. He should’ve put a heart emoji or something.
He’s pacing in the lobby of the escape room, refreshing his messages and checking your instagram for any updates. He runs his hand through his hair when there is nothing from you.
“Hey, you okay?” Junmyeon approaches a very stressed Chanyeol. “You’ve been on your phone a lot. Is everything okay at home?”
Chanyeol looks up at his best friend and exhales. His eyes are a bit red from trying to stop himself from crying. Junmyeon is shocked. He’s never seen him like this.
“I- Um,” Chanyeol can’t even form a sentence from how stressed he is. Instead, he takes a quick glance at instagram. Junmyeon watches as his eyes light up. He peeks over to see the story he’s just clicked on.
It was a video of a house party. A house that looked awfully like his house. Junmyeon moves his body so it’s obvious he’s now watching the same video. Chanyeol doesn’t even care at this point. He’s too stressed to think about hiding it from him.
Chanyeol’s heart sinks when he sees Jongin pouring a tequila bottle into your mouth. “Fuck.” He swears, immediately shoving the phone in his pocket.
“Chanyeol,” Junmyeon says carefully, in disbelief of what’s going on. He initially thought they were dating based on how nervous Chanyeol was, but you looked very much single in that video. He’ll yell at you later for throwing the party he explicitly told you not to throw. But for now, his friend was clearly in distress because of you.
“What’s going on?” Junmyeon doesn’t want to assume but has a pretty good hunch of what is going on. He just needed to hear it from Chanyeol himself.
“What did it look like?” Chanyeol spits out, clearly upset. And reasonably so, if Junmyeon was right about the hunch. “Your sister was getting shots poured down her throat by her ex.”
“Why are you so upset?”
“Because” Chanyeol finally gains a conscious and hesitates to tell him. But fuck, if this is how you were going to act every single time he interacted with a woman, even after a year of dating, he wasn’t sure how much more his heart could handle. “Because she’s my girlfriend, Junmyeon. I’m sorry. She wasn’t ready to tell you yet but,” He pauses. “Fuck, I don’t even know how to fix this.”
Junmyeon pauses to think. He tries to keep his composure.
“Why? What’d you do?” Junmyeon isn’t accusing him of anything. He’s just a bit lost and shocked with all this brand new information.
“I don’t know!” He groans in response. “Smiled at Hyemi?”
As if being summoned, a very bubble Hyemi approaches Chanyeol and hooks her arm through his. “Escape room time!” Her eyes crinkle before dragging him to the room.
Junmyeon follows with a big frown on his face.
You threw a party. You’re dating his best friend. And right now, Chanyeol was letting a woman cling to his arm.
He has no idea what to think.
--------
You wake up to the blasting noise of your ringtone. Your eyes are still closed, finding it hard to open in fear of the pending migraine.
“Hello?” Your voice tries its best to escape your throat but it comes out raspy and in need of water.
"I can’t believe you.” Junmyeon’s disappointed tone is enough to jolt you out of your bed. He doesn’t greet you good morning. No how are you. Just pure disappointment. “I specifically asked you not to throw a party. And you can’t even give me the respect to do that.”
“Junny, I’m so sorry!” You immediately apologize. He wasn’t supposed to know. You don’t even know how he found out. You can’t have possibly forgot to remove him from your stories.
You put Junmyeon on speaker as he continues to yell at you while you scroll on instagram and then you see it, Seulgi’s story has a video of Jongin pouring a shot directly from the bottle.
Chanyeol follows Seulgi.
Your heart drops.
“Junny, I have to call Chanyeol.” His silence is enough to tell you that Chanyeol did in fact reveal your relationship with him.
“Fine. But you’re grounded. I don’t care how old you are.” Junmyeon says, making you roll your eyes. His groundings were the worst. He was a lot stricter than your dad was when you lived with him. Matter of fact, your dad had no clue how to ground you. Junmyeon, on the other hand, was like a hawk. He knew all your tricks (you might have learned the tricks by watching him).
“Bye.” He says curtly.
You slide your phone down to look at your notifications. And you didn’t know it was possible to feel worse, but you do.
hubby 💍💗✨:
im sorry. i should have said it in a nicer way.
pls dont be mad
baby?
pls answer my calls
pls dont do this. i promise hyemi is just a coworker
baby i said im sorry. pls answer
we’re going to the escape room soon
pls answer ok? ❤️
Your heart stops, reading all of his messages. You immediately call Chanyeol. It doesn’t even ring once.
“Hello?” The feeling in your chest feels a bit lighter hearing his voice. At least he answered.
“Hi baby, I’m sorry I didn’t answer. I was giving you space.” You apologize instantly. You didn’t know he felt bad. If you had known, you would have never put your phone on dnd.
There’s a pause. A long pause that makes your stomach twist. Then he exhales.
“Giving me space? Do you think I’m an idiot?” His voice is sharp and accusatory. This can’t be happening.
“I saw you and Jongin. Do you still want to stick with that story?” Oh god, it’s happening.
“No!” You exclaim, tears prickling in the corners of your eye. “I don’t think you’re an idiot. I put you on dnd and I-I didn’t think you were upset. And I have no idea why Jongin was there!” You pace around your bedroom nervously. You knew it was a bad idea for Jane to take care of inviting people. She was always an instigator like that.
“I said it was okay! I told you to have a good weekend! Baby, I’m sorry!” You were trying your best to stop the tears from falling.
“Baby, I saw you.” His voice softens because he hates being mean to you, but you really hurt him this time. “That didn’t feel like you were giving me space. That felt like you were punishing me.”
“I didn’t mean to. Please believe me.” You sniffle, the tears becoming inevitable.
Chanyeol’s heart aches when he hears it. He hates this. He hates hurting you.
But he’s so tired.
“I believe that you think that but baby, we both know you were really upset.” He pauses like the next thing he’s about to say will break you. “I... I think we need to have a talk when I get back, okay?”
“A talk?” Your heart sinks. “No, we can fix this right now. I’m not mad about the Hyemi thing anymore. Please.”
You say anything, really, anything to get him to talk to you now. To just forgive you now. Like he always does.
“I can’t keep doing this. I’ll call you when I get back.” He says sternly but you know this isn’t easy for him. You know he’s fighting himself to be rigid with you. It’s easier for him to be this way on the phone.
“Okay.” Your voice feels small and quiet, feeling trapped by the impending conversation. “I love you.”
There’s a silence. A really painfully long silence.
He hangs up and your life suddenly feels like it’s falling apart.
--------
Junmyeon comes home with the intention of yelling at you, rehearsing his speech about disrespect and responsibility over and over again on the plane. That plan is quickly shut down when he sees how clean and quiet the apartment is. There is not a single red cup in site. You don’t clean this aggressively. He drops his bags at the entrance and removes his shoes skeptically, a bit freaked out.
He approaches your room and knocks.
He frowns when you don’t answer. It’s not like you to not greet him at the door. Even when he’s upset with you, you’re always at the door. When he hears a sniffle, Junmyeon’s heart aches and rushes inside.
There you were. Wrapped in a blanket, cuddling your body pillow, tissues all over the floor.
He’s quick to get on the bed and hug you from behind. You immediately turn around and cry in your big brother’s chest. “It’s okay. You’ll be okay.” He rubs your back comfortingly. He’s taken back to the time he was holding his 7-year old sister and you had hit your own ankle with his scooter.
“He doesn’t want me anymore.” You muttered in his chest.
Your voice is unstable and tiny. It aches his heart. Junmyeon has completely forgotten about the party. All he can think about is you and your little heart that feels things immensely and so loudly. He stays by your side. He doesn’t leave you alone and holds you in his arms until you finally fall asleep.
You look so small in his embrace. He sighs. Chanyeol had told him everything. And although he saw how exhausted and tired Chanyeol was and even understands his best friend’s decision, it hurts to see his sister suffer like this.
He wishes he could do something, anything, to help alleviate the pain in your heart.
--------
The day comes a lot sooner than you hoped. Chanyeol had called you saying he was parked outside your building. You didn’t have time to get ready, having spent the whole morning rotting in bed. You simply washed your face and combed your hair. You grabbed the closest hoodie you could find and went out the door to meet him, absolutely dreading the talk.
He was on his phone in his car. He looked so... relaxed compared to you. He had a black baseball cap on and his own oversized hoodie. Did he have to look so good? You opened the door and you were met by the overwhelming smell of him. He turns to look at you and smiles. Your heart feels like it’s being stabbed a million times. You don’t smile back, you can’t bring yourself to.
“Um, I was thinking we could talk at my place?” He asks apprehensively, careful not to say anything wrong. Chanyeol nods when you respond with a shrug. You can’t talk. You’re not even sure you still can, not having talked since Junmyeon got home.
“Did you want to just talk here?” He swallows the lump in his throat, not used to your reaction. He hates this. He just wants the cuddly you from before the trip back. “Are you just going to sit there and not talk to me?”
“You’re the one driving, Yeol.” You finally say, voice so broken that Chanyeol almost rescinds his decision to “talk”, wanting to just hold you in his arms and apologize for even bringing it up. “You can pick where you want to break up with me.”
“Fuck, Y/N.” Chanyeol swears out of frustration, running a hand through his hair. He doesn’t know how you two end up like this so easily. He looks at you and finally sees your red nose and your dried-out eyes. He softens. “Let’s talk first, please.”
“Talk about what? You clearly don’t want anything to do with me anymore.” You turn away, unable to look at him any longer, afraid if you do, you’ll just break down and cry.
“I didn’t say that. I wanted to talk about how I felt-” Chanyeol tries to reason with you but you’re so hurt by him you can’t even listen to his words properly. You cut him off before he could finish his sentence.
“You felt like I was punishing you. I wasn’t. You won’t believe me so let’s just end it, hm?”
“Why are you being like this?” Chanyeol’s heart aches as he hears you speak so harshly towards him.
You want to respond with the words Because I’m terrified I’ve ruined my relationship with Junmyeon. Because I don’t know how to trust again. Because you didn’t say I love you back.
“You’re the one who wanted this. I wanted to fix this on the phone.” is what comes out instead.
“Fine, we’re done.”
“Fine.”
chananyeol bong: i feel like my eczema flared up from writing this lmfao i was stressed out. i hope you guys enjoy it or not loooool im still going to write part 3 no matter what 🫣i also did not review the smut part ok pls forgive me
Synopsis: following the festival, Chanyeol asks reader out... but... does it happen?
A/N: Hello! Sorry this took a bit to post. I'm back with usual updates :p
You stay up sharing all the details of the day to your roommate who was glaring at you under her brows, confident that he was blatantly crushing on you.
“Maybe he’s just nice like this?” You fight back, not too sure who you were trying to convince.
“Sure,” she rolls her eyes, “just a guy who walks around calling you pretty, giving you his hoodie to keep because it looks good on you, and finding every excuse to get you to hang out with him.”
A groan escapes your throat. “I don’t want to think too into it and make a fool of myself.”
“You don’t gotta make a fool of yourself. Just, keep going with the flow. You like hanging out with him, right?” You nod. “There’s nothing to be a fool about.”
You slump further into the couch. “He said he’ll text me.”
“Maybe he will tomorrow. Go to sleep and don’t overthink yourself awake.” She advices as she gets up from the couch.
She leaves you alone for what feels like the first time you were alone with your thoughts today. Glimpses of the day would cross your mind as you stared into space. Chanyeol on stage solely focused on his performance, the look in his eyes after complimenting you, the hum of his car while he drove you. It’s not that you didn’t trust yourself or his intentions, it’s just not often people get an almost-picture-perfect-day with a handsome man.
But your roommate was right on one thing. You’re overthinking. So, you get up intent on showering all the thoughts away from the night. You grab his hoodie and place it on the edge of your bed. You stare at your exchange of good night texts and a shy flutter of butterflies crosses your stomach.
----
Morning came with the sun shining through your window. Chanyeol’s hoodie was the first thing to catch your attention as you got out of bed. It wouldn’t be too weird if I wear it again, right…
Your roommate rummaging outside your bedroom keeps you out of your head. You hear her unlock the front door, and then a yelp. A few seconds later she was rapidly knocking at your door.
You open it and are greeted with a brown bag and a coffee right at your face level. “Breakfast delivery for you, missy”.
You look at her puzzled. “I just woke up. I didn’t order any-”
“Oh my god.” She says.
Your eyes widen at the realization, “You think he ordered me breakfast?”
She hands you both items with a wide smile, “That is for you to figure out”, she winks, “I’ll leave you to it. I can’t be late to work. Text me updates!” She waves a final goodbye before leaving.
You place the items on the counter and inspect the bag. That is in fact your name on the receipt. Inside was a croissant sandwich, a fruit bowl, and a biscotti. The coffee was still a bit warm.
It would make sense for this to be a delivery from Chanyeol, it tracks with his personality. But you didn't want to assume so quickly. But the food is in your apartment already, and that is your name on the receipt. So what else is there to than enjoy it. Sipping on the coffee, you make your way to your room to fetch your phone.
The black hoodie catches your eyes again.
Ah, screw it.
Your place it over your head and a slight smell of laundry mixed with cologned fills your nose. You reach for your phone. Chanyeol hadn’t texted you, but you decide to begin the conversation.
"Good morning!"
You walk back to the kitchen and begin opening the edibles. Your phone vibrates.
"Good morninggg"
You weren’t sure how to begin asking if these were his treats. And he didn’t send a follow up text. So, you stared at the screen for a few seconds after taking a bite of the sandwich. Your phone vibrates again.
"Hey, you should open your door 🥐"
Ah, an admission.
"Oh, you mean to get this?" You reply sending him a picture of the spread in front of you.
He replied with a picture of his coffee. However, his was in a mug, maybe he was still at home.
"Cheers!"
You allow yourself to overanalyze the picture. Zooming into as many details as you could. Only gathering as much as the color of his table, the size of his mug, and that his coffee was dark brown in color.
"What are you up to today?" He follows up
"Just errands in the morning, you?"
"I’m meeting with a client in the afternoon. Would you be free to join me for dinner?"
The butterflies return.
"Yes :) When and where?"
"I would prefer to pick you up, but I’ll be really far out. I’ll send a ride to get you at 6 and we can meet up at this restaurant."
He sends you a screenshot of the place. Cozy dim light establishment.
"Okay, sounds good. Thanks for the treat and the ride."
"No need to thank me. I’m excited to see you again."
"Me too." You reply earnestly.
----
The day goes on without a hitch. Errands are completed, chores are done, you already showered and your clothes for the night are planned. Chanyeol had bid goodbye via text once he left to meet with his client. But he did confirm the ride would get you at 6pm, so you had some time to kill.
After almost an hour of watching mindless TV, your phone buzzes.
"Can I call you?"
An uncomfortable feeling in your stomach replaces the butterflies you felt in the morning.
"Yes"
Almost instantly his name was on your screen, dialing in.
“Hi, is everything okay?” You ask.
“Please don’t think I’m a jack ass”
“What happened?”
“I won't be able to make it to dinner tonight”
“Oh…”
“I am so sorry. This is unlike me. My client is being a bit difficult… they want to finish today and I cannot be done in the next hour.”
“No, I… I understand”
“It’s embarrassing to ask you on a date and then cancel. I’m very sorry.” There was frustration on his tone.
Did he say a date? He did. Was tonight a date?
“Things happen. Work is important.” Was it or not a date, now you're trying to not get too upset or too excited.
“Tomorrow. Tomorrow, I have no appointments. Could we reschedule for lunch?”
“Sure, that’s okay. Tomorrow lunch. Where do I meet you?”
“No. I’ll pick you up. Is 1pm okay?”
“That should work”
“Again, I am so sorry. I’ll text you once I’m finished.”
“Okay, maybe I’ll text you back.” You joke, hoping to alleviate the pressure of expectations.
He lets out a little chuckle and a little sigh of relief. “I have to get back in. Again, I am so sorry. I’ll make it up to you. I’ll talk to you soon.”
chanbaek ⋯ au!hp ⋯ slytherpuff
Oh, to be loved... (PT-BR)
Sinopse: Chanyeol sempre se perguntou se seria amado de verdade. Baekhyun carrega essa resposta há três anos. Entre caos familiar e primeiros beijos, eles descobrem que o amor verdadeiro vale qualquer sacrifício - até se jogar na frente de um balaço.
CAPÍTULO ÚNICO
Como eu consegui estragar tanto assim? , pensou, passando a mão pelos cabelos desgrenhados. A última pergunta sobre poções curativas havia ficado em branco em sua mente, exatamente a área em que ele mais se destacava. Mas como poderia se concentrar quando sua cabeça fervilhava com pensamentos sobre a oportunidade perdida?
Mahoutokoro. A palavra ainda doía como uma ferida aberta. A escola japonesa de magia, tão rígida e prestigiosa que oferecia apenas uma única vaga para intercâmbio internacional. Uma vaga que era sua por direito, conquistada com noites em claro estudando, com dedicação que sangrava pelos poros, com uma paixão pela magia que seus pais jamais conseguiriam compreender.
— Chega, Chanyeol. Já não basta a vergonha de ter que inventar histórias para encobrir que um Park passa o ano inteiro naquela sua escola de anomalias na Escócia? Não vamos mais sustentar essa fantasia doentia. — A voz de seu pai, um rosnado baixo onde cada sílaba pingava desprezo, ainda ecoava em seus ouvidos. Ele havia falado sem sequer olhar para o filho, como se a simples menção daquele mundo fosse algo imundo, algo que ele queria longe de sua casa e de sua vida.
Nem mesmo a diretora McGonagall, com toda sua autoridade e determinação, havia conseguido encontrar uma brecha legal. Afinal ele tinha apenas quinze anos e era um bruxo menor de idade, nunca poderia nem sair do continente sem uma autorização.
Chanyeol seguiu caminhando sem rumo pelo corredor vazio, quando uma figura se desencostou da parede e entrou em seu caminho, forçando-o a parar bruscamente. Era Seiji Montrose, o corvino que ficara em segundo na seleção, que tinha um sorriso presunçoso no rosto.
— Park — disse, a voz escorrendo falsa simpatia. — Ouvi as novidades. Que pena.
Chanyeol tentou dar um passo para o lado, mas Montrose espelhou seu movimento, mantendo-se como uma barreira.
— Na verdade — continuou Seiji, o tom escorrendo um sarcasmo venenoso —, suponho que eu deveria te agradecer. Aos seus pais trouxas, principalmente. Diga a eles que mandarei lembranças do Japão.
Ele inclinou a cabeça, analisando Chanyeol com um ar de superioridade.
— Sejamos sinceros. A vaga para Mahoutokoro, um lugar de precisão e brilhantismo, indo para um... Lufano ? Sempre pareceu um erro de cálculo. É um destino para um Corvino. Felizmente, a ordem natural das coisas sempre encontra um jeito de corrigir essas pequenas distorções.
Chanyeol sentiu as lágrimas queimarem em seus olhos, mas não disse nada. Não havia nada para dizer. Montrose tinha razão, a oportunidade da sua vida havia se perdido, e não havia nada que pudesse fazer para resgatá-la.
O corvino se afastou com um sorriso vitorioso, deixando Chanyeol sozinho com seu desespero crescente. As lágrimas que ele havia estado segurando finalmente começaram a escorrer pelo seu rosto enquanto ele cambaleava em direção às margens do Lago Negro.
O local estava tranquilo, apenas o som suave da água lambendo as pedras da margem quebrava o silêncio. Chanyeol se deixou cair pesadamente em uma das rochas maiores, finalmente permitindo que toda a dor e frustração viessem à tona.
— Era só uma coisa... — sussurrou, a voz quebrando em um soluço contido. — Eu só queria que uma coisa desse certo e agora parece que perdi qualquer chance de ter algo certo na vida.
Como se respondendo ao seu lamento, um tentáculo massivo da lula gigante emergiu graciosamente da água escura, movendo-se com uma elegância quase hipnótica. Os tentáculos se curvaram em sua direção, como se o animal mágico pudesse sentir sua angústia.
— Você vive em um mundo só seu, não é? Cercado pelos seus, mas ainda assim diferente, como se ninguém pudesse realmente te ver. — Chanyeol murmurou, estendendo a mão trêmula, um sorriso triste passou por seus lábios. — Eu sei como é isso.
A lula gigante moveu seus tentáculos suavemente, criando ondas concêntricas na superfície do lago, e Chanyeol quase pôde imaginar que era uma forma de consolo. Ele deixou mais lágrimas caírem livremente, todo o peso da decepção e da rejeição familiar finalmente encontrando uma saída.
— Eu estudei tanto — sussurrou, a voz embargada. — Eu queria tanto provar que podia ser mais do que eles pensam... Mas talvez eles estejam certos. Talvez eu seja apenas um erro, uma anomalia que eles têm que suportar.
Foi então que ouviu passos suaves se aproximando. Chanyeol rapidamente tentou limpar as lágrimas, mas já era tarde demais. Uma figura familiar emergiu das sombras das árvores próximas.
Byun Baekhyun.
O sonserino mais popular de Hogwarts estava ali, suas vestes verde-escuras ondulando suavemente na brisa fresca do final da tarde. Sob a luz dourada do sol que começava a se pôr, seus cabelos negros pareciam brilhar ainda mais, e seus olhos escuros estavam fixos em Chanyeol com uma expressão de preocupação genuína que o ele nunca havia visto antes.
— Chanyeol? — A voz de Baekhyun era suave, quase hesitante. — Você está... você está bem?
O lufano abaixou a cabeça, envergonhado por ter sido pego em um momento tão vulnerável.
— Eu... eu deveria voltar para o castelo — murmurou, começando a se levantar.
— Espera. — A mão de Baekhyun tocou levemente seu ombro, impedindo-o de partir. Sua voz, no entanto, perdeu toda a suavidade e ganhou um tom cortante. — Eu ouvi o que aquele verme do Montrose disse para você. Ignore-o. A opinião de gente como ele não vale o ar que gasta para falar.
Chanyeol olhou para ele com surpresa.
— Você... você estava lá?
— Eu te vi saindo da sala de exames. — Baekhyun admitiu, uma leve vermelhidão subindo por seu pescoço. — Você parecia... destruído. Eu só queria ter certeza de que estava tudo bem.
— Por que você se importaria? — Chanyeol perguntou, genuinamente confuso. — Nós mal conversamos...
Baekhyun hesitou por um momento, seus muitos pensamentos travando uma batalha interna. Então, lentamente, ele se sentou na rocha ao lado de Chanyeol, mantendo uma distância respeitosa mas reconfortante.
— Porque eu sei o quanto isso significava para você — disse suavemente. — Todo mundo em Hogwarts sabe o quanto você se dedicou para conseguir aquela vaga. E eu sei como é ter sonhos que outras pessoas não conseguem entender.
Chanyeol o olhou com novos olhos.
— Baekhyun...
— Seus pais são... limitados — Baekhyun disse, a palavra soando como um insulto velado. — Você é brilhante, Chanyeol. Qualquer escola de magia se orgulharia de tê-lo. Se eles não enxergam isso, o problema é deles. E acredite, "limitados" é o maior elogio que eles jamais ouvirão de mim.
As palavras de Baekhyun o atingiram não como um bálsamo, mas como uma lufada de ar puro em um quarto que esteve abafado por anos. Chanyeol sentiu um nó doloroso em seu peito finalmente começar a se soltar, e as lágrimas que vieram a seus olhos desta vez não eram de tristeza, mas de um alívio tão avassalador que quase o fez engasgar. Ninguém nunca o havia defendido. Ninguém nunca o havia visto daquela forma.
A confissão escapou de seus lábios antes que ele pudesse contê-la, a cabeça baixa para que Baekhyun não visse as novas lágrimas.
— Eu não conseguia ler as perguntas nos N.O.M.s. — A voz dele tremeu, mal passando de um murmúrio. — Eu só conseguia ouvir a voz deles na minha cabeça... dizendo que eu era ingrato. Que eu já tinha Hogwarts, já tinha a magia, e ainda queria mais.
Uma lágrima solitária escapou, e ele a secou com raiva.
— Eles não autorizaram porque acham que eu não mereço. Que a felicidade que eu conquistei sozinho era um exagero que eles precisavam cortar. Como se eu fosse... um erro que eles são forçados a sustenta
Baekhyun se moveu, diminuindo a distância entre eles na rocha. Ele esperou até que Chanyeol, hesitante, erguesse o olhar. A intensidade nos olhos do sonserino era fria e analítica.
— Olhe para mim. — A voz dele era baixa, mas ressoava com uma certeza absoluta. — Ingrato? Eles te dão o mínimo e esperam que você renuncie a tudo que é em troca? Isso não é amor, Chanyeol. É controle.
Ele se aproximou um pouco mais.
— Nunca mais confunda o medo deles com uma falha sua.
A intensidade nos olhos de Baekhyun fez o coração de Chanyeol tropeçar no peito. Não era uma sensação estranha, era... calor. Um calor que começou em seu esterno e se irradiou por cada veia, aquecendo a pele e afugentando o frio que parecia morar nele há tanto tempo.
— Baekhyun... — começou a dizer, mas as palavras morreram em seus lábios quando percebeu o quão próximos eles estavam agora.
O sonserino estava se inclinando para mais perto, seus olhos alternando entre os olhos de Chanyeol e seus lábios. O mundo parecendo encolher ao redor deles, e a brisa do fim da tarde prendia suas respirações.
— Chanyeol — murmurou, sua voz rouca com uma emoção que o Park não conseguia identificar completamente. — Eu...
E então, no calor daquele momento suspenso no tempo, com os últimos raios de sol pintando o lago de laranja e os tentáculos da lula gigante criando um balé silencioso na água, Baekhyun fechou a distância entre eles.
O beijo foi suave no início, hesitante, dando a Chanyeol todo o tempo do mundo para se afastar. Mas quando ele não recuou, quando suas mãos encontraram instintivamente o caminho para os ombros de Baekhyun, o beijo se aprofundou.
Era doce e salgado ao mesmo tempo, doce pela suavidade dos lábios de Baekhyun, salgado pelas lágrimas que ainda manchavam o rosto de Chanyeol. Era reconfortante e eletrizante, familiar e completamente novo. Por um momento, todo o resto do mundo desapareceu. Não havia N.O.M.s falhados, não havia Mahoutokoro perdida, não havia pais desaprovadores ou colegas cruéis. Havia apenas eles dois, e a sensação de que talvez, apenas talvez, Chanyeol não estivesse tão sozinho quanto pensava.
Quando finalmente se separaram, precisando de ar, o mundo voltou a existir com uma pressa violenta. Chanyeol piscou, ofegante, e viu seu próprio espanto refletido nos olhos escuros e arregalados de Baekhyun. Mas por baixo da surpresa, havia algo mais no olhar do sonserino: uma admiração genuína que fez Chanyeol corar violentamente.
Foi então que o som estridente de sinos do toque de recolher ecoou pelos terrenos de Hogwarts, cortando o momento como uma faca.
Chanyeol saltou para trás como se o som fosse um choque físico. A realidade e as consequências. Ele tinha beijado Byun Baekhyun . O pânico, frio e avassalador, tomou conta de seu rosto.
— Eu... eu tenho que ir — gaguejou, sem conseguir encará-lo. Sem esperar por uma resposta, ele saiu correndo em direção ao castelo, deixando Baekhyun sozinho nas margens do lago.
Baekhyun ficou ali, sentado na rocha, os dedos tocando inconscientemente seus próprios lábios. Seu primeiro beijo. Havia sido com Park Chanyeol. O garoto por quem era secretamente apaixonado desde... bem, não desde sempre, mas parecia uma eternidade. A paixão havia começado no terceiro ano, quando a Sonserina e a Lufa-Lufa passaram a dividir a aula de Transfiguração. De repente o mundo do Byun começou a orbitar em volta de uma estrela… alta e desajeitada com cara de cachorrinho abandonado, naquelas aulas ele sentiu seu coração tropeçar pela primeira vez.
Um sorriso bobo começou a se formar em seu rosto, mas foi interrompido quando um tentáculo da lula gigante emergiu da água com mais força, respingando a água gelada do lago sobre ele.
— Obrigado pela ducha fria — murmurou para a criatura, mas seu sorriso não desapareceu completamente.
Foi então que as palavras cruéis de Seiji Montrose voltaram à sua mente. O sorriso no rosto de Baekhyun se desfez instantaneamente, como uma máscara de vidro caindo e se quebrando. A alegria em seus olhos foi substituída por um brilho frio e calculista. O idiota havia ferido seu Chanyeol quando ele já estava em seu momento mais vulnerável, havia pisoteado nos sonhos dele só por puro sadismo.
Baekhyun se levantou da rocha, ajeitando suas vestes com um movimento predatório que seus amigos conheciam muito bem. Seus olhos brilhavam com uma determinação perigosa enquanto ele murmurava para a escuridão crescente, a voz baixa e letal:
— Parece que um certo corvo terá suas asas arrancadas por uma cobra hoje à noite.
[...]
As últimas semanas de férias se arrastaram como uma sentença para Chanyeol. Desde que voltara de Hogwarts, ele mal conseguia olhar para o próprio reflexo sem ser assombrado pela memória daquele fim de tarde nas margens do Lago Negro.
O beijo.
O beijo com Byun Baekhyun
Toda vez que fechava os olhos, sentia novamente os lábios quentes e macios pressionados contra os seus, o cheiro do perfume caro e a sensação de dedos entrelaçados em seus cabelos. Era impossível processar que seu primeiro beijo havia sido com ele — o príncipe de Sonserina, o garoto mais desejado de toda Hogwarts, aquele que podia ter qualquer pessoa que quisesse.
“Por que ele me beijou?”
Se perguntava pela milésima vez, ajeitando a gravata desconfortável que sua mãe havia escolhido para o evento.
“Foi só pena? Impulso? Será que nem lembra?”
A Casa dos Park estava agitada há dias. O noivado de Chanseok, o filho mais velho, seria o evento social da temporada. Empresários importantes, políticos locais, famílias da alta sociedade, todos estariam lá para testemunhar a união entre os Park e os Hayes, duas das famílias mais influentes da região.
— Park Chanyeol! — A voz estridente de sua mãe cortou sua lembrança. — Venha aqui imediatamente!
Ele suspirou, endireitando os ombros antes de descer as escadas. O hall havia sido transformado em algo saído de uma revista, com arranjos florais elaborados e decoração em tons de rosa e dourado. Dezenas de pessoas já circulavam pelo ambiente, conversando em grupos seletos.
— Ah, finalmente. — Sua mãe o examinou com um olhar frio e calculista. — Você está apresentável. Lembre-se: nada de conversas estranhas, nada de mencionar aquela sua escola ou fazer suas esquisitices. Como sempre, se perguntarem, você está estudando em um internato preparatório tradicional. Entendeu?
— Sim, senhora — as palavras saíram automáticas, um roteiro ensaiado.
— E sorria um pouco, pelo amor de Deus. Você parece que está indo para um funeral.
“Talvez eu esteja” , pensou Chanyeol, forçando os cantos dos lábios para cima.
As próximas duas horas foram uma sucessão interminável de apertos de mão forçados e conversas superficiais. Foi durante uma dessas conversas forçadas que sua tia Seoyeon decidiu atacar, como sempre fazia em reuniões familiares.
— Nossa, Chanyeol, — disse com aquele sorriso falso que nunca enganava ninguém — você cresceu, mas continua tão magrinho. Olha só o Chanseok, que homem ele se tornou! Já noivo, assumindo os negócios da família… — Ela suspirou dramaticamente. — Quando você vai seguir o exemplo do seu irmão?
— Eu ainda estou estudando, tia. — A voz saiu mais tensa do que pretendia.
— Ah, sim, esse tal internato. — Ela trocou um olhar cúmplice com a mãe dele. — Sabe, Chanyeol, não é todo mundo que precisa de uma educação tão... especial. O Seok se formou aqui mesmo no St. Augustine e olha onde chegou. Às vezes é melhor ser normal, não acha?
Chanyeol cerrou os punhos discretamente. Normal. Como se ele tivesse escolhido ser diferente.
— Chanyeol tem seu próprio caminho — disse sua mãe, mas o tom não era defensivo, era desculpas.
— Claro, claro. — Tia Seoyeon sorriu condescendente. — Ainda bem que vocês têm o mais velho para carregar o nome da família, não é? Pelo menos um filho que deu certo.
A frase pairou no ar, brutal e definitiva. Chanyeol murmurou uma desculpa qualquer e se afastou, abrindo caminho entre os convidados com a urgência de um homem se afogando. A porta de vidro que levava ao jardim pareceu um portal para a salvação. O ar frio da noite atingiu seu rosto, e ele respirou fundo, o oxigênio gelado queimando seus pulmões, mas limpando a névoa de humilhação.
Foi quando seus olhos se ajustaram à penumbra do jardim que ele o viu. Do outro lado do gramado, parcialmente oculto pela sombra de um salgueiro, estava uma figura que não pertencia àquele lugar. Não era a roupa trouxa, um terno escuro bem cortado, mas a postura. Uma elegância relaxada, uma confiança silenciosa que Chanyeol só via em bruxos de famílias antigas. O cabelo escuro, o perfil afiado sob a luz que vinha da casa...
O ar ficou preso em sua garganta. Baekhyun?
Não , ele recuou um passo, sacudindo a cabeça. Você está quebrando. Está tão desesperado para escapar que sua mente está criando alucinações.
[...]
Algumas horas antes
— Outra vez, nada — Baekhyun rosnou, amassando o pergaminho com frustração. A caligrafia apressada de sua coruja espiã informava apenas que "o jovem Park foi visto lendo no jardim". Inútil. Semanas de relatórios inúteis. Semanas em que a imagem do rosto chocado de Chanyeol fugindo dele o assombrava todas as noites.
“ Será que eu o assustei? Será que ele achou que era uma piada?”
A incerteza o estava corroendo por dentro, mas ele ainda não tinha encontrado a oportunidade perfeita para falar com ele.
— Jovem senhor — a voz aguda de LiuBai, seu elfo doméstico pessoal, ecoou pelo quarto suntuoso —, a coruja trouxe mais informações sobre a casa do jovem Park.
— E? — Baekhyun se virou, a esperança faiscando em seus olhos.
— Hoje à noite é a festa de noivado do irmão mais velho. Muitos convidados, muito movimento. — Os grandes olhos do elfo brilharam com uma astúcia que ia além da de um simples servo. — Talvez seja a oportunidade que o jovem senhor procura?
Baekhyun ponderou, os dedos tamborilando em sua escrivaninha de carvalho. Infiltrar-se em um ninho de trouxas barulhentos. Era arriscado, estúpido, perigoso, mas ao mesm tempo era perfeito. Ele não aguentava mais um dia sem saber o que Chanyeol pensava.
— Prepare uma veste para mim, LiuBai — ordenou. — E a poção para desodorizar trouxas. Não quero ficar com o cheiro deles impregnado.
Duas horas depois, Baekhyun estava encolhido atrás de uma sebe no impecável jardim dos Park. Foi fácil localizar Chanyeol, um farol de infelicidade em um mar de sorrisos falsos. Alto demais, curvado em um terno que não parecia seu, ele tinha a exata postura de quem rezava para que o chão o engolisse. O coração de Baekhyun apertou.
Mas foi quando a brisa trouxe fragmentos da conversa que seu sangue ferveu.
"...pelo menos um filho que deu certo."
Baekhyun viu o rosto de Chanyeol se contorcer em uma máscara de dor silenciosa, viu-o se afastar com os ombros tensos. A raiva que tomou conta do sonserino foi fria e precisa.
Como aqueles vermes medíocres ousavam?
Como ousavam tratar seu Chanyeol, brilhante, gentil, a alma mais resiliente que ele já conhecera, como algo descartável?
— LiuBai — sibilou, a voz baixa e perigosa, sabendo que o elfo estava por perto.
Pop. O elfo apareceu ao seu lado, praticamente invisível contra a escuridão.
— Jovem senhor?
— Preciso de uma distração. Algo que cause confusão suficiente para eu tirar Chanyeol daqui sem ser notado. — Os olhos de Baekhyun brilhavam com uma luz predatória na penumbra. — E que, de preferência, ensine a essa gente que há consequências em menosprezar quem não devem.
— Que tipo de distração o jovem senhor deseja?
Baekhyun olhou para a fonte ornamental e para os arranjos florais perfeitos, um sorriso cruel se formando em seus lábios.
— Use sua criatividade. Mas lembre-se: o alvo não é o Chanyeol. Apenas... crie um caos memorável o suficiente para estragar a noite de todos os outros.
LiuBai sorriu, uma expressão um tanto assustadora em um elfo doméstico.
— LiuBai entende perfeitamente, jovem senhor.
[...]
Chanyeol ainda tentava convencer a si mesmo de que Baekhyun era uma alucinação quando um som borbulhante e úmido cortou o ar, vindo do jardim. Um gorgolejar nojento.
Primeiro foi a fonte. Alguns convidados se viraram a tempo de ver a água cristalina ser substituída por um líquido espesso e marrom que fedia a esgoto. Gritos de nojo ecoaram, mas foram imediatamente abafados por uma nova onda de pânico vinda do buffet.
A comida apodrecia com um som sibilante e úmido, se desfazendo em tempo real, liberando uma nuvem física de podridão que fez os convidados recuarem, engasgando. Os arranjos florais murcharam instantaneamente, suas cores vibrantes se tornando um preto fúnebre e pegajoso.
No meio do pandemônio, um único som se ergueu, mais aterrorizante que qualquer grito: a voz de seu pai.
— CHANYEOL!
O nome dele, cuspido como uma maldição. O som fez o mundo parar. De repente, cada par de olhos naquela sala — chocados, enojados, curiosos — estava fixado nele. Ele era o centro do desastre.
— O que diabos você fez dessa vez? — O rosto do Sr. Park estava de um vermelho furioso enquanto ele marchava em sua direção.
— Eu não...
— NÃO MINTA PARA MIM! — O pai o agarrou pelo braço, o aperto como ferro, as unhas cravando em sua pele. — Você é a única aberração nesta casa capaz de fazer... isso !
Chanyeol olhou ao redor, o pânico subindo por sua garganta como bile. Como ele poderia provar sua inocência? Para eles, sua magia não era um dom; era uma falha, a fonte de todo o mal.
— Por favor — tentou, a voz esganiçada. — Eu juro, não fui eu. Eu nem...
Mas seus pais não estavam ouvindo. A festa havia se tornado um pandemônio. Convidados fugiam do fedor, copos se estilhaçavam, e o bolo de três andares foi ao chão, um monumento de açúcar destruído no mármore.
— Décadas — sussurrou a mãe de Chanyeol, mas não havia tristeza em sua voz, apenas o gelo da humilhação social. Seus olhos não estavam em Chanyeol, mas no desastre, calculando os danos à sua reputação perfeita. — Décadas construindo nossa reputação nesta cidade, e você... você destruiu tudo em cinco minutos
— Mãe, eu...
— CALE A BOCA! — O pai o agarrou pelos ombros, sacudindo-o com força, fazendo o mundo de Chanyeol girar. — Chega de magia, chega de aberrações! Você não vai voltar para aquela escola de anormais no ano que vem!
As palavras o atingiram com a força de uma Maldição Imperdoável. Não voltar para Hogwarts. O mundo de Chanyeol, já frágil, se estilhaçou. Hogwarts não era uma escola. Era sua casa. Sua vida. O único lugar onde ele podia respirar.
Seus olhos procuraram o jardim automaticamente, uma prece desesperada, mas o lugar onde vira Baekhyun estava, e sempre esteve, vazio. A esperança era uma alucinação, afinal.
— Subam esse moleque para o quarto — ordenou seu pai aos empregados, que se aproximaram com os rostos cheios de pena. — E tranquem a porta. Não quero ver a cara dele por meses.
Enquanto era arrastado escada acima, a última coisa que Chanyeol viu foi o bolo de noivado espatifado no chão, uma metáfora perfeita para sua vida.
[...]
Baekhyun assistiu a tudo, paralisado e escondido nas sombras, o horror gelando seu sangue. Cada grito, cada acusação injusta, era uma facada em seu peito. Quando o pai de Chanyeol o agarrou, um rosnado involuntário escapou dos lábios de Baekhyun. Ele deu um passo à frente, a varinha já em sua mão, antes de se forçar a parar. Intervir agora só provaria que eles estavam certos. Só condenaria Chanyeol ainda mais.
Ele viu, impotente, enquanto Chanyeol era arrastado para dentro, derrotado.
— LiuBai — sibilou, a voz carregada de um pânico desesperado —, desfaça isso. Agora. Faça tudo voltar ao normal.
— LiuBai não pode, jovem senhor — a voz do elfo era um sussurro aflito, cheio de um pesar genuíno. — A magia da travessura foi tecida. Ela deve seguir seu curso. Desfazê-la abruptamente deixaria um rastro que o Ministério detectaria em segundos.
Baekhyun cerrou os punhos, a madeira da varinha se cravando em sua palma. A luz do quarto de Chanyeol se acendeu no segundo andar, e lá estava ele... uma silhueta solitária sentada na cama, um prisioneiro em seu próprio quarto, ainda vestindo o terno amarrotado da festa que deveria ter sido sua humilhação, mas que se tornou sua prisão.
“O que foi que eu fiz?” O pensamento não era uma pergunta, era uma condenação. Ele, seu elfo e sua magia poderosa, haviam invadido o frágil mundo de Chanyeol e o quebrado. Ele não o salvara; ele o havia enjaulado.
E agora Chanyeol estava lá em cima, sozinho, sem dúvida se culpando, pensando que sua própria magia havia se voltado contra ele, carregando um fardo que pertencia a Baekhyun.
Ele ficou ali, no frio crescente da noite. Apenas aquela única janela permaneceu acesa, um farol de sua culpa. Ele a observou por uma hora, talvez mais, até que a escuridão finalmente a engoliu.
Só então ele se virou, o movimento rígido e doloroso. Pela primeira vez ele causou um desastre do qual não se orgulhava, afinal o resultado foi ver seu lufano sendo tratado como um criminoso.
[...]
A Mansão Byun parecia ainda mais imponente à luz do luar, suas torres góticas e gárgulas ornamentais criando sombras dramáticas nos jardins perfeitamente cuidados.
Baekhyun aterrissou suavemente nos portões, sua silhueta refletida no mármore negro do caminho. Antes mesmo que pudesse alcançar a porta, ela se abriu com um rangido teatral que seus pais adoravam manter para "atmosfera adequada".
LiuBai apareceu ao seu lado e pegou a vassoura das mãos do Byun, fazendo uma reverência profunda antes de desaparecer com outro pop silencioso.
— Baekhyun-ah — A voz melodiosa de sua mãe ecoou pelo hall. — Que bom que voltou, querido. Sua presença é requerida no escritório, temos uma carta muito interessante do Ministério para discutir com você.
“Merda” , pensou Baekhyun.
Encontrou os pais no escritório. Lorde Taekros Byun estava de pé atrás da poltrona de couro de sua esposa, Madame Serin, os dedos enredados em seus longos cabelos negros. Ambos ergueram o olhar quando Baekhyun entrou, o mesmo sorriso divertido e ligeiramente perigoso espelhado em seus rostos. O pergaminho do Ministério estava casualmente colocado ao lado dela, como se fosse uma nota social qualquer.
— Meu pequeno causador de problemas — disse Taekros com um gesto teatral, mas um sorriso nos lábios. — Sente-se. Vamos desvendar esse drama.
Baekhyun obedeceu, sentindo o peso do julgamento silencioso dos retratos de seus ancestrais alinhados nas paredes. Seus olhos, tão astutos e determinados quanto os dele, pareciam sussurrar: "Um Byun não é apanhado."
Seorin apontou para o pergaminho com o selo do Ministério.
— Parece que nosso LiuBai se empolgou um pouco... Magia residual de elfo em um evento dos trouxas e na presença de dois menores identificados... você e... ah, que interessante... o jovem Park Chanyeol. Aquele talento nascido-trouxa da Lufa-Lufa. — Seus olhos se fixaram em Baekhyun, uma sobrancelha perfeitamente arqueada. — Estávamos cientes de seu interesse pelo garoto. Mas admito que subestimamos a intensidade do seu cortejo.
O rosto de Baekhyun aqueceu, mas não de vergonha. Era a cor da frustração pura. Claro que eles sabiam. Ele nunca escondeu seu fascínio por Chanyeol. O que o humilhava era o fato de que sua primeira grande tentativa de agir sobre essa paixão havia resultado em um fracasso tão espetacular e, pior, tornado público para sua família.
Taekros emitiu um som baixo, quase um rugido de satisfação.
— Um caos em uma celebração de trouxas? Que peça de teatro deliciosamente vulgar. Um nascido-trouxa com poder suficiente para incitar tal pandemônio... e cativar a atenção de um Byun. Isso é... notável. — Ele se virou para a esposa, um brilho de genuíno interesse nos olhos. — Parece que criamos um romântico estratégico, amor.
— Estratégia é uma palavra generosa para isto, querido — contrapos Serin, seu olhar nunca deixando Baekhyun, um sorriso quase imperceptível tocando seus lábios. — Baekhyun-ah, meu filho, não questionamos sua motivação. A lealdade a um interesse romântico é uma virtude Byun, ainda que... vigorosamente executada. Questionamos sua tática . Empregar a magia da família, nossos elfos, em um palco tão... mundano ... e sem a devida consulta? E, crucialmente, qual era o objetivo final?
A pergunta, feita com uma doçura cortante, arrancou o ar de Baekhyun. Eles não estavam irados pelo caos, mas pela falta de sofisticação ao ter sido detectado pelo Ministério da Magia.
— Eu... fui lá pra falar com ele — a voz de Baekhyun saiu mais fraca do que ele gostaria. — Depois do que aconteceu... depois do beijo... a gente não se falou. Eu fui um covarde. E eu percebi que não podia deixar ele no escuro, pensando que aquele beijo não significou nada pra mim. Eu precisava me explicar. Dizer que eu me importo.
Ele respirou fundo, olhando para as mãos.
— Eu sabia que ia ser um evento horrível pra ele. Achei que se eu causasse uma distração... algo que chamasse a atenção de todo mundo... eu poderia roubar um minuto com ele. Só um minuto. Ordenei ao LiuBai que causasse um alvoroço. Só um pequeno alvoroço. — Sua voz falhou. — Mas eu estava com raiva. Eu vi eles humilhando ele, tratando ele como se a magia dele fosse uma doença. Aqueles... trouxas . E a minha raiva... deve ter passado pra ordem. O LiuBai exagerou. E deu tudo errado. Chanyeol levou a culpa por algo que eu causei.
A palavra "culpa" ecoou na sala. Baekhyun se lembrou do olhar confuso e machucado de Chanyeol sendo levado embora.
— Uma combinação clássica para o desastre. Nunca peça uma distração pra uma criatura mágica se você quer um sussurro. Eles só sabem fazer estrondo. — comentou Taekros, como se estivesse analisando uma peça de teatro, com um misto de reprovação e diversão.
— Um plano que termina com o objeto de sua afeição pagando o preço é, por definição, um plano falho, Baekhyun — observou Serin com sua franqueza habitual. — Um Byun protege o que é valioso, não o coloca na linha de fogo.
Nesse momento, uma pequena figura irrompeu na sala. Baekyeon a irmã mais nova, com a varinha de brinquedo em punho.
Hades, o gato, começou a brilhar com um intenso tom de púrpura neón, miando ofendido.
— Ah, magnífico! — Taekros suspirou, lágrimas de orgulho brilhando em seus olhos. — Que precisão! Já supera os feitiços de muitos do terceiro ano, minha pequena serpente! A translucidez cromática é impecável!
Baekyeon deu uma risadinha e tentou escapar, mas seu pai, com um sorriso largo, girou elegantemente a sua própria varinha. Uma barreira invisível e suave impediu-a de alcançar a porta, fazendo-a ricochetear para trás.
Ele apanhou-a ao colo.
— Venha, prodígio, vamos testar se consegue alterar a cor das chamas da lareira sem incinerar as cortinas. — Virou-se para a esposa. — Querida, você é a melhor para lidar com nosso filho. Tenho que ir, assuntos prementes de magia experimental me aguardam.
Serin esperou que a porta se fechasse e voltou-se para Baekhyun, o tom agora sério e maternal.
— A nobreza de nossa casa, meu bem, não reside em subterfúgios ou em tramoias mal concebidas. Um Byun assume seus erros de frente e conquista o que deseja com inteligência e coragem.
— Não demore para contar a verdade para esse garoto. Toda ela. O beijo, o arrependimento, a tentativa falha de ajudar. Deixe claro: 'A culpa foi minha, não sua'. Senão, você vai machucá-lo não com feitiços, mas com sua covardia. — Ela fez uma pausa. — E se continuar tomando decisões por ele, 'pelo bem dele', você não é melhor que aquela família trouxa medíocre que ele tem.
As palavras atingiram Baekhyun como um feitiço de gelo. Ela estava certa.
— O que eu faço? — sua voz saiu quebrada, a fachada do sonserino confiante completamente despedaçada.
— Você vai até ele — disse ela, firmemente. — E se explica. Como um homem, não como um garoto assustado. — Ela se ergueu, passando a mão pelo cabelo dele. — E querido... se a magia escolheu aquele garoto, se ele é tão especial a ponto de fazer você perder a cabeça assim, ele merece saber que tem ao seu lado alguém disposto a ser tolo e corajoso por ele.
Enquanto subia a escadaria de mármore para o seu quarto, Baekhyun parou em frente à galeria de retratos de seus ancestrais. Todos o encaravam com a mesma determinação afiada que ele via em seu próprio reflexo.
A promessa queimou em seu peito, mais forte que qualquer feitiço. Ele tinha feito tudo errado. Mas não ia fugir de novo.
“Nunca mais. Nunca mais ninguém fará Chanyeol sofrer. Especialmente eu.”
[...]
O quarto de Chanyeol era a sua prisão dourada. Faltava um dia para o Expresso de Hogwarts partir, e cada segundo que passava era um grão de areia caindo em uma ampulheta que media o fim de sua vida como a conhecia. As duas semanas de confinamento o haviam deixado com a companhia de livros trouxas que ele não lia e de pensamentos que giravam em um ciclo torturante.
Ele se levantou e foi até a janela, um ritual que repetia dezenas de vezes ao dia. O jardim, quase recuperado do desastre da festa de noivado, era um lembrete constante da injustiça que o aprisionara. Mas o caos daquele dia era apenas um eco de um desastre mais antigo, o do final do quinto ano.
Sua mente o arrastou de volta para as margens do Lago Negro. No último dia de aula ele tinha ido para lá fugindo de tudo, chorando, escondido do mundo, quando uma figura se sentou ao seu lado.
Baekhyun.
Chanyeol fechou os olhos, a lembrança ainda vívida o suficiente para fazer seu coração doer. A sensação dos lábios de Baekhyun contra os seus, quentes e surpreendentemente macios. O cheiro do perfume caro misturado com algo que era puramente ele.
E então, o pânico.
Aquele calor, aquela gentileza... era demais. Intenso demais para sua mente já em frangalhos. E ele fizera a única coisa que sabia fazer quando estava sobrecarregado: ele correu. Fugindo (de novo) de volta para o castelo, deixando Baekhyun sozinho na margem do lago.
O verão inteiro foi uma consequência daquele ato de covardia. Como ele poderia mandar uma coruja? O que ele diria? O silêncio se estendeu, alimentado por sua própria vergonha.
E agora, para onde ele voltaria, mesmo que conseguisse escapar? Kyungsoo, já tinha partido para a França.
A ideia de um plano de fuga parecia fútil. Usar magia era suicídio ministerial. Pedir ajuda? A quem? A solidão era uma parede alta e lisa.
O nome de Baekhyun surgiu, como sempre fazia, uma mistura de esperança e mortificação.
Ele se afastou da janela e voltou para a cama, o peso da realidade esmagando a calidez da lembrança. Seu melhor amigo se fora. O garoto que o beijou provavelmente pensava que ele era um covarde. E ele estava preso.
O silêncio que se seguiu à sua conclusão desesperada — sozinho, completamente e irremediavelmente sozinho — foi quebrado. Não por uma voz familiar, mas por uma batida firme e autoritária na porta da frente, um som que não pertencia à monotonia controlada daquela casa.
Chanyeol ouviu os passos apressados de sua mãe, sua voz tensa e irritada. Uma discussão abafada. Minutos depois, a chave girou na fechadura de seu quarto.
— Chanyeol — a voz dela era uma ordem disfarçada de pedido —, desça. Temos uma visita.
Confuso e receoso, ele obedeceu. E parou no meio da escada, o ar faltando em seus pulmões. Sentada impecavelmente na sala de estar, fazendo seus pais parecerem meros alunos em detenção, estava a diretora de Hogwarts.
— Professora McGonagall?
— Sr. Park — ela assentiu, mas seus olhos penetrantes estavam fixos nele, e por um instante, Chanyeol sentiu um calor que não vinha do sol. — Tive uma conversa muito... esclarecedora com seus pais sobre seus planos educacionais. Sente-se.
Ele se sentou na beirada de uma poltrona, as mãos suando.
— Chegou ao meu conhecimento que o sr não retornaria a Hogwarts — começou ela, direta. — Devido a um... incidente.
A vergonha o atingiu como uma onda física. Ela sabia. O mundo inteiro sabia.
— Incidente este que, segundo o relatório oficial do Ministério da Magia, não teve absolutamente nenhuma participação sua — McGonagall continuou, sua voz cortando o ar como vidro. — O senhor é, para todos os efeitos legais, inocente.
A palavra ecoou na mente de Chanyeol. Inocente? Ele olhou para seus pais, que se encolheram no sofá.
— Professora... — começou seu pai, com um tom arrogante. — O que acontece no mundo de vocês não nos diz respeito. Nossa decisão é sobre garantir que Chanyeol tenha uma vida normal, respeitável.
McGonagall arqueou uma sobrancelha, uma expressão que faria um Ministro da Magia repensar suas decisões.
— "Respeitável", Sr. Park? Seu filho foi selecionado para um intercâmbio em Mahoutokoro, uma honra acadêmica de prestígio internacional que ele perdeu por sua recusa. Ele tem o potencial para posições de grande influência e poder. Acha mesmo que trocá-lo por uma escola trouxa qualquer é uma decisão "respeitável"?
— Nós não queremos aberrações nesta casa! — explodiu a mãe de Chanyeol.
— Então sugiro que tomem cuidado — retrucou McGonagall, a voz baixando para um nível perigosamente calmo. — Porque a magia suprimida tem o hábito de se manifestar de formas... incontroláveis. Imagine, se quiser, um outro surto mágico imprevisível durante um de seus jantares de gala. Um escândalo que nem todo o seu status conseguiria abafar. O Ministério teria que intervir. Aurores, Obliviadores... uma mancha permanente em sua reputação perfeita.
O silêncio que se seguiu foi total. Chanyeol viu a cor sumir do rosto de seus pais. McGonagall não estava mais falando de educação; estava falando de destruição social. A única ameaça que eles entenderiam.
— Ele é um bruxo. Um fato imutável — declarou a diretora. — A única escolha que os senhores têm é se ele se tornará um bruxo controlado, brilhante e que trará honra ao nome da família em círculos de poder que vocês nem imaginam... ou uma bomba-relógio esperando para destruir tudo que vocês construíram. A decisão é sua.
Chanyeol observou, fascinado, a batalha silenciosa. Não era sobre amor. Era sobre medo.
— Ele pode voltar — disse seu pai finalmente, a voz tensa. — Mas sem problemas.
— Excelente — McGonagall se levantou, vitoriosa. — Sendo assim, o Sr. Park virá comigo agora. Ele precisa comprar seus materiais e eu o acompanharei pessoalmente até a plataforma amanhã.
Ela se virou para Chanyeol, com um olhar cúmplice sobre os óculos, entregou-lhe o pergaminho oficial.
— Esta é sua cópia do relatório do Ministério. Creio que achará... esclarecedor.
Chanyeol pegou a carta com mãos trêmulas e, quando seus olhos percorreram o texto oficial, seu coração quase parou:
"Incidente mágico registrado em residência trouxa. Elfos domésticos sob comando realizaram magia não autorizada. Menores de idade presentes no local: Park Chanyeol e Byun Baekhyun. Nenhuma magia realizada pelos menores detectada."
Byun Baekhyun.
Ele estava lá. Ele realmente estava lá. E de alguma forma... seus elfos haviam causado toda aquela destruição.
Mas por quê?
[...]
Baekhyun estava deitado no chão de seu quarto, encarando o teto ornamentado quando LiuBai apareceu com um pop discreto.
— Jovem senhor — o elfo disse, seus grandes olhos brilhando de excitação — LiuBai tem notícias importantes.
Baekhyun se sentou imediatamente. Nas últimas semanas, havia mandado sua coruja espiã vigiar a casa dos Park quase constantemente, esperando por qualquer sinal de mudança na situação.
— O que aconteceu?
— A diretora McGonagall esteve na casa dos Park hoje — LiuBai relatou. — Ela saiu com o jovem Park e o acompanhou até um lugar no mundo bruxo. Ele estava carregando um baú escolar.
O coração de Baekhyun disparou.
— Ele... ele vai voltar para Hogwarts?
— Parece que sim, jovem senhor. A coruja relatou que houve uma longa conversa na sala, e depois os pais trouxas pareciam... menos hostis.
Baekhyun se levantou de um pulo, uma mistura de alívio e nervosismo tomando conta dele. Chanyeol ia voltar. Ele havia conseguido, ou melhor, a professora McGonagall havia conseguido resolver a situação.
Mas isso também significava que ele teria que enfrentar Chanyeol em Hogwarts. Teria que explicar tudo. Teria que lidar com as consequências de suas ações.
E se ele me odeia? A dúvida familiar voltou a atormentá-lo. E se descobriu que fui eu e nunca mais quer me ver?
Mas então se lembrou das palavras de sua mãe: Se esse garoto é realmente tão especial quanto você acredita, então ele merece saber que tem alguém disposto a lutar por ele.
— LiuBai — disse finalmente, a determinação voltando à sua voz — prepare minhas coisas. Vamos voltar para Hogwarts.
E desta vez, ele não fugiria. Não importava o que acontecesse, ele diria a verdade para Chanyeol. Toda a verdade.
[...]
O balanço suave do Expresso de Hogwarts era um som familiar, mas, pela primeira vez, não trazia conforto a Chanyeol. Encostado na janela de um compartimento vazio, ele se sentia um estranho em seu próprio caminho de volta para casa. A ausência de Kyungsoo ao seu lado era uma dor aguda, um lembrete constante de que enfrentaria o sexto ano sozinho.
Mas sob a melancolia da solidão, uma ansiedade mais complexa fervia. A carta do Ministério, que ele já sabia de cor, estava guardada em seu malão. Byun Baekhyun . Uma parte dele, a parte confusa, exigia respostas. Queria encontrar o sonserino e confrontá-lo sobre o caos do noivado, sobre o beijo, sobre o silêncio. A outra parte, a exausta, só queria paz. Queria esquecer tudo, focar nos estudos e sobreviver ao ano letivo sem mais drama. Ele suspirou, a decisão se solidificando com pesar. Esquecer. Era mais seguro.
Foi então que a porta do compartimento deslizou, revelando a fonte de todo o seu dilema.
Baekhyun estava parado ali, as mãos nos bolsos de suas vestes impecáveis, mas sua postura era tensa. Ele parecia ter ensaiado mil frases e esquecido todas no instante em que seus olhos encontraram os de Chanyeol.
— Desculpe — disse Baekhyun, a voz mais baixa que o normal. — Os outros vagões estão cheios. Posso?
O coração de Chanyeol deu um salto. Ele apenas acenou, as orelhas esquentando.
Baekhyun entrou e sentou-se no banco oposto. O silêncio que se instalou era denso, carregado com o peso de tudo o que havia acontecido. Por um momento, Chanyeol pensou que seu plano de "esquecer" seria fácil; bastava não dizer nada.
— Você não estava chorando, estava? — perguntou Baekhyun, o tom genuinamente preocupado, quebrando o silêncio.
A pergunta pegou Chanyeol desprevenido, e sua boca se moveu mais rápido que seu cérebro, o sarcasmo sendo (incrivelmente) sua única defesa.
— Por quê? Vai me dar outro beijo?
Assim que as palavras saíram, Chanyeol se arrependeu, o rosto queimando. Mas para sua surpresa, um pequeno sorriso genuíno curvou os lábios de Baekhyun.
— Se você me pedisse, eu não negaria — respondeu ele, a voz baixa e séria, mantendo o olhar de Chanyeol.
O ar no compartimento, antes pesado, de repente ficou mais leve. Chanyeol se pegou sorrindo de volta, um sorriso pequeno, mas real. Naquele momento, eles não eram o garoto quieto e o senhor popular com um milhão de coisas não resolvidas. Eram apenas... eles. E, para o espanto de Chanyeol, estar ali com Baekhyun pareceu a coisa mais natural do mundo.
A intensidade do olhar de Baekhyun, no entanto, o deixou sem graça, e ele sentiu a necessidade de quebrar o silêncio.
— Foi mal... eu não devia ter dito aquilo sobre o beijo — murmurou Chanyeol, olhando para as próprias mãos. — É que... — ele hesitou, tomando coragem — aquele foi meu primeiro beijo. Então eu fico meio... sem saber como agir.
Baekhyun o encarou, a surpresa genuína em seu rosto suavizando ainda mais suas feições. Ele não zombou, nem pareceu presunçoso. Apenas processou a informação por um instante.
— Seu primeiro? — perguntou ele, a voz baixa e com um leve tom de alívio.
Chanyeol assentiu, esperando o golpe, a piada. Mas ela não veio.
— Então nós temos isso em comum — disse Baekhyun, e a sinceridade em sua voz quebrou as últimas defesas de Chanyeol. — Porque aquele também foi o meu primeiro beijo.
Chanyeol ergueu o olhar, incrédulo.
— Seu? Duvido. Você é... você.
— Por que a surpresa? — Baekhyun inclinou a cabeça, o olhar percorrendo o rosto de Chanyeol como um mestre avaliando uma obra de arte. — Você visita centenas de galerias, vê milhares de cópias... mas guarda seu apreço para a obra-prima. Eu não ia gastar meu primeiro beijo em uma imitação.
A revelação pairou no ar. O primeiro beijo dele também . A pequena chama de esperança que Chanyeol tentava apagar voltou a brilhar.
— Então por que... — ele começou, a pergunta mais importante de todas, prestes a ser feita.
A porta do compartimento deslizou abruptamente.
— Opa, desculpem — Minseok apareceu, o distintivo de monitor brilhando em seu peito. — Baek, a reunião de monitores. O professor Frank está chamando.
Baekhyun fechou os olhos, uma expressão de pura frustração em seu rosto. Ao abri-los, olhou para Chanyeol, e havia uma promessa ali.
— A gente... a gente se vê no castelo? — ele perguntou, levantando-se a contragosto. — Precisamos terminar essa conversa.
Chanyeol apenas conseguiu acenar. Enquanto a porta se fechava, ele notou o distintivo no peito de Minseok. Ele também poderia ter sido monitor este ano, mas os candidatos ao intercâmbio só podiam aceitar o cargo no quinto ano. Outra coisa que ele havia perdido.
Mas a melancolia durou pouco, substituída por uma urgência ansiosa. O dilema de antes, de esquecer ou confrontar, havia desaparecido. A conversa fora... fácil. Natural. Agora, mais do que nunca, ele não queria apenas respostas; ele queria mais daquela sensação.
Ele precisava terminar aquela conversa. E, pela primeira vez, a ideia não o assustava. Pelo contrário, o enchia de uma expectativa que ele não ousava nomear.
[...]
Com a promessa feita no trem ainda ecoando em sua mente, Baekhyun chegou a Hogwarts com uma única missão: encontrar Chanyeol. No entanto, parecia que o universo, que por anos havia conspirado para mantê-los em órbitas separadas, agora conspirava ativamente para impedir qualquer colisão. De repente, todos em Hogwarts precisavam de um pedaço de Byun Baekhyun.
A primeira tentativa veio no início das aulas de Feitiços da sexta-feira quando Baekhyun chegou propositalmente atrasado, com um plano simples: a maioria das mesas estaria ocupada, dando-lhe a desculpa perfeita para se sentar no único lugar vago... ao lado de Chanyeol. Seus olhos encontraram imediatamente a mesa no meio da sala onde o lufano estava sozinho. Perfeito.
Mas sua estratégia foi por água abaixo quando uma voz desconhecida e excessivamente animada o interceptou.
— Ah, Sr. Byun, que ótimo! — disse o Professor Gomez, o substituto temporário de Feitiços, um bruxo baixo com um bigode que parecia ter vida própria. — Junte-se a nós! Estava justamente sorteando as duplas para o Feitiço de Animação de hoje!
Antes que Baekhyun pudesse protestar, pequenos pergaminhos saíram voando da varinha do professor, cada um carregando o nome de um aluno.
— Kim Jongdae, você fará par com... Liam Vance! — anunciou Gomez, enquanto os pergaminhos dançavam no ar. — Baekhyun Byun, sua dupla será... Im Jae-beom! E, finalmente, Chanyeol Park... você trabalhará com Finnian O'Malley!
Baekhyun assistiu, a mandíbula cerrada, enquanto Chanyeol se levantava e se dirigia para a mesa de Finnian no outro lado da sala. Por um breve instante, seus olhares se cruzaram sobre o burburinho da classe. Não havia engano: a mesma frustração impotente que Baekhyun sentia estava perfeitamente espelhada nos olhos de Chanyeol antes que ele se virasse.
[...]
A biblioteca ao final da tarde era um santuário. O único som era o sussurro ocasional de páginas se virando sozinhas para se limparem e o cheiro de poeira mágica e pergaminho antigo. Baekhyun entrou, usando a desculpa de procurar um livro de Runas, mas seus olhos varriam o local com um propósito diferente. Ele procurava por cabelos escuros e ombros largos...
E então ele o viu. No canto mais afastado, sob a luz dourada de uma única vela flutuante, Chanyeol dormia.
Sua cabeça estava aninhada sobre os braços cruzados, o rosto virado na direção de Baekhyun. As pestanas longas criavam sombras suaves em suas bochechas, e seus lábios estavam ligeiramente entreabertos. No sono, ele parecia mais jovem, despojado de toda a ansiedade que carregava durante o dia. Livros de Poções avançadas estavam espalhados ao seu redor, a caligrafia cuidadosa em seus pergaminhos era uma prova do esforço que o levara à exaustão.
O coração de Baekhyun deu um salto. Era a oportunidade perfeita. Silêncio. Privacidade. Ele poderia simplesmente tocar o ombro de Chanyeol, acordá-lo gentilmente e... finalmente, ter a conversa que o consumia.
Sua mão se moveu por conta própria, os dedos pairando a centímetros do braço de Chanyeol. Mas ele parou. Olhou para a mancha de tinta nos dedos do lufano, para a exaustão gravada em seu rosto, mesmo no sono. O plano egoísta de Baekhyun, sua necessidade desesperada por alívio, pareceu subitamente cruel. Acordá-lo agora seria apenas para satisfazer sua própria ansiedade, não para ajudar Chanyeol.
Recuando a mão, ele tirou sua capa, feita sob medida para o sonserino e com o brasão dos Byun bordado discretamente no interior. Com um cuidado que ele raramente dedicava a qualquer coisa, ele o colocou sobre os ombros largos de Chanyeol, cobrindo-o até a cintura. O lufano suspirou suavemente no sono, aconchegando-se inconscientemente no calor sem acordar.
A conversa podia esperar. O conforto de Chanyeol, no entanto, não.
Com um último olhar demorado, Baekhyun se virou e saiu da biblioteca tão silenciosamente quanto entrou, deixando o livro de Runas e sua própria angústia para trás.
[...]
Os dias seguintes se tornaram um borrão de quase-encontros e olhares furtivos. A gentileza na biblioteca agora tina um tanto de arrependimento por parte de Baekhyun; sua paciência estava se esgotando. Cada oportunidade perdida aumentava sua frustração. Ele precisava ser mais direto. Mais ousado.
Desesperado por uma abordagem direta, Baekhyun recorreu ao método mais clássico: um bilhete.
"Encontre-me na torre de Astronomia à meia-noite. - B".
Ele o enviou por uma coruja emprestada, o coração martelando enquanto a observava voar até a mesa da Lufa-Lufa. Ele viu Chanyeol receber a mensagem, viu os olhos dele se arregalarem ligeiramente ao ler o conteúdo e, crucialmente, viu o aceno quase imperceptível que ele deu antes de guardar o pergaminho.
À meia-noite, Baekhyun estava no local combinado, o vento frio chicoteando suas vestes. Meia-noite e quinze. Meia-noite e trinta. O relógio bateu uma da madrugada. E o topo da torre permaneceu vazio. A decepção era uma pedra fria no estômago de Baekhyun. Ele havia sido ignorado.
O que Baekhyun não sabia era que, no corredor úmido perto das cozinhas, Chanyeol batia no barril errado pela quinquagésima vez, sussurrando maldições. A senha rítmica da Lufa-Lufa, havia sido temporariamente alterada por causa de uma pegadinha dos alunos do terceiro ano, e agora o barril o encharcava com vinagre a cada tentativa falha. Ele estava preso, a corredores de distância, tão frustrado quanto Baekhyun se sentia rejeitado.
[...]
O Salão Principal fervilhava... Baekhyun mal tocou em sua comida, os olhos fixos na mesa da Lufa-Lufa... É agora ou nunca , pensou.
Sentar-se na mesa de outra casa iria gerar um burburinho que no passado ele evitaria que Chanyeol tivesse que escutar. Mas era uma questão de vida ou morte.
Ele se levantou, ignorando os olhares surpresos. Cada passo parecia levar uma eternidade... Ele estava a apenas três passos da mesa.
Chanyeol, que o viu se aproximando, ergueu o olhar, uma expressão de surpresa e talvez esperança em seu rosto.
— BYUN BAEKHYUN!
A voz da Professora McGonagall cortou o ar com a precisão de um feitiço. Baekhyun congelou.
— Sua presença como monitor é necessária. Imediatamente.
Ele lançou um olhar desesperado para Chanyeol. Por um segundo, a frustração compartilhada passou entre eles, clara como o dia. Mas então Baekhyun se foi, deixando Chanyeol o observando se afastar, e a oportunidade mais ousada de todas perdida no meio do grande salão.
[...]
— Terminamos por hoje, Baek. Nenhuma gárgula cantando ópera ou qualquer outra coisa entediante nesta ronda igualmente entediante — disse Minseok, ao final da ronda dos monitores.
— Ah, que alívio — a voz de Baekhyun pingava sarcasmo. — Agora posso voltar para a minha agenda lotada de... nada que importe. Qual é o ponto de ser o príncipe da Sonserina se eu não consigo nem cinco minutos com a única pessoa que eu quero ver?
— Calma, vocês vão se falar.
— "Calma"? — Baekhyun repetiu a palavra como se fosse um sabor ruim. — Que conselho tão... prático. E completamente inútil. O universo não se importa com a minha calma, Minseok, ele se diverte com a minha frustração. E a comédia de hoje inclui um treino obrigatório. Talvez um balaço perdido me dê um pouco de paz. Seria... eficiente .
Ele se afastou, deixando Minseok balançando a cabeça enquanto se dirigia a contragosto para o campo de quadribol.
[...]
O dormitório lufano parecia estranhamente vazio sem a presença de Kyungsoo. Chanyeol estava sentado em sua cama, encarando a capa da Sonserina pendurado em sua cadeira como se fosse uma acusação. A capa de Baekhyun.
Ele havia tentado devolvê-lo duas vezes, mas sempre desistia ao ver Baekhyun rodeado de amigos, rindo, sendo o centro das atenções. A simples ideia de se aproximar, de enfrentar os olhares e as fofocas, fazia seu estômago revirar.
“Covardia” , pensou amargamente.
A raiva por ter ficado preso do lado de fora da Sala Comunal na noite do encontro na Torre de Astronomia ainda era recente. Horas batendo no barril errado, encharcado de vinagre, para só no dia seguinte o monitor-chefe anunciar casualmente que a senha rítmica havia sido alterada. Baekhyun deve pensar que eu não fui porque não quis , a dúvida roía seu peito. Deve achar que o estou evitando.
E talvez estivesse. Toda vez que via Baekhyun, cercado de pessoas que gravitavam ao seu redor, Chanyeol se sentia pequeno, insignificante. Como poderia se inserir naquele mundo brilhante? “ Kyungsoo estaria me chamando de idiota agora” , pensou com um sorriso triste.
Determinado a focar em algo que podia controlar, Chanyeol se levantou abruptamente, pegando sua mochila e os pergaminhos de Poções. O Professor Zhang havia mencionado que alguns musgos raros, perfeitos para o Filtro da Paz, cresciam na sombra das arquibancadas do campo de quadribol.
[...]
O sol da tarde deixava o campo de Quadribol inteiramente dourado. Para Baekhyun, voando em círculos durante um treino obrigatório, a luz era apenas um lembrete irritante de mais um dia desperdiçado. Sua mente não estava no jogo, mas na frustração de semanas de tentativas falhas. Ele repassava cada desencontro: o sorteio na aula de Feitiços , sua própria hesitação na biblioteca, o bilhete para a Torre de Astronomia que resultou em um silêncio esmagador. Sua paciência estava no fim. Seus olhos, por hábito, varriam constantemente os arredores do campo, procurando por uma silhueta alta e desajeitada.
Enquanto isso, Chanyeol caminhava na sombra das arquibancadas. Sua missão era simples: encontrar o tal musgo que o Professor Zhang havia mencionado. Com a mente finalmente focada em uma tarefa que podia controlar, ele ignorou o mundo ao seu redor . O som de um treino de quadribol era familiar e fácil de ignorar; para ele, eram apenas vultos no ar, um barulho distante. Ele não notou os uniformes verdes, não registrou a presença específica do time da Sonserina, e certamente não percebeu que o centro de todas as suas ansiedades estava voando em uma vassoura a menos de alguns metros de distância.
Foi então que o caos irrompeu. Um balaço, ricocheteando de forma errada no bastão de um batedor, quebrou a formação de treino, voando descontroladamente em direção às arquibancadas. Sua trajetória o levaria diretamente a Chanyeol.
Do alto, Baekhyun viu tudo em câmera lenta: o borrão preto furioso, a figura distraída que ele rapidamente recnheceu com a cabeça baixa, a colisão iminente.
— CUIDADO!
O grito desesperado de Baekhyun ecoou, mas Chanyeol, absorto em seus pergaminhos, não reagiu a tempo. Não havia tempo para desviar. Não havia tempo para pensar.
Baekhyun agiu por puro instinto. Com um movimento fluido e desesperado, ele se projetou para fora de sua vassoura. Sem hesitação, ele se jogou no ar, interceptando a trajetória do balaço com o próprio corpo.
O impacto foi brutal, um som seco e terrível que fez todo o campo de treinamento se calar instantaneamente.
Chanyeol finalmente ergueu o olhar, confuso pelo grito, apenas para ver o corpo de Baekhyun desabar no chão como um boneco de pano, inconsciente antes mesmo de tocar a grama.
[...]
O mundo de Chanyeol se resumiu a um túnel de pânico e adrenalina. Ele nunca havia corrido tão rápido. Seus conhecimentos de primeiros socorros, estudados para os N.O.M.s, surgiram em sua mente enquanto ele verificava a respiração de Baekhyun e estabilizava seu corpo. Com a ajuda de outros jogadores, conseguiu levitá-lo cuidadosamente até a enfermaria. Madame Longbottom imediatamente assumiu o controle, ao mesmo tempo que elogiava as ações rápidas de Chanyeol, dizendo que provavelmente haviam impedido um dano pior.
Três horas depois, Chanyeol permanecia sentado na cadeira ao lado da cama, recusando-se a sair. Suas roupas estavam manchadas com uma mistura de terra e sangue, mas ele não se importava.
Quando Baekhyun finalmente abriu os olhos, a primeira coisa que viu foi o rosto preocupado de Chanyeol, iluminado pela luz suave da enfermaria.
— Não foi a melhor forma de conseguirmos um tempo, né? — Baekhyun murmurou, a voz rouca, mas conseguindo esboçar um sorriso fraco.
— Você quase morreu, idiota — Chanyeol respondeu, sua voz tremendo de emoção reprimida. — Isso não é engraçado.
Baekhyun tentou se sentar, fazendo uma careta de dor.
— Você está bem? O balaço não te acertou?
— Se EU estou bem? — Chanyeol o encarou, incrédulo. — Você se jogou na frente de um Balaço! Teve três costelas rachadas e uma concussão!
— Mas você está bem. — Baekhyun repetiu suavemente, como se isso fosse a única coisa que importava. Um pequeno sorriso cansado brincou em seus lábios, e pela primeira vez, ele não sentia nenhum nervosismo perto de Chanyeol, apenas um alívio quente e profundo. — Então valeu a pena.
Chanyeol sentiu um nó se formar em sua garganta. Ele balançou a cabeça, sem palavras para responder àquela lógica absurda. Em vez disso, seu lado prático assumiu o controle.
— Não se mexa — disse ele, a voz firme, mas gentil. — Madame Longbottom disse que suas costelas precisam de repouso absoluto. Fique quieto.
Ele se levantou e pegou um copo d'água, ajudando Baekhyun a dar um gole. O gesto era cuidadoso. Chanyeol olhou para o rosto pálido de Baekhyun, para os hematomas que começavam a aparecer, e uma clareza fria e focada tomou conta dele. Era o instinto que lia nos livros sobre Medibruxaria. O paciente era a única coisa que importava. E Baekhyun era seu paciente agora. O resto — a festa, o beijo, seus pais — era apenas ruído de fundo.
— Você não precisava ter ficado — murmurou Baekhyun, recostando-se nos travesseiros, os olhos nunca deixando o rosto de Chanyeol.
— Depois do que você fez? Claro que precisava — respondeu Chanyeol, ajeitando o cobertor sobre ele.
— Bom — Baekhyun sorriu, um sorriso genuíno e sonolento. — Porque eu não queria que você fosse a lugar nenhum.
O coração de Chanyeol falhou uma batida com a simplicidade da confissão. Ele se sentou novamente, sentindo o rosto esquentar.
— Madame Longbottom te deu uma poção Wiggenweld e uma poção da paz. Elas vão fazer efeito logo. Tente dormir.
Baekhyun o observou por um longo momento, os olhos começando a ficar pesados novamente.
— Ok... — sua voz era um sussurro sonolento. — Mas você... você vai estar aqui quando eu acordar?
A pergunta era vulnerável, despida de toda a arrogância sonserina. Chanyeol sentiu seu coração apertar.
— Eu não vou a lugar nenhum — prometeu ele, a voz baixa e firme.
Baekhyun deu um último sorriso satisfeito antes de seus olhos se fecharem. E Chanyeol ficou ali, velando por ele, sentindo o peso das últimas semanas finalmente se dissipar, substituído por um sentimento novo e assustadoramente simples: ele precisava cuidar de Byun Baekhyun. A ideia não o apavorava. Pelo contrário, parecia a coisa mais certa do mundo.
[...]
O ar da enfermaria tinha um cheiro estéril de poções e lençóis engomados que Baekhyun já não suportava mais. Por isso, foi com um alívio imenso que ouviu Madame Longbottom anunciar sua alta. Impaciente para se livrar do cheiro e da dor remanescente, ele terminava de se vestir quando as vozes familiares de Jongdae e Minseok ecoaram pela enfermaria vazia.
— Finalmente, o herói está livre — anunciou Jongdae, com um sorriso maroto. — Quase achamos que você ia instalar uma cama permanente aqui.
— Foi por pouco. Só passamos rapidinho ontem e hoje — completou Minseok, se acomodando na beirada de uma cama vazia. — O alvoroço na porta era tanto que até a Madame Longbottom brigou. Os monitores tentaram dispersar a galera, e até o Professor Zhang deu uma passada para acalmar os ânimos. Nada funcionou.
Baekhyun franziu a testa.
— Alvoroço? Do que vocês estão falando?
Jongdae riu.
— Suas fãs, Baek. Um enxame delas. Choramingando, querendo entrar, assustando todos que tentavam visitar o grande herói Byun Baekhyun. Foi um espetáculo patético.
— Foi, até seu lufano favorito aparecer. — Minseok pegou a história, os olhos brilhando de diversão. — Chanyeol chegou com uma cara séria que eu nunca vi. Parou na frente delas, todo altão, e disse, numa voz tão baixa e firme que até nós nos arrepiamos: “Da próxima vez que eu vier buscar o Baekhyun, não quero ver nenhuma de vocês aqui. Ou vão descobrir que a minha paciência é bem mais curta que a dele.”
Baekhyun parou de se arrumar, a imagem clara em sua mente. Seu estômago deu uma volta doce.
— Ele... ele disse isso?
— Disse e sumiu dentro da enfermaria como se nada tivesse acontecido — confirmou Jongdae. — As garotas ficaram paralisadas. Foi glorioso.
Um sorriso largo e maravilhado estampou no rosto de Baekhyun.
— Ele é incrível.
Jongdae e Minseok fizeram sons de nojo simultâneos, fingindo engasgar.
— Por Merlin, Baek, guarda esse olhar apaixonado para quando ele estiver aqui — disse Jongdae, revirando os olhos.
— Vocês são uns hipócritas — Baekhyun acusou, apontando o dedo para os dois. A verdade é que o time de quadribol da Sonserina tinha até um bolão de apostas sobre quando os dois iriam finalmente se assumir.
O trio conversou mais um pouco, mas Minseok e Jongdae saíram na frente. Baekhyun foi deixado para trás e se despediu da Madame Longbottom antes de finalmente deixar o local. De frente para a porta, parado um pouco afastado, com as mãos nas costas e uma expressão levemente nervosa, estava Chanyeol.
— A sra.Longbottom me avisou que você ia sair — ele disse, evitando contato visual direto. — Pensei que... você poderia precisar de ajuda para carregar suas coisas. — Ele gesticulou para a pequena bolsa com os pertences do sonserino.
Baekhyun sentiu seu coração acelerar. A desculpa era perfeita.
— Ah, sim. Obrigado, Chanyeol. As costelas ainda doem um pouco.
Ele entregou a bolsa e Chanyeol a pegou como se fosse um artefato frágil. Caminharam lado a lado em um silêncio inicialmente constrangedor, mas confortável.
— Ouvi um boato — Baekhyun começou, seu tom de voz dramático e provocador. — Dizem que um certo aluno da Lufa-Lufa aterrorizou um grupo de admiradoras inocentes na porta da enfermaria. Que comportamento tão agressivo para alguém tão bondoso.
Chanyeol corou instantaneamente, olhando para os pés.
— Aqueles seus amigos fofoqueiros — murmurou, lembrando que a dupla tinha presenciado esse momento na noite anterior. — Elas não eram 'inocentes'. Estavam atrapalhando sua recuperação.
— Meu herói — Baekhyun cantarolou, satisfeito ao ver as orelhas de Chanyeol ficarem vermelhas.
— Pare com isso — Chanyeol resmungou, mas um pequeno sorriso teimou em aparecer em seus lábios.
E assim uma nova rotina se estabeleceu. Chanyeol tornou-se a sombra oficial de Baekhyun. Ele carregava seus livros, cortava ingredientes nas aulas de Poções, caminhava lado a lado nos corredores. Baekhyun fazia graça, reclamava das restrições, mas secretamente adorava a atenção
As pessoas comentavam, é claro. Sussurros os seguiam pelos corredores. Chanyeol, no entanto, sustentava-se na narrativa de que estava apenas pagando uma dívida de vida, cuidando de quem o salvou. Era uma desculpa que funcionava até para ele mesmo.
Duas semanas antes do Halloween, Baekhyun já não precisava mais de ajuda para carregar seus livros. A desculpa oficial de Chanyeol para estar constantemente ao seu lado estava se esvaindo, e o pânico silencioso de perder aquela proximidade recém-conquistada o fez sugerir, de forma um tanto desajeitada, sessões de estudo para os N.I.E.M.s.
A biblioteca tornou-se o lugar deles. Longe dos olhares curiosos, a conversa fluía para águas mais profundas. Baekhyun, mais à vontade do que nunca, os entretinha com imitações teatrais de seus pais. Ele encenou a carta recebida de seus pais após o acidente, engrossando a voz: "Apenas um Byun teria a elegância de quase morrer dramaticamente..." — ele parou ali, um rubor sutil em suas bochechas, decidindo omitir a parte que vinha a seguir: "...para salvar seu amado."
Chanyeol ria, uma risada genuína e rara que fazia o peito de Baekhyun se aquecer. Em troca, o lufano oferecia fragmentos de sua própria vida, evitando cuidadosamente o tópico de sua família, mas falando com uma saudade palpável de Kyungsoo e do silêncio opressor de seu dormitório agora vazio.
Foi numa dessas noites, enquanto o único som era o virar de páginas, que a coragem de Chanyeol finalmente venceu sua hesitação. Ele parou de folhear seu livro, o silêncio se estendendo.
— Baekhyun... — sua voz saiu mais baixa que o normal — sobre aquele dia...
O olhar de Baekhyun se ergueu do pergaminho, a surpresa dando lugar a uma compreensão instantânea. Ele viu a seriedade no rosto de Chanyeol, o peso da pergunta não dita, e seu coração deu um salto.
Agora? Aqui?
Não.
A confissão que ele planejava precisava de mais do que a luz empoeirada da biblioteca.
Ele ofereceu um sorriso suave, mas seus olhos eram sérios.
— Eu quero e vou te contar. Tudo. Mas não aqui, não no meio de um dever. Eu... preciso fazer isso direito. Você pode esperar só mais um pouco?
Chanyeol o observou, vendo a sinceridade no pedido. A decepção que sentiu foi breve, rapidamente substituída por um calor de confiança. Baekhyun não estava o dispensando; estava pedindo paciência. E por ele, Chanyeol podia esperar. Ele apenas assentiu, e o momento passou, mas deixou para trás a certeza de que a amizade deles havia se tornado algo mais sólido, mais profundo.
[...]
Foi alguns dias depois, ao buscar um livro escondido na seção de Feitiços Avançados, que Baekhyun ouviu vozes familiares. Ele reconheceu o tom fofoqueiro de alguns colegas.
— ... aposto cinco galeões que o Byun convida a Davies, da Corvinal. Ela é bonita e popular.
— Bobagem. Depois de todo o drama, ele vai querer alguém que não dê trabalho. Alguém... conveniente — Baekhyun já ia se revelar, entediado, quando ouviu o próximo comentário.
— Ele está passando muito tempo com aquele lufano... o grandão, do intercâmbio que não deu certo.
Risadas sarcásticas ecoaram.
— Park? Sério? Um ninguém nascido-trouxa? Ah, por favor, ele provavelmente está se aproveitando da situação para ganhar um pouco do status do Byun. Um parasita social.
Baekhyun cerrou os punhos, a raiva subindo. Mas antes que ele pudesse explodir, uma voz feminina da Grifinória interveio, firme:
— Melhor não se meter nisso. Todo mundo ficou sabendo que aquele “ninguém” botou todo mundo pra correr da enfermaria sem levantar a voz. Ele é com certeza mais do que a gente consegue ver.
Foi a deixa que Baekhyun precisava. Ele saiu de trás da estante com toda a pompa de um Byun, um sorriso afiado no rosto.
— Exato. E não acredito que estou concordando com uma grifinória — disse ele, a voz gelada. O grupo congelou. — Park Chanyeol é mil vezes o bruxo que qualquer um de vocês será. E já que tocaram no assunto do intercâmbio... isso me lembra uma história triste.
Ele se encostou na estante, o tom mudando para uma falsa melancolia.
— Vocês se lembram de Seiji Montrose? Ele também tinha uma opinião muito... vocal sobre o Chanyeol ter perdido a vaga para Mahoutokoro. E então, a coisa mais estranha aconteceu. Uma investigação anônima foi aberta sobre ele, totalmente do nada. Descobriram todo tipo de infração... coisas que ninguém nem sabia que eram proibidas. Foi uma má sorte inacreditável.
Ele olhou para o teto, como se estivesse se lembrando de um detalhe trágico.
— A última vez que soube, ele foi transferido para aquele instituto em Gales. Um lugar para... acalmar os ânimos. Uma carreira tão promissora, jogada fora por... azar. — Ele finalmente baixou o olhar para o grupo, o sorriso sumindo, dando lugar a uma expressão fria. — Parece que o azar persegue as pessoas que falam mal do Chanyeol. Eu tomaria muito cuidado no lugar de vocês.
Ele se endireitou, ajeitando as vestes.
— Park Chanyeol não é "conveniente". Ele é uma escolha. A minha escolha. E eu não tolero que falem mal do que é meu.
Ele deu meia-volta, deixando o grupo em estado de choque absoluto, seu coração batendo forte não de raiva, mas de uma excitação resoluta. A conversa idiota lhe dera a clareza perfeita.
Era hora de convidar Chanyeol para a festa de Halloween.
[...]
O final de tarde no pátio era tranquilo, um dos poucos momentos de paz que Chanyeol conseguia encontrar entre os estudos e a agitação constante de Hogwarts. Ele caminhava de volta à sala comunal da Lufa-Lufa, os braços carregados de pesados volumes encadernados, a mente absorta em revisar mentalmente as propriedades das poções mais complexas.
Foi então que uma voz familiar cortou o ar, fazendo-o erguer os olhos instantaneamente.
— Chanyeol!
Era Baekhyun. Parado sob a torre do relógio, com a luz dourada do crepúsculo iluminando seus cabelos, ele parecia quase... nervoso. Chanyeol sentiu um sorriso imediato e involuntário surgir em seu rosto.
— Ei. Suas costelas? Tudo bem? — perguntou ele, aproximando-se, sua preocupação habitual com o bem-estar de Baekhyun vindo à tona antes de qualquer outra coisa.
— Quase como novas, obrigado. Olha, eu... — ele pareceu hesitar, e Chanyeol notou um leve brilho de suor em sua testa. O Sonserino parecia genuinamente... apreensivo. — A festa do dia das bruxas é na próxima semana.
Chanyeol assentiu, um pouco confuso com a mudança repentina de assunto. Por que Baekhyun estava tão tenso falando do evento?
— Ah, sim. Todo mundo está falando sobre isso. Você... você vai? Quer dizer, claro que você vai. — Ele sentiu um aperto no peito ao dizer aquilo. É claro que Baekhyun iria. Byun Baekhyun não ia a festas, ele era a atração principal. — Você provavelmente tem uma fila de pessoas para escolher.
— É sobre isso que eu quero falar — Baekhyun forçou as palavras, o coração batendo forte. — Eu não quero escolher ninguém da fila. Eu quero... eu quero que você seja meu par.
O mundo parou.
Por um segundo, Chanyeol ficou absolutamente certo de que tinha ouvido mal. Seu cérebro simplesmente se recusou a processar as palavras. Ele viu a boca de Baekhyun se mover, os sons chegaram aos seus ouvidos, mas o significado... o significado era impossível.
— Eu? — A palavra saiu como um sopro atordoado, um eco de sua própria incredulidade.
— Sim, você — a confirmação de Baekhyun veio firme. — A menos que... você não queira. Tudo bem se não quiser.
Não querer? A ideia era tão absurda que a resposta explodiu dele.
— Não! — O grito saiu alto demais, fazendo-o se encolher, mortificado, as orelhas queimando. — Quero dizer... sim. Sim, eu quero ir com você.
A transformação no rosto de Baekhyun foi deslumbrante. A tensão evaporou, substituída por um sorriso tão amplo e genuíno que pareceu iluminar o pátio.
— Sério?
— Sério — Chanyeol confirmou, retribuindo o sorriso, ainda atordoado. — Eu adoraria.
— Ótimo! Perfeito! Então está combinado! — Baekhyun falou rapidamente, a felicidade o dominando. — Eu... eu preciso ir. Fazer... coisas de monitoria! Te vejo depois!
Um riso incrédulo escapou de seus lábios, um som de pura e simples alegria. Ele balançou a cabeça, pensando no rumo bizarro que sua vida havia tomado. O sexto ano mal estava na metade, e sua vida já havia mudado mais do que em todos os anos anteriores juntos.
[...]
O Salão Principal estava irreconhecível. O teto encantado imitava um céu noturno estrelado, salpicado de morcegos espectrais que pareciam brincar entre as luzes das velas flutuantes. Centenas de abóboras flutuavam, cada uma com expressões diferentes, lançando reflexos laranja-dourados sobre os rostos dos estudantes. O cheiro de torta de abóbora e canela se misturava ao aroma doce de poções efervescentes. Fantasmas dançavam no ar, provocando risadas e alguns sustos leves nos novatos.
Quando a grande porta se abriu, um silêncio momentâneo se espalhou pelas mesas mais próximas. Byun Baekhyun entrou, impecável em suas vestes a rigor, mas não era ele o foco principal dos olhares. Era a pessoa ao seu lado. Park Chanyeol, ereto e ligeiramente nervoso, parecia mais confiante com a mão firme de Baekhyun apoiando suas costas.
Os sussurros começaram imediatamente.
— É ele, o lufano que o Byun salvou...
— Eles vieram juntos?
— Ele até que é bonito quando não está escondido atrás de livros...
Baekhyun sentiu Chanyeol enrijecer ao seu lado com o peso dos olhares e sussurros. Sem hesitar, ele colocou uma mão firme na parte inferior das costas de Chanyeol, um gesto protetor que pareceu criar uma barreira invisível ao redor deles.
— Ignore-os — murmurou Baekhyun, a voz apenas para Chanyeol. — Eles são apenas ruído de fundo.
Ele olhou para o rosto pálido de Chanyeol e viu a sobrecarga em seus olhos. O plano inicial de fingir um pouco de normalidade, talvez sentar com seus amigos e conversar um tanto, evaporou. A única coisa que importava era tirar Chanyeol daquele mar de curiosidade. A culpa em seu estômago era um peso frio, e ele sabia que não conseguiria se confessar no meio daquele barulho.
— Sabe de uma coisa? — ele se inclinou, o tom conspiratório. — Cansei da festa. Vamos dar uma volta.
Sem esperar por uma resposta, ele guiou Chanyeol suavemente através da multidão, na direção de uma varanda lateral que ele conhecia bem, um refúgio escuro e tranquilo com vista para os jardins iluminados por lanternas.
Lá fora, o som da festa era um zumbido distante, e a única luz vinha das estrelas e das abóboras distantes. A solidão do local era um contraste gritante com o caos do Salão Principal.
— Chanyeol, eu preciso... eu preciso te contar a verdade — começou Baekhyun, a voz tensa, agora que não havia mais para onde fugir. — Sobre tudo.
Chanyeol se virou para ele, o corpo inteiro focado, esperando. Baekhyun engoliu em seco, forçando-se a manter o olhar de Chanyeol, embora cada instinto lhe dissesse para fugir.
— A razão pela qual eu te beijei no lago,a razão de tudo, na verdade... é porque eu sou completamente, desesperadamente louco por você.
Ele desviou o olhar por um momento. As palavras agora saindo em uma torrente apressada.
— Eu gosto de você desde o terceiro ano. Desde o dia em que eu, brilhante como sempre, consegui te acertar com um polvo na aula de Transfiguração… e ele grudou no seu rosto. — Um sorriso breve, quase envergonhado, atravessou seus lábios. — E, em vez de se irritar ou me amaldiçoar, você gargalhou. Gargalhou como se fosse a coisa mais engraçada do mundo. Foi naquele instante que meu coração decidiu se rebelar contra mim.
Ele voltou a encarar Chanyeol, a voz agora mais urgente, cheia de uma sinceridade crua.
— E foi por isso que eu fui à sua casa nas férias. Eu precisava te dizer que aquele beijo significou tudo para mim. Que eu não me aproveitei da sua vulnerabilidade, que não foi por pena. Mas… eu vi como sua família te tratou. E eu perdi a cabeça.
A culpa escorria em cada palavra, corroendo a firmeza da confissão.
— O caos na festa… foi culpa minha. LiuBai seguia minhas ordens, e a minha raiva estragou tudo. Eu nunca quis que você fosse castigado ou humilhado por causa deles. Eu sinto muito, Chanyeol. Por tudo.
Ele terminou, o peito ofegante, o silêncio da varanda amplificando cada batida de seu coração aterrorizado. Ele ficou ali, exposto, esperando a raiva, a decepção, a rejeição.
Chanyeol permaneceu em silêncio por um longo momento, o olhar fixo no rosto ansioso de Baekhyun, processando a torrente de informações. Lentamente, como se movido por uma força que não controlava, ele deu um passo à frente, diminuindo a distância entre eles.
— Sobre a festa... — começou Chanyeol, a voz incrivelmente calma. — Eu sei, Baekhyun.
Baekhyun piscou, a confusão substituindo o medo.
— Como?
— A carta do Ministério. A cópia que a Professora McGonagall me entregou — explicou Chanyeol. — Nossos nomes estavam nela. Juntos. Eu soube que você estava envolvido desde o momento em que li.
A mente de Baekhyun girou. A carta de advertência, era tão óbvio.
— Então... todo esse tempo... — gaguejou ele, incrédulo.
— Eu sabia — confirmou Chanyeol, dando mais um passo, quase imperceptível. — E esperei você me contar. Mas... o resto... — Ele o olhou com uma admiração genuína. — O que você disse sobre o terceiro ano... a aula de Transfiguração, com o polvo? Você se lembra disso?
Baekhyun apenas assentiu.
— É a minha lembrança favorita.
Um quebra-cabeça que intrigava Chanyeol há anos de repente se montou em sua mente. Os olhares nos corredores, a proteção silenciosa, o beijo no lago ... nada daquilo havia sido aleatório.
— Eu passei semanas achando que eu não era bom o suficiente — ele admitiu, a voz baixa e incrédula, quase como se estivesse rindo de si mesmo. — Que você era... demais pra mim.
Ele balançou a cabeça, o quebra-cabeça finalmente se encaixando.
— Mas não é sobre isso, não é? Nunca foi. O fato de você... gostar de mim... por tanto tempo...
Ele parou, tentando encontrar a palavra certa, mas nada parecia suficiente para encapsular a enormidade da revelação. A escolha, a sensação de finalmente ser visto.
Então, como não conseguia expressar por palavras, Chanyeol decidiu mostrar.
Ele fechou o espaço restante entre eles em um único passo. Uma de suas mãos subiu para a nuca de Baekhyun, os dedos se enredando nos cabelos macios com uma posse gentil que fez o sonserino prender a respiração. E o beijou.
Para Baekhyun, foi um choque elétrico. Um segundo ele estava se preparando para a rejeição, e no seguinte, a boca de Chanyeol estava na sua, firme e cheia de uma certeza que o deixou sem ar. Um som surpreso morreu em sua garganta, e suas mãos, antes pendendo inúteis ao lado do corpo, voaram para se agarrar à frente das vestes de Chanyeol, como se precisasse se segurar para não cair.
Este beijo não era como o primeiro. Não havia a hesitação tímida ou o sal das lágrimas. Era uma resposta. Uma afirmação. Era Chanyeol dizendo tudo o que não conseguia articular: " Eu entendo. Eu sinto o mesmo. Eu escolho você. " Ele derramou todo seu alívio e a esperança recém-descoberta no beijo, afundando-se na sensação de finalmente estar em casa.
Baekhyun derreteu contra ele, respondendo com uma avidez que guardara por anos, a ansiedade se transformando em pura adoração. O beijo se aprofundou, tornando-se uma conversa sem palavras, uma promessa silenciosa trocada no ar frio da noite, com o som distante da festa servindo como trilha sonora.
Quando finalmente se afastaram, ambos estavam ofegantes, as testas coladas uma na outra. A luz distante das abóboras dançava nos olhos escuros de Baekhyun, que agora brilhavam com lágrimas, mas desta vez, eram de pura felicidade.
— Ok... — sussurrou Baekhyun, um riso trêmulo escapando de seus lábios. — Isso foi...
Chanyeol sorriu, a confiança recém-descoberta brilhando em seu rosto. — Achei que seria mais eficiente que palavras.
Foi nesse momento de paz perfeita que a bolha deles foi invadida. Do corredor, uma onda de aplausos exagerados, assobios e gritos de "FINALMENTE!" ecoou pela varanda. Baekhyun nem precisou olhar; ele reconheceu o tom provocador de Jongdae e Minseok, claramente se divertindo às custas dele.
O barulho, no entanto, atraiu a atenção indesejada. Um grupo de garotas de várias casas se aglomerou perto das colunas, olhando descaradamente para eles. Seus olhos estavam fixos em Baekhyun, cheios daquela admiração possessiva que ele sempre atraía. Uma delas até ousou acenar, ignorando completamente Chanyeol.
Um sentimento estranho e primitivo borbulhou no peito de Chanyeol. Era possessividade. Sua mão, que ainda repousava na cintura de Baekhyun, apertou-se quase imperceptivelmente.
— Só porque minha casa é conhecida por ser bondosa e paciente — ele murmurou, a voz um rosnado baixo que só Baekhyun podia ouvir, surpreendentemente ameaçador —, não significa que eu não saiba lançar uma boa azaração. Se elas não tirarem os olhos de você, talvez eu precise… de cobaias para o feitiço.
Baekhyun se virou para olhá-lo, os olhos arregalados de surpresa. Por um segundo, ele ficou pasmo. E então, uma risada maravilhada e incrédula explodiu de seus lábios, um som tão livre que fez o coração de Chanyeol acelerar novamente.
— Park Chanyeol — disse ele, ofegante, um sorriso deslumbrante no rosto. — Isso é ciúme? — Ele se aproximou, baixando a voz para um sussurro cúmplice. — Você com ciúmes é a minha nova coisa favorita no mundo.
Chanyeol corou, mas não negou, um pequeno sorriso malicioso surgindo em seus lábios.
— Não se preocupe, querido — Baekhyun tocou o próprio distintivo de monitor escondido no bolso. — Se você azarar alguém por mim, eu juro por Salazar que uso isto aqui para garantir que a vítima receba uma detenção por... perturbar a paz. Uma causa mais do que nobre.
Chanyeol balançou a cabeça, ainda rindo baixinho da audácia dele. O ar entre eles estava leve, cheio de uma promessa silenciosa. Foi essa nova e confortável certeza que fez Baekhyun se sentir seguro o suficiente para revelar a próxima fase de seu plano.
Ele se afastou um passo, assumindo uma expressão mortalmente séria, embora seus olhos ainda brilhassem de alegria.
— Ok. Agora, as regras. Para que isso funcione, precisamos seguir o roteiro.
Chanyeol o olhou, a confusão divertida em seu rosto.
— Roteiro?
— Encontros em Hogsmeade. Passeios no lago. Pelo menos três antes de eu poder te pedir em namoro oficialmente. — Baekhyun enumerou os itens nos dedos, como se estivesse planejando uma estratégia de batalha. — Não quero te assustar.
Chanyeol o encarou, um sentimento de carinho tão intenso que quase doeu. Aquele era o Baekhyun de verdade: o garoto que podia ser ferozmente protetor em um minuto e um planejador romântico e exagerado no seguinte.
— Você se joga na frente de um balaço por mim, mas tem medo de me assustar com um pedido de namoro?
— Prioridades, Park. Prioridades — respondeu Baekhyun, com toda a seriedade que conseguiu reunir, antes de se render e rir junto com ele.
Eles voltaram para a festa de mãos dadas, uma declaração silenciosa para todo o Salão Principal. E, pela primeira vez, os olhares e sussurros que os seguiram não importavam. Eles dançaram desajeitadamente com os fantasmas, roubaram doces das mesas flutuantes e riram até suas barrigas doerem, completamente perdidos um no outro, uma ilha de felicidade no centro de seu próprio universo recém-formado.
[...]
A normalidade havia se tornado a nova rotina de Chanyeol, e era gloriosa. Nas semanas que se seguiram à festa de Halloween, a promessa de Baekhyun de "seguir o roteiro" se materializou em encontros em Hogsmeade e longas caminhadas ao redor do Lago Negro. E, para o horror de alguns sonserinos puristas e a diversão de todos os outros, Baekhyun havia basicamente se mudado para a mesa da Lufa-Lufa durante as refeições.
Foi em uma dessas manhãs, durante o café, que o caos chegou pelo correio.
Uma coruja de aparência particularmente exausta deixou cair um envelope vermelho e fumegante bem ao lado do prato de torradas de Chanyeol. Ele congelou. Baekhyun, sentado ao seu lado, olhou para o envelope e um sorriso de puro deleite se espalhou por seu rosto.
— Oh, isso vai ser bom.
Antes que Chanyeol pudesse tocar no Berrador, ele se abriu sozinho e a voz indignada de Kyungsoo, magicamente amplificada para o volume de um trovão, explodiu pelo Salão Principal.
“PARK CHANYEOL, COMO VOCÊ OUSA NÃO ME CONTAR ANTES QUE ESTÁ DE NAMORICO COM O SENHOR-TODO-POPULAR-SONSERINO-MEGA-GOSTOSO BYUN BAEKHYUN! ACHEI QUE ÉRAMOS AMIGOS, E NÃO É PORQUE EU ESTOU AQUI SENDO ENFEITIÇADO POR AQUELA VEELA MALDITA DO KIM QUE É MOTIVO PARA VOCÊ NÃO TER ESCRITO PARA MIM ANTES. PELOS DEUSES, MELHORE!”
O Berrador se rasgou em pedaços e o silêncio que se seguiu foi absoluto. Garfos pararam a meio caminho da boca. Cada estudante e professor no salão virou a cabeça em sincronia, olhando de um Chanyeol vermelho-beterraba para um Baekhyun que parecia estar se divertindo imensamente.
Lentamente, saboreando o momento, Baekhyun se levantou com um sorriso presunçoso. Ele passou um braço pelos ombros de Chanyeol, puxando-o para perto em um gesto de posse inequívoco.
— Agradeço o anúncio — disse ele, dirigindo-se ao salão como se fosse seu público. — E só para confirmar o que berrador disse: sim, ele é meu. Considerem-no fora do mercado. Permanentemente.
O Salão Principal irrompeu em um pandemônio de sussurros e risadinhas. Chanyeol queria que o chão o engolisse. Seu rosto inteiro queimava de vergonha. Mas por baixo disso, uma onda de calor se espalhou por seu peito. A vermelhidão em suas orelhas não era só de embaraço; era porque ele achou o jeito mandão e possessivo do sonserino a coisa mais sexy que já tinha ouvido.
Baekhyun sentou-se novamente, pegando um pedaço de torrada do prato de Chanyeol como se nada tivesse acontecido.
— Gosto do seu amigo — disse ele, com um sorriso de canto. — Ele sabe causar.
Chanyeol apenas afundou o rosto nas mãos, sorrindo contra as palmas, sentindo-se ao mesmo tempo o garoto mais sortudo e o mais envergonhado de toda Hogwarts.
[...]
O inverno em Hogwarts cobria os campos de um manto branco e silencioso. Enquanto muitos alunos partiam para o conforto de suas casas, Chanyeol se via diante de uma perspectiva que, meses atrás, teria considerado um pesadelo: passar as férias de Natal na mansão da família Byun.
A ansiedade o consumia durante a viagem no trem. Ele, Park Chanyeol, um nascido-trouxa, filho de trouxas que mal compreendiam seu mundo, iria se hospedar no seio de uma das mais antigas, ricas e “supostamente” excêntricas linhagens de sangue-puro. Sua mente invocava imagens de salas escuras e comentários cortantes sobre sua linhagem.
A carruagem parou diante da mansão Byun, um casarão de torres pontiagudas e janelas altas, coberto por trepadeiras escuras que pareciam ter raízes na própria pedra. Lanternas vermelhas de papel balançavam junto das guirlandas natalinas, numa mistura inesperada de festa e mistério.
No portão, dois guerreiros de pedra negra guardavam a entrada. Esculpidos com tamanha perfeição que pareciam respirar, tinham olhos de jade que cintilavam à luz das tochas, e Chanyeol juraria que eles o seguiram quando passou.
A porta principal abriu-se com um rangido profundo, como se a casa protestasse contra qualquer intruso. O frio da noite foi varrido por um calor dourado que escapava de dentro.
Baekhyun, ao seu lado, parecia quase saltitante.
— Pronto? Eles mal podem esperar.
— Eu também mal posso esperar para não ser amaldiçoado — murmurou Chanyeol, meio a sério.
A entrada era ampla e decorada com uma árvore de Natal colossal, cujos galhos eram adornados com bolas de vidro que mostravam miniaturas de cenas de batalhas históricas de quadribol. Fadinhas presas na grinalda da escadaria cantavam em um coral perfeitamente sincronizado, embora o repertório incluísse um hino funerário élfico sombrio entre os clássicos natalinos.
E a primeira coisa que quebrou as expectativas de Chanyeol foi um elfo doméstico. Não era um ser maltrapilho, mas uma figura impecável vestindo um fraquinho minúsculo e uma gravata-borboleta. Suas orelhas grandes ergueram-se com dignidade.
— Bem-vindo ao lar, jovem senhor Baekhyun. Bem-vindo, jovem senhor Park. Os Mestres os aguardam no Salão de Inverno — disse o elfo, com uma voz profundamente grave, fazendo uma curva perfeita.
Enquanto seguiam por corredores sombrios, iluminados por tochas que queimavam com chamas azuis, Chanyeol viu outros elfos. Todos vestiam trajes impecáveis — vestidinhos de veludo, coletes bordados — e executavam suas tarefas com uma serenidade e elegância assustadoras.
No Salão de Inverno, uma sala com estantes altas de livros e uma lareira enorme onde as labaredas dançavam em cores douradas e prateadas, finalmente conheceu os Byun.
Byun Taekros, o patriarca da família, era um homem alto, de presença imponente, bigode perfeitamente aparado e olhos tão inteligentes que pareciam despir a alma num único olhar. O robe de veludo verde-escuro que usava cintilava sob a luz da lareira, e o sorriso que abriu foi caloroso, embora carregasse uma intensidade quase intimidadora.
— Jovem Park! — exclamou, com uma voz robusta que encheu a sala. — Finalmente. Baekhyun já nos ensurdeceu com suas histórias a seu respeito. É uma honra recebê-lo em nossa casa. Espero que aprecie o nosso… caos controlado.
Byun Seorin, por sua vez, era a personificação da elegância. O vestido escuro que usava caía sobre o corpo como seda líquida, e o coque intrincado brilhava com grampos de jade. Aproximou-se com passos graciosos e tomou as mãos de Chanyeol entre as suas, que eram surpreendentemente quentes.
— Ignore-o, ele adora teatralidade — disse ela, rindo com suavidade. — Seja muito bem-vindo, Chanyeol. Estamos genuinamente felizes por você estar aqui.
Foi então que um vultinho surgiu detrás do sofá: uma garotinha de vestido vermelho escuro e sapatos de fivela reluzentes, apertando contra o peito um boneco de duende com uma expressão mal-humorada.
— Baekyeon, querida, pare de atormentar o duende e venha — chamou Taekros, a voz ressoando com afeto. — Conheça nosso convidado de honra. Este é o Chanyeol.
A menina o encarou com olhos escuros e astutos, avaliando-o como se fosse mais velha do que parecia. Aproximou-se devagar e fez sinal para que ele se curvasse. Quando Chanyeol obedeceu, ela sussurrou em seu ouvido, numa voz carregada de segredo:
— O Baekhyun-oppa tem um caderno escondido só com desenhos do seu rosto. Eu vi.
Em seguida, recuou triunfante, como quem concluía uma missão de espionagem. Chanyeol ficou imediatamente vermelho, enquanto Baekhyun congelava, o sorriso habitual substituído por uma máscara de fúria gélida. Seus olhos se estreitaram perigosamente na direção da irmã.
— Byun Baekyeon — disse ele, baixo e cortante, cada sílaba impregnada de gelo. — Nós vamos ter uma conversa séria sobre o conceito de propriedade privada.
A menina apenas mostrou a língua antes de se refugiar atrás da mãe. Taekros, porém, soltou uma gargalhada estrondosa que ecoou pelas paredes do salão.
— Esplêndido! Um segredo revelado e a primeira disputa territorial por causa de afeto! Ah, o drama é delicioso!
[...]
O jantar de Natal na Mansão Byun foi uma experiência deliciosamente estranha e a coisa mais próxima de um verdadeiro lar que Chanyeol já havia sentido. A comida era sublime: um peru que se auto-fatiava e servia os pedaços mais suculentos em seu prato, e um purê de batatas que formava pequenos redemoinhos encantados e mais uma infinidade de pratos jamais vistos, até mesmo nos banquetes e Hogwarts.
A conversa durante o jantar era um espetáculo à parte. Chanyeol se viu alternando entre um debate animado com Taekros sobre as nuances da teoria de feitiços e as risadas que não conseguia conter enquanto Seorin contava histórias embaraçosas da infância de Baekhyun. A mais recente envolvia uma tentativa de Baekhyun de provar que podia falar com o rio nos fundos da propriedade, o que quase resultou em seu sequestro por um Kappa que havia escapado da mala do tio Jung. Ao seu lado, a pequena Baekyeon ria com a boca cheia de pudim, que levitava até ela em uma colher flutuante.
Numa rara pausa na algazarra, enquanto Chanyeol saboreava uma sobremesa que mudava de sabor a cada colherada, ele sentiu o olhar gentil de Seorin sobre ele.
— Você está muito quieto, querido — disse ela, a voz suave, mas cheia de uma percepção aguda. — Está tudo ao seu gosto? Queremos que se sinta em casa.
Chanyeol sentiu-se aquecido pela sinceridade dela. Ele olhou ao redor da mesa, para a genuína confusão no rosto de Baekhyun sobre por que a história do Kappa ainda era engraçada, e para a alegria descarada de Taekros. Era tudo tão... normal, em sua estranheza. Ele respirou fundo, a coragem vindo daquele sentimento de aceitação.
— Está tudo perfeito, Sra. Byun. É justamente isso o que me surpreende — confessou ele, sentindo-se um pouco ousado. — Pela forma como as famílias de sangue-puro são descritas, eu… bem, eu esperava uma recepção diferente. Talvez não tão calorosa. Especialmente considerando que eu sou um nascido-trouxa.
Taekros e Seorin trocaram um olhar cheio de compreensão, seguido por um sorriso quase cúmplice dela.
— Ah, querido Chanyeol. Você está pensando nas famílias certinhas, as que se acham no topo do mundo por puro acidente de nascimento. Elas são… como livros com capas bonitas e páginas em branco. Muito barulho por nada.
O patriarca dos Byun assentiu, erguendo uma sobrancelha de forma expressiva, antes de falar.
— Sangue-puro, por si só, é um conceito tão… limitante. Tão sem imaginação. Qualquer um pode manter uma linhagem. Mas iniciar uma? — Seus olhos brilharam com entusiasmo genuíno. — Isso é verdadeiramente notável. É a magia no seu estado mais puro e potente! A Ministra Granger é a prova viva! Uma força da natureza que surgiu do nada para desafiar e remodelar o sistema! É absolutamente inspirador!
Madame Seorin inclinou-se para ele novamente, sua voz baixa e confidencial, como se compartilhassem um segredo maravilhoso.
— As famílias tradicionais e chatas preocupam-se apenas em preservar. Nós, os Byun, somos tradicionais, mas curiosos. Valorizamos a magia viva, a inovação, o singular. E você, meu querido, é excepcionalmente singular. O primeiro bruxo de sua linhagem! Isso não é uma mancha, é uma medalha de honra.
Chanyeol ficou embasbacado, sentindo o peso de anos de insegurança simplesmente se dissolver. A vida inteira ele se sentira como uma anomalia, uma exceção às regras. Mas ali, naquela sala, diante daquela família excêntrica, sua origem não era uma fraqueza; era sua maior força.
Com o peso de anos de insegurança finalmente retirado de seus ombros, Chanyeol se sentiu mais leve do que nunca. A família se mudou do salão de jantar para a grande sala de estar, onde uma montanha de presentes estava empilhada sob a árvore de Natal de cobras prateadas. A atmosfera era de uma algazarra alegre, com papel de embrulho que se desfazia em pó brilhante e risadas que ecoavam pela sala.
A felicidade foi interrompida de forma brusca. A pequena Baekyeon, que havia ganhado um kit de doces mágicos experimentais, comeu uma goma que deveria mudar de cor, mas que, em vez disso, começou a inchar rapidamente em sua garganta.
O riso da menina parou. Ela levou as mãos ao pescoço, os olhos arregalados em pânico silencioso. Seu rosto começou a adquirir um tom azulado perigoso.
O ar parou.
— Querida! — Serin gritou, o rosto pálido.
— Baekyeon! — Taekros se levantou abruptamente, a voz um trovão de pânico. — LiuBai! Chame o Sr. Oh! Agora!
Mas Chanyeol já estava em movimento. Em um instante, o convidado tímido desapareceu, dando lugar a um profissional calmo e focado.
— Deitem-na de lado, no tapete! — sua voz cortou o pânico, cheia de uma autoridade que ninguém ali jamais ouvira.
Baekhyun, paralisado por um segundo, obedeceu instintivamente, ajudando a deitar a irmã. Chanyeol ajoelhou-se ao lado dela e, com uma calma que contrastava com a súbita tensão, agiu.
— Anapneo — conjurou ele, o feitiço desobstruindo as vias respiratórias da menina com precisão.
Ela ofegou, o ar voltando a seus pulmões, mas seu corpo tremia com espasmos, e sua magia infantil crepitava de forma instável ao seu redor.
— Firmare Internum . O feitiço estabilizador, complexo e muito acima de seu nível escolar, envolveu a pequena Baekyeon em um brilho dourado e suave. As faíscas se extinguiram e seu corpo parou de tremer. Um choro de susto e alívio finalmente veio, alto e saudável.
Meia hora depois, a calma havia retornado. Baekyeon, após ser examinada pelo Medibruxo da família, o Sr. Oh, já dormia tranquilamente no colo de Serin no andar de cima. Chanyeol, Baekhyun e Taekros desceram com o velho bruxo para a biblioteca.
— Eu devo dizer, Sr. Park — começou o Sr. Oh, os olhos experientes brilhando com respeito. — Aquele Firmare Internum foi executado com uma precisão que não vejo desde os meus tempos jovem curandeiro. A reação alérgica estava causando um espasmo mágico. Você impediu um colapso que poderia ter sido grave. Meu neto, Sehun, deveria ter metade da sua seriedade nos estudos.
Taekros, com os olhos marejados de alívio e um orgulho avassalador, colocou uma mão pesada no ombro de Chanyeol.
— Incrível. Simplesmente incrível. — Ele se virou para o médico com um sorriso teatral. — Parece que o senhor pode se aposentar, Sr. Oh. Já temos um médico residente na família! Ele já consertou o Baekhyun de um encontro desastrado com um balaço e agora salvou a herdeira mais nova.
Baekhyun, que observava tudo com admiração, não conseguiu se conter. Ele passou um braço pelos ombros de Chanyeol, o peito estufado de orgulho.
— Estão vendo? Eu não disse que meu namorado era um gênio?
Um silêncio momentâneo e divertido caiu sobre o grupo. Chanyeol corou, virando-se para Baekhyun.
— Que namorado, não lembro de ter recebido um pedido?
O sorriso de Baekhyun não vacilou; tornou-se mais largo, mais predatório.
— Oh, não me entenda mal. A informação está correta, apenas foi... prematuramente divulgada — ele deu uma piscadela para Chanyeol. — Para que seja oficial, o protocolo da família exige uma joia. Vou buscá-la no cofre.
A promessa pairou no ar, mais brilhante e mais quente que qualquer fogo da lareira, deixando Chanyeol com o coração aos pulos e a certeza de que aquela noite ainda estava longe de terminar.
[...]
Já passava da meia-noite. Chanyeol estava sentado na beira da cama, vestindo um pijama de algodão macio que encontrara sobre os lençóis, simples (dentro do que os Byun consideram simples) e confortável. Sua mente repassava os eventos do dia em um loop vertiginoso: a recepção calorosa, o pânico nos olhos de Baekyeon, a sensação da magia de cura fluindo através dele, a mão pesada e orgulhosa de Taekros em seu ombro, e a voz de Baekhyun o chamando de "gênio"... e, mais tarde, de "namorado". Um sorriso bobo teimava em aparecer em seus lábios. Ele estava quase cedendo ao sono, sentindo-se mais em casa do que jamais se sentira, quando ouviu uma batida suave na porta.
A porta se abriu para revelar Baekhyun. Ele também havia trocado de roupa, vestindo um pijama de seda escura sob um luxuoso roupão de veludo em um cinza bem escuro, bordado com as iniciais dele. Ele não entrou completamente, apenas se encostou no batente, um brilho travesso em seus olhos que afastava qualquer cansaço.
Foi nessa quietude que Baekhyun se virou para Chanyeol, os olhos brilhando com uma promessa.
— Venha — sussurrou ele. — Tenho algo para te mostrar.
Guiado pela mão firme de Baekhyun, Chanyeol o seguiu por corredores escuros que ele ainda não havia explorado. As sombras dançavam nas paredes enquanto passavam, e os retratos que os observavam pareciam conter segredos milenares.
O corredor terminava em um pequeno jardim de inverno, iluminado apenas pela lua que brilhava através de um teto de vidro. No centro, uma parede inteira era coberta por vinhas prateadas e vivas, cujas folhas tremulavam suavemente, apesar da ausência de vento. As vinhas se entrelaçavam para formar o brasão da família Byun.
— A Guardiã — disse Baekhyun em voz baixa. — Tão antiga quanto a própria casa. Ela só responde à nossa magia.
Baekhyun estendeu a mão, e em vez de tocar nas vinhas, ele conjurou uma pequena esfera de luz prateada na palma da mão, uma manifestação de sua magia pessoal. Ele ofereceu a luz às vinhas. As plantas pareceram se animar, estendendo-se para a luz e absorvendo-a com um brilho suave. Satisfeitas, as vinhas se afastaram do centro, abrindo-se como uma cortina viva para revelar a passagem escura para o corredor dos retratos.
Assim que passaram pela cortina de vinhas, que se fechou silenciosamente atrás deles com um farfalhar prateado, Chanyeol se viu em um corredor de pedra polida, iluminado por lanternas flutuantes que emitiam uma luz quente. As paredes eram ladeadas por pinturas a óleo de gerações de ancestrais Byun, uma galeria de rostos que contava a história de uma linhagem vasta e poderosa.
Baekhyun parou em frente a um retrato de uma bruxa vestida com um quimono de seda celestial, adornado com flores de cerejeira que pareciam desabrochar e murchar lentamente. Seus olhos brilhavam com a sagacidade de quem conhecia mil segredos.
— Minha bisavó Mei, do ramo japonês da família — apresentou Baekhyun, com um tom de reverência e carinho. — Ela adoraria você. Sempre teve um fraco por talentos inesperados e uma paixão por poções inovadoras.
Alguns quadros estavam vazios, e Baekhyun apontou para um deles com um sorriso maroto.
— O General Jian deveria estar aí. Ele está visitando o retrato da tia-avó Suling no salão de música, provavelmente para discutir, pela centésima vez, quem trapaceou naquela batalha mágica do século XVIII. Ele é notoriamente competitivo.
Ele guiou Chanyeol até o final do corredor, onde estava o maior dos retratos: um bruxo imponente, de feições coreanas e um olhar severo, mas justo. Suas vestes eram de um estilo antigo, bordadas com fios de ouro que pareciam brilhar com luz própria.
— E este é o fundador da nossa casa, Haneul Byun. — Baekhyun apertou a mão de Chanyeol, um gesto que o ancorava no presente, e se dirigiu à pintura com uma clareza que ecoou no corredor silencioso. — Vovô, este é Chanyeol. O meu Chanyeol.
O bruxo no quadro ergueu uma sobrancelha, seus olhos pintados percorrendo Chanyeol da cabeça aos pés com uma intensidade que parecia real. Após um momento que pareceu uma eternidade, ele deu um aceno quase imperceptível. Chanyeol sentiu um arrepio percorrer sua espinha; era a aprovação de séculos de magia, de uma história que agora, de alguma forma, ele fazia parte.
Finalmente, chegaram a uma porta de obsidiana maciça, gravada com runas prateadas que pulsavam com uma luz fraca. O cofre da família.
— O cofre só se abre para o sangue Byun... e para aqueles que um Byun confia com sua alma — disse Baekhyun, a voz séria. Ele pegou a mão de Chanyeol gentilmente. — Eu preciso registrar você. Para que este lugar sempre saiba que você pertence aqui.
De uma pequena reentrância na parede, Baekhyun pegou um delicado estilete de obsidiana. Em vez de usar um feitiço, ele tocou a ponta do estilete no dedo de Chanyeol, e uma única gota de sangue surgiu, sem dor alguma. Ele pressionou o dedo do Lufano contra uma runa específica na porta. A gota de sangue brilhou em um tom dourado e, em vez de ser simplesmente absorvida, a runa pareceu bebê-la, e a luz viajou a partir daquele ponto, tecendo uma teia prateada por toda a porta. Com um zumbido baixo e harmonioso, a porta de obsidiana se abriu.
O interior não era uma caverna de ouro, mas uma grandiosa sala iluminada por uma luz mágica suave. Prateleiras de carvalho escuro guardavam artefatos, livros encadernados em couro de dragão e caixas de joias delicadamente esculpidas. Baekhyun caminhou até uma caixa de veludo preto e a trouxe de volta.
Ele se ajoelhou.
O coração de Chanyeol parou.
— Park Chanyeol — começou Baekhyun, a voz, antes tão cheia de confiança, agora tremia levemente. — Eu sei que meu roteiro é ridículo, e que demorei anos para ter coragem. Desde o dia em que um polvo ficou grudado no seu rosto e você apenas riu, eu soube que não haveria mais ninguém. Mas a única parte que importa é esta. Você me salvou de mim mesmo mais vezes do que pode imaginar, e eu me joguei na frente de um balaço por você, o que, francamente, parece um bom começo. Você quer ser, oficialmente e para que todos os meus ancestrais fofoqueiros saibam, meu namorado?
Dentro da caixa repousava um anel de prata, simples à primeira vista, mas com pequenos diamantes que cintilavam como estrelas contidas. Havia nele uma autoridade silenciosa, elegante, discreta, poderosa, como se prometesse proteção e lealdade sem precisar de palavras.
Lágrimas que Chanyeol não sabia que estava segurando escorreram por seu rosto. O garoto que se sentia uma anomalia em seu próprio mundo estava sendo convidado a se tornar uma parte honrada do legado de outra pessoa. Com a voz embargada pela emoção, ele conseguiu sussurrar a única resposta possível.
— Sim.
Baekhyun deslizou o anel em seu dedo, onde ele se ajustou perfeitamente com um calor suave. Ele se levantou e enxugou as lágrimas de Chanyeol com os polegares, o sorriso em seu rosto era a coisa mais brilhante naquele cofre. Chanyeol olhou para o anel, uma promessa sólida em sua pele.
— É lindo, Baekhyun — disse ele, maravilhado.
— Fico feliz que tenha gostado. É um Anel de Vínculo. Vai aquecer um pouco sempre que eu estiver pensando em você — respondeu Baekhyun, o tom presunçoso voltando à sua voz enquanto o abraçava pela cintura. — Esse é só o de namoro, claro. As alianças do casamento estão em outra parte do cofre. Não queremos misturar as coisas, seria uma bagunça.
Chanyeol riu, um som baixo e genuinamente feliz que ecoou na quietude do cofre. Ele balançou a cabeça, o sorriso alcançando seus olhos ainda brilhantes.
— Você é inacreditável — sussurrou ele, a voz cheia de uma adoração que ele não tentou esconder.
Ele se inclinou e o beijou, e o sorriso ainda estava em seus lábios. Foi diferente dos outros. Não começou com a hesitação do lago ou com a urgência da varanda. Começou com alegria. Foi um toque suave, depois outro, um beijo no canto da boca de Baekhyun que o fez rir baixinho contra os lábios de Chanyeol.
Era um beijo que celebrava. Havia apenas a calma feliz de um futuro que acabara de começar. As mãos de Chanyeol não agarraram, elas acariciaram, traçando a linha da mandíbula de Baekhyun, os dedos sentindo a pulsação suave em seu pescoço. Baekhyun, por sua vez, não o segurou com desespero, mas repousou as mãos suavemente em seus ombros, como se estivesse memorizando a sensação.
O beijo se aprofundou, mas não em paixão, e sim em intimidade. Foi um murmúrio de promessas, uma troca silenciosa de devoção. Era a certeza tranquila de que teriam todos os beijos do mundo a partir daquele momento.
Quando se afastaram, ofegantes, mas sorrindo, permaneceram com as testas coladas. Baekhyun pegou a mão de Chanyeol, passando o polegar sobre os diamantes cravejados no anel.
— Isso fica muito bem em você — disse ele, a voz baixa e satisfeita. Olhou nos olhos de Chanyeol, o brilho presunçoso retornando. — Mas saiba… isso é só o começo da coleção.
Chanyeol riu, sentindo o calor do anel em seu dedo como uma promessa tangível de todas as piadas, todos os beijos e todos os momentos que ainda estavam por vir.
— Então… eu mal posso esperar pelo resto — murmurou, meio envergonhado, meio feliz.
[...]
Nos meses que se seguiram, a união Byun-Park deixou de ser um escândalo para se tornar uma fascinante parte da rotina de Hogwarts. O brilho possessivo nos olhos de Baekhyun sempre que alguém olhava para Chanyeol por tempo demais era uma visão comum, geralmente apaziguada por um Chanyeol que, com uma paciência divertida, o desarmava com beijos discretos no rosto que faziam o sonserino sorrir.
A proteção, no entanto, era mútua e feroz. Quando um aluno ambicioso tentou enfeitiçar Baekhyun com uma Poção do Amor, foi o faro de Chanyeol para ingredientes que identificou a armadilha antes que ela fosse usada. A fúria silenciosa que se seguiu resultou em uma detenção para o lufano (por duelo ilegal nos corredores) e uma visita prolongada do culpado à enfermaria, um incidente que deixou Baekhyun secretamente extasiado de orgulho.
O esforço conjunto deles em sala de aula foi tão notável que, pela primeira vez em toda a história de Hogwarts, Sonserina e Lufa-Lufa terminaram o ano letivo em um empate técnico pela Taça das Casas, um testamento ao poder do casal mais comentado da escola. Foi nesse semestre que também conquistaram suas licenças para aparatar, um passo crucial para a liberdade que buscavam. O sexto ano de Chanyeol em Hogwarts, que começara com desespero, terminou com uma certeza tranquila.
Mas uma última barreira restava.
A rua onde Chanyeol cresceu era um desfile de sucesso material. Casas grandiosas com gramados perfeitos e cercas vivas impecavelmente esculpidas competiam por atenção. O carro escuro e silencioso dos Byun deslizou pela via, seu luxo discreto tornando os carros importados nas garagens vizinhas estranhamente vulgares. A casa dos Park era a maior do quarteirão, uma construção imponente que tentava ser moderna e clássica ao mesmo tempo, mas que para Chanyeol, agora, parecia apenas... vazia. A fachada que antes o intimidava, agora parecia uma casca frágil e pretensiosa.
Dentro do carro, o silêncio parecia um mundo à parte. Ele ajeitou a gola de sua camisa, as mãos suando frio. Baekhyun, sentado ao seu lado, imediatamente pegou uma de suas mãos, entrelaçando seus dedos com uma firmeza que era um bálsamo para sua ansiedade. O gesto era um lembrete sólido de que ele não estava mais sozinho.
— Lembre-se, você não deve nada a eles — sussurrou Lorde Taekros do banco da frente, a voz calma, mas com um fundo de aço. Seus olhos observavam a casa não com admiração, mas com a análise de um predador.
Madame Serin, ao lado dele, apenas assentiu. Seus olhos percorreram a fachada com um desdém contido — não pela falta de dinheiro, mas pela ostentação sem alma, cada detalhe incapaz de esconder a superficialidade da riqueza.
Apreensivo, mas sentindo o apoio da família que o havia escolhido, Chanyeol saiu do carro. O ar parecia o mesmo, mas ele era diferente. Caminhou pelo caminho de pedras perfeitamente alinhadas, subiu os degraus de mármore polido e tocou a campainha.
A porta se abriu com um tranco, e o rosto de sua mãe se contorceu numa máscara instantânea de desprezo.
— O que você está fazendo aqui? — A voz dela silvava, cortante, como sempre. — Achei que tínhamos sido claros sobre não aparecer até o fim do…
A frase morreu em sua garganta. Seus olhos, antes fixos em Chanyeol, se arregalaram, desviando-se para algo atrás dele. Na calçada, o carro parecia um bloco de obsidiana polida, um predador silencioso em meio aos outros veículos. As figuras que saíram dele vestiam roupas de corte e tecido desconhecidos, movendo-se com uma autoridade que tornava a grande casa subitamente pequena, até insignificante.
Madame Serin avançou, não caminhando, mas deslizando sobre a calçada com a graça calculada de uma pantera. Seu olhar percorreu a Sra. Park da cabeça aos pés, como se catalogasse cada falha e vulnerabilidade.
— A presença de Chanyeol aqui é uma cortesia dele, não uma necessidade nossa — disse ela, a voz melodiosa envolvendo as palavras como veludo sobre lâmina. Passou brevemente pelos olhos da Sra. Park antes de inspecionar a entrada da casa. — Honestamente, acreditávamos que ele já não possuía nada de valor neste lugar.
A Sra. Park recuou um passo, involuntariamente, como se tivesse sido atingida. Atrás dela, o Sr. Park surgiu, confusão ainda estampada no rosto, transformando-se rapidamente em intimidação contida. A riqueza do lugar era óbvia, mas a aura de poder emanada pelos visitantes tornou o ar pesado, quase sufocante.
— Quem são vocês? — gaguejou ele. — O que têm a ver com o Chanyeol?
Um sorriso lento e predatório se formou nos lábios de Taekros, que se adiantou para ficar ao lado da esposa.
— Nós somos o que acontece quando vocês falham — respondeu ele, voz perigosamente suave, o sorriso uma afirmação de controle absoluto. Fez uma pausa, deixando a condenação pairar no ar. — Somos a família que o reivindicou. Mas, para simplificar… ‘sogros’ será suficiente. Por enquanto.
A palavra caiu no ar como uma bomba. O choque no rosto dos pais de Chanyeol foi visceral, mas no semblante da Sra. Park, ele se desfez, estilhaçando-se como vidro. No lugar, surgiu uma expressão que Chanyeol conhecia bem: a ganância. Seus olhos, antes cheios de raiva, agora eram afiados e calculistas. Eles cravaram-se na mão de Chanyeol, que Baekhyun ainda segurava.
E lá estava. O brilho prateado, inconfundível e caro, não era apenas uma joia. Era um símbolo. Uma promessa de uma riqueza e de um status que ela jamais poderia sonhar em alcançar, agora brilhando no dedo do filho que ela sempre desprezou.
Chanyeol ergueu o olhar para os pais, a voz baixa mas firme, quase cortante.
— Vou subir para pegar minhas coisas. Não levarei muito tempo.
Enquanto os passos de Chanyeol ecoavam escada acima, o advogado dos Byun, um homem com olhos de um gavião e um terno que parecia costurado com sombras, deu um passo à frente. Ele não apresentou os documentos; ele os colocou sobre a mesa de centro com a finalidade de uma sentença.
— Um acordo de tutela. Irrevogável — sua voz era desprovida de emoção, um instrumento afiado. — Transfere a responsabilidade legal no mundo trouxa e o bem-estar do Sr. Park para a família Byun. Os termos para a sua cooperação são, digamos, generosos. Assinem.
Não foi um pedido. Foi uma ordem. Diante de um poder que eles não podiam compreender, movidos por uma mistura de medo e ganância, os Park assinaram.
Quando Chanyeol desceu, havia uma nova gravidade em sua postura. Sua mochila estava leve em seu ombro e o restante estava encolhido, seguro em seu bolso, um truque casual de uma magia que ele agora empunhava com confiança. Ele não olhou para seus pais. Seus olhos encontraram os de Baekhyun do outro lado da sala, um porto seguro em meio à tempestade de sua vida passada. Ele caminhou em direção a ele, como se já estivesse em casa.
Foi a Sra. Park quem quebrou o silêncio, a voz pingando uma doçura desesperada e falsa, uma última tentativa patética de agradar os novos patronos de seu filho.
— Chanyeol... você não vai se despedir?
Ele parou, mas não se virou imediatamente. Quando o fez, seu rosto estava calmo, mas seus olhos eram frios como o inverno. O garoto ferido que eles haviam criado não existia mais. Em seu lugar, estava um homem que os olhava de cima a baixo, não com raiva, mas com a indiferença devastadora que se reserva a estranhos.
— Despedir? — repetiu ele, a palavra soando absurda em seus lábios. — Nós nos despedimos no dia em que vocês decidiram que eu era uma vergonha. Isto — ele gesticulou vagamente para a sala, para eles, para a vida que estava deixando para trás — é apenas uma formalidade.
Sem dar a eles a dignidade de outra palavra, ele se virou, pegou a mão de Baekhyun, sentindo o calor familiar do anel contra sua pele. Com um último olhar para a casa que nunca fora seu lar, ele girou.
O CRAC da aparatação foi como uma fratura no próprio ar. Para os Park, foi a prova final e aterrorizante de que seu filho havia sido engolido por um mundo que eles nunca poderiam tocar. Em um instante, ele se foi, deixando para trás apenas o vazio.
Eles aterrissaram no hall da Mansão Byun. O ar ali era quente, seguro, preenchido pelo cheiro de magia antiga e de lar. Antes que Chanyeol pudesse sequer respirar, Baekhyun o puxou para um abraço feroz, segurando-o com uma força que dizia tudo.
— Eu estou tão orgulhoso de você — disse ele, a voz abafada contra o ombro de Chanyeol. Ele se afastou, segurando o rosto do lufano entre as mãos, os olhos brilhando com uma intensidade que espelhava a sua. — Acabou. De verdade. Sua única responsabilidade agora é se tornar o melhor curandeiro que este mundo já viu. De todo o resto… não se preocupe com nada. Nós cuidamos de tudo. Cada ação, cada consequência, cada possível problema… está sob nosso controle. Você não precisa mais carregar nada sozinho.
[...]
O balanço suave do Expresso de Hogwarts era um som que Chanyeol agora associava ao conforto de um recomeço. Desta vez, no entanto, era o início do fim. Sentado no compartimento que haviam reivindicado, ele se encostou no ombro de Baekhyun, sentindo o calor familiar que irradiava dele. A paisagem verdejante da Escócia passava pela janela, um borrão de promessas para o último ano.
Enroscada no colo de Chanyeol, Perséfone, uma gata preta de olhos verdes astutos que Baekhyun lhe dera de aniversário, soltou um suspiro satisfeito em seu sono, o ronronar um motor suave e constante.
— Nosso último ano — murmurou Baekhyun, a voz baixa e quase brincalhona. Ele apertou o braço em volta dos ombros de Chanyeol. — Parece surreal. Sem pais nos controlando, sem colegas nos atormentando… só nós dois. E, honestamente, ainda estou me recuperando do interrogatório rigoroso do seu melhor amigo durante as férias.
Chanyeol riu, lembrando-se da semana em que Kyungsoo visitou a Mansão Byun.
— Ele não te interrogou. Ele só estava... garantindo que minhas escolhas românticas não eram completamente desastrosas.
— Garantindo? — Baekhyun bufou, falsamente ofendido, colocando a mão sobre o peito. — Ele fez uma análise completa da minha linhagem, do meu histórico acadêmico e das minhas perspectivas de carreira em menos tempo do que leva para preparar uma Poção Wiggenweld. Se aquilo não foi uma avaliação para aprovação, então Gilderoy Lockhart realmente mereceu aquela Ordem de Merlim.
— Era só zoeira — Chanyeol defendeu o amigo, embora um sorriso culpado brincasse em seus lábios. — Ele só queria ter certeza de que você era bom o suficiente para mim. Ele te aprovou, no final. Disse que você era "excessivamente dramático", mas que suas "intenções pareciam adequadas".
— Que elogio generoso — disse Baekhyun, revirando os olhos, embora Chanyeol percebesse o brilho divertido neles. — Ao menos aproveitou minha presença ilustre para dissecar cada suspiro trocado com o francês. — Ele se inclinou, cúmplice. — O charme do Kim está duelando com a lógica no cérebro teimoso do Doh. E, sinceramente, meu dinheiro está no Veela.
Chanyeol assentiu, o tom ficando mais sério.
— Ele ama tudo na França, a alquimia, a escola... mas o Jongin o deixa confuso. Ele gosta muito dos sentimentos que o Jongin provoca nele, mas tem medo de que seja só o fascínio da criatura, que o Jongin só queira brincar com ele.
— Uma preocupação válida, mas vinda do Kyungsoo, é pura projeção — analisou Baekhyun com precisão. — Ele passou a semana inteira me testando para ter certeza de que eu era sincero com você, porque é exatamente o que ele teme que o Jongin não seja com ele.
Era verdade. Chanyeol suspirou, um som de puro contentamento.
— Ainda bem que você não é tão complicado. Quer dizer, você se jogou na frente de um balaço e planejou uma invasão à minha casa, mas pelo menos não fez joguinhos demais.
Baekhyun riu baixinho, o som vibrando no peito de Chanyeol.
— Jogos são uma perda de tempo quando se sabe o que se quer. — Ele beijou o topo da cabeça de Chanyeol, a voz ficando mais suave. — E eu sempre soube que queria você.
Chanyeol sorriu contra o ombro dele, o coração tranquilo. Ele se aconchegou novamente, acariciando as orelhas de Perséfone. Eles ficaram em silêncio por um tempo, observando as montanhas se aproximando no horizonte. O trem apitou, um som longo e familiar anunciando que eles estavam quase em casa.
E com a paisagem da Escócia passando pela janela, pela primeira vez, o futuro não parecia uma ameaça, mas uma promessa. Uma promessa de N.I.E.M.s, de uma carreira como curandeiro, de apartamentos com lareiras e de visitas à França para, talvez, ajudar um amigo teimoso a aceitar que ele merecia ser feliz. Uma promessa que ele construiria, lado a lado, com o garoto que o havia ensinado que ele não era uma anomalia, mas uma escolha. A sua escolha.
What I would do
(O que eu faria)
What I would say
(O que eu diria)
The lengths I would go
(Até onde eu iria)
To the measures I'd take to be loved
(As medidas que tomaria para ser amado)
Oh, to be loved by
(Oh, ser amado por)
Oh, to be loved by
(Oh, amado por)
Someone who feels, someone who cares
(Alguém que sinta, alguém que se importe)
Someone who's simply there
(Alguém que simplesmente esteja presente)
Oh, to be loved
(Oh, ser amado)
Oh, to be loved by
(Oh, ser amado por)
Oh, to be loved by you
(Oh, ser amado por você)
The End ?
[...]
O entardecer inundava o elegante dormitório em Beauxbatons, refletindo no mármore claro do chão. Enquanto um conjunto de penas se auto-organizam por cor em um estojo e as vestes de seda azul flutuavam para dentro do armário, Do Kyungsoo estava focado no que realmente importava: arrumar seus preciosos livros de alquimia na prateleira.
Tinham acabado de chegar para o início das aulas, e ele se preparava para ir ao salão de jantar. Foi então que sentiu um calor súbito e familiar tomar conta de suas orelhas.
— Minhas orelhas estão quentes... — murmurou para si mesmo, um pequeno sorriso irônico surgindo em seus lábios. — Quem será que está falando de mim...?
Uma presença sutil se materializou atrás dele, um perfume caro de sândalo e magia. Uma voz, rouca e perigosamente próxima ao seu ouvido, sussurrou.
— Não é fofoca, Soo… é só seu corpo reagindo a mim.
A resposta ácida, uma mistura de química e sarcasmo, formou-se instantaneamente na língua de Kyungsoo. Era o costume, o jogo deles. Desde o sexto ano, quando Jongin ficava irritado por seu poder Veela não funcionar com ele, as provocações eram a linguagem deles. Mas, antes que pudesse disparar a réplica, a imagem de Chanyeol, rindo de forma genuína e relaxada ao lado de Baekhyun na Mansão Byun, surgiu em sua mente. A imagem daquela paz, daquela certeza.
E, de repente, Kyungsoo se sentiu cansado. Exausto de lutar, de competir, de analisar cada movimento como se fosse uma ameaça.
A réplica mordaz morreu antes de nascer. Ele respirou fundo, uma rendição silenciosa. Que Jongin brincasse, então. Talvez fosse mais fácil apenas aceitar e deixar doer de uma vez.
Ele se virou, o rosto neutro, e pegou o chapéu pontudo de seu uniforme de cima da cama.
— É melhor se apressar, o jantar será servido em breve — disse ele, a voz calma, e saiu do quarto sem dar a Jongin a satisfação de uma briga.
Jongin ficou parado, o sorriso flertador desaparecendo lentamente, substituído por uma expressão de confusão.
Aquela não foi a reação que ele esperava. Ele tinha passado as férias inteiras percebendo que o que sentia por Kyungsoo era real, e planejando como, neste último ano, iria finalmente convencê-lo disso. A provocação era para ser um começo, um convite para o jogo que eles sempre jogavam, mas Kyungsoo simplesmente... não jogou.
Sozinho no silêncio do quarto, ele observou a porta fechada. Seus olhos, antes de um castanho escuro, lentamente perderam a cor, transformando-se em um cinza luminoso e rodopiante. Era a cor da sua magia Veela, sim, mas agora era também a cor da sua frustração e de um anseio que não sabia mais como comunicar.
Confira mais conteúdos no meu site: https://babbooshka.neocities.org/