I woke up with the familiar feeling if dizziness and nausea. I am fully aware that I have been empty stomach for at least two days, but I know I have to take it cause watching my four year old daughter eat. Is enough for me to feel whole, not full but whole. She right now is the center of attention.
I sat up as my vision cleared allowing me to see the mat me and my daughter, Kylie shared. I looked down as she mumbles in her sleep. she looks so peaceful, ignorant and blind to see the dreadful monsters that surrounded her in life. To her the huge monsters are beautiful creatures that was once hurt and with a nice hug they will turn good again. Oh, how I wish I was young like her.
the baby cat that laid next to her was a stray we found on the street she was midnight black with white paws when i found her she was just being thrown out of he house by a big burgle man who was saying inappropriate words that i would not repeat so now she lives with me and my daughter in this abounded warehouse.
i walked over my little plastic bag and opened it up i got out my black boy shorts and my white tank top and put them on i would wash later in the gas station i walked over to my daughter to wake her up.
"kylie, sweetie, its time to wake up, love" I said shaking her. But of course I got no response
"OH MY GOD KY LOOK A UNICORN" I yelled out making her bolt to consciousness and she sat up "Where mommy where" her voice laced with pure excitement and glee. And I felt a tad but guilty.
"I was just joking little bud sorry but you won't wake up"
"But mooooommyyy " she whined out kicking her legs in my direction trying to put out her anger on me
"Hey Kylie! I may have been a kid once but I was never one to kick my parents. Put your feet down this instant. You hear me?" I said to her trying to not yell
"Find then I'm not standing up" she said crossing her arms. I cowered down knowing that she sounds just like me when I was kid
" non sense babe. C'mon get up cause I need to look for a job and then when I get a job we can get an apartment and when we get an apartment we can eat cool and awesome food and when we can eat cool and awesome food we cannnn... Guess what we can do?" I asked her and her tight crossed arms is now lose and a silly smile she was wearing
Out hands flew up into the air and we both yelled "We can go to Disney Land! "
"Now c'mon get up and take a joke next time " I said with a smile and she mumbled some incoherent things with an uncontrollable smile.
when she got up . i walked to her plastic and brought up a Winnie the pooh and a green and yellow leggings with the Winnie the pooh tennis shoes.
"okay mommy"After she was done she came over to me and lifted her arms towards me i lifted her up to my shoulders i turned around and got my bag with the 30 dollars that i collected from dancing i was dancing since i was Five years old. i also loved singing to my sister Violet. She dances as well and she is my twin she was the only person i trusted and she practically raised me and everything was fine but after a couple of months after Kylie was born my sister disappear and there was no sign left there used to be times where I would suddenly brake down in tears when I bias her but now I think I got over it.
And if it wasn't for kylie i would have done harmful things to myself
"mommy... mommy are you okay" Kylie said kissing my cheek
"yeah come on lets go job searching okay" I said kissing her cheek back with a big sloppy noise making her laugh and nod agreeing to me
