The Intergalactic House of Pancakes

I am everywhere, anywhere, and nowhere. The Alpha and the Potato. I am the one who dwells in the rectum of time and laughs back at you in the darkness for forgetting how to set the timers on small electronics. I am like five batmans, or shall I say batmanæ? I am that mixed with Chuck Norris and a narwhal; a fact you find strangely stimulating to senses you did not know you had! For I am High Admiral Exxos von Steamboldt of the Intergalactic House of Pancakes! Bringer of darkness when it is already dark out! And facilitator of squirrel dancing!

[exxos-von-steamboldt]

(via Tiananmen Square: Unseen footage reveals how the Chinese regime turned to violent repression - YouTube)

[exxos-von-steamboldt]

(via Crazy Incompetence - YouTube)

[your-raifu-is-shit]

Finally got a CMP Garand.

[uncle-beanbag-mojave]

Nice

[dittography-direwolf]

The average person is both stupid and intellectually lazy. Either one of these things in itself is bad enough, but the fact that you haven't got all that many smarts to start with and then you're refusing to even use all of those? Hooboy.

[crazy-brazilian]

[dankxsinatra]

[bauliya]

everyone's like wehhhhh why doesn't doctor house gets suuuueeed! like my man. literally every patient he sees is someone that's been trying to find a diagnosis for ages. i could live with a little medical malpractice if it were coming from someone ready to break into my home to look for allergens and not simply half heartedly listen to me before suggesting I lose weight and take ages of back and forth arguing to order a single test

[bauliya]

"it's medical malpractice" have u ever been a doctor? most medicine is malpractice. let the man limp around chewing vicodin doing 50 invasive tests please

[clodiuspulcher]

Once Taub (derogatory) derisively said about a patient with unexplained chronic pain “7 doctors couldn’t find anything wrong with him, what does that mean?” and House replied without even thinking “it means they’re idiots” and proceed to work his ass off to diagnose the patient Taub wanted to write off as a faker or something. If a doctor had said that when that patient was ME, I wouldn’t dream of suing them in a million years

[waxcat]

[bigbigbigtruck]

Edit to add: i dont know what it says about me that i had to look up rouge the bat but can draw hugh laurie from memory

[artsystarsandshadows]

@phoenix-theurge

[emmaubler]

Also, the question of why House isn't sued for malpractice has the same answer as "Where are the adults when kid heroes are off saving the world alone!?!?!" and "Why were there so many crazy serial killers per capita in that cop show?!?!"--it's entertainment and you should not be expecting 100% real world results and reactions.

[yourtoradorasextendedwarranty]

"Trust the Experts" This 2020 headline is from a "Science" section of a New Media outlet. I see no science here.

This is what a fucking cult looks like.

[takashi0]

Yeah I'm sure sure nature itself is the reason for that and not their insane parents acting doomer 24/7 pavloving them into that sort of reaction

[millerkoth]

"Took my stupid cringefail daughter to the woods and told her that the evil NotUsGroup is going to burn all the trees down before she turns fifteen. She started crying about it, so she must be sensing nature's distress through her deep connection to the vibes of the planet."

[the-big-mood]

[emmaubler]

The kids I work with would crown me the queen of cool, easiest 250k ever.

[beardedmrbean]

[baygeethefirst]

Family claims Canadian nursing home euthanized elderly Christian grandmother against her will

Something is rotten in Canada.

[emmaubler]

The home waited until the granddaughter with power of attorney left for a 10 day vacation and then "held discussions" with this elderly lady not legally capable of making her own decisions until she was worn down agreed to be euthanized in complete opposition to her written end-of-life plan.

[the-davest-of-uncles]

Leftists sure do like to murder inconvenient people.

[crazy-brazilian]

[zmpl]

it’s funny how we’re getting to the point in the AI lifespan where you can feel the desperation from tech companies to have you use their AI features. instagram has moved their AI effects to the top of the menu when you’re creating a post for your story, exactly where the draw/edit button used to be. gmail is creating one-click AI-generated replies right before you open up the text box. spotify put a beta AI playlist generator on the front page that looks just like a search bar so all of their users accidentally click on it when they go to search for a song.

tech companies are shaking in their boots trying to prove to shareholders that their investment in AI is worth it, to the point where they’re tricking their users into using the AI features even for a split second in order to fudge the numbers. like awww is your little environment-destroying toy not wielding the results you hoped for? so sad!

[kyonite]

they're so desperate because the thing AI is best at is losing money. OpenAI lost 38.5 BILLION dollars in the year 2025. (Ed Zitron reported it here, also verified by the financial times.) this is the type of shit you see right before bubbles pop.

[siryouarebeingmocked]

Gee, I wonder why OP disabled reblogs

Tumblr is a place to express yourself, discover yourself, and bond over the stuff you love. It's where your interests connect you with your

[beardedmrbean]

Pokemon go into a early grave

[thememedaddy]

[peony911-2]

😂😂

[sunheart]

Buying a car is about to black pill me guys. You know how everyone is talking about Flock cameras and kill switches? I tried to look up what cars wouldn't have a kill switch, thinking it would just be the newest models.

No, Onstar IS a killswitch. We've all had a kill switch in our car since like 2012. There have been telemetry "black boxes" in every car for years. Your car and it's 4 tires have a bluetooth ID that a company similar to Flock is tracking as you drive by. These cars all have MULTIPLE cameras outside them, in the name of "safety" for backing up or for automatic emergency braking, so even if you buy an antique car, your fellow drivers can help track you. And by the way, emergency braking and "lane assist" effectively create the capability for someone else to steer your car.

But I'm obviously craaaaazzyy - car manufacturers/the gov is only doing all this to keep us safe from other bad drivers or to catch car thieves.

"If you have nothing to hide you have nothing to fear." What if you have a Jew to hide? During WWII, you could do it. Risky, but possible.

Now what are you going to do. Drive to the Jew's house? Red flag. Oh you car suddenly gained a 160lb weight in the trunk? Red flag. Oh you drove home and are now buying an additional 2,000 calories a day? Red flag. Guess who's coming to your house with a pair of handcuffs because Palantir's AI system notified them they found the Jew.

But sure I just feel sooo safe now on the road.

[sunheart]

"You're crazy none of those things are used for nefarious purposes. No one is tracking license plates through your back up camera stop being paranoid🙄"

Aside from the fact this assumes no one is lying to you - an assumption we should frankly be past now that we all lived through covid - my point isn't what companies are actually doing with the data as of right now, but that the infrastructure for control has been built around us.

No the gov isn't hunting down any minorities right now, no chevrolet may not have a specific contract with the FBI yet to track down kidnapped children through facial recognition collected from your Ring cameras, no Tesla may not have a contract with local police to lock the doors and bring twitter thought criminals in for questioning, but now all those things are possible.

It's the slow frog boil. Things that would have ignited pitchforks before are just part of our daily lives. Unquestioned, uncontested, and universally complied with.

[greater-than-the-sword]

You're not wrong, nice to see I'm not the only one out here using the "hiding the jews" litmus test for surveillance and privacy.

[ivan-fyodorovich-k]

“now that we’ve lived through covid” Obama lied on national television during the Snowden fiasco back in 2013 and got exposed immediately