occasionally subtle

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Jules of Nature

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TVSTRANGERTHINGS
todays bird
Claire Keane
art blog(derogatory)
AnasAbdin
styofa doing anything
KIROKAZE
I'd rather be in outer space 🛸

PR's Tumblrdome
trying on a metaphor

titsay

JBB: An Artblog!
RMH
noise dept.
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@eyesclosedsm
“Love is never a transaction, it’s a choice you make with a full heart. When you give someone your care, time, or presence, let it be free of expectations.”
— Gauranga Das.
Fyodor Dostoevsky, 1880 Draft of The Brothers Karamazov
80 members, 88 posts about #citas #frases #frases en español • We celebrate art and those who create it on Tumblr
Pssttt...
Does anyone else love specific characters in their writing more than others, solely because some key aspect of them is based on someone you love deeply in real life?
Like they could be the most random background character, but if some part of them is based on my bestfriend, I can't help but adore them...
If only I could hold eye contact with such eyes...
— Sarah Jean Alexander, from unfathomable small Distance", published in Omega.
Fyodor Dostoevsky, 1880 Draft of The Brothers Karamazov
80 members, 88 posts about #citas #frases #frases en español • We celebrate art and those who create it on Tumblr
There's something profound about reading Dostoevsky; it's as if he's uncovering your deepest secrets.
From The Brothers Karamazov:
Passenger Seat
I think of you every time I listen to Passenger Seat by Death Cab for Cutie.
Not in a ‘romantic’ way,
not even in a ‘I miss you’ way.
More in a ‘nostalgic’ way.
It brings back the feeling of excitement and anxiety.
Mostly anxiety.
I can’t say I loved you because I didn’t.
I don’t think you’d be surprised by that statement.
You offered friendship,
I refused.
Couldn’t shake the feeling of being used.
It was meant to be sincere but felt like an afterthought.
Do I blame you?
Not really.
Although I thought about it everyday.
Didn’t have the heart to shift the blame onto you.
We ended before we started.
In between something and nothing.
Couldn’t really put a label on ‘us’,
but hey isn’t that dating?
The ambiguity,
the guessing,
the stressing.
Believing in nonexistent ties,
only to be cut off at the edge of the cliff.
Overdramatic?
Only slightly.
This is what it all felt like holding your hand.
Excitement and anxiety all at once.
You might’ve crossed my mind once or twice since those times.
I should’ve greeted you with a kinder tone than the one of venom.
I was holding onto that grudge for dear life.
Knowing how easily you threw me over that cliff,
no hesitation,
no remorse.
Not even a simple goodbye.
I guess I did temporarily blame you.
But not anymore.
I let go of the toxicity.
Erased all of my unkind words whenever someone spoke your name.
I eased this whirlpool of anger inside of me.
Nurtured the insecurities so they bloomed into securities.
These were my faults even before you.
We were destined to meet but only for a moment.
A lesson learned in love going from lovers to friends,
friends to enemies,
maybe even frenemies.
So I thank you.
Long overdue I know.
But please know,
it’s as heartfelt as when I first met you.
Mother May I?
My mother used to say she could not see her resemblance in me.
The only connection was the blood running through our veins,
she could only see my father.
I was so deluded.
I believed her to the core.
As a child I tried so hard to find any trace of her in myself.
Spent night after night dissecting every photo of us.
If I could find anything,
anything worth noticing,
it’d close the rift between us.
As I’ve grown, I finally see those fragments of me inside her.
Old photographs showcasing who I could be.
I laugh a little.
Those similarities I spend endless nights looking for are displayed so effortlessly.
The way our eyes light up when we smile
or how our bodies move to the rhythm of the music.
But she could not be bothered.
I don’t think it was intentional,
the way she rejected me like an organ transplant gone wrong.
She only knew how to love the way the trauma taught her.
Somewhere along the line she transformed me from her daughter to confidant.
Chose me to be her anchor the moment I noticed our family dysfunction.
Built a chest inside of my heart so I’d hold her burdens,
her heartache,
her regrets.
Always reminding me I am nothing like her.
I didn’t ask for any of this.
Mother of mine.
My greatest supporter but my worst enemy.
To love and to hate.
And the terrible thing of all that I don’t dare say out loud.
You are killing me softly.
The moon looks different when you’re happy, I hope you see it tonight and know exactly what I mean
RELEASE ME FROM THE BURDEN OF MY BODY
This body, it is sick
Again and again and again and again
And I in turn am sick of it
Which one is it that aches and stabs so
Spiteful, maliciously
Across my hips
Against my gut?
Inside, hiding behind the
Triple stripes
" || | "
Carved into my flesh by growth
In deep magenta, stark against
Pale skin untouched by sunlight
Like vines snaking up from below my belly
Like three vengeful claws
Like some cursed rune
Marking this body as dysfunctional
Developed just to fail
Worse than useless and unwanted
It gnaws at me from within
If these innards will not function
Then I say be rid of them
Rip out my organs
Slip out my bones
Steal my pelvis and ribs alike
Take the inside outside and stitch me up
Make me hollow
What can hurt me now?
JUST TAKE IT ALL OUT
16/04/26
No one knows the silent battles you fought just to be a functioning human today. Be proud of yourself, even if no one else can see why.