S. B. Alexander

Non-practicing intellectual

[ezbee-alexander]

Therapist: “And this Seth Rogen- you say he was laughing like a spider?”

[ezbee-alexander]

[ezbee-alexander]

Whenever I see a Jackson Pollock painting, I feel like I’m being presented with a picture someone else’s toddler drew for me.

We all gather round, clap for the reveal, discuss the importance of creativity, and pretend it doesn’t look like complete shit.

[ezbee-alexander]

Absolum

[ezbee-alexander]

Hardstark

[sometiktoksarevalid]

[cheaphalloweencostume]

the world gets a lot easier when you learn to be wrong without getting pissed or doubling down. saying, ‘you’re right, that makes sense, I was misinformed, thanks for telling me’ instead of going to war over something your ego’s latched onto will save you time, energy, and the embarrassment of sounding like a whiny little bitch

[ezbee-alexander]

Great advice to save for whenever I am wrong about something for the first time.

[ezbee-alexander]

WIP: 2026 vs 2011

[ezbee-alexander]

Orange cats and huskies are the same animal

[ezbee-alexander]

Goha- er, The Great Saiyaman!

[ezbee-alexander]

Majin Buu, but any normal human skin colour

[ezbee-alexander]

Life is easier when you’re kind to people you don’t think deserve it.

[ezbee-alexander]

The prince.

[ezbee-alexander]

When people ask me to draw them, I put their names in the Do Not Draw These People book, which sits on the shelf next to another book titled People Who Asked Me if I Drew That While They Watched Me Draw That.

[ezbee-alexander]

Imagine being the world’s first proctologist and trying to convince people that you *need* to stick your finger up their ass

[ezbee-alexander]

A story about a haunted house liking its new, unaware occupants.

It protects them from home invaders, and the police detectives investigating the mysterious disappearance of said home invaders.

[ezbee-alexander]

When Artemis II returns to Earth, I hope it’s not all apes. I also hope they don’t return as apes themselves. Ideally, no chimps would be involved at all.

I saw some bonobos throwing bones around in front of The Obelisk again.. felt ominous