Tumblr Text Posts

this is a funny text post blog thing i may post photos occaisionally idk but this is intended for texts posts

[amifutami-remade]

what if every time u unzipped your pants it made the skype opening sound effect

[mtfautoandrophile]

I love concrete because it is strong, cheap, and beautiful, just like me.

[t0tally-pers0nal-deactivated201]

Let’s “cuddle” and when I say cuddle I mean aggressively makeout and grab me everywhere

[greetings-deactivated2015-01-23]

do you wanna have sex?

a) please

b) now

c) a + b

[inspiring]

VIRUS GOING AROUND!!!!! SIGNAL BOOST THE SHIT OUT OF THIS!!!!!

if you are on my blog and there’s a button that says “unfollow” in the upper-right corner, DO NOT CLICK IT! it will bring you to a FBI site that will trap your browser and even can access your webcam! it’s very serious and it’s important you do not click it

[abomasnow]

girls are amazing i just watched my friend change 8 times before picking an outfit you girls are so dedicated to looking good i can’t believe there are men out there sitting in their cum stained sweatpants trying to tell you what you’re allowed to wear

[6539milesofloveapart-deactivate]

thank you

[yungbasedblogger]

apparently “bae” means “before anyone else” i always thought it was a ghetto word for “babe”

[000000000000000-1]

[firelorcl]

dermatologists HATE me. everyone hates me. i’m so alone

[rehooam-deactivated20130615]

pimps don’t do homework srry

[burgrs1994-deactivated20151224]

u get teary-eyed when u yawn bc u miss ur bed 

[2mints]

Ahh the sweet smell of being replaced

[loudmouthed-deactivated20140204]

today this girl asked me if we were hiring and we are but i told her we weren’t because right now im the prettiest girl that works here and if she got hired i wouldn’t be anymore

[aquaticwonder]

Are you a piece of art because I’d like to nail you up against a wall

[bruhita-deactivated20190224]

if you step on the back of my shoe and it comes off I will do the same thing to ur head

[panerasexual-deactivated2017100]

*dips your opinion in salsa and eats it*

[everybidenjusthavegoodtime]

a fun thing to do: say “no thanks, i’m a vegetarian” when people hand you their newborn babies