Funny Text Posts @funnytextposts - Tumblr Blog

shavingryansprivates-deactivate

dopenmind

Reblogging this once more because my mom and I legitimately laughed to tears.

idiotlibra

this is my favorite video on the internet

hashtagloveloses

mental health tip: save this video. watch it when you’re sad. it’s the best goddamn thing on the internet

stability

chronyck

jackafz

everyone around me: *gets things done w their life and is making money*

me:

gitananocturna

Me

16bithoe

When you’re on your way home from the club but one of you almost died

kidkendoll-deactivated20240714

The four you the next week

averagefairy

when vinny from jersey shore is more educated on climate change than the actual president

fancy-trashblog-deactivated2024

I did not expect this, but I love it

acakewalkofcrocodiles

😍

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niceshibe

i can be your angle…. or yuor devil

captainkirk94-deactivated201903

Yesterday i lost my glasses. And decided to document my frustration until……… I really wish this was planned, but i gotta admit, I took a big L.

cc-videos

“[defeated tone] So… I have…. lost my glasses. And I’m afraid to leave my bed because I can’t see… and I fear I might step on my glasses. So I’m sitting here with my bee pillow pet… and I don’t know what to do.

I need to get up. I wanna get food. I gotta exfoliate and moisturize, cause my skin looking atrocious right now.

What if… [deep breath] What if I die here, y’all? Would anyone even miss me?Like, really?

I want Enrique Iglesias to come save me. Like, the ceiling opens up and like, he comes down from like, a heavenly cloud with my glasses, and he’s singing. [imitating Enrique Iglesias] ‘Would you dance? If I asked you to dance? I will be your hero baby!’ And I just take my glasses and I’m like ‘Thanks yo! Put a shirt on homie!’

But life, life don’t work… life… [prolonged silence]

[camera zooms in on glasses]

[long silence; light chuckle] Enrique…”

leupagus

This should win an Oscar

dekoi2501post

dangerbooze

OH MY GOD

zionthepansexual

lochnessmonsterofficial

horse-dweller

Me speaking franch

Soccer blue

bajn

on this day one year ago someone sewed a fried egg to a tshirt

catboycrimsonrain

on this day two years ago someone sewed a fried egg to a shirt

cartoon-dog-deactivated20240105

on this day three years ago someone sewed a fried egg to a shirt

keesters-deactivated20180518

on this day four years ago someone sewed a fried egg to a shirt

imwiremother

concept: im in the kitchen cooking our dinner, delicious aromas filling our small but well loved homespace. meanwhile youre playing with our two soft and fluffy dogs in the living room. i smile in anticipation as i hear the doorbell ring and ronald mcdonald comes through the door and plows me right on the dining table.

imwiremother