Fuck everything but, Iām glad you didnāt hold my hand through it, youāre not supposed to! But I still wish I could kill myself to prove a point. I wish I was in more photos. I wish I sought more. But you held the space for me in the crucial moments when I needed it. You didnāt hold my hand through it all. You canāt, I know you canāt. And Iām glad you didnāt. But I still hurt, even though I never asked for anything, even if I try to expect nothing. So why am I aching when I thought I would accept whatever happens? I guess my expectations grew. I thought we were growing on eachother













