Fuck this shit

Sam. She/They. 🍂 Lipstick Aunt. Loud Pansexual. Book fan. Probably drinking wine and chatting with crows. Possibly a fern.

[faernestitch]

[madness-and-gods]

Yes kids, it’s easy.

[curiouslyhigh]

yeah but just imagine an imp or lesser demon who takes pity on a young girl whose life was totally fucked over by overzealous parents, and who was alone because nobody wanted to befriend her.

imagine the demon seeing her crying alone while he’s possessing, like, a neighbor or something, and shambling up in the stiffly-working meat suit and sitting down and asking her what’s wrong. Imagine the little girl being afraid for a moment because people don’t usually walk like that, or talk to her, or ask her what’s wrong, before she just unleashes and lets the floodgates open. The demon is so stricken with grief for this little girl that once he gets over with his possession, he goes in his true form to her and plays whatever game she wants him to play.

Imagine that she’s finally happy and that the demon must go and so while she’s bidding a tearful farewell, the demon teaches her to summon him.

Imagine a little girl with her best friend, the lesser demon.

[karnythia]

Now imagine her summoning him again and again through her life. To hang out. To get advice. Whatever. And one day when she summons him she’s crying. Because something bad happened. She won’t tell him what. She just wants his help to make sure nothing like that can ever happen again. She wants to be strong. He can help her with that so he does. Then she uses that power to become a superhero & he has to explain to higher level demons why she can wield brimstone but hasn’t sold her soul.

[beforeiletbro-deactivated202105]

i really love tumblr sometimes because y’all make something that’s meant to be shitty and awful and horrible such as a demon and turn it into the most humanizing and empathizing piece of shit in the cutest possible way

[tai-korczak]

23 Emotions people feel, but can’t explain

Sonder: The realization that each passerby has a life as vivid and complex as your own.

Opia: The ambiguous intensity of Looking someone in the eye, which can feel simultaneously invasive and vulnerable.

Monachopsis: The subtle but persistent feeling of being out of place.

Énouement: The bittersweetness of having arrived in the future, seeing how things turn out, but not being able to tell your past self.

Vellichor: The strange wistfulness of used bookshops.

Rubatosis: The unsettling awareness of your own heartbeat.

Kenopsia: The eerie, forlorn atmosphere of a place that is usually bustling with people but is now abandoned and quiet.

Mauerbauertraurigkeit: The inexplicable urge to push people away, even close friends who you really like.

Jouska: A hypothetical conversation that you compulsively play out in your head.

Chrysalism: The amniotic tranquility of being indoors during a thunderstorm.

Vemödalen: The frustration of photographic something amazing when thousands of identical photos already exist.

Anecdoche: A conversation in which everyone is talking, but nobody is listening

Ellipsism: A sadness that you’ll never be able to know how history will turn out.

Kuebiko: A state of exhaustion inspired by acts of senseless violence.

Lachesism: The desire to be struck by disaster – to survive a plane crash, or to lose everything in a fire.

Exulansis: The tendency to give up trying to talk about an experience because people are unable to relate to it.

Adronitis: Frustration with how long it takes to get to know someone.

Rückkehrunruhe: The feeling of returning home after an immersive trip only to find it fading rapidly from your awareness.

Nodus Tollens: The realization that the plot of your life doesn’t make sense to you anymore.

Onism: The frustration of being stuck in just one body, that inhabits only one place at a time.

Liberosis: The desire to care less about things.

Altschmerz: Weariness with the same old issues that you’ve always had – the same boring flaws and anxieties that you’ve been gnawing on for years.

Occhiolism: The awareness of the smallness of your perspective.

Source article. Where words came from.

[jellyfishjammin]

The “I am a piece of shit and nobody will ever love me” factoid is actually a statistical error. You are actually are fantastic and infinitely worthy of people’s company.  That person you used to care about, who taught you to hate yourself by abandoning you, is an outlier and should not have been counted

[faernestitch]

I want 100k words of hippie Derek Hale with a bun.

[faernestitch]

When reading a play in English class

Theatre Kid: *acts out whole scene likes they're on the stage* *has character voice* *shows emotion*

Classmate: *monotone voice* *stutters*

[beaft]

i dont want to look “pretty” i want to look otherworldly and vaguely threatening

[delazeur]

Complicated Jurrassic World headcanon that feanorinleatherpants and I have worked up: 

The entire plot is an elaborate sex fantasy of Andy Dwyer and April Ludgate in which Andy is the rugged, savvy raptor wrangler, and April plays the T-Rex that just fucking eats everyone. 

[shotfromguns]

Everything I know about Parks and Rec comes from Tumblr gifsets, but this sounds 100% accurate to me.

[osointricate]

Tips for living alone

Buy a bat (I have my old color guard rifle) or similar. Keep it in your room/near your bed.

Get a lock for your bedroom door.

If you’re moving into a new place, change the locks. Who knows who had a key to your place before you.

Keep your phone/a phone in your room.

Get a weather alert system set up. App, weather call, little weather radio that tells you about major weather events.

Adopt a pet

Wave at your neighbors. Take note of the ones that make you uneasy. Watch out for kids always.

Be nice to your mail person. No matter what.

If you choose to drink/etc alone, unplug your wifi router. You’ll thank me.

Have extra seating. People sit when they visit. Your one comfy chair is great for you. Not so great for you + grandma + ur five cousins, your aunt, and a couple others.

Learn the self-Heimlich

When you take a shower, bring your phone to the bathroom in case you fall your phone is no longer halfway across the house, it’s just on your counter

Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

Idk what else

[thefisherqueen]

If you live in an one-room apartment, put a screen around your bed. It’ll feel less like you visit people, esp. strangers, into your bedroom. Also you’ll feel much safer sleeping in the enclosure. Cook enough for a few meals each time you cook, and freeze the extra food. That way you’ll prevent things from expiring and it’s great when you don’t feel like cooking or have no time or energy for it.

Give a key to someone near you trust, or hid it somewhere few people will look, like up in a tree. Shutting yourself out isn’t nice, esp. not at night. Put something translucent like curtains or stickers for windows where people can walk past or look in. You’ll feel less watched that way.

Put some contant money somewhere in your room. Good to have in case your bag gets lost or stolen. 

Feeling lonely? Remember, online contacts are not less valuable.

[art-is-blind-deactivated2019010]

I would say maybe set reminders for everything too. Taking meds/vitamins, working out, going to sleep, waking up.

[crewdlydrawn-deactivated2022072]

Buy a small fan for white noise at night if you’re the kind (like me) that gets anxious at all the little ambient noises that ANY building can supply in the dark. Don’t watch scary movies in the dark by yourself, with no visitors. NETFLIX, if you can afford it. It’s also useful because you can watch movies / shows with your online buddies at the same time, miles and states and (sometimes even) countries apart.

[tittily]

get an app like safetrek. never walk into allies or empty streets if there is a more populated/well-lit route to your destination. keep emergency contacts in your wallet and a red cross card with your blood type on it in case anything happens. carry a list of medications you’re allergic to, if any. 

walking around with a headset or headphones discourages people from yelling at you on the street, and it’s easier to escape from hasslers. however, it’s pretty advisable to not have anything actually playing so you can be aware of your surroundings. if anything, have it at low volume.

if you get grabbed on the street (this used to happen to me a lot), immediately scream, and the person will usually get startled, giving you time to get away. 

if you feel like you’re in a really bad place, call someone, or even pretend like you’re calling someone. say where you are. act like you’re planning on meeting up with them. be loud about it. make it seem like someone will notice if you go missing, even for a little bit.

also u should look up manufacturer’s coupons like damn i feel like a successful suburban mom every time i walk into cvs and save 2 dollars on my toothbrushes

[littleaimeebaby-deactivated2017]

PSA PSA EVERYBODY NEEDS

[chattermaxunderthesink]

IT’S ALMOST 1:00 AM AND I GOT THE BEST WRONG NUMBER TEXT EVER.

[chattermaxunderthesink]

here, by request of more than one person:

[talesofthestarshipregeneration]

awwwwwwwwwwa

[reneelajolie-deactivated2015100]

I love people.

[80sloveeegalaxy]

This is live af

[gg-so-peachy-deactivated2017061]

Awww yay!

[nevver]

van Gogh, Picasso, Matisse Chagall, Monet, Manet, Kandinsky, Delacroix, Seurat, and Degas. Palettes, Matthias Schaller

[king-in-yellow]

“Aaron Clarey isn’t really a Mad Max fan. This is pretty clear already given that his viral rant about Fury Road doesn’t betray much knowledge of the franchise at all—he doesn’t seem aware that “the director of Fury Road” he reviles is, in fact, George Miller, the director of the entire Mad Max franchise. He calls one of the most iconic Australian cultural exports of all time a “piece of American culture.” He boldly states “No one barks orders to Max!” when, in fact, all three previous Mad Max films feature Max taking orders from someone (Roger Ward’s Captain Fifi in Mad Max, Michael Preston’s Papagallo in The Road Warrior, Tina Turner’s Auntie Entity in Beyond Thunderdome). But the single biggest sign Clarey doesn’t know the first damn thing about what George Miller or Mad Max is his triumphalist line: “When the shit hits the fan, it will be men like Mad Max who will be in charge.” Mad Max isn’t in charge of anything throughout the Mad Max film franchise. Max is emphatically not the archetype of the badass hero who gets the girl, gets the crown, and rules as a patriarch over society as is his due. He’s a fucked-up loner who isn’t fit to live among civilized people; who begins each film alone, wounded, broken, and who ends each film in the same state or worse. […] All the Mad Max films have had tragic endings, and if you don’t grasp that this is the tragedy at the heart of Mad Max (and the gritty Westerns and samurai films Mad Max emulates) then you don’t get Mad Max. If you think Max has an awesome life and we’re supposed to wish we were him, you really don’t get Mad Max.”

—

Arthur Chu, ‘Mad Max’: How Men’s Rights Activists Killed the World

m r a s    j u s t    g o t   f u c k e n   d r a g g e d d d d d d d d 

(via theimprovfairytale)

[akatonbo-old-blog]

It makes me so happy to see the way that Arthur Chu is using his fame. <3

[thatwasasmalltown]

just in case you forgot: taylor swift wrote a song for a little boy who died of cancer who was a fan of hers and read every single post his mother made about him. taylor called her and said “i wrote this song for ronan.” she used the exact words his mother whispered to him every night, used every detail about him from his favorite toys to the color his eyes, then released and performed it and donated every cent to cancer research and treatment and credited his mother as a co-writer because she didn’t want the attention on her but on the woman who lost her child.

[educationandclass]

Yet the media still talks about her love/private life.

[quinn-against-ddlg-deactivated2]

I bought my friend an elephant for their room.

They said “Thank you.”

I said “Don’t mention it.”

[birffed]

[matcha-and-cocoa-deactivated201]

They’re poisoning them early

[snloompy]

Her face is the overall emotion that everyone should be experiencing right now

[vampiregerards]

and kids, please remember

taking your meds is very punk rock

staying hydrated is totally punk rock

eating is extremely punk rock

loving yourself is as punk rock as it gets so please take care

[chiquititaas]

Idk why everyone thinks Slytherins are all evil bc they’re ambitious when in most cases ambition really just leads to shoving a whole pizza in your mouth because some hoe said you couldn’t.

[significationary]

#slytherin is the house of stubbornly completed dares that probably weren’t thought through the whole way