[amorverde]

i dont need a boyfriend i need 12 million dollars and a donut 

[faggot2dope]

I’m really good at keeping secrets because five minutes later I forget what you told me because I don’t care

[evaded]

If you wanna be my lover, please do not get with my friends.

[feat]

is pushing people away considered a special talent because i think i’m really good at it 

[oomshi]

eat my ass

[virgro]

My mom said I had to eat my vegetables first

[oomshi]

I respect that

[raphnarock]

I’m going to assume this has happened to anyone who’s ever cuddled anyone and has a penis.

Source (find the exact comic yourself; at least I linked you to the webpage)

[usbdongle-deactivated20200531]

no, no, dont do this, please, if you are cuddling w/ me your boner is like a compliment and i welcome you to grind that shit into the back of my legs

[moss-and-memory]

same

[freeing-my-mind]

same

[ladydontmind-blog]

if we are spooning and there isn’t a boner pressed into my butt I will assume you don’t actually like me and get really upset

[nylonsubmissive]

Bones next to the butt are nice

[lonexwolves-deactivated20200606]

Butt bones are the best bones.

[frogpuncherzeppeli]

where the women of tumblr make me feel better about having a boner when cuddling

[doritofu]

[k-i-n-d-r-3-d-s-p-i-r-i-t-s-dea]

Basically.

[lavender-ice]

I’m laughing so hard

[reinventamos]

[edanarose-deactivated20150806]

[noortjen-blog]

[stravaganza]

[ratbrick]

CAN’T

[ilovedeers]

OMFG

[animalsnaps]

[so-personal]

my blog will make you horny ;)

[sorran-deactivated20140609]

^ well it didnt so shut ur friggin pie hole

[dumbgay]

hmu if u wanna date a piece of shit

[cuntroversy]

[double-take-deactivated20140811]

[howunpleasant-deactivated201508]

friday at school i heard some girl in the hall way scream “FOR THE LAST TIME BITCH IM LESBIAN IM NOT TRYING TO STEAL YOUR BOYFRIEND HE SMELLS LIKE KETCHUP ANYWAYS”

[notlindsay]

one time i actually thought i had a chance with someone 

[dekutree]

i got 20/20 but i still can’t see my haters

[faggot2dope]

the devil wears prada is a lie, i’m literally just wearing a white tee