woodland dweller

she/her | aroace | satanist | sideblogs: boiledgodling

[brehaaorgana]

Greatest hits of FIFA cultural exchanges thus far:

Learning about flyovers and pyrotechnics at American games being a thing

Non-americans discovering the size of American football stadiums....for high schools in texas. Also the size of our stadiums in general.

Going to baseball games as a side treat! Lmao.

Non-americans losing their minds over "like, 100 petrol pumps," at buc-ees.

Related: Americans often forget how huge target and Walmart is.

People discovering American BBQ

Non-americans being obsessed with mid American restaurant chains like Golden Corral and Taco Bell

A lot of them really did feel god in this chile's apparently

The rightful obsession with waffle house

New understanding of American Big Drink With Ice supremacy as summer creeps in

Begrudging acceptance of mandatory water breaks during games

Americans realizing we have a Team USA and we are not, in fact, just "hosting our friends" from around the world — mostly because we won our first match and our team is decent??? Not amazing but not the worst.

Side rant: us women's football team is legendary good and we should care about that more like. Hello???

Admitting Americans are right about air conditioning

Related: the english team did warm ups in Florida RIP, and also the there's a video of the French team just being like fuck the heat, fuck the sun, this is so hot...

Americans who do not normally care about international football but fucking love a sport and cheering so we're just hyping whatever team is nearby, like we see a party and just show up and learn the chant. Like sorry many of us don't know shit about soccer but if we see a bunch of people in viking helmets or kilts or holding a bunch of flags and cheering we're game.

TAILGATING!!!!

I already said this but American yellow school bus is an international celebrity

The Scottish drank Boston dry of beer apparently, like they quadrupled what Boston normally sells for fourth of July weekend. SAM ADAMS HAD TO GET AN EMERGENCY BEER DELIVERY.

Also the English team fans got kicked out of The Londoner pub in Dallas after drinking 5,000 beers and going over max capacity lmao

Free refill drinks, tortilla chips & salsa.

So many non-americans are going to be here for the 4th of July for our 250th anniversary which is going to be great and hilarious

Non-americans discovering ranch as a beloved condiment

Non-americans understanding American obsession with hamburger now

Japan's homebase is in Texas and the cultural differences are frankly great and also the Japanese fans are SO NICE and helped clean up the stadium after a match???

All the short videos with the eagle screech (which I think is actually a hawk but whatever)

[official-dad-blog]

Like yeah America's government is literally the Legion of Doom, but we generally aren't that bad. I'm glad the world is seeing the little things that there are to love in America.

[lanalangs]

starting to unlock my unbearable personality that arrives every four years for the world cup

[trickstarbrave]

I have been enjoying seeing people experience food this World Cup

[darkestelemental616]

I read this in that one French guy's voice

(Eros, the guy who moved to Texas to start a bakery)

[chelmnik]

yes I’m making imgflip sports memes to post to 0 notes on tumblr. if you think this is cringe you’re actually cringe for not watching the footy

[one-time-i-dreamt]

I was tidying up a room, and right in the middle of it I saw a massive grandfather clock. At some point I noticed it had the AO3 symbol on it, so obviously I decided to take a picture and post it on Tumblr.

Except I accidentally captioned it, “guys check this out, I’ve got the one and only AO3 grandfather cock.”

I realized immediately, but by the time I reblogged it with “CLOCK” in all caps, it was too late. It had already done numbers on this hellsite.

[bloodstainedgauntlet]

whats that kink called that you get from reading too much fantasy lit as a child that makes you want to be tortured in front of someone who loves you so you can see the pleading desperation in their eyes and hear how much they love you in between the cracks of their voice and really truly believe they would do anything to save you. also you get to look so cool and brave and covered in blood and soooo able to withstand pain haha no just me? ok

[the-big-mood]

There’s an Italian semi-pro wrestler who enters the ring dressed like a pizza chef and knocks opponents out by throwing a pizza pie at them.

[pangur-and-grim]

I'm sending him to the glue factory

[strange-aeons]

this is how it is with The Creature

[one-time-i-dreamt]

I was woken up (in the dream) by my girlfriend to the news that our roommate, (who had irl just gone to a mental health ward) had died and was being unethically reincarnated. the text she showed me in the dream was from her friend going "my best friend just DIED. and theyre turning her into a JUJUTSU KAISEN CHARACTER"

it was a deeply serious and horrifying thing, because she was simply getting isekaied into jjk, and presumably wouldnt have any powers or anything.

[one-time-i-dreamt]

[princessgemma12]

If you like the word “queer” reblog.

[incandescent-creativity]

#fun umbrella. we r all sitting under it like the big rainbow thing in elementary school gym class

[gaynfl-moved]

STOP CENSORING YOURSELF ON THIS WEBSITE. FUCK SHIT SEX MURDER ALCOHOL DRUGS FAGGOT DYKE QUEER TRANS BITCH SLUT WHORE SEX SEX SEX SEX!!!!!!!!!!!

[your-sleep-paraylis-demon]

OK OK. UH UHHHH..... KILL?

[gaynfl-moved]

[harvestspriteirl]

[caffedinotte-deactivated2018020]

not to be a nerd but it’s so crazy how he (Bernini) really did that from cold hard stone……. truly a spectacle, truly breathtaking, an honor to behold

[dontgetmadgetmaddie]

I think you should know he was 23 when he finished this and the ass gets a lot of attention but the hand on Persepina’s side/tummy is also exquisite

[assignedfaggatbirth]

before i saw the caption I knew that HAD to be bernini.

I try not to make sweeping statements but I think there’s a case to be made for bernini as the greater sculptor there’s ever been.

here’s his bust of costanza bonarelli

here’s apollo and daphne from the front, where she’s mostly human

from the back, where she’s mostly tree

and details

[bogleech]

this is the one art form I genuinely just cannot get my brain to accept as real. I’ve watched sped-up videos of it being done, read about it, seen in-progress marble statues and I still just can’t get it to sink in or stick. My mind doesn’t want to believe that any person has ever been able to start with a big block and break little bits off of it until it looks like a finely detailed person. At some point it has no recognizable shape and they still know where and how deep they should take a chip out of it that’ll still be the right decision 50,000 fucking chips later?!?

[butteredtoastcrumbs]

The Ecstasy of Saint Teresa has a hidden skylight for gold rays of actual light to shine down on their expressions and clothes and clouds.

[kogiopsis]

Hi yes I have been there and seen all of these IRL and I have some more pictures to share:

Insanely detailed feet with veins from “Aeneas, Anchises, and Ascanius”

Another foot from the same statue because a) he textured underside of the foot and the folds of skin in the arch and b) can you see the light coming through the thin marble between the toes?

One of the mouths of Cerberus from “The Rape of Prosperina”.

Prosperina/Persephone’s facial expression and HAIR TEXTURE

Hades’ hair as well - this man was entirely too good at making CURLS out of ROCK.

A (poorly lit) close-up on the tree textures from “Apollo and Daphne”.

Hand, sling, and rock from “David” which I think deserves to be at LEAST as well-known as Michelangelo’s. Saw them two days apart and I prefer Bernini, honestly.

Facial expression from “David” - I just love the character in this so much.

Kind of a weird angle but look at the texturing on the sling pouch!!!

We also got to see one of Bernini’s earliest works (possibly his very first) in the Uffizi; it’s not currently on display, unfortunately, but look at this:

Forgive the poor photo quality but. He was 14 when he carved this. FOURTEEN.

Man was a straight-up wizard.

In conclusion: if you get the chance to visit the Borghese Gallery in Rome (which has the most Bernini sculptures gathered in one place), do it. The “Ecstasy of St. Theresa” is in a church a short walk away from there, too, and well worth a visit. There are also several more Berninis in churches around Rome which can be visited for free or for a nominal donation! Just… be smarter than we were and make sure you’re not trying to visit them on days they have services.

[tanukipost]

i think the world would be a happier place if we were all permanently stoned

[queercodex]

the lottery by shirley jackson

[tanukipost]

hold on i have to read something real quick

[tanukipost]

dude

[lunlumo]

DO NOT, under any circumstances, hold MEN'S figure skating singles on FRIDAY THE 13TH EVER AGAIN

edit: there's only two in top 10 that didn't fall/trip. yeah

[wintersportism]

[segamascott]

[teaboot]

Imagine being named Bobby McDonald or some shit and then living so long that both “Bobby” and “McDonald” enter the public lexicon as naughty words until you are essentially named “Penis Homosexual” and kids are afraid to write it down

And it could happen to any of us next

[daysleftofsecondterm]

Hang onto this dream to get you through the next 1,070 days

[fairlyghouled]

I miss Yuzuru Hanyu and Shoma Uno so bad guys