anakin skywalker x f!reader
word count; 3,801
warnings; unprotected p in v sex, reader is a sex worker
summary; you haven't been able to get your mind off of the handsome jedi knight since the first night you laid with him. and now he's back, but something seems off...
 The Jedi Knight was coming again.Â
 The other girls grumbled their displeasure and glared her way as she applied her lipstick, rubbing her lips together while she touched up her makeup in the vanity mirror. She paid them no mind howeverâ she knew they were only envious.Â
 Itâs not like she could blame them. Never before had she ever actually looked forward to working with a client, in fact, if you had told her sheâd be this giddy like a young school girl just a month ago, sheâd scoff as if it were the most ridiculous thing sheâd ever heard. No one was just excited to do this kind of work anyways, it was just a way to get by before, a way to keep a roof over her head and food in her belly.Â
 Itâs not like she still wanted this life for herself. Not at all, actually. If it were her choice, sheâd have run away with the handsome Jedi long ago. But she told herself that if this was the only way she could have him, even for a few nights at a time, then it was worth it.Â
 And he was coming back today.Â
 This was only the third time heâll have come to her, the third time in the span of a few months but sheâd been dreaming of this moment since she saw him last. Sheâd practically been on a whole other planet since the last time he left her, she couldnât even bring herself to care when sheâd been called for other clients, didnât even care when the gross Mon Calamari man came in last night.Â
 It would all be meaningless come tonight, when she finally saw him again.Â
 âHow come she gets the actually appealing clients, Lizcar?â Vitta, a Twiâlek asked from the vanity beside her. She rolled her eyes as she touched up the blush on her cheeks, catching a glimpse of their Rodian employer, Lizcar, through her reflection in the mirror.Â
 âIt is not like I choose the girls for them, ho-tah,â Lizcar scoffed as she approached where she sat, eyeing her features through the mirror. She suppressed the urge to grimace when Lizcar approached, the strong scent of Ryll lingered on the Rodianâs breath and clothes. âThe Jedi pays good money,â she said at last after a prolonged moment of silence. âSee to it you are on the best of your behavior tonight, yes, kwa-sah tee?âÂ
 Lizcar reached out with her long, noodle-like fingers to drag them against the underside of her chin and she blinked away her distaste, peering up at her employer through her darkened lashes. âYes, Lizcar,â she replied simply, silently willing her Jedi Knight to hurry up and rescue her from her awfully smelling boss.Â
 Lizcar hummed low as she retracted her fingers, relief washing over her as the Rodian turned and made her way towards the door. âI will come and fetch you when he arrives,â she said before slipping out the door and she watched as it slid closed behind her.Â
 The girls in the room continued their gossip, a mixed jumble of Basic, Huttese, and other languages permeating the room. Vitta, however, slid away from her vanity stool and she watched as the Twiâlek approached out of her periphery, her breath hot as she leaned down to face her reflection in the mirror. The Twiâlekâs seafoam green eyes bore into hers and the cerulean skin of her hand soothed down from her bicep down to the crease of her elbow.Â
 âI wonder what the Jedi Knight sees in a simple girl like you,â Vittaâs voice said in a soft hiss, each syllable laced with a hint of venom. The Twiâlekâs animosity was palpable in her touch and she found herself grimacing, eyelids narrowing as she gazed at the woman beside her. âYou are so plain,â Vitta continued, plucking a strand of hair from behind her back and tossing it before her face, a corner of her purple lips curving in a smirk when she twisted her face in displeasure. âSo basic.â
 âAnd yet, he did not pick you,â she replied in a hiss, turning to glare at the Twiâlek beside her. Vittaâs gaze darkened as she turned to bare her teeth, lip curled in challenge. Just before either could say any more, the door once again slid open for Lizcar to step back inside, calling her name.Â
 âThe Jedi is here for you, mwa-shashi,â she announced and she gave Vitta one last hard look before she rose from her seat, the Twiâlek, too, straightening her posture. With one last look at the blue girl before her, she spat, âhave fun with the Snivvian.â
 And with that, she pushed past Vitta, the thin lace of her long, black cover-up flowing behind her as she followed Lizcar out of the beauty room and into the foyer. The Jedi Knight was not there, however, and she turned to face Lizcar quizzically.Â
 âHe has already gone up to your room,â she stated as she circled around the front desk, bending down to reach for a bottle she had tucked away out of sight. âSeemed very worked up. Wouldnât doubt that you have your work cut out for you tonight.â
 She couldnât help but feel the corners of her lips twitch at this as she made her way to the staircase, practically skipping every other step just to ensure she could reach her room faster. She could feel her heart lurch as it beat in her throat when she approached the door of her bedroom, willing herself to breathe and relax as she pressed the button on the panel beside it, the door sliding open.Â
 The room was dimly-lit, illuminated solely by the setla lamp in the corner. A tall, dark figure stood with their back turned to where she stood and her heart skipped a couple of beats as the door slid closed behind her. The Jedi Knight still did not turn and she did her best to keep her composure, although it was proven difficult when she knew how good he could make her feel.Â
 âYouâre back,â she managed at last, speaking through a lump of saliva that had formed at the base of her throat. The Jedi Knight hummed as she cautiously approached, her fingers wary as they traced the line of his elbow through his thick, dark robes. She circled around until at last, his side of his face came into view, the thin scar that fell in a line down the end of his eyebrow, the plush of his pink lips that pressed themselves together in a firm, thin line.Â
 This was hardly the first time sheâd ever seen him but still, the sight of him never failed to take her breath away. It was truly devastating how beautiful he was, like a fallen angel who just so happened to stumble into their galaxy. He was simply unreal, for a human especially.Â
 âIâve missed you,â she whispered, finding his gaze beneath the darkness casted on them by his lids. His eyes were like endless pools of deep blue, like the murkiest waters of Kamino. There was something darker in them now, however, something she couldnât quite place. Something was troubling him, it didnât take a Jedi to sense it. Lizcar appeared to be rightâ she did have her work cut out for her. âSomething ails you⌠are you alright?â
 The Jedi Knightâ whom she didnât have a name for, for either of their safetyâs sakeâ let his eyelids fluttered closed, his chest heaving as he drew in a deep breath. Her brow furrowed as she watched him, as the arm she had been gently gripping onto moved, his other handâ his mechanical handâ wrapped around her wrist, dragging it up to his face. She gasped when her knuckles connected with the warm flesh of his cheek, when she flexed her fingers and could feel just how soft his lips were.Â
 âIâve missed you too,â he said at last, turning his lips into the skin of her hand and she shuddered when he placed a kiss there. His fingertips pressed into her wrist and she pressed her lips together as he placed a kiss to her knuckles, another to the tips of her middle and forefinger, trailing his mouth down to her wrist.Â
 Goosebumps erupted over the expanse of her skin as he worked his kisses down her arm, using her arm to pull her into him as his lips reached her shoulder, trailing from her collarbone, up her neck, to her chin where he peppered kisses along the expanse of her jaw. He nuzzled his nose against the underside of her jaw just beneath her ear and breathed her in, as if heâd been craving her just as much as she him.Â
 âIâve missed the way you smell,â he said and she gasped when he kissed the lobe of her ear, his teeth gently nibbling on the soft skin there. âIâve missed your skin. The way it feels. The way you feel.â
 She whimpered when he trailed his kisses back down her jaw until they reached the center of her throat, pressing the most delicate of kisses there. Then, his mouth made its ascent back up her chin until it reached hers, their lips touching but not quite. She was shuddering, her lips quivering against his in anticipation.Â
 The Jedi Knight let his eyelids open and she, too, looked at him, his gaze so dark she swore sheâd be reduced to a puddle at their feet any moment now. Locks of dark blonde hair fell over his eyes and she resisted the urge to reach up and swipe it away just as his lips parted once more.Â
 âThe noises you make whenever I so much as touch you.â
 Heat flared from her chest and fell down in a line to her center, warmth swirling and wetness pooling in the thin panties she wore. The Jedi Knight pressed his lips harder into hers, sealing them in a kiss. Her knees began to wobble and she swore sheâd be a puddle of magma at their feet had his hands not been there to support her.Â
 Her fingers clutched at his shoulders as his tongue swirled inside the expanse of her mouth, and it didnât take much for him to have full control over hers. She mewled into his mouth, leaning into him for more until he pulled away, either of their chests heaving as they chased air back into their lungs. Cold bit into her skin as he removed himself altogether from her and she fought back a whimper as he removed the outer layer of his robes, dark gaze never once leaving hers.Â
 âIâve been from planet to planet nonstop since the last time I saw you,â he said in a low murmur as she lowered herself on the bed, slowly removing the lacy black cover-up she wore, the thin shoulder straps sliding down her shoulders. The Jedi Knight was down to just his pants, pulling the shirt he wore beneath all of his robes up over his head and letting it drop to the floor. âIâve been to many beautiful places and met many new people yet, all I could ever think about was you.â
 She flushed at the confession as she unhooked her bra, tossing it aside so that she laid bare for him, save for the black lace panties she wore. The Jedi Knightâs deep blue gaze wandered over the canvas of her body as he approached, hovering over her, his fingers woven through her hair as he shook his head down at her.Â
 âI donât know what you have done to me,â he murmured. âBut I cannot get enough of you.â
 He pressed his lips to hers again and she was putty in the palms of his hands, so eager for more of him that she didnât know what to do with herself. His kisses ventured past her mouth, past her face, past her throat until they reached the valley between her breasts, his breath hot as it fanned over her skin.Â
 âWhat have you done to me?â He whispered before turning to ravage one of her breasts, his tongue swirling over the peaked bud, her lips parting in a gasp as her chest heaved closer into his mouth. He removed his lips from one bud only to venture over to the other, truly not letting a single part of her body untouched. Her fingers wove themselves through the messy locks of his hair and she could just make out the dark gaze he was giving her through hooded lids, tossing her head back into the pillows behind her when he pulled away.
 His kisses traveled down her belly until they reached the hem of her panties, pressing his lips against the lacy material. âI couldnât stop touching myself at night thinking about how good you feel when you are wrapped around me,â his voice spoke in a low husk and she mewled as his fingers curled around the hem of her underwear, tugging them down her legs agonizingly slow.Â
 âPlease,â she gasped when he finally ripped her panties away from her body altogether, feeling his breath as it approached her arousal. She squirmed beneath his gaze, wiggling her hips, desperate to have him closer. The Jedi Knight simply watched and she swore she could feel the intensity of his gaze on her pussy, on the slick that was surely dripping down her slit. âI need⌠please.â
 He glanced up at her through the dark of his eyes, slowly lowering himself closer to her throbbing heat, his lips but a mere whisper away from her sensitive bud. Her hips bucked, or rather, they tried to anyway before an invisible force held them down, away from him. Her eyelids snapped open and she peered down at him, his hands on the mattress beside her body.Â
 He was using the Force on her.Â
 âPatience,â he tittered and he was so close to her, she could feel the half crescent shape of his lips against her heat. âI plan to take my time with you. To rid you of the memories of the nights between when I last saw you.â
 She was a mess and he hadnât even touched her yet. She struggled against the Force, desperate for any sort of friction she could gather. It was no use, however. He was too strong and she huffed, deflating in defeat.Â
 The Jedi Knight chuckled at her realization that she was defeated, lowering his head until his lips could place the softest of kisses against her clit. She gasped at the abruptness of his kiss, her chest heaving in anticipation as he kissed her again and again and again. The Force pried her legs open and his arms hooked beneath her thighs, tugging her in even closer.Â
 His tongue flattened against her entrance and she hissed through her teeth as he licked one, agonizingly slow stripe up her slit, flicking his tongue against the underside of her clit in the process. Sweat already began to bead on her hairline and oh, how she ached for more. She wasnât sure whether she wanted his tongue or his fingers or his cock inside of herâ all she wanted was him as close as possible.Â
 âPlease!â She mewled as he teased her tongue at her entrance, as if playing with his meal. The Jedi Knight chuckled, âsuch manners.â
 And then she was done for.Â
 He buried his tongue inside of her, so deep that she wasnât sure it was impossible for a tongue to be able to reach that deep inside of her. She was a shining, writhing mess as he ravished her pussy, practically shoveling her orgasm out of her with his tongue. Her hand reached for his curls again, tugging at his scalp, to which she earned herself a hum of approval, the vibration sending her even further down the tunnel of bliss.Â
 The Force was back on her hips the second she began to buck them again, holding her down and ensuring he wouldnât let a single drop of her release go to waste when she finally let go. Tears stung the outskirts of her eyelids as she came and she swore she could see the entire galaxy when he worked her through her orgasm with his tongue, lapping every last drop she had to offer up.Â
 When he pulled away, she cried out, wanting more, needing him on her again. The Jedi Knightâs lips and chin glistened with her slick and he chuckled at how desperate she was as he pulled away to tug his pants down his legs, finally letting his cock spring free of its restraints. Even through the blur of her tears, she could make out just how big he was, could already feel her mouth begin to water at the sight.Â
 âPlease,â she murmured as he approached like an eclipse, casting a shadow over her. He was so big that all she could see was him, all she even cared to see was him. It was times like this she wished she had a name to put to his face, that she had a name that she could call out to, to moan. He was her beautiful stranger, her beautiful enigma she wished she could know everything about.Â
 âYouâre so⌠desperate,â he sighed as he hovered over her, pressing his lips onto hers for a brief kiss. âThe most gorgeous thing Iâve ever laid eyes on.â
 Once again, the Jedi Knight was able to steal the breath from her lungs, to leave her speechless. She sighed as he kissed her again, as his hard length prod against her thigh before against her entrance, gasped when the girthy head broke past the barrier between her folds.Â
 She tensed and cried when he pushed just an inch further in and he shushed her, kissing the tears away from her face. âRelax,â he cooed, waiting until she eased before pressing himself further inside of her. Still, he wasnât all the way in but still, she felt so full.Â
 âYouâre so⌠hngh!â She cried when he snapped his hips further to sheathe the rest of himself inside of her, her nails etching crescents into the flesh of his shoulders. The Jedi Knight kissed her just below her eye again, pressing kisses all the way down to the shell of her ear.Â
 âCall me by my name,â his whisper curled around her ear and she fluttered her eyes open, just making out the darkness of his stare through her watercolor vision. âBut⌠but Iââ
 âAnakin.â
 She gasped when he pulled out almost all the way just to snap his hips back into her again, feeling full to the brim with him yet again. Anakin. He had a name and felt like he trusted her enough to share it with her. Something sacred fell between them, like a thread had been sown between their souls to bridge them together.Â
 She now knew his name.Â
 âAnakin,â she breathed when he kissed her again, pulling away so that he could grip the headboard of the bed with his mechanical hand, his other grabbing a fistful of her hip. He cursed when she said his name for the first time, using the headboard as leverage to buck his hips into her again, harder each time.Â
 âSay it again,â he groaned, fucking into her so hard that the bed was shaking, his grip on the headboard not enough to keep it from etching dents into the wall.Â
 âAnaâŚ! Anakin!â She yowled as his tip bruised her cervix over and over and fucking over again. White hot bliss scorched her skin, Anakin had taken over every single one of her senses until all she could think about was him. He was a parasite, infecting every sense of her being until she couldnât think straight anymore.Â
 She wasnât quite sure she cared.Â
 âAnakin!â She screamed again as she pulsed around him, squeezing his cock so tight that he cursed and fell until his lips were against her neck, sucking marks into her skin. She was so close to the edge, so close to succumbing to the bliss that she almost didnât quite hear him.Â
 âRun away with me.â
 She blinked, his pace never once stopping despite her own world coming to a screeching halt. Surely she didnât hear him right?
 âWhâ what?â She managed to ask through the murky slime of her mind, trying to make sense of what she just heard. Anakin lifted his head from the crook of her neck until their gazes could crash into one another again, much like a supernova. She mewled when his hips slowed but still, the feeling of him inside of her stayed.Â
 âYou heard me,â Anakin drawled, his mechanical hand woven through her tresses while the other caressed her cheek with the pad of his thumb. âI know you hate it here. So leave with me.â
 She was at a loss for words, her mouth opening and closing but nothing could come out. She wasnât sure what to sayâ was this not what she had been daydreaming about only hours before?
 Still, a tiny voice in the back of her mind told her this was just a joke, that he couldnât have been serious. Yet, when she stared deeper into his dark blue gaze, she wasnât convinced that he was just jesting.Â
 âBut where⌠IâŚâ
 âDonât worry about that,â he shook his head, cupping her cheek in his palm. âLet me get you out of here. I canât stand to be without you and⌠and I know youâre not happy here and IâŚâ
 She couldnât believe what she was hearing. She leaned forward, lifting her head until their lips were connected, stealing his breath away this time.Â
 âYes,â she breathed against his mouth once they had broken their kiss. âTake me away with you.â
 Anakin smiled, white teeth peeking from the cracks of his lips. He bucked his hips into her again and she gasped, clutching the bedsheets as he grabbed either of her hips, fucking into her at such an animalistic pace, she wasnât quite certain how she would even manage to run away with him if she couldnât walk.Â
 âGonna be all mine,â he murmured beneath his breath as he pushed her towards that edge once again. In the back of her mind, she could only imagine the rampage Lizcar would go on in the morning when she realized her top girl was gone. She could imagine the look on Vitta and the other girlsâ faces when they all realized who she mustâve left with.Â
 And she smiled up at Anakin just as either of their orgasms washed over them.Â
a/n; so uh happy Easter!! đ not sure if this is the most appropriate thing to post on Easter but you know....
anyways, me?? posting two days in a row??? (do not get used to it LMAO)
â ď¸ +18 MDNI, Stripper!Eddie, shyness towards men, nervousness, self-esteem issues, fluff of some sort, self doubt, flirting, soft touches, skin on skin contact, kissing, kissing with tongue, pining, Stripper!Billy and Stripper!Steve at the end.
Plot: You thought you were cursed with your shyness, but after one embarrassing night, you decide it's time to change, and you believe someone might be able to help with that.
Summary: You get to know Eddie in a more intimate way, and he helps you with something you didn't think he would agree to. But friends always help eachother.
A/N: Can't even begin to describe how happy you guys made me with all of your reblogs and boosting this story in ways I didn't think could be done! Welcome to all new followers, to all new readers and thank you for your support!
You can always support me by hitting the reblog button with tags, and I always enjoy reading your comments!
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PART 4
You ran out of coffee. Thatâs the first thing you noticed this morning as you got up and wanted your shot of caffeine. The fact you would have to go out to go get a cup of coffee before starting your day at work, was already making you whine with exasperation.Â
You had a coffee machine at home because you always liked some nice, steamy, cup of coffee as soon as you woke up, but, you forgot to get it last time you went grocery shopping, swearing you had some, knowing you had some, so your best guess was that Robin snuck in and took it, forgetting to tell you.
You both have copies of your keys, because thatâs the one lucky thing of having a friend in the same complex. If something seems out of the ordinary, or something happens at all, you could always go and check on eachother. It was safe, and you both liked feeling safe by one another.
But there were times where Robin would sneak in while you were out or something, or even sleeping, and she would get stuff she doesnât have. You could go do that to her as well, but she probably used it all by now, so it was no use. You know Robinâs got a sweet stash at her home, so you always invade her property to steal some Reeses or some Musketeers.Â
You looked at yourself in the mirror, wearing your Pikachu PJs and groaned, knowing you had to change out of the comfy clothes to get into restraining ones. You looked at the clock, 8:10. You had fifty minutes before you got into work, so you moved quickly to get dressed, with the new clothes you got during last week.Â
After that meeting with Eddie and his friends, youâve been shopping during the week, sometimes with Robin, sometimes by yourself, and you actually quite liked picking up clothes that no one could judge in the changing room but you and you only. Youâve gotten blouses, tank tops, a lot of colors, skirts, even shorts you felt comfortable in.
But you also bought something you never thought you would buy. A black piece of lingerie. Seeing it against your body, made you feel powerful, there was the obvious insecurity at the back of your throat and your mind, trying to tell you that you would not use it, that you donât need it, that you donât even look like the mannequin where it was displayed.
But you still felt that power. And you wanted it. So you got it. As well as a black stiletto dress, some heels, some accessories. Yes, your credit card bill will be something next month, but it was the first time you shopped, pushing so many negative thoughts away, listening to your gut only.Â
So, right now, you put on some pair of jeans and a pink blouse over you, throwing on your white sneakers as well, since it was just a trip to the coffee shop that was two blocks away from your apartment complex. You grabbed your purse, threw your cell phone in there and off you went, walking into the morning sun and the soft summer breeze hitting your skin as you walked.
The days were getting hotter, and you were happy to have A/C in your apartment and mostly in your room, because that would have been agonizing. You could see people in suits walking to get the bus, or going straight to their workplace, and of course the old ladies that took their morning walks with their little dogs.
You reached the coffee shop, small, but it served coffee. You never came here, always opting to go to starbucks or another shop, because here, in this particular shop, there was alwaysâ
âHello! What can I get for you?â Your eyes finally focused on the pair of green ones in front of you. A small knot appeared in your belly, as the nerves vacated in your throat, looking at the guy in front of you. He had black hair, and a bright smile on his face, the apron of the shop sitting on his waist.Â
You licked your lips as you felt your fingertips warming up, as well as your ears, looking up at the menu as your brain started working once more. You scanned your options and took a deep breath in, pushing yourself to look down towards the guyâs eyes once again.Â
âI would like a medium coffee, with half creamer in it please.â You respond to him, no shakiness in your voice, no stuttering, you didnât even think of the words, or process anything, you just talked. And he was a handsome young man, probably beginning his 20âs, but his eyes were sharp green, yet, you didnât feel like running away.
âSure thing! To go?â Was his next question and you wanted to nod, because it didnât require for you to speak really, but you still did, just to prove yourself, just to feel prouder and feel your chest gleam with victory.
âYes, please.â You grabbed your purse and found your hands steady, a little bit of coldness at the tip of your fingers, but nothing like before. Nothing like you would have acted before. You grabbed your wallet and took out the money, and you looked at the bill in your hand and the counter. You raised your head up again, and put the money in front of you for him to take from your hand.
He smiled and grabbed the bill from the other end, and you felt yourself blush slightly as you saw he was about to give you change.
âKeep it.â It wasnât much, but this had made your day insanely better, by a mile, and it didnât even start yet. The sun was up, yes, but it was too early in the morning. The guy smiled at you again, giving you a nod.
âThank you lovely.â Oh, a pet name. Your heart picked up a pace as you smiled back at him, and his back finally turned, letting you exhale a shaky breath out of your lips. Your stomach was knotting, but you kept your gaze up, hand on the counter as you waited for him to finish your coffee. There was a part of you that wanted to run away, but because you didnât know what to take of that pet name. Eddie says them all the time, so itâs nothing special, right? Itâs just a way of calling someone.
He turned around with your coffee in hand, and slid it over to you with a smile to his face, which you returned, despite feeling your neck burning from nervousness, and you grabbed your cup, putting the strap of your purse over your shoulder. You cleared your throat slightly and pushed your limits once again.
âHave a good day.â You say to him and he gives you a small chuckle and a nod.
âYou too Miss!â And that was that. You turned around and walked out of the door, with a small ding as you opened it. You were wide eyed, a huge grin on your face as you walked, trying to keep your excitement inside. A month ago, you wouldnât have done that, there was no way you would have done something like that! You looked at him, straight in the eye and even held a conversation! Tipped him!Â
You were panting heavily as you finally reached your complex, looking at the time on your phone as you headed to Robinâs apartment. You had 20 minutes before logging into work, and you couldnât wait. You couldnât contain it inside yourself. You fumbled with the keys on her lock, and rushed inside, pushing the door closed with your foot and dropping everything, the cup of coffee and your purse on Robinâs table.
You rushed towards her room, already hearing the intense snoring your friend has, and you opened her door to see her hugging her pillow, while drooling all over it, one leg over the comforter as she slept on her side. You bit your lip as you tiptoed to her right side, and then lightly shook her shoulder.
âRobin⌠RobsâŚâ You tried waking her up and all you got was a soft snore and a grunt.
â5 more minutes and Iâll get ready momâŚâ You giggled under your breath and shook her harder.
âRobin, wake up, I have to tell you something!â You exclaimed a little louder this time, and that made her head prop up from her pillow, doing a slurping sound as she put her spit back in her mouth, her hair almost looking like a nest.
âWhat the fuck are you doing? Itsââ She double tapped the phone on her nightstand and looked at the time through half lidded eyes. âAlmost 9 AM! I work at 10 and I wake up ten minutes before logging in.â She grunted out to you and you were still smiling widely and shaking her shoulder.
âBut I need to tell you something! Look what I got!â You rushed outside the room to go grab the forgotten cup of coffee and then rushed back towards Robinâs room to see her sitting up, rubbing her eyes while yawning. You showed her your cup and she just looked at you as if you were completely insane.
âYou got⌠Coffee?â And her eyes slightly widened as she rubbed her eyes with her fingers, pinching them as frustration hit her. âI took the last of your coffee, shit, forgot to tell you.â
âRobin, no! I got it from the coffee shop two blocks down!â You tried again and she just looked at you with a confused look on her face.
âI donât know why you woke me up for, but I do not appreciate itââ
âThe barista was a guy!âÂ
And Robin sat there, looking at you, blinking slowly as your news sank in. She knew about the guy at that coffee shop, she buys her coffee there, while you drive around to look for Female baristas, but now you bought coffee from the same place she does. It was a family business and the guy is the son of the owner.Â
âYou bought coffeeâŚâ
âYes.â
âFrom the barista, who is a man.â
âYes, and I said thank you, tipped him, gave the money in his hand and even wished him a good day without driving my eyes away.â You puffed out your chest as you took a sip of your coffee which was now cold, making you wince in disgust.Â
Robin slowly started smiling widely at you and she plopped herself onto the bed again with a cheer, excitement blooming in her chest for you, because this now offered you possibilities, chances, and it opened so many doors for you, the possibility of thousands of paths you could take.
âHoly shit! GOD BLESS STRIPPERS!â She yelled out loud which made you choke on the coffee you were sipping, and then trying to shush her through your coughs.
âRobin, shut up!â You laughed as you placed your cup on her night table, sitting next to her as she just stared at the ceiling with a wild look on her face.
âThis is huge! Like, now you can talk to strangers! Like, complete strangers without knowing their name! This is a big step!â She giggled as she looked up at you and you were smiling, feeling your cheeks heat up slightly because of how proud you felt of yourself.Â
âHe even called me Lovely, and I didnât flinch! I blushed of course, but I stood my ground.â You tell her, and she sat up, pinching your cheek tightly.
âI am so proud of youâŚâ And you knew she meant it as you pushed her away from the assault on your cheek, rubbing it afterwards as you laughed at her, but Robinâs smile faded slightly as she looked down at her hands. âWhat about the other girls? When will you tell them that youâre doing this?â She asked and yes, you have been keeping this a secret therapy from the other girls in the group, but because you wanted to surprise them, and you also felt too much pressure on yourself if many people knew about this.Â
âWhen I get a date⌠I will tell them. I just feel like I have to make them proud if I do tell them, like I will force myself to move rapidly and not at my own pace.â You try to explain and gladly Robin understood, giving you a nod. Her smile returned but in the shape of a smirk as she scooted closer to you.
âYou gonna tell Eddie?â You looked at her and you felt a burning happening on your ears, and you felt a cold sweat going from the bottom of your neck and running towards your chest. âYou still going to his house after work?â Your eyes widened as you jumped up from the bed.
âWORK!â You rushed out of the bedroom, leaving a laughing Robin trying to catch her breath on her bed. Of course, she couldnât go back to sleep from the excitement now, and the fact that you would be going to Eddieâs later on was making even more excited.
Because she wasnât invited this time.
You fixed your half ponytail again as you stood in front of Eddieâs apartment door. You chose a different outfit now, jeans, wide leg this time, and a tight crop top white T-shirt, that covers your belly button of course. You had some bunky white sneakers on your feet, and you had done some eyeliner, mascara, and covered a few marks on your face that were here and there.Â
The butterflies in your stomach were going wild as you waited for him, hearing the thumping coming closer to the door. Fridays were Eddieâs day off, so it would be just the two of you in his apartment. You doubted on saying yes to this when he invited you over, but you two were friends, it was something normal to do. So why are you still nervous?
The door opened and you looked up to see Eddie smiling down at you and his eyes widened slightly as he looked at you.
âAll this for me?â He motioned towards your outfit and you couldnât help the small smile that came up to your lips as well as a blush spreading on your cheeks, not expecting his praise. He opened his arms for you, raising his eyebrow up, hiding behind his fringe, his hair in a high bun, with some strands falling on his face.
You saw the black shirt, tightening on his chest and biceps as he opened his arms. The guitar pick hanging from his neck, and the black ripped pants on his legs, followed by some combat black boots. You rocked a bit on your heels as you got closer to him, feeling your stomach slowly rising to your throat. He was smirking as he wrapped his arms around you, not too tight, but it was enough to invade you with warmth, and his cologne penetrated your nostrils, making you feel slightly dizzy.
You gulped heavily as you slowly placed your cheek on his chest, feeling the warmth on your skin growing hotter, stiffening all over as his arms pressed onto your shoulders to pull you closer.
âYour arms around me, return my amazing warm hug.â He joked, but he was actually quite nervous about this. He had told you in the last video call that he would like to greet you properly with a hug, and you agreed, after catching your breath a few times, but you did. He felt his heart beat slightly faster as your perfume invaded his sense of smell, noting the sweetness of it, but also the powerful punch to it.Â
You raised your arms, feeling them tremble slightly, slowly putting your hands against his waist, almost a brush, not putting pressure on your grip and Eddie shook his head, you could feel over yours, which was making your blush deepen even more as the butterflies in your belly were creating hurricanes and tornadoes from how wild they were flying.
âYour arms, not just your hands. Wrap your arms around me Sweetheart.â You closed your eyes at the vibration on his chest as he talked, taking another deep breath in, guiding your hands towards his back to finally wrap your arms around his waist. He chuckled and finally squished you into him, making you choke up at the sudden gesture, your chest pressing against his harshly, knocking the air out of your lungs.
âEddie, what the fuckââ You choked out with a weak voice and he finally pulled away, laughing at your reaction as you took many deep breaths to get your lungs to decompress again.
âThatâs a guy friend hug for you. Come on, Iâll prepare us some nice drinks, and guess what!â He said excitedly as you walked into his apartment, the blush still spread on your cheeks as you held your chest.Â
âWhat?â He pointed towards the coffee table in front of the couch, and there you saw the bowl of Nachos and different smaller bowls that contained salsas and dip sauces. Your face lit up as you rushed towards to sit on the couch, grabbing onto one chip and dipping it into the Guacamole he prepared, taking it with one big bite. If there was something you really loved, it was Guacamole, because it was fresh, yet rich in flavor. It was perfect.
Eddie was biting his bottom lip as he saw your eyes close in delight and he almost choked on his saliva as a soft moan vibrated on your throat. He wasnât ready for that. He really was not prepared for that sound. It caught him completely by surprise and now it was something he wonât be able to erase from his head anytime soon.Â
âGood?â He asked and you opened your eyes to smile at him, still chewing on the chip, nodding your head excitedly. He chuckles at your response, happy with it, and heads over to grab some beers from the fridge, taking off the caps with a bottle opener that is magnetized to the fridge itself. He returned to you, sitting right beside you as he handed the bottle to you.
âOh!â You hurriedly swallowed your chip as you raised the bottle to cheer. âI will cheer because today I was able to buy coffee from a shop that has a working⌠male barista.â You say proudly with a smile on your face and Eddieâs turns into shock, mouth falling agape at you.
âSeriously?â He asked and you smiled at him, nodding excitedly, repeating the same steps you did as when you told Robin about it. He was amazed by you, really, slowly becoming confident, in the way you talk, dress, and most importantly, you are confident in being yourself. You donât change your way of speaking, or your topics, or what you like just to fit in. This is what mattered the most. âWell, fuck sweetheart, congratulations to that!âÂ
You both cheered with a clink of your bottles and instantly started to dig away onto the chips. Eddie was mesmerized at how you could work from home, because it would allow you to do many things whenever you have a few minutes to spare, and he was right. You often cleaned the house, or played on your Switch.
âPlease tell me you play Mario Kart.â He said and you smirked at his words, finding out that he too owns a switch. So that was quickly plugged in, and the matches began, one after the other, Eddie choosing Mario, while you chose Peach.Â
You won every game.
âThis is rigged. Itâs absolutely rigged.â He exclaims, putting his controller on the table with a loud thud as he sipped on his beer with an angry frown on his face, while you wore a wide smile on yours, putting the controller on the coffee table too.Â
âI am just better than you in this.â You say cockily, catching him by surprise but it was indeed something you are confident in, so he will accept you being a brat for now. He sighed, shaking his head.
âI beat my brother every time, and he is like a major video game nerd. Always gets mad that this is something he canât beat me at.â He laughs as he slumps back against the couch and you stare at him, deciding to take off your shoes, to be able to sit and turn to look at him, propping your feet up on the couch, right under you, almost in a kneeling position.
âYou mentioned your brother before, also a Lord of the Rings fan.â You say to him and he chuckles, looking at you with a smile to his face. He made an âohâ sound and moved slightly towards you to be able to pull the phone out of his back pocket.Â
âA little shit I tell you.â He opened the gallery on his phone and went to look for the photos of last christmas. He found one and smiled as he looked at it, handing the phone to you.
You almost snorted your beer out of your nose as you held Eddieâs phone. Eddie was wearing the ugliest christmas sweater you had ever seen, in the color of greens and reds, reindeers all over it, while the guy next to him, with curly hair as well, but did not share any of Eddieâs facial features, wore a Rudolph sweater, and the nose was lit up.Â
âWell, these are⌠some nice sweaters!â You choke out, and he took the phone back, laughing from your reaction as he put his phone onto the table again.
âYeah, his mom bought them for us.â He replied and that caught your attention. His mom. Not their mom. He noticed how you tilted your head at the word and he straightened up, looking at you. âMy parents have been gone since I was 10. My uncle Wayne took me in, and it was just the two of us, living in a small trailer in Hawkins. Poor man had to sleep on a pull out bed in the living room so I could have my own room.â He said with a soft chuckle as he looked at his rings, playing with them as a bit of nerves filled his voice.
Talking about his past was not something he ever liked doing, but in order to strengthen his relationship with you, he knew that this conversation was coming at some point. He was glad he had alcohol to do it, even if the story of his life didnât end as tragically as he thought it would.Â
âBet he took good care of you.â You comment and Eddie simply nodded at that, a small smile appearing in his lips.
âYeah, I was a son of a bitch though. In order for some bills to be paid, I sold drugs at school, you know just your friendly metal head weed dealer.â You looked down at that, not because of disappointment of him, but to know that he had it that rough in his teenage years was making your chest feel some kind of pressure that you were not enjoying.Â
âSometimes people have to do things in order to survive.â You said this time and he smiled, taking your soft gesture at not making a big deal out of his past. He looked up at you with a smile to his face now, almost excitedly.
âBut, when I was at a gig, playing with my band, I invited my Uncle and he showed up with a lady friend called Claudia. After that, they started dating, and I met my step brother, Dustin.â He positioned himself to begin talking with his hands from the excitement he was feeling and you were mesmerized by how entranced you were with him. âI mean, he is a nerd! Like me! Star Wars, Lord of the rings, Star Trek, Lost, The Walking Dead⌠We became inseparable just like that.âÂ
You were smiling as you listened to him, he just seemed so happy about his family, about the person he is now, how despite it all he is still himself, not letting his circumstances change him or what he likes.Â
âYou were in a band?â You asked him and he nodded at you, a small glint of sadness shining in his eyes for a second.
âYeah, as you can see, I play guitar.â He said to you and motioned to one corner, where one electric guitar stood, a red one, and then next to it was an acoustic one. You nodded with an âohâ. âApart from your job, what do you do?â You turned to him and frowned slightly as you thought about that.Â
You didnât really have any hobbies, you just like to read, watch movies, play on your Switch every now and then, maybe baking sometimes when you feel inspired to do so, and now you feel a certain sense of embarrassment washing you over because of how boring you actually are. Think you are. You gazed down at your beer and fumbled with it with your fingers, clearing your throat.
âIâ Uh⌠Donât really do anything. I was as interesting as a slug, you know. Trying to just lay low, never really took an interest in anything.â Well that was depressing. Letting those words come out of your mouth, realizing that the person in front of you had a very exciting life, was slowly making you feel like curling into a ball and just staying there. Your brain was starting to work, and it began whispering things you didnât want to hear, not with him.
âYouâre so boring, you should go.â
âWhy is he even friends with someone like you?â
âItâs okay to not have any interests. Better than having forced ones put on you.â You hear Eddie say as you look up to see him shooting a caring smile at you, your mind simply shutting off as you stared at him. âSteve for example, he was pushed to be captain of the Basketball team, Swimming Team, Soccer team⌠All because his parents wanted him to be the little star.â Eddie scoffed at that, shaking his head as he looked towards the living room.
âReally? And he didnât want to do that?â You ask and Eddie simply laughs and shakes his head.
âFuck no. Steve, believe it or not, fucking loves cooking. That guy can cook us a five star meal, out of thin air. He can make chicken nuggets taste like they were done by Gordon Ramsey himself.â You giggle at that, feeling your nerves slowly leaving your body as he talks to you.
âI have to try that, see if what youâre saying is true.â He laughs at that, and nods, taking a chip, dipping it into the Sour Cream and crunching on it.Â
âYeah, ând Billy? Billy was an asshole to Steve and I in high school. Also pushed over by his father to be the best of the school. Worse than Steve.â His expression turned sour at that, his smile falling as he looked at his beer. âWhen Steve and I found him on the street, with a concussion in his head⌠I think thatâs when we decided we would take Billy with us, out of Hawkins.âÂ
You were stunned to hear the story of these three men you met no more than a month ago, in the weirdest circumstance of all. You saw them almost naked, thinking that those three men would just be the snarkiest, or most flirtatious people you would ever meet, but there is always more under the skin, under the flesh, under any layer they had created to prevent from being hurt again.
âAnd⌠How did you⌠get the jobs you have now?â You asked him and he turned to you with a playful smile on his face.Â
âThe first time we stepped on Indianapolis we got drunk, and went straight to a strip club, a female strip club. We were amazed by the amount of money they were getting on their thongs, like, Iâm talking about thousands! We just looked at eachother and wondered if we had the power to do something like that⌠Turns out, we did.â He took a sip of his beer and got up to go fetch two new bottles as you put your empty one on the coffee table, taking hold of a chip.
âSo, itâs not like a job you regret having.â You say to him and you hear him chuckle as two caps clinked onto the counter. He walked back towards you, handing you your third bottle of the night as he sat back next to you.
âNah. Itâs still work, and it pays really well, and you can also meet the strangest, yet greatest of people there too.â He says clinking his bottle on yours and you feel a blush coming up to your cheeks at that, smiling softly at him. His eyes were fixed on you, as you smiled and took a sip out of your bottle.
You are peeling your layers, one by one, slowly but surely becoming the person you probably always wanted to be, letting yourself be happy, and this goes beyond the talking to men thing. This was you finally having some confidence in yourself. Believing that you dressed nice, that you did your make up right, that you did your hair with confidence and you felt pretty in all of it.Â
Eddie was sure he was watching a butterfly coming out of their cocoon.Â
He cleared his throat and your eyes focused on him again as he shook his head to drive his attention away from you, just for a second. You tilted your head as you waited for him to talk, and after an âahâ from his part, which made you giggle, he continued.
âSo, letâs tackle the next scenario⌠What do you do on a date?â He asks you and you immediately straighten up, noticing the slight happy dizziness the alcohol was doing in your brain but you were still very much conscious, but your blood flow was betraying you, making you blush all over.
âW-What do you mean?â You ask, actually wanting him to be more specific, and he maneuvered his body to sit while facing you, just like you were doing with him.
âWell, what do you talk about? Do you know how to make a move?â You were supposed to make moves yourself? You slowly shook your head at him and he sighed at you. âWell, for example, on a date, you talk about very superficial stuff. Work, movies, food, music. Thatâs really the basic stuff.â You were mentally taking notes of that with a nod to your head.
âSo, no talks about⌠politics, family, religion?â You ask him and he laughs at you, his dimples dipping into his cheeks and you felt the burning on your ears again as you saw his smile while he shook his head.
âNo. And nothing deep either⌠A little bit of what we just did now, but less intimate. I ask about your workplace, you ask about mine. You ask about my hobbies, I ask about yours. Keep it simple and short, maybe throw a little funny story here and there about stuff.â You raised your eyebrow at that, confused by what he might mean.
âA funny story?â You ask him and he nods at you.
âLike, for example, when I asked you about your friends and you told me about Robin and the Raccoon, which itâs still very funny to imagine it till this day.â He says with a chuckle and you follow him with a giggle, catching onto what he was saying.Â
âGot it, funny works.â He nods at that, and you feel him getting closer to you.
âAlright, now⌠Normally, on dates, the men do not make any physical moves to show interest. Thatâs the ladyâs job. If we are already engaging in a conversation with you, we are already interested, we are as simple as that⌠But a woman, you have to let us know you are interested, and that is all done with body language.â He finished and you were just blinking, almost wide eyed as he stared right back at you.
âB-Body language?â You ask him and he immediately laughs at your reaction, shaking his head.
âIâm not talking about pouncing on the guy. Look, Iâm gonna touch you, okay?â He says this time and that for some reason sent a shiver down your spine, and you felt uncomfortable so you moved your legs a bit as he scooted closer. âOkay, so, one common move is laughing and placing your hand on the bicep.âÂ
âOh, Iâve seen that in a movie! Wait, that actually works?â You ask tilting your head slightly and he smiles at you, nodding his head.
âLike a charm. You justââ He made a funny laugh, sort of a Santa Claus one, making you laugh as well as he moved back and then forward again, putting his hand on your left bicep, running his fingers down for just one second and pulling back again. You felt the area where he touched grow hot, and you bit your bottom lip at how easy he was making this look. âYou touch for a second, do not linger more than that, because that would be too obvious, or too desperate.âÂ
âOh? I mean, isnât the whole idea of it for guys to know that I am interested though?â You asked and he nodded slightly to then shake his head afterwards.
âYes and no. Itâs confusing, but we do like a little bit of a chase. If we get it too easily, our interest kind of⌠fades away.â You grimaced at his words, showing him a look of slight disgust.Â
âAnd you guys say we are the complicated ones.â You say, taking a sip of your beer and he widens his eyes, looking at you, putting his arm along the backrest of the couch, towards you.Â
âHey, we are very simple! In many, many aspects, sweetheart.â You were still facing him, biting onto the inside of your left cheek, trying to hide the smirk as you squinted at him.
âLike what? Throwing big rocks into a lake and rate the splash?â You ask as your left hand starts to slowly creep up on the back rest, without him noticing, a laugh vibrating in his throat at your words.
âExactly, we just like a little bit of a struggle, thatâs all. It makes the tension grow between you and your date.â He explained and your fingers found their way onto his right forearm which were still resting onto the backrest towards you. You hummed at that, taking a sip of your beer.
âBut, wouldnât you risk losing the date? What if you take too long and donât give in in time?â You ask him as your fingers start to trace onto his bat tattoo, still looking at him. Your heart was beating with excitement as you saw him shiver slightly but was still not realizing you were touching him at all.
âWe always give in, itâs at the third move thatâ'' He shivered again and his eyebrows knitted together as he felt the tingling sensation on his forearm. He looked at it and saw you passing your nails on his tattoos, and his belly twisted, simply and aggressively twisted. His intestines were knotting with each other and he was sure his brain short circuited. You were touching him. You were deliberately touching him, flirting with confidence, and you made sure he didnât notice.
How long have you been touching him like that? And why does it feel so good when itâs just your nails brushing against his skin, tracing the drawings that were inked on him, and you werenât even batting an eye at that. He slowly turned to look at you, and thatâs when he saw your amused face, biting on your tongue as you smiled at him. A laugh started coming up on his throat, as his nerves flew away from his fingers.
âShit, that was smooth Princess.â And to his dismay, you put your hand away, taking a sip of your beer. He was still staring at your movements, completely entranced. He was feeling his heart about to burst and he looked down at his beer, deciding this would be the last one for the night. Yep. It would be the last one.
âThank you, I saw it on Friends.â You say with a wiggle of your eyebrows and he finally let out a cackle, amazed that you tried on a move from a tv show on him, and that it actually worked. He was slightly flustered and maybe that had to do with the alcohol in his system as well.
Your laughing slowly faded away as you looked down at your beer. The dread of the possibilities of what would happen after a move being made could trigger. Possibilities you werenât sure if youâve done right. Things you donât know if you ever did, and what if it were done to you?Â
âOkay, whatâs going on in that head of yours now?â Eddie asks, slightly worried at the change of expressions you just had. Were you regretting something? Maybe touching him?Â
âWhat if it goes well?â Was your simple question. Eddie blinked at that, not fully understanding what you were asking.
âWhat if⌠what goes well?â
âI-I mean, what ifâ What if the date goes well? What ifââ You were a blushing mess, almost sweating as you tried to word your thoughts out without sounding like a child, without sounding pathetic, looking everywhere but his face. But Eddieâs eyes softened, looking at you, seeing you stammer in your words, trying to let them out of your mouth with no luck, but he knew exactly what you wanted to ask.
âYou mean if he kisses you?â Your breath caught in your throat at that and you hid your face into your hands in shame. Youâve kissed before, but was it ever good? Was it enjoyable? Did you do it right? Did they do it right? You knew you didnât put much effort into them because you just werenât attracted to the people youâve kissed, you just wanted the experience to be over with, just like your virginity.
But kissing someone attractive, youâve never done that.
âYeah⌠I meanâ I can do it but⌠I donât know if I did it rightâŚâ You said almost in a whisper, ashamed of your words, of being 25 years old and still worry about your kissing skills. Voicing your worries to a man thatâs done more kissing than you did in your whole life, much more, way more. Eddie frowned at your words, and shifted on his seat, raising his hand up to put it under your chin for you to look at him. You slowly locked eyes with his and the feel of his hand on your skin, just made your butterflies flutter all inside of your belly, your head getting lighter at the touch. He smiled gently at you, pulling his hand away.
âSweets, one thing you have to understand is⌠Attractive people donât have superpowers.â He says to you and you frowned at that in confusion, tilting your head to the side while looking at him.
âWhat do you mean?âÂ
âI mean, just because a person is hot, doesnât mean they are experts at everything. You can find hot people that are lousy kissers, bad at flirting, horrible at sex, like, finish in two seconds and thatâs that. Hot people that are assholes, like certified with a capital A⌠Just because you find someone attractive, doesnât mean they have more experience than you, in any way.â
You drank in his words, processing them in your head. You never thought of it like that, not ever. You just thought that people that are attractive have more chances of experiences, and that leads them to have some practice. Eddie was looking at how you were absorbing that information, and he noticed how your shoulders lost their tension, slumping down a bit on your body.
He was feeling the buzz of the beer as he took a sip from it and put it on the coffee table, a warmth expanding on his body as he scooted just one jump closer to you, which made you look at him again.
âIâll tell you a secret, and you wonât tell them I told you okay?â He starts and you nod slowly at that, straightening up once again to listen to him. He smiled at you and continued. âSo, you saw Steve. Fucking handsome right? With that hair, the freckles, fucking lady killer.â
âY-Yeah.â You nodded slightly at that, feeling the anxiety of admitting Steve was hot not as painful as it once would have been.Â
âYeah, he couldnât kiss for shit.â Eddie says with a smile and your eyes widened at that, not believing what he was saying. A man like Steve? Not knowing how to kiss?! âYouâre looking at me like Iâm lying, but I swear Iâm not. When we first started working at the club, and Steve kissed clients, they would complain to Joyce that he was too sloppy, too much saliva.â
âOh godâŚâ You giggle as you take a sip from your beer, wincing in disgust at the thought of a kiss with overloading saliva. Eddie laughed at that, nodding.
âYep⌠He was so bummed out because he wanted to be one of the favorites and he knew that if he didnât kiss he wasnât going to get it. So⌠Billy helped.â You spat your drink away from Eddie at that and he started laughing hysterically at your reaction. Your eyes were almost bulging out of your sockets as you listened to that.
âAre you joking!?â He shakes his head at you, still laughing, his shoulders shaking up and down at the motion.
âFuck no. Imagine my fucking shock when I came in here and I found them making out on the kitchen. It was traumatizing.â He says and your eyes were still like plates as you stared at him. âThey arenât dating if thatâs what you are going yo ask, Steve is bisexual but Billy is straight. He just wanted to help Steve.â You blinked rapidly at that, and gave one nod, frowning at that. Friends helped eachother like that?
âSo, that makes Billy a good kisser then.â You say and Eddie nods with a shrug.
âThat must be, BUT, Billy was very forceful when handling the clients. Pulling their chairs, or turning them, or grabbing their shoulders. He really didn't know how to treat them.â He says and you tilted your head with a surprised âohâ on your lips. Now what Eddie was saying about everyone, despite how they looked, had flaws was making more sense to you.
âSo, Steve taught him to be gentle?â You asked and Eddie smirked, shaking his head and pointing at himself.
âNope. That would be me. I taught him how to pull a chair with force but not a violent one, or how to grab a chin or a shoulder without digging his digits into the skin.â He explains and you were just staring at him, nodding at every word he was saying. You licked your lips as the nerves started forming a lump in your throat, looking down at your bottle of beer which was half empty by now.
âSo, that would make you⌠Flawless?â You try to giggle and Eddie couldnât help but feel his chest warm at your slight praise, but he was far from what you just said. He shook his head and smiled at you.
âHell no⌠I couldnât dance for shit.â He says to you and you raise your head up in complete surprise. âI didnât know how to move my hips like Channing Tatum does, and Steve was the one to help with that. You might have noticed that night that out of the three of us, Steve is the one that moves the most.â You shook your head nervously at that, looking at the empty bowl of chips on the coffee table.
âThat night is still kinda hazy, but I remember one thing or two.â You were sure you were a deep red now, remembering Steve on his knees as he prayed to Nancy, Billyâs hip grinding against Barb, and Eddieâs kiss and fingers down someoneâs throat.Â
âSo, yeah, we all have flaws, and we all have experience and inexperience.â He finishes saying, looking up at the ceiling, not noticing how you put the beer on the table, sitting up straight now, not facing him, your feet back on the floor as you fumbled with your hands on your knees.
The knots in your belly now turned into painful vines, full of thorns as your body burned in anticipation. You knew this would cross a line, you knew this was a big step, and you knew this was not right, and for some reason, you knew this would be a mistake.Â
But, there is also a part of you that knows you want this. And that part is winning over all of the other things that were stopping you.
âS-So⌠You guys helped each other.â You began talking and he shrugged, still looking up at the ceiling as he rested against the backrest of the couch.
âYeah, cause weâre friends. Itâs what friends do, have each other's back.â You nodded at that, slowly as you gulped down the lump that was forming in your throat and your feet turned cold.
âFriendsâŚâ You were almost breathing heavily, your nails digging onto your knees as your heart started beating into your ears, hearing every thump of it as it rapidly made your blood flow to every inch of your body. âA-And⌠Weâre friends⌠right?â
Eddieâs eyes almost came out of his skull because of how wide he just stared at the ceiling. Were you actually asking him what he thought you were asking? Nah, it couldnât be possible. It wasnât real, right? He slowly looked down and you were already looking at him, jumping slightly as he locked eyes with you, making you flinch your gaze away in embarrassment.
He was still trying to understand that what you were asking was real. You wanted his help, but he was fighting with himself because he didnât want you to think he was taking advantage of you for trusting him. He really didnât want you to think that. But if you were the one askingâŚÂ
âSweets, are you asking me what I think you are asking me?â He asks, and he wants verbal confirmation, even if it takes you an eternity to say it, he will wait. His chest was hurting from how fast his heart was beating into it, and he wanted to punch it to make it calm down. You were a friend asking for help, he has to get a hold of himself.
âI-Itâs stupid, donât worry, f-forget what I just said!â Your mind was telling you to run away. You crossed the line, you fucked it up. Why would he want to kiss you anyways? You werenât anything special, just a friend, and he kissed beautiful women almost every night. You were inexperienced, and you would probably fuck it up, completely and he would laugh at you, or what if he winces in disgust at you? What ifâ
âDarling, darling, darling⌠Calm down.â You felt his hand on your knee and your eyes looked down to your lap, not realizing that your legs had been jumping up and down uncontrollably. Your breathing was slightly heavy as you shook your head still looking down.
âI-I shouldnât haveâ I meanâ Weâre-Weâre friendsââ And Eddie wasnât going to let you belittle yourself. He knew what was coming next, so he stopped your rambling with just his voice.
âHoney, I would be honored to help you with this.â
Your body froze all of its movements. Your legs, your quivering lips, the digging of your nails on your jeans, and even your heart steadied itself, almost non beating. His hand was still on your knee and you saw him pulling it back to himself as he waited for you to reincorporate yourself.Â
Did he say honored? Why would he be honored? You have to stop thinking, you have to stop. You need to push the thoughts away, he said he will help you, itâs just that. Help. It doesnât mean anything else, but a friend helping another friend. Nothing more. Itâs nothing more.
You slowly turned your head to face him and he was wearing a soft encouraging smile as he looked at you. He wasnât going to show his nervousness, and he didnât even know what he was nervous about. He has kissed plenty of women in his lifetime, but you, for some reason, were making his knees tremble slightly, as well as feeling like bending over from the constant knot in his stomach.
âYou okay?â He asked you and you were still looking at him, face red as you tried to mumble out words.
âY-Youâre sure you want to⌠kiss me?â You asked him and his eyebrows turned into a frown at your question. He knew there was more to it than simply asking him if he wanted to kiss a friend to help her. He knew there was something deeper behind those words, something darker.
âDarling, youâre fucking beautiful, Iâd be more than honored to kiss you.â He said with a fist pump in the air to try to ease up the tense situation and it seems it worked, because you let out a soft huff, almost a giggle, and he saw your fingers no longer digging on your jeans. He took a deep breath in and positioned himself, sitting next to you, but facing you, crossed legs under him. âOkay, I need you to, first, let yourself go.â
He put his arms out and started shimming all over, just moving all his arms and body erratically as if trying to get a bug away from him. You laughed at his movements and sat in the same position, facing him and shaking yourself to lose the tension on your body, making him laugh at you, scanning you all over for a second as you joined him in the laughter.
This moment right here between you two, was too easy, too natural, and it felt as if it were right, and it had always been destiny that you two should meet. He was enjoying this moment with you, finally something different in his daily life. His calls with you, whenever you show him a new piece of clothing you got for yourself, and it wasnât only with him.
Steve and Robin talked privately too, but it was as if they were soulmates, long lost souls that should have been together a long time ago. Platonically. He wondered if that was the same with you. If your relationship was platonic of some sort, only focused on it being friendship⌠And thereâs another part of him that wished it wasnât that.
âRight so⌠Iâm going to start slow, okay? So first things first.â He grabbed your hand gently, pulling it up towards his lips to finally press them against your knuckles. You took a sharp intake of breath at that, feeling him against your skin in this way was something you were not really prepared for. You shivered at his touch, and you felt your belly just yearning for more, your mind no longer wanting to run away. He lingered his lips there, looking at your reaction until you met his eyes again and you took a deep breath in with a nod.
Eddie now knew you were okay with his touch, putting your hand down once again. He licked his lips in anticipation as he looked into your eyes who were looking at him with expectation, waiting for his next move. He raised his hand up towards your right cheek and leaned forward. Your breath completely stopped as you felt your stomach just contract on itself, shutting your eyes tightly and bracing for what he was going to do, until you felt his lips press gently onto your left cheek.Â
It was burning your skin almost.
âNo need to act so pained about it.â He let out a nervous chuckle out of his lips as he saw your scrunched up face. You opened your eyes to see him looking at you again, and dropping his hand down from your face. âOkay, now, I want you to reciprocate that. Kiss my cheek, Iâll close my eyes so you can be comfortable.âÂ
When Eddie closed his eyes, you couldnât help but stare at him. He just looked way too beautiful, untouchable almost, tingles going from the bottom of your neck to the tip of your fingers. Your heart was painfully beating into your chest cavity as you slowly leaned in, keeping your eyes open just to not miss the spot on his left cheek. You had to press your hands on his needs to keep yourself stable as your lips inched closer to his skin.
You held your breath in as you finally pressed your flesh with his, yours soft, plump against a warm cheek that was tinting itself in a pink hue. You let the air leave your lung as you rapidly sat back in place, taking your hands away from his knees. He gulped heavily as he composed himself, opening his eyes to look at you.Â
Your eyes were on your lap as you fumbled with your fingers, and he wanted to laugh, almost giggling he could say at how red you were looking. But he wasnât going to do that, because you were doing good, great even, but now comes the difficult part, one of the few.Â
âThat was soft sweetheart, thank you.â You almost whined at the praise but because you just felt getting redder and redder from embarrassment and adrenaline. You slowly looked up at him, and you suddenly saw the hint of nervousness cross his features, making your eyebrows twitch in confusion. âUm⌠Now, I will give you a peck on the lips. You can close your eyes this time, and then I want you to give one back to me, that okay?âÂ
Oh, your breathing quickened at that. You clenched your fists tightly, closing your eyes as you nodded at him, barely, but he could figure it out. He raised a hand up, and he noticed the particular shakiness at the tip of his fingers, frowning at them because he never twitched. He never trembled. He never got nervous. He held onto your left cheek and you jumped slightly at the touch, not expecting it and you tightened your lips together. He chuckled with a shake of his head.
âDonât tighten your lips. Relax angel, itâs just me.â He softly says and the way his voice sounds on your ears, make you actually slump a little bit, relax your muscles as well as your lips. He looked down at them, feeling his breathing quicken its pace, but he held those breaths in, trying to not show how he was feeling to you, which he didnât even know what feelings he was feeling himself.Â
He leaned down, pulling your face towards him, slowly and agonizingly. You wanted to open your eyes to see how far he was from you, as your belly just screamed at you to lean closer, but you stayed put. Waiting, and after what felt like ages, in the darkness behind your eyelids, you finally felt his lips connect with yours. A sharp intake of breath was taken on your part due to the shock, and also because of how surprisingly soft he was being. A soft subtle moan vibrated in your throat at the touch and he had to contain the urge to move his lips on yours, wanting to devour you. Your hands itched with the need of grabbing onto him, and it was shocking you because you never felt this. You never felt the need for more.Â
Because thatâs all you could think about now. More. You wanted more.
He pulled away from you, the peck being only for one or two seconds but to the two of you seemed like minutes. He opened his eyes at the same time you opened yours and he swears that he felt an electric shock run down his body as his pupils connected with yours. Your breaths were mixing with one another, because Eddie was still in your space, noses almost touching.
He pulled away from you, causing you to exhale a deep sigh you didnât know you were holding in, and he dropped his hand from your cheek. He ignored the lingering burning sensation that was left on his palm as he gazed at you once again, a soft smile spreading on his lips.
âYou okay?â He asked you and you could only nod. He chuckled at your reaction and scooted closer, now knees touching. âAlright, your turn.â
Fuck, that made all of your consciousness return to you in one big slap. It was your turn to kiss him. But you could do it right? It was just a peck, just a quick peck. You could do that, it was something fast, just like he did to you. You couldnât feel your fingers as you raised your hand up to cup his left cheek. You scrunched your eyes closed and leaned in, quick, pulling him as well, but you felt him fight against your grip and you opened your eyes to see him squinting at you.
âWhatââ
âSlower. If you come at me that fast you are gonna knock our teeth out Angel. Just go slow, no need to be quick.â And there was a part of him that just said that to be able to be in this moment for a little longer. You felt embarrassed at his scolding and you wanted to pull away, feeling completely pathetic and childish for your actions. You took a deep breath in again as you continued to lean in, but this time slower, pulling him towards you in the same manner, gentler and he was content with that.
You closed your eyes when your lips brushed his, and he kept them open just before you pressed your lips to his to look at your face. You werenât scrunching your eyebrows, or grimacing in pain or discomfort, so he knew you were okay right now. He closed his eyes after a second and you just wanted to stay there. Your lips on his, as your palm rested on his cheek, your nails wanting to dig in his flesh to pull him even closer.
You didnât know if this would feel like this with every man you would kiss later on, you hoped it did. You hoped this wasnât just happening with Eddie, because he is just a friend. Thatâs all he was. A friend helping another friend.
You pulled away after another second, dropping your hand from his face and this time you didnât gaze towards your lap again. You kept staring at his face, waiting for his eyes to open, your chest now burning for the next move.Â
His brown eyes connected with yours again, and he smiled reassuringly at you, as if telling you that you were doing good, that everything was fine, and that you were safe with him at this very moment. You took a deep breath in, giving him a small smile in return, feeling your cheeks aching thanks to the amount of blood that is pooled there.
âAlright⌠Next is the tricky part. Iâm going to move my lips against yours this time. When I kiss your top lip, you kiss my bottom lip, and then the other way around.â You know how kissing works, youâre not an idiot. You have done it before just the way he describes it, but the question always lingered if you were any good at it. If you were too pushy, or too soft, or too slow, or too quick.Â
You took a deep breath in to brace yourself, and exhaled, giving him a nod for him to continue. Now, Eddie was almost sweating. He didnât want to feel that way towards you, but he was still a man, and you were beautiful. A very beautiful woman. So of course his body will react, he just has to remind himself that you are just a friend and that you need help.Â
And he is just helping.Â
He raised both of his hands up this time and your eyes almost went wide when he cupped your face in between them, getting a sense of feeling trapped but in a good way. The coldness of his rings and the warmth of his palms filled you with a sense of peace. You felt safe. You started hearing a buzz in your ears, knowing it was the intense flow of blood that was going all over your body, as the anxiety in your stomach was almost ripping its way out, wanting to break your skin, or wanting to crawl up into your throat.Â
âLean in with me sweetheart.â He commanded and your eyes were burning, your hands moving towards his knees again, trembling fingers finding the skin in the rips of them, your breathing hitching as you both moved towards one another, his fingers softly getting in between your hair, palms on your cheeks still and you closed your eyes.
He took a gulp, closing his eyes right after you, feeling your nails digging into the skin of his knees, softly scratching at him, almost desperately and he didnât know if you were eager or nervous, but you were leaning in, and that was a good enough sign for him to press his lips against yours again, this time, with more pressure than before.
Your heart soared, beating wildly but not because of complete nervousness or because you wanted to run away from it, but because you were content. Content because you werenât sweating out of a panic, content because you didnât feel like fainting, content because the dizziness you were feeling was because of the rush, the adrenaline, the excitement of it all.Â
His lips finally moved on yours, and you let your instincts kiss him back, following his lead. He was being gentle, slow, lips between lips and the smacking of them being heard all over the apartment. Your fingers were gripping on his knees as if your life depended on it, to keep you grounded to earth. There was a part of your brain that was telling you that friends shouldnât do this, that friends do not kiss each other, not even for practice.Â
But maybe those thoughts were wrong, because here you were, and Eddieâs self control was slipping. He wanted to move to the next step, but he wanted to properly warn you, he really wanted to, but with the way you were touching him, and the way you were tenderly moving your lips with his, was slowly but surely making him lose his composure of being a good friend.Â
He had to be quick then, because you seemed into it, and if you stopped you might become nervous again and it will take more time for you to prepare yourself. He kept moving his lips on yours, your heads moving from side to side and you felt like you were being kissed like they do in the movies. Romantical and gentle. But something was slowly snapping inside of you, something that was clawing its way back in your throat.
More. You wanted more.
He pulled away but his hands were kept in place, his lips remained over yours as the heavy breathing of each other mixed in between you both. You opened your eyes to meet his, and he saw the hazy look in your eyes, the same look he must be having right now, and you might not even know how you are looking at him, but he knows how he is looking at you. And it was different, different than before. Way different.
âIâm gonna go further now, stop me if youâre uncomfortable.â Before you could even formulate any sentence, think of anything at all, his lips crashed against yours, this time, more forcefully than before, and it shot another feeling inside of you. It was something you didnât experience before, something that made you magnetized to him, and you cannot pinpoint what name to give it.
You moved your lips against his, following his movements, and your eyebrows shot up in surprise when you felt his tongue brush against your lower lip, gently, asking for entrance. This was the part where your inexperience might show, and you didnât want to disappoint him, not when he was making you feel like this, not when he was the first person to kiss you like this.
You felt him rub your right cheek gently with his thumb, trying to soothe you down, telling you that you can still stop him. But you wanted anything but that. So despite your guts trying to make you bend over in pain, despite your brain throwing red signs all over to make you run away, and despite your heart beating so fast you were sure he would be able to hear it, you slowly opened your mouth, letting him in.
And he was so grateful for it.
His tongue slowly sneaked in between your lips, meeting with your nervous tongue. He moved, gentle and slow, small swirls which you danced with him harmoniously. He let out a huff of breath through his nose, trying to swallow a grunt because your hands had gone up to grip onto his thighs now, pulling yourself closer to him, and deeper into the kiss.
You were a good kisser, even in your nervousness, even if you told him you didnât know if you were even doing it right, you smashed all of that in one second. One of his hands went deeper into your scalp, running his fingers through your hair as he felt the temperature of the room start to rise up. Your tongue was magical on him, so tender and delicate, yet he could hear the soft little moans that vibrated in your throat at every harsh movement he did on you. He could feel his pants starting to strain, and he cursed himself for being so easy to rile up, or maybe cursing at himself for wanting toâ
The door opening caught both of your attention, your eyes widening as you both pulled away as quickly as you could. Panting heavily as you looked at one another, not even knowing for how long you have been making out with each other. It felt like seconds, but probably minutes had passed.Â
âWell, shit, did we interrupt something?â Billy asks with Steve standing next to him with a bag over his shoulder. Your whole body turned red and you squealed as you hid your face in your hands, wishing for the earth to swallow you whole. They saw you. They saw you kissing Eddie. Your friend. Oh god, what will they think? You thought you were an idiot, a very big idiot.
âI uhââ Eddie was at a loss of words and he looked at his friends. He knew you were feeling utterly embarrassed at this moment, so he knew he had to ease the situation up a bit. âWe were practicing kissing.âÂ
And that made you even more embarrassed, your head shooting up to smack Eddie on the arm. Why would he tell them that?! Now they know you have no experience in that department and that Eddie was helping you gain confidence in it. Great. You shook your head, becoming more overwhelmed each second that passed.
âNo need to hit me! You are a good kisser, despite what you thought.â Eddie brushed his arm as Billy and Steve walked over to the two of you. You groaned into your hands as you felt the heat of your face transfer onto your palms, and your guts were turning, the feeling of nausea slowly filling your stomach.
âWell, I bet it went better than with Harrington over here.â Billy glared at his friend as Steve blushed all over and pointed at you.
âDude, she doesnât need to know about thatââ
âActuallyâŚâ Eddie begins with an innocent dimpled smile on his face and Steve became red in anger, ready to start going at his best friends but a giggle was heard in the room and they all turned to you.
You were laughing into your hands, and the situation that had mortified you now was making you laugh because of their bantering. They werenât judging you, not you, nor Eddie because they had been through it. They helped each other out with things that were either weird or too bizarre, yet they did it because theyâre friends.Â
âIâm sorry, I didnât mean to laugh.â You say, as you raise your head up again, locking eyes with Eddie who had a playful glint in them and both of you laughed with each other, or at each other, you didnât know, but just having this moment with him felt nice, it felt as if nothing had changed. No awkwardness, no weirdness, nothing that makes you feel uncomfortable, or him for that matter.Â
He was still Eddie, and you were still you.
âAlright, hang on, I have a question.â Steve suddenly says, putting the bag with clothes down. He was still sweaty from work, his hair back with a small half ponytail. Eddie and you stopped laughing and looked at Steve to keep talking. âMy question is, are you fine with kissing someone you trust, or are you fine with kissing men in general?â Your smile dropped at that, the thought being processed in your head.
You didnât even think about that. What if kissing Eddie was easy, or kind of easy, because you trusted him? What if you were able to just because you can confide that part of yourself to him, because he is your friend? Will that happen with the men you meet?
âWhat Steve is trying to say is that when you go on a date, you donât trust each other on the first one, but you might kiss, maybe something else.â He said with a wiggle of his eyebrows, earning a glare from Eddieâs part, and you gazed away from that dirty joke.Â
Steve stood there for a second, thinking and then he took out his phone to open his music player and choose a song from there. âStereo Loveâ started sounding from the speakers and you winced at the nostalgia of the song, Eddie chuckling at it and Billy simply rolling his eyes. Steve puts the phone on the coffee table and urges you to get up from the couch.Â
âCome on, letâs try something.â And you gave Eddie a confused look before doing as Steve says, following him to the middle of the living room as Billy took your place on the couch, dropping himself on it and grunting in relief. Eddieâs eyes were focused on you as you stood in front of Steve.
âHarrington, what are youââ Eddie tried to talk but he was stopped by one look from Steve. His chest was not liking where this was going but he remained quiet as Steve started swaying side to side.
âOkay, so, I imagine that you go to clubs, and guys approach you, right?â He asks and you look down, playing with your fingers as you talk back to him.
âThe girls always pushed them away before they could talk to me.â You reply and Steve only scoffs at that and shakes his head. He dances all around you, on your side, behind you, on the other side, as he talks.
âWell, now you will let them talk to you. He is a complete stranger, just coming right up, dancing, and introducing himself.â He stops right in front of you, with a smirk to his face and your eyes slightly widened as his friendly expressions were exchanged by sultry ones. âDo you like this song?â
âUm, a little old but yes, I do.â You responded to him and he just kept the grin to his face as his movements started making him come closer, and closer to you.
âHi, Iâm Steve.â You were already blushing at the roleplaying but he was right, what will happen when you start trying to date someone? You wonât kiss them on the first date? You wonât show your attraction to them? You wonât make a move?Â
âHi, Iâm Angel.â You reply with a small smile on your lips and Eddieâs eyes widened. You were flirting, and you were flirting with Steve with a pet name he gave you, and you only. He gulped heavily as you swayed closer to him.
âThatâs a very pretty name, just as gorgeous as the bearer of it.â He winks at you and you almost lose your willpower at that. With Eddie was different, way different. It was a different type of nervousness, a different type of adrenaline, a different type of excitement. This was just nervousness.
So maybe, Steve was right.Â
Before you could respond, Steveâs lips crashed onto yours, and Billy was studying your body language. You went rigid, frozen, eyes completely wide at the action. He could see the slight bit of paleness starting to drain your cheeks and he was about to call out Steve to pull away, but then your eyes closed, and your lips moved against his.
You noticed the difference with Eddieâs kiss. With Eddieâs, your mind shut off, didnât even think about anything else and just let yourself feel, feel him, feel his lips on yours, his skin on yours. And now, Steveâs, you were conscious of how your lips were moving, and wondering if you were causing an impression or not.
Steve pulled away after a few seconds to study your face and do a whole check over, before cheering with delight and clapping for you with pride.
âYou kissed me back, you didnât faint, you flirted with me⌠Yep, youâre cured honey!â Steve says excitedly and you couldnât help but feel excited with him. It was a big step, a huge change in your life. Even if the nerves were still there, the anxiety was still deep in your belly, and the thoughts sometimes appeared in your head to speak horrible things to you, you finally didnât let them control your body.
You were finally cracking your shell open.
And as you cheered, you didnât notice the pair of brown eyes that were looking at you.
âMunson⌠Youâre going to break the cushion.â Billy says, without even looking at Eddie and the metal head looked down at the cushion of the couch, seeing his fist gripping tightly onto it, almost ripping through the fabric, his knuckles a bright shade of white from how hard he was clenching them, rings digging into his fingers. He also noticed the tense movements on his jaw and he realized that he had been clenching it tightly shut since Steve pressed his lips on yours.
Your lips that had his minutes before. Your tongue that danced with him, your body that touched him, his hands that were on you, your body heat invading his, and his jagged breaths invading your mouth. He had you first.Â
You were his, first.
You turned to look at Eddie, with a smile on your face and he tried to return the smile to you, fighting the uncomfortable feeling that was happening in his belly, trying to push away all the negative thoughts, but then he remembered the look in your eyes just before he leaned in to kiss you again. He was looking at you in the exact same way, and hope rose in his chest, because the eyes you were looking at him with, were full of lust.
And you might not even know or realize you were looking at him like that. You probably never once felt lustful towards someone. You probably never had that need of wanting someone so badly that you might explode.
But Eddie, Eddie was feeling it right now. He was feeling it alright, and had been feeling it ever since he saw you in that tight purple dress. He felt it when you smiled at him for the first time on video camera. He felt it when you introduced him to your favorite pizza. He felt it when you beat him up in Mario Kart. He felt it when you had called him beautiful. And now, he felt it when he finally had a taste of you.
Oh how he wanted you.Â
Eddie really, absolutely, desperately wanted you.
End of part 4
A/N: I really do hope you all enjoyed this chapter, your comments always make me happy... we can all feel the tension building, can't we? Just a peek, next chapter will be spicy.
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Unedited, not proof-read. No plan, just a brain dump. A quick write, short story. Thereâs potential for a second chapter but no plan for it.
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When Merlara thought about camping, she never really thought she would be lost in the depths of snowy Alaska at sunset. With nothing but a small fleece blanket and her emergency supplies wrapped in it, all tied together with a thread. She remembers her small Lexus being plummeted by snow when she got out of it to get wood for a fire. There wasnât a lot of shelter,and no trees. Just a lot of standing deadwood. As she gathered the deadwood, she thanked her past self that she packed a flint and steel in her pack. This practically made her journey easy.Â
Walking back to her car, she noticed that the wind picked up and there was more snow in the air. When she got to her car, it was covered in snow and frozen in place. She tried the door handle, nothing. She tried the trunk, nothing still. At this moment she realised she would have to camp outside of her car until she could melt the locks and handles. It would be awhile before she could get the car running again, though.Â
So to kill the time, she decided to dig in the snow until she found soil. From then, she would start a fire. She quickly up her hair into braids so it wasnât in her face and got to work.Â
She started digging, thankfully it was only a few feet of snow. She dug out the size of about a queen mattress and threw the deadwood into the pit. Upon gathering, she also found a paper-like bark on the deadwood and decided to use it as tinder. She stuck the paper bark in the middle of the pile and began sending sparks towards it with her flint and steel. This caused the paper bark to crackle and burn, beginning a fire. She stood up and backed away, walking back over to her car. She set her fleece wrapped pack against the tire and waited for the fire to gain momentum. As it got bigger, she took a couple of small extra twigs and held them to the fire, allowing them to catch fire. She immediately stood by the driver side door, holding the flaming stick neat the handle. Until the fire got close to her fingers, she held it there. And when it did get close, she tossed the stick back over to the fire pit. It was calming down now, but still big. She used her shirt to grab the handle. She pulled, and the handle moved this time thankfully, but the door didnât budge. She took her key and clicked the unlock button. She pulled again, but it still didnât move. Afraid she might break the handle, she let go of it.
Merlara began to think, the door might be more frozen than she thought. But the more she waits, the worse it will get. She decides to try the trunk, as it has her gear inside and can provide shelter for the night. She does her whole menagerie again, but this time she holds the stick loser to the edges of the door. As the stick in Merlaraâs hand burns out, the sunset begins to melt into night. She clicks the button, and besides the pieces of ice left on the edges, the car automatically pulls itself open. Success!Â
She immediately climbs inside and dives into her bag for a granola bar. Then she notices the fire. Itâs beginning to die out and she doesnât have any more tinder. She scrambles out the trunk of the car and goes for the pile of deadwood. Can this day get any worse? She mumbles. The deadwood is moist from the snow. She decides to put it on the fire anyway and hopes it does the trick. She sets it around the edges of the fire. At this point, Merlara is starving again. She grabs a small billy pot and her spoon. She packed a dayâs worth of food. Just some Kichiwey and squaw bread. She heats up her meal in the billy pot over the dying fire. She also grabs her extra large blanket. She knows that if she leaves the trunk door open for too long, it might not end well. So she climbs in the trunk and puts the back seats down. She can finally reach the front of the car, now too. She charges her phone with her already charged solar battery and sets it inside the car.Â
Merlara grabs the billy pot with the bubbling meal, and sets it in the trunk on some thick cloth. She needs to find a way to stay warm inside the car, but canât take the fire inside for obvious reasons. She hopes her thousands of blankets will help and the hot billy pot. She grabs one of her separate billy pots and fills it with snow.
As she is filling it, Merlara remembers the logs she set by the fire. She grabs them the best she can and shoves them closer to the flame, hoping it sticks. She sets the billy pot on a log and balances it over the fire so it can boil. She grabs her emergency pack and sets it in the trunk before climbing inside. She wraps herself in a sheepskin pelt on top of her fleece blanket. She begins to feel safe, finally. She sets her keys and knife near her phone. Merlara eats the kichiwey and when sheâs done, she sets aside the still warm pot near her blankets to hopefully gather some warmth. She gets up and checks on the snow, with it now warm she just waits for it to boil.
The fire is now dying fast, and Merlara is cold. She needs to get in the trunk of her car and she needs to do it quickly before she freezes. Just before the water boils, she grabs her thick cloth and grabs the billy pot by the handle. She carries it over to the trunk, careful of spills. She sets it in the corner closer to the door and climbs inside. As it is now very dark and the wind is howling, she reaches up and closes the trunk door. The howling stops, and itâs now deadly quiet.Â
The silence rings in her ear painfully. And in desperate need for sound, she powers her phone on and clicks the first youtube video she can find before she goes crazy. Her red hair is messy with dirt and sticks, and has snow sticking to it. She pulls it off to the best of her ability. The hot billy pots arenât providing much warmth, but it's better than out there. She takes off her outer layers. Her boots, socks, jackets, and thick jeans come off and are folded up next to the boiling hot water. Itâs still hot, thankfully. She gets on her knees and shuffles around some sheepskin and fleece blankets before she has a comfortable bed. She uses her thick jacket as a pillow and moves the billy pot to somewhere she knows she wonât kick it.Â
As Merlara lays down and changes her video to something she downloaded for the trip, she watches it and settles down.Â
She hopes she has an easier time getting out of this mess than she did getting in it.
Hello lovelies! It has truly been awhile since Iâve posted. From here on out, I plan to begin a little writing gig. I want to try out my hand at some different tropes and will be posting here to see what content my followers respond best to, then I will post better, exclusive pieces on Patreon.Â
If you are interested in this, you can message me or contact me. Thanks!
There are so many different types of witches in todayâs society. They all practice specialized things. Modern witches sometimes use these labels to identify themselves with what they practice and others donât use them at all.
Witches that are based on the type of spells they do, also considered the path.
Green Witch
Practically the most common or heard about. These individuals specialize in plants. They do spells and divination in plants and herbs. They tend to have an infatuation with herbs and love everything about them.
Divination witch
A divination witch is a practitioner that specializes in guidance of divination. Divination is a way of the craft that appears in tarot readings, pendulum readings, wax readings, and more.
Death Witch
In short, death witchcraft is witchcraft that centers working with the dead. These witches contact the dead on a regular basis and talk to them, work with them, sometimes worship them, and more. Itâs required for death witches to have been initiated in
Sea Witch
These witches work with oceans and seas. They can be seen with a mermaid, pirate, siren type energy or have a fascination with it. If they work with deities, then it would be Poseidon if Greek and other sea gods and goddesses. They may also work with Aphrodite.Â
Cosmic Witch
These witches are amazing at astrology. They specialize in the stars, the planets, constellations, all of those things. These witches give me a vibe of someone locked away in their observatory studying the stars with a telescope and relishing in the beauty of it all.
Kitchen Witch
A kitchen witch, like my mother herself, is someone who spends most of their time in the kitchen studying what herbs and ingredients give you what. Which ones are healing, which do harm, which give you inspiration, which ones help your dopamine and serotonin, and they also specialize in nutritional health. If you need to eat a piece of goddamn pizza to help you focus, do it. Theyâre the type of witch to show up at your house with a special soup that will heal you physically.
Moving onto closed practices, there are so many and it is so crucial to a witch that they are not doing spells that are closed off to them. Closed practices are practices, paths, and spells that are not available to all witches. Generally, itâs said doing a spell within practice you are not part of will greatly anger the founders and ancestors that have long past - of that practice. These practices are closed for a reason, and they will stay that way.Â
When it comes to figuring out if you are part of a closed practice that is race-locked, itâs in your blood; the founders of that practice would be the same ethnicity as you most times. You can be raised with it like I was, or you can discover it later. The majority opinion is if you were not raised with the traditions of a certain ethnicity, you probably shouldnât engage in the traditional practice of witchcraft of that ethnicity. But, that is up to you to decide. If it is in your blood and the practice is open to you, you can learn about it and begin using the traditions in your daily life. Usually it will come naturally to you. Ancestor work is different, ancestors are something that tend to come to you and not leave because theyâre the you before you.Â
Some practices are region-locked and you must live there to practice it. Some require you to be initiated into it or converted, similar to religion. Some are religions.Â
Snippet of my upcoming book
This is just a small snippet of what working with some of the gods and goddesses and infernal beings I work with might give you if you decide to work with them too. Please do not begin working with deities until you feel you are ready to most importantly but also until you have adequate protection spells, items, or motifs around your space. This will keep you safe from tricksters.
Now, letâs begin with the one that is most present in my life,
Miss Aphrodite
Aphrodite, or Lady Aphrodite, is a very...adamant type of woman. You will absolutely know itâs her. She is extremely beautiful, and is adamant that you think so of yourself as well. Many popular media portray her as someone who thinks she is higher than you. When you approach her from a standpoint of you want to work with her not just worship her - she is above you. But she doesnât rub it in your face like media says she does. To me, she is very much like a big sister or that cool aunt. She doesnât say sheâs prettier than you especially if you struggle with self esteem. She will do her best to help you believe that you are beautiful. And if you need to compare yourself with her, tell yourself you are as beautiful as her, then so be it. Sheâll help you.
When you work with her, she likes certain things. She embodies feminism, creates it. So she likes a lot of feminine things and items that represent her or it. Roses are sacred to. Flowers are a nice offering. She likes gold, pearls, wine, expensive things. But she will be just as happy if you make something for her. She believes itâs the thought from the hand-crafted offerings that make them meaningful. She also loves brushes and combs, makeup items, perfumes. Especially if you put it on your altar and then use it so sheâs with you all day.
Apollo the sun god
Now...Apollo is hip. Heâs the âgay uncleâ you see on tiktok that pulls you out of school for fun. He is not actually gay and has no definite sexuality, by the way. Apollo is the type of god to host a dance party in your room when youâre gone because he likes it so much. But he likes dance parties with you even more. I love to joke that I would beat him in just dance, knowing full well the god that created dancing would beat me...
He love, love, loves all art and drawings of himself or his symbols. He loves getting turnt up too. But most importantly heâll relieve your art block if you ask.Â
Poseidon the god of the sea
King or Lord, he can never choose, Poseidon is...less hip. He is not like a grandpa, more like the older uncle or dad that doesnât really understand Apollo and Aphrodite. He is the god youâd meditate at the sea with, obviously. He likes more quiet activities. He would help you with your anxiety, more importantly know how to calm you down the best. In my experience, painting with him is therapeutic. I can also imagine he might be a little tired from creating the whole sea, and I tend to see him with a nice cup of coffee constantly.
Loki, mr trickster
No, not marvel Loki. The redhead mischievous guy you tend to see around. Thatâs him. As you might be able to tell, I love Loki. He has been such a wonderful experience for me. The first time he was in my space, he startled me with a toy lobster. So that gives you a little glimpse of what heâs like.
For offerings, he loves anything green. He loves the offerings that you find out in the world that remind you of him. He loves handmade offerings more than bought ones. He also loves dinosaur nuggets and chocolate milk. He loves snaked and spiders, and will fill your day with little mischievous acts.
The lovely Lucifer
Lord Lucifer is a fallen angel. He does not have time to mess around, but then again...sometimes he does. He loves feathers, cinnamon things, red, white, and purple colors. He is a newer deity, and I donât have much on his personality when it comes to conversating with me. When I talk to him more, I will update more on what he likes depending on what he tells me.
Now...this post comes to an end. Thank you for reading and make sure to follow me if you would like more content like this. Or dont, I canât make you.
I also do readings, message me if you are interested. They are 2 dollars per card and I take cashapp.
Your hair is the protector of your crown. Itâs important to nourish your scalp to improve your hair quality and allow your mindset to be clear. You can cleanse yourself just by getting in the shower and visualizing all of the negative energy melting off your body and all the bad thoughts melting from your mind. By doing this, you can help yourself feel more at peace.
If you work or worship Aphrodite or other deities that relish in beauty, you can wash your hair as an offering or wash your hair with products based on Aphrodite or the deitiesâ name as a devotional act. You can make the products, most easily with scents. Scents they love or are sacred to them.
Recognizing your hair texture
If you have straight hair, you will have straight strands when itâs wet and it will not hold a curl whatsoever without heat. If you have curly hair, or wavy hair it will hold a curl even if itâs slight when itâs wet.Â
Now on to the physical tips
-Wash your scalp with shampoo, and your tips with conditioner.
-Towel dry and then air or blow dry. Blow drying can damage hair if done too much.
-Most curlers take up to 12 hours to dry, depending on the thickness of your hair and the amount of curlers used.
-Donât ever go to sleep with wet hair
-Brush your hair gently when itâs wet. Donât always brush when dry, as it may puff up.
Now onto skin.
Your skin, which itâs most likely known to you, itâs the biggest living organism in your body. And it protects each and every chakra. It protects your muscle, and is an outer layer of protection for your intestines and internal systems.
You can cleanse your skin the same way as your hair, get in the shower and visualize the water washing away the bad energy.Â
As for the physical tips,Â
-Wash your skin with a body wash that doesnât irritate your skin.
-Use washes for designated body parts.
-Pay attention to the oily-ness or the dryness on your face. Buy corresponding face washes.
-After you get out of the shower, or even when you go swimming, put lotion on. It doesnât matter the amount of melanin in your skin, that wonât affect it. Water dries out your skin, itâs important to put lotion on.
As for the nails,
Your nails are the conductors of your energy. They have energy flowing through them constantly. Whether youâre expelling energy or receiving it. So when you get to your home or bedroom where itâs energy your nails are used to, itâs important to manicure them at that time.
For the physical tips
-Clean underneath your nails gently.
-Donât pick at them. Donât rip them off. If this is a habit of yours, then itâs important to get a substitute for it,
-Clip your nails to trim them, donât rip them.
-File them to the shape youâd like. Also file them to get rid of sharp edges.
Thatâs all for today. Thank you for taking the time to read this and please follow if youâd like to see more like this, or suggest something.Â
I do readings, to book one please message me. They are 2 dollars per card. I take cashapp only.
