Lav-Gui @thatlavendergui - Tumblr Blog

You never take me to cookladesh,

You never bang me open with your sausage flame ✋😔

💔🥀

Life update coz I refuse to actually talk to people teehee.

Just spoke to my parents’ therapist and she says there is a high chance I am depressed.

“How high?” You may ask, and I asked the same thing as a joke. She did NAWT find it funny and she is gonna recommend my parents take me to a psychiatrist 🤭🤭🤭

Also yes, both of my parents’ therapist, but not like couples counselling, more like getting them to be okay with me being trans type of therapist 🥳🎊😄🫶🎉👍

#transmasc #nonbinary #trans

TW: RANTING

At my bf’s friends bday party and I found a corner to hide in-

like don’t get me wrong the music is fire, and I ADORE dancing…

But I just lowkey feel like absolute jack shit…

And I wie I could interact more w my bf- mostly coz he is the one person I know extensively, like I do know other people, but like because of my bf-

He is an extrovert big time and has spent the night talking to everybody-

I’ve just been feeling like shit all the time lately, and I just kinda wanted to be with him more…

Idk-

Sorry…

#mini rant

TW: SH mentions/ Vent

I would heavily recommend not to read, and I’m mostly doing this coz I’m just so tired of keeping everything in…

And because this doesn’t have any real info about me, so people won’t know it’s me.

I was just watching Ginny & Georgia. Season 2.

That moment when Georgia reads Ginny’s therapy journal and realises she has been burning herself.

Ginny got a hug-

I got yelled at, my door taken away, not fucking privacy, my phone of the time taken away. I get scolded and she gets a hug-

I got blamed for trying to manipulate my mom with my sh for something I was ACTIVELY trying to keep from my parents and she gets a hug…

A hug and a mom saying “I wish I could’ve been there for you”

And I get yelled at, or it gets ignored.

Or my mom blows up at me like when I was 10 and ends up telling me something that keeps me up at night to this day. I am 20. Not a single fucking DAY goes by that her words don’t run around rent free in my head.

“If you are gonna kys you better cut yourself in little pieces so I won’t have to deal with that later!”

I was fucking ten-

And Ginny gets a fucking hug…

thememedaddy

#I CANNOT pay attention without subtitles- they help me understand shit. sometimes English is too English for my ass

Any other transmascs on the boy juice gotta deal with the standing curse?

Like every time after my t-stabbings I get the standing curse.

Sitting is fine enough. Walking is the best option…

But standing? Imma die

#transmasc #trans #testosterone #FtNB

Just had some of a pineapple based hot sauce that the mom of one of my moms Mexican coworkers made. And ts is very awesome sauce. But why tf am I farting sweet now- Hello?-

#pineapple hot sauce

Having given myself what is essentially an ed at like 15 is so weird. Coz now I not only cannot bear the idea of not being vegetarian. But I also have days in which I cannot bear the idea of eating at all. Sometimes for reasons. But today I just woke up and my brain was like: “yeah you aren’t eating today, tough luck”

#ed #vegetarian

I feel like that movie traumatised me-

But like in a neutral way-

Like I was gonna say it traumatised me in a good way, but idk…

I mean it didn’t traumatise me in a bad way

I feel like it changed something, I don’t know what it is yet tho.

Also I feel like the movie had no actual resolution, but at the same time it did? And like it didn’t end but it’s over-

I have no idea, I’m confused and there’s a new feeling it my chest-