Infinite Realities

God's Mistake or The Redeemer (NSFW)

[yanderedad-deactivated20200508]

Hey dad I’m super fuckin STRESSED and I just wanna hug John smh why can’t he be real

“Come here dearest, my arms are wide open, ready for you and you alone. Ahh…I’ll never quite get use to how perfectly you fit into me, just like the missing piece to my puzzle. What stresses you my dear? Tell me everything, I want to know, no, I need to know, so I may help you. You’re mine, and I am yours, and it is my duty to care for you. Is it work? I’m sure I can pull some strings for you, although I don’t understand why you’d want to work when you have me to provide for you instead. Or is something else responsible for worrying that pretty little head of yours? Is it someone else? There is nothing I wouldn’t do for you darling - I’ll purge those sinners just for you.”

[noseedisvalid]

Maybe if i cover myself with febreze jacob can't find me

you FOOL. he’d be instantly aroused to this strange new scent!!! the ABSENCE of dank sock would alert your presence. FUCKING THINK

[farcry5selizabethdewitt]

OOC: I thought this said

Maybe if I cover myself in furbies Jacob can’t find me

[noseedisvalid]

The reality of pairing Jacob Seed, aged 47, w/ your hot, young Junior Deputies:

[noseedisvalid]

[farcry5selizabethdewitt]

Jacob: “This is one of the many trick questions on the mental exams I give up at, the former, Grand View Hotel.” Weaker men give that (never make love) answer and are immediately culled. “I love Elizabeth and I’m not fucking scared to admit I make love to Elizabeth.” Isn’t even going to comment on the Erectile Dysfunction rumors because his PTSD initially caused the very real condition; he forged touching his penis inappropriately for so long. Time passed and it became just a part of him that he preferred to ignore, after his libido suicided due to the repercussions of his PTSD. There was a lot he had to deal with when his sexuality reawakened, which was the same time he met his sweetheart.

When he met Elizabeth a flip was switched and his sex drive resurrected itself,  coming back supercharged. And, oddly enough, researchers within the scientific community over the years have been trying to explain why a small demographic of soldiers with PTSD can suddenly become hornier than John Seed. But, there’s really no definite answer for it. 

“I’ve never had a complaint.” Looks to Elizabeth who is 3 months pregnant with his child. “Doesn’t mean I don’t know how to rutt. It’s just, Lady Seed over there isn’t always in the rutting mood. And I know when to choose my battles.” 

[a-villains-refuge]

Visit Original Link

Some more Jacob lines from arcade :D my favorites are some of the early ones :)

The event really helped with my motivation to do this :3 

[annmarcus63]

Connor: Lieutenant, It’s highly important for you to stop drinking. Alcohol may cause you liver malfunction or…

Hank: 

[farcry5selizabethdewitt]

The Deputy Kills Joseph Seed (Parody)

The Deputy: shoots Joseph in the head first chance he/she “Yeeeeeah, headshot! That’s how you’re supposed to do it!”

Joseph Seed: Isn’t wearing a shirt

The Deputy: “I’m sorry your cult survived for five years. But, you weren’t wearing a shirt…so…I guess you got way too comfortable with the way things were.”  Elizabeth:  The Deputy: “LOOK, if you’re running around half-naked, you’ve gotten far too comfortable with something….I’m just saying.” 

[farcry5selizabethdewitt]

CursedImage™️

[farcry5selizabethdewitt]

[farcry5selizabethdewitt]

[farcry5selizabethdewitt]

CursedImage™️

[farcry5selizabethdewitt]

The Deputy Kills Joseph Seed (Parody)

The Deputy: shoots Joseph in the head first chance he/she “Yeeeeeah, headshot! That’s how you're supposed to do it!”

Joseph Seed: Isn’t wearing a shirt

The Deputy: “I’m sorry your cult survived for five years. But, you weren’t wearing a shirt...so...I guess you got way too comfortable with the way things were.”  Elizabeth:  The Deputy: “LOOK, if you’re running around half-naked, you’ve gotten far too comfortable with something....I’m just saying.” 

[cinnamonbundit]

I don’t know if this has been done but this is all I could think of during the opening scene

[opmonie]

Jacob or John anons, anywhere? 👀

[farcry5selizabethdewitt]

OOC: You and me both, sister. *referring to her hashtags*

[montynvarro-deactivated20211022]

small mammal is getting packed away in his carrier soon

[farcry5selizabethdewitt]

OOC: OH MY GOD! Voice of the @josephseeds-rosary is SO BEAUTIFUL! 

[farcry5selizabethdewitt]

OFFICIALLY SEARCHING FOR  PARTERS!

OOC: I never thought I’d actually post this here, but I RP on Bluemoon Roleplaying as Elizabeth Dewitt! And I figure I’d post a link to my Thread here just in case anyone is interested in taking a journey with me!? I’ve actively been searching for roleplay partners and would love to collaborate~ 

https://bluemoonroleplaying.com/community/threads/100595/

[afeverxlongingstill-archived2020]

fuck what have i made

[farcry5selizabethdewitt]

OOC: @afeverxlongingstill....I’m going to do something bad...

[farcry5selizabethdewitt]

Lucifer and Elizabeth: “Wamingo”

After having taken an interested in the “one of a kind” human (his Father’s most peculiar creature): Elizabeth. He soon discovers some of her strange animal hybrid sketches. One, in particular, catches his eye. Luci: “What the hell is this?” Elizabeth: Shocked and feels violated, he’d broken into her bedroom and found her sketchbook. Answers his question after complaining “....It’s a whale with pink flamingo wings. I call it a Wamingo.”   Luci: Stares at the sketch “It’s grotesque....” pauses, shifting to look at her with a devilish smile. “I love it~ <3″