6$ SRIMP SPECIAL!!!!!!!!!!

ZIGI • she/her • silliness interpreter

[sexygaywizard]

[kosmogrl]

[sweatermuppet]

[sitting completely still in my own bed] this world is gutting me like a fish

[mapsontheweb]

What Pedestrians Look Like Across Europe

[thotticus-binch]

[reallyreallyreallytrying]

whenever one of my buddies gets some new garb we stand around chanting "don it. don it. don it" until he dons the garb

[fartgasm]

[catgirlcadaver-deactivated20241]

don’t be scared to ask that person out. the worst they could do is say ‘no’ and then begin attacking you with their bare hands, ripping the skin off your face and tearing out chunks off flesh from your arms and disemboweling you

[fartgasm]

best case scenario

[eepybubble]

only thing that stands between me and going to bed is the entire internet that fits in the palm of my hand

[ireonic]

doing normal stuff while listening to metal is so funny because I'm eating cereal and this guy is screaming at me

[kushblazer666]

[fartgasm]

i want to be fighting for my life to get milk. i want to face booby traps, near misses from hidden dart launchers, careful steps to avoid falling into a cavernous pit. i want to just barely make it to the milk isle alive, only to seize the jug and hear a low grumble in the distance. i want to run for my life through the crumbling grocery store as an obscenely large boulder chases me to the exit. i want to reach my hand through the closing automatic doors, straining to retrieve my garfield beanie from inevitable loss. i want the satisfaction of fleeing the store, jug in grip, and beanie on head. only to find out that the boulder can trigger the automatic doors, rushing through them and crushing me instantly.

[rars]

hrghh another long and difficult day... TUMBLR!! fetch me a photo of The Fictional Character .....

[fartgasm]

these days i feel like i’m an old dvd player trying to eject a disk. it looks and sounds exhausted.

mmmn!….(insert disc)…..mmmmnn.

[fartgasm]

fanfiction is wild. i just read a 100,000+ word unfinished fanfic about a machine learning to love all in one sitting like it was nothing. and yet god forbid i read a menu without getting fed up

[fartgasm]

terrible news, im watching bojack horseman again

[roseofithaca]

Robin was just lucky that Mary was no longer around to be in earshot of him calling himself a "bad boy" to Pat because she'd have laughed her arse off.

Mary: Tosh and flaps, you are but a soft pup! Only yesterday you did cry like a babe when watching This Morning!

Robin: Old woman get scammed by her mechanic! 🥺

[fartgasm]

i don’t know who i am anymore. i’ve been through more phases than i can count and now i’ve reached a stand still. i think my personality and way of life thrives and exceeds through hyperfixations, but that’s just the thing: i don’t think i am anything if not for those hyperfixations. i don’t know what kind of person i am without the influence of a fleeting obsession. that used to be okay, but i’m an adult now.

[the-20th-century-girl]

[fartgasm]

when i die, i want this fucker to read out my eulogy