hello little gay people in my phone (or in this case, on my computer)
I'm fatowlsdotjpeg, or birdie, if you don't feel like typing it out! If you are here from my AO3 or have simply been stalking the Luca Haas tag, welcome my wonderful children. Now, for a little update on Team Players (my current WIP fic)
I've recently escaped from the lab and have quite a bit of time to be working on my fic, so there will be SEVERAL updates in the coming days, get excited. If you ever have questions, suggestions, fun anecdotes, this is where to reach me!! I love and adore talking to people so never be afraid to drop an ask! I'm a chronic yapper. If you're here from my ao3 let me know so I can say hello! connect those dots.
since were talking about the fic, drop me an ask and tell me what you want to see included!! I am nothing if not just a fanservice writer. Tell me what Situations you want me to put that boy in, your wish is my command.
Hi! Sorry if this is a weird first ask to send someone but your initial exmormon Hayden post (so many correct options btw) got in my brain and I ended up writing a little fic on the topic! It draws really heavily from your post and comments so I was going to link it in the author notes but I wanted to check first! Is that cool with you?
FRITTERLITTER!!!! GIVE ME THE FANFICTION, AND MY LIFE! IS YOURS!!!!!!
sometimes i forget that you guys don't know me fully and personally. i'm acidentally reverse parasocial. i love when people comment on my posts or fics like "not to be parasocial but ur wonderful" no such thing. i'm not a celebrity im ur friend from tumblr. i'd tell you my social security number if i could remember it
They move in together full time and Ilya notices that Anya acts differently with Shane than she does with him, more quiet and less playful, and he worries that means she doesn’t like Shane or is jealous, so he hires a dog trainer to come over and see if there’s anything they need to do to help
After a while of talking about how Anya acts the trainer says there’s nothing to worry about, Anya likes Shane just fine, it’s just that she sees him as the boss and is acting accordingly
And Ilya is like. But. I’m the one who adopted her? And raised her before Shane got here?? And the trainer is just like yeah well she sees you more like an equal. And Ilya is like WAIT she thinks Shane is in charge of both of us?? And the trainer is just like well do you interact in a way that would make her think that?
Ilya’s life flashes before his eyes as he thinks of all the times Shane has come over with a snack for Ilya and a treat for Anya, or all the times Shane has announced they’re all going for an after dinner walk, or pets Ilya’s hair and tells him he did a good job at practice, or the fact that he uses the same warning tone with Anya when she misbehaves as he does with Ilya when he’s causing problems on purpose
Shane comes home to Ilya with his face in his hands going oh god I’m not Anya’s dad I’m her brother and she thinks we’re both your pets. And Shane just goes. What.
"hollanov lesbians would be this" "hollanov lesbian would be that" i need to tell you that spiritually hollanov lesbians and a gender flipped heated rivalry would need to be two different things. if HR was gender flipped then jane hollander and lilya rozanov would in fact be their own distinct characters. if ILYA rozanov was a lesbian he would be a fat, mean femme and SHANE hollander would be a weird little butch. i don't know if this makes any sense but i need to know if you understand me
Luca Haas in my mind defintely wore makeup when he was living in switzeralnd for going out and such and stopped at first when he got to ottawa but he defintely started doing it again (i'm mostly thinking eyeliner but like other things as well) and whatever boyfriend you headcanon him having dies every time he sees Luca wearing makeup, luca wearing eyeliner, one bc he finds it hot and two its a sign that luca is comfortable where he is and comfortable with the people around him to not care that hes wearing makeup
mack DELIGHTS in luca wearing makeup and thinks it's adorable. mack will also occasionally wear makeup!! esp since he's on camera some. pippa thinks makeup is the devil because her mama had her wearing a full face to church at twelve because she is a southern baptist and pippa HATED having to wear it. she loves that the guys love it but she will run away if they try to put eyeliner on her. one time she threw the cat at luca when he offered to do her mascara. luca despairs about this bc she has great eyelashes but they're red so they aren't super visible without makeup so NO ONE UNDERSTANDS!!! why he's so jealous of her lashes.
i promise i swear the next chapter of team players will be out soon. it's just that my mother is getting married and it's hard to balance maid of honor duties with writing pornography but by god am i trying
just had an idea for a role play blog except it's me roleplaying Your Strange Uncle (not strange as in like "oh ew weird creepy " i mean strange as in truly fucking baffling) and all i do is post fundamentally unhinged takes that manage to be kind of bad but in different, unforeseen ways. they are somehow woke but also wrong.
my first one was "if you are doing at "strangers" fantasy with your partner, as a man you are cheating. because women's minds can create separate fantasy spaces but men cannot fantasize. so they're cheating"
just had an idea for a role play blog except it's me roleplaying Your Strange Uncle (not strange as in like "oh ew weird creepy " i mean strange as in truly fucking baffling) and all i do is post fundamentally unhinged takes that manage to be kind of bad but in different, unforeseen ways. they are somehow woke but also wrong.
my first one was "if you are doing at "strangers" fantasy with your partner, as a man you are cheating. because women's minds can create separate fantasy spaces but men cannot fantasize. so they're cheating"
high as fuck in the group chat talking about "look at this post that made me laugh and also when was the last time you thought about your first queer heartbreak through the lens of an adult, a queer adult who knows just how difficult a queer young life can be." @alecsalamander @lasagna482 @owldork1998
Carter Vaughn ray of sunshine owns no less than four rats. he’s a rat guy. he’s playing call of duty and there’s a rat asleep on his shoulder. he’s calling his lesbian sister and complaining because she asks how the rats are before she asks about him. He’s jogging in Central Park and there’s a rat in his pocket. none of this means anything but it gives me joy
ok another question bc i cannot resist! whats the freakiest headcanon youve come up with for mack and luca? and the freakiest for pippa??
ok ok ok this is gonna go BELOW the cut hehehe
ok so for mack and luca. i have. like a list that is so extensive. however i don't want to do any spoilers? but also like, i was telling @owldork1998 about my hc's about both of them liking high sex, and also about luca being a bit dominating, because yeah. fucking of course he is. i would love to expand on this if yall would wish however it was a RANT so i shall only bombard ur timeline if you request it of me
for pippa, i don't want to really spoil any of my plans, but if yall are loyal Flock Members, you'll remember my posts about June, the WHL goalie for the ottawa satyrs that pippa hooks up with. Pippa is JOKINGLY (they're freaks but not like that, really) in junes phone as "mommy". one day a few of the cens players are getting drinks with a few of the satyrs players and june is there and they're all chatting and shooting the shit and june is bullying wyatt for being old (he's not old, just older than her) and the others all start tsking her for not respecting her elders and they're all giggling at the table and june sneaks in a few more jabs and wyatt eventually grabs her phone (unlocked on the table. because june is, at heart, a fucking moron) and goes "that's it young lady i'm calling your parents"
and june is laughing as wyatt opens her contacts and isn't looking at the phone really she's too busy giggling with everyone else until she hears wyatt put the ringer on speaker and she turns around and, still laughing, goes "are you actually calling my parents?"
and wyatt responds with "i'm calling ur mother"
and june is confused because she's like "i have??? two dads???? who the fuck are you calling??" and wyatt is like "uhh the contact for your mom?" and he flips the phone to show the table and the contact says "mommy" and june is like "oh no" and her team is confused at first bc like they know june does not have? a mom? what? and so are the cens because huh? and june is like "i hope there's a sinkhole" and before it can really dawn on anyone what this actually might be, the phone, STILL on speaker, is ANSWERED and FUCK june is going to jump.
because pippa's accent is fucking unmistakeable. and she's teasing her through the line, because she's picking up from the text convo they were having, because they had been texting RIGHT before about june coming over, and that was why she had been at the top of her messages, and fucking christ oh my god.
"would you have a little patience you horny motherfucker, im trying to finish working on something-" Pippas accent is drawling and sweet and a little raspy and now june is embarrassed and also horny. Wyatt quickly hangs up the phone. june is blushing a shade that would cause most people to worry about blood flow to the rest of her body. her satyrs teammates are looking at her with a mix of glee and pride. the cens look. a mixture of scared and shocked. june wants to die. pippa finds out and nearly passes out for laughing so hard
"i was born in the wrong time period." i wasn't. i was meant to be here right now. in this moment, i am perfectly aligned with what i was born to do, which is nothing. humanity has developed this incredible ability to hope, and so there is no pre determination. we are all infinitely possible, and by chance, you are here again now, somewhere along in the carbon cycle, perfectly timed. also i love vaping and lesbian pornography, which are much more accessible now than they would have been in the 1920's
Until 30 years ago, there was no treatment for multiple sclerosis. There was symptom management and steroids. The disease modifying treatment I’m on was approved 22 years ago. Considering I’ve had multiple neurologists tell me how aggressive my disease is, I don’t know where I’d be without it.
Whenever people bring up their hypothetical zombie apocalypse plans, I always say I’ll just find the closest ocean and walk into it, because the thought of living without my treatment or meds doesn’t seem like a life I want to live. Hell, I was discussing going on stem cell therapy, which would mean going off the Tysabri for 6 months and even 6 months seemed awful.
So yeah, pretty happy to be alive at this point of history.
sometimes you make a shitpost about vaping and someone makes an addition that reminds you of just how vibrant the lives we lead can be. just how far we've come. and how incredible it is that, so many people who we would have lost in the past, are still here now. because with the time we've been given, we have chosen to fight for more, and for each other. i'm so glad you're here. i imagine, if there's a way to do so, those who lived before us look upon us like proud parents thinking, look. look at them, so full of life. they've done it.
what an incredible thing. i'm so happy i get to share this time period with you, and with everyone. when else would we share powerful stories on shitposts about vaping.