be the light.

33//she/her//Anglican//cat mum//high school English teacher//Bunurong country, Australia ✌️🌊💕

[favour-andgrace]

so I've been given a year 10 history (ww2 and the civil rights movement) elective for semester 2 & while I'm very excited to finally be teaching a humanities subject that I actually feel confident about, the reality is also starting to set in:

the subject starts next week

I've never taught history above year 8

as of this year, our school is making every subject (and each unit within each subject) do these unit planners in a very specific way - and the subject hasn't run since 2024, so I'll need to make them from scratch

also as of this year, year 10s also have to complete compulsory coursework tasks as part of their assessment, rather than just having one big test at the end of each unit, meaning I'll need to put all that together

I need to read through the victorian curriculum for year 10 history (which also updated in 2025!) so I know what I have to cover

and the subject needs at least 2 major assessment tasks to go on the kids' end-of-year reports

oh, and meanwhile, I've also got year 10 english exams to mark, semester 1 reports to write, and then I'll have year 8 english & humanities assessments to mark from the end of this week. and then I also have to make sure that all my year 10s - both economics & english students - have done everything they needed to do to get an S for those subjects. and then speak to them & their parents if they haven't.

did I mention that I have a week to do all this??

[favour-andgrace]

made the mistake of checking work emails outside of school hours & now I'm Stressed

[favour-andgrace]

also, I'm considering going back on the dating apps again, but I only want to use photos taken post-breakup, and so far I only have 4 - and I want them to be cute candids of me out in the world, rather than carefully curated selfies, so I'll just have to wait until I have a couple more before I try dating again. (because heaven knows I'm not meeting anyone in real life!)

[favour-andgrace]

work feels yuck & weird & I'm dreading going lately?? and my classes are actually good this year?? so idk why I feel this way??

[natureandbeauty]

[favour-andgrace]

after being stuck at home with a cold for the past 4 days, I have come to the conclusion that:

I am Very annoying and needy

I don't know how to stop being annoying and needy

at age 34, I don't really feel like this is the kind of thing I can/should be posting on the internet, or telling my friends about, but it bothers me & I feel like I'm trapped inside my own head

[favour-andgrace]

so, some additional things I learned (or was reminded of):

you really are never too much for the right people

Internalised Ableism

I need to chill out & give myself some grace, especially while I'm sick & temporarily off ritalin! (got to get that new script sorted ugh)

I'm doing better than I think

there are people who love me just as I am. not everyone has to.

[golden-autumn]

[baltering]

[favour-andgrace]

also, I just tried black winged eyeliner again for the first time in literally years & it still slaps!!

[simena]

Luigi Rossi - Primavera (detail)

[were--ralph]

Hey! how make much did you make an hr on your first job and what was the job?

[favour-andgrace]

after being stuck at home with a cold for the past 4 days, I have come to the conclusion that:

I am Very annoying and needy

I don't know how to stop being annoying and needy

at age 34, I don't really feel like this is the kind of thing I can/should be posting on the internet, or telling my friends about, but it bothers me & I feel like I'm trapped inside my own head

[favour-andgrace]

help I've had a sore back all day (slept weirdly?? knitting too intensely?? too many baby cuddles yesterday??) & I also had to drive a bit today, which I'm pretty sure only made things worse, and now I can barely move

[pemberlian]

The definitive Fitzwilliam Darcy eyeroll gif set. In chronological order.

[goth-queen]

[overclassy]

[favour-andgrace]

also, in case you were wondering how my school holidays are going, here's what I've done so far:

gotten into knitting; I'd had this beginner's kit to make a cardigan since last winter & I've finally started on it! I've now done the back, one of the front panels, and am halfway through the second front panel. it's big wool, big needles, and an easy pattern (because I really am a beginner!) - and I've been at it for hours at a time - so I'm racing through it!

yesterday I caught up with a friend for the first time in months & got to meet & cuddle her baby daughter!! she's actually the sweetest little girl & at 7 weeks old, she's babbling & smiling & looking around so intently at everything. I wish I got a photo, but trust & believe that she was completely adorable.

spending a LOT of time with family & friends. in fact, I'm heading off to a family birthday in just under 2 hours! and then next week, I'll be seeing friends for their 30th and 40th birthdays respectively.

lots & lots of cat cuddles!! honey is loving life right now!!

with the temperature suddenly dropping & autumn really setting in, I'm spending a lot of time curled up all cosy inside. (hence the knitting)

ploughing through my tbr list. currently on the throne of glass series by sarah j maas; I've read all the acotar books & am of course eagerly awaiting the release of the next one in october, but apparently there are cross overs in the throne of glass & crescent city serieses that will help the next acotar book make sense?? so I'm getting through those??

playing my nintendo switch - lots of animal crossing, plus with the n64 online thing, I've been going back to banjo kazooie & banjo tooie over & over.

next week, in between seeing friends etc, I'll also be getting onto work that I need to do for term 2, but that's what I usually do for school holidays: chill week 1, then school work week 2. I have a little bit of marking to finish from term 1, then a tonne of planning to start off term 2. oh, and I need to get my ankle x-rayed (I rolled it a bunch of times around christmas, got a referral to get an x-ray back in january, and considering it still hurts in april unless I strap it up - I should really find out what's going on!!). and I need to get my hair done too; I had it dyed blonde again like 6 months ago & haven't had it done since - thank goodness I deliberately got stretched-out roots! - but it also badly needs a trim.

next term, because the state government is still messing teachers and es staff around re. pay & conditions, there's going to be a bunch more strike action - not a massive march like we did the other day, but a series of smaller actions - so that'll be interesting. I'm really feeling the pinch of losing a day's pay from the march, so I'm glad that the upcoming industrial action is more disruptive in terms of schools functioning, rather than pay being affected.

so anyway, here's a long-winded update that no one asked for! I was beginning to get burnt out towards the end of term 1, so I'm very grateful for school holidays.