America's Sweetheart

Listen buddy I'm Nic and this is my blog. Read through at your own risk. You might get offended. You might get scared. You might pee a little bit. You might even throw up. It doesn't matter. Welcome to my little slice of heaven 😎

[feeblepeon]

I wish there was more to be done

About the fact

That cartoon women are more beautiful

Than real women

[emailmore]

put all of the toothpaste from one tube inside of another tube or else the machine gun turret i installed in your head will start shooting your brain

SAW

[powerburial]

New macklemore “thrift store 2”

In the thrift shop at the hospital Found some clothes they dont need anymore Put the coat on and gain their memories

[geosynthetic]

Count Barefoot Contessa

[dorfs]

she always finds me in my time of greatest need

[captain-price-returns]

Los Angeles area gangsters fighting for Assad in Syria, 2014

I bring up this video periodically to normal people and they dont believe me

[segamascott]

[videolottery]

Humiliation victim gotta be one of the least funny gimmicks ever

[humiliationvictim]

It never ends

[sforzzz]

it's totally ok to dislike things. right?

[sforzzz]

i have to go delete some posts

[soup-mother]

Step back everyone. This post requires the delicate touch of an annoying gimmick blog

[intactics]

[showing up to the function unannounced in sunglasses and a driving hair shawl & gloves & a trenchcoat & high heels with a frantic persecuted air] no darling of course I wanted to come to your little shindig last week but I just had to get out of town, you understand [taking a long hard drag of a ridiculously thin cigarette and getting lipstick on the filter] I had a popular post going around

[chicknwire]

I love tumblr more than IG bc IG feels like I’m posting looking for a job but on here it’s like I already lost the job and my wife and the house and I’m just sitting on the curb talking to myself

[saintm0rning]

trying to impress a grinch girl by pretending i hate christmas and presents

[saintm0rning]

trying to make it work with a grinch girl but i'm unsatisfied because i have a christmas fetish

[trenchgun]

john karkat is entering kindergarten this fall

[aph-lithuania]

john karkat is entering high school this fall

[filenamedotpng]

Smurf Bible Scenes IV (2007)

"I put this up before but it disappeared, it is Gargamel from the smurfs tempting the band Audioslave in the desert with a crate of magic pineapples. It is not clear whether they will accept or not."

[unification]

*torturing you* dude trust me, something really cool happens. you just have to reflect on it for a bit. i'm doing this because i want you to reach your full potential okay?

[contemptible-scoundrel]

dude he's a pro and he's dating a noob, it's a problematic skill gap, it's not a healthy pwnage dynamic

[kushblazer666]

brits get so mad when you say that “scroffy tiggins” does not seem like an appetizing dish. they start pretending that they still live like freidrich engels is doing ethnography on them

[kushblazer666]

obviously ‘scroffy tiggins’ is not a real british dish but these are the kinds of foods that britons actually eat that i had in mind when i posted this:

bubble and squeak

stargazey pie

toad in the hole

spotted dick

neeps and tatties

rumbledethumps

cullen skink

wet nelly

and of course, i would be remiss if i didn’t mention

faggots

[kushblazer666]

person in my notes:

a picture of stargazey pie, straight off wikipedia: