𝑥anthus claiborne: carribbean blue ☆; music box ☆; between your pages ☆; saturn devouring his son. ft. audric thain ★; in bed, the kiss ☆; farewell wanderlust ★; yandere alphabet ★.
𝑧aros atha’lin: the color of pomegranates ☆; saffron awning ☆
𝑖saac rhoades: paulownias and chrysanthemums ☆; honey whiskey ★
thank you so much for stopping by my masterlist! i know there’s a lot here, so whether you scrolled through everything or just peeked at a few things, i truly appreciate you taking the time! requests are open, i’d love to write them! 💌 @dhazefawn is my main.
content warnings: my blog does touch up on mature of topics such as dark romance, stalking, emotional manipulation, “yandere” tropes and so on. i want to make clear that even in these mature works i do not romanticize these actions. genres such as dark romance do not exist in a vacuum -- i believe fiction effects reality. consent between characters is my number one priority when writing.
petitions & topics i am currently passionate about: h. d carlton’s haunting adeline movie adaptation’s harmful ideologies and the petition to stop the movie production; (2) (3).
anyways xanny smut wip 🙃🙃 coming in the next two days. clinging onto some hope before the exam results come out in august.
“He can hear us,” Xanthus hisses, a shaky breath escaping through his teeth.
“Dontis can hear you,” you push down on the back of his neck, “not me.”
Xanthus scoffs, though his voice carries no bite. Your fingers dip near the curve of his neck. The taunt muscle of his shoulders feel solid like metal under your fingertips.
You push down harder. Xanthus lets out a sound, so small you almost miss it. You open your mouth, a quip forming on your tongue. Xanthus’ hand grabs your wrist before your mind can ever register his hold. He gives you a small inviting tug. You bite at your lip, wondering if you’ve pushed too much. The thought only spurs you on; akin to fire spreading across your skin.
PEOPLE CAN YOU PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE SIGN THE PETITION TO STOP HAUNTING ADELINE FROM BECOMING A MOVIE!!!! It’ll be incredibly harmful to women in this political climate, and one movie is not worth endangering all those women because men will think women fantasize about 🍇 because of this movie! Not to mention actors who have played 🍇ists in the past, like Evan Peters in American Horror Story, said it was one of the most traumatic experiences ever. Not to mention the poor actress who’s going to be portraying Adeline being subjected to such cruelty. Please stop this movie from happening! 🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏
Stop the Film Adaptation of Haunting Adeline: Abuse Should Never Be Marketed as Romance.
anyways xanny smut wip 🙃🙃 coming in the next two days. clinging onto some hope before the exam results come out in august.
“He can hear us,” Xanthus hisses, a shaky breath escaping through his teeth.
“Dontis can hear you,” you push down on the back of his neck, “not me.”
Xanthus scoffs, though his voice carries no bite. Your fingers dip near the curve of his neck. The taunt muscle of his shoulders feel solid like metal under your fingertips.
You push down harder. Xanthus lets out a sound, so small you almost miss it. You open your mouth, a quip forming on your tongue. Xanthus’ hand grabs your wrist before your mind can ever register his hold. He gives you a small inviting tug. You bite at your lip, wondering if you’ve pushed too much. The thought only spurs you on; akin to fire spreading across your skin.
anyways xanny smut wip 🙃🙃 coming in the next two days. clinging onto some hope before the exam results come out in august.
“He can hear us,” Xanthus hisses, a shaky breath escaping through his teeth.
“Dontis can hear you,” you push down on the back of his neck, “not me.”
Xanthus scoffs, though his voice carries no bite. Your fingers dip near the curve of his neck. The taunt muscle of his shoulders feel solid like metal under your fingertips.
You push down harder. Xanthus lets out a sound, so small you almost miss it. You open your mouth, a quip forming on your tongue. Xanthus’ hand grabs your wrist before your mind can ever register his hold. He gives you a small inviting tug. You bite at your lip, wondering if you’ve pushed too much. The thought only spurs you on; akin to fire spreading across your skin.
Hii again this is the same anon who asked you about yan Xanthus! Okay first off all I LOVE THE ANSWER YOU GAVE ME! That’s what I was wondering as well, so I was glad we both had the same perspective. This is a last question, i don’t know you might get tired of this questions lmao. So what will Xanthus would do if Love just started to grow cold towards him, not letting him near them or refusing his kisses, affection, touches overall Love is just so done of him and his obsession towards them.
you’re so kind ! thank you so much. i researched a bit of psychology to understand how this hypothetical situation would play out between xanthus and love and their roles as the involved parties. my answer is a bit long, so i put everything under the read more option!
Love refusing to give him any affection (physical such as kisses, touches and emotional such as words of affirmation and etc) would start later down their relationship. Xanthus’ whole psychology revolves around proving that he can and will protect Love. His self hatred is at an all time high. It is obvious from canon material such as his written letters on Saqu’s website and the last episodes that Xanthus’ carries alot of self depreciating ideas. He’s been walking a tightrope between cynicism and just barely keeping up with his façade of perfection and performance. I’d say this is more emphasised in this hypothetical “yandere” scenario.
About yanderes: They are powerfully connected to the people close to them and terrified by the possibility of losing them — yet attack those people so unexpectedly that they often ensure the very abandonment they fear. The robbing of personal freedom that Love faces is the attack. This is what pushes them to distance themselves from Xanthus.
There was another source I wanted to link but it is unfortunately not available on the internet anymore that talks about the victims of yanderes or the ones that are attracted to the thought of absolute affection and devotion. A person who has not learned emotional regulation because they didn’t have someone to treat them with the proper affection and love might mistake the yandere’s obsession with love.
While I think Love would stay with Xanthus in the beginning, they are not a person who lacks the emotional recognition to not spot the unhealthy habits Xanthus is developing. We know from canon that Love comes from a stable family. The one factor that does keep Love in denial about Xanthus is the safety he offers -- cold hands wrapped around them, promising a life away from the horrors they’ve faced from childhood to adulthood. A cocoon of conditional safety is still conditional.
Love wouldn’t be allowed to leave their “home” with Xanthus without him trailing behind. At first, he’d try to be glued to their side, but when Love rightfully asks for some space to finally explore the world around them now that they have the chance, Xanthus will relent. Well, not exactly. He’d secretly violate those boundaries. Stalking and collecting information on whatever and whoever Love interacts with.
This further pushing of boundaries could lead to Love finally stopping all shows of affection towards him. I wouldn’t paint Love as a complete saint, either. This hypothetical situation could get to a point in which Love could start forming relationships with others just to push Xanthus further down, or they could blame everything that they have gone through (Trimedian, Dontis’ death and so on) on Xanthus. As a result, this feeds the psychology Xanthus has that he just needs to protect Love better (aka keep them even more isolated) and the obsession grows. This forms a cycle of emotional abuse, with Xanthus being the one with the primary power and Love being the one showing “reactive” abuse.
The role of Xanthus feeding on Love is an interesting aspect of this question. How can Love stop showing affection to Xanthus knowing Xanthus won’t feed on them anymore? Will he find someone else as a food source? He’d despise the idea of feeding from someone else. In canon, of course I don’t see Xanthus turning Love into his primary food source. But in this scenario, Love is more than food. They’re like ichor to Xanthus, no one is equal. To feed on someone else is a betrayal. He doesn’t understand that with this line of thinking and action he’s talking more and more away from Love, basically taking away their humanity.
To get at least something from Love, he’d try to satisfy his needs off their growing hatred towards him. Xanthus would take anything from Love. He wants a reaction towards him -- any kind -- hatred, disgust would still be fine, he’ll make do with scraps (just like he did for most of his life). A kiss and a slap is still a touch at the end of the day for him. He’s selfish, satisfying his desires during arguments as Love is absolutely losing it. If they are talking to him -- yelling, screaming, insulting him -- it doesn’t matter.
Just as long Love does not leave. If they try, that’s a whole different story.
anyway, i love them so much. my tragic shaylas 😭😭😭 so glad ts didn’t happen in the canon. i love their dynamic so so much. thank you for the ask <3
OMGG Hii!! I stumbled upon your Xanthus yandere alphabet! It’s so good I love it! This is not a request! I was just curious about this yan Xanthus, well he’s already is a yan tho lol. I wanted to know your answer about this question of mine, so what if Love fell in love with someone, and that they’re slowly falling out of love with Xanthus. Now I know Xanny wouldn’t like that not one bit.🚨🚨‼️
thank you for sharing! the last week has been so hectic but i have only the history exam left on the 13th so hopefully i will be free to write more ｡◕‿◕｡ i apologize for any spelling mistakes.
The Yandere Xanthus described in my yandere alphabet is a bit different from the canon version -- he is completely off the rails. The centuries have completely rusted his moral compass and it is reflected in how he treats Love.
We’ve already established that personal freedom and privacy are gone. You’ll never truly feel by yourself because he is always next to you -- in his mind this is for your safety. The bond might skew your mind a bit -- you might think that this is just how it needs to be. He’s made a home between your ribs and mind -- he won’t leave.
Now, Love can start developing a want for something new. A friend, someone to talk to freely. It doesn’t need to be necessarily a romantic connection. To Xanthus, both platonic and romantic connections can threaten the golden cage he was put Love in. I can imagine Love growing co-dependent on this third party, seeking them out not only for their company, but for a break from how suffocating Xanthus’ “affection” is.
Xanthus will of course notice it, maybe even before Love does. The difference in how you treat him -- detached -- and how you treat this new person -- interested and affectionate, as if your whole world lights up just a tad bit around them -- destroys him. I don’t think he’ll show any violence towards you. Though, his manipulative tendencies will heighten. Suddenly you’re reminded by him of the dangers out in the world -- outside your home (or cage). The Trimedian, the hunters, traitors. What if this third party is using you? What if they want you to turn against Xanthus? Hasn’t he given so much to you and your safety? All he has done -- even if you don’t understand why -- there is a point to it all.
He’ll try to discredit everything this third party can do for you. Suddenly he’s in competition with this person. In his mind, he’s trying to show you that he’s perfect for you. But what Xanthus does not understand is that you’re tired of the perfect-ness. You don’t want to live in a porcelain world anymore -- you want out. The idea that you can like this third person who may be imperfect in his eyes, angers him to no end. He doesn’t understand that you can like the cracks in someone’s facade. Love in this moment is searching for something real and this third person could give them that -- an out to the real world.
You’ll see stages of his mental decline here.
The first stage is in which he tries to impress you more, show that he’s perfect for you, that no one else can give you what you need and want. His affection will become even more prominent but you’ll have these moments where he might take you outside on your own and when he might give you a moment of freedom, but you’re still on a “leash.”
The second stage is him actually showing his violence. Xanthus will not harm you, not yell at you, his anger will not be pointed towards you. But he will hurt the person you’re in love with. It starts out small. Maybe this person is having trouble in their lives -- financial, connection-wise with anyone else, he will ruin their relationships with other people. He will mentally try to break this person, and if that does not work he will physically hurt them.
In my yandere alphabet I do mention that love can bring a third party and give them affection either to just piss xanthus off or to just give themselves a moment of gratification. Xanthus will kill them if they’re someone who you fully haven’t formed a relationship with, but if they are someone you care about Xanthus will slowly chip away at them and t*rture them basically until you just give it up.
He will manipulate Love into thinking that they’re the one in control of the situation. That they just have to tell him to stop, but they just need to stop seeing this person, and he’ll have mercy. (A lie. The person will still be k*lled. You won’t see them again. He might use this against you also -- forming a narrative in which he poisons your mind, telling you that this person abandoned you.)
At the end, he’ll tell Love that this was necessary protect what they have -- the bond -- to keep it growing and flourishing. It’s a tactic to keep Love alone and isolated. The only way Love can never escape Xanthus is through d*ath or finding someone strong enough to beat him. The idea that someone can be better than him, that someone can give Love what they need -- is horrid to Xanthus.
In short, this could be just another person who Xanthus gets rid of to keep you with him or it can be someone who you can use to free yourself. The duality is not only risky for you but for Xanthus as well.
OMGG Hii!! I stumbled upon your Xanthus yandere alphabet! It’s so good I love it! This is not a request! I was just curious about this yan Xanthus, well he’s already is a yan tho lol. I wanted to know your answer about this question of mine, so what if Love fell in love with someone, and that they’re slowly falling out of love with Xanthus. Now I know Xanny wouldn’t like that not one bit.🚨🚨‼️
thank you for sharing! the last week has been so hectic but i have only the history exam left on the 13th so hopefully i will be free to write more ｡◕‿◕｡ i apologize for any spelling mistakes.
The Yandere Xanthus described in my yandere alphabet is a bit different from the canon version -- he is completely off the rails. The centuries have completely rusted his moral compass and it is reflected in how he treats Love.
We’ve already established that personal freedom and privacy are gone. You’ll never truly feel by yourself because he is always next to you -- in his mind this is for your safety. The bond might skew your mind a bit -- you might think that this is just how it needs to be. He’s made a home between your ribs and mind -- he won’t leave.
Now, Love can start developing a want for something new. A friend, someone to talk to freely. It doesn’t need to be necessarily a romantic connection. To Xanthus, both platonic and romantic connections can threaten the golden cage he was put Love in. I can imagine Love growing co-dependent on this third party, seeking them out not only for their company, but for a break from how suffocating Xanthus’ “affection” is.
Xanthus will of course notice it, maybe even before Love does. The difference in how you treat him -- detached -- and how you treat this new person -- interested and affectionate, as if your whole world lights up just a tad bit around them -- destroys him. I don’t think he’ll show any violence towards you. Though, his manipulative tendencies will heighten. Suddenly you’re reminded by him of the dangers out in the world -- outside your home (or cage). The Trimedian, the hunters, traitors. What if this third party is using you? What if they want you to turn against Xanthus? Hasn’t he given so much to you and your safety? All he has done -- even if you don’t understand why -- there is a point to it all.
He’ll try to discredit everything this third party can do for you. Suddenly he’s in competition with this person. In his mind, he’s trying to show you that he’s perfect for you. But what Xanthus does not understand is that you’re tired of the perfect-ness. You don’t want to live in a porcelain world anymore -- you want out. The idea that you can like this third person who may be imperfect in his eyes, angers him to no end. He doesn’t understand that you can like the cracks in someone’s facade. Love in this moment is searching for something real and this third person could give them that -- an out to the real world.
You’ll see stages of his mental decline here.
The first stage is in which he tries to impress you more, show that he’s perfect for you, that no one else can give you what you need and want. His affection will become even more prominent but you’ll have these moments where he might take you outside on your own and when he might give you a moment of freedom, but you’re still on a “leash.”
The second stage is him actually showing his violence. Xanthus will not harm you, not yell at you, his anger will not be pointed towards you. But he will hurt the person you’re in love with. It starts out small. Maybe this person is having trouble in their lives -- financial, connection-wise with anyone else, he will ruin their relationships with other people. He will mentally try to break this person, and if that does not work he will physically hurt them.
In my yandere alphabet I do mention that love can bring a third party and give them affection either to just piss xanthus off or to just give themselves a moment of gratification. Xanthus will kill them if they’re someone who you fully haven’t formed a relationship with, but if they are someone you care about Xanthus will slowly chip away at them and t*rture them basically until you just give it up.
He will manipulate Love into thinking that they’re the one in control of the situation. That they just have to tell him to stop, but they just need to stop seeing this person, and he’ll have mercy. (A lie. The person will still be k*lled. You won’t see them again. He might use this against you also -- forming a narrative in which he poisons your mind, telling you that this person abandoned you.)
At the end, he’ll tell Love that this was necessary protect what they have -- the bond -- to keep it growing and flourishing. It’s a tactic to keep Love alone and isolated. The only way Love can never escape Xanthus is through d*ath or finding someone strong enough to beat him. The idea that someone can be better than him, that someone can give Love what they need -- is horrid to Xanthus.
In short, this could be just another person who Xanthus gets rid of to keep you with him or it can be someone who you can use to free yourself. The duality is not only risky for you but for Xanthus as well.
little update! from 3-14 july i’ll probably be updating a bit slowly. national exams are coming up and i want to spend these days completely free. i see the requests sent in, i will definitely write them when i am done with my exams<3!!! thank you again for all the support on my fics. i wholeheartedly love this fandom so so much
A/N: !!1!1 random disclaimer !!1!1!1 in canon, it has been made clear that xanthus- and any other saquverse characters- would never physically harm their listener characters, even if emotional harm occurs. this is purely a hypothetical exploration: a “what if” scenario where xanthus is pushed past the brink. this is not a reflection of canon dynamics, nor is it meant to romanticize abuse. it’s a dark study of how love can become control when fear and desperation take over.
Affection: How do they show their love and affection? How intense would it get?
Xanthus’s presence is suffocating. Every small gesture that in the past you could have viewed as him being sweet or playful has changed. He’s always next to you- brushing your hair out of your face, adjusting your clothes (collar, shoes, etc), leaving small gifts (jewelry embedded with his blood, expensive clothing, and so on).
^^ The bracelet he gave Love in episode 3, in my mind, was not only crafted with the idea to protect them. This is the early stage of his affection turning into “branding”; he wants his scent & mark to be always carried by you.
The intensity is overwhelming. His presence is suffocating in its tenderness. He doesn’t just love you; he worships you. You are the extension of himself, body and soul. In his mind, you are him but made holier and greater than he can ever be. This obsession is bigger than his love- and, unfortunately, you cannot truly love someone you put on a pedestal.
Blood: How messy are they willing to get when it comes to their darling?
Blood is of no consequence to Xanthus. He’s lived for centuries and bled himself while taking the lives of others. While his past haunts him because of his actions, the idea of spilling blood for you frames his violence in a different light. He can justify it not only to himself but to you- he has to do this to protect you.
^^ Let’s not forget he killed Love’s coworker and feels no smidge of guilt for it. In a way, he’s right- he was protecting you, watching you, making sure no one hurt you. Though he never mentioned how it was still a violation of privacy at such an early stage of the relationship.
Xanthus will cross any line just to keep you next to him.
Cruelty: How would they treat their darling once abducted? Would they mock them?
Xanthus is cruel, yes. But never to you. Love is exempt from his detached and cruel demeanor, even at the beginning of the relationship.
He would never mock you. It serves no purpose to him. Xanthus isn’t trying to break down your confidence to make you more amiable.
His cruelty is the cruelest kind- it’s kindness. He’ll hold you when you cry, apologize for making you cry, and then remind you that you’re safer here, with him, where he can protect you. He’ll never raise his voice or insult you. He’ll simply refuse to let you go, and he’ll do it with such heartbreaking sincerity that you start to doubt your own will to leave.
Darling: Aside from abduction, would they do anything against their darling’s will?
Depends on where we are in the stages of the relationship.
In the beginning, before showing himself to Love, he’s always watching. Your schedule is something that is imperative for him to know.
^^ From episode 2, we know Xanthus has broken into Love’s home multiple times. He has this uncontrollable urge to know you inside out. Also, I’d like to note a piece of written lore from Saqu’s site that further shows how Xanthus watches Love: “The First Moonrise.”
Beyond that, he’d restrict your freedom- limiting where you go, who you see, what you know. He’d do it “for your protection.” He’d tell himself it’s for your safety, and he’d almost believe it. The line between love and control is completely blurred for him.
Exposed: How much of their heart do they bare to their darling? How vulnerable are they when it comes to their darling?
Xanthus is deeply vulnerable with you. He shows you every crack in his armor- the guilt, the loneliness, the desperation. He doesn’t hide his tears or his fear of losing you. This vulnerability is part of his trap: How can you hate someone who loves you this much? How can you leave someone who’s so clearly broken without you? Honestly, even he doesn’t notice himself forming this “trap”; it’s purely instinct.
Fight: How would they feel if their darling fought back?
Xanthus hurts with you, alongside you. He frames your resistance as a lapse in judgment from you. He’ll never show anger again; that’s not his style, nor do I think he was written that way.
He’d take every blow, every insult, and he’d just look at you with those crimson eyes full of hurt. He might restrain you, but he’d be gentle about it. He’d whisper apologies while holding you down. Your resistance would hurt him more than any weapon could.
Circling back to “Exposed”, with how unhealthy this situation is for Love, they would probably fall for Xanthus’ misguided “truths” about him only doing all of this for their protection. After the absolute hell that you two have gone through together, fighting against him is pointless. He is the only one who understands you, or so he thinks.
Game: Is this a game to them? How much would they enjoy watching their darling try to escape?
No. This isn’t a game to him. He’s not playing with you. He needs you. There’s no thrill in the chase- only terror that you might actually get away. He doesn’t enjoy your attempts to escape; they destroy him. Every time you try to leave, a part of him dies.
^^ Again, depends on the stage of the relationship. If it’s early, it is a game to him. Episode 1, he mused about not being against kidnapping (“Or I’d be a hypocrite…” - his words); it’s akin to a cat-and-mouse chase at the beginning.
Hell: What would be their darling’s worst experience with them?
The worst experience would be hope. He’d give you moments of genuine tenderness- a walk in the garden, a quiet night by the fire, a memory of who you & he used to be. He’d let you believe you could trust him, let you almost forget what he did to you. And then he’d remind you, gently, that you can never leave. The hope, more than the captivity, is what would break you.
The past hurts, too- what you two used to have. The faces of all those lost protecting you and this bond are what keep you chained to this purgatory. You hope it will change. The nostalgia for old times blurs your perception.
Ideals: What kind of future do they have in mind for/with their darling?
He dreams of a “for however long forever lasts for us,” but the forever forms into an actual forever if he decides to turn you, which, in this unhealthy and dangerous setup, would probably be against your wishes.
He wants to make a new world you’ll live in, which will never hurt you. At first, it might sound romantic, but it is akin to a golden cage.
Jealousy: Do they get jealous? Do they lash out or find a way to cope?
Xanthus is quite upfront with his feelings. If he’s jealous, he’ll tell you. Mostly, he’s possessive. He does not lash out against you. The solution for him is hurting the other party involved. There may be someone flirting with you, showing interest, or offering a moment of kindness. If he feels as if this other person has made you happier, provided a sense of comfort that he might not be able to do as well, Xanthus will kill them.
^^ This will be used as punishment. You will feel paranoia every time someone interacts with you. What if he hurts them? You’ll wonder, aware how this further isolates you from the world.
^^^ Or you could use it against him- a small moment of rebellion. Flirt and indulge in others all you want, if you’re alright with the end result of them dead and Xanthus hurt.
Kisses: How do they act around or with their darling?
You’re like a puppet next to Xanthus. In his mind, everything is fine. He’s sweet to you. He’ll kiss your forehead when you’re scared, your throat when you’re angry, your hands when you try to push him away. He’ll be around you all the time. There’s no moment of privacy. Even when you don’t see him- you know he’s close.
Love letters: How would they go about courting or approaching their darling?
We already know this. Xanthus won’t fully understand what he feels for you at first. Stalking and violation of privacy are a given. At the start, you will not be “courted”; his methods border on predatory. He’s watching and taking in your habits- what you seem pleased by, what makes your face twitch.
The first meeting is a game for Xanthus. He’ll push to see how many boundaries he can cross- what makes you tick. He has a way of making you feel like the ridiculous one if you protest in any way. His past in negotiations has given him the right supply of saccharine words, and the fact that he’ll know about what you covet and hate from the beginning will be used to build this illusion of him being otherworldly, ethereal almost. You will seek him out. Not the other way around.
Mask: Are their true colors drastically different from the way they act around everyone else?
Yes. To the world, Xanthus is a gentleman- charming, composed, perhaps a little sad. No one suspects the possessiveness, the obsession, the desperation that lives beneath his skin. Only you see the cracks. Only you know what he’s capable of. And he prefers it that way- you’re his secret, his weakness, his everything.
Naughty: How would they punish their darling?
He’d never physically hurt you. His punishments are psychological: isolation, silence, the weight of his disappointment. If you defy him, he’ll withdraw- not to punish you, but because he can’t bear to see you reject him. He’ll leave you alone until you come to him, begging for his attention. He’ll make you need him.
Oppression: How many rights would they take away from their darling?
He’d take your freedom. Your ability to leave, to see others, to make decisions that don’t involve him. He’d monitor where you go and who you speak to. But he’d frame it all as protection, as love, as the only way to keep you safe from a world that would hurt you.
Patience: How patient are they with their darling?
Endless. He waited until you were at your weakest to turn you. He’ll wait as long as it takes for you to accept your new existence. He’ll wait through your anger, your grief, your hatred. Time is meaningless to him- he’s willing to wait forever.
Quit: If their darling dies, leaves, or successfully escapes, would they ever be able to move on?
You won’t die literally- he’d turn you. You won’t leave- you are completely dependent on him financially, physically and emotionally. You won’t successfully escape- he is too calculated to let you. And the idea of him moving on is ridiculous and unheard of for him. He’d be offended if you even mention it to him.
^^ But let’s say you do die- honestly, I think he’d kill himself. He already hates himself so much, and this idea of him killing himself after your death isn’t unheard of- he said it himself in the last episode.
^^^ If you did somehow manage to escape (which in some twisted way would impress and hurt him, also deepening the obsession at the same time), he would hunt you to the ends of the world. There is genuinely no way to escape him without outside help, which is so little- no one would go against him, and you are so isolated.
Regret: Would they ever feel guilty about abducting their darling? Would they ever let their darling go?
Yes. He regrets the pain he’s caused you. He regrets that you hate him. But he doesn’t regret keeping you. He’d do it all again. The guilt is present, but it’s not enough to make him let you go. He’ll live with the guilt; he’ll bear it gladly, as long as he has you. This man is centuries old; there is much he feels regret for, but not enough to stop.
Stigma: What brought about this side of them (childhood, curiosity, etc)?
His childhood and his vampiric nature. He was alone for so long- immortal, watching people he loved wither and die. He couldn’t bear to lose one more person. The stalking, captivity, obsession, and future turning of Love was an act of desperation, not malice. His love is rooted in fear, and that fear made him cruel.
^^ He is nearing 500 years of age, and morality and the social views of what is right/wrong have long since hardened for him.
Tears: How do they feel about seeing their darling scream, cry, and/or isolate themselves?
You can’t isolate yourself from him- so you stick with screaming and crying to make him feel the hurt you are currently going through. It would hurt him as well, but the pain is a part of his “devotion”. He will gladly let you protest against him, knowing full well you won’t be successful. In his mind, this is the price to keep you safe.
Unique: Would they do anything different from the classic yandere?
Xanthus’s uniqueness stems from his long life, his skewed moral compass, his own self-hatred, and the way he puts Love on a pedestal.
He is so soft in his obsession & possessiveness. While the classical yandere is sharp, Xanthus is soft. He is someone you will always, even against the screams of your logical mind, associate with the safety and compassion he used to give you.
^^ While talking about the past & Xanthus’ “softness”, we need to note how the people in his life (other than Love) serve as anchors for him (he needs a community to keep going, something that a classical yandere might not have or be absolutely incapable of forming).
^^^ Dontis’ death also pushes him over the edge. He was already starting to isolate himself before he began to do the same to you. But Love all, on their own, cannot “fix” him; it’s all for naught.
Vice: What weakness can their darling exploit in order to escape?
Your pain. If you can make him believe you’re truly suffering, truly broken, he might loosen his grip- not to let you go, but to try to “fix” it. Your sadness is his weakness. If you weaponize it, you might have a chance.
^^ Circling back to “Quit”, this escape plan will need adequate planning and proper outside help. The best time for it would be after your turning. With the strong mutual emotional bond gone, you will have just a smidge of privacy that you can exploit, not to mention the heightened senses and strength.
Wit’s end: Would they ever hurt their darling?
He’d never intentionally hurt you- not physically. But he might break down, sob, beg (a rare sight, only for your eyes). He’d collapse at your feet and plead for you to love him. His breaking is as devastating as yours. The sight of him unraveling might be your best chance to escape- or your worst reason to stay.
Xoanon: How much would they revere or worship their darling? To what length would they go to win their darling over?
He worships you. He’s built his entire existence around you. There’s nothing he wouldn’t do to earn your love. The tragedy is that he doesn’t realize you can’t earn what you’ve taken.
^^ Circling back to “Affection”, you cannot love someone you put on a pedestal.
Yearn: How long do they pine after their darling before they snap?
He pined for you before you even knew him. He watched you from a distance, memorized your face, and imagined your life. He wanted you before you were his. And when you died- or nearly died, he snapped. The wanting became too much. He had to have you. His love is his own undoing.
Zenith: Would they ever break their darling?
Yes. Xanthus’ already broken you- or he will. Love is already traumatized because of what happened, but there is more in store. He’ll turn you against your will, strip you of your humanity, make you depend on him for survival. But he won’t stop there. He wants you to accept it. He wants you to love him back. When you do, when you finally give in, that’s his zenith.
thank you so much for reading! reblogs and input are appreciated. 💌
HIII, I love your blog! I want to ask (since Anon asked if you do NSFW, I wanted to ask you questions too)! Do you write yandere fic too? 😅
yes, i would! honestly i would love to continue writing both nsfw + yandere fics as well. i saw a yandere alphabet some time ago and that got my interest. now i have exams coming up so i think i’ll be focussing mostly on headcanons or short fics.
HONEY WHISKEY; ISAAC RHOADES. 3.5k wc && ao3 mirror.
SUMMARY: isaac works too hard. you want to give him something warm and sweet.
CWS: explicit sexual content, established relationship, dom/sub dynamics + undertones, handjob, fingering, nipple play, mild praise kink, aftercare, domestic fluff, kitchen sex, emotionally vulnerable sex, hurt/comfort, non-penetrative sex, gender neutral reader, mild breath play, cum eating, hand & finger kink.
A/N: this is my first time writing something explicit, so please be kind. i wanted to write something soft and intimate that felt true to Isaac’s character—someone who struggles to accept love but desperately deserves it.
First, line the loaf pan with parchment paper.
You tried to lightly brush the pan with oil to help the parchment stick to the pan. Lightly didn’t exactly click in your mind, because you’re sure you added a tad bit too much.
You click your tongue. Eyes darting around the kitchen, you swallow at the sight of the bread flour on the counter. You’ve set down a rectangular navy plate—from Isaac’s costlier tableware—on the table next to the counter. You figured it would be better to keep the dish away from the absolute mess you’ve made; flour on your fingers, still sticky from the honey.
Where did you place that whisk?
The honey is, unfortunately, too hot. Your lips thin, frowning. You could have sworn you kept it stored well to ensure the temperature. The scent of vanilla and honey does not distract you from the fact that you need to speed up if you want to get the Kasutera. (Upon research away from Isaac’s watchful eye, you found out that it carries the name Nagasaki cake).
It’s a delicate, honey-sweetened sponge cake that requires the utmost precision to get right; a notoriously difficult dessert to bake properly. You’re not sure what you were thinking when you picked this of all the Japanese desserts you could have chosen. Let’s just hope you can finish baking before he gets back. An empty house is perfect for preparing a gift for him; he works so hard. Though, you’re sure the house itself is not so satisfied by the mess you’ve made of the kitchen.
Isaac had raised a brow when you asked for a specific brand of honey—local or wildflower. Though you were able to distract him long enough to avoid explaining why. Not to mention the water syrup—Mizuame—is needed for the traditional recipe.
“You require…” Isaac tilts his head from the countless files sprawled across his desk, “Repeat that for me again?”
“Water syrup,” you affirm with a nod. “Oh, and honey. Not artificial, local.”
Isaac’s lips curl so slightly that someone who did not know how to read the subtle changes in his face would not notice the small smile. But you know. And you did notice it. Your lips follow in tandem despite the feeling of your shaky hands and sweaty palms.
“Alright.” He shifts his chair away from the desk, now facing you. “Indulge me for a second. Why do you need water syrup exactly? Not to mention the honey. Should I be expecting something from you?”
Your breaths frantically shiver between your rib cage. The air somehow is hotter and heavier. If you didn’t have a clandestine mission to surprise him for once instead of him turning the tables on you, you might have decided to tell him the truth. But the tenseness in his shoulder, twitching in his fingers and dark eye bags remind you why you started all of this in the first place.
You step closer, thigh now between his parted legs. His eyes do not leave your frame for a single second. You could get drunk on his gaze; irises blurred over with your mirrored desire that rivals the taste and sight of the most intoxicating wine.
You push forward.
Your leg brushes against his inner thigh. Your mind reels when you feel his body slightly twitch against yours. You place a hand on the chair’s armrest. Isaac gives no sound or touch to signal you to stop, other than a breathy gasp. Taking that as a yes, you place your right hand above his abdomen.
The air felt even heavier, but there’s a force pulling you closer to Isaac. The bemused look on his face spurs you on.
“Sweetheart,” he breathes out; music to your ears—
“Pickle?”
Crap.
You freeze, whisk still in hand. Flour dusts your apron as if you were in a snowstorm. The kitchen is in absolute disarray—melted honey, butter, and sugar cooked together in a pot; amber-hued residue on the stove top, spoon, and saucepan rim. You’re in the middle of it, honeyed fingers still sticky. You turn around, trying to block the messy counter.
Isaac is standing in the doorway. His expression is always neutral, almost pensive and melancholic, but this time, there is something else in his gaze. A small glint of curiosity mixed with the amused raise of his lips.
“You’re home early.” You note, with your voice a little too high.
His head leans to the side. For a moment, he just watches you. You feel small under his gaze; pinned down like you’re playing a game of cat and mouse. Too bad for him, two can play at that game.
“Everything wrapped up better than I expected.” His voice is smooth, and words spill from his lips like a river.
He takes a step closer. You notice that he looks a tad bit more disheveled than usual—slightly tussled hair; blazer gone, only left with his pristine white button-up. Your eyes trail to the top, undone buttons; his skin peeks out. Sweat lightly coats his neck and temples. Probably from the heat.
“Really?” You mirror the way Isaac has tilted his head. “Here I thought you came back early because you missed me.”
Isaac closes the distance between you quicker than you expected. Your chest tightens, hands grip the counter tighter. You might slip, considering how the growing heat in the room is making your palms sweat.
“Couldn’t keep me out of your mind?”
You scoff. “It’ll take a lot more than that for you to get an answer out of me.”
“I don’t doubt that I could get anything—” he hums, “—out of you. Move to the side.”
Isaac’s voice sends shivers down your spine. As much as you’d like to push back, say something akin to a bite to see that controlled and amused smile wiped off his pretty face.
His hand lifts and snakes around your waist. The skin, even beneath the layer of clothes, burns at the touch as if his fingers were akin to a cold burn. You bite your lip as you let him lead you away from the counter.
“What happened here?” You swear you can hear the way his voice has that familiar tone of sing-song mirth.
You stand behind him. Lying your head on the back of his shoulder, you snort lightly. He slightly turns his head. His lips graze the top of your head. You wonder if he’ll reward you with a small kiss. You know he’s a giver, but not before making you work and beg for it.
You sigh, knowing you can’t exactly lie to him. He’ll know in an instant. You’ve already gotten used to the fact that he knows you like the back of your hand.
“I…” you try to find the proper words. “I wanted to surprise you.”
Isaac’s eyes widen. You could get lost in the way his pupils dilate when his gaze is on you.
“Surprise me?”
“Well, you work so hard—”
“So do you, pickle.”
“Let me finish.” Your hands wrap around him from behind.
Isaac breathes in deeply. He can feel the rapid beat of your heart against his back and he’s sure you can feel his too. Your honeyed hands trail up his shirt, taking home against his chest.
He sure is easy to catch off guard with the right… touches. You wonder what other sounds you could coax out of him.
“You’ve been spending even more nights in your office.”
“Are you upset that I leave you alone at night?”
“I visit, don’t I?” Your fingers trace shapes mindlessly on his shirt, nails catching on the buttons. “But that’s not it. I do miss you, but I wanted to make you something you could enjoy. Like a sweet dessert. Unfortunately, I was a tad too overconfident.”
“Tad?” Isaac smiles while wiping a finger on the flour dusted across the counter.
You roll your eyes. “You’re welcome, by the way. It’s a honey cake. Kasutera, I think. Should have chosen something easier.”
You free one hand, lifting it to the melted honey. The liquid is heavy and warm on your finger.
“Is that the honey you asked me to purchase for you?”
“Yes,” you chirp. “How nice of you to get me everything I ask for. How so—”
A chuckle vibrates in his body. The feeling reaches your chest. You take a step closer, taking note of how his leg instinctively gives you a piece of opening to slide a thigh between.
“—very obedient.”
“What do you want?” Isaac’s voice is heavier. Not need— want. Like you’re being a brat, pushing his buttons. Like he’s waiting for you to have your fun before he has his own.
He knows you so well.
You raise your honey-covered fingers just a breath away from his lips. “Want a taste?”
Isaac’s breath is caged in his throat. A crooked smile forms on his lips. His hands grip the counter, just where you were just a second ago. His mind is wrapped in a euphoric haze, bordering on erotic because of what you’ve just asked of him.
He’ll deliver, he always does. Not once has he ever disappointed your whims and fantasies. Though after entertaining you, he’ll want—no—need even more.
Isaac’s hand leaves the countertop. He snatches your wrist. He can feel your chest shift against his back in surprise. He’d drink in the sight of your eyes, locked onto how he takes your fingers in, tongue wrapping around you. Though he realizes you planned all of this to give yourself the upper hand, leaving him purely to his senses while you watch entranced.
“I’ll indulge you.” His lips graze the inside of your wrist, feeling the unsteady pulse under the hot skin. “For now.”
Isaac’s lips part. You almost gasp at the sight. He takes your honey-covered fingers into his mouth. His tongue curls around the tip, and you sense the warmth of his mouth, every deliberate graze of his lips along your fingers, the heated flicks of his tongue as he parts your fingers. Or maybe you parted them. Honestly, because of your hazy mind, you can’t really tell.
He abruptly stops, and you whine at the slight suction as he pulls away, at the loss of touch.
He hums, considering. “Sweet.”
“Just sweet?”
His hand catches your wrist, holding you there. He brings your finger to his lips again, kissing the tip this time. “Like you. Do you want to taste it?”
Isaac slowly turns away from the counter, now facing you. His gaze is heavy upon your form, but you don’t break or bend. Your straightened spine, ghost of a smile now replaced with your sweet lips slightly parted.
“You already know my answer.” You say with a hiss escaping your lips.
“I want to hear you say it.”
A small scoff leaves you. “Seriously?”
“Is that a no?”
Of course it’s not. He knows that.
“You’re messing with me on purpose.”
His hand reaches your cheek, cradling the skin with the softest touch you’ll ever know in your life. It’s cut short as his hand lowers to your jaw. You swallow. His lips curl at the sight.
“Maybe I am—” he doesn’t get to finish the sentence. Not before your hands grip his collar.
His lips feel so familiar. You’ve tasted the peppermint on his tongue so many times, but every time you do, the sensation lights your skin on fire.
A small gasp from Isaac is muffled by your lips. The knots in his shoulders seem to dissipate. His body melts into yours— one hand on your back, trailing up your spine, making you arch into him. Your chest grazes his own. He moves his hand from your jaw and presses it into the clothed flesh of your hip.
Your knees weaken just for a moment. Isaac catches the change in balance, using the moment to slip his leg between your parted thighs.
“You’re eager.” You tease, already feeling his arousal graze the inside of your thigh. “I could help with that.”
“You will.”
You giggle as he pushes you against the table. There’s barely any space between you. The need to feel his bare skin under your hands becomes more and more unbearable with every passing teasing second. He’s enjoying this so much— collar left open, button up clutched in your hand, eyes dark with craving only you can satisfy.
His lips find your neck, and you tilt your head, giving him access. He hums into your skin in approval. His teeth graze your pulse point, making you lean your head back. The glide of his lips is taunting.
Your hands trail to his belt, fingers hooking through the loops. You coax him closer. The table’s surface is cold against your clothed skin; the temperature change makes you ache.
“How do you feel?” You can barely make out the sound of Isaac’s words.
You’re a mess of muffled giggles and whispers as he pulls away. His lips have turned red and flushed, and the sight is downright sinful to look at.
“I feel—” you move your fingers to his belt, asking for permission, “—like the dessert I made tasted good. But…”
He’s towering over you now. Letting out a soft laugh, his hand traces the same shapes you did on him just a few moments ago.
“Not enough for you?”
“Not nearly.”
He’s left breathless, and you want to push him even more. See him unravel under your fingertips.
“You can let go, you know.” You’re fine with begging, no matter how it makes your mind spiral.
“Greedy.” He tuts.
“What can I say?” The words tumble out of you as his hands lie on top of yours, guiding you while undoing his belt. “I like sweet things.”
“Take your fill then.”
He lets out a shaky gasp as you trail your fingers down his exposed abdomen. Your lips curl. The twitch of his own lips sends electricity through your nerves. You don’t break eye contact, too hungry to let go of the blurry way his eyes tear slightly at your teasing hands.
“You’re stalling,” he spits out through unsteady breaths.
“Greedy,” you repeat his words back at him. “Do you have any idea how it excites me that even though I am the one basically pinned to the table, you’re the one unraveling. Literally.”
His jaw tightens. You watch him fight for control— and lose. His lips part—a gasp, whine—you’re not sure. You don’t let him finish.
Your hand slips beneath his waistband, finding him warm and hard. He gasps—a sharp, broken sound—and his forehead drops to yours. You flick your wrist near the base of his cock, trailing slowly up till you reach his tip—wet, you note.
“There you go…” You whisper near his ear, teeth grazing his lobe.
Your fingers glide over the flushed tip, forming a gentle hold over his length. His head drops into the crook of your neck. You hear him barely forming the words—
“What about you?”
“What about me?” You are too busy tracing the vein along his cock right back down to the base. “Tonight isn’t about me. You coming undone in my hands is enough to sate me for the entire night.”
Isaac’s breathing speeds up. You can see how today’s stress melts off his shoulders. He curls into you, closer, and needier. You readjust, coaxing his voice higher. His hips twitch under your moving hand. The physical sensations are completely drowned out by the rush you’re instilling in him.
But, of course, he can’t let you have all the fun.
His shaking hand rises, tracing up your abdomen.
“Isaac—”
Your skin twitches as his fingers trace your collarbone, completely missing your chest. Your brows furrow.
“What are you planning?” Your wrist flicks again, holding just below his cock.
He doesn’t answer. His fingers find the sides of your neck first, cradling the column of your throat. His thumbs press against your pulse points, feeling the rapid, unsteady beat beneath your skin.
“I need to feel you,” he breathes. “Please. I need to feel you.”
You swallow. He feels it—the movement of your throat beneath his palms. His gaze is completely unguarded.
“You’re feeling me right now,” you say, your voice falling back into the same fit of soft giggles and gasps.
He shakes his head. “Not enough.”
His hands trail down slowly from your neck to your chest. His palms press flat against the fabric of your shirt, feeling the heat of your skin beneath. His thumbs find your nipples through the cotton, circling them in slow, measured strokes.
Your breath catches. Your hips press forward, and you sense him twitch against your wrist.
“Sensitive,” he murmurs. You can’t tell if it’s an observation or him teasing you.
“Isaac.”
“I want to make you feel good too.” His voice is rough and strained. “Let me. Please, sweetheart.”
His hands press a little harder against your chest, pinching and rolling your nipples through the fabric. “I want to make you feel as good as you’re making me feel. I want to touch you, taste you, hear you. I want—” He swallows. “I want to do something for you. For once.”
You shake your head, knowing the one thing he cannot stand to even think of is not being enough to please, protect, and satisfy you.
“Isaac,” you call his name again, and this time his hand slowly leaves your chest. “I already told you that tonight is about you. This is what I want. Is it what you want as well?”
There’s a storm in his eyes. Though it does not last for long before he’s bucking his hips back into your wrapped fist. A yes, barely above a whisper, is all you need.
Your hand slips lower, pressing into the sensitive skin just behind his balls. He jerks against you, a shudder running through his whole body.
“There,” he breathes, his voice catching. “Please—"
You press harder, circling the spot with your thumb. His hips buck into your hand, desperate and uncoordinated.
“That’s it,” you murmur against his ear. “Let go, Isaac. I’ve got you.”
Your thumb finds the sensitive ridge beneath the head of his cock, and you circle it slowly. He makes a sound—not quite a moan, not quite a whimper—and his face hides deeper into the crook of your neck.
His whole body tenses against yours. You feel the way his breath hitches, the way his hands grip your waist.
“I’m—” His voice breaks.
“I know.” You press harder against that sensitive ridge, and he cries out—a broken, desperate sound that makes your chest ache. “Let go. I’ve got you.”
He does. His body arches against yours. You feel the warmth of him, the way he shakes, the sound he makes—raw and vulnerable and completely, utterly yours.
You hold him through it. Your hand slows, stroking him gently through the aftershocks. Your other hand finds the back of his head, fingers threading through his hair.
“I’ve got you,” you repeat. “I’m right here.”
His hands tremble against your waist, along with breathing hitching, uneven, and broken.
“I’m here,” you say again.
He lifts his head. His eyes are red-rimmed, his cheeks flushed. His lips are parted, still catching his breath. He looks wrecked—and beautiful.
“Shh.” You press a kiss to his forehead. “Don’t say anything.”
Slowly, deliberately, you bring your honey and cum slicked fingers to your lips. His eyes widen, tracking the movement—watching you taste him, taste the honey, taste the heated moment that passed between you two.
You let your tongue curl around your fingers. The honey is still sweet, warm, mixed with the salt of his skin. You hum, considering.
“Sweet,” you say, echoing his words from earlier. “Just like you promised.”
He stares at you, completely undone. His lips part, but no words come out.
“What?” you ask, innocent. “You didn’t think I’d let you have all the fun?”
He shakes his head, a breathless laugh escaping him. “You’re going to be the death of me.”
“Probably.” You lick the last of the mixed liquid from your thumb. “But what a way to go.”
He pulls you closer, burying his face in your neck again. You feel his smile against your skin.
+++
“You’re going to get my sheets wet if you don’t stand still.”
Your hair is still wet from the shower—a shared one the two of you took—that simmered warmth down your nerves in an instant. You didn’t think Isaac could look even more relaxed, but here he is—a soft smile tugging on his lips as he holds a hair-dryer in his hand.
“Your sheets?”
“Our sheets.”
“Getting the sheets wet is also a particular choice of words,” you smirk. “Actually, if I didn’t know any better, I’d think you were asking for round two. Can’t get enough of me, huh?”
He turns the dryer on before you can continue. You pout, but the feeling is short-lived. His hand trails to your nape. Hairs stand on end. Isaac guides you with his palm against your neck. The warm air is blowing past your ears, but it can’t drown out the gentle beat of your heart.
“You need rest, pickle.”
“Stay with me?”
The hair-dryer turns off. He places a chaste kiss on the top of your head. You chuckle as the sensation.
“Of course.”
thank you so much for reading! reblogs and input are appreciated. 💌
You free one hand, lifting it to the melted honey. The liquid is heavy and warm on your finger.
“Is that the honey you asked me to purchase for you?”
“Yes,” you chirp. “How nice of you to get me everything I ask for. How so—”
A chuckle vibrates in his body. The feeling reaches your chest. You take a step closer, taking note of how his leg instinctively gives you a piece of opening to slide a thigh between.
“—very obedient.”
“What do you want?” Isaac’s voice is heavier. Not need— want. Like you’re being a brat, pushing his buttons. Like he’s waiting for you to have your fun before he has his own.
He knows you so well.
You raise your honey-covered fingers just a breath away from his lips. “Want a taste?”
---
snippet 🧍🏻♀️🧍🏻♀️cough. i’ll have it up by today or tmr
