Still Photos of a Man Running

musings of a moondog 18 years closer to my demise. From the Land of Mary. I am a disciple of Calvin & Hobbes.

[fineyoungatheist-blog]

I don't use Tumblr anymore. 

But it's 2 AM and I can't sleep. I don't sleep anymore anyway. Too much to do. Not enough time to do it.

She fucked some guy. With friends in odd places you find out everything you really don't want to know, even though the whole time she's gone it's been looming as this gigantic shadow in the most remote spot in the back of my mind. So she fucked some guy. I'm not mad at her. I'm not mad at the guy. I'm not mad at the friend who told me what I didn't want to know. 

I'm mad at myself. For knowing it would happen and doing nothing about it.

We all like boundaries. We all like defining things. We all find comfort in knowing absolutes. And when you go so long without a name or an agreement or an understanding of what you are to another person,  you ride a wave, a wave of bliss, a wave of living in the now, refusing to acknowledge that there are consequences for your inaction. And all waves crash. 

I cared about her so much that I willed myself to believe that the wave wouldn't crash. 

And she doesn't know it did. It was my wave. My projection of where we stood that reality could shit on. 

I'm not sad. I'm just disappointed. I wish I could go back to the  BVI's where I could pretend that she missed me as much as I missed her and I could sail every single day to nowhere in particular but know that by the time night came I'd have enough stories to scrawl down on the scraps of paper I'd send back home to her.

But, to quote Vonnegut, "So it goes."

And to quote my one time partner in crime, Peter,

"You done goofed, Matt."

I guess you're right, Peter.

[dontcallmeoscar-deactivated2019]

2012 Oscar Movies as Portrayed by a Very Cute Baby

THE ARTIST.

[vanityfair]

Just… go here. Now.  (War Horse might be our favorite.)

[By Maggie Storino starring Baby Sophia]

[fineyoungatheist-blog]

I swore I would never reblog anything, but this is just too good. 

[fineyoungatheist-blog]

Night Scene, or Tom Klotz's Superfast Sonnet

I wrote this in 13 minutes for Tom Klotz's English homework all while sitting on a toilet. I was compensated for my efforts with a Red Bull. Good deal.

Standing sentinel the statuary, Sees before it not at all stirring, Fellow denizens, stone mortuary, Grown old and stagnant without demurring. Morning light sweeps in on frozen faces, Holding for years the same conversation, Sworn forever to watch empty places,  Where once were scenes of glamoured elation. Wind whispers over the cold cobblestone, And caresses limb and stone cheek alike, Leaving through the gate as rust hinges moan, As The statue garden stands still by night.

[fineyoungatheist-blog]

Santigold - Starstruck

This is the song Peter and I would play back when we used to joyride down to Baltimore at 2am. Her new album drops this week. I'm excited.

Song I've had sex to (and no, it was not with Peter)

[fineyoungatheist-blog]

Basically the best video of all time. I will never be able to watch this and not laugh.

[fineyoungatheist-blog]

You are beautiful.

Thank you. I mean it.

[fineyoungatheist-blog]

POST MORE STUFF PLEASE DON'T ABANDON ME URNGHHH

Alright alright. I've just been lazy!

[fineyoungatheist-blog]

hey. so i accidentally found this. and i can't resist the urge to say: no 1 curr. about your horrible poetry and your modeling aspirations and your future ivy league strike-outs (it's a sports pun, sort of!) but the graduate is still amazing. stop liking my movies.

Thanks darling.

[fineyoungatheist-blog]

Exhibit of Cai Guo-Qiang at the Guggenheim from 2008. Best I've ever seen

[fineyoungatheist-blog]

Road to Nowhere

[fineyoungatheist-blog]

moderndayart.

[fineyoungatheist-blog]

Lykke Li - I Know Places (Live on the Moon)

You know how some people plan out their weddings? Well, I thought it'd be more fun to envision your funeral, because ultimately you really don't get much of a say in it. I want this song sung at my funeral. It's somber but I don't want my funeral to be sad. Rather, I want my life ultimately to be worth celebrating.

[fineyoungatheist-blog]

Nine Inch Nails - Closer

Song I've had sex to

[fineyoungatheist-blog]

As my state of Maryland finally gives homosexuals the right to marry, I'd just like to throw out this old video of anti-gay activist Anita Bryant taking a pie to the face.

Enjoy :)

[fineyoungatheist-blog]

lust

Your lips are a fine wine, 

I want to get drunk on you

Your mind is a hard drug,

I want to get high with you

Your body is a temple,

I want to be a God in you.

[fineyoungatheist-blog]

Oh Edward Gorey, your sickly sadism makes me smile.

[fineyoungatheist-blog]

666 Drive-Thru

Fast stacks

on faster tracks

selling thoughts

and hanging hats

/

in cellars of mind

on rusted tacks

//

outside the 666 Drive-Thru

//

drive by

in the mind's eye

of blue earth

and green sky

/

baking grief

where sirens cry

//

off the 666 Drive-Thru

//

Jesus christ

sitting Shotgun

Passenger of

a Cadillac

Of detroit dreams

and american Blues

//

that built the 666 Drive-Thru

//

Buddha flips

nirvana Fries

Yours to eat

for simple Change

A smooth slice

of Paradise

//

found at the 666 Drive-Thru

//

Vishnu walks

on Pavement

Oozing pores

in Fishnets

And lipstick

the painted Whore

//

by the 666 Drive-Thru