Desperately Johan grasped levers and turned knobs, he couldn’t be sure anything he was doing had any real effect, but at this point in the adventure he’d found himself on he was willing to try anything.  “This damn doomsday device is more complex than the time I was assigned to review Batman Vs. Superman!” He yelled in frustration into the wireless microphone dangling from his lapel, trying desperately to relay his anger to his partner below the waves.
Shumy, meanwhile, made various whale noises while in hot pursuit of the escape pod that had been launched from the underwater base below the frozen wastelands of the arctic moments before. Shumy had lost too much in the last week to allow Dr. Vink to escape now, whether or not his demented plan to evaporate the earths oceans was destined to succeed, he deserved the fate coming to him, and he would receive it. Through the cold depths of the ocean he pursued his quarry when the frustrated rantings of his new friend, noted California film critic Johan was picked up with his mighty sonar. For now all Shumy could do was focus on the task at hand, and trust Johan’s twenty plus years of watching terrible movies and writing scathing reviews in the L.A times could somehow translate to figuring out a complex doomsday device threatening the world.
Johan continued to struggle with the bizarre machine, who stood to gain from the entire loss of the worlds oceans anyway? Under his breath he cursed Vink in the same tone of voice he normally reserved for his undying hatred of Cinema Sins. The creaky underwater base heaved to a fro as Johan desperately tried to find some kind of shutdown switch or override command. He’d not felt this level of abject fear since the time he said down for an 11 P.M viewing of Transformers Age of Extinction, but he was determined to not allow that movies subtitle to become the hard fact of the world in which he lived.  “Shumy, do you read? Have you learned anything about the device, have you caught Vink?” His line of questioning more a desperation for any kind of good news than one of genuine inquiry into the situation at hand. Finally, over his communications device he heard the booming whale noises of Shumy, harmonic sounds that had once only been fit to help him sleep, now a damn beautiful reminder that his new friend was still okay.Â
Finally Shumy had cornered Vink at a glacier, he had nowhere to go. Resigned to his fate, trapped in the small bubble of the escape pod and surrounded by ice cold death in every direction Vink could only look his mortal enemy in the eye and utter out one last indignity.  “You deserved Seaworld.” It’s been said by many that Shumy never did live up to his species “killer” moniker, but this day was different, and it would change him forever. Rapidly, Shumy sent out the disarm code it found in the escape pod to Johan, still desperately turning knobs and dials in an attempt to make something, anything, beneficial happen in the underwater base. As soon as he heard them in his ear piece Johan punched them into the soviet era computer, and to his great relief, the large machine stopped his dreadful hum and he knew the threat was finally over. His mind raced over the last week as he replayed the bizarre adventure he’d had with his new best whale friend, before suddenly stopping and realizing something urgent, something he’d completely forgotten about.
“I was supposed to have delivered in my review of Free Willy 7: Willy’s Revenge this morning!” Shumy smiled his big killer whale smile as he overheard his friends panicked proclamation of a tardy due date, the more things in his corner of the ocean changed, the more things in the fast paced world of Hollywood stayed the same!
