Those Who Are About to Graduate - We Salute You
Ashley Lister
So, now you’re a graduate – let’s give you three cheers You’ve completed your studies without stabbing your peers You have studied three years to earn this degree And yet still you can’t use an apostrophe.
You have earned this award – we can see at a glance You deserve it for dealing with Student Finance. You’re now saddled with debt from exorbitant fees And still you can’t use those apostrophes.
Your literature dissertation could not have been easier: Thank fuck for York notes! God bless Wikipedia! You’ve read Wuthering Heights and John Donne’s ‘The Flea’ Yet still you can’t use an apostrophe.
You now manage your work like the rest of us do You can write a whole paper on the night when it’s due. You’ve spent weeks before deadlines on a diet of coffee But still you can’t use that apostrophe.
With that said, we salute you. Good job. Well done you. You worked hard. You learnt lots. Let’s give credit where due. Enjoy your achievement, education’s the key. And one day, spare a thought for the apostrophe.
