jerking off is gay because you’re the same gender as yourself
*usually
hello vonnie
Jules of Nature
Claire Keane
EXPECTATIONS
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Fai_Ryy
Cosmic Funnies

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"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"
Keni

tannertan36

oozey mess
almost home
NASA

Product Placement
Mike Driver
🪼

Game Changer & Make Some Noise
2025 on Tumblr: Trends That Defined the Year

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@flightfulkwi
jerking off is gay because you’re the same gender as yourself
*usually
religion is so fucking funny the world is just too beautiful there must be a higher entity behind all this. lets oppress women
teamwork makes the dream work. and dreamwork. makes shrek
fantastic. i love it. i posted this after my wife said it yesterday and as i was doing it i was like "this can't be an original thought. as soon as i hit post someone's going to say 'you stole this from a tweet from 2014' and i'll say 'no, i stole it from my beautiful wife.'"
Please remember that almost everyone around you is traumatized. I didn’t understand this when I was younger. I wondered why people acted so strangely and irrationally. Maybe all children wonder this. The author Robert Anton Wilson said (paraphrasing), “We have never seen a completely sane adult human.” No one makes it out of this life alive. It’s not their fault. Mercy, kindness, forgiving — these are what makes one human. They are other names for love. People break in the strangest of ways.
“Under the present brutal and primitive conditions on this planet, every person you meet should be regarded as one of the walking wounded. we have never seen a man or woman not slightly deranged by either anxiety or grief. we have never seen a totally sane human being." — Robert Anton Wilson
sorry I saw a post about AAVE and got fired up and had to make this
Having internet friends is an experience. Did you eat today? I can't believe your sister hasn't apologized yet, what a bitch. Drink a glass of water right now. Want to see a cat picture? I love you. I know you better than your parents. I don't know your name. I'm having a rough day, can you talk to me about your favorite videogame? I love you. Good morning means good night means good afternoon means go to sleep. Here's a doodle I made in class. I'm stealing your clothes as we speak, they're so pretty. I love you. I love your pet. What does your hair look like? I'd love to see that weird leaf. I love you. I'm making you your favorite food. Thank you for holding my secrets for me. I love you. We're having a coffee date. I love you. I'm giving you a screen-sized hug. I love you. I love you. I love you.
Hey check your titties for any lumps
And ur balls if applicable
And your balls
Assess the orbs for irregularities.
wedding dresses are white specifically so that if the bride goes axe-crazy you can rest assured you will see the blood stains all over her and it'll be sick as fuck
Suddenly struck with a need to explain to you how boat pronouns work (I work in the marine industry).
When you're talking about the design of the boat, you say "it".
When the boat is still being built, your say "it".
When the boat is nearing completion, you can say "it" or "she".
When the boat is floating in the water you probably say "she", unless there is still a lot of work to be done (e.g. no engine yet) then you say "it".
When the boat is officially launched and operating, you say "she". If you continue to say "it" at this point you are not incorrect but suspiciously untraditional. You are not playing the game.
If you are referring to a boat you don't really know anything about you may say "it" ("there's a big boat, it's coming this way"). But if you know its name, it's probably "she" ("there's the Waverley, she's on her way to Greenock").
If you are talking about boats in general, you say "it" ("when a boat is hit by a wave it heels over")
If you speak about a boat in complimentary terms, it's "she" ("she's a grand boat"). If you are being disparaging it may be it, but not necessarily ("it's as ugly as sin", "she's a grotty old tub").
If she has a boy's name, she's still she. "Boy James", "King Edward", "Sir David Attenborough"? The pronoun is she.
If it's a dumb barge (no engine), you say it. But if it's a rowing boat (no engine), you say she.
I hope this has cleared things up so that you may not be in danger of misgendering floating objects.
Hit "view post" and lost it
I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I - the alphabet as seen from the side
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ . _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
the alphabet as seen from directly above
this doesn't add up, if the alphabet looks like that from the side then all the letters are standing in front of eachother, while if it looks like that from the top they're all standing side by side
once I snorted a fat line of nuance and everything started depending. watch out
do u ever send smth in a chat thats not even risqué like “i luv salsa” but no one responds so u start overthinking it like…. maybe one of their parents died making salsa…… maybe they were all just talking abt how they hate salsa……. maybe salsa isnt evn real and they have no idea what im talking abt
not to gross u out but i daydream abt u resting ur head on my chest and ur completely at ease and ur safe and warm
i hate it when people mistake "etymology" with "entomology." like, i know where they coming from but it still bugs me
"Whimsy" is truly a wretched term. What maketh thee so carefree?
thy mother
Art thou for fucking real
every year I post this meme and every year people get more mad at me than they did the previous year