My friend keeps telling me I'm faking being black (i'm half black half mestiza) because my hair isn't kinky and only has a slight wave, and I have lighter skin (though still clearly not white) and I don't know what to do as she is one of my only friends and I don't want to lose her, but she's really getting to me
I know what you mean about asserting yourself and worrying about losing people. However you have to think about if “friendship” is really worth making you feel bad about yourself. Even in friendship we have to establish boundaries and sometimes people don’t know what those boundaries are so we need to be direct and tell them.
You don’t have to be hard on her but gently tell her it makes you feel bad when she tells you you’re faking being black because (whatever the reason is) and you’d like her to stop saying that.
If she cares about your friendship, she’ll stop. Friends should be the people we go to when other people aren’t being so nice.
I hope this helps!– Jay
