Project THC: Edible Division
Manufacturing details: Produced by the lays Frato-laid (formerly known as frito-lay).
Key transformation components:
Chip dust mixed with powdered Natty Light residue
Corn masa soaked in used pong table water
Seasoning blended with late-night pizza grease and microdoses of testosterone
Plastic bag interior coated with dorm-room pheromones
Crunch vibration calibrated to lower IQ by 40 points per bite
Testing: “Ok, guys. This one was sent by. . .looks like a Doritos. Thanks for sending this, Doritos! Let’s open.”
In Johnathan’s hands is a large cardboard box with the Doritos logo on it. He was filming an unboxing video for his YouTube channel. He didn’t even like chips but his viewers (and his sponsor) didn’t need to know that. Opening the branded box, he found maybe a dozen packs of Doritos chips.
“Ok, these look amazing. What flavor are these? Oh, looks like there's a new flavor: Super Cheese.”
He opened one of the bags and took a performative sniff. He had to suppress the urge to gag, it smelled distinctively like old socks and overripe cheese. He smiled wide at the camera and plucked one out. When he placed it in his mouth he was hit with a powerful taste of nacho cheese and chipotle peppers.
“Wow!” He exclaimed, “That's hot. Like really hot.”
Despite his better judgment he went in for another, then another. Until maybe half the bag was gone. He wiped his hand carelessly on his t-shirt, leaving an orange streak. The orange powder seemed to spread across the shirt. Growing into a larger and larger stain until his whole shirt crumbled into cheese dust.
Johnathan glanced down, too absorbed in his bag of chips to care. His skin began to take on a deeper tan and his body inflated with lean muscles. His brand new vans began to wear down, becoming years old in a matter of seconds. Jewelry wrapped itself on his wrists and fingers.
As he chewed, his jaw shifted. Withers can but it became slimmer and any beginnings of wrinkles vanished. His face now one of aloof hotness, his mind soon matched. The cheese rewrote his sense of self entirely, making his brain foggy. So foggy he could recall, well, anything. He didn’t remember putting up that camara. Didn’t even remember what year it was.
When the bag was empty he pounded on his chest in a show of bravado.
“Soooo good bros. LETS GOOO!!!!” He glanced around at the bags and bags of Doritos. “Like, Where did these even come from, bro? I don’t remember things for shit.” He laughed.
Then he remembered what time it was: 10:35. Shit, he was late for school. He couldn’t fail senior year for the third time.
File name:SJ-ED-Peanut butter cup
Manufacturing details:produced in partnership with Graystone Athletics and the Hershey company.
Key transformation components:
Peanut butter whipped with extracted sweat from used shin guards
Chocolate shell spiked with “goal celebration hormones”
Cups constructed using molds from designer jockstrap factories
Packaging microperforated with muscle pheromone mist
Filling enriched using stadium air from Saturday night matches
Testing: Walking home after school, he was extremely hungry. The long day of studying and learning had taken it out of him. Thankfully he had grabbed a pack of peanut butter cups from the old vending machine outside the school gym.
As he walked by the athletic field he had just gotten the sealed package open. He took a large bite and was hit by the strong flavor of peanut butter. He polished off the first cup with relish, but was soon hit by the feeling of vertigo.
His height shot up, bones cracking to give him broad shoulders and a wide set of hips. He felt a slight pinch in his ears as a pair of fake diamond studs materialized. His long messy wave pulled back into his head into a trendy sporty style. His jaw sharpened to create a strong profile.
Muscles pumped into his body faster and faster till his crappy cardigan and jeans burst to shreds. Sharp cut abs and pecs were revealed and he rubbed them without hesitation. Dark hair growing unto muscled arms and legs. He stood shaking on massive feet trying to remember what he was doing.
He saw the last peanut butter cup on the ground and grabbed it, eating it without hesitation. His discarded school bag shifted into a soccer ball and nylon workout pants formed around his thick thighs. He ran onto the field with excitement, kicking the ball as he went.
Manufacturing details: Produced by Graystone Labs, Georgia division.
Key transformation components:
Cornflakes made with real silo dust from Nebraska farm co-ops
Milk powder mixed with authentic barn musk
Natural sugars replaced with “clean organic” sweetener
Box lined with hay-scent aerosols
Oats treated with UV radiation to simulate outdoor farm labor
Crunch-timbre calibrated to trigger “country-fried brainwaves”
Testing: Cassie sat down with a bowl of cereal. As a nursing student, she rarely had the time or money to go to the grocery shop. She had woken up knowing she had already eaten her last eggs the other morning. But in the back of the cabinet she had found an old box of off-brand cornflakes and had poured herself a bowl.
Her first bite was chalky and obviously a bit stale, she continued chewing as she looked over yesterday's notes. As she chewed her clothes began to shift, scrubs becoming loose white pants and shirts that didn’t fit correctly…yet.
She shifted in the orange chair, trying to accommodate for her body that began to change. Still, she was too absorbed in her notes to notice anything amiss. Her feet began to grow out of her socks, revealing long white arches. Limbs lengthening into sun tanned muscle. She tabbed her long fingers on the table as her mind began to wander.
Her throat became instantly thicker as the changes spread up to her face. Her tight bun exploded into a roughly cut mullet. Face becoming longer, a long nose and thick eyebrows appearing. A small scattering of body hair grew like she had never shaved before. A permanent smell of livestock formed around him.
She lost focus in her schoolwork entirely as a course of pleasure coursed through her body. Her brain started to rewrite itself, memories and instincts changing. Ambitions of becoming a pediatrician were replaced by much smaller dreams of farming and living simply in the south. Skills changed as she gained knowledge of agriculture and home cooking. The source of pleasure became obvious as she reached down to her crotch feeling for the growing penis that was pushing its way into existence. Becoming fully formed and erect as she became he.
A cap plopped onto his head as he fully embraced his new self. A ruddy, stinky, dirt-under-the-nails midwestern teenage farm boy.
File name:(RC)AS-ED-Sprite
Manufacturing details: produced in partnership with Graystone International.
Key transformation components:
Lemon-lime flavor adjusted with Kabosu limes
Bottle plastic mixed with recycled Chinese take out containers
Liquid aerated using pheromone enriched air from Japanese gyms
Sugar blend calibrated for maximum speed + minimum brain activity
Carbonation spiked with cultural spectrum chemicals
Testing: He cracked it open mid-commute. He needed the boost trying to walk the seven blocks to the office.
The fizz exploded in his mouth, way too strong. His body jolted in shock. Energy flooded him instantly, his legs twitching, heart pounding, lungs expanding like they could never run out of air.
He chugged it. Big fucking mistake.
His cubby frame began to skim down, he also lost at least multiple inches. The fattiness in his limbs changed into lean muscle. Lean abs formed under his clothes as his skin began to take on a lighter tone. His face lost all roundness as it became lean, sharp and youthful.
His brain… didn’t keep up. Memories of being another office worker replaced by being an international transfer student. His internal thoughts were in Mandarin instead of English. His suit melted away, replaced by a black t-shirt and baggy jeans. His hair becomes messy and straight.
“Yo—yo—yo—” he laughed, bouncing on his toes. “Gada’ get to school”
He didn’t remember where he was originally going. Already on route to a school in the opposite direction. Sipping on his sprite like it was the best thing in the world. He was so glad 妈妈 had sent him his favorite 雪碧 from china, all this American soda was garbage anyway.
(Going to do more streamlined theming for this series from now on. This one was a lot of fun, lots of cool stuff a racial change, southern tf, and a couple classic jock transformations. I’m not sure if I’ll add to this series again for while, but enjoy this yummy blend of shorts)
