Genuinely gob smacked. I've been removed from a university chat group. I'd been debating commenting in the thread but my anxiety had been getting the better of me, to have the choice made for me is disgusting.
The problem arose 4 years ago when I messaged a then bride as I hadn't received a wedding invitation; everyone was talking about food choices in the group chat and I was confused. The bride screenshotted a message saying I was going to get back to her, claiming I hadn't - I responded with a screenshot showing I had. She said she would send an invite and that week I received an evening invitation. I was confused and upset, naturally I messaged the bride genuinely wanting to know if it was a mistake or if anything could be done and she took offense. She was rude and I purposefully kept calm as I didn't want screenshots being dragged across to others in a bitchy manner. I said it had been a joint misunderstanding (BS, it was on her). I thought things were left at an OK point, not great but OK. I wasn't sure whether to go to the reception, but someone encouraged me to go. In hindsight this person was two faced. When my now husband and I arrived it was clear they had been bitching. My husband kept telling me it was paranoia. The bride and groom ignored me, I had wanted to apologise (even though I didn't need to). The friendship group clearly knew my pregnancy secret, which I had trusted Ms two face with, as they were making comments. I didn't want to rain in someone's parade so laughed it off. The bride and groom ushered the group, bar us, to have photo booth pictures and it was that point my husband accepted things were getting bad. We stayed for about two hours in total (to appear polite) before trying to leave unnoticed - it was a £50 trip, it seemed petty to strop off if it were simply paranoia. The sister of the bride had clearly been watching us, she challenged us and told us to say goodbye to the bride and groom who then happily humiliated me with the way they spoke to me and ignored my husband. I left in tears, my husband had watched the evening turn to mud before his eyes.
Regret I didn't bitch and prove those years ago that I'd not done anything malicious/wrong, that I hadn't been rude and that I'd been told to attend the damn reception by someone I had trusted and. I had the evidence in a chat, alas I wasn't petty and didn't expect anything to come of a joint misunderstanding.
After this I was blocked by the bride and deleted by the groom - why not do that before the wedding, I did nothing on the day itself to harm them and it would have stopped me going had they made it clear I wasn't welcome!!! Another in the group had deleted me, I found it odd but moved on as we were never that close.
About a year later, another was indirectly insulting me on Twitter. I retaliated indirectly, again in a smarter way incase screenshots were shared - I don't want to look a bitch!! This person had no reason to act this way, further reinforcing that bitchiness had occurred behind my back. Luckily it was someone I had secretly not liked and she blocked me on social media, not a big loss.
So in a group of 7 others, I'm blocked/deleted by 4. The other 3 do not bother with me, although one did privately message me to congratulate me on the birth of my baby - showing he doesn't want others to know he is fine to talk.
Similar instance actually happened to another in the group. They had upset me, I'd let it go but the group took it too far and essentially cut her out. It's quite toxic really.
University heightened my social anxiety and insecurity, it was not the joyful time of life that is painted in the media. The actions of this person today have made me resent that time of my life further.
turnnoffyourmind
ellievsbear
jacobvanloon
romaincrisis
discoholicmusic
jbbartram-illu
2087
kaledo-art
