Fractious and Fictitious

Mary//Georgia

[deseptions-deactivated20170708]

“how come you’re single?”

[holedyke]

i love walking around my house at night wearing a too small tshirt and underwear it makes me feel like the slutty girl who dies first in a horror movie

[zungenakrobatik]

getting sad at night for no reason is my best talent

[weaver-z]

It's hilarious to me that Al Capone was an amazing tipper. I get why it took so long to catch him.

[weaver-z]

Me and the other caddies watching Al Capone beat a guy to death with a golf club after he gave each of us the 2022 equivalent of $1600

[3000s]

all food is "guilt free" to me because i love foods and treats and snacks and drinks forever and ever amen

[pumpkinspicebluntwrap]

Let’s hear it for bagel & cream cheese

[itsjustminormending]

[snoppy]

Yo mr white i hope you're cursed forever to sleep on a twin sized mattress in somebody's attic or basement your whole life bitch

[tomgirlhysteria-deactivated2023]

i will never understand swifties. listen to lana del rey like a normal person

[weaver-z]

[fullhalalalchemist]

So you're telling me for decades people from all walks of life made fun of teenage girls for being stans, from the Beatles to BTS, and made teenage girls out to be these wild out of pocket intense fans of Cute Boys, all for turning red to come out and people to act like they have never heard of of a girl being into anything in their entire life???

[weaver-z]

It's hilarious to me that Al Capone was an amazing tipper. I get why it took so long to catch him.

[weaver-z]

Me and the other caddies watching Al Capone beat a guy to death with a golf club after he gave each of us the 2022 equivalent of $1600

[chaoticgouda]

I’m sorry milord, but the peasants are nailing erotic artwork of you and your court jester to the church doors again

[fieldbears]

and the ship name, squire? what is the ship name

[wetchickenbreast]

Tumblr should add polls so I can force my followers to make all my major live decisions for me

[magical-agatha]

positive catgirl affirmation: your claws and teeth are SO sharp. you CAN destroy anything you want. you DESERVE headpats. you ARE full of incredible CHAOS and VIOLENCE.

[calamitys-child]

I truly am obsessed with how Knives Out was like. Hello Daniel Craig, man who has spent the past two decades of his career being alternately beaten up and objectified playing an action hero with no personality. Would you like to please put on a shirt and an incomprehensible vaguely Texan accent and flex your character acting dark comedy muscles as well as your pecs for a while. And he’s like BOY WOULD I and they made a work of art. Also love that they put Chris Evans in sweaters. Get your beefcakes then dress them nice make them soft and give them some bonkers character work to do it’s what cinema needs more of

[calamitys-child]

I love that several people have responded to this with “op I forgive you cause you’re Scottish but that’s not a Texan accent” which is fair thank you I appreciate it but no two people have agreed on what accent it is which is also Absolutely fair and hilarious as a reaction to this film

[calamitys-child]

Cannot stress enough that I do not know what the fuck a foghorn leghorn is but literally a hundred people have said it to me so far so I’m assuming it’s important to, like, Americans

[not100bees]

[public-universal-sister]

You can’t spell silly without ill, and baby? I’m diseased.

[evilbuildingsblog]

Evil UFO disguised as local McPlace.

[yourbloodinmine-deactivated2015]

[whats-good-young-hoe]

Hold on, let me put away fucking Henry VIII’s milk

[professorfuntimes]

You milked Henry VIII?!?

[vulgarweed]

You MILK Henry VIII? You pump his titties like the bovine? oh! oh! The Tower for blogger! The Tower for blogger for One Thousand Beheadings!!!!