hello hali!!! may i please have a soonyoung fic rec list from u??
another list from the one and the only @haologram she reads more than me ok!!!
backrooms by @seungkw1 (i actually did read this i love it)
eyes of pierrot by @miniseokminnies (on my immediate tbr - heard wonderful things)
about you by @haologram (I actually did read this and its wonderful)
elevetory by @wqnwoos
untitled drabble by @wqnwoos
love surge by @wheeboo
you're alright, i guess by @wheeboo
for a good time call by @aeristudios
the athlete by @aeristudios
caller #17 by @aeristudios
while hes gone by @100vern (THIS LIVES IN MY BRAIN RENT FREE)
in the zone by @100vern
with the band by @starlightkyeom
right where you left me by @starlightkyeom
kitty by @aeristudios
never shall we die by @gyuswhore (my fave hoshi series of all time)
where do stars go by @imnotshua
12 wishes by @etherealyoungk
to be loved is to be known by @etherealyoungk
playing with fire @starlightkyeom
adore u by @joshujin (FAVE OF ALL TIME)
heartbreak champion by @straylightdream
crash course in romance by @etherealyoungk
Warnings: Insecure reader (thighs), heavy thigh praise/obsession, soft dom Mingyu vibes, suggestive content, established relationship, lots of skinship & reassurance
Song to set the vibe: Best Part â Daniel Caesar ft. H.E.R.
You stood in front of the full-length mirror in Mingyuâs bedroom, tugging at the hem of your oversized shirt. It barely covered the top of your thighs, and no matter how many times you adjusted it, you still felt⊠exposed. Too soft. Too thick. Not the long, toned legs you saw on every idol and influencer.
You sighed, turning sideways. Why canât they just be smaller? The thought was automatic now, a quiet little voice that followed you into every dressing room and every summer outfit.
Strong arms suddenly wrapped around your waist from behind, pulling you back against a warm, solid chest. You didnât even hear him come in.
âBaby,â Mingyu murmured, voice still husky from sleep, lips brushing the shell of your ear. âWhat are you doing?â
âNothing,â you lied, trying to pull the shirt down further.
He hummed, unconvinced. His hands slid down to rest on your hips, thumbs gently stroking the skin just under the hem. Then lower. His palms cupped the sides of your thighs like they were made to fit there.
âYouâre staring at my favorite part of you again,â he said softly.
Your cheeks burned. âGyuâŠâ
âNo, listen.â He turned you around to face him, tilting your chin up so you had to meet those big, earnest eyes.
âIâve been obsessed with these thighs since the first time you let me put my head on your lap during movie night. Remember?â
You nodded shyly.
âI kept thinking⊠how soft. How warm. How perfectly they squish when I grab them.â
His hands demonstrated, squeezing gently, reverently.
âTheyâre so fucking pretty.â
You tried to look away, but he chased your gaze.
âI know you donât like them,â he said, quieter now. âI see the way you hide them under long clothes even when itâs hot. But baby⊠they drive me crazy. In the best way.â
He walked you backwards until the back of your knees hit the bed, then gently pushed you down so you were sitting. Mingyu dropped to his knees in front of you like it was the most natural thing in the world.
His large hands parted your thighs just enough for him to settle between them, cheek resting against one like it was a pillow.
âSee?â he whispered, turning his head to press a slow kiss to the inside of your thigh. âPerfect.â
Your breath hitched.
His lips were so warm, so deliberate. He kissed again, a little higher, then sucked lightly, just enough to make your fingers thread through his hair.
âMingyuââ
âHm?â He looked up at you through his lashes, eyes dark but so full of love it made your chest ache.
âTell me if you want me to stop.â
You didnât.
He took his time, mapping every inch like he was memorizing you. Kissing the stretch marks you hated, tracing the softness with his tongue, squeezing the plush flesh between his fingers while groaning like it was him getting spoiled.
âLove how they shake when I do this,â he murmured, giving a playful jiggle before kissing the spot again. âLove how they wrap around me so tight when youâre riding my face.
Love how they look with my hands all over them. Theyâre mine, yeah?â
You nodded, voice small. âYours.â
âThatâs right.â He nipped gently, then soothed it with his tongue. âDonât ever hide them from me. I want to see them in my shirts. In your little shorts. In nothing. All the time.â
He climbed up onto the bed, pulling you on top of him so you were straddling his waist. His hands immediately returned to your thighs, spreading them wider over him, thumbs rubbing circles into the soft skin.
âYouâre so beautiful it hurts sometimes,â he said, almost to himself. âAnd these thighs? Theyâre my weakness. My safe place. My favorite thing to hold onto when the world feels too loud.â
You leaned down to kiss him, slow and deep, and he sighed into your mouth like heâd been waiting for it all morning. When you pulled back, his hands were still kneading your thighs possessively.
âGonna make you love them as much as I do,â he promised, voice low. âOne kiss at a time if I have to.â
You laughed softly, burying your face in his neck. He smelled like home warm skin, faint cologne, and safety.
And for the first time in a long time, when his hands stayed glued to your thighs, stroking and holding like he couldnât bear to let go⊠you didnât want to pull away.
End.
Hope this hits the spot, anon đ Mingyu would so be the type to turn your insecurities into his favorite obsession.
vinyl, punk rock, and a little bit of love â yjh
đżđ§ playlist
PAIRING: campus DJ!jeonghan x f!reader
GENRE: friends to lovers, college au, 2000s au
WC: 16,816
WARNINGS: weed/alcohol consumption, discussion of mental illness, bit o jealousy, angst, idiots in love, semi-public sex but like barely, dry humping, fingering, oral, multiple orgasms, petnames (baby), cum swallowing, lots of whimpering u already know!!!!!, jun cameo and he's real weird again!! (/pos), i made up a bunch of terrible fake band names enjoy
A/N: written for @studiosvt's First Time Caller collab! be sure to check out all the other banger fics on the masterlist! i had a blast writing this, loser emo boi jeonghan was not something i knew i needed but i fear i am now in love with him. btw, this fic is set in 2003! peak era for this genre of music if u ask me :) shoutout to the homie @haologram for beta reading, u da best fr ily <3
SYNOPSIS: You met Jeonghan freshman year of college â he seemed a bit strange at first, shy and a bit elusive, but you two instantly became friends when you bonded over your love of alternative music and record stores. You wouldn't necessarily call him your best friend, but as friendships and relationships came and went over the years, Jeonghan was always a constant in your life. It's junior year now, and you're trying to convince him to apply for the open DJ position at the campus radio station. WFVC 90.5 is known for being the hotspot for underground punk music, and with Jeonghan majoring in communications studies you know it's the perfect role for him. He gets the job, and you figure you'd be seeing a lot less of him now that he's busy working the late night shift at the station. But it's quite the opposite â you're spending more time with Jeonghan than ever before, and you start to realize there might be something more than friendship on the horizon for you two.
[ONE]
Filtered sunlight beaming through the treetops hits your eyes as you step out into the quad, making you squint in the sudden brightness that starkly contrasts the dim interior of the Literature Hall you were just in. The air is crisp â not yet chilly, but fresh and invigorating, a tell-tale sign of fall being right around the corner. The quad is buzzing with life, students chattering as they stroll to class, bikes zipping past you on the sidewalk, every bench and shaded spot under a tree occupied with people laughing, reading, relaxing. You leisurely make your way over to your usual spot, but as you approach the small oak near the Communications Building you see two girls you don't recognize sitting in the grass beneath its low branches. Puzzled, you look around, but then you spot a familiar lanky figure standing outside the Comms building. His back is turned to you, so all you can see is the mess of long dark hair upon his head, but the baggy flannel shirt and the black backpack adorned with various pins and patches slung over one shoulder are a dead giveaway. As you head in his direction, you see he appears to be staring straight ahead at a lamppost.
"Hey dork, I was looking for you," you call out playfully as you walk toward him, but he doesn't seem to hear you. Getting closer, you spot the pair of headphones on his head, the wire plugged into the portable CD player in his hand â the loud, raucous sounds of Linkin Park blaring in his ears tinnily resonating through the air from halfway across the sidewalk. When you get within arm's reach you tug on the handle of his backpack. He nearly jumps out of his skin, whipping around and yanking the headphones off his head with a startled expression on his face. When he sees it's you, he relaxes, but not without majorly rolling his eyes.
"Jesus, you fucking scared me," he sighs. He lifts the CD player in his hand and pauses the song, the banging melody ringing through the foam-covered headphones ceasing.
"Sorry," you apologize, but a wide grin spreads on your face. "I didn't think you'd react that much. What are you doing, anyway?" you ask, looking over to the lamppost.
"Nothing," he says quickly, but a flier with bold text catches your eye.
Do you like punk music? Do you like radio?
WFVC 90.5 is HIRING for a DJ position!
No experience necessary, Communications majors preferred.
APPLY NOW at the station (Comms Building 2nd Floor)
"Oh my god, Jeonghan this is perfect!" you exclaim, but your friend shakes his head.
"I was just looking."
"Dude, you HAVE to apply. This is literally your dream job!"
Jeonghan frowns. "I doubt they would hire me."
"What the hell are you talking about? You're exactly the person they're looking for," you tell him. And it's true â Foxville College's singular radio station may be a local joint, but it's famous across all of Wisconsin for being the station for underground grunge, punk, and alternative rock. You've been listening to it since you were a kid, and its where your love of the genres originated. Jeonghan happens to share the exact same music taste â it's how you became friends in the first place back in Freshman year.
"Hey!" Jeonghan calls after you as you both exit the same building. You had just came from the same class, Intro to Poetry, but it's the very first day of school, so he doesn't know your name. But he saw your notebook fall out of your half-open backpack, and you didn't notice it.
He picks up the small, black leather notebook and quickly zips after you. "Excuse me," he tries again, but you're wearing headphones. Your music is loud, and familiar. He taps on your shoulder, startling you slightly.
"Hi, sorry," Jeonghan tells you as you turn to face him, shifting the headphones off one ear so you can hear. "You dropped this." You look at his hands as he extends the notebook to you.
"Oh! That is mine," you remark, taking your headphones off fully now and pausing your music.
"Yeah, your backpack was open."
You look over your shoulder, and sure enough, the bag is half-unzipped.
"Whoops," you tell him with a lighthearted laugh, taking the notebook and putting it back in the bag, making sure to close it all the way this time. "Well, thank you, I appreciate it," you say with a friendly smile. You go to put your headphones back on and walk away, but before you can do so he points at your portable CD player.
"Are you listening to Green Day?" he asks.
"Oh, yeah! I am!" you reply excitedly. "It's the Dookie album, one of my faves."
"That album is so good," he agrees with a smile. "I don't mean this in a rude way or anything," he says shyly. "But you I wouldn't have guessed you'd be into punk music."
"Yeah, I get that a lot," you say with a laugh. "I don't particularly dress very edgy or anything. Maybe I should start dressing the part."
"Wear whatever you want," he responds with a shrug. "The most punk rock thing you can do is be yourself."
"That's very true," you grin back at him. "I'm y/n, by the way."
"I'm Jeonghan," he replies with a soft smile. "It's nice to meet you."
And so you and Jeonghan quickly became friends. He's a pretty quiet guy, very much the opposite of your bubbly, sociable self; but despite your differences you get along well. He's also pretty much the only person you know who likes the same type of music as you, so you definitely share a close bond over that.
"Besides," you say to Jeonghan. "You really should get a job anyway."
"Hey!" he pouts. "Are you calling me broke?"
"Yes. Because you are."
The left corner of his mouth lifts slightly, giving you a half-grin. "So are you, moron."
You playfully give him a light punch in the arm. "Takes one to know one."
"I'll think about it," he concedes.
"You better. If not then I'll submit the application for you."
"Pretty sure that's not allowed," he replies, raising a brow at you.
"Like that's gonna stop me," you inform him.
"Unfortunately, I believe that," he chuckles, rolling his eyes again. "Anyway, c'mon," he says to as he starts walking off. "I have a surprise for you."
"Oh god, what have you done now?" you pretend to complain as you follow after him.
"No no, you're gonna like this one," he grins. "I promise."
"Okay, well now I know where we're going," you say as Jeonghan turns onto Harton Street. The street boasts a Dead End sign, and it's path is winding. You can't see much past the trees, but you know there is only one reason to come down this way.
"I was here over the weekend," you inform him. "I don't need to buy anything else."
"Oh please, like you'd pass up the opportunity to get some new vinyl," he grins.
"Dude, I'm already living off ramen."
"Just trust me."
"Okaaay," you reply, feigning skepticism. "If you say so."
The tires of Jeonghan's 1991 Mercury Tracer crunch as he turns off the main road onto a white gravel drive. A humble building comes into view, its exterior painted pastel yellow with a giant sign reading TURNPIKE RECORDS in a large, swirling font that looks straight out of the 1970s. A neon sign resides in the window, flickering slightly but advertising that the shop is open. There's only one other car in the small lot: a pristine, hot red Chevy Camaro also straight out of the 70s, belonging to the shop's owner.
Jeonghan parks the car and the two of you head into the store. The front door squeaks as you open it, an assortment of small bronze bells hanging above the door ringing out to announce your entry. The familiar, slightly-musty scent of the used record store fills your nose as you walk down the three steps taking you to the shop floor. Aside from the natural light from the window, the place is pretty dim, lit mainly by a couple of bare bulbs hanging from the ceiling and a variety of glowing lava lamps of all shapes, sizes, and colors placed throughout the room. Nearly every inch of wall is covered in a hodge-podge of framed posters and photographs, giving the whole place a chaotic but vibrant feel. Without a doubt, this is your favorite spot in town.
"I wonder if they have the new Muse album yet," you comment, meandering through the empty shop over to the Rock section.
"Not yet," Jeonghan replies as he starts flipping through a nearby discount bin. "I checked already."
You hear a faint swoosh come from behind you. You turn around to see a tall, heavily-tattooed man carrying a large box emerging from the thick velvet curtain that leads to the back of the store â none other than the shop's owner, Tripp. He's in his mid-40s, bald except for a long goatee on his chin, and he has more earrings than you can even count.
"Hey hey, I thought I heard my favorite customers out here!" Tripp says cheerfully when he sees you and Jeonghan. He sets the box on top of the counter, brushing his hands off and coming out to greet you on the floor.
"Oh please, you say that to everyone," you grin at the man.
"Definitely not," he shakes his head. "Besides, between the both of you you guys are keeping me in business. Speaking of," he says as he suddenly snaps and points at you. "I got something for ya."
He quickly returns to the counter and retrieves something from the shelves beneath the register. He walks back to you and hands you an album, light gray in color. You flip it over, and your jaw drops. It's a Japanese edition of Led Zeppelin IV â your favorite album of all time.
"Your friend told me you've been looking for this one," he tells you, nodding his head in Jeonghan's direction. "He convinced me to set it aside for you."
"Wow, that's so nice thank you!!" you tell Tripp excitedly. "How much?"
"Don't worry about it. It's already paid for."
"What?!"
You look over at Jeonghan, but he just smiles back at you sheepishly.
"What the hell, thank you," you grin at him. "You did not have to do that though."
"Actually, I did," Jeonghan admits. "Tripp made me."
Tripp lets out a hearty laugh. "Well regardless, I'm glad it's in the hands of someone I know will really appreciate it."
"Let me pay you back," you say to Jeonghan as Tripp returns to restocking, but he just shakes his head.
"Don't worry about it, really," he tells you warmly.
"Okay, fine. But you're gonna come over and listen to this with me," you insist, poking him in the chest. "We can smoke and I'll order pizza."
Jeonghan's face lights up. "Sounds like a deal to me," he grins.
brrrrrrr
brrrrrrr
The dull trill of the phone rings in your ear as you wait for the call to connect. You've only hit the bong once, but your head already feels like you're floating in the clouds. You mindlessly twirl the cord around your index finger, and you're halfway zoned out by the time the other line picks up.
"Arthur's Pizzeria," a cheerful voice suddenly speaks into your ear. "How can I help you?"
"Yeah hi!" you blurt out in your mildly startled state. "Can I order one large pepperoni pizza with extra cheese for delivery?"
"You got it! What's the address?"
"22 Elmwood Street, Unit 201."
"Great! It'll be about 20 minutes."
With a click you set the handset back onto the hook, returning to the living room. Your roommate won't be back until later, so you two have the place to yourselves â perfect for getting high and lazing around without judgment. Jeonghan sits on the couch, sinking into the cushions already and staring off into space. It takes him a moment to register that you're back; when he notices you, he tries to sit up, but the effort required for it currently seems monumental.
"Pizza ordered?" he asks, peering at you through lazy eyelids.
"Yup," you reply as you plop onto the other end of the couch. "Be here in 20."
"Sweet," he grins. You reach for the bong, grabbing the lighter next to it and lighting a bit more of the bowl. After a decently fat rip and a few solid coughs, you extend it out to Jeonghan.
"Man, I'm so high already," he groans, but he takes the colorful swirled glass from your hand anyway. "Where'd you get this grass?"
"Got it from Joshua," you reply, lifting your feet up onto the couch and tucking them beside you.
"Oh," Jeonghan replies, giving you a look as he exhales a cloud of smoke and hands the bong back over.
"What's your deal with Joshua?" you question, raising your brow at him.
"What? Nothing," he says quickly. "We should open a window."
He gets to his feet and walks across the room, lifting the nearest window up as far as it will go. It's a nice evening â the crisp air from earlier has gotten cooler, but it feels delightful as it begins to drift into the apartment in the light breeze.
"I know you don't like him," you continue, not letting Jeonghan ignore your question. "But I've never known why."
"I never said I didn't like him," he denies, flopping back onto the couch.
"You didn't have to," you point out. "Your face says it all."
He grimaces, rolling his eyes. "Curse my expressive nature. Anyway, I dunno, he just always seems like he's trying to make a move on you."
"Oh, he's like that with everyone," you reply matter-of-factly.
"Right."
"He is," you affirm. "And besides, so what if he was?"
"Huh?" Jeonghan pipes up, seemingly surprised by your question. "Oh, I just mean⊠I just don't trust guys who are always talking to girls that. Seems sleazy."
"No, really," you reiterate. "He's like that with everyone."
"Okay," he concedes skeptically. "If you say so."
"Should we play some Zeppelin?" you ask, getting up to go grab the record. Jeonghan's face lights up.
"Fuck yeah," he grins.
You put the album on, the signature bold, heavy sounds of the band greeting your ears as you crank up the volume. As you sit there listening, you finish off the bowl with Jeonghan, the air of your apartment now completely overtaken by smoke despite the open window.
"When's that damn pizza gonna get here?" he mumbles, but before you can even respond you hear a knock coming from the front door.
"Whoa, you summoned it," you giggle, rising to your feet a bit too quickly and stumbling slightly on your way over to the door. You answer, having a quick conversation with the usual delivery boy before paying and scurrying back over to the couch, the heavenly smell of hot, greasy pepperoni pizza joining the weed aroma in the room. You don't even bother with plates, instead simply picking up the slices and shoveling them directly into your hungry mouths. The conversation remains paused for a few minutes; you zone out, letting yourself get lost in the music, but eventually your conversation with Jeonghan earlier pops back into your head.
"You really should apply to that DJ job," you say, turning to him, but he just shrugs.
"Eh, I don't think I'd get it."
"Not with that attitude you won't."
"You always say that," he rolls his eyes.
"It's true!" you insist. "Jeonghan, come on. This is basically your dream job, and you're literally the perfect guy for it. Just apply and see what happens!"
"Maybe, I dunno."
"Besides," you add. "You need the money to fund your poor spending habits."
"Hey!" he balks. "I do not have poor spending habits."
You pick up the vinyl sleeve, tapping the little yellow sticker on the cover with a messy $40 scribbled on it in black ink.
"Yeah, you do."
He groans, letting his head fall back into the couch. "You're so annoying," he says to you with a grin.
"Takes one to know one," you tease back. He grabs the nearest throw pillow, lobbing it at you and hitting you in the arm.
"Okay, I probably earned that," you admit with a laugh.
The current song ends, the gentle guitar strums of "Stairway to Heaven" filling your ears as the iconic song begins.
"Oh shit, shut up," you tell Jeonghan, launching the pillow right back at him. He jumps slightly as the unexpected pillow hits him in the chest with a soft thump. "I fucking love this song."
He is about to tell you that duh, everybody with a brain loves this song â but your eyes are closed already, bobbing your head slightly to the beat, clearly already lost in it; so he just shakes his head, chuckling silently to himself.
The both of you feel like you're drifting to a higher plane as the song progresses, fully immersed in the grand crescendo you've both heard so many times yet have never tired of. When it ends, your eyes flutter open again, finding Jeonghan fully sunk into the other end of the couch. You start to wonder if he actually fell asleep, but then he lifts his head, opening his eyes to look at you.
"You know how some people say a hot dog is a sandwich?" he asks. You stare at him for a moment, trying to comprehend in your inebriated state what it was he just said.
"Who the fuck says that?" you inquire once you finally process his question.
"I dunno. People."
"Stupid people, maybe."
"I mean, yeah," he agrees. "But like⊠do you think pizza is a sandwich?"
You stare at him for a moment. "What?"
"I don't know, it's got bread and cheese and meat and tomatoes, right? Those things go on sandwiches."
"You're high as shit, dumbass," you tell him.
"Okay, well watch this!" He reaches over to the pizza box and picks up a new slice. Turning to show it to you, he slowly folds it in half. "See? That's a sandwich!"
"Oh shut the fuck up," you reply, but you can't help but laugh.
Jeonghan munches on his pizza-sandwich while you reach for your stash, refilling the bowl and lighting up again. When he finishes, you hand the bong over.
"Not like either of us needs it, but whatever man," you say with a pleased grin.
With heavy, banging drum beats, the last song on the album begins to play. This one has always been Jeonghan's favorite, you recall despite being astronomically faded. You glance over at him, finding him staring out the open window into the now-dark night. Certainly not out of the ordinary, but something about him in this moment seems⊠sad, almost. He notices you watching him, but he seems to have become self-conscious, averting your gaze.
"What's on your mind?"
Jeonghan continues staring out the window, but he lets out a small sigh.
"Do you ever think about how big the universe is?" he asks. "And then it makes you realize how small and meaningless we really are?"
You pause for a minute, considering the gravity of his question.
"No, not really," you finally answer gently. "Are you feeling okay?"
"Yeah, I'm fine," he answers instinctively; but after thinking about it for a moment, he adds: "But sometimes I wonder if I'm not."
"In what way?"
"Just⊠the whole entire world feels impossibly huge, yet Earth is just a tiny pale blue dot compared to the whole galaxy. In the grand scheme of things, we're nothing. Nothing we do matters."
"I don't think that's true at all."
Jeonghan finally looks over to you, staring at you curiously.
"But how? How can anything have any meaning if we are so tiny?"
"I think that makes everything all that much more meaningful," you reply. "Like⊠the universe is so huge and vast and yet here we are, chillin' together, existing at just the right time to eat pizza and listen to Zepp. I just think that's a really nice thought."
"Hmm," he mumbles, opening his mouth to say something else â but his words never come. At this point he is so physically relaxed that he seems fused to the couch.
"You're fuckin' blasted, dude," you giggle, reaching over and shaking him playfully.
"Am nottttt," he pouts, but moments later he starts giggling too. "Okay, fine, I am. But, I guess I've just never thought of it that way before."
The album ends, the room falling silent. You get up, casually shuffling over to your ever-growing collection of records that is now taking up the entire corner of the small living room.
"What next?" you ask Jeonghan over your shoulder.
"Surprise me."
You peruse through your titles, not sure exactly what you're looking for; but then one catches your eye.
"Ooh, got it," you say with a grin. You replace the vinyl on the turntable and set the needle in position, the sounds of Dookie by Green Day playing aloud in the room, making Jeonghan smile too.
[TWO]
You stroll through the library, exiting the stacks to make your way to your next class. On your way out, you're surprised to spot Jeonghan, sitting alone at one of the tables. Unexpected â as he usually spends most of his free time out in the quad or in the Comms Building's study space; if he's in the library, it's usually just to take a nap. He has a book on the desk beside him, but it's closed, and he instead seems to be intensely focused on a piece of paper, brow furrowed and deep in thought. You walk over to him, but he doesn't notice you approaching. As you near the desk you can see the word APPLICATION in bold font at the top of the paper.
"Yay, you're doing it!!" you say to him as you appear beside him, shaking him by the shoulder excitedly and making him nearly fly out of his seat.
"Jesus Christ you have got to stop sneaking up on me!" he yelps quietly, but it still earns him a glare from a nearby librarian. She raises her finger to her lips, shushing the two of you before going back to re-shelving books. You sit down in the chair next to him, scooting in close enough so you can whisper.
"This is so exciting!" you tell him in a hushed voice, but he sighs, shaking his head.
"I'm not even sure if I'm gonna turn it in," he admits.
"What? Dude, you're halfway there, just finish and go turn it in!"
"I don't know," he frowns. "They're probably just gonna laugh at me."
You raise your brow at him. "Why on earth would you think they'd do that?"
"Most people do," he shrugs.
"Well, even if they do â which they won't â who cares?" you question. "Just follow your dreams, don't let other people get in the way."
The librarian turns around again, her displeased glare telling you you're still being too loud for her liking.
"C'mon," you say to Jeonghan. "Finish up your application and let's get out of here."
He quickly fills out the rest of the form and you ditch the library together. Jeonghan is done with classes for the day, but he accompanies you across the quad to your next class.
"What are you up to tonight?" he asks. He kicks a pebble along the sidewalk as he walks; you watch his dingy old converse scuff against the ground as he does, noticing the small hole forming in the toe of his right shoe.
"I'm getting dinner with Mark," you reply casually. You see his face drop slightly out of the corner of your eye.
"Basketball team Mark?"
"Yep! We have History of Feminist Literature together, though he's a Economics major so he's just taking it for an elective."
"Hm," Jeonghan says out loud without meaning to.
"What?"
"Oh, nothing. You just hardly ever go on dates, that's all."
"Oh, it's not a date," you say plainly, but you see him roll his eyes. "It's not!!" you insist. "We're just friends."
"I doubt he sees it that way."
"And how would you know that?"
"Because dudes only think with their dicks."
"Are you speaking from experience?" you inquire teasingly.
"This is not about me," he mutters, looking mildly embarrassed as he avoids eye contact. Luckily for him, you've arrived at the Literature Hall, giving him an excuse to change the subject.
"Hope you have a good class," he tells you warmly.
"Thanks," you reply with a smile. "Now you go turn in that job application or I'm going to kick your ass."
"I will," he laughs.
"Pinky promise?" you ask, extending your hand. He chuckles, but he connects pinkies with you.
"I promise."
"Good!" you tell him with a grin. "See ya later!"
"See ya," he smiles back.
You unlock your front door quietly, trying not to make noise and wake up your roommate considering how late it is by now. But as you enter the apartment you see her sitting at the computer, back turned to you as she is absorbed in whatever is on the screen.
"Hey, I didn't think you'd still be up," you say as you shut the door and kick your shoes off.
"Oh hey," Mina replies as she turns around to greet you. She lifts her wrist to peer at her watch. "Damn, I didn't realize how late it was."
"What are you doing on the computer?" you inquire, walking over to the desk out of curiosity.
"It's this new MySpace website Irene told me about," she replies, turning back around and double-clicking on something. "It's so sick, I've been here all night making my profile."
"Oh yeah, I've heard of that," you tell her as you watch her scroll through her profile. "Seems pretty cool."
"You should make one!" she tells you. "I can add you to my Top 8 friends."
"Oh, maybe. I'm still getting used to this whole Internet thing, honestly," you laugh.
"Soooo," Mina starts, shutting down the computer and heading into the kitchen. "How was your date with Mark?"
"It wasn't a date," you tell her. "I don't know why everyone keeps saying that."
"Okay, whatever," she responds, browsing through the snack cabinet for a minute before deciding on the bag of Cheeto Puffs. "How was your not-date?"
"It was⊠good."
"You don't sound so sure about that."
"No, it was!" you assure her. "It's just that⊠I don't know, he kinda just talked about basketball the whole time."
"Ugh. Typical guy shit," Mina rolls her eyes.
"He's really nice, thoughâŠ" you say, though you're not sure if you're trying to convince her or yourself more.
"Nice enough to go on a second date â sorry, not-date with?" she raises her brow at you.
"Well, I don't know about thatâŠ"
You sigh, feeling a bit dejected suddenly. It's not like you're trying to date or anything, but you can't deny that it would be kinda nice to have at least a little bit more success.
"Maybe I should just give up on dating," you grimace.
Mina pops another Cheeto in her mouth. "I mean, I don't know why you bother. You basically already have a BF."
"What?" you ask, puzzled. "No I don't?"
"C'mon, you're literally hanging out with what's-his-name all the time. The metalhead."
"Jeonghan?? He's not into metal."
"Okay, whatever noise it is you guys listen to."
"It's called punk, and it's cool."
"Riiight."
"Anyway, he's just my friend," you tell her. Her lips curve into a slight grin, and she gives you a look.
"Sure he is."
"I can be friends with dudes!"
"Dudes only think with their dicks," she retorts, echoing Jeonghan's exact words from earlier.
"He's not like that," you assure her.
"Well that's rare, if true. Maybe you should date him."
You roll your eyes, but you're tired. Mina means well, but you don't really feel like having this conversation right now. Luckily, she's already putting her snack away, and then heads off to her room.
"Anyway, I'm off to bed. Goodnight!"
You too head off to bed, but as you brush your teeth you start to think about what Mina said. What if Jeonghan does see me as more than a friend? you wonder to yourself. After all, he did say the exact same thing earlier, too. You don't think he meant it in that way, but now you're beginning to second-guess your intuitionâŠ
You go straight to bed, deciding not to think about it anymore tonight.
[THREE]
You have some time between classes, so you take up residence in your usual spot in the quad, sitting on the ground reclined against your usual tree. Fall is officially here now, and it's a bit cold out, but you're perfectly comfortable in your thick sweater and windbreaker. Out of the corner of your eye, you suddenly see something in the distance charging directly at you. Looking up from your book, you see Jeonghan, forgoing the sidewalks and sprinting across the grass straight toward you, waving and flailing his arms like a maniac.
"You look like a psychopath," you call to him as he approaches.
"I got it!!!"
"Got whaâ wait, the DJ job?!" you perk up excitedly.
"YES!!"
He plops down on the ground next to you, out of breath from running, but he doesn't seem to notice or care.
"Holy shit, congrats!!" you tell him enthusiastically. "See, I told you you'd get it!"
"I can't believe I almost ripped up the application and threw it in the trash."
"Jeonghan!" you blurt out, hitting him playfully in the arm, but he just shakes his head and laughs.
"I didn't though! You made me pinky promise."
"This is amazing! When do you start?"
"Tonight, actually," he answers. "Unfortunately, I'm stuck on the late night shift since I'm a newbie â 10pmâ4am."
"Oh, yikes," you reply concernedly, but he shrugs it off.
"It's fine," he smiles. "I don't sleep anyway."
"Damn, I guess I'm never gonna see you again," you say jokingly, but an unexpected wave of sadness washes over you as your own words sink in.
"No way," he shakes his head resolutely. "We're still gonna hang out. I'll find a way to make it happen."
A fluttering sensation hits your stomach. You hang out with Jeonghan all the time, so you're not sure why you'd have this reaction. But something about the way he said it â "I'll find a way"â feels⊠different. But, regardless, you're just glad you're still going to be able to see your friend.
"What are you doing until then?" you inquire.
"I was just gonna go grab a bite at the dining hall and then go nap in the library."
"Wanna go to Jacq's instead?" you ask. "My treat."
Jeonghan's face lights up. "Hell yeah," he grins. "That sounds like a way better idea."
The low hum of neon lights buzzes gently through the tune of the usual rotation of 1960s hits as you and Jeonghan sit in the corner booth, chatting and giggling over your meal. Jacqueline's Diner is an old-fashioned joint, and the majority of its clientele is over the age of 60 â but the food is cheap, greasy, and delicious, so the two of you are practically regulars. Jeonghan ordered his usual, chicken tenders and a Cherry Coke float; you opted for a grilled cheese and chocolate milkshake, and you ordered a basket of fries to share.
"You heard about this MySpace?" Jeonghan asks, dipping three large, salty fries in ketchup and shoving them all into his mouth at once.
"Oh yeah," you say, picking the maraschino cherry off the top of the whipped cream and eating it one bite. "Mina's on there, she told me about it. Seems pretty cool."
"I think it sounds lame," he shrugs indifferently.
"What? Why?"
"I dunno, the whole Top 8 friends is kinda weird. Just sounds like one big popularity contest if you ask me."
"Yeah, I guess so," you agree.
"Besides, I don't even have eight friends."
"Oh shut up," you retort. "That's not true!"
"It's okay," Jeonghan chuckles. "I'm just not the kind of guy who has a lot of friends."
"We'll I'd put you in my Top 8," you tell him, but he rolls his eyes. "It's true, I would!"
"C'mon, y/n," he laughs. "You have so many friends."
"Mmm, not really," you reply. "Not ones I hang out with on the regular, anyway. It's mostly you and Mina these days."
"Well, thanks for hanging out with me," he says sheepishly.
"You say that like it's a charity case," you tease him. "I hang out with you because I like you, moron."
Jeonghan says nothing, sipping on his float instead, but the big grin creeping across his face is undeniable.
"So," you ask after a bite of grilled cheese. "Are you excited?"
"For the job?"
"No, for Christmas," you reply jokingly. "Yes, the job!!"
"I guess so," he shrugs. "Mostly I'm just nervous."
"Why?"
"Because what if I'm bad at it and they fire me?"
"Jeonghan, that is not going to happen."
"But I don't know what I'm doing!" he frowns.
"Dude, nobody knows what they're doing when they start a new job," you remind him. "Besides, they're going to train you! You'll learn the ropes in no time."
"What if I don't?"
"I find that hard to believe. You're smarter than you give yourself credit for, Hannie. Stop being so hard on yourself."
"Easier said than done," he replies lightheartedly, but his lack of confidence still shows.
"Why is that?" you inquire.
He thinks for a moment. "I don't know," he eventually answers. "Sometimes it just feels like there's a little voice in my head telling me I suck at everything and that I should just give up."
"I worry about you sometimes."
"I'm okay, I promise," he smiles softly at you. "Sorry for being sad so much."
"You don't have to apologize for that," you tell him firmly. "You're my friend and I'm here for you no matter what."
A couple remaining fries sit at the bottom of the basket, calling to you from the red-and-white checkered paper lining. You reach for them, but Jeonghan does too, your hands colliding over the table.
"Ope, sorry," he says timidly, retracting his hand. "You can have it."
"No, you take it," you insist, sliding the basket toward him. "You've got a long night ahead of you, you need the fuel. Speaking of, want another float?"
"No, it's okaâ"
But you're already signaling to the waitress across the restaurant, pointing to Jeonghan's empty glass.
"I don't know why I asked," you tell him. "I already knew the answer."
The waitress quickly brings him a refill in a fresh glass, complete with his usual order of an extra cherry on top.
"Thanks, y/n," he smiles. "You're the best."
After you finish your meal and pay, Jeonghan drives you home. He pulls up next to the curb outside your apartment, putting the car into park and turning to face you.
"Thanks again for dinner," he smiles.
"Of course," you smile back. "I got ya. And I'll make sure to tune into WFVC tonight!"
Jeonghan chuckles, shaking his head. "I don't think I'm going to be on the air just yet. I think I gotta be less of a noob first."
"Well, I'll be thinking of you anyway," you tell him with a nod. He drops his head slightly, trying to hide his face behind his long hair.
"Besides, I wanna support the station â and maybe I'll find some new bands I like." You playfully give him a punch him in the arm. "Jut remember to relax, you're gonna crush it."
"I'll do my best," he promises.
"Good!" you nod, opening the passenger door and hopping out of the car. "Later skater," you smile at him, giving him a wave before shutting the door. He waves back, watching you walk toward your building, waiting until you've made it safely inside before shifting the car into gear and driving off.
[FOUR]
Jeonghan stands in the hallway, staring at the windowless, red door in front of him. He pulls a crumpled sticky note out of his jacket pocket, flattening it to reveal C-302 written in smudged pen. Looking up, he triple-checks the room number on the small metal plaque next to the door, but just as the first two times, it still reads C-302. The dozens of band stickers all over the door, some that look like they have been there for decades, are also a dead giveaway â this is it: the campus radio station. He takes a deep breath, exhaling slowly, then reaches for the door handle.
As the door swings open, a small, hectic room comes into view. Floor-to-ceiling shelves line every bit of wall, overflowing with endless stacks of CD cases; the rest of the room is crammed full of all sorts of audio and mixing equipment â some he recognizes, some he doesn't â and it seems that every bit of exposed surface is covered in show posters and even more band stickers. A too-small desk pushed against the far wall houses two computers, and at one of them sits a tough-looking man with a ponytail, seemingly older than himself, but not by much â perhaps a graduate student. The man peers up as Jeonghan enters the room.
"Hi, I'm Jeonghan," he says timidly. "I'm the new student employee, I was told to meet here at 9:45â"
"Yes, hello!" the man says cheerfully, hopping out of his seat and strutting across the room to give Jeonghan a very firm handshake. "I'm A.J., I'm the one running this joint for the most part â aside from Professor Sampson, of course. You're in undergrad, yeah?"
"Yes," Jeonghan replies politely, relieved that the man doesn't have the tough-guy demeanor he initially expected. "I'm a Junior."
"Awesome, well welcome to the team bro! Johnny's almost wrapped in the booth, and then you're on," he says, pointing his thumb back at the small window in the far wall; Jeonghan tries to peer through it, but all he can see is the top of the current DJ's head, clad with chunky headphones. "But don't worry â tonight I'll be showing you the ropes, so you just have to follow my lead. Cool?"
"Yeah, cool," Jeonghan nods in agreement.
"Excellent! Well, for starters, obviously we want to keep the volume to a minimum so there's no background noises when we're on air, but the soundproofing in the booth is good enough that you can talk at a regular volume out here and nobody's gonna hear ya. Just no screaming or anything crazy. As you can see over here," he says, pointing to the packed shelves. "We have quite a number of CDs on file. Now, I assume you're familiar with the station's catalogue?" Jeonghan nods, and A.J. continues. "Good. So you know we don't play anything that's even remotely popular â and if it's ever been on the radio, forget it. Most of our inventory is underground artists, garage bands, et cetera; the purpose of this station is to put a spotlight on new or small groups, show them some love and appreciation. So unless you're big into the local scene, you probably won't have heard of most of these bands."
Jeonghan skims over the nearest shelf, sure enough finding nothing familiar. Instead he finds jewel cases boasting all sorts of unheard-of band names â plunk!, Blister, Pisswizard, The Underwater Grandmas, and Groob, to name a few.
"Anyway, few ground rules. First, if the ON AIR sign is lit, you are live. Don't go saying anything you don't want hundreds of strangers to hear. Second, keep up with the queue, but also clean up after yourself. Don't leave loose CDs laying around, and make sure they go back into their actual cases â makes everyone's jobs easier."
Jeonghan nods attentively, trying not to seem nervous, but he feels like he's not doing a very good job. A.J. seems to notice too, but he claps Jeonghan on the shoulder and gives him a grin.
"Third, and this one's the most important if you ask me: just have fun. As long as you're doing a good job, just be yourself. Nothin' to stress over, I promise."
Jeonghan hears the booth door swing open; peering over A.J.'s shoulder, he sees a tall, dark-haired student stepping out into the main room.
"Ope, looks like we're on," A.J. says to him. "Johnny, this is Jeonghan, our new night shift guy."
Johnny walks over, shaking Jeonghan's hand enthusiastically. "Welcome! Nice to meet you, bro!"
"Thanks," Jeonghan replies, slightly intimidated by how friendly everyone is being, but he smiles politely at his new coworkers.
"Catch you guys 'round!" Johnny says as he takes off, giving the other two men a cheerful salute.
"Alright, the queue will be running for another 10 minutes or so," A.J. says as he enters the booth, pointing at the unlit ON AIR sign. "So in the meantime I can show you the basicsâŠ"
As promised, A.J. gives him the rundown, going over the master audio mixer controls, how to queue up songs, how to check the logs to see what's already been played, and a few different generic scripts for radio announcements.
"Like I said, you won't be talking on air just yet. But it's good for practice â and the more you practice the more natural it'll feel," he assures him. "Alright, we're coming up on the end of the queue. Grab some discs from that stack over there â doesn't matter which ones, really â and get them ready, I'll make the announcement." He places the bulky headphones on, pulling the mic in front of him and waiting for the song's outro begin to fade. He signals to Jeonghan as he goes live, the ON AIR sign lighting up bright red above their heads.
"That was 'Bitchcraft' by the Lipstick Dollz, and you're listening to WFVC 90.5 â the hottest place for underground punk and badass rock n' roll," A.J. speaks effortlessly into the mic. "Coming up next for you this hour, we've got some more Doomcock, a few from Spaceshuttle, and The Mary Jane Planes with their newest track, "Reefer Renegade" â only here on WFVC 90.5. Don't you dare touch that fuckin' tuner!"
The ON AIR sign shuts off, its red glow disappearing as the next song begins to play.
"See? Pretty easy," A.J. grins.
"Damn, that sounds so cool when you do it," Jeonghan tells him shyly.
"Don't sweat it, man. You'll get the hang of it in no time!"
Jeonghan isn't so sure, but he tries not to let the negative thoughts win. A.J. has him running the broadcast mixer, learning how to fade in and out and how to balance everything just right. He picks up on it faster than he expected, and the rest of the late-night shift seems to fly by. The job isn't the most exciting thing, but it's fun and interesting â and Jeonghan finds he enjoys even the monotony of mindlessly shelving CDs back into their places. But it seems that as soon as there's a lull in the job, you pop into his mind. By the time it's the middle of the night, he's certain you must have gone to bed by now â but he wonders if you were actually listening earlier. Did she like the music? he muses. Did she think of me at all?
He doesn't know the answer, but he really hopes you did.
The next day, Jeonghan doesn't show up to class.
You don't actually have any classes with him this semester, but after your Advanced Creative Writing class you always meet him in the quad underneath the usual tree. He's usually there first, so you waited for him for about 10 minutes â but he never showed.
Fortunately, his apartment is within walking distance from campus, so you make your way there. You knock on his door, but no response. You try again, a bit louder; after a few moments you hear footsteps from within the unit, shuffling their way toward the front door. The door swings open, revealing a messy-haired Jeonghan wearing pajamas, looking very much like you just woke him up.
"Have you been sleeping all day??" you ask with a grin.
"I guess so," he answers, placing his hand over his mouth as he yawns. "What time even is it?"
"3:23pm," you read from your wristwatch.
"Holy shit," he grumbles. "I slept through everything."
"You must've been exhausted," you point out. "Sorry for waking you up, I just wanted to make sure you were alive."
"No, no â don't apologize," he shakes his head. "Here, come on in," he says as he swings the door open, traipsing back into the apartment. "I'll make us some coffee."
You follow your sleepy friend into his kitchen, where he locates a bag of coffee grounds and starts to brew a fresh pot.
"Soooo," you say eagerly, sitting down at the kitchen table. It's stacked with books, CDs, piles of mail, and one very ripe-looking banana sitting atop a toppled box of Lucky Charms â but you're able to clear off enough space for two coffee mugs. "How was it? Tell me everything!"
"It was actually really good!" he responds enthusiastically, leaning against the counter. The warm aroma of hot coffee drifts across the room as the dark liquid begins to drip into the carafe. "Nothing particularly exciting, since I was just training. But it's all super cool, I think I'm really going to like it."
You haven't seen Jeonghan this excited about something since he scored tickets to the blink-182 concert last summer. He's become one of your closest friends, so you know that he's generally a bit of a melancholy guy â but seeing him so passionate about something really warms your heart. Happiness is a good look on him, you think to yourself.
"What's that look for?" he inquires, raising his brow at you.
"Nothing! I'm just really excited for you," you smile at him. "I was listening last night, you know."
His face lights up. "You were?" he asks eagerly The pot begins to sputter as the coffee finishes brewing; he grabs two mugs, filling them with the beverage: one cup black, for himself, and one with a tablespoon of sugar, for you.
"Of course! I said I was going to, didn't I?"
"You did," he smiles, bringing the mugs to the table and setting yours in front of you. You take a sip â it's piping hot, but it's delicious. "Didja hear any new songs you liked?"
"Yeah, I really liked all of it! There was one band called something weird that I enjoyed, I think it was 'Beenis'?"
Jeonghan laughs. "Yeah, I recall seeing a Beenis in the mix. Hey, speaking of new bandsâŠ"
He gets up, fetching his backpack and pulling a slightly-bent bright yellow piece of paper from it. He hands it to you, and you see that it's a flier for a show down at Dizzy's Tavern, a local dive bar known for it's cheap beer and loud, live rock music. The two bands listed are Fuckwagon and The Flagstaff Arizonas â names you've certainly never heard of before, but then again you're not too acquainted with the local music scene.
"My boss told me about this show tonight, apparently Fuckwagon are a pretty well-known name around the station. Said they're always bringing in new demos and singles for us to play," he explains. "I don't work tonight, and I don't know what you're up to, but I thought maybe we could go check it out."
"I'm down! I have nothing else going on today, and that sounds fun!"
"Sweet," Jeonghan replies casually, trying to contain his excitement, but his face is positively beaming. "I'll pick you up at 7:45, then?"
"Sounds like a plan," you grin back at him.
[FIVE]
Dizzy's Tavern is, for lack of better words, a shithole. As you step through the front door you are immediately hit with a wall of cigarette smoke that is somehow both stale and fresh. It's dark inside, the only source of lighting being the red lights above the bar and neon signs of various beer brands hanging around the walls; despite the dim environment, the dinginess of the establishment is still glaringly obvious. The place is a decent size, but it's packed â there are people of all ages, most of whom seem to be clad in leather jackets, and many with hair dyed unnatural colors or a multitude of piercings. The vibe of the place certainly screams punk.
"Holy shit, it's crowded," you remark to Jeonghan as you both shuffle into the crowded bar area.
"We don't have to stay if it's too muchâ" he quickly offers.
"No, it's okay!" you assure him. "I just think this will be more fun once I have a drink or two in me," you say lightheartedly.
"What do you want to drink?" he asks, grabbing onto your arm gently as you meander through the throng of bodies as not to get separated.
"Jack and Coke," you answer. He raises a brow at you.
"Oh so we're drinking drinking tonight," he smirks.
"Hey, you get whatever you want," you tell him, poking him in the chest. "You don't have to drink just because of me."
"Maybe I want to."
"Okay, just be careful though. I know how much of a lightweight you are."
"Hey!" he protests.
"Well, you are! Am I wrong?"
"No, you're right," he concedes with a smile. "As usual."
He finally gets the bartender's attention, ordering a Jack and Coke for the both of you. You sip it as you make your way through the crowd, holding onto Jeonghan as you head toward the small stage at the back of the bar. The band isn't on yet; according to the flier they should be on any minute now, but you have a feeling that being precisely punctual perhaps isn't very punk rock.
"Let's hang out here," you say, spotting a tiny, unoccupied high-top table off to the side. It's less crowded over here, and not too close to the stage. "I'm sure we will be able to hear just fine."
You're in the middle of a very non-serious debate about Halloween costumes when you spot a familiar face emerging from the nearby hall that leads to the bathrooms. It's Joshua, your weed dealer, and you unintentionally make eye contact with him. His face lights up with recognition, and he waves at you, heading in your direction. Jeonghan looks over his shoulder, doing a poor job of hiding his grimace when he realizes who it is.
"Hey hey!" Joshua says cheerfully as he approaches your table. "What's up you guys?"
"Hi Joshua!" you tell him cheerfully. "We're here to see the show," you explain, nudging your head toward the still-empty stage. You want to ask him what exactly he's doing here, considering that this doesn't seem to be his scene in the slightest, but you figure that might be a bit rude.
"Oh, cool!" he nods eagerly. "Hey, by the way," he says, leaning in to the both of you. "I got some new school supplies coming my way soon, if you catch my drift." He winks at Jeonghan, nudging him playfully with his elbow. "I'll make sure to save the good stuff for you."
Jeonghan stands there frozen with awkwardness at Joshua's directness. "Um," he finally manages to reply. "Yeah, uh, that sounds cool. Thanks."
"Awesome!" Joshua smiles at him sweetly. Turning back to you, he gives you a casual salute.
"Well, I gotta bounce," he excuses himself. "Catch you guys on the flip side."
Once he's out of earshot, you turn to Jeonghan, giving him a knowing look.
"Told you," you tease. "He's like that with everyone."
"Okay, okay, fine," he huffs, raising his hands defeatedly, but a smile spreads across his face. "I believe you now."
Several minutes later, the band finally comes out on stage, eliciting drunken cheering and whooping from the crowd of bar-goers.
"What the fuck is up!!!" the lead singer screams into the microphone. "We're Fuckwagon, and here's some fucking music!"
A screeching guitar riff begins, joined momentarily by crashing drums and a bassline that somehow already seems out of sync with the song. The lead singer appears to be playing the shrill guitar, and the bass player also has a mic; they start singing in tandem â sort of. You're not sure if the sounds coming from either of them can even be considered singing, but they proceed regardless, wailing into the mics as the drummer is already flailing crazily at the drum set. You nod your head to the beat as best you can; turning to Jeonghan, you see he also wears a stunned expression, staring blankly at the raucous scene on the stage.
"Is this the same song or a new one?" you ask him a few minutes later, leaning in to speak into his ear.
"Fuck if I know," he shrugs. He tosses back the rest of his drink, picking up your empty glass as well. "Want another one?"
"Yeah, definitely."
He returns a few minutes later with two fresh Jack and Cokes in hand. The lead singer has somehow already taken his shirt off, revealing a plethora of tattoos that you personally would consider hideous. You and Jeonghan down the drinks fast â unintentionally, but anything to make the music more tolerable. There seems to be no distinction from one song to the next, the night going by in a non-stop cacophony of hard, grungy rock sounds. You don't pay too much attention to the music though, instead talking and laughing with Jeonghan the whole time.
"That's not even the weirdest part," Jeonghan continues his story, resting his elbow on your shoulder as he leans in close to your face. "The next week, I get home and the apartment is filled with boxes of potatoes. Turns out, Jun had built a potato cannon, and he thought he had placed an order for a hundred potatoes â but he had accidentally ordered a hundred ten-pound bags."
"Oh my god," you laugh in disbelief. "How did he not notice, wasn't it expensive??"
"I have genuinely no idea," Jeonghan shakes his head, also laughing. "He just does things like that sometimes."
"I think he has to be the strangest guy I've ever met," you respond. "I can't believe you live with him."
"Hey, he's a great roommate. He's clean, quiet, and half the time he's not even there â off doing god knows what."
"And that was our last song!!!" the lead singer screams into the mic over the drummer continuing his solo despite the song having ended. "Goodnight motherfuckaaaas!!!"
The band exits the stage, the next band already setting up their instruments.
"Thank god," you say to Jeonghan, who is all but fully leaning on you at this point. You pick his drink up off the table, finishing it off before he can drink any more; he doesn't seem to notice.
"You think the next band will be any better?" he asks you, his face mere inches from yours, heavy eyelids blinking slowly in his drunken state.
"There's no way they can possibly be worse than that."
You were wrong. Despite it being harsh and grating, the first band at least had upbeat rock music; the new band consists of six people, one of whom plays the trumpet, and all of whom barely fit on the stage â and their music is dull, drawn-out, and extremely repetitive. You're not sure if lead singer is drunk or if he just sounds like he is, but either way, it's borderline insufferable.
You turn to Jeonghan, about to suggest you call it a night, but he clearly has the exact same thought.
"Should we⊠leave?"
"Yeeaaaah," you nod eagerly in agreement. "We should leave."
It's even colder now as you step out of the bar, but despite the chilly autumn wind the fresh, smoke-free air feels delightful.
"So," Jeonghan asks as you stroll down the sidewalk together. He drove you to the bar, but neither one of you seem to recall that detail â but you're both too drunk to drive, anyway. "What did you think of⊠that?"
"I think it sucked shit," you reply honestly. Jeonghan bursts out laughing, making you start giggling too.
"Yeah, that was pretty terrible," he agrees. "Sorry I dragged you to this."
"Don't be!" you insist. "I still had a good time."
"Good," Jeonghan replies, a smile lighting up his face. "I did too."
Though your apartment is further than his, he walks you home first. The alcohol in your system has kept you warm all night, but the cold nighttime breeze is starting to get to you. You shiver, tugging the sleeves of your sweater down over your hands and tucking them into you as you cross your arms to try and stay warm.
"Here," Jeonghan tells you as soon as he notices, immediately taking his jacket off.
"No, I'll be fineâ" you start, but he's already wrapping it around your shoulders. The jacket is warm, both from its thick leather and Jeonghan's body heat. You accept it graciously, slipping your arms into the baggy sleeves and zipping it all the way up.
"Thanks," you tell him sincerely. "You're the best."
In the dim orange-y glow of the incandescent streetlamps it's hard to tell, but Jeonghan blushes, his face turning even pinker than the alcohol made him.
You arrive outside your apartment a few minutes later.
"Well, goodnight," Jeonghan smiles at you. To his surprise, you suddenly throw your arms around him, leaning your head against his shoulder as you hug him. He tenses up slightly as his inebriated brain tries to process what's happening, but slowly he wraps his arms around you too, sinking into your embrace. It only lasts a few seconds, but the moment simultaneously feels hours long and also over way too fast.
"Goodnight," you reply as you let go, waving as you turn toward the sidewalk to head home. "Get home safe, okay?"
"I will," he nods softly. He watches until you've made it inside, then turns to head back to his own apartment, wondering if you knew that you just completely flipped his world upside down.
[SIX]
You wake up the next day uncomfortably hot.
Prying your eyes open, you see that you're in your living room. Apparently, you were too tired to make it all the way to your bedroom, so you just crashed on the couch, still wearing your shoes and Jeonghan's jacket. Your arm feels like lead as you try to lift it, peering at your watch: 12:16pm.
"Holy shit," you grumble as you hoist yourself up into a sitting position, your head pounding with a killer hangover. A few seconds later, Mina walks into the room.
"Jesus Christ, you're a mess," she tells you bluntly. "What the hell did you do last night?"
"Um, went to a shitty bar and saw a shitty band," you answer, rubbing your aching eyes. "Scratch that â two shitty bands."
"With your boyfriend, I assume?" she asks, glancing at the oversized leather jacket with its many pins and buttons.
"He's not my boyfriend," you mumble through a yawn, shimmying out of the jacket and neatly placing on the armrest next to you.
"Well, you knew who I was talking about without me even saying his name, sooooâŠ"
"Shut uppp," you groan, flopping your tired head onto the back of the couch. With a pleased grin, she heads into the kitchen. You close your eyes, nodding off again, but soon you start to smell fresh coffee, and hear the sound of a sizzling skillet. A few minutes later, Mina returns, carrying a large mug of steaming coffee and a plate of fried eggs and pancakes.
"Here, eat," she says firmly, setting the plate and mug in front of you on the coffee table.
"Thanks, Mina," you smile at her.
After devouring your breakfast, you hop in the shower, standing there under the hot stream of water for far too long â but, you feel a million times better afterward. You toss on some sweats and decide to work on some homework from your bed. After a surprisingly productive afternoon, make your way back to the kitchen to find some dinner. On your way there, you pass by the couch, spotting Jeonghan's jacket still laying there. You feel bad that you didn't remember to give it back last night â after all, this is quite literally his only jacket. You're figure you should just take it over to him after you eat dinner. But, you're pretty sure he mentioned that he was working tonight; and since it's getting late and campus is a closer walk for you anyway, you figure you'll just try and drop it off at the station.
Your walk to campus is eerily empty. You've never seen this few people around, but it is Saturday night, after all. Most people are probably either at home or partying off-campus by this point. You approach the Comms building, suddenly worried that the door might be locked at this hour; but its swings right open when you pull it, and you let yourself inside. You've only had a couple classes in this building before, so you're not familiar with its layout, and you realize you have no idea where the radio station is actually located. You're about to start wandering down the halls in a random direction when you spot a directory by the staircase. The station appears to be on the top floor, so you head up the stairs.
There's no signage for the station, but you figure the bright red door with all the stickers all over it is probably the one you need. You knock at the door quietly, just now realizing that maybe this was a bad idea and that you shouldn't be here. You consider turning around and leaving before you can bother anybody, but then the door swings open. A tough-looking man with long hair and a beard pokes his head out.
"Hi, so sorry to bother you," you tell him apologetically. "But I was wondering if Jeonghan was working tonight? I just wanted to drop off his jacket."
"Oh!" the man replies with a smile, looking suddenly much less intimidating. "Yeah, he's here, come on in!"
You're not sure what exactly you thought a college radio station that plays punk music would look like, but this place seems to fit the bill. You don't see Jeonghan, but then the man points his thumb back to the small window in the far wall.
"He's in the booth right now, but I'll go grab him once we cut to commercial," he tells you. "I'm A.J., by the way," he adds, extending his hand to you.
"Y/n," you introduce yourself.
"Oh, so you're y/n!" A.J. responds amicably. "I've heard all about you.""
"Oh," you reply, feeling your face turn hot suddenly. "Really?"
"Yeah, Jeonghan talks about you all the time. All good things, though, I promise," he smiles. "Hey, I gotta go fax something real quick â just hang out in here for a sec, I'll be right back."
He exits the room, and you walk over to the window, peering into the booth. There's a lot of equipment in the way, but you spot the back of Jeonghan's head, clad with headphones and bobbing his head to whatever must be playing on the radio right now. You can't see his face, but you get the sense that he really is enjoying the job.
A.J. returns in a couple minutes. He waits outside the booth door, glancing at the lit-up ON AIR sign overhead.
"I'll go grab him as soon we're not on air," he tells you. Sure enough, it shuts off a few seconds later, and he slips into the booth. Watching through the window, you see Jeonghan turn around to greet his boss; A.J. points to you through the window, and Jeonghan turns, his face lighting up when he sees it's you.
"Hey!" he says cheerfully as he comes out to greet you. "What are you doing here?"
"Just returning your jacket I accidentally stole from you," you say, extending the garment to him.
"Oh yeah," he chuckles, taking the jacket from you. "I didn't even realize until I was almost home, I was wondering why I was so cold."
"Sorry," you smile apologetically.
"Don't even worry about it," he smiles back at you. "Thanks for bringing it to me, you didn't have to do that."
"Yes I did. I know for a fact that you don't own any other jackets," you tease.
"Okay, you got me there," he grins.
"How's the job going?" you ask.
"It's great!" he answers with more enthusiasm than you're used to from him. "I'm can officially run the show and be on air by myself now, no more supervision required."
"That's so cool," you beam at him. "You seem like you're really liking it so far."
"Yeah," he nods. "I definitely am."
"Well, I should let you get back to work now," you tell him. "Hope you have a good rest of your shift."
"Thanks, y/n," Jeonghan smiles warmly. "See ya later."
The end credits to Law & Order: Special Victims Unit begin to play as you lay on the couch, eating potato chips straight from the bag. It's not particularly the most exciting Saturday night you could be having, but you're enjoying the relaxing night in. You're not really in the mood to keep watching TV, so you grab the remote and shut it off. Mina isn't home yet, so you figure you'd take this opportunity to play your music out loud without wearing headphones. You get up and shuffle over to the boombox perched on the bookshelf, turning it on; it's tuned to the local pop station â clearly Mina used it last. You enjoy this station too, but your mind flashed back to Jeonghan in the booth. Maybe I'll hear him on the air, you think to yourself excitedly. You change the tuner to 90.5 and are greeted by the heavy tune of an unfamiliar but grungy-sounding song.
Plopping back on the couch you reach for your bag of chips again â but over the crinkling of the bag as you stick your hand in it, a very familiar voice comes through on the radio.
"You're listening to WFVC 90.5, the hottest place for underground punk and badass rock n' roll. The track you just heard was "Beautiful Monster" by Meatglove, one of their earliest and most iconic releases. Up next â we've got some Death Day Party for you, as well as a classic from Wunderguts; but first, some local flavor from Z-41 with their newest track "Hell Highway."
You're a bit taken aback by the confidence and air which he delivered his spiel. You can tell he's still getting used to it, but you swear you've never heard him sound so self-assured. The crashing drums of the next song begin; you're getting a bit sleepy, but you're comfy â so you end up laying on the couch for another hour or so, zoned out as you enjoy the music. You're halfway asleep when Mina returns home, so out of it that you don't even hear her come in; but you do hear Jeonghan's voice over the speakers, making you smile as your eyes start to drift close.
"I assume that's your boyfriend on the radio?"
Your eyes shoot open again at the sudden sound of Mina's voice. Looking up, you see her looming above you as she stands beside the armrest.
"I didn't even hear you come in," you tell her, rubbing your tired eyes.
"Yeah, I can tell," she teases. "You wouldn't be swooning and gushing over him like that if you knew I was here."
"I was not," you roll your eyes. "I was like half-asleep."
"Mhmm. Well, I'm going right to bed â goodnight!"
And with that, you're alone with the radio again.
While the commercials play, an idea pops into your head. You remember Jeonghan making an off-hand comment about how the station does take requests â it's just that hardly anyone ever calls them in. You consider for a minute, and then decide, fuck it.
You get up again, quietly heading over to the landline. You're don't actually know the number, so you flip through the phone book, perusing the thin yellow pages for the station. Eventually, you spot it: Foxville College Communications Department, WFVC 90.5 â 555-1004.
You dial the number, the line ringing as you wait for it to connect. You realize you're not even sure what exactly it is you planned to request, considering that the station only plays underground stuff. Anything you would normally request on the radio is off the table.
Before you can think of something, the line picks up.
"WFVC 90.5, we have a caller live on the air," you hear Jeonghan answer the call. "Hi there, whatcha calling for?"
Your stomach drops a bit â you weren't expecting him to actually pick up live on the air. You're not a shy person, but the thought that a bunch of random strangers can hear you right now does make you at least a little bit nervous.
"Hi!" you say cheerfully, careful not to be to so loud as to wake Mina. "Um, I was hoping I could call in a request."
"Of course you can!" he answers. You were wondering if Jeonghan would recognize your voice, but the slight pause and the upward shift in his voice tells you he definitely does. "What are you looking for?"
Thinking on the fly, you say the first thing that pops into your head.
"Well, I don't actually have a specific song in mind," you reply. " Can you play me something upbeat and happy? A song I'd play if I was just chilling with my friend or something."
"I sure can," Jeonghan responds, and you swear you can hear the smile in his voice. "What's your name?" he remembers to ask at the last second â of course, he already knows, but he makes sure he sticks to the script.
"Y/n," you tell him.
"Well, y/n, thanks for calling in â we appreciate ya. Got a special one just for you coming up right now: this one's called 'Heart Attack', by good friends of the station, Fever Baby â right here on WFVC 90.5!"
The call ends, the flat tone humming in your ear. You put the receiver back, heading back into the living room. You're not entirely sure how radio requests work, but you assume there's some sort of slight delay. Sure enough, right as you return the end of your call plays, followed by a light and rhythmic guitar strumming â the song he chose for you. You sit down as you listen, the melody picking up with a bright atmosphere. The song is exactly the vibe you were looking for, and you like it a lot. Turns out the band has a female lead too, something you always love, especially in this genre of music. You must've said that once a long time ago, in some off-hand comment, but Jeonghan remembered. That's the thing about Jeonghan, though â he always does.
[SEVEN]
The semester passes by, days getting shorter and temperatures getting lower as the final weeks of fall come to a close. School has kept you plenty busy, with midterms and papers taking up the majority of your time. You haven't been able to have as much of a social life as you would like, which isn't particularly unusual for this time of year; but Jeonghan especially has been busy â late nights at the station have caused his sleep schedule to shift significantly, rendering your schedules largely incompatible. You miss him, and you really hope you can find a way to hang out with him soon.
You're sitting in your apartment studying one night when the phone rings. The phone doesn't have caller ID, but you expect it's one of Mina's friends calling, as she likes to chat on the phone more often than you do. She's not home right now, so you could easily just let it go to voicemail, but something in you feels the urge to answer.
"Hello?" you answer as you pick up, grabbing the nearby stack of sticky notes and a pen in case you need to take a message.
"Hey y/n," you hear Jeonghan say softly through the line.
"Hannie!" you say, surprised but excited to be hearing his voice. "How's it going? I feel like I haven't seen you in ages!"
"I know, I've been so busy," he concurs. "I'm tired as hell, but I'm okay. How are you?"
"Same, I'm exhausted but I'm getting by. How's the DJ life treating you?"
"It's good!" he answers eagerly. "I mean, that's why I'm so tired. But in a way it also kinda gives me an energy boost. I know that probably sounds crazyâŠ"
"Not at all," you smile. "That means you really like it! I'm so glad it ended up being a great fit for you."
"Me too," he agrees. "I've been so happy lately. Except for the fact that we haven't hung out like, at all. That part sucks."
"We gotta find some time to hang," you say assertively.
"Actually, that's why I'm calling," he replies. "The Comms Department is having this social thing on Friday night. I wasn't really planning to go, but guests are allowed if you'd wanna come with me. There's gonna be free food."
"Hell yeah, I'm always down for free food," you grin â though, you're much more excited about getting to see Jeonghan finally.
"Cool! It starts at 7, I'll drop by your place around then and we can walk to campus together."
"Sounds good," you say excitedly. "Is this like, a formal event?"
"Um, I don't think so? But like, maybe a little?"
"I'll dress up at least a little, then," you tell him. "I'd rather be overdressed than underdressed."
"Good idea, I'll do the same. Well, I gotta head to work in a few minutes, so I gotta go."
"Have a good shift!" you tell him. "See ya on Friday."
"See ya then, y/n."
Friday afternoon you start rummaging through your closet, looking for something to wear to the social later. You have a few hours until you need to be ready, but you figured you'd give yourself a little extra time to make yourself look at least a little bit nice. It's been a while since you've had an excuse to dress up anyway, so what the hell, why not.
Nothing is particularly catching your eye as you flip through the hangers, until you get to the end and spot a brand new skirt you had completely forgotten about. You pull it out to look at it; it's a black pinstripe pleated mini skirt, brandishing a built-in belt, and it still has the tags on. A bit on the casual side, but you figure if you pair it with a nice sweater and tights that don't have any holes in them the outfit will look just the right amount of sophisticated for the occasion.
Digging through your dresser drawer, you take a look at your sweaters. Most are a bit too tattered, and about half of them are just sweatshirts featuring a band logo, but you do find a deep maroon sweater that you rarely wear. You lay it on your bed above the skirt and grab a pair of tights to lay out as well; all put together, it actually looks pretty nice.
You throw your outfit on and spend a little bit longer than usual putting makeup on, adding some shimmery eyeshadow and some tinted lip gloss to your usual routine of eyeliner and mascara. When you're done styling your hair, you take a look at yourself in the mirror. It's not that you usually look bad, but you definitely tend to dress more on the casual side, so you're pleasantly surprised by how put-together you look right now. Turns out, a little extra effort can go a long way.
You're reading your book a couple hours later when you hear a light knocking at your door. Hopping up off the couch you flutter over to answer it, opening the door to reveal Jeonghan looking the fanciest you've ever seen him. He's still in his leather jacket, of course â but underneath he wears a maroon button-down shirt and crisp black dress pants, and you've never seen his long hair so neat and styled.
"Holy shit, since when do you own dress pants?" you ask with a playful smirk.
"Hey, shut up," he pouts. "I know they look stupid."
"They do not!" you insist. "You look really nice, Jeonghan. I've just never seen you so dressed up. And we even matched on accident!" you chuckle.
"Looks like we did," he smiles. "You look really nice as well," he says, staring at your outfit for a moment but quickly averting his gaze. You typically wear clothes that are at least a little bit baggy, but this sweater fits you snugly, its thin knit fabric accentuating your every curve very flatteringly. Jeonghan tries not to think about it.
"Thanks! Here, let me put my shoes on and then we can bounce."
He steps inside as you grab your Doc Martens, leaning down to slip your feet into them and tighten the laces. Your back is to him as you bend over, and while your skirt isn't super short it does ride up a bit in the process, your thighs on full display through the sheer black tights. He ogles you as you tie the boots up, feeling his face grow hot. He knows you don't notice, but he forces himself to turn away before you do, prying his eyes off of you, but it's too late.
"Um, I'm gonna go pee real quick," he tells you, scurrying off to your bathroom.
"Okie dokie," you reply.
Jeonghan doesn't actually have to pee, but he locks himself in the bathroom anyway. He stares at himself in the mirror, still thrown off by how different he looks all cleaned up.
"Get it together man," he grumbles to himself.
A couple minutes later he returns.
"Ready?" you ask, grabbing your coat.
"Yep!" he says with a smile.
The walk to campus is cold, but there's no wind, so it's surprisingly pleasant. On your way there it begins to snow, huge flakes falling gently through the air and starting to accumulate on the ground. You arrive to the Comms Building, brushing the snow off your jacket before you step through its doors to the warm interior.
"You've got some in your hair, too," Jeonghan points out. You ruffle your hair lightly, shaking the snow off.
"So do you," you tell him, reaching up and brushing your fingers across his hair, brushing the stark white snow out of his long, dark locks. Jeonghan freezes up slightly, grateful that his cheeks are already pink from the cold so you can't see him blushing like an idiot.
"Thanks," he says softly.
You make your way to the end of the hall, where two doors propped open lead you into the event space. Immediately you see that despite your efforts, you are both still noticeably underdressed.
"Welp," he mumbles to you quietly. "Guess I didn't get the memo that this was actually fancy."
"It's okay," you reply reassuringly. "We still look nice." And it's true, but amongst all the suits and heels you still feel a bit out of place.
You make your way over to the food table together, grabbing plates and piling them high with the assortment of hors d'oeuvres on display. It earns you a few judgmental glares from a group of older adults standing nearby, but you're both broke college kids, so you don't really give a fuck.
"Let's go over there," Jeonghan says after you each grab a glass of wine, nudging his head toward the back of the room. You meander through the groups of professors and whomever else standing around and chatting, claiming the two chairs in the corner.
"So, what exactly is this event supposed to be again?" you ask him as you pop a fancy cracker with cheese on it into your mouth.
"Um, I don't actually know," he admits as he sips at wine, glancing around the room. "I thought it was for students and professors to meet each other, but I don't think any of these people are actually studentsâŠ"
You look around too, and he seems to be right. Everyone is significantly older and distinguished-looking â very clearly not undergraduates.
"Oops," you say, trying not to smile too big. "Does that mean we just walked in here and stole their food?"
A grin starts to spread across his face. "Um, yeah. Looks like it."
He starts to giggle out loud, prompting you to subtly whack him in the leg.
"Shhh, people are gonna notice!" you whisper, but you feel the urge to start laughing too. A voice rings out over the speaker system as somebody starts talking into a microphone. The attendees all turn and face the small stage, where a woman in a sequined navy dress starts to speak.
"Should we go?" he asks quietly.
"Yeah, definitely," you reply, tossing back the rest of your wine. "But let's grab some more food on the way out."
Jeonghan grins. "I like the way you think."
After piling the small plastic plates with as much food as you possibly can and grabbing another glass of wine each, you sneak out the back door of the room, quickly making your way towards the building's exit.
"Holy shit," Jeonghan laughs as you burst through the door returning you to the quad. "That was awesome."
"I love to steal free food," you giggle. The falling snow has picked up, blustering around calmly but shrouding everything in a sea of white. "C'mon," you say to him, zipping off toward your usual spot under the small oak tree. "Let's go over here."
You stand together beneath the branches, accepting their humble offering of any sort of cover as you scarf down the rest of the food on your plates.
"I guess we also technically stole these wine glasses," Jeonghan comments as he stares at the remaining red liquid in the bowl. "I didn't even realize they were real."
"Me neither," you say, finishing your drink. "Whoops."
Hors d'oeuvres and wine now gone, you toss the plates in a nearby trashcan, leaving the glasses sitting on the steps to the Comms Building and zooming off before somebody catches you. When you get off campus you slow your pace, strolling casually down the block through the deluge of snow.
"Maybe I should've driven," Jeonghan chuckles. "But also who wants to drive in this weather."
"True," you smile. "But I don't mind the snow. It's nice."
"Me neither."
You chat the whole walk home, taking and laughing about anything and everything and nothing at all. By the time you make it to your building, your cheeks hurt â not only from the cold but from smiling nonstop the whole night.
"Tonight was really fun â even if it wasn't what we expected," you say, turning to face Jeonghan.
"Same here," he smiles softly. "I'm glad I finally got to see you."
"Me too," you beam back. You're thinking about inviting him up, maybe to smoke a J or something, when suddenly his lips are on yours.
Your whole body freezes. His lips are soft, the kiss is sweet, but you were not prepared for it. Quickly he pulls his face back, his eyes widening with fear like a deer in the headlights.
"Sorry," he stammers, then takes off.
"Wait!" you call out after him. "Jeonghan!" But he's gone in the blink of an eye, running off down the street into the snowy night.
[EIGHT]
Almost an entire week passes, and you don't see or hear from Jeonghan once.
You tried calling him, but you just kept getting Jun, who seemed to be confused but didn't ask any questions. You tried to meet him after several of his classes, but he either wasn't there or managed to completely evade you. You even tried e-mailing him, but as you expected, no response.
So you gave up for the time being. You knew he wasn't going to avoid you forever, that eventually he would come back. But damn, you hated waiting for it.
It's now Thursday night. Six nights have gone by, and still radio silence from Jeonghan. You're not even upset with him, you just want to talk to him. There's too many questions swimming around in your brain right now â you can hardly think about anything else.
Why did you kiss me?
Why did you run away?
Why have you been so scared to talk to me?
Do you love me?
The living room boom box softly plays the local classic rock channel as you lay at the couch, staring at the ceiling and thinking too much. For reasons you can't explain, you suddenly get up and go change the tuner to 90.5. You lay back down, unsure what exactly the point of that was, but also you don't really care. You're not even sure if Jeonghan is working tonight, and even if he is it's too early for him to be on â but the radio station is enough to remind you of him. You feel tears begin to well in your eyes, blinking them away quickly.
The DJ eventually comes back on the air; as expected, it's not Jeonghan, but that doesn't make you any less sad about the whole situation. The next song that comes on sounds vaguely familiar, and awful; it occurs to you about two minutes into the song that this sounds like that terrible band you saw at that bar â Fuckwagon or whatever. The one you saw with Jeonghan.
Tears begin to stream down your cheeks. Unable to shut them down, you just let them flow, softly sobbing into the couch.
This is so fucking stupid, you tell yourself. I'm crying to a Fuckwagon song right now. You let out a laugh through your tears, in disbelief of how utterly stupid this scenario is. After crying for a few more minutes, you eventually calm back down. Your mind is a bit clearer now, and you come to the realization that there's nothing stopping you from marching over there right this instant and putting an end to this nonsense.
Fifteen minutes later, you're standing outside Jeonghan's apartment. All that's left is to knock, but now that you're here that part feels daunting. You take a deep breath, slowly raising your hand to the door, then you knock. It comes out a bit more aggressive than you meant it, but you hope that means he'll hear you right away. You hear footsteps trodding toward the door, and then it opens.
"Oh, hi y/n," Jun greets you. He looks frazzled, like you just woke him from a thousand-year slumber.
"Hey, Jun. Sorry, I didn't mean to wake you," you tell him apologetically.
"Oh, I wasn't asleep," he replies nonchalantly. You're about to ask him what the hell he was doing then, but you decide some questions don't need to be answered. Besides, that's not why you're here.
"Is Jeonghan here?" you cut to the chase. "I was hoping to talk to him."
"Sorry, no," he shakes his head. "You just missed him â he left for work about ten minutes ago."
"Dammit," you mutter.
"Has he still not talked to you since he kissed you?"
You look up at Jun, a perplexed expression coloring your face. "You know about that?"
"Yes," he replies matter-of-factly. "He came home right after that and was freaking out about it. He wasn't exactly very coherent, but through his ramblings I got the general picture."
"Did he say why he was freaking out?" you try.
"He was scared that it was a mistake, that he fucked it all up."
"Fucked what all up?" you ask, furrowing your brow. "Our friendship?"
Jun lets out a gentle sigh. "So you didn't know, then," he says softly. "Jeonghan is in love with you, y/n. Has been since the day he met you."
You make it to campus in record time, speed-walking as fast as you can, zooming across the quad directly toward the Comms Building. You're out of breath as you enter, groaning as you spot the three flights of stairs you now have to climb. But you move quickly anyway, your body seemingly unable to slow down for anything.
This time you don't even bother knocking on the red door. You fling it open, expected to have to come up with some sort of explanation on the fly with his boss, but you are greeted by an empty office. The door slowly closes behind you as you walk over to the booth window. Peering in, sure enough you can see the top of his head as he sits at the broadcast mixer. The ON AIR sign above you is lit; you wait for the red light to shut off, then you knock on the booth door. Jeonghan turns around slowly, looking confused, but then he sees you standing outside the window. His eyes widen, and he leaps out out of his chair, bolting to the door and swinging it open.
"What are you doing here??" he asks, looking genuinely surprised.
"I don't want to get you in trouble, but we have to talk."
"Nobody else is here tonight," he replies. "Here, come inside."
He shuts the door behind you as you enter, but as soon as he does you grab him by the arm and spin him around to face you.
"What theâ"
"Why did you run away?"
"Iâ" He pauses for a moment. "That's⊠not what I thought you were going to ask," he admits.
"What? Why?"
"Well, I just thought you were going to ask me why I kissed you first."
"Okay," you reply. "Then why did you kiss me?"
Jeonghan sighs, dropping his head slightly; but a moment later he lifts it again, looking you directly in the eyes.
"I kissed you because I love you, y/n. I ran away because I was scared you didn't love me back, and I wasn't prepared to face that reality."
His gaze is locked onto yours so intensely that you feel like you might burst into flames. He looks like he's experiencing every emotion at once, anxiously waiting for you to say something, anything. But you don't know what to say, so you do what only feels right â you throw your arms around him, pulling him into your embrace.
He gasps softly as you squeeze him tight, burying your face into his chest; you can feel the accelerating pace of his heart, thumping against your cheek. He instinctively wraps his arms around you, leaning his head on top of yours.
"I love you too," you say softly. "I didn't realize it for a while â but it's so obvious to me now."
He kisses the top of your head, rubbing your back as you nuzzle your face deeper into his sweater.
"That's the best news I've ever heard."
You could stay here in his embrace indefinitely, but eventually you lift your head, looking deeply into his eyes.
"Kiss me â but for real this time."
Slowly, Jeonghan grabs your face with both hands, eyeing you hungrily before pulling you into a kiss. This time it's slow, sweet; you slip your hands around his waist, clinging to him as you savor it. Your heart pounds in your chest as your lips tug at each other, refusing to let go, pressing your body into his and pushing him up against the door. A soft, involuntarily moan emanates from his throat, and you feel the stiff, growing bulge in his pants against your stomach.
Eventually your lips part, lingering near each other as he presses his forehead into yours.
"Holy shit," he mutters. "I can't believe this is really happening."
He drops his hands from their grasp on your head, unzipping your coat and taking it off of you; tossing it on a nearby desk, he hurriedly slips his hands around your waist, kneading at the soft flesh and holding your body tightly against him. He feels slightly embarrassed by how quickly he got a full-fledged boner, but he's too aroused to care â besides, judging by the burning desire in your eyes, you're feeling the exact same thing right now.
"You're perfect," he tells you, cracking a smile and blushing as the words leave his lips. You grin back, giving him another soft kiss before taking hold of his hands.
"C'mere," you say to him, dragging him over to the sound mixer.
"What are youâoh." You cut him off by giving him a slight push, sitting him down into the thick, sturdy chair. You straddle his lap, pressing your core against his bulge, rubbing yourself against it through both of your jeans.
"Fuck," Jeonghan gasps as your weight presses against his cock; you lean your head down to kiss him again, locking lips as you start to make out, mouths crashing and tongues eagerly dancing against each other. Eventually you begin to sway your hips, unable to contain your excitement. You gasp as your mouths part, tossing your head back as you grind against him harder; his arms around you squeeze tighter, pulling you in as close as physically possible. His face presses against your tits as he rubs his hands over your ass, guiding you as you rock back and forth on top of him.
"Oh my godâŠ" he sighs. He tosses his head back, and you swoop in, kissing the delicate flesh of his neck, making him let out the most pathetic-sounding groan. You moan as you grind your heat against him, getting the both of you off at once.
"F-fuck, that's so hot," his voice wavers.
"If I keep doing this it's gonna make me cum," you tell him, starting to sound whiny and frantic.
"Oh my god, please do."
You increase your pace, pressing your aching clit against his clothed cock. It feels incredible â you simply can't help the soft little cries escaping your lips.
"Can IâŠ" Jeonghan asks, tugging at the button of your jeans.
"Please," you say breathily as you eagerly nod your head. He unfastens the button, tugging down your zipper and opening your pants enough for him to slip his fingers beneath your underwear. You let out a whimper as his fingertips dip into your folds, his lips parting lustfully as he discovers the absolute pool of wetness in your panties right now.
"Fuck," you whine, rubbing your clit against his fingers with fervor. A burning fire builds in your gut, your whole body tensing in anticipation of your release. It washes over you in bursting waves, your body trembling atop Jeonghan as you ride out your orgasm. As your movement slows, you catch your breath, lifting your head to kiss him on the lips. As you open your eyes you get a glimpse at him, you find him looking utterly desperate, and ready to bust at any given moment. You let out a giggle, still in a daze from your high; but you slip off the chair, kneeling down before him between his legs.
"Oh my god, you're gonna kill me," he half-laughs, half-whines. He raises his drenched fingers to his mouth, lapping your juices up feverously, eyes rolling back as he savors the taste of you. You slowly unbuckle the studded leather belt around his waist, unbuttoning his jeans painfully slowly; he wriggles in his seat, silently pleading for you to take his cock out, for you to put your mouth over itâŠ
Finally, you do â reaching into his boxers, you tug them down, wrapping your hand around his hard, thick cock and pulling it out.
"Holy shit," you blurt out, glancing up at him and giving him a giddy smile. "You've been packing this the whole time?!"
He bursts out laughing, cradling your cheek in his hand, slowly guiding your lips to his cock. You lightly circle the tip with your tongue, teasing him; he lets out a sigh, licking his lips as he watches you taste his cock. Slowly you take the head between your lips, suckling it lightly before you start to slide your mouth down his length. You're not even halfway down when it reaches the back of your mouth; you push down further, taking him in your throat, gagging audibly on his size.
"Ohhh, wow," he mumbles as his eyelids flutter back. "That's so goodâŠ"
His hips gently push upward as you bob your head up and down, feeding you more of his length as you slide it in and out of your mouth. Your noises escalate, pathetic whining growing louder as you start to increase your pace. He can't help himself â he starts to fuck his cock into your mouth, sliding deep into your throat. Tears well in your eyes, but you continue to stare up at him; the sight is enough to send him over the edge.
"Baby, 'm gonna cum," he groans. A few thrusts later, you feel ropes of hot cum shooting down your throat, his cock pulsing in your mouth as he releases. Soft whimpers escape his trembling lips as he cums hard in your mouth, relishing every moment of the delicious sensation. He strokes your head gently as he finishes; you swallow all his cum, slowly dragging your lips off his spent cock.
"Fuck," he sighs, melting into the chair. Opening his eyes, he looks down at you sweetly, his head still spinning from the orgasm. "Thank you."
"For sucking your dick?" you ask, starting to giggle.
"Yeah," he says with a stupid grin. "That was awesome."
He helps to you your feet, tucking his cock back inside his pants and zipping them up again. He pulls you onto his lap, wrapping his arms around you and kissing you again.
"Sorry I kissed you and ran away like an idiot," he tells you, holding you snugly against him. "That was really stupid and embarrassing."
"You're not an idiot," you reply, playfully thumping him in the chest. "I like you just the way you are."
Jeonghan smiles. In the few years you've known him, you've never seen him radiating with genuine happiness like this â you decide it looks great on him.
[EPILOGUE]
You gasp for air as your head falls back into the pillows, chest heaving in the aftermath of your orgasm. Jeonghan remains parked between your legs, lazily lapping at your soaked pussy â his new favorite place to be.
"Fuck," you sigh, dragging your fingers through his hair. "That was so good."
He lifts his head, his mouth and chin glistening with your juices.
"Good," he replies, grinning at you proudly.
"Kiss me," you plead softly; he crawls up the bed to greet your lips with his, planting a deep kiss onto your mouth. A sudden knocking at your bedroom door makes the both of you jump.
"Hey lovebirds," Mina calls out through the door. "Your take-out just got here. I already paid for it, so you owe me $20."
"It was only $15!" you shout back.
"Service fee. For me," she responds cheekily, already walking away. You roll your eyes, laughing it off. Jeonghan starts kissing your cheeks, pecking gently as the soft skin.
"Hey, that tickles!" you giggle.
"But you look so pretty when you laugh," he replies, continuing to kiss you.
"You're ridiculous."
"I just love you, that's all."
He lifts his head, smiling at you sweetly.
"I love you too," you reply, beaming back at him. "We should go get our food before it gets coldâ" you say, starting to try and sit up, but Jeonghan holds you pinned against the bed.
"Hey!" you protest, but he's already sliding back down the bed.
"You have a microwave," he says matter-of-factly, taking hold of your thighs as he positions his face right in front of your dripping core again.
"Besides, I'm not done here yetâŠ"
thank you so much for reading! if you enjoyed this fic, don't forget to REBLOG and COMMENT â your feedback is greatly valued âĄ
A first date with Hoshi would mean non-stop fun planned for the whole evening. You knew when your friend told you that she: "had someone who could match your energy," that you were definitely in for a ride. And that expectation was met as soon as you saw Soonyoung bounding towards you, calling your name from the entrance of the aquarium.
Hoshi would have already bought the entry tickets, and the VIP experience with the penguins at noon as well for an added surprise, (not that you minded). Hoshi would plead the entire day that your wallet stays firmly inside your purse, nothing will be paid for by you. "I insist, please. Let me spoil you a bit, okay?" His eyes squish up into sparkling crescent moons as he smiles big at you while handing over your ticket.
And as soon as you both walk through the doors he grabs a map of the building, outlining where your first stops are. He's babbling excitingly with a point of a finger, that you can't help the grin that spreads on your face from his enthusiasm. "First the sharks, then the whales! Of course, we'll go see the penguins - I booked the VIP experience where we'll get to feed them!" Hoshi's excitement is contagious as he starts off towards the first exhibit, with you rushing after him with a giggle.
When you two are a little near the whales, a sudden burst of excited school children flooding the area nearly pull the two of you apart, and that's when Hoshi reaches out. His arm wraps around your waist, tugging you closer to his side with a little, "Whoa, almost lost you for a minute there." His eyes are lighting up as you easily melt into the casual contact against his side. "Stay close, okay?" His fingers pressing into your waist slightly, keeping you close from that point on.
First Date! Hoshi, who when on the way to the "penguin experience" sees one of those plywood cutout photo ops, (the ones with the silly scene painted on the front with holes for your faces to go) practically drags you to it with an excited, "look!." This one is a mermaid and a merman holding hands, and Hoshi insists on a photo together pulling you behind the cutout while making some poor aquarium worker take the photo with a grin.
First Date! Hoshi positions you just right, his hands brushing your waist again briefly before he persuades the worker to take a bunch of photos, and darts back to his spot in the cut out. Endless laughter ensues as he looks over all of the photos, automatically making one his new phone wallpaper, with an amused smirk."Now I can always see your pretty smile." He says simply, slipping his phone away, like that didn't just give you butterflies.
First Date! Hoshi keeps you laughing through the entire penguin experience. From copying their waddle behind a line of them to trying to speak to them in penguin squawks. You're laughing so hard your sides hurt, and when one of the penguins comes up to you nosing you with their beak, you blink in surprise. "Oh, they must like me or something" you say with a grin. "They have good taste," he replies easily but with sparkling eyes that reignite the butterflies in your stomach, his little smirk sending your heart into overdrive.
First Date! Hoshi, who on the way to the gift shop sees that the jellyfish area is practically abandoned, so he decides to pull you in. He laces his fingers in yours and gently pulls you to the bench that faces the expansive glass. He lets out a soft sighing breath as he lets his arm rest behind your back, casually closing the distance between you two. "I'm glad you came today, I hope you'll spend another day with me like this." He says giving you a sidelong glance before looking up at all the pretty jellyfishes in wonderment.
First Date! Hoshi doesn't notice at first when you shift close enough to lean against him, but when you do he holds his breath for a moment before finally relaxing, and letting his arm fully wrap around you. "I'm glad I came too." You say now looking upwards at Soonyoung, your voice pulling his attention to you.
First Date! Hoshi almost freezes again when your lips are millimeters apart from touching his, but he quickly regains composure and closes the small space without hesitation. He presses his lips to yours in a quick, sweet kiss that leaves you wishing for more. "Should we go?" His question was barely heard over the thud of your heartbeat in your ears, but you nod in agreement and his hand easily finds yours as he helps you stand.
First Date! Hoshi still insists on a quick stop to the gift shop before you two rush out, "A memento for one of my greatest days so far." Soonyoung says it with a near lovesick grin as his eyes scan the key-chains. "These ones!" He says proudly holding up two matching penguin ones that have little magnets in their beaks to make them kiss. "Penguins mate for life you know?" He gives you a sidelong glance that lasts just enough to see the blush creep over your cheeks at the implication of his fact.
First Date! Hoshi tried really hard to be patient as you two arrived back at his apartment, but you just looked too kissable, he simply couldn't resist having another taste of you.
That's how you ended up in the meanest mating press you've possibly ever been in, legs draped over his shoulders, Hoshi nipping your bottom lip as his big cock stretches you open deliciously. "You're taking me so well, Baby. Look at you - so wet and she's swallowing me all up, fuck, so good for me." He says while the head of his cock bullies your cervix with every thrust.
First Date! Hoshi swallows up all your mewls and moans, his hand slipping between your bodies to rub rough, sloppy circles over your clit. (You don't know he was spelling out his name until later.) "C'mon pretty, let me see you cum all over my cock, that's rightâŠ" He coos, his voice rough and deep in your ear as your fall apart for him almost on command.
And then he's lifting your legs higher, "One moreâŠgimme one more, Baby." The new position gives him the perfect angle for his cock to brush your G-spot with each pounding thrust he makes and your eyes roll back as he flashes you that same lovesick grin he had back in the gift shop.
First Date! Hoshi chases his release while pulling another orgasm out of you minutes later. He's filling you all the way to the brim with his cock, kissing all down your neck and jaw while murmuring words of praise into your skin.
"Did so good prettyâŠso good, and you're so perfect for me." He murmurs between kisses, slowly dropping your legs, and shifting you both into a sweeter, cuddling position like he didn't just fuck you into his bed like it wasn't your first date. "You get to pick the next date, okay?" He says as you both settle against the pillows, pulling the blankets up around you for the night. He's already thinking of vows as he pulls you into his chest.
A/N: A big huge thank you to @milk-moonbunnies for being the greatest ever and editing and beta reading this! â€ïž
request for vernon high sex drive but like make it nonchalant but it becomes too high he just breaks??
high sex drive!vernon headcanons
high sex drive!vernon is suuuuuper nonchalant. like maybe sometimes too nonchalant. to a point where it seems like his willpower is godlikeâbut in reality, it is not.
high sex drive!vernon doesnât seem to bat an eye when you wear those short, short skirts of yours, when he âaccidentallyâ catches you naked after your shower.
high sex drive!vernon lets you have your way during sex, letting you dictate whether you want to be on top, or be a pillow princess for the night. it seems that he simply does not care.
high sex drive!vernon, in truth, has been holding back his sex drive and his sexual fantasies from you.
high sex drive!vernon who clenches his fists so hard in his jean pockets when he sees you in those skirts. Oh how he just wanted to bend you over the dinner table and fuck you raw in front of all of your friends.
high sex drive!vernon who tries so hard to keep the image of your naked body burnt in his brain for days so when he is fucking his fist for the third time that day, he can pretend heâs cumming deep inside of your gummy walls again and again.
high sex drive!vernon who simply just cannot hold himself back anymore. he sees you get up to shower off his cum off of your back and his cock twitchesâa signal that he is not done, yet.
high sex drive!vernon who has your arms pinned behind your back as he pistons himself in and out of your pussy, grunting and breathing raggedly in your ear. âfuckâyou have no idea how much iâve been holding myself back from fucking you like this. breaking you like this.â
high sex drive!vernon who cums for the second time, now making it a point to do so inside of you so he can watch it ooze out of your swollen lips as he roughly jacks himself off. heâd use his middle finger to scoop up the dripping cum, then pushing it right back into you again.
high sex drive!vernon who instructs you on how to move your hips as your knees give out from beneath you. heâd let out a moan when your sloppy movements rub his cock just right - gripping your hips hard as he tried to recreate that sensation without asking too much from you. heâs pinching your nipples, caressing your cheek, smacking your assâhis hands never leave your body.
high sex drive!vernon who feels his high coming for the third time and gets a little whiny. âyâgonna milk me dry baby? you gonna let me fill you up again?â heâs making eye contact with you, eyebrows scrunched up slightly, lips parted in breathy moans. pulls you down to messily make out with him as he filled you up for the second time.
high sex drive!vernon who is panting now, both of you slumped on top of your wet bed sheetsââfuck, iâm hard again.â
a/n: why is he so goddamn hot???!!! also i did not proofread this đ ty for the request, i had so much fun with this one đ <33
high sex drive with dino⊠he feels like one who would have high sex driveâŠ
high sex drive!dino headcanons
high sex drive!dino who keeps being made fun of by his friends and roommates for having to change his boxers multiple times a day because he precums like crazy!!
high sex drive!dino who has to keep fisting his cock each morning and night, mouth open in a silent âoâ, so he wonât be randomly hard during the day around you (like that one time he was unbelievably hard on an amusement park date)
high sex drive!dino who can go round after round. you challenged him one day, believing that your sex drive was higher than hisâthat your stamina and drive can last longer. you really regretted that decision after he made you cum for the fourth time, the plat plat plat sound of his hips meeting yours had turned into a squelch from dinoâs cum leaking from your little hole. âNot so cocky now, huh? just be quiet and take this cock.â
high sex drive!dino whoâs biggest kink is you sucking him off. the thought of you, on your knees in front of his leaking cock, was what made him so hard during the day. so, naturally, he used your mouth every second of everyday when you two were together. just minutes before his photoshoot, he had you in his dressing room, fist full of your hair while you gagged around his length. he has to film a tiktok? he has convinced you that the only way he can get a perfect take is by you sucking him dry beforehand. his abs would tense, his face tilting upward with a groan as he pumped his cum down your throat for the third time that day.
high sex drive!dino who gets whiny when you are away for too long or youâre stuck in traffic or whatever reasonâbecause why canât he just fuck you when heâs hard? expect a facetime call when youâre out with your friends; your screen lighting up with him lazily stroking his cock, naked on the bed. âI miss you and your pussy. come home.â
a/n: the maknae king!! i had a lot of requests for dino so i am only answering to this one but if u requested, i hope u like <3
Summary: You didnât think tonight would end with your brotherâs best friend telling you how much he wants to fuck you⊠but here you are. Thighs shaking. Heart pounding. Fingers soaked. And itâs not even midnight yet.
Or alternatively where one needy night you end up on an anonymous sexting app only to realise this stranger yet familiar person you're sexting is actually your brother's best friend, kim mingyu.
Pairing: Mingyu x female reader
Setting: Sexting app
Word Count: ~ 3k
Themes: Sexting, slow-burn, depraved, intensely erotic, forbidden (brother's best friend)
Warnings: Explicit sexual content, masturbation, voice kink, dirty talk, mutual pining, brotherâs best friend dynamic, fantasizing, edging
It starts off harmless. A new app, an anonymous chat. You werenât even trying to get off tonight â not really.
You just wanted to feel wanted.
You sign up with the name petal.crush, something vague and romantic to offset your restlessness. Itâs just a sexting app â no profile photos, no bios, no identifying anything. Just usernames and raw, unfiltered chat.
The tagline was catchy: âNo faces. Just fantasies.â
You match within seconds.
Matched with: lowtone.sin
Your screen lights up with the first message before you can even type.
> lowtone.sin:
You clicked first. So youâre either impatient or a little reckless.
Which one is it?
You bite your lip, already smiling at the confidence behind his tone. Typing back feels like slipping into something dangerous.
> petal.crush:
Maybe both.
You planning to do something about it?
> lowtone.sin:
That depends
Are you here for sweet words and flirting?
Or are you here to get ruined?
Your thighs instinctively press together.
> petal.crush:
Ruin me. Slowly.
Thereâs a long pause. You stare at the screen, anticipation crawling up your spine.
Then finallyâ
> lowtone.sin:
Good girl.
Letâs start with something easy.
What would I hear if I called you right now?
Would you sound sweet and shy?
Or would you already be wet and waiting?
You suck in a breath.
Thereâs no point pretending. No coyness left in you tonight. This man â whoever he is â has the kind of tone that makes your stomach clench and your mind submit. You press the mic icon before you can talk yourself out of it.
> petal.crush \[voice note â 0:12]
âIâm not touching myself yet. But Iâm aching for it. My panties are soaked. Just from reading your messagesâ
The response comes fast.
> lowtone.sin:
Youâve got a filthy little mouth for someone who hasnât even been told to touch yet.
Bet you squirm when someone takes control of you, donât you?
That tight, needy body of yours probably begs for it.
You whimper â aloud â and type with trembling fingers.
> petal.crush:
Youâre right.
I love being told exactly what to do.
I want to be teased, edged, used.
> lowtone.sin:
Fuck.
Get your hand between your thighs. Now.
Over your panties. I want your fingers soaked before I even let you move them.
You obey.
The fabric sticks to you immediately. You slide two fingers up and down the drenched cotton and exhale into the dark.
Your phone buzzes again.
> lowtone.sin:
I want to hear how wet you are.
Show me.
You record again, a soft gasp escaping your lips as you press a little harder.
> petal.crush \[voice note â 0:16]
âIâm dripping. The fabricâs so wet itâs clinging to me. I want to slide them off and touch my bare pussy for you.â
> lowtone.sin:
Not yet
Good things come to desperate girls
Tell me â how often do you touch yourself thinking about strangers?
You bite your lip.
> petal.crush:
Not streangers
Someone specific.
> lowtone.sin:
Oh?
Lucky bastard.
Whatâs he like?
Your throat goes dry.
Because heâs you. Youâve fantasized about him. That voice â itâs too perfect, too polished. The way he calls you good girl feels familiar in a way thatâs wrong and addictive.
You shake it off.
> petal.crush:
Tall. Broad.Big hands. Sharp jaw.Smiles like sin.Looks like he could ruin me in one night and leave me wanting more.
Thereâs a pause. Then a photo notification.
Image\[jpg.1]
You tap on it, breath catching in your throat.
Itâs a hand â his hand â wrapped around a thick cock. His grip is firm, the tip flushed red and glistening. You can see the base of his abs, tight and flexed, veins running across his forearm. Itâs cropped â no face, no hints â but god, itâs pretty.
> lowtone.sin:
What do you think?
> petal.crush:
I think I want it down my throat.
> lowtone.sin:
You say things like that and expect me to keep my composure?
> petal.crush:
No.
I want to hear you lose it.
Another voice note comes in. His voice is deeper now â rough, frayed around the edges.
> lowtone.sin \[voice note â 0:28]
âFuck. If you were here right now, Iâd have you on your knees. Iâd hold your jaw, make you look up at me while I slide my cock across your tongue. I bet your eyes would water so pretty when I push deep.â
You moan. Loud. Hand slipping inside your panties at last, slick fingers circling your clit in dizzy little swirls. Your legs tremble.
> petal.crush:
I canât wait. Please.
Tell me what to do. Iâll be so fucking good.
> lowtone.sin:
Take off your panties.
Lie back.
Spread your legs and take a photo for me.
I want to see the mess you made just from my voice
You obey.
You slide them off and grab your phone with one shaky hand, angling the camera down â flushed thighs, glistening lips, your fingers posed teasingly just above where you ache most.
Image\[jpg.2]
You hit send. Instantly.
> lowtone.sin:
Jesus
Look at that cunt.
Bet itâs tight as hell.
You fuck yourself slow or fast?
> petal.crush:
Depends how desperate I am.
> lowtone.sin:
And how desperate are you tonight, baby?
> petal.crush:
Iâm so wet I could come without touching.
But I want you to drag it out. Make it painful.
Thereâs a moment of silence. Then:
> lowtone.sin:
âŠFuck.
This is going to sound crazy.
But your voice?
Your photos.
Youâre too fucking familiar.
Your chest goes still.
That tone. That rasp. That deep little breath before he speaks.
Your heart lurches.
No.
It canât be.
You type, hands shaking:
> petal.crush:
Say something. Just one word.
I need to be sure.
He doesnât text.
He sends a voice note.
> lowtone.sin \[voice note â 0:06]
âY/N.â
Your stomach drops.
It is him.
That voice, you know it. Youâve heard it a hundred times.
Because Mingyu â your brother Seungcheolâs best friend â has been in your house more times than you can count.
And now, heâs here. Holding his cock. Telling you how good your pussy looks.
Your fingers are still between your legs.
And youâre still soaked.
Your heart is pounding.
Youâre sitting in your dark bedroom, soaked fingers trembling between your thighs, staring at your screen like itâs a weapon pointed directly at your chest.
Mingyu.
Your brotherâs best friend.
The voice youâve moaned to in secret.
The man whose towel dropped in front of you two summers ago, whose gaze lingered a beat too long when you walked into the kitchen in your smallest sleep shorts. The man who walked in on you changing and lookedâjust lookedâbut didnât leave for three entire seconds.
Your mouth goes dry.
You wait for him to say something else. Anything.
lowtone.sin:
Say it.
I know you know itâs me.
I want to hear it.
You type slowly, every nerve ending alive.
petal.crush:
Mingyu.
I knew it the second you said my name.
You sound exactly how I imagined when I used to fuck myself to the thought of you.
A pause.
Thenâ
lowtone.sin:
Holy fuck.
You used to what?
petal.crush:
You have any idea how hard it was living in the same house and pretending I wasnât soaking through my panties every time you smiled at me?
lowtone.sin:
Tell me.
Everything.
You pause, pulse pounding.
And then you type like youâre possessed.
petal.crush:
The shorts?
I wore those on purpose. I knew they barely covered my ass.
Every time I bent over to grab something, I made sure you were in the room.
Once, I even âaccidentallyâ spilled water on my chest so I could walk past you in a wet tank top.
And that day you walked in on me changing?
I left the door unlocked.
His reply comes fast.
lowtone.sin:
You fucking minx.
I had to jerk off in your goddamn bathroom after that.
I saw your tits. I saw your thighs.
And the way you looked at meâlike you wanted me to stay?
petal.crush:
I did want you to stay.
I wanted you to push me against the mirror and fuck me stupid.
Right there. With Seungcheol downstairs.
Another voice note.
You brace yourself before you tap it.
lowtone.sin \[voice note â 0:34]
âI swear to God, Y/N. If I had known you wanted it even half as bad as I did, I wouldnât have lasted another day pretending. Every time you moaned in your sleep when I stayed over, I nearly lost my mind. I wanted to sneak into your room and make you finish what you started.â
Your whole body jolts.
petal.crush:
I used to fake moan just loud enough for you to hear when I knew you were sleeping in the next room.
I imagined you sneaking in and putting your hand over my mouth while you fucked me into the mattress.
lowtone.sin:
Jesus fuck.
I used to picture you riding my thigh on the couch while Seungcheol played video games right next to us.
Just your pretty little cunt grinding against me, biting your lip so you wouldnât make a sound.
You moanâout loudâand grab your phone, hand back between your legs.
You donât even bother hiding it this time.
petal.crush \[voice note â 0:23]
âIâm touching myself again. I canât stop. Iâm picturing your hand over my mouth, your cock buried in me, and your voice in my ear telling me Iâm your filthy little secret.â
lowtone.sin:
You are my filthy little secret.
Mine.
No one else gets to hear you like this.
No one else gets to see what Iâm seeing.
Another picture arrives.
Image\[jpg.3]
Heâs naked now, lying back, abs tight, one hand gripping his cock. Heâs glistening with pre-cum, thick and flushed, the kind of cock you want to sink your teeth into.
You whimper.
lowtone.sin:
Let me see you again. All of you.
You slide your shirt off. Fingers trembling, you spread your legs wider and take the shot â body flushed, thighs slick, clit swollen and needy.
Image\[jpg.4]
You donât even hesitate before sending it.
lowtone.sin:
I want to fuck you against every surface in your house.
Against the washing machine while it rumbles.
On your brotherâs bed while heâs in the shower.
On the goddamn kitchen counter while you beg me not to stop.
petal.crush:
I used to imagine you standing behind me while I washed dishes.
Sliding your hand down the front of my shorts and telling me to keep doing chores while you made me come.
lowtone.sin:
I fantasized about making you gag on my cock while Seungcheol watched a movie in the next room.
Youâd cry on it. Iâd fuck your throat until you begged me to come inside.
And Iâd pull out, grip your jaw, and say: âOpen.â
You rub yourself harder now, two fingers circling your clit while you picture everything heâs saying.
petal.crush \[voice note â 0:28]
âIâd do it. Iâd drop to my knees for you so fast. Iâd swallow you down and let you use my mouth. I want it so fucking bad. Pleaseâtalk me through it. Tell me what to do.â
lowtone.sin \[voice note â 0:32]
âSlide two fingers in. Slow. Stretch that tight pussy out while I stroke my cock and imagine itâs your sweet cunt clenching around me. Keep rubbing that clit. But donât come. Not until I tell you.â
You moan brokenly and do as he says.
Fingers curling deep.
Your walls flutter.
You need him so badly it hurts.
lowtone.sin:
How many times have you come to the thought of me?
petal.crush:
I lost count months ago.
lowtone.sin:
What was your favorite fantasy?
You hesitate⊠then type.
petal.crush:
You bend me over the bathroom sink after a swim.
Your trunks are still wet.
Iâm dripping all over the tile.
You grab my throat. You fuck me so hard I canât even look at myself in the mirror.
And when I come, you keep going.
Until Iâm shaking. Ruined. Begging.
He moans â this time in a voice note â and the sound is enough to send you right to the edge.
lowtone.sin \[voice note â 0:24]
âYouâre going to be the death of me. You want to be fucked that dirty, babygirl? You want to cry from how good it feels? Iâll give you every filthy fantasy youâve ever had. Just say the word.â
You hit record with shaking fingers.
petal.crush \[voice note â 0:19]
âPlease. Make me come. Iâm right there. I want to scream your name. Let me be yours. Just say it, Mingyu.â
lowtone.sin:
Come.
Now.
Be my good girl and make a mess for me.
You explode.
White-hot pleasure tears through your core, every nerve singing. You cry out his name, legs twitching, soaked fingers buried in your pussy as you ride the orgasm out.
Youâre a mess.
You can barely breathe.
And thenâ
A voice note. Raspy. Guttural.
lowtone.sin \[voice note â 0:14]
âFucking hell. Iâm comingâfuckâY/N, Iâm coming thinking about that tight pussy and your filthy mouth saying my name.â
You both go quiet for a minute.
Breathless.
Spent.
But buzzing.
Youâre still panting.
Your fingers are sticky with your own slick. Your bodyâs boneless. Your skin feels too hot, your breath too shallow. The little hum of your phone is the only sound in the room, and youâre suddenly very aware of how quiet it is.
And how loud the truth is.
You just came for Mingyu.
And he just came for you.
Your brotherâs best friend. The one youâre not supposed to want.
But God â you want him so bad your bones ache.
The screen glows.
lowtone.sin:
âŠStill alive?
petal.crush:
Barely.
I think you melted my brain.
lowtone.sin:
Good.
That was the goal.
You sounded so fucking pretty when you begged for it.
I replayed your voice note three times before I came.
Your cheeks flush with warmth that runs straight to your core.
petal.crush:
My legs are shaking.
Like⊠actually.
You wrecked me through a screen.
lowtone.sin:
Bet youâre all messy and flushed and glowing right now.
Wish I was there to see it.
Would kiss every inch of you. Clean you up with my tongue.
Your breath stutters.
petal.crush:
Youâre gonna make me start all over again.
lowtone.sin:
Oh?
You that greedy for me already?
petal.crush:
Iâve been greedy for you since I was nineteen.
Since you walked out of the shower that one time shirtless and dripping and smiled like nothing was wrong while I nearly came just from looking at your waistline.
lowtone.sin:
Holy fuck.
I remember that day.
You wouldnât meet my eyes.
You were wearing that little white top⊠no bra.
I had to jerk off in Seungcheolâs bathroom after dinner.
petal.crush:
I knew it.
I remember hearing the water run again and thinking, please let him be thinking about me.
lowtone.sin:
I always was.
Every time I came over, you were the only thing on my mind.
And every time I smiled, every joke I cracked â it was me trying to keep it together.
Pretending I didnât want to drag you into your room and fuck you until you screamed.
petal.crush:
You donât have to pretend anymore.
A beat passes.
Then:
lowtone.sin:
I want to ruin you, Y/N.
For real.
I want to see how that pretty mouth looks moaning my name.
I want to taste how sweet you are when youâre trembling under me.
I want to hold your wrists down and fuck you until you're mine.
Your chest squeezes. Itâs still hot and filthy between you, but now thereâs something else curling underneath it â something heavy and sweet and real.
lowtone.sin:
Remember that party last year?
When you wore that backless dress?
petal.crush:
Yeah. You kept refilling my drink.
lowtone.sin:
Because I couldnât stop staring.
I wanted to drag you into the guest bathroom and eat you out against the door.
You were laughing, dancing like you didnât know what you were doing to me.
petal.crush:
I knew.
I bent over on purpose.
Just so I could feel your eyes on my ass.
I wanted to know if youâd finally break.
lowtone.sin:
I almost did.
I had to go home early and jerk off to the image of your bare back and heels.
Imagining how you'd sound if I fucked you in them.
Youâre flushed again. Dizzy with need. The ache is back, deeper than before.
petal.crush:
Youâre making me wet again.
lowtone.sin:
Good.
Want you wet every time I speak.
Want you to fall asleep with my voice in your head and my name between your legs.
You record another voice note, throat thick with need.
petal.crush \[voice note â 0:18]
âYouâre already in my head, Mingyu. Iâm aching for you. Touching myself again. Canât stop thinking about how youâd feel inside me.â
lowtone.sin:
Fuck.
Youâre gonna kill me.
Youâre perfect. Youâre mine.
Thereâs a moment of pause. His next message is slower, quieter.
lowtone.sin:
Weâre not going back after this, are we?
You stare at that sentence, heart pounding. You type slowly, surely.
petal.crush:
I donât want to.
I donât want to pretend I donât want you anymore.
I want this. You.
Even if itâs wrong.
lowtone.sin:
Then itâs us.
No more secrets.
No more pretending.
petal.crush:
You gonna come see me?
lowtone.sin:
You better leave the door unlocked.
Because Iâm coming over tomorrow night.
And Iâm not leaving until Iâve had your legs around my shoulders and my name in your throat.
Your whole body tingles.
petal.crush:
You sure you can handle me?
lowtone.sin:
Baby, Iâve been waiting for this for years.
Iâm gonna make sure you never forget the first night we stop pretending.
And just like that, you're already aching for round two.
Even if it hasn't even begun yet.
__________________
Part 2
Author's note: This idea has been in my head for a while now so I had to let it out. I originally planned to write a sexting smut that felt more authentic to the story, as this is set on a sexting app, I wanted to include all the elements to it like actual images(just as one does in smaus), audios of them moaning or whimpering yk, short video clips and all but I realised I'd get reported if I did that so I had to keep it limited to words. Hope y'all liked it still. This format was a new one and I struggled a bit with it but still enjoyed working on it nonetheless.
kim mingyu & choi seungcheol from seventeen
and how is it y/n fault that the two (fantastic) one night stands were not just best friends, but room mates.
word count: 3.6k
warnings: threesome smut !! reader has a vagina & tits, name calling, p in v, effiel tower, oral sex both m & f receiving, breastplay, kitchen sex, cheol loves to motorboat you, daddy kink, sir kink, mingyu is a lil sub while cheol is a huge dom, big cocks!gyucheol as it should be, vouryerism masturbation, overstimulation, double creampie, sex without a condom (pls wrap it !!!), filming, mirror sex, hair pulling.
a/n: surprise !!! wrote this right after watching the pretty woman music video, sat in my drafts and now it's my thank you for 200 followers after realising how hot it truly is. thank you for the support and i canât wait to keep writing for yall <3
You smiled at the dark hair, hot, fit man that peacefully slept next to you. Glancing at the clock that read 6am, you realised you've overstayed your welcome as you slowly and quietly creeped around his bedroom to change back into last night's clothes (without the shoes or your purse, that's at the front door) and even stealing a piece of minty gum that was on Mingyu's desk. But you truly would not be able to guess, the surprise on what was on the other side of the door when you opened it.
You winced at the sound the door made, trying to be as quiet as possible. Facing the door as you quietly closed it; it wasn't until you turned around to head to the front door nearby that you almost screamed. There stood, in all his hot blonde hair glory, clearly ready for a morning run by his attire was the last guy you hooked up with not even a week ago.
You looked around the apartment in shock until your eyes went back to him, his initial shocked reaction from seeing your presence now turning smug as he recognised you as much as you recognised him.
"You know, I thought you dipping like that before I woke up meant you didn't want to come back?" he asked.
Rolling your eyes with a hard chew to the gum still in your mouth, you gave him a fake smile. Acting sarcastic not wanting him to know how shocked you were but nonchalant instead. The fact Seungcheol stood shirtless in front of you, giving you flashbacks of the night from a week before, was not helping.
And he knew it.
He walked towards you, locking you in between his body and his room mate's bedroom door.
"Tell me angel, was my friend better or was it me?" Your chest was heaving, inner thighs tightening together as your eyes carelessly wandered to his lips, your inner demon just wanting them back onto yours and Seungcheol did exactly that.
It wasn't sweet. It was rough, needy and eagerly full of lust. His tongue entering your mouth to swipe the gum and somehow place it in his own mouth. He wrapped his arm around your waist to pull you in as your skimpy little club skirt was now grinding on his running shorts, as your hands ravaged his fit body. The grip on your ass was your signal to jump as he carried you more into their apartment, and to their kitchen. Seungcheol laid you down on their kitchen counter, making you shudder at the coldness but his body being on top of you as you both still heavily made out kept you warm. His hands unzipping the corset top from the front leaving your breasts bare for him as his lips move from your mouth to your tits.
"So you always go to clubs without a bra on?" he teased. You could only whimper as his fingers played with your nipples licking a stripe in between your breasts to then use his huge hands to basically smoosh your tits over his face to motorboat you. Hearing his groans in between your chest, you can't help but giggle.
"What's so funny?" He asks, biting your tit as he removes his face from your chest.
"You have a thing for motor boating?" You asked, recalling him doing the same thing as he fucked you last time.
"Well, it's because these tits are perfect, just as much as this pussy is." Seungcheol explains as one of his hands creeps under your skirt and cups your pussy tightly. It made your back arch and a loud moan escape, by quick reaction you covered your mouth with your hand as you look to the side where Mingyu's door is in slight fear that you were going to get caught.
Seungcheol saw this and a low growl escape, he then pulled your skirt and underwear down in one swift motion.
"I've been thinking about how fucking good you taste all fucking week, jerked off so many fucking times thinking about your pussy." He admitted. Seungcheol knelt down, holding your wrists to pin your arms to the sides of your body as his also laid his biceps across your thighs to restrict your movement. He blew air onto your pussy and grinned seeing you squirm.
"Want you to be loud baby, wake him up to a good surprise yeah? Call me daddy like you did last time." Before you could object, Seungcheol spat the gum in his mouth to the side so he could dive in head first. He wasn't lying about the fact he wanted this, needed this.
"Oh my god!" you yelled, lifting your head up to see his eyes already watching your every reaction and that only made things hotter.
What he didn't know was you thought about his mouth all fucking week too, though your one night stand rule was to dip without any other contact. A part of you wished that you did get Seungcheol's contact, you hadn't had anyone eat you out as good as he did. Which is one of the reasons why you even went out last night to try to forget the need for Seungcheol's mouth, is it coincidence or pure fucking luck for your distraction to be his fucking room mate of all people.
Seungcheol ate you out so good that it was loud and wet, the slurps felt like it was bouncing off the walls and he was devouring like a thirst deprived man receiving his drink. His tongue was fucking magic, going from flicking your bud to entering you and drawing figure 8s on your pussy. To just full on mouth on clit.
"Oh daddy I'm so close!" you moaned out, as soon as you did that you could feel the grin. He then let go of your hands to use one of his thumbs to rub circles on your nub and used the other to vastly thrust two fingers in you. With his tongue still working his magic and the motion of his fingers, you were going crazy, basically now humping his face. He loved the desperation of your movements that he stopped using his hands, including fingering you to wrap both his arms around your thighs to pull you even more closer to his face. Wanting you to cum on his mouth and his desperate mouth only.
It was giving you deja vu the last time you two fucked and how you felt you were suffocating him but he didn't care and things have clearly not changed. Your back arched as the pit of your stomach only felt tighter, you moved your head to the side for only a split second and paused with your blurry vision seeing Mingyu now wide awake in the hallway.
But yet, your shock only lasted for a split second and his presence, knowing he was watching only made you get to your release sooner. Your eyes travelled downwards to see Mingyu's hard cock against his grey sweatpants and that was it, your hand reached into Cheol's hair as you released all over his mouth. You squeezed your eyes shut, unable to control it with how good and sweet the release felt.
You shrieked when you felt your pussy get slapped, a signal to open your eyes and quickly diverting your head back to Seungcheol who stood proudly. The look in his eyes full of ego as he tasted what was left of your cum on his lips, his eyes never leaving your face and reading you were not a bit uncomfortable at the surprise third guest.
"Really Cheol?" You hear from Mingyu.
"Don't be whining Mingyu, technically I had her first." Cheol said with a smirk.
You see Mingyu's face turn into realisation. The moans that spilled out of your mouth last night that sounded like heaven in his ears to the point it naturally made his hips thrust faster sounded oh so familiar because he jerked off (and came) to the same moans only a week before.
"But..." Seungcheol coughs, now leaning onto the counter to face Mingyu (but where your legs were to not cover your view.)
Cheol's hand reached to cup your breast, his two fingers rubbing your nipple so you didn't feel neglected. It was like to tell you, without words that he was nowhere near done with you despite not looking directly at you.
"I think she likes this predicament right now, hm?" His eyes, finally now looking at you as he pinches your nipple making your body jerk by his touch. The eye contact between you and Seungcheol heavy, like he needed to read your facial expressions and how you were feeling.
"Does this little slut like knowing that you have two hard cocks wanting you right now?" You could only whimper at the dirty talk, your pussy still wet and brain mush from how hard he ate you out. Seungcheol's hand moved from your breast to your chin, cupping your face.
"Use your words darling, say you want us both right here at the same time and we're all yours." Seungcheol explained.
You nodded fast, in the back of your brain knowing how utterly pathetic you must look but you didn't care.
"Yes! Yes! I want both of your big cocks right now, please daddy." you begged to Seungcheol, then looking at Mingyu now standing closer to the both of you. You address him. "Please sir."
And here you were. On all fours in Seungcheol's king size bed with his mirror closet giving you a view of how you looked when your eyes adverted to the side. You looked like a mess and it was a view all three of you wanted planted in your brains forever.
Mingyu, standing on one side with his huge cock in your mouth had you using one arm to steady yourself and the other to play with his balls. His hands were in your hair to balance himself as he harshly thrusted into your mouth.
Seungcheol, standing on the other side has his large cock slamming in and out of your pussy from behind. One hand gripped your hip tightly throughout the whole fucking while the other hand would go from gripping your other hip to thrust in you roughly to slapping your ass just when he felt like it. It was loud and messy, tears ran down your face at the pleasure.
Though Mingyu was thrusting in your mouth, you made sure to swirl your tongue to give him even more pleasure. Your eyes couldn't leave the sight above you, despite it being so blurry from the tears in your eyes. Mingyu was so fucking pretty. The way his eyes scrunched but forced himself to stare at you with his mouth agape and the grip on your hair tightening to signal when your mouth did a really fucking good job.
Mingyu was fighting a war with himself. He was shutting his eyes because the pleasure was getting to him but god, did he also want to see your pretty, teary eyed face that included seeing your eyes roll back from the pleasure Seungcheol was giving you.
For Seungcheol, he loved every minute of this. He also thought Mingyu was endearing when he was getting his cock sucked, of course this wasn't their first time sharing.
With your second orgasm approaching, you felt yourself getting closer to your release before Seungcheol was even done. You wanted to release Mingyu's cock to give a warning of your orgasm but his grip on your head was so tight. You didn't have to say anything though because Seungcheol knew you were close from how much your pussy was tightly gripping his cock.
He moved both his hands back to your hips, thrusting faster and harder that his balls slapping against your ass echoed throughout the bedroom.
"I know you're close baby, give it to me, coat my cock with your cum so I can paint you white." Cheol chanted, it only made your eyes roll and Mingyu grin at the sight once again.
"Fuck she love this." Mingyu moaned out, his hand going from your hair to your face and with both hands using his thumbs to stroke your hollowed out cheeks.
"Does princess like getting creampied? Want me to cum in your next?" Mingyu questions, you nod fast in his hands.
With Cheol's brutal pace and a grip on your hips that will leave bruises, you cum hard. Your arms losing the balance of keeping you upright making your mouth leave Mingyu's cock and though he hissed at the cold air. He rather cum in your pretty pussy than your mouth anyways.
You moaned and cried onto the bed, your body spasming at the pleasure. But Cheol didn't give up despite the new position. Still thrusting into your pussy vastly as your walls clutched onto his cock, you felt so fucking wet and tight that he couldn't help himself and came right after you. In you. The feeling of his cum spurting into your gummy walls only made your body yelp more, your hands gripping onto the sheets tightly.
"Thank you daddy! Thank you!' You screamed into the bed. Making more spurts of cum from Cheol come out.
Mingyu could have came at the sight of both of you orgasming knowing he was next.
You couldn't dare lift your head up, feeling slightly humiliated and knowing the makeup from last night probably looked even more messy as your chest was heaving. Pussy twitching. But that didn't last long as you felt yourself get flipped. Your back now laying on the bed as the two men switched places without you realising, you steadying your own breath was all you heard and focused on.
Mingyu smiling widely at your shock as he softly stroked your outer thighs.
"Ready to take me princess?" He asked. With your need to be their good girl, you nodded.
"Words" Mingyu sternly said.
"Yes sir, nee-" before you could finish your sentence about needing his cock. A large shriek fell out your lips as he pulls your body closer to the edge of the bed by your legs; to wrap them around his waist.
"Sorry for surprising you baby, but I'm not sorry for this." Mingyu utters and before you could question what he meant.
He thrusted his huge cock all in, making you loudly scream. The stretch hurt but my god was it delicious. Seungcheol was huge in the sense of his length, while Mingyu was huge from his girth. Both easily stretching you in different and addictive ways.
"T-Thought Seungcheol's cock prepped you already but you're still so fucking tight. Fuck ... babe." Mingyu stutters, chants, breathless.
You don't miss the weight of the bed dip as Seungcheol now sits beside you.
You reach your hand out to stroke Seungcheol's semi-hard cock to become hard again, but he hisses and smacks your hand away.
"Did I say you could touch?" He tells off, you whimper in response.
Instead of being closer to you, he moves away until his head leans against the bed's headboard. Legs criss crossed as he began to stroke his own cock while watching you get fucked. Your eyes never leaving each other as he does this, he smiles at your pout, finding you cute as your brain whines on how this isn't fair.
Before you could further complain, Mingyu readjusts his hips that he finds the spot you needed. It makes you gasp, your attention diverting back to him as he himself wears a similar pout to you.
"Pay attention to me too baby" he complains.
"I-I'm sorry sir! You fuck me so good sir, p-please don't stop" you moan out and praise. Back arching, eyes shutting as your delicious tits are bouncing from the thrusts, both Mingyu and Seungcheol can't stop watching your chest as one strokes his cock faster while the other penetrates you faster.
You can't control it any longer, your orgasm approaching and your mouth spewing every noise your throat can make. Mingyu fucking you so good, you don't even register how tight he's holding you or how Seungcheol's moaning with you. Unable to say any words, with a scream you come once again. Mingyu nearly topples over with how your pussy grips his cock while you orgasm, knowing why Seungcheol nearly lost himself as well.
With Mingyu's hard cock still plugged into you, not moving to let you have a breather both your eyes go to Seungcheol whose cum is splattered all over his stomach. You feel drool leave your mouth and both of them snicker seeing this.
An idea sparks in Mingyu's head, he takes his cock out of your warm pussy and before you whine of the emptiness he plunges two fingers in you.
"Get on all fours baby and lick daddy's cum off" Mingyu orders, both you and Seungcheol are surprised to hear him take control for the first time throughout this ordeal.
It makes you eagerly listen and as you move, reposition yourself. Mingyu's fingers never leave you. Instead he joins kneeling on the bed behind you, once you face Seungcheol you attempt to lower your head but Mingyu grabs your hair to lift your head up. You yelp in surprise but love the delicious burn like you did when you were sucking his cock.
"Film it on the bedside table Cheol" Mingyu orders, nodding to the phone on the same table and Seungcheol smiles. You feel your pussy flutter and cheeks blush at the same time,
"Hm, I was going to ask if that's okay angel but seems like it is. Naughty girl" Mingyu announces as he kisses your back softly.
When you hear the noise of the phone camera recording, you see it on the bedside table on selfie mode perfectly capturing all three of you.
"Lick baby" Mingyu orders again and lets go of your hair, just for it to be held in a makeshift ponytail by Seungcheol. You lower your head and lick a stripe of his load on Cheol's stomach, the salty and sticky liquid on your tongue making you hum as Seungcheol watches your every move of continuously licking his body. Hissing as you casually try to take his semi-hard cock's tip after licking his cum up. His cock was sensitive but if you went to suck him off, he wouldn't object.
At the same time, Mingyu unplugs his fingers to thrust his cock back into you. The motion making your lips that were around Cheol's tip now take his cock fully and deeper into your mouth.
"Oh shit" Cheol moans out, his cock now fully hard.
You wish this overwhelming pleasure of sucking Cheol's cock and Mingyu's fast thrusts mixed with your wet and full of cum pussy would never end. You bob your mouth up and down Cheol's shaft, tongue feeling his veins.
Seungcheol knew he wasn't going to last long, his free hand not in your hair gripping the pillow beside him as he thrusted into your mouth. Now he understood Mingyu's predicament before, he couldn't describe how good you sucked cock even if he tried.
Mingyu was in the same predicament, not knowing how much longer he can hold on as your tight pussy continues to grip him from the pleasure of sucking cock and Mingyu thrusting into your pussy so deliciously.
The fact this was the fourth orgasm they were pulling out of you and so close to your third, you were close as well. But with full persistent you wanted daddy to cum first, with the one hand not steadying your position just like you did with Mingyu. You played with Cheol's balls while deep throating him. That was all it took, as his load spilled into your mouth. Despite thinking you swallowed all of it, when your mouth left his shaft. You felt liquid still around your lips and leaving your mouth like drool but the warmth and thickness of it made you realise it was his cum on your lips.
"Oh fuck" Seungcheol quietly whispered, chest still panting. He grabbed the phone off the bedside table to film your face close up, your fucked out face was both beautiful and a fucking mess.
"F-Fuck I'm close" Mingyu panted behind you, using one of his hands to start rubbing your clit to get you closer. You bite your lip, tasting the cum. Seungcheol still filming every bit of this.
"Mingyu look at the phone" Seungcheol points out, moving it to the side a bit to still capture your makeup ruined face while letting Mingyu have his view.
The sight of your pleasured out face was all it took for Mingyu, cumming in your pussy with a scream from his lips. The sensation making your own pussy spasm and cum for the fourth time, both of them had massive loads that felt like they were filling your cunt to the brim. Just like before, your arms give up on you. Head plopping onto Seungcheol's thighs as he softly strokes your hair.
Mingyu grabs the phone from Seungcheol with shaky hands, now filming from the side right next to where his cock and your pussy were as your hips were still upright. Finally unplugging his cock, you and Seungcheol watch from the phone as Mingyu watches with his own eyes how the mix of all three of your cums trickle down your thighs, drops falling onto the bedsheets.
All three of you are sweaty and tired beyond belief, you feel your own eyes drooping to a shut on Cheol's thigh not even getting to see who was cleaning the sticky mess on your legs with a towel. All you heard and felt before your slumber was a kiss on the shoulder, hair strokes and a sentence of
pairing â choi seungcheol x f!reader x kim mingyu
summary â when choi seungcheol, your ex-boyfriend, shows back up in your life, you realise that you still want him. you have a boyfriend though â and he wants him too.
wc â 12k
warnings â nsfw. minors dni. themes of infidelity (but no cheating happens), hurt/comfort, alcohol consumption, intoxication, pet names (baby, angel) smut, blowjobs, deepthroating, vaginal and anal fingering, cunnilingus, size kink, threesome, unprotected double penetration (piv and anal), everyone is bisexual, no strict d/s dynamics, squirting, creampies, implied polyamory
authorâs note â my longest oneshot ever and it only took me like 4 months or something ermâŠ.. we got sooo much gyucheol content for the comeback though and it made me lock tf in!! and of course i had to make it gay so this is for all my fujoshis mwah. extremely self-indulgent but i hope u enjoy because i think i ate a lil
dedicated to em @gyuswhore for hyping my idea up and ofc to the gyu to my cheol, rika, whoâs the only reason i still write <3
Youâre pretty certain youâre going to marry Kim Mingyu.
Itâs a thought you have quite often, but what prompts it this time is your boyfriendâs big, warm hand sitting on your bare thigh, and how he had looked carrying over a pint of lager for himself in one hand and a gin and tonic for you in the other. Itâs what heâll get you when he knows you donât feel like getting drunk, because you donât like the taste of gin enough to drink it in more than slow sips.Â
The summer nightâs air is humid. The sun had set a few hours ago yet its heat still lingers, sticking to your skin. Being on a rooftop bar means a breeze brushes by every once in a while â a vague, temporary respite.Â
Mingyu, who runs his own small fashion brand, is telling his friends about one of the nightmare clients he dealt with recently, and youâve already heard this story, but your boyfriend is so charismatic and animated when he tells stories that you canât help but give your full attention.Â
That attention is swiftly drawn somewhere several feet away, when someone saunters onto the rooftop. For the first time in your life, you feel time stop moving. Youâve read it happen in books, watched it in movies, and youâd always imagined it was hyperbole. Melodrama. But as youâre sitting there, itâs like everything around you actually stops.Â
You tell yourself youâre seeing things; itâs the alcohol; heâs several metres away and you canât see his face properly. You canât do anything but stare and blink as you watch him greet some of the other people who you donât know with hugs and pats on the back in a manner that looks so familiar it sends a cold realisation down your spine.Â
Mingyu is still engrossed in conversation, and in an ideal world you would join in with him, looking effortlessly nonchalant. Instead youâre sat frozen with utter bewilderment in your features, with a million questions in your head, with your heart beating so fast it feels like itâs trying to escape your ribcage.Â
He starts to walk over then, and your eyes lock with his, and for some God-forsaken reason you canât tear them away.Â
What do you say? How do you act? How are you even supposed to go about this? Mingyu doesnât even know heâs your ex.
Fuck.
âChoi Seungcheol?â comes Mingyuâs voice, booming with surprise, cutting off your whirlwind of thoughts to give you a different whirlwind of thoughts that includes how the fuck do they know each other?
Mingyu stands up, sauntering over to the man and pulling him into a hug.
âYah, Kim Mingyu, did you get taller?â Seungcheol says, scanning your boyfriend up and down with a grin as he pulls away.
âNo, hyung, I think youâre just getting shorter. You know, the way old people do.â
âWow⊠Still as annoying as you were in college?â
Their laughs harmonise. You still canât take your eyes off your ex-boyfriend.
Seungcheol is different now, but heâs also the same. His head-turning charm hasnât wavered â youâve been in his presence for a minute and thereâs heat crawling up the back of your neck from you hoping heâll look your way. The boyish confidence heâd had is now a manly one. Never arrogant, but he knew his worth then, and he undoubtedly knows it now.Â
His hair is longer. Itâs dark, like it always was, his bangs framing the sides of his face. You used to tell him he looked most handsome with it this way. He looks older, yet he hasnât aged a day. In a way he looks younger, in fact â his cheeks have filled out, his skin flawless.Â
Heâs bigger. Heâs wearing an oversized leather jacket, but heâs far broader than you ever remember him being. He always did like working out.Â
It hits you like a train â youâre still attracted to him. Of course, heâs attractive. But you still want him. The flicker of desire and hunger he gave you; your affection for him â none of it ever really died out.Â
While your boyfriend and your ex-boyfriend catch up, you take the opportunity to pick up your drink, pluck the straw out, and gulp down every last drop.
Reality rears its head when Mingyu says, âah, this is my girlfriend, by the way. Baby, this is Choi Seungcheol. We played football together in university.â
You gulp, shifting your weight from one foot to the other.Â
Seungcheolâs eyebrows raise at you, not judging but inquisitive, and he pauses like heâs waiting for you to speak first, like heâd hate to say the wrong thing.
âMingyu, um⊠Seungcheol and I⊠Used to be together,â you say, picking at your nails as guilt makes your body heavy.
âHuh?âÂ
You donât have the courage to look up at him, knowing exactly what kind of kicked puppy eyes youâll be greeted with if you do.Â
âIt was years ago, ah⊠Was it seven? Seven years?â Seungcheol pipes in and fuck, his immediate coming to your rescue doesnât help the fact that youâre supposed to be over him. âIt was right after I graduated, so, itâs been a while.â
You can only nod, finally turning your gaze to Mingyu just to find him exactly as you thought you would: looking like a kicked, hurt puppy. Whatâs worse is the glint of disappointment in his eyes that are usually gleaming when theyâre on you.
âYou never told me,â he says, quiet, like he canât muster up anything more.
âI mean, it never came up! How was I supposed to know you two knew each other?â
Mingyu stays silent. Eventually, he speaks again: âcan we go? And talk about this at my place?â
âBut itâs only 11:30⊠You really wanna leave already?â
âYeah, I do,â he says, throwing a not-so-subtle sideways glance in the direction of Seungcheol, whoâs standing there awkwardly.
âOkay then, letâs go,â you say.Â
You know your boyfriend well, yet youâre still surprised when Mingyuâs hand catches yours loosely. He is the clingiest man in all of South Korea, however, and if he doesnât get his physical touch fix heâll die, and so despite the fact that he wants to be mad at you, how could he possibly not hold your hand?
Heâs on his phone the entire elevator trip downstairs and the moment you step foot outside of the building, heâs leading you towards a taxi, parked and waiting for him. Still he opens the door for you, and if it was anyone else you would be quick to assume that itâs an attempt to soothe his bruised ego â to prove heâs better than Seungcheol. But this is just Mingyu. He was raised to never put his morals aside for anything, especially not for petty fights with the love of his life.
The short ride home gives you time to contemplate. You feel bad â of course you do. Youâll do anything to avoid hurting your boyfriend in any way, considering he treats you as though he was put on this Earth to worship you. Youâre quite certain, however, that Mingyu is just being sulky. He doesn't have a jealous bone in his body, so itâs uncharacteristic of him to be envious of another man for having had you once, which means the only reason heâs upset is solely because he feels left out for not being in the know about you and Seungcheol.Â
The taxi pulls up to Mingyuâs apartment building and he doesnât waste a second before paying, clambering out of the car in haste, bounding over to your side in three long strides, and opening the door for you.
He lets you into the apartment first, slips his shoes off, and heads straight to his kitchen â unsurprising.Â
âAre you hungry?â he asks, already pulling ingredients out of the fridge. You settle onto one of the barstools at the kitchen island, watching him move without so much as thinking about what he needs to do next. Itâs all instilled in him. You find it one of the sexiest things about him.
âYes, but I thought you wanted to talk,â you say.
He stays silent, however, more focused on mincing garlic while he chews on the inside of his cheek.Â
âMingyu, if I had known that you and Seungcheol were familiar, of course I would have told you. How was I supposed to know he was more than just some guy to you?â
âItâs not that,â he says eventually.
âThen what?â
Silence. Heâs dicing an onion with the skill of a chef with a twenty-year career.
âThereâs no way youâre jealous, are you?âÂ
No answer. Heâs not disputing it.
âOh, Mingyu,â you sigh pitifully, sliding off the stool and rounding the island until youâre behind him, your arms snaking around his waist. You shove your face into his gorgeously toned back, nuzzling your cheek into his warmth, feeling him freeze, tense, and relax in your hold all in the span of one second. âCan you put the knife down and hear me out, please?â
The sound of chopping comes to a stop, and you presume he picks up a towel to wipe his hands before shifting in your embrace. You let go of his waist, taking a step back so he can turn to face you, his solemn face wringing your heart and making you reach forward so you can have your hands on him again, settling them on his chest.Â
âYou know youâre all I want, right?â
âWhy did you and Choi Seungcheol break up?â
You pause, blinking at his forwardness. Then you sigh, dragging the memories of six years ago to the forefront of your mind. âHe got offered a graduate position in New York. We tried long distance for a few months, but we couldnât do it. We were both so busy, and there was such a big time difference, and it was all just making us go crazy.â
âSo you only broke up because he went overseas?âÂ
Youâre not stupid. You know what heâs implying, and now you understand that maybe he wanted to hear that you and Seungcheol had ended on bad terms, or lost feelings, or because he had cheated. At least then he wouldnât have to worry about you going back to him.Â
âMingyu,â you sigh. This time it has an air of frustration. âIâm over him now.â
You swallow the sour taste the words leave in your mouth.Â
It was easy to say that your feelings for Seungcheol had dissipated when he wasnât around; when he wasnât there to remind you of how he had once loved you. Seeing him again today proved otherwise.Â
Then again, you only saw him for five minutes. You spoke one sentence to him, lusted over how much hotter heâd gotten, and then Mingyu was dragging you away from him.Â
âAre you?â he asks. For a second you wonder if he can read your mind.Â
âYes, and Iâm with you now. My tall, strong man who can cook and sing⊠Who takes care of me and fucks me good⊠Who has such broad shoulders and big biceps,â you tell him, watching him fail to bite back a smile, and heâs rolling his eyes too, cheeks turning pink as he melts from just a few of your buttery words.
âWhat, you only like me for my physical appearance?â he teases.
You shoot him an unamused look.Â
âYes, because all youâre good for is being my accessory,â you quip. âCan I suck your dick now?â
âHuh?! All of a sudden?â
âJust wanna show my appreciation for my man,â you hum, sinking to your knees in front of him, pawing lightly at his crotch.
âYou canât just solve things with sex, baby,â he argues, but heâs groaning as you press your face against his clothed length, mouthing at it through his jeans.
âConsider this part of my grovelling,â you say, reaching for the button until Mingyu grabs your hand.
âNo,â he says. Your blood runs cold. Heâs done with you, isnât he? Then he speaks again; one word that makes your body temperature soar right back up â âcouch.â
You rise to your feet at lightning speed, grabbing his hand and dragging him to the living area like youâre running out of time, pushing him onto his couch and dropping to your knees again between his legs. This time he lets you undo the button and the zipper, lifting his hips as he helps you tug the pants down his legs, struggling to keep up with you as you grab at the waistband of his Calvin Kleins, not faltering even a little in the way you move like a starved animal.Â
Heâs only half-hard when his cock springs free. When your fingers wrap around him heâs too thick for them to touch and itâs quick to have you drooling â literally. You lean forward, dribbling spit over your hand, smearing it up and down his shaft as you pump him to full hardness.Â
Mingyuâs humming already, his head falling against the back of the couch from the first lick of your tongue at his tip. You adore how sensitive he is; how little you have to do to make him fall apart. Itâs a testament to how smitten he is, he likes to tell you.
Your mouth wraps around him, then youâre swallowing as much of him as you can handle (which is not a lot, considering he has a monster between his thighs) with a hand curled around the base of him. As you pop up, your hand does too in tandem, jerking him off and taking him in and out of your throat simultaneously.
Mingyu is reeling already. His head is fuzzy, the ceiling spinning above him. His hand grips at the couch, the other rooting itself in your hair. His gasps and sighs quickly turn into moans as you work him with more and more vigour every minute.Â
Itâs hard to hear or concentrate on anything else when you have cock down your throat, so when Mingyu whimpers something that sounds like âfuck, hyung,â it doesnât even register to you. Youâre more concentrated on sucking his soul out, just as lost in the sensations of his tip prodding at the back of your mouth as he is on your warm mouth enveloping him.
Tears gather in the corners of your eyes. Spit pools from your mouth and glistens down your fingers. The noises youâre making are utterly depraved â slick, gagging, guttural moaning. Donât you know you drive him fucking insane?
His head is heavy when he raises it to peer down at you. Youâre some kind of succubus, he concludes, when he finds your eyes staring back at him, bleary and full of adoration.Â
âGod,â he whines, clutching at your roots. His voice, low and buttery, makes you gush. âKeep going just like that, fuck.â
Itâs a little funny; how youâre supposed to be the one grovelling and yet itâs Mingyu whoâs begging. Either way, itâs not like you plan on stopping.Â
Youâre taking more of him now; almost to his base. You fight against your gagging, too eager to make your man fall apart. Pulling off him, you catch your breath while swirling your tongue around his red, leaking tip.Â
âSo pretty like this, ah-arenât you?â he says, but the strain in his voice utterly betrays his composure.Â
Your effect on him is what gives you the confidence to swoop down and start to swallow every last inch of him. When your nose hits his pelvis, Mingyu can no longer keep it together.Â
He cums with a whimper, spurting his load down your throat, and you take every drop like a good girl.Â
Mingyu is blushing and blissed out as he eases you off his cock gingerly. He gives you a moment to catch your breath â one, two â then heâs tugging you into his lap, faced away from him, your back to his chest.
Your skirt gets pushed up and you whine when his fingers slip into your panties and trace along your folds.Â
âLook how wet you are,â he says, low and gruff, his breath hot on your ear. âJust from having dick in your mouth.â
Your only response is a pathetic little sound, your brain already void of any thoughts. Mingyu slips two of his fingers into your hole â shallow, just the tips of them â only to pull them back out and circle your clit instead. He does this a few times: dips in, dips out. Plays with your clit. Teases your folds. Itâs not long before your hips start bucking, begging.
âBaby, pleaseâŠâ you sigh, but impatience bleeds into your attempt at sounding pitiful.
âMm? What do you want?â he asks, then his thick fingers slide into your hole, all the way to his knuckle, leaving you squirming. âThat?â
âYes, please,â you gasp, clenching around his fingers that dip in and out of you steadily. Quickly his touch becomes not enough though, and you would hate to be so greedy, so all you do is whine his name, not pleading for anything; behaving for him.
Mingyu reads you well, however. Heâs completely in tune with you. Sometimes, perhaps, too in tune. He speeds up his wrist, revelling in the way your legs tremble when he does. Then he crooks his digits upwards, curling them right against that sensitive patch deep inside you. You almost scream.
His fingers drag in and out of your cunt with purpose. All you can do is cling to the arm heâs wrapped around your waist and let him finger fuck you into oblivion. Youâre growing closer every second, if the the squelching sound of your growing arousal is anything to prove it.Â
You can practically see your edge â heat is pooling in your abdomen and itâs ready to burst. Then, just as youâre about to tip over, Mingyu pulls his fingers out of you.
âWhat theâ fuck you!â you sob, itching and aching now that heâs left you high and dry. Thereâs a stream of curses coming from your mouth as Mingyu shifts you around in his lap so youâre facing him. Heâs grinning up at you, because he finds everything you do both amusing and endearing, and it takes everything in you not to smack his pretty face, walk to his bathroom, and finish yourself off without him.Â
âYouâre so mean,â you exclaim, letting him raise your hips off his lap and line up his hard-again cock with your sopping entrance.
âSorry,â he sings without an ounce of remorse. âI wanted revenge.â
Next thing you know, heâs sheathed inside you, every last inch of him buried in your pussy.Â
âMin-gyu! Fuck,â you cry, hands flying to brace yourself on his shoulders as he starts fucking into you with abandon.Â
Youâre gasping, and so is he. His hips are so fast and powerful, years spent in the gym perfecting his physique manifesting in the way he drives his cock in and out of you, hard and precise. He seems to hit deeper with every thrust, his biceps flexing as he grips your hips and bounces you up and down his cock too. Like heâs eager to ruin you.
âTaking me so good, baby,â he says. His voice is breathless and a little gruff. It makes you melt a little.Â
You havenât even cum once yet, but youâre soaked. Mingyuâs thighs glisten with your juices, growing wetter with each time his cock dives back in you.Â
No one else could fuck you like this. No one could reach so deep, so hard, so fast, stretch you out this good, make you feel this full.Â
Well, except maybe one man.
The next time you glance down at him, your boyfriendâs eyes are replaced with anotherâs: a haunting shade of brown that makes you shiver. Itâs a different pair of lips grinning up at you. The next time you blink heâs gone and Mingyu is the one beneath you again.Â
He knows youâre going to cum before you do. Your pussy clenches uncontrollably, your nails sinking into his sunkissed skin. Your whines donât stop; an incoherent, breathy mess of pleas and chants of his name. His hips are unrelenting, spurred on by your depraved state and the way he holds your pleasure in the palm of his hand.Â
Mingyu barely lets up as you climax, bliss making you tremble in his hold. You bury your face in his neck, filling your lungs with his warm, woody scent as your orgasm racks through your body and makes you sob.
Even as you come down, Mingyu doesnât falter the pace of his thrusts. Your nerve endings are lit on fire; raw. Itâs too much, and yet you want nothing more than the sensation of his release filling you up.
He hears your pathetic whimpers of his name in his ear, coaxing.Â
âGyu⊠cum in me? Please?âÂ
Then his fingertips on your waist become bruising, and heâs dragging you up and down his cock almost brutally, as though youâre nothing but a toy. You clench around him subconsciously, your tightness forcing him closer to his edge. Itâs the finishing blow.
Mingyu cums with a whimper. His fingers sink into the meat of your ass, holding you down so he can bury himself as deep as he can and fill your insides with his seed.Â
His head drops back against the couch as he catches his breath. You sit up, your eyes finding his. Warmth floods your chest as a post-coital affection sets in. It seeps into the way you cup his face, tracing his nose and lips.Â
Contemplation simmers in his gaze. Then, âcan I tell you something?âÂ
You push dark strands of hair out of his face. Youâre not sure why he needs to ask.
âAlways,â you reply.
âBack in university⊠Ah, how do I even say this?â He swallows as he considers his words, and now your mind is running. âThe thing is, I wasnât just teammates with Choi Seungcheol⊠I had a crush on him.â
When the next weekend rolls around, Jeonghan decides that everyone should go clubbing. While youâd much prefer to spend your Saturday night huddled around the TV with wine and takeout, dating Kim Mingyu means that thereâs no getting out of a night out. Heâll never pass up an opportunity to go to the club. Itâs a red flag to some. To you, itâs taking your dog to the dog park so that it can socialise and get its energy out.Â
You meet your friends at an old downtown bar first, quickly greeting them all with a hug and squeezing onto the sofa next to Yoon Jeonghan himself.Â
âIâll go grab us drinks,â Mingyu says, waiting until you give him the okay before he disappears.
Next to you, Jeonghan elbows you playfully because thatâs his idea of striking up conversation.Â
âSo, Choi Seungcheol didnât get in the way of you and Mingoori,â he says, never one to hide his nosiness. Itâs how heâs up to date on everyoneâs latest drama â he doesnât shy away from prying.
âWhy, were you hoping he would?â you ask, but your tone doesnât contain any animosity. On the contrary, you match Jeonghanâs impudent teasing with a grin.
âWhat do you take me for, Satan?âÂ
Your look warns him. Do you really want me to answer that?
He snorts. âAnyway, Mingyu told me everything. Have you talked to Seungcheollie since?â
âNo⊠And even if I still had his number and socials, why would I?â
Jeonghan hums. âMaybe he was concerned. Heâs back in Korea for good now, anyway, so Iâm sure youâll see him again.â
You glare at him, at his stupid, gremlin smile, and you hate how good he is at making you utterly, completely puzzled. Itâs not the fact that your ex-boyfriend is now back in the country, itâs the weird unspoken implication of Jeonghanâs words. The one that you canât seem to figure out.Â
âYouâre bothering me,â you say, deciding youâre no longer interested in this conversation and standing up from the seat.
âYeah, Iâm good at it.â
You send him a sneering look, still in jest, before walking off in the same direction Mingyu went.Â
You find him quickly; after all a six-foot-two man is not that hard to spot. Heâs leaning on the bar counter as you sidle up to him.
âHi,â you say.Â
âOh, hey. Why didnât you stay with the others?âÂ
âGot bored,â you reply, curling your arms around one of his biceps.
âYeah? I left for two minutes,â he laughs. âI know youâre just being clingy.â
You pout at him, refusing to confirm or deny his statement. Just then, the bartender wordlessly sets two drinks down in front of Mingyu and vanishes to serve the other customers before either of you can thank him.
âWhat did you get me?â you ask as he hands you one of the tall glasses, filled to the brim with ice and amber. Spiced rum, maybe.
âWhiskey,â he tells you, holding his own glass towards you. You clink with him, then you take a heavy, reckless swig, much to his dismay. âEasy, baby.â
Heâs so hot that youâre almost inclined to obey. Being bratty is just a little more fun, though.
âHmm, you have to take care of me either way,â you taunt, reaching for his hand and leading him back to the table where everyone is sitting.Â
He sighs, but heâs smiling fondly.Â
For the next hour, you chat with your friends; laughing, telling stupid anecdotes that will be told again, slowly getting more and more tipsy. A unanimous vote soon decides on âone last drinkâ, so Mingyu stands, and you follow.Â
After he orders and pays, he turns to you. âIâm gonna go pee before we head to the club. Stay here?âÂ
You nod assuringly at him, then he leaves you to wait for your highball to be concocted. When youâre a woman in a bar, however, youâre never alone for long.
âCome here often?â a manâs voice asks.Â
âOh, I have a boyfrie-âÂ
Your automated, practiced line dies on your tongue when you turn towards the voice and see who it is.
âS-seungcheol!â you exclaim.Â
âHey. Whereâs Mingyu?â is the first thing he asks.Â
He looks handsome. Scratch that â he looks hot. Heâs just in some baggy jeans, an oversized black t-shirt with some graphic scrawled on it, and a thin gold chain around his neck. On most men it would be a basic outfit. Choi Seungcheol looks like an A-list celebrity.Â
âOh, he went to pee,â you answer, hoping and praying that the din and chatter of the bar swallows the way your voice shakes. You hate the effect he has on you â you literally dated him, for Godâs sake!
Seungcheol laughs at your bluntness and you swoon. You missed his dimples and the way the corners of his eyes would crinkle when he smiled. You missed the way he held your gaze with such affection when you looked at him. His bergamot scent radiates off of him and engulfs you; the same one that used to live in your closet when it was filled with borrowed hoodies. Youâre just a girl fresh out of college again.Â
âOh, by the way, Iâm sorry about the other night,â you say before your thoughts can wander off. âItâs not like I was keeping the fact that we were together from Mingyu, or anything. Iâd told him about an ex a couple times but never specified anything. Iâd moved on, so I just didnât really think it was important.â
Telling Seungcheol now that youâd moved on from him tastes like a lie, especially with the way your heart is fluttering like youâre talking to your crush. Your body heats when it sounds like he picks up on it.Â
âMoved on from me, huh? Stings a little,â he says. Heâs grinning, but you know Seungcheol, who doesnât really have an ego per se, but rather a need to be coddled, and so you know heâs not entirely joking.
âI mean, have you seen who Iâm dating now? Besides, youâre telling me you donât have a girl? You?â
âAnd what does that mean?â he presses, lips still curled upwards.
âYou know what I mean. Answer my question,â you say, taking a sip of your drink and honing in on the way the cool liquid glides down your throat â grounding yourself. You might do something embarrassing otherwise.Â
âYou still think Iâm hot.â
Your drink nearly flies back up. You swallow it just before it can. âWell, Iâm not blind.â
âWell, to answer your question, no, I donât have a girl. I had my hands full with work pretty much the entire time I was in the US,â he says, shrugging.
You shouldnât feel relieved. Why do you feel relieved, for Godâs sake? Oh wait â itâs because you canât stand the thought of him with another girl.Â
âSo then, how come youâre back in Korea?â you ask, taking another sip of your drink.
âIâm finally starting my own company here.âÂ
Well, you have a thing for founders, you guess.Â
âAnd how is th-â
Your words get cut off again, but itâs by your boyfriend this time.
âChoi Seungcheol!â he calls out, as though itâs his first time seeing him again. Â
âHey, Kim Mingyu,â Seungcheol replies as they go in for their dap-to-hug greeting.Â
âSorry for last weekend,â Mingyu offers. He almost looks⊠Shy. âI was kinda stupid for that, and, um, I hope it didnât make you feel too uncomfortable.â
Seungcheol waves his hand dismissively. âI knew that me being back in Korea would be a little weird for everyone. I just hope things got sorted out between you two.â
You and Mingyu side-eye each other.Â
âTheyâre definitely sorted, yeah,â you say, clearing your throat to hide your laugh.
âHave you ordered a drink yet?â Mingyu swoops in, suave as ever.Â
âAh, Iâm debating if Iâll even go after. Just wanted to stop by and say hi to some of the guys.â
âUh-uh. Weâre taking shots and youâre coming with us,â Mingyu insists, flagging down the bartender and ordering five shots â two each for him and Seungcheol, one for you.Â
Seungcheol protests the entire time, but evidently itâs lighthearted as he knocks back the liquor along with you and your boyfriend. Somehow, nothing feels out of place.Â
After that, the three of you head back over to your friends, who are gathering their things and getting ready to go. When your eyes meet Jeonghanâs, heâs staring at you with the same look from earlier: the sly grin that makes you narrow your eyes at him. Then Mingyu slings an arm around your shoulders and leads you out of the bar and Jeonghan dissolves into thin air.
The club is just a few streets away, and when you get there, you waste no time before you and your boyfriend are on the dance floor.Â
As the night goes on and more alcohol enters your bloodstream, you become ignited.Â
Lights strobing. Music pounding. You, moving mindlessly along with the bass pumping through your body, your head fuzzy with something euphoric. Sweat coats your skin and your limbs feel weighted, yet the only thing that could stop you from dancing is if you dropped dead.Â
Mingyuâs hands are an anchor around your waist, his hard chest flush to your back. Heâs taken his jacket off, and his t-shirt is soaked through with sweat too.Â
A few feet away, Seungcheolâs eyes lock with yours, sending an immediate shiver down your spine. Itâs the rooftop bar all over again. Only this time, youâre buzzing with boldness.Â
Your hand reaches for him. Thereâs a beat of hesitation, of questioning, but then heâs shimmying his body through the crowd. You crane your head back to meet your boyfriendâs gaze and heâs grinning, a silent understanding. The assurance it gives you makes you float.Â
The next time you blink, Seungcheolâs right in front of you. You donât think twice when you reach for his shoulders that are begging to be grabbed and pull him right up against you, sandwiching yourself between the two of them. Itâs shameless. You donât have a care in the world.
Youâre surrounded by pure muscle. Two sets of arms, abs, chests are pressed to your body, rock-hard and toned, with enough strength in them to pick you up like you weigh no more than a feather. Mingyuâs crotch rubs against your ass, Seungcheolâs to your front. Itâs like a wet dream come true.Â
Something finally dawns on you then, in your drunken daze as you grind yourself between the two men. You still want Seungcheol, yes, but thatâs not to say you donât also want Mingyu.Â
No â you want them both.Â
At the same time.Â
With both of their thick dicks splitting you open- woah.Â
The countless glasses of soju youâve had manifest in the words you say as you tug Seungcheol towards you and bring your lips to his ear.
âDid you know Mingyu used to have a crush on you?â
Something shifts then. Seungcheol pulls away from you, eyebrows pulled together in disbelief, yet when he looks past you, at Mingyu, his eyes simmer with traces of something else â intrigue, almost, and simultaneously knowing. Heâs not averse to it, and that makes you giddy.
âWhat?â Mingyu mouths to him.
âYou used to have a crush on me?â The music drowns his voice, but Mingyu gets the gist, and Kim Mingyu doesnât tend to run from his problems, but in that moment all he can think to do is grab you by your wrist, shake his head in a weak denial, and drag you away to somewhere else. Anywhere else.Â
The thick air of the club soon falls away, the cooler air of the night wraps around you, and the music becomes the one that is muffled. There are some smokers scattered here and there in the enclosed area heâs taken you to, but all youâre focused on is your boyfriend as he runs a hand through his hair.
âWhy the hell would you say that?â he asks, but heâs so soft when he scolds you. Never will he raise his voice at you.Â
âI dunno, to make things interesting,â you say, your words slurring a little and a small, playful grin on your face.
Mingyu huffs, throwing his head back in exasperation. All of a sudden, Seungcheolâs voice rings out: âyah, are we in middle school?âÂ
You and your boyfriendâs heads whip towards him as he enters the smoking area with that sexy smirk he always has.Â
âHyung, she was joking,â Mingyu blurts out.
âI donât joke about serious things. You moaned âhyungâ when we were fucking!â
Your boyfriend claps a hand over your mouth and your fingers latch onto his wrist, trying to pry it off of you.Â
âSheâs drunk,â he continues while you wriggle in his hold.
Seungcheol laughs, sounding both flustered and amused, and Mingyu realises that between the three of you, heâs the only one whoâs being serious.Â
âItâs not a big deal to me,â Seungcheol says.Â
Mingyu is lighter the second he hears it. His hand loosens on your face, but he doesnât take it off yet.
âYouâre a hot guy, Mingyu.â
Before the weight of his words can settle, you free yourself from Mingyuâs grip, gasping dramatically. âCan Cheollie come home with us? Pleaseee?â
Youâre batting your lashes up at your boyfriend as he opens his mouth to reply, but Seungcheol beats him to it.
âAlright angel, I think youâre a little too drunk for that, donât you?â
âI think sheâs a lot drunk,â Mingyu says, giving an exasperated chuckle.
âOkay, Iâm a little drunk, but whooo cares? I want to fuck you both even when Iâm sober, and you two wanna fuck, so we all win,â you say, finishing your sentence with a hiccup.
Seungcheol and Mingyu share an amused look. Mingyu snaps back into boyfriend mode a second later.
âAlright, come on, baby, letâs go home,â Mingyu says, taking your hand gently.Â
âBut Iâm having fun,â you whine, but you donât fight against him either.Â
âYou wonât have fun with a hangover in the morning,â he teases, tugging at your hand. âLetâs go.â
âUgh, fine. Bye, Cheollie,â you say, waving haphazardly at your ex-boyfriend. âThink about that threesome, yeah?âÂ
Mingyu groans and Seungcheol just laughs. He doesnât say anything else, only a small âgoodnight.â Unbeknownst to you, your drunken words have wormed their way into his mind, and heâd be lying if he said he hadnât made up his mind already.Â
When you wake up, your eyes are heavy, your head pulses with a dull pain, and you need to pee so bad youâre scared you wonât make it to the bathroom.Â
With determination, you haul yourself out of bed and waddle to the ensuite, feeling pretty triumphant when you donât pee your pants.
When you glance into the mirror, you find that your face is bare and even moisturised. Thatâs when you remember Mingyu herding you in your drunken state into bed and feeding you enough water to make you complain about how much youâll have to pee⊠Case in point. You assume somewhere along the way he must have wiped your makeup off and done your skincare, too.Â
The urge to be with him is overwhelming, so you shuffle out of your bedroom like an anxious cat and sigh with relief when you find him lounging on your sofa.Â
âGood morning,â he says in his cute, babyish tone, glancing up from his phone to find you sauntering towards him.Â
His arms open automatically when he realises youâre about to toss yourself on top of him, curling around you as you bury your face into his neck.Â
âHow are you feeling?â he asks, rubbing his warm hands up and down your back.
âHead hurts a little.â
He responds with a sympathetic hum. He sits with you in silence for a while, holding you, stroking you. He would tell you to take pain meds, but youâll just whine about only wanting cuddles.Â
A few moments later, he speaks again: âso, do you remember any of the crimes you committed last night?âÂ
You groan into his chest, then push yourself to sit up and straddle him. âDonât say it like that⊠Was I that bad?âÂ
âWell, you grinded between me and Seungcheol-hyung, then you outed me to him, then you asked him to have a threesome with us.â
You slap a hand over your mouth, assuming the worst. Youâre about to contemplate ending your life for ruining your relationship with both Mingyu and Seungcheol, but the grin on your boyfriendâs face tells you youâre probably being a little dramatic.Â
âI only remember dancing with you both. Did I seriously tell him about your crush on him?âÂ
Mingyu nods and guilt makes a pit in your stomach.Â
âYou wanted him to come home with us,â he continues.Â
Your hands cover your burning face. âFuck, Iâm s-â
âDo you still want that?â
Just as quickly you move your hands away to look at him. âWhat?âÂ
âDo you want him to join us? The only reason he said no was because you were drunk out of your mind, you know,â he says, giggling. Does that mean..?
âWhat about you?â you ask. Youâre starting to shake your unease.Â
âHaving sex with both you and Choi Seungcheol is my dream, baby.â
Your face breaks out into a grin. Images start to spring to your mind, of being sandwiched between them again, but this time youâre all naked, and theyâre both grunting and moaning in your ear, and calling you all sorts of obscene things, and-
âThen when are we doing it?â
Your boyfriendâs smile turns mischievous.
âI was texting him this morning. I told him he can come over tonight if you still wanted it.â
âTonight?! Let me go shower,â you say, jumping off of him, feeling as though someone dumped a bucket of ice over your head.
âWhat- why are you trying to impress him?â Mingyu yells, sounding vaguely offended.
âIâm not, dummy, Iâm still sweaty from the club!â
Seungcheol is supposed to arrive any minute and youâre sweating with excitement.
âI have to go to the bathroom,â you tell Mingyu, your voice surprisingly steady.
He only gives a hum before you leave him and skip to your ensuite.Â
You find yourself staring into the mirror again, mentally cursing Choi Seungcheol for igniting such an anticipation in you. Itâs not like you and Mingyuâs sex life is boring â itâs incredible, actually. Thereâs just something about another person entering it. The cherry on top is that itâs Choi Seungcheol, who you had just as good a sex life with. Who you know will satisfy you. Who Mingyu is attracted to, too.
When you emerge from your bedroom you almost scream. Heâs stood there in the middle of your living room, looking effortlessly hot in just a hoodie and shorts. Not to mention, Mingyu is standing next to him.Â
Two beefy men, and they both have huge cocks. You must look like a deer caught in headlights.
âDonât get shy now, babe. You wanted this,â Mingyu coos, slinging an arm around Seungcheol.
âIâm not shy,â you lie, but with the confidence of the hottest woman alive, you turn on your heel and make your way back to your bedroom. âLetâs go.â
They follow you like dogs.Â
Mingyu shuts the door behind him, the click loud against the heavy, charged air. As you sit upon your bed, they stay standing, watching you like theyâre wolves and youâre a piece of meat. You wait for one of them to move first, but theyâre staring as though theyâre waiting for your permission. Well-trained.
âYou know, Iâve kissed both of you already. I think itâs only fair if you two make things equal,â you say with a shrug. You want them both on you immediately, but this wonât go anywhere unless you break some boundaries first.Â
Thereâs a beat as they glance at each other, catch sight of one anotherâs mouths, then Seungcheol grabs Mingyu by his shirt and pulls at him until their lips collide. Their kiss is timid at first; the layers of their relationship engulfing them, the gaze of a one-person crowd burning into them.Â
Mingyu quickly turns greedy though, and the feelings he thought he had buried years ago come crawling back to the surface. He takes, and Seungcheol lets him â lets him lick into his mouth, lets him bite at his lips, lets him settle his hands at the back of his neck and draw him in even closer until their breaths and skin become one.
Between your thighs, a warm pulse has become impossible to ignore. You clench your legs together, but it does nothing to quell the want that drips out of you and drenches your underwear at the sight of your lover and your past lover lost in one another like this.Â
You wish you could say you donât feel even a tinge of jealousy. Or maybe itâs that you feel excluded â you canât quite pinpoint it, but something makes you pout and decide to shove your sweatpants down your legs and pull your (Mingyuâs) t-shirt over your head. Their attention falls back on you as soon as you do.
âSomeoneâs feeling left out,â Mingyu teases.Â
Seungcheolâs too busy drinking you in with a look so intense it gives you goosebumps. As you sit there, perched politely, his eyes rake down your neck, your chest, your hips, your thighs. Your heart beats so loud you wonder if he can hear it. You want to know what heâs thinking. Is it about the way he used to touch you? Mark you? Is it how youâve changed since the last time he saw you bare like this? Do the memories of where his teeth and hands have explored come rushing back to him?
Suddenly youâre burning under his gaze, pulling your eyes downwards, playing with the ends of your hair.
Seungcheol steps forward, gingerly hooking a finger under your chin. He tilts your head up, making you look at him once more.
âHow are you more beautiful than I remember?â
Your skin turns searing and his deep, husky words go straight to your core. Itâs embarrassing how weak you are. You fear what will happen when he touches you properly.Â
You move without thought, rushing to your feet, standing an inch away from him.
âKiss me, please,â you say, softly.Â
Itâs not that he hesitates, but he doesnât move immediately, and itâs so that he can stare at you for a little longer with what you can only describe as relief. His lips quirk into a tiny smile, then heâs leaning down to slot his lips against yours.
Kissing him tastes just as you remember. It was always so easy to get lost in it â the way he made you feel as though you were in control when really it was him pressing his tongue against yours and deepening the kiss and weaving his fingers into your hair to pull your head back a little and turning you putty in his hands. He kisses with a hunger thatâs frightening yet with a greed thatâs arousing, but above all he kisses you so fervently that it makes your stomach boil with an impatient, selfish want.
âMingyu,â you mumble against Seungcheolâs lips, pulling away from him to crane your head to look at your boyfriend, whoâs standing and observing with the patience of a saint thatâs so characteristic of him. âTouch me.â
You didnât think youâd be the one calling the shots in this arrangement. Not when Seungcheol, who thrives on being in charge in every aspect of life, would be here. You visualised yourself as the toy they would share, to use and get off with for their own base desires. The truth is, you presume, that Seungcheol feels like an intruder, and that Mingyu also feels like an intruder. Youâre the bridge between their gaps.Â
Mingyuâs hands quickly settle on your waist and he plasters himself to your back, his lips leaving a trail of kisses along your shoulder.Â
Meanwhile, your hands are like a catâs devious paws as they play with the hem of Seungcheolâs t-shirt. He gets the hint quickly, pulling it over his head with a timid laugh, and instantly the air is punched out of your lungs.
Seungcheol is huge â broad, defined shoulders; thick biceps; perky pecs. The image of pure strength and power. And itâs not that he used to be super skinny or anything â he always loved working out â but heâs so well-built now that all youâre thinking about is the ways he could pick you up, toss you around, bend you at his will, and take from you whatever he pleases.Â
You turn then, with Mingyu as your next victim. While you peel his t-shirt off and he rids himself of his sweats and boxers, Seungcheol plays with the waistband of your panties, pulling them down your legs and reaching to cup your pussy, only you grab his wrist to stop him.
âWait, wanna suck you off first,â you say, falling to your knees in front of him, your hands moving straight to the band of his shorts. âYouâre clean, I presume.â
âOf course,â he says, sly.Â
You convince yourself itâs abstinence.Â
âMingyu, would you like to help me?â you ask next.
Your boyfriend is frozen for a moment, but after a beat heâs dropping to his knees next to you as you pull Seungcheolâs shorts and boxers down his legs. Both of you gape as his cock springs free, bobbing there in its thick glory.Â
âWas it always this fucking big?â you mumble, wrapping your fingers around it, biting your lip when the tips of them donât even touch.Â
Mingyu is enamoured as he watches you lean forward and drop a glob of spit on the tip. Instinctively he reaches for your hair, bunching it up out of your face. Seungcheol feels himself going crazy already.Â
You slather your saliva down his shaft, pumping your hand up and down until youâre satisfied with how wet he is, aching for the taste. You suck at the head first, your soft lips closing around it, your tongue circling it and lapping up the first few salty beads of his precum. Mingyu peers up to watch Seungcheolâs reaction when you take the rest of him down your throat.
He looks like a god above â plump, cherry red lips parted, eyes half-lidded because he refuses to not watch, abdomen flexing, the soft moans as he revels in the feel of your mouth for the first time in years like a pornographic melody.
Your head bobs up and down, one hand stroking at the base, a combination that would send any man into the clouds. He hadnât realised how badly heâd missed your dirty mouth, and now heâs already trying to stave off an orgasm.
âJust like that, baby, missed the way you suck me off,â Seungcheol purrs.Â
Youâre a little minx that doesnât like being told what to do though, so you pop off of him suddenly, turning to look at Mingyu.
âYour turn,â you grin.Â
Mingyu is reluctant â heâs never done this before, and youâre objectively way better than him at it, and this is his fucking college crush (which, clearly, never really went away).Â
âIâll help you. Donât worry,â you assure him, winking.Â
People often tell Mingyu that heâs good at everything, even if heâs never done it before. That, as well as your words, are all he needs to hear to lean forward, wrap his hand around where yours is gripping Seungcheol, and take his cock in his mouth.Â
He starts with shallow bobs, and Seungcheol is sighing with bliss. It scratches the part of Mingyu that itches to be praised, spurring him to life. Itâs all he needs for the pinpricks of insecurity to wither away, and soon heâs mimicking your techniques, sucking the manâs dick like his life depends on it.Â
Your mouth latches on next to Mingyuâs, your lips and tongue dragging along Seungcheolâs length, eliciting a punched out string of swears from him as he wonders who he saved in a past life to deserve this: getting his dick sucked by a gorgeous man and a beautiful woman at the same time.
Whatâs worse is how sloppy the both of you are with it. Saliva drips from your lips as they mingle with Mingyuâs. Youâre slurping, Mingyuâs moaning, youâre both half-kissing each other, sharing spit and precum. Itâs the lewdest thing heâs ever witnessed.Â
âGod, wait, stop before I cum,â Seungcheol groans, pulling both of you off of him. He throbs at the thought of painting your faces with his cum, but right now thereâs nothing more that he wants than to fill you up again. Before he does that, though, he wants a taste of you.
âMingyu-ya, play with your girlfriend while I eat her out,â he orders, catching his breath.
Mingyu doesnât have to be told twice. Youâre about to settle against the pillows before he scoops you into his lap and his big hands spread you out like a platter for Seungcheolâs enjoyment. Seungcheol comes crawling up the bed to you, his willing prey, until heâs right between your legs in a long-awaited homecoming, giving no warning before he dives in and drags his tongue through your folds.
When Seungcheol eats, he is not precise; on the contrary, he is sloppy, and heâs also practiced. Despite all the years that have passed, heâs still an expert in the study of you, and every lap of his tongue against your pussy has the ability to make you writhe. He was always good at it. Hungry. Starved, even. But what once bordered on learned technique is now replaced with skill, not to mention a pure, genuine desperation to taste the way you fall apart.Â
He buries himself in your cunt â nose to your clit, tongue flat against your folds as he laps up your juices. For the past seven years heâs been thinking about your pretty pussy, and now that he has her again, heâs going to indulge.Â
âCheollie- God, so good,â you moan, burying a hand in his hair.Â
Your head lolls back onto your boyfriendâs shoulder as Seungcheol swirls his tongue over your clit. Mingyuâs arm is wrapped around you, gluing you to his warm, sticky chest, and one of his hands cups your tits, kneading at them one by one, pinching at your nipples until they become pebbled. It turns you into an even bigger wreck, drawing pathetic whimpers out of you and making you squirm in his hold.
Then Seungcheol prods a finger at your entrance, sliding it in and curling up, finding your sweet spot so seamlessly that you cry out. He knows you like the back of his hand. He also knows you can take another, so he slides a second thick finger into your heat and starts thrusting them in and out, all the while his tongue still swipes over your clit. Your thighs try to snap shut, but heâs far stronger, and he keeps them pinned to the bed with ease.Â
âBe good for Seungcheol-hyung, baby,â Mingyu coos in your ear while his hands continue to tug at your hard nipples. All of it is dragging you dangerously close to your high.Â
âClose, angel?â Seungcheol asks, his mouth glistening with your juices, his fingers dipping in and out of you with a squelch each time. Heâs grinning, triumphant. âPussyâs clenching so much.âÂ
âYes, Cheol, gonna cum,â you gasp, and with a few more thrusts of his fingers, his tongue slurping at your cunt, and Mingyu playing with your tits, the knot in the pit of your stomach unravels, and youâre crying out with incoherent bliss.Â
Seungcheol works you through your orgasm, and when youâve stopped trembling for the most part, he pulls his fingers out of you. His eyes fall straight to Mingyu as he holds your limp body. He moves towards the man, holding his hand to Mingyuâs lips.
âTaste her,â he says. Two words that hang heavily in the air.
Mingyuâs mouth parts, obedient as he lets Seungcheol push his soaked digits against his tongue. He wraps his lips around his fingers and sucks, moaning softly as he cleans them of your cum, indulging in the taste of you on Seungcheolâs skin.Â
Seungcheol lets out a shaky breath, Mingyuâs round eyes gazing at him. He pulls his fingers out of his mouth with a pop, cupping Mingyuâs face before he leans in to press their lips together.
Itâs even messier this time. Mingyu chases your essence on Seungcheolâs tongue, licking into his mouth with desperation. Thereâs something unbelievably intimate about it â them sharing your taste despite the fact that youâre right there.Â
Seungcheol pulls away first, letting out an airy laugh at how dazed Mingyu looks. His dark hair is a little unkempt, his cheeks flushed, his eyes glazed over with something saccharine.Â
This feels right â all of it, you in his arms, Seungcheol next to him. Mingyu didnât expect that it would feel this right. Heâll have time to think about it later, though. Right now he has a sulking you in his lap and an almost painful erection between his thighs.
âIâm sorry, Mingyu-ya, but can I fuck her?â Seungcheol asks, but itâs more rhetorical than anything.Â
âI think you should ask h-â
âPlease, fuck me! Someone, anyone,â you cry. Your desperation should make you embarrassed, but youâre splayed out on a bed with two Roman gods above you, so you donât really care.Â
âYes, maâam,â Seungcheol smirks, shuffling back between your legs and grabbing his member so he can line it up with your pussy.
You wish you could say youâre used to the stretch of Seungcheolâs cock, but the girth is something that never gets easier to take. Mingyu is just as big, after all, and taking him as often as you do (which is often) doesnât help to ease the feeling of being torn in half. Regardless, itâs a welcomed stretch, and one that youâve missed dearly.Â
Seungcheol knows itâs a challenge to take him, so his hand is between your legs, his thumb playing with your clit. Your legs tremble as he pushes into you, your walls welcoming him home. Heâs so thick that it punches the air out of you, making you clench around him before heâs even started moving.Â
His eyes are on you the entire time, until his pelvis is flush to yours and youâre gasping with delight.Â
âFuck, I missed being in this pretty cunt,â he grunts, then the last semblance of discipline he has is gone and heâs fucking you, hard.Â
Seungcheol, too, channels the strength heâs built up over years into his thrusts, hips rocking into you in a powerful, expert motion. Itâs not just the roughness that makes you see stars though. Every slam into you has his cock grinding against your sweet spot, feeding the embers of heat in your belly.
Mingyu sees himself as you for a second, with Seungcheol rutting into him over and over. The dampness of his leaking cock against his abdomen becomes hard to ignore then, so he cups your face, his thumb on your chin, the look in his eyes a silent request that makes you drop your mouth open and stick your tongue out for him.Â
He strokes along the length of his cock as he nears you and pushes it past your lips, hissing as you swallow every inch of him until youâre gagging and there are tears welling up in the corners of your eyes. You love when he abuses your little throat like this, always begging him to but he feels too guilty. Tonight, youâre desperate and willing.Â
âGonna let me fuck your face, baby? Give Seungcheol-hyung a little show?â Mingyu grits out, wrapping a hand around your throat softly, not pressing, just relishing in the way he can feel the way heâs lodged down your oesophagus.Â
Seungcheol fucks you with something animalistic â something that wasnât there before, when you were dating him. It could be that heâs older, more experienced. It also could be something more⊠possessive. Years of pent-up emotions and regrets spill into the relentless pace heâs set, into the bruising way he grasps at your curves and tits.Â
Heâs spurred on by the sight of you with your pretty mouth full, grunting as his eyes zero in on the way your lips stretch around Mingyuâs cock; on how it disappears in and out of your throat while salty, hot tears leave tracks down your cheeks. Mingyu looks ethereal too, his head tossed back with absolute bliss; his eyes fluttering shut; his Adam's apple bobbing.Â
If heâs being honest, Seungcheol always thought he was cute â his tall, goofy teammate who was two years younger than him, who looked up to him although his skills already rivalled Seungcheolâs own abilities. Now, as he watches Mingyu bite down on his bottom lip and fuck your face, he thinks heâs fucking hot. A small part of him wishes he was in your place, but thatâs for another time, he thinks.Â
The clench of your cunt around him pulls his attention back to you, dragging a groan out of him. He grins at your devilish ways, angling his hips so that he can reach impossibly deeper inside your guts.Â
âStill such a greedy little thing,â Seungcheol says, gritting his teeth from the tight grasp your pussy has on him, suffocating almost. âI bet Mingyu spoils you too, huh?â
All that he gets in reply is a moan muffled by the dick in your mouth. His soft laugh drips with something sadistic.Â
Heâs not holding back his rough, hard strokes, his thighs clapping against your skin with determination. Your eyes are rolling into the back of your head, and something in both men urges them to make you fall apart â to break you.
Mingyu pulls out of your mouth for a moment, a string of your spit following the tip of his cock. Youâre gasping for air, your throat raw, but that doesnât stop you from blurting out your next demand.Â
âCheol, fuck, wait- want both of you in me,â you say, smacking at his abdomen. Apparently youâre feeling it too; the need to be wrecked. You want mercilessness. Want to be whittled down to nothing but a hole.Â
Seungcheol freezes. Mingyuâs breath hitches in his throat. They exchange a look, one charged with thrill, but even more with uncertainty.Â
âAre you sure you can handle that, baby?â Mingyu asks, wiping at the tears that wet your face. Itâs not meant to be condescending. Itâs not him undermining you. Still, you take it that way.Â
âYes,â you say with full confidence.Â
Seungcheolâs cock twitches where itâs still nestled inside you. Heâs beaming, pride etched into his features.Â
âHow do you want us, then, baby?â he asks.
You hum in thought. Both of them are huge, which means that either way itâll be a lot to handle. You almost want them to blindfold you and do as they please with you, but you know the touch of their hands, the warmths of their skin. Ultimately, what you come up with is this:
âCheollieâs never fucked my ass.â
Seungcheol groans and pulls out of you. His cock is red hot, the tip weeping. Next to you, Mingyuâs is just as angry, leaking, begging to fill you.Â
Youâre done for. You canât wait.
You point at Seungcheol. âSo you in my ass,â you say, then you point at Mingyu, âand you in my cunt.â
Thereâs a faux-innocent smile on your face that drives both men to the brink of insanity. Theyâre both thinking the exact same thing â they have no idea how theyâre supposed to last.Â
Seungcheol huffs out a breath. âHands and knees, then. Gotta open you up first.â
Thereâs a thrill to being ordered around by him, and it manifests in how quick you are to flip over and prop yourself up, wiggling your ass for him.Â
âI bet if you wanted to stick it in straight away sheâd let you. Beg for it even,â Mingyu muses, pushing hair out of your face. âSheâs just that hungry for cock.â
Seungcheolâs hand smacks at one of your cheeks, making you bite your lip as heat rushes through you. Youâre clenching around nothing, pussy drooling despite being empty.Â
âYeah, I see that,â Seungcheol chuckles. âYou have lube?â
Mingyu leans over to the nightstand closest to him, pulls open a drawer, and grabs the half-empty bottle before tossing it towards Seungcheol.Â
You jolt as he drizzles the cold liquid all over you, smears it over your skin a little, then his fingertips come to circle your rim.Â
Seungcheol canât help but laugh at the way youâre whining from his light touch alone. He would love to tease you a little longer, but his dick is so hard now that itâs bordering on agonising. So he presses one of his thick fingers into you, breaching the tight ring of muscle and slipping in all the way to the knuckle with the aid of the lube.Â
Itâs a different kind of delicious, one that sends a wave of goosebumps along your entire body.
âShe can take two,â Mingyu says, with a fist around his cock as he watches Seungcheol play with you. âAlso, anal makes her loud.â
Seungcheol doesnât doubt him, swiftly adding a second slicked up digit. Like clockwork, you let out a breathy moan that gets louder when he starts to drag his fingers in and out. Your hands fist the bedsheets as he scissors them, stretching your hole with each pass. Thereâs a dull warmth blooming in your belly, but his pace is simply not enough.
âMore, Cheol,â you keen, arching your back.
âYou want another finger?â he taunts.
âI want your cock.â
âI donât know, baby,â he says, a third finger entering you. Youâre clenching around them with a whine, sucking them in, your holes greedy. âYouâre still a little tight.â
The squelch as he starts to dip in and out of your hole a little faster is shameful, not to mention the depraved noises coming out of your mouth. A mix of lube and arousal drips down the backs of your thighs, dirtying the sheets beneath you. Youâre a mess, and his cock isnât even in you yet.
It doesnât take long before Seungcheol is pulling his fingers out of you and swatting a hand against your ass again.Â
âI think sheâs good to go,â he says, lips stretched into a hungry smirk.Â
âLoosened her up enough?â Mingyu asks, settling against the pillows once more and tapping at his thighs to beckon you over. You crawl to him on shaky limbs, crashing against his chest once youâve straddled him.
âProbably, but I also got a little impatient,â he admits shamelessly, shuffling over between Mingyuâs legs while pumping along his shaft. âAw, did she tap out on us?â
âNo! Iâm ready,â you say, jumping where youâre perched in Mingyuâs lap. God forbid they go easy on you. You reach between you and Mingyu, grabbing his cock, lining it up with your hole, and sinking down on it in one fell swoop.
âAh, fuck, baby,â Mingyu sighs, gazing at you as your hands find his shoulders. His lips, swollen from being bitten, beg for you to kiss them, so you do.
Behind you, the click of the lube bottle makes your walls clench instinctively. Seungcheol coats his cock with liquid while Mingyuâs hands grab at your ass to spread you open for him. Seungcheol takes a moment to revel in the sight: you, glistening with sweat and lube, pussy stretched around Mingyuâs length, your holes about to be split open by both of them.
The blunt head of Seungcheolâs cock presses to your ass. All of the slickness makes it pop inside of you with little resistance, and the stretch that follows is unlike anything youâve ever felt before.
You nearly cry out when both men have their heavy cocks fully sheathed inside of you. Theyâre so thick and so deep, and youâre so full that you feel it in your throat. Itâs so indulgently good that you find yourself at your edge already, digging your nails into Mingyuâs flesh to stop yourself from giving in so fast.Â
âYou good, baby?â Mingyu asks, giving your waist a squeeze.
Your eyes squeeze shut to stop tears from welling up in them, and you nod frantically. âItâs just so much⊠But, like, in a really good way.â
Seungcheol kneads at your asscheeks as he speaks. âJust say when you want us to move-âÂ
âMove,â you whine, arching your back, reeling your hips back in search of any friction â which youâre soon granted.Â
Seungcheol starts to thrust, but thereâs caution in the way he moves. Mingyu, on the other hand, is a little more ruthless.Â
âHyung, can you feel me?â your boyfriend gasps, near-slamming his cock in and out of you, his patience fracturing now that heâs finally able to plunge into your heat.
âF-fuck, yeah, I can,â Seungcheol grunts. Heâs lost in the way your ass sucks him in, in the tight, wet warmth, in the way he can feel Mingyuâs cock through the thin velvety wall of your insides, finding himself absentmindedly picking up his pace.Â
Thick, muscled arms wrap around you. Large hands grip and pull at your skin. Youâre being bounced up and down one cock, dragged along another, both so fat that your walls are getting carved into the shape of them.Â
Your orgasm comes quickly and ungracefully. You scream, then your walls are clenching and youâre gushing all over Mingyuâs thighs. Everything is tight, your vision blurry. Your brain short-circuits. Seungcheol stops moving, Mingyu comes to a slow grind of his hips. The only thing keeping you conscious is your boyfriend peppering soft kisses all over your face.Â
âGood fucking girl,â Seungcheol groans, leaning forward to nibble at your shoulder, giving a shallow thrust inside your ass.Â
âDid that feel good?â Mingyu asks, cupping your face so that you look at him.
âSo good,â you say, voice cracking. âWant you and Seungcheollieâs cum, though.â
âHyung, should we give her what she wants?â
Seungcheol hums. âI think she deserves it⊠Mingyu-yah, switch with me.â
He pulls out, yanking you off of Mingyuâs cock by your waist, making you yelp as he flips you around like youâre weightless and sits you pretty on top of your boyfriend again.Â
Mingyu doesnât protest, gripping the backs of your thighs to pull them up towards your chest and spread you open. He reaches around to line his cock up with your ass this time, gliding into you with ease at this point. Above you, Seungcheol enters your pussy once more, and it is no less delicious than every other time.Â
They donât waste any time before getting back to work. Seungcheol draws circles on your clit, an action that makes your whole body quiver, your nerves alight with pleasure and overstimulation.Â
Theyâre moving with more vigour than before. Thereâs something more primal in the way they fuck you now, letting greed fuel their thrusting. Your needs are put aside as they slam into you with abandon, panting and moaning from deep within their chests, teeth gritting, neck veins popping, muscles clenching, hair clinging to their sweat-soaked foreheads. Despite their shifted motivation, the band of pleasure in your own abdomen is threatening to snap again.
The room is a cacophony of wet squelching sounds, the smacking of skin against skin, the chorus of moans of all three of you. It is depravity; it is sin. You want to spend forever like this â indulging.Â
They start to twitch almost simultaneously inside you.
âGonna cum soon,â Seungcheol growls, adjusting himself so he can plough into you even harder. Tears of euphoria spill down your face.Â
âMe too,â Mingyu whines.
âCum in me, please! Fill me up,â you sob, clinging to whoeverâs hands are on your thighs.
Mingyu spills into you first, the tightness of your walls too much for him to handle any longer. He whimpers in your ear as his hips jerk and he empties every last drop inside your ass.Â
Not a moment later, Seungcheol practically roars, driving his cock as far as he can into your pussy and becoming still as he spurts hot cum into your walls. All of you stay like that for a second, revelling in the warmth, panting as you try and catch your breath. Then Seungcheol pulls out slowly, leaning back on his knees, suddenly a voyeur as Mingyu also pulls out and eases you onto the sheets next to him.
Youâve never felt so elated as you do now, with two loads oozing out of both your holes. Your limbs have gone lax, the bedsheets a cloud beneath you, lulling you to a slumber.Â
âIâll go run her a bath,â Seungcheol announces, leaving Mingyu to draw shapes across your sticky back.Â
âDoing okay, baby?â he asks. The room fills with the sound of water running from the en-suite.
âMm. Sleepy,â you murmur. âThat was everything I ever dreamed of.â
Mingyu laughs. âYeah, me too.â
thank you for reading! likes and reblogs are much appreciated <3
pairing â choi seungcheol x f!reader x kim mingyu
summary â what happens after youâve slept with your boyfriend and your ex-boyfriend?
wc â 1.5k
warnings â nsfw. minors dni. smut, pure filth, threesome, double vaginal penetration, size kink, creampie, polyamory, a little surprise at the end ;)
authorâs note â this is so short and iâm sorry but i just wanted u guys to have this while i work on the next gyucheol wip which will be a little longer! i think iâm going to make this its own little universe hehe
this is set in the same universe as âbyob (bring your own boyfriend)â. it is recommended that you read that first as this fic is a continuation of the plot :)
You, Mingyu, and Seungcheol canât keep your hands off each other.Â
After that night where they had both ended up in your bed, there were no doubts in you or Mingyuâs minds that you didnât just want Seungcheol to be an occasional guest; that you wanted him to be part of things forever. There was no denying the chemistry between all three of you anyway, let alone the love that you had for both of them. Choosing one or the other was not an option.Â
A few days later, you and Mingyu had invited Seungcheol over to talkâ to lay everything out on the table. He took some time to think about it, which was understandable. Three-person relationships werenât something you could jump into. The fact of the matter, however, was that he still loved you too, and he liked Mingyu, and so he showed up again two days later, and two became three.Â
Since then, the three of you have been going at it like rabbits.Â
The night had started messy, the way it usually does. The three of you made out for what felt like hours, going back and forth: you with Seungcheol, Seungcheol with Mingyu, Mingyu with you, all in a sloppy exchange of tongues and lips and spit, until someone (you) grew needy enough to snap. Clothes were shed, necks were bitten and marked.
You took Mingyu's cock in your mouth while he took Seungcheol's in his, but that didn't last very long. They're givers, of course, always putting your pleasure first before their own, always doing whatever it took to make you happy, however today they were just too hungry.
That's how you ended up here: your nails are buried in the skin of Seungcheol's toned back, your arms draped over his shoulders as his biceps keep you upright against his warm, damp chest and his fat cock drives in and out of you so ruthlessly that you're losing touch with reality. Behind you, Mingyu's hands squeeze at your thighs, your ass, your hips, all while his own thick length fucks in and out of you in rhythm with Seungcheol's.
You're being handled in every which way, bounced up and down like a mere ragdoll as your men use you to their pleasure. Selfish for once, submitting to their deepest primal desires. You let them. Of course you do. You take pride in the way the tight grip of your cunt makes them toe the line of their self-control.
They grunt and groan, their breaths hot against your skin, their voices blending together in a heavy, crude melody. Their balls smack against you with each thrust, and it's so vigorous that it sends fluids splashing and dripping to the floor.
It should be too much. They're challenging enough to take on their own, but they'd managed to stuff both of their girths inside your poor, weeping pussy (with an unbelievable amount of lube, of course), and the stretch was almost enough to make you pass out at first. It took you a while, but with the help of your boyfriends' soft, cooed praises, the sting of being borderline ripped apart had blurred into a deep fullness unlike anything you had ever felt before.
Now you're on the verge of both climax and insanity while your boyfriends stand up with you in their arms, treating you like a mere fleshlight.
"Doing so good for us, aren't you, princess?" comes Seungcheol's voice, hoarse and a little out of breath, his teeth slightly gritted. He knows how it affects you when he talks to youâ when Mingyu does, tooâ keeping you grounded when he prompts you to reply, yet simultaneously coaxing you closer to your orgasm. "How does it feel?"
"S-so fucking full," you manage in a whimper. It's a wonder how you can still speak, your head empty with nothing but the thought of cock.
"But it feels good, right, baby?" Mingyu rasps behind you, mouthing at your neck with those fangs you love so much, his hands squeezing at your thighs.
"Yes!" you cry, your head falling back against Mingyu's shoulder. "I love it."
"Good girl," Seungcheol groans, bouncing you up and down with a little more vigour now. "Gyu, you close?"
"Been close the whole time, hyung," Mingyu replies, his voice strained with what you now recognise as discipline. "My boyfriend's cock rubbing against mine inside our tight little girlfriend⊠I almost busted immediately."
Seungcheol barks out a breathless laugh while you whine, your cunt clenching around them both at the picture Mingyu paints.
"Please do it⊠Want all of it," you pant, reaching your hand backwards to grab Mingyu's neck, pulling his mouth to yours in a hard, sloppy kiss. It's hard to not get lost in the taste of him, your tongues tangling in a wet, hot dance while Seungcheol groans at the sight.
"You want our cum, baby?" he rasps, his hand reaching for your face, pulling you away from Mingyu with a firm hand forcing you to stare at him. There's still a lingering jealousy in his actions sometimes. You expected itâ Choi Seungcheol is possessive to his core. Though it's not like you and Mingyu are all that innocent either.
"So fucking bad," you cry, your words slurring together now.
"Cum for us first, pretty girl, then we'll give you what you want, yeah?" Seungcheol says. How chivalrous.
You give a weak whimper, neither in protest or agreement, while Mingyu moans out: "hyung⊠I don't know if I can hold out."
"Yeah, you can," Seungcheol coos with soft encouragement in his voice, but there's a glimmer of something a little darker in itâ a flash of the authoritativeness that lives deep inside in himâ and that's all it takes to quell Mingyu's argument.
The younger man bites down on his bottom lip hard, channelling every drop of discipline he's ever learned into staving off his orgasm. He tries not to think about how fucking tight it is, shifts all of his focus to grinding his cock against that sweet spot that'll have you falling apart as soon as possible.
It only takes another few moments, of course, as the deep fullness of having your pussy stuffed with two cocks becomes too much to handle and your orgasm comes hurtling towards you. You cry out, loud and depraved, curses spilling from your lips as your body becomes utterly taut with white hot pleasure.
Seungcheol and Mingyu hold you in their arms as you fall apart, their hips hardly letting up their relentless, animalistic thrusts, your walls clamping down around them so harshly that it's impossible for them not to cum right after.
And Mingyu is always a little louder when he cums, more whiny and depraved. Seungcheol whines too, only he's a little more reserved, but not out of timidness. Rather, he is usually too breathless. He runs out of stamina quicker. Doesn't have the energy to moan by the time he's finishing, too spent and exhausted from the weight of giving.
They fill you up until you're thoroughly, positively stuffed. Until it oozes out and ruins the sheets below, but even then, your men only watch, grinning like insatiably hungry dogs.
Your period is late. It shouldn't be late. It's never late.
It's just stress, you tell yourself. You're not eating right. Maybe you got your menopause early.
It wouldn't hurt to check though, you think. Just in case, right?
Mingyu and Seungcheol are at the gym together, so you tuck yourself away in the bathroom, and you wait. You're too anxious to look away from the stick as you wait, recalling every time you had taken your pill, assuring yourself that you're far too meticulous and careful to slip up.
Your boyfriends come home right as you let yourself relax with a sigh because you're rightâ there's only one line.
What you don't expect is for them to burst into the bathroom, glossy with sweat, looking pumped up in their matching tight shirts, and wearing matching little devious grins.
"Hi, baby," says Seungcheol. "We were hoping you'd shower with us."
Mingyu spots it on the counter first, but he's always been a little more attentive.
"What's that?" he asks, as if he doesn't know.
You scramble to hold it up to them. "It's false!" you insist, stifling a laugh as they blink almost simultaneously. "My period was late, so I did it just in case."
Mingyu's brows furrow as he takes the stick from your hand and holds it up close to his eyes. You want to remind him that you've⊠peed on it, but then he speaks. "There are two lines."
"Gyu, you're seeing things," you say, rolling your eyes as you grab it back out of his hand and look at it again, a little closer this time, and your heart drops to the floor.
thank you for reading! feedback, comments, and reblogs are much appreciated :)
âș pairings: yoon jeonghan x female reader
âș aus: dilf jeonghan, boyfriend jeonghan, jeonghan is a girl dad
âș genres: angst, fluff, smut (18+)
âș word count: 23k
READ PART ONE HERE
âș warnings: toxic family dynamics: jeonghan's ex is a bad person in general (a neglectful parent), talks about speech therapy, speech impediment. jeonghan is an idiot. reader is emotionally constipated. so there's A LOT OF drama.
âș smut warnings: smut with plot (this part has more plot than the previous one, you're warned), they're both crazy for each other, dirty talk, pussy eating, jeonghan is pussy drunk, quickies, make up sex, breeding kink, cowgirl, daddy kink, edging, bathroom sex, silence play, unprotected p in v sex (i'm such a bad influence, wrap it up!), creampies, mating press, yn is slightly đ€đ» bratty, dom jeonghan, aftercare. pet names: babe, baby, beautiful, darling, sweetheart, (hers) babe, daddy (his)
âș author's note: hiiii! i'm here to say thank you guys for the support in the pineapple on pizza? post! it was really nice to see that so many of you enjoyed it, so here is a part two! honestly i enjoyed writing dilf!hannie quite a lot and couldn't get him out of my brain for months so here it is, a part two lol. and this chapter is looooong, so buckle in!
also another note: this is incredibly self indulgent. like everything i write. but i think this one takes the cake.
âș disclaimer: minors DO NOT INTERACT. this post is intended for 18+ readers ONLY. please have your age stated in your blog description and try not to look like a bot please đ
âHave you seen my keys?â
Morning routines were always a mess. Something different happened every time, and somehow, even though youâve done this more than a dozen times, it was still hard to catch up.
But you were getting the hang of it.
The apartment was a controlled chaos, as you liked calling it. The air smelled of coffee and the soft fragrance that Jeonghan wore to work. Repetition was starting to have its effect as you began to associate your mornings with those two scents.
âHave you tried looking under the couch?â you asked, turning around with a small bowl in your hands. You placed it carefully on the small tabletop of Soheeâs booster seat and watched quietly as she sank her little spoon into her bowl of cereal and milk.
âI shouldâve added more milk,â you mumbled, biting on the inside of your cheek.
The little girl didnât seem to notice, though. She ate happily, kicking her feet in the air and clapping her tiny hands together as she chewed, milk dripping from the corners of her pouty mouth.
You heard a sigh, and then the sound of footsteps approaching from the hall, and you lifted your head.
Jeonghan was still buttoning his perfectly ironed shirt, his hands going lower and lower, distracting you from your initial task. You felt your lips parting before forcing any kind of control onto your facial expression. His black trousers were also yet to be fixed, but as he finished buttoning his shirt, he tucked it inside his pants, quickly fastening his belt.
You lowered your gaze to the little girl slamming her palms onto the tabletop. Sohee was dancing happily. And you were glad that you had zero witnesses to your ogling your boyfriend quite shamelessly.
You brushed crumbs off the table, picked up the empty bowl and put it away. âAlright,â you said with a sigh, pretending to be deeply focused on the morning routine. âDid you find them?â
When you looked up, you found that Jeonghan had also been staring. His eyes were trained on the scene happening before him. His mouth parted, and he appeared to be confused for a split secondâgiving himself a very brief shake. âYeah,â he smiled shyly and patted the pocket of his trousers. âUnder the bed.â
âHuh,â you grinned. âHow could they have gotten there?â you asked, innocently tilting your head.
Jeonghan sighed. The smile was still glued to his face, but it slowly brushed off as he raised his wrist to his face, looking at his watch. âIâm late,â he said, delivering the words with an annoyed edge in his tone. âFuck. Iâm so late,â he added, turning around to grab the jacket that had been previously placed on the couch.
Panic rushed in your veins. It was a big day for Jeonghan at his workâhe had a big meeting in which it was certain that he would get some good news about a project that he had proposed for the company he worked for. You knew what this meant for him.
You looked at the time. His shift started earlier than yours did, and with another twist to your stomach, you knew that he wouldnât be able to drop Sohee off at the daycare and then make it on time to his meeting.
âGo. Iâll drop Sohee at daycare,â you blurted right as he was throwing Soheeâs things into her bag.
His gaze snapped up and locked onto your face. The shock was flitting, but you were able to catch it before he blinked and parted his mouth to say something.
But you were quickerâ âHere. Take my car and Iâll take yours so I can put Sohee in her car seat. We can switch later,â you said, stumbling over your words as you fished your car keys from the pocket of your smart trousers, handing them to him.
Jeonghan straightened, fixing the wire-rimmed glasses on the bridge of his noseâyou always went a little crazy when he did thatâbut this time he placed his hands on his hips, his face thoughtful, calculating. âAre you sure? I donât want to cause an inconvenience withââ
âBabe, youâre not causing anything,â you insisted, thrusting your fist holding the keys into the space between you and him. âTake my car. Go to your meeting. Iâve got Sohee.â
At that, Jeonghanâs face relaxed, starting to approach you with a softened look on his faceâlike he could melt just at the sight of you. He took the keys from your hand. âYouâre godsent, did you know that?â he asked, his tone low as he grabbed you by the waist, pulling you to his body.
âIâm just here to help,â you said lightly, meeting his gaze as he bent his head to meet your lips with his own.
Jeonghan gave you one feathery kiss. âThank you, baby,â he whispered, pushing his lips on yours again. âBe careful, okay? Call me if anything happens.â
You smiled against his lips. âI got this,â you repeated in a sweeter tone.
Part of you was sure that Jeonghan knew this as well. But Sohee was his entire world. And he was quite literally leaving her in your hands.Â
And you were unsure as to what to think about it.
Jeonghan turned, peeling himself from your lips with a begrudged groan and placed a kiss on top of Soheeâs head. âGoodbye, sweetheart,â he cooed gently.
Your tummy twisted again. This time, the reaction was from the way Jeonghan switched into dad mode in the blink of an eye. The switch from hot boyfriend to diligent father never failed to mess with you.
Sohee lifted her head, her eyes looking at her dad, but she didnât respond.
âBe good today, okay? Eat all of your meals and try not to miss me too much,â Jeonghan insisted, trying to get her to utter something. âIâll see you later, sweetheart. Byeee,â he cooed again.
But Sohee kept looking at her father fixedly.
âSweetheart, say bye,â Jeonghan encouraged Sohee again, this time lower but still gentle.
âMaybe sheâs not feeling it today, babe,â you muttered behind him.
A few weeks ago, Jeonghan confided in you that he started to notice that Sohee often froze at the moment of speaking full sentences. Initially, he had brushed it off, thinking that his daughter was innately shy, just like himself. But as months passed by and she continued developing other social skills, he began to believe that it was something else.
âRight,â Jeonghan mumbled, not hiding the slight look of worry on his face. But he leaned and propped another kiss on her forehead before stepping back. He kissed you on the cheek, handing you the keys to his car.
âGood luck,â you mumbled, and he replied with a quick nod. You and Sohee watched quietly as Jeonghan slipped through the door.
As soon as the door clicked shut, you realized what you had gotten yourself into. It was supposed to be a simple task, yes. But it had a thousand layers of meaning beneath it. Taking Sohee to daycare was something you could do every day, gladlyâbut something felt off.
Like you were starting to cross a line, and neither Jeonghan nor you knew how to talk about it.
Taking Sohee to her daycare was one thingâdriving Jeonghanâs SUV was another.
It wasnât a particularly daring task either, but it also put your nerves on edge. After fixing Soheeâs daycare bag and your own stuff, you grabbed her first, hoisting her up your hip, and then you swung your bag and Soheeâs on your shoulder.
âReady to see your friends today, Sohee?â you asked, raising your tone into a sweet one. It felt practiced, and you remembered the first few times you ever did itâhow it made your cheeks flush in embarrassment. But after a time, you could say that you understood why people would talk in a cute way to kids, it came naturally.
âYeah,â Sohee replied, the word landing almost aloofly. Like you had just caught her in a moment where she didnât find any barriers for her to speak.
You pushed the button of the elevator and slowly moved your head to look at her.
Sohee was a perfect little girl of almost three years of age. When you met her over half a year ago, you were sure you were holding a little angel. She was gentle and sweet. Her head was full of dark hair that matched her long eyelashes, just like her fatherâs.
âOh, yeah? What are their names?â you asked, eyeing her as you stepped into the elevator with her still attached to your hip.
âDany,â she mumbled perfectly, raising her tone as though she were about to make a list of names.
âDany? Okay, and who else?â
âNora,â she said, quieter this time.
The elevator paused on its way down, opening the doors for another person to step in. You knew the conversation was over.
Sohee fell silent, lowering her gaze from you and fixing it on one point on your shirt. You realized after a few seconds that she was staring at your hand, at your painted fingernails. What made you certain was the way she raised her hands to her gaze, comparing her fingernails to your own.
Something twisted inside you, the idea of her and you doing each otherâs nails dawned in your head. And you knew what that pang in your stomach wasâpossibility. You were thinking of the future.
âHere we go,â you mumbled as you approached Jeonghanâs navy blue Kia Seltos. The fresh smell of new and clean leather still lingered inside it as you opened the door and put Sohee in her chair.
She never complained, just quietly sat on the chair and looked at you as you fixed the buckle of her safety belt.
âSafety first,â you said, trying to fill in the silence. You grabbed one of the toys from the toy basket sitting beneath her seat and showed it to her. âLook, itâs Rory!â you cried dramatically, showing her the dinosaur plushie that you knew she loved.
Sohee extended her arms and made grabby hands at the green and very cute T. rex. She didnât speak again, no matter how hard you tried to get her to say something.
The parking lot was buzzing with activity, cars coming and going, hustling parents coming in and out of the building, dropping their kids offâand you for sure felt like a fish out of water, but you didnât want to entertain the thought for too long. You signed Sohee in without an issueâthe staff mentioned that as you were dropping Sohee off, Jeonghan had phoned them to let them know you were coming in his stead.
You soothed Soheeâs hair and gave her a quick kiss on her head as she scrunched her fingers on your back, almost affectionately. âYou be good, sweetie,â you said before leaving her and turning to the parking lot, feeling strangely empty when you climbed inside the SUV.
You carried out work as usual. You didnât think about the odd feeling clawing at your heart for the rest of the morning. The second the clock hit one oâclock, your phone started vibrating, snapping you out of your monitor screen. You scrambled to get your phone, only to see Jeonghanâs face on the screen.
âHello?â you responded with a hushed tone, looking over to see if you had interrupted the workflow in the office. But you realized the space was nearly empty, and everyone had left for lunch.
âAm I interrupting?â Jeonghan noticed immediately by your tone alone.
âNo. I just didnât look at the time,â you told him, pushing yourself off the chair and walking in the direction of the elevator.
âOh, I see. Is this still a good time to speak with you?â he asked.
You smirked at his choice of words. âI donât know, you tell me. Is this a good time for you?â you retorted, noticing that he was also in his cubicle.
âYou got me,â he said, and you could imagine the shy smile on his face. âIâm stepping outside, hold on.â
You pushed the button to the elevator and waited while on the other side of the line, you heard Jeonghan moving.
âOkay, Iâm out,â he said with a sigh. âAre you going to the food court?â he asked.
Jeonghan knew your schedule well, and he was also very familiar with your routine since you always kept him in the loop of the things you did. When you started dating, you would quite practically narrate to him your daily life through text messages, to the point that he knew all of your co-workers by name without knowing them in person.
âYes,â you replied, stepping out of the elevator.
âChicken salad?â he asked with a low tone, making you think that he probably had some co-worker passed him by.
âOh, I think Iâm moving on from that,â you told him. âI want a burrito. A chicken burrito.â
âOof, how different,â he teased.
âLet me be,â you bit back and then frowned, suspecting something was off.
âI will. But Iâm going to tease you about it either way,â he said with a brief laugh. âHow is work going?â
âFine,â you replied simply. But it was then that you dared to ask, âIs something going on, babe? Youâre never this weird.â
Jeonghan sighed, and you knew he was smiling. âAm I being that obvious?â he said, and then, before you could say something, he continued. âI just wanted to tell you to come tonight and have dinner with Sohee and me.â
âMmn, why do I feel like this couldâve been a text,â you said as you sat down at an empty table that was cluttered with a tray and a single French fry sitting on its box.
He laughed. âI am trying to get somewhere here,â he said.
âYouâre taking a lot of detours!â you laughed with him. âOf course, babe. You know I love having dinner with you and Sohee.â
âGood. Great,â he mumbled, and something about the dejected way his words came out made your ears perk.
A long moment of silence happened between you, where you could hear the sound of his breathing and nothing else. Your gaze fell out of focus, landing on a single grain of salt on the dirty table in the very crowded food court.
âIs everything alright, babe?â you asked, your tone lower. âDid the meeting go well?â
âYeah. Itâs not that. I wantââ he cut himself off, but then, âI want us to talk,â he said.
Your heart fell to your stomach, the feeling so impactful that it left you completely stunned. There was nothing in the world that could replace the feeling youâd get when you heard the words we need to talk, and all of its variations.
âOh, thenât-that changes things,â you mumbled awkwardly, not forgoing that he ignored your initial question.
âWait, no,â he started, noticing the tension in your words. âItâs nothing bad.â
âOkay,â you said under a heavy sigh. âThen tell me now,â you said.
âIâd rather wait until tonightââ
âDid I do something wrong?â you asked instead. And perhaps you couldâve controlled yourself better, but you were fully induced in anxiety now.
âNo. I swear itâs nothing bad,â he told you firmly. âItâs something I have been wanting to ask you.â
You started toying with the lonely grain of salt with the tip of your finger. âIf it really is nothing bad, then you could ask me now,â you said, fully aware of how shaky your tone was.
âAre you sure?â he asked slowly, stretching out each word.
âVery.â
Jeonghan sighed and then paused. You could picture him clearlyâstanding on the balcony of the building where he worked, looking very polished on the outside but probably tense, judging by his tone alone.
âI was just thinking that weâre always so busy, you with work and me withâwell, with everything andâŠâ You heard him pause, and then release a sigh, and thatâs how you knew he was also steadying himself. âI wanted to know if you would like to move in with us. With Sohee and me.â
In all of the things you couldâve possibly imagined him saying, this wasnât one of them. You straightened in your seat as a chill ran down your spine. âJeonghan, are you serious?â you asked, unable to control how firm you sounded.
âI donât mean now, but sometime in the future. We can plan and see how things go from there,â he offered, and he sounded steady, but you could notice the slight edge of nervousness in it.
The feeling invading your body made you feel as if you had been dropped from a very tall building.
âBabeâŠâ you started, looking for the words to say.
âItâs okay if you want to say no,â he said. âI just wanted to talk about it with you tonight over dinner.â
You closed your eyes, swallowing hard. âIâm not saying no,â you told him.
âYouâre not saying yes either,â he sighed in defeat. âIâm rushing into things.â
Your chest caved in. You wanted to say yes, you wanted this. But there were so many things that you thought needed to happen before you moved in with him and his daughter. In your book, things like the first I love you had to happen before sharing a roof with that person. Or at least knowing them for a full year.
Oh, and the judgment. Your friends already thought you were insane for dating a single parent, and now you were moving in with him eight months after meeting him? Not only that, your whole life had taken a turn when you started dating Jeonghanâto the point that the person you were a year ago wouldnât recognize the person you were now.
âCan we talk about it tonight over dinner?â you asked, your tone tiny.
âOf course. We can talk about it more calmly,â he said, and you couldnât ignore the note of sadness in his words. âI get it, baby. I shouldâve waited. Iâm sorry.â
âNo, Jeonghan. You did nothing wrong,â you said, but then something felt off.
âListen, I have to go back. See you tonight?â he asked, and you caught the way his tone picked up. Something had come up.
You deflated completely. âSee you tonight, Jeonghan.â
And then something hung in the air. An unspoken thing between you, something that needed to be said.
Your heart started to hope.
But then the line went dead.
There was a thought that you couldnât quite keep away. When you met Jeonghan, you instantly knew this man was for youâevery bone, every nerve ending in your body told you that. Then, when you knew he was a single father, you knew that a relationship with him would be challenging. But it turned out to be easier than expected.
However, things started to shift from the first night you and he took things to the next level. Spending the night in his bed was a very conscious decision you both made. You were both ready, and truth be told, aching for each other. What you didnât foresee was that you were climbing those steps into a serious relationship without paying attention to how fast and how uncontrolled you were.
Now, it felt as though you were in too deep, but there were no rules or boundaries in place.
You gnawed on your lower lip, debating whether to write him a text telling him that you knew he meant well by his proposition.
Instead, you got up and went to the nearest convenience store, got a sandwich, and ate half of it on the elevator ride back to your office.
The rest of your shift happened in a blink. Thankfully, you were so busy that the aftermath of that call with Jeonghan was pushed to the second plane of your brain. You would sometimes remember it with a jolt in your stomach. And he also didnât text you afterwards, which meant that he was also probably busyâor thatâs what you wanted to believe anyway.
You came out of the office some four hours after the phone call, scrambling inside your handbag to get your car keys.
Your phone started vibrating furiously somewhere in one of the many pockets, your heart deflating stressfully in the thought that it could possibly be Jeonghan. A flashing thought drove that anxiousness right into your soul, telling you that he would be telling you that tonightâs plans were off.
But it was an unknown caller. And you picked up solely on the thought that it would be a work-related thing.
âYes?â you said, putting your bag on top of the trunk of your car.
The caller was a woman with a very polite tone, asking for you using your full name.
âThis is her,â you replied almost routinely.
âHi! This is Katy from the Speech and Learning Center. Am I speaking to Soheeâs mother?â
âOhââ you gasped, leaving the task of finding your keys completely abandoned due to the sheer shock that question gave you. âNo. Iâm her fatherâs partner. Is something wrong?â
âOh, no. Everything is fine. Iâm so sorry, maâam,â Katy responded kindly. âWe have you on Soheeâs file as the emergency contact in case her father doesnât answer, and weâve tried him three times just now, but no answer. Are you able to make choices about her appointments with us?â
âGod,â you mouthed to yourself, screwing your eyes shut. âUm, Soheeâs birthday is on Friday, so Thursday would probably be better,â you responded automatically, and then you stopped yourself with a shake. âBut I think you should try her father again.â
But then you rememberedâJeonghan had mentioned a very important meeting, the one where his boss would determine whether he had the promotion or not.
âI believe he was in a meeting. Maybe you should try inâŠâ you checked your watch. âTwenty minutes. He should be off by then.â
âUnderstood. I will call him instead. Well, I thank you for picking up this call and wish you a good rest of your day. Bye!â
âThanks. You too,â you replied shakily.
And then she hung up.
The drive to Jeonghanâs apartment felt like an out-of-body experience. You felt yourself driving, but at the same time, your mind was somewhere else. After being hit with two reality checks, one after another, you were reconsidering what to do, what to say to Jeonghan once you saw him.
He had assigned you as Soheeâs emergency contact. Not her grandmother, not her aunt. And certainly not her mother. You.
It shouldnât be a big dealâmaybe you were making it into a big deal. But after Jeonghan had told you he wanted you to move in with him and his daughter, this just felt like too much.
You turned the doorknob of his apartment door as you released a shaky sigh, trying to drive out all your nervousness. But as you entered and laid eyes on him, you knew it would be impossible not to be nervous for the remainder of the night.
Jeonghan was sitting on the couch, baby Sohee sitting safely on his thigh as he held a triceratops in one hand, making it clash gently against Soheeâs brontosaurus. His gaze immediately switched to the door as you crossed it. Then tension set in, making the features of his face harden.
And you probably were mirroring that same expression. You closed the door behind you quietly and removed your shoes by the entrance.
Jeonghan placed Sohee on the couch carefully as you walked to the living room, feeling strange.
âHey,â he said, reading your face with his eyes.
Your heart was racing incredibly fast. âHi,â you replied.
âI got it,â he said with a big sigh.
Understanding dawned on you with a blink. âYou got promoted?â
He nodded, but his expression was still blank.
âOh my god!â you gasped, thinking that the tension in his demeanor was due to the call from earlier. âCongratulations!â you said excitedly, going for a hug.
Jeonghan didnât appear to be happy, not precisely. But he wrapped your torso in his arms, hugging you tightly. âThank you, baby,â he sighed, sinking his face into the crook of your neck.
Then you felt a pair of tiny hands palming your leg intuitively. You pulled away from Jeonghanâs arms, looking down to spot Sohee trying to get your attention.
âI think sheâs feeling left out,â Jeonghan interpreted keenly.
âOh, my bad,â you giggled and bent down to hug her. âCome here, princess,â you spoke softly to her as you lifted her in your arms.
âLook,â Sohee said quietly, showing you a new dinosaur toy.
âWow, what is this?â you asked her, your tone turning into honey.
âSaurus,â she mumbled shyly, still showing you her dinosaur figurine.
âA stegosaurus,â Jeonghan informed you quietly as he watched you carry Sohee in your arms. And there was that look again. The one you had seen in the morning. He was watching intently, calmlyâlike he wanted to remember this moment forever without missing a thing.
âThis is so cool,â you told her, still using that tone. âIs this the one you liked the most?â you asked her.
She listened to you intently, but her gaze was fixed on her figurine. She shook her head.
âShow her your favorite one, sweetheart,â Jeonghan said as you placed her back on the floor.
She ran back to the couch, grabbed the forgotten dinosaur and brought it back to you. You crouched to be at eye level with her as she showed you a new Triceratops.
âDid you just get these?â you asked her sweetly, your tummy twisting in cuteness aggression as she just nodded, ruffling her black hair.
âIt was one of her birthday gifts. I thought that it would be safe to keep them stashed in my closet, but I guess that I shouldâve known better,â he said guiltily, crouching with you as Sohee went on to show you her new collection of dinosaur toys.
âYouâre a very observant girl, arenât you?â you asked her, to which she ignored completely.
You could feel Jeonghan beside you, his gaze set on you as you continued your silent exchange with Sohee. After some seconds of feeling the weight of his gaze on you, you glanced to his direction.
âCan we talk?â he whispered as soon as he caught your eye.
You nodded, tummy twisting uneasily.
Jeonghan opened and then closed the fridge in one short motion. He placed his empty hands on his hips as he released a sigh. You noticed then that he was anxious. âSoheeâs mother is coming to town.â
You froze in place.
Of course. You shouldâve expected her to be for her daughterâs birthday. But part of you was also completely vexed about this piece of informationâsince you had believed for a moment that Jeonghan wanted to talk about the proposal heâd made earlier. But Soheeâs mother rarely called, to the point that in the eight months youâve been dating Jeonghan, you had never even seen her in person.
âOh, I see,â you said, swallowing hard. And then you added quite awkwardly: âIs she⊠did you⊠Did she call to see what you would do for Soheeâs birthday?â
Jeonghan understood where your curiosity came from. But he was still looking at you wearily, just like all the times he talked to you about a difficult thing in his life. Like the time he told you about his daughter, or the time he told you about Soheeâs absent mother.
It made your stomach churn.
And you knew what it was. It was selfishness.
âNo. I called her,â he said. You knew that he was telling you the truth, and in doing so, he was nervous. âSoheeâs birthday is one of the few times I can get her mother to come see her, soâŠâ
âI understand,â you said, resuming to set the table with the tablecloth and the dishware. âDo you⊠want me here that day?â
âOf course I do,â he said. You glanced his way, seeing his worried faceâhis eyebrows knitting softly. âDo you want to be here?â
âAs long as you are comfortable with it, yes,â you said, and then added: âI just donât want to complicate things.â
Jeonghan rolled his eyes. âBelieve me, things canât get more complicated with her. Soomin is justâŠâ he shook his head lightly. âWell, youâll see.â
You exhaled sharply. âOkay⊠no pressure,â you mumbled.
All you knew about Soomin was that she was not present in Sohee and Jeonghanâs lives from the moment Sohee turned eight months old. Her reason for parting and leaving everything behind was simplyâI donât want this lifeâand one day she packed her bags and left. Some months later, Jeonghan asked her for full custody of the baby, receiving it without any fight from her.
âIs she coming the day of?â you asked.
âOn Thursday afternoon, after Soheeâs therapy,â he said. And then you noticed that the anxiety hadnât quite brushed off. âI want you to meet her that day. That way we can have the party without any issues, if any.â
You raised your eyebrows, watching him from the other side of the table. âThat bad?â
He nodded silently, throwing a look to the living room, where Sohee was dancing around to the music playing on the TV screen. âI just donât want her to make a scene on Soheeâs birthday, you know? Itâs supposed to be her day.â
The tension in your shoulders dissolved when you turned over your shoulder and saw baby Sohee bending her knees to the rhythm of the music, her tiny hands planted on the sofa to keep herself steady as she danced happily. Your stomach twisted with the realization that you loved Sohee in a way that you wanted to protect her, care for her.
You had gotten irrevocably attached.
You took a deep breath, slowly turning to see Jeonghan. âDonât worry, babe,â you told him, smiling at him as you approached him again. âWeâll make Soheeâs day just about her, alright?â you said, pushing yourself to your tiptoes to kiss his cheek.
Jeonghan smiled softly. âAlright,â he said.
You stared at that smile on his face for one long second, and slowly, the memory of the phone call from earlier came back to your mind. Your heart faltered. You carefully thought of how to open the conversation, but nerves got the better of you firstâ âAbout earlierâŠâ you said in a whisper, pausing to clear your throat. âWere you serious? About me moving in?â
Jeonghan inhaled slowly, blinking away from your face briefly, glancing to where his daughter was in the living room. âWe donât have to rush,â he said, licking his lips before turning his gaze back to you. âItâs a big step, but it makes sense, right? I mean, youâre already here all the timeâŠâ
You studied him for a brief moment. You were hearing him, but all you could think about was the way his shoulders were tight, the way he was gripping the back of the chair with one hand. And more than everything elseâthe way he wasnât meeting your eyes.
âIt feels fast, Jeonghan,â you said carefully.
âIt feels right,â he countered, taking one step towards you. His face had changed now that you could see him with more closenessâhis dark eyes were full of certainty, full of tenderness. âI want you here. With us. Youâre already here all the time, you do morning routines with us, put her in bed, and drop-offsâŠâ
Your chest tightened. Something felt off. And then by pure instinct, you glanced at Sohee. The baby had stopped moving, her gaze fixed on the flat screen mounted on the wall, sticking her index finger in her mouth quite aloofly.
But the sight of her made your tummy twist even harder. It was the realization hitting you like a train. If you lost thisâif Jeonghan and you ever get to a point where you split, you would lose Sohee as well. The mere thought threatened to break your heart.
His gaze shiftedâand without following it, you knew that he was looking at Sohee. âIâm just⊠scared of doing this wrong way, you know?â
You reached for his face, cupping it with your hands to draw his gaze back to you again. âThen we should slow down,â you said, your heart protesting against your words with a stabbing pain. âJust a little.â
He swallowed hard. âOkay,â he breathed.
âYeah?â you replied in kind. âWe slow down for just a little while. We could talk about it again when the timing feels right.â
Jeonghan grabbed one of your wrists, squeezing it gently. He looked relieved, so much so that the next sigh he let out was slow as he leaned his forehead on yours. âIâm sorry. The last thing I want is to rush you,â he whispered.
âItâs okay,â you replied, despite your heart deflating a little. âI understand. Just know that Iâm not saying no. Okay?â you said, raising your tone just a little bit higher, trying to swallow your nerves.
âOkay,â Jeonghan replied with a breathy giggle, hearing your nervous tone.
You felt his lips grazing yours before he kissed you fully. It was then that you felt those three littlewords sitting on the tip of your tongue. You were falling for him, fast and uncontrollably. But instead of telling him that, you pushed your lips against his, kissing him fervently.
But then a sharp, and very high-pitched laugh pulled you both apart. Baby Sohee was laughing at something happening on the TV. You broke away and stepped back from Jeonghan.
âIâll⊠bring her to her chair so she can have dinner,â Jeonghan said. And by the look in his eyes, you knew that there was something else on his mind.
You let out a tired breath. âWhat a Monday,â you sighed.
âWelcome to my life,â Jeonghan replied. Â
After dinner, Jeonghan started to ready Sohee for bed, and that usually involved a bath, brushing teeth and then bed. It took him around thirty or forty minutes. And in that time, you usually took it upon yourself to tidy the space up. Initially, you had started doing it to kill the time while waiting for Jeonghan to come backâdespite his insistence for you not to do itâbut lately, it felt like it was part of your routine too.
You had put all of Soheeâs toys in the basket, folded the blankets and were now doing the dishes. The task had fallen into a steady rhythm, and so you were deeply focused on washing a pan when a pair of arms snaked around your waist, startling you.
âStay the night,â Jeonghan said, his tone low as he bent his head to rest it on your shoulder.Â
Your tummy twisted.
Ever since you slept with Jeonghan for the first time, you had fallen into a pattern of addiction. You would stay over at every chance you could get, which, granted, werenât as many since you had a very hectic work schedule as a CEO Assistant and he as a single parent, and now newly ascended to Director. But even as you had finally stepped to that level of intimacy, it was life that constantly would get in the way. It wasnât as easy to find a time for you to come to his apartment, and it would be nearly impossible for Jeonghan to spend the night at yours.
You felt his lips grazing a particular tender spot on the crook of your neck. âHannie,â you sighed, recoiling from his sweet kisses.
âWhat?â he mumbled against your skin, you could tell from his tone that he was smiling. But he didnât stop kissing your neck slowly.
You swore you could melt. When you took too long to respond, he giggled gently against your skin.
âWant me to stop?â
You had already scrubbed every inch of the pan you were holding under the stream of water; the task had been long forgotten. âNo, I want you to let me finish doing the dishes,â you replied with a playful tone.
âAlright, my bad,â he said, stepping back from you and starting to put things away in the kitchen.
You watched him through the corner of your eye as he roamed all over the space. Feeling the absence of his touch on your skin made you swallow hard. âI didnât say you had to stop,â you mumbled, feeling hot on the cheeks.
Jeonghan huffed, clearly still amused. âBaby, weâve been going like this for weeks,â he said pointedly, then chuckled as he threw a look at your face, finding your pout.
Since the night when you slept with Jeonghan for the first time, you have had very few occasions of true intimacy. However, that didnât stop Jeonghan from teasing you, touching you in places he hadnât dared before that night, but now he did it at every chance he could get when no one else was looking.
It got you nervous. You liked him too much. Every time he touched you intimately, your mind would be thrown back to those nights where it was just you and Jeonghan. It made your blood dance, heating your entire body.
Only Jeonghan had that power.
You placed the last item on the drying rack and grabbed the hand towel, drying your hands before returning it to its place. âFine, Iâm done doing the dishes,â you said, putting your hands on your hips. âWhere were we?â
Jeonghan let out a teasing huff. âYouâre cute,â he said with a chuckle.
âYouâre a tease,â you bit back, trying to sound as annoyed as you could, but instead your tone denoted how flustered you already were.
Jeonghan rolled his eyes at you, the smirk not washing off his face. âSo? Are you staying or not?â he asked, his tone still playful.
âOnly if you behave,â you said impishly.
Jeonghan raised his eyebrows, stepping closer to you. âMe?â he asked, his tone rising. He was close enough now that all he had to do was lift his hand to cup your face, fixing your gaze on him. âAll I do is what you tell me, baby,â he said, his tone so low and raspy it was almost like a purr.
âSo whenever you misbehave, is it because I told you to?â you huffed, not caring that his face was closer to yours now.
He smirked slowly as his eyes outlined your face. âObviously,â he shrugged lightly. He finally closed the space between your lips and his, kissing you tenderly. âI always behave. While you, on the other handâŠâ
He didnât finish his sentence, his gaze dipping to look at your lips briefly before he kissed you again. You smiled into the kiss, despite it being chaste in the way that he was only pressing his lips to yours repeatedly, creating soft, wet noises that only incited you to get more.
âBabe,â you muttered, laughing sweetly. âKiss me properly,â you told him.
Jeonghan didnât waste a second. Repositioning his hands around your face, he only leaned in, locking his lips with yours. His kiss was soft, but slow, wet, and so full of heat. You closed your eyes and let him dominate the kiss, parting your mouth when you felt the tip of his tongue swipe your bottom lip, and then you felt his tongue against yours.
Your legs tensed as an automatic response, a shot of arousal coursing through you like lightning. His hands switched from cupping your cheeks to the back of your head, his fingers tangling in your hair. That made a silent moan bubble in your mouth, so you grabbed him by the belt in his jeans, pulling him closer to you.
Jeonghan grunted in your mouth and then pushed you to the kitchen counter by simply taking two steps forward, making you take two steps back. His lips took yours with more vehemency now, kissing you deeply, with a very unique urgency. It made you lose control, it made you feel hot all over.
So you pulled back, but not far. âLetâs go to bed, yeah?â you said breathily, running a hand over his clothed chest.
Jeonghan smiled, making you think that heâd say something about your nervousness again. But he grabbed your hand, âAlright,â he said, and then he pulled you in the direction of his bedroom.
Whenever you stayed the night, you would wear Jeonghanâs clothesâmostly oversized t-shirts and sometimes sporty shorts. So much so that youâd noticed Jeonghan kept the clothes heâd lent you in a particular spot in his closet, making you suspect that he probably had stopped wearing them, only to keep them clean in case you came to stay the night.
Your gut twisted when Jeonghan pulled the same oversized t-shirt and handed it to you. âYou know, you could bring some stuff in. Iâll empty a drawer for you,â he mumbled, turning on the bedside lamp.
He always said something akin to those words whenever he had the opportunity. It reminded you of his other requestâof moving in. âYeah, Iâll bring some spare pyjamas,â you replied nervously, turning on your feet to start unbuttoning your shirt.
âAnd maybe clothes for work?â he asked, and you could hear the hint of hope in his tone.
You already had a toothbrush and makeup remover wipes that you once bought to keep in Jeonghanâs bathroom. That time youâd also felt you were stepping over a line, for some reason. But Jeonghan thought it was endearing that you had asked him for permission beforehand. You donât have to ask, he told you every time.
âYeah, that too,â you replied, sounding short of breath. When finished unbuttoning your shirt, you threw a look behind you, seeing that Jeonghan had just turned his gaze elsewhere in that instant. You smiled to yourself, noticing that he, too, was acting strange, fidgety.
Or perhaps it was just staying behind the line you always painted. That was another thing that drove you crazy about this manâhe always waited for your word. But he kept a keen eye on you, certainly making sure that you were not having trouble initiating. And this time was no different.
You liked Jeonghan. No, you loved him. And tonight, with all those questions roaming about in your mind, questions about moving in, taking care of Sohee, meeting her mother⊠You were simply too much in your head.
And Jeonghan knew.
After brushing your teeth and cleaning your makeup off, you slid into the bed beside him. He was eyeing you and the screen of his phone back and forth, waiting for you. âReady?â he asked.
Your stomach twisted again. âHuh?â
Jeonghan smiled at you. âTo sleep?â he added.
âAh. Yes. Oh, yeah,â you stuttered nervously, scooting closer to him.
Jeonghan left the phone on the bedside table and turned the lamp off. He turned around, draping an arm around your waist as you also turned, forming up a spooning situation where he was the bigger spoon. He kissed your shoulder over his clothes, and then your cheek.
âDid you have a good day at work?â he asked, his tone soft and low.
You blinked, turning slightly to look at him. âYeah. Why?â you asked.
He shrugged. âHopefully I didnât distract you too much with my stupid phone call,â he said.
Your heart softened. âIt was okay, babe. Today's work was nothing out of the ordinary,â you told him, and then showed him a playful smile. âAnd I love your phone calls.â
âNo matter how inopportune they are?â he asked, his tone waning ever so softly.
You nodded. âThey never are. Stupid or inopportune,â you replied, your tone waning too.
He paused, looking briefly at your lips before bringing a hand to pinch your chin softly. âWhere were you my whole life?â he asked.
Your heart could burst. You wanted to say a million things to him. You wanted to tell him how you fell in love with him at first glance, you wanted to tell him you loved him.
But you choked up. âI could say the same,â you whispered. And you werenât lyingâdespite having had other boyfriends in the past, you had never ever felt love like this in your life. It only made you think that Jeonghan hadnât either. And the thought broke your heart.
He smiled, moving his head so he could touch your forehead with his. âIâm never letting you go, you hear me?â he said.
You nodded. âNever.â Please.
You and Jeonghan fell asleep shortly after that, going back to your original spooning position. He wrapped an arm around you, and you snuggled close to him under the covers. Sleeping with him was extraordinarily goodâhe never moved, never snored, and you were careful not to disrupt his sleeping either.
Somewhere in the middle of the night, you felt him stir and slip out of bed. You became too conscious about it because the bed grew colder around you, and it was getting harder to go back to sleep.
You turned over, thinking that you mightâve done something to wake him up. But he was nowhere to be seen. âJeonghan?â you called.
He stepped into the bedroom, carefully leaving the door ajar. âDid I wake you?â he asked, his tone low.
You watched him as he came back to bed. âWhatâs wrong?â you asked instead.
He sucked in a breath when he felt your warm body, as though he had been exposed to a chill temperature. âSoheeâs mother called.â
âThis late?â you asked. âIs she okay?â
âYeah. Sheâs fine. I suppose she didnât look up what our time zone was before calling,â he explained calmly.
âWell, what did she have to say?â you asked, feeling sharply awake now.
He slipped his arms around your body, pulling you closer to him. His clothes were cold, as well as his skin. He was probably having the phone call outside on the balcony so as not to wake you or Sohee up. âA bunch of nothings. She cancelled Thursdayâs plan. Said sheâll be meeting us at the party.â
You couldnât help but feel relieved. âDid she say why?â
Jeonghan shrugged. âYeah. But it was all an excuse.â
Something inside you deflated with shame. Here you were, feeling relieved that you wouldnât meet Soomin a day sooner; meanwhile, that also meant that Sohee wouldnât see her mom either until the party. And Jeonghanâs lower tone reflected that pity.
âIâm sorry, babe,â you murmured.
âItâs fine. I had expected something like that,â he replied, but you could still hear the hurt in his tone. âShe promised sheâd be here for Soheeâs birthday. So, Iâll take whatever at this point.â
Now, you were even more reluctant to meet her. Your gut twisted, but before you could even process what type of feeling you were having, Jeonghan kissed your brow, easing the storm cooking up in your mind.
âShall we go back to sleep, beautiful?â he whispered, moving his lips to kiss your eyelid, then your cheekbone.
Jeonghan was so sweet, so loving, that it scrambled your brains to think how he was yours.
His lips reached your cheek, and you moved your face so that the next kiss landed on your lips. He planted a sweet kiss, but then you parted your mouth, trapping his bottom lip in. You kissed him deeply, trying to put all of your feelings into one single kiss.
You wanted to show him that you were madly in love with him without having to say the words. You kissed him with such force that had him moaning in your mouth. He said nothing, only letting you lead as you pushed him by the shoulders, wordlessly telling him to lie on his back.
He gave you one confused look that quickly evaporated once you straddled him. His hands snaked on your thighs as you bent forward, taking his face in your hands to kiss him, moaning on his lips once his fingertips grazed the lace hem of your panties. The sound only gave him the green light to continue, exploring your skin with the pads of his fingers as he hiked the t-shirt up your torso.
You pulled back, but only to let him take the t-shirt off, leaving you only in your panties, and your chest bare for his view. His gaze roamed all over your bare skin, but it was for just a moment. You leaned in again, his hands latching to your waist, while the other fisted your hair by the side of your head.
You shifted on your knees, grounding your hips down on himâbut just barely. Jeonghan was already hard, and you could feel him just by moving on top of him a little.
Dragging your fingernails down his chest, you crawled back to give yourself space to pull his shorts down. Your fingers hooked around the waistband of both his boxers and shorts, and you pulled, uncovering an inch of skin as one of your fingers traced a line over his thin but dark, happy trail.
Jeonghan sucked in a breathâbut this time it was because of something else. âSweetheart,â he mumbled, looking at your hands as you pulled his cock out, grabbing it with your other hand.
âMn?â You raised your gaze to him.
His hands slipped on your hips, clutching you gently as you lifted them to move your panty line aside. âCondom?â he mumbled, groaning and clenching his jaw as you guided the head of his cock down your folds.
You pretended not to hear, lowering your hips and slipping him inside your warm walls, all in one go. And fuck, he was perfectâhis cock was perfect too. The feeling of having him raw and stretching your pussy was the sweetest feeling youâve ever felt. Your mouth fell open, eyebrows drawn together as you started bouncing on him gently.
âFuck,â Jeonghan gasped, closing his eyes before sinking his head back on his pillow.
You anchored your hands on his chest, using him as support to roll your hips on top of him. And yet again, you wondered what the scene would look likeâmiddle of the night, his pants halfway pulled down, you bouncing on top of him with your panties still on and trying your best to be quiet.
But it was nearly impossible. Jeonghan moved his hands from your hips, palming your breasts and caressing your pebbled nipples with the pad of his thumbs. You clenched your teeth together, letting out a soft whine as you ground your hips on him, trying to take his cock deeper into you.
âQuiet, baby,â he said, smirking. But then he moved his hands, one to your hip, the other on your lower abdomen. He pushed your panties further aside, pressing your lower belly with his palm before starting to rub your clit with the pad of his thumb.
âFuckâDaddy,â you mewled, hips buckling on top of him.
âDo you like that?â he asked, his tone low. He glanced at your face once before his gaze dipped to your cunt, moaning at the sight of his cock disappearing inside you.
You nodded, picking up the pace of your hips. The pad of his thumb rubbed your clit steadily, not switching, unstopping. It was driving you closer to the edge with every second that passed, making your walls tighten around his girth.
âIs this what you wanted, baby? Daddyâs cock?â he asked with that lazy smile still on his face, his tone raw, but waning.
It drove you insaneâthe switch from being sweet and gentle to talking to you like that. âMm-mmph,â you admitted.
He tilted his head back slightly, teeth clenched tightly as he tried to exert some control on himself. But as you continued rolling your hips on top of him, you saw him starting to fall apartâhis eyes went white before he squeezed them shut. And then, he made a sound, a long, raspy moan that was stuck in his throat. âBaby, Iâm not going to last long,â he said.
It was your turn to smile now. âThatâs okay, Daddy,â you told him sweetly, and then you tilted your head, showing him a playful side. âI could slow down for you.â
Jeonghanâs eyes rolled to the back of his head. âI donât think thatâll make a difference,â he gritted, smiling despite himself.
His hands switched to your sides, lifting your hips with one powerful groan that rumbled in his chest. The sound made your pulse quicken, and your gaze immediately shot to the door, as though trying to fish for any kind of sounds coming from down the hall.
Jeonghan acted quicklyârolling your back onto the mattress effortlessly. A gasp spilled from your mouth, eyes locking with his as he slid your panties down your legs. And then he crawled between your thighs before taking his t-shirt off.
âWe should be quiet,â you told him, smiling shyly as he placed his palms on your knees, pushing your thighs up to your chest.
âLetâs see how long you can do that,â he replied, letting out a tired giggle.
And he had a point about that. Last time you and Jeonghan had sex, you had been so noisy that the downstairs neighbors made some tacit remarks about a creaky bedframe. So you watched as Jeonghan grabbed a pillow, probably thinking the same as you and placed it behind the headboard.
âCanât make any promises,â you mumbled, still looking as he pulled his shorts and boxers down, taking his hard cock in one hand and guiding it to your drenched pussy. You swallowed hard, holding your breath as the crown of his cock nuzzled against your entrance, and then he slipped inside you, so fucking slow.
You couldnât resist it. The sight of his length disappearing in your mound was alluring, and the feeling of him reaching so deep inside you was even more delicious than riding him. He pushed your thighs to the sides of your ribs by climbing on top of you, so he was now fully pressing your body with his.
Jeonghan smiled. âSee? Didnât last long,â he said, hearing your soft whines as he bottomed out inside you.
âFuckâdaddy,â you gritted, breathing hard under the weight of his body, but you loved it. âMove, please, move.â
You didnât need to begâhe did it right away, pulling back to push right in, creating a steady pace effortlessly. He framed your face with his forearms, his face so close to yours that he only leaned slightly to get a swift kiss. You cupped his head in your hands, lifting your head so you could kiss him deeper, earning a soft moan from him.
It was truly suffocating. The warmth of his body, being so close to him. Looking into his eyes as he claimed your body like it was his. It overwhelmed youâthe need to be his woman and have him like this every night, forever. You were going insane with the mere thoughtâwaves of love and lust coursed through you uncontrollably.
The room became flooded with the muffled sounds of pleasureâthe small whines you made, the short moans Jeonghan let out in between tired breaths, and the very obvious creaking of the bedframe despite the headboard having a pillow to not slam against the wall.
You loved it. Loved how you both had fallen into an addiction of silent quickies in the middle of the night, stifling moans and speaking filth in hushed tones. The sheer adrenaline of trying and failing to be quiet made you wet. You could even catch the slippery sound of your arousal as Jeonghan pushed his cock deep inside you.
âGod,â you gasped when he picked up a pace, fucking you faster, still massaging that glorious spot inside your walls.Â
And you let pleasure bloom inside your body with a hot, intense shiver. Long ago, it was so rare that youâd cum with penetration aloneâbut somehow Jeonghan always made you cum like that, effortlessly. Your mouth dropped open, almost tasting your orgasm on the tip of your tongue.
âYou close?â he asked with sharp, ragged breaths. He gave you a dazed look, outlining your features with his gaze. When you nodded, he gave you another light smile. âLet go, baby.â
You stared into his eyes, watched him as his jaw twitched when he ground his teeth downâyou noticed he was close too. âCum with me?â you asked, cheeks turning hot as you heard how fucking sweet you sounded.
Oh, you were in love. You had come to this realization a while ago, but now it was becoming more and more unbearable. Your mind spun with questionsâdid Jeonghan know? Could he see it in your eyes? Hear it in your tone? There you were, riddled with questions while you were begging for him to cum with you, and he wasnât wearing a condom.
âYouâre cumming first, Babygirl,â he replied, his tone waning.
You couldâve sworn that he had a way to hear your thoughts, but you didnât let that distract youâbecause you were instantly swept over by an intense wave of pleasure. A gasp tore from your chest, and before you could let out a scream, Jeonghan crushed his mouth against yours, drowning out your sounds of pleasure.
He continued thrusting in that same calculated pace until you became a puddle of pleasure. You were wet. Sweaty, hot, and quivering on his bedsheets. And he was kissing you softly, passionately, like he hadnât done before.
âFelt good?â he mumbled.
You nodded. âAmazing,â you drawled sweetly.
âGood,â he mouthed, the muscles of his face tightening, like he was in painâhe was close.
Your heart skipped a beat. âDonât pull out,â you said.
He blinked, his gaze finding you instantly. Â
âPlease,â you whispered, linking your wrists behind his nape, as though trying to hold him right there.
He blinked slowly and then let his forehead rest on top of yours. âFuck,â he sighed, pushing his hips against yours with tight, deep thrusts. You closed your eyes as another euphoric rush gripped your body wholly. âGodâfuck, baby,â Jeonghan drawled, letting out a raw, quiet moan as he gave you a final push, his cock twitching in your walls as he spilled himself deep inside you.
Jeonghan remained there, breathing fitfully, his body completely glued to yours as though unable to move. And then you wished youâd known what to say next. You wished you knew what to do or say after making love. So instead, you moved your face, finding his lips with your own. You kissed him slowly, trying to convey the quick rhythm of your heart, the butterflies swarming inside your chest.
He pressed his lips against the corner of yours, then he kissed your cheek. âYouâre okay?â he whispered, gently pushing the tip of your nose with his before pressing another kiss against your lips.
Your heart gave another leap. âYeah,â you mumbled shakily. âWe should probably get ready to sleep. You have work tomorrow.â
Jeonghan pulled back, blinking at you confusedly. âYeah. Sure,â he replied, his gaze outlining your features. âBut after Iâve taken care of you, baby.â
And when he peeled off your body, you knew you had made a mistake. You felt foolish then, because this man was clearly thrown off by the switch in your tone, confused by your evident refusal to talk about what was going on in your mind.
But he took care of you with the utmost gentleness, offering to start a shower for you, which you declined due to how late into the night it was. However, you cleaned up in the bathroom, and when you came out, he had a glass full of water ready on the bedside table, and heâd already changed the bedsheets.
âI put your clothes in the washing machine and programmed it for a quick start early in the morning,â he said thoughtfully as he unstuck the pillow behind the headboard. âThey should be clean and dry by the time we both get up.â
It made you smileâthe very careful manner in which he was fluffing the pillows as you approached the bed. âThank you, babe,â you replied, feeling your heart warm up.
âDonât thank me,â he whispered, lifting his head as you stood beside him before the bed. âHopefully you will remember to bring in some spare clothes next time?â he insisted, smiling shyly about something, and thenâ âSorry. I keep bringing it up.â
Your heart deflated. âDonât apologize,â you replied, placing your palm on his side, feeling the muscle of his abdomen contract at your touch. âIâll remember to bring some stuff in. I promise.â
âOkay,â he mumbled, grabbing your hand and taking it to his mouth, kissing your knuckles. âLetâs go to sleep.â
You nodded, climbing back on the bed and snuggling him close. Jeonghan wrapped your waist with one arm, the little crook beneath your earlobe.
Your heart fluttered. âDo we already have a cake?â you asked suddenly.
Jeonghan pulled back. âWhat?â he mumbled.
You turned slightly. âFor Soheeâs party. Did you order a cake?â
His brow creased. âYes. Why?â he asked curiously.
You turned again, face to your pillow. âItâs nothing. I can bake really good chocolate cakes,â you gave him a light shrug. âThought I could help with something.â
Jeonghan smiled; you felt the change in his breath on your neck, making you shiver. âIâll remember that,â he said, pressing his lips to the first spot of skin he could find. âFor her fourth birthday.â
The knot in your tummy twisted harder. âYeahâŠâ you trailed off, deciding to snuggle closer to him, silently telling him to hold you tighter to his body.
âSleep well, pretty,â he whispered, unaware of the shift happening in you.
Your head was about to blow up. You were sure. And every time you blew air out of your lungs, your abdomen screamed in pain and exhaustion.
âPerhaps Iâm not made for this,â you mumbled to yourself quietly, wrapping the bead around your fingers to secure a tight knot, and then proceeded to put tape on one side of it, sticking it to the wall.
You had successfully decorated the side of the dining room that had the most cleared space for it. There perched a big and colorful daisy of white and light blue petals, with a Happy B-day Sohee sign sitting in the centre in baby pink colors, made by your hand. You had pulled out your party decorating skills, which you had put away since entering college, but they came in handy the moment you realized Jeonghan wasnât planning on decorating.
âOkay,â you sighed tiredly, looking at the wall. Now that you had one task done, you needed to tend to the other two tasks you had set for yourself.
Task number one was decorating, done. Task number two was tidying up the place for the guests. And task number three was psyching yourself up for meeting your boyfriendâs ex, and the mother of his daughter.
Your stomach did that thing againâit felt like some deep part of you protested against what you had ahead for you, and it wanted to draw your attention to it by stabbing you right in the gut.
But you went ahead and tidied the place upâputting toys where they belonged, folding blankets and taking them to the bedrooms, cleaning the kitchen counters, and setting the table just nicely.
Two hours had passed since youâd arrived at Jeonghanâs place, and all of your tasks were done. You realized you could sneak fifteen minutes of mirror talk and touching up your makeup before Jeonghan and Sohee arrived back home.
When you came out of the bathroom, you felt like something was shaking inside your veins, leaving a trail of prickled nerves in its wake. But you took a deep breathâcatching the sweet smell of vanilla, sugar, and cinnamon from the birthday cake set in the centre of the round dining table. You outlined the entire space with your gaze, mentally checking every single item you told Jeonghan you were in charge of getting for the party.
Balloons. Fruit tray. Candy tray. Banana milk. Peach drinks (Soheeâs favorite), candles and goodie bags, which were dinosaur themed.
The smart lock of the main door clicked and beeped, making your stomach contract and your nerves fire up in different directions inside your limbs. Jeonghan was crossing the door carrying a backpack on one shoulder, gift bags hanging on the same arm he was carrying Sohee with.
âHello, you two,â you chirped, anxiety instantly swept when you saw Soheeâs adorable face. âWhat took you so long?â
âSoheeâs teachers,â Jeonghan exhaled tiredly, closing the door behind him and watching you approach him and Sohee. âThey had a lot to say to me. One of them even got emotional.â
âAnd what did they have to say?â you asked, eyes set on the little girl perched on her fatherâs arm.
âOh, just how much they appreciate Sohee,â he replied, bumping his daughter on his arm and turning to her. âThey said you were the best girl, right? The smartest, kindest and friendliest. Sheâs been pretty talkative at school,â he added at the end, giving you a meaningful glance.
You made a shocked expression. âIs that true?â you asked, and then giggled at the sound of your own voice.
Sohee was listening to the conversation while she chewed on the tip of her index finger. But she nodded intently.
âThey gave her a couple of presents,â Jeonghan said, gesturing to the gift bags on his arm. âSome of them were from her friends, two of them were from her teachers.â
You took one glance at the gift bags. âOh, shoot,â you muttered.
âWhat?â Jeonghan said, brow furrowing.
âI forgot the present I got for her back in my apartment,â you said dispiritedly. But you turned to Sohee, extending your hands at her. âHi, sweetheart!â
Sohee inclined her little body forward, just as you grabbed her by the torso and wrapped her around your hip. The movement was so natural that it went almost unnoticed, but it was Jeonghanâs gaze, the way he blinked, and his eyes lit up as he looked at his daughter, pointing at the wall behind you.
âThatâs okay, we can go get it tomorrow morning,â Jeonghan mumbled faintly, still looking at his daughter perched now on your hip.
âMn,â Sohee hummed softly, kicking her legs up in the air and pointing at the wall slightly harder.
âOh, right,â you turned on your feet, taking the baby girl to the living room area so she could see the wall decorations. âWe made this for you, kiddo,â you chirped, looking at her pretty face.
She pointed again.
âDâyou like it?â you whispered, heart warming up at the sight of her sweet brown eyes taking in the big daisy on the wall.
She nodded aloofly. And then kicked her legs, pointing them to the floor.
âAlrighty,â you mumbled, carefully setting her on the floor. You watched her run joyfully to her bedroom, perhaps to get something, a toy for her to show you.
But then you turned, catching Jeonghan still staring at you, hands deep in his pockets, head tilted to one side. But it was the tenderness in his eyes that made your heart flip in that same rhythm as beforeâthe one you had been so keen on avoiding, but was becoming unbearable.
âDo you like it?â you parroted, showing him the wall with your hands. You exhaled, trying to calm your nerves downâbut it was futile.
âI love it,â he replied with a warm tone coating his words. Then he approached you with a slow step, slipping a hand on your waist to pull you closer to his frame. He leaned his head forward, planting a sweet kiss on your forehead. âI donât know what Iâd do without you.â
A vehement shudder crossed your entire body, and you let your eyelids fall closed as he planted another kiss on your forehead, this time longer. The words he said were ones you knew your heart was aching to hearâbut the noise inside your head didnât let you form a response.
The doorbell rang loudly, making you cringe visibly and turn to the door. âIâll get it,â you said, slipping out of his embrace.
âNo, Iâll get it,â Jeonghan said kindly.
âThen Iâll go get the birthday girl,â you said, forcing a smile that didnât feel too stiff on your faceâbut your heart was going a thousand miles per second.
Jeonghan caught something in your face, his eyes outlining your features before you turned around and hurried down the hall and to the toddlerâs bedroom.
Sohee was playing with the new dinosaurs that her father had gotten for her birthday. She already got them all lined up on the colorful bookshelf in one corner of the room. Your stomach twisted with cuteness overload when you heard the tiny noises she was making for a triceratops as she made it stomp across the shelf.
âHey kiddo,â you cooed, approaching her and crouching behind her. âYour friends are here. Do you want to come with me and greet them?â
She turned around and directed a steady look at your face. âYeap,â she nodded happily, taking another dinosaur in her fist and running out of the room, squealing like she knew she was the star of the day.
You rose, and with a big sigh, you followed the toddler down to the dining room. You greeted the guests, parents of Soheeâs friends from daycare. And before you knew it, the party had already started, and it was going smoothly.
You made light conversation as you got juice boxes for all the kids, who werenât many, but they felt like a massive multitude when they were swarming around you trying to get juice boxes and goodie bags.
âAlright, alright!â you laughed, holding up both hands. âEveryone will get one, I promise!â you said while handing a goodie bag to each kid.
You felt a hand on the small of your back. âThat includes me?â Jeonghan asked close to your ear before planting a kiss on your cheek.
You leaned into the kiss. âIf you behave, Iâll consider it,â you replied warmly.
âMmn,â he hummed, pressing another loving kiss. âYou know youâre all I want.âÂ
Your heart stammered, making you blink and find his eyes. Your tongue twisted, and you wished you had been quick enough to quip back something as enticingâbut it was already too late. The doorbell rang again, but this time, neither you nor Jeonghan had to go get it.
It was Soheeâs mother, Soomin. She had only rung the doorbell to announce her arrival, since she knew the combination to the smart lockâa thing you had thought only you and Jeonghan knew, but you were proven wrong.
The person who crossed the door was entirely not what you had imagined. In all the scenarios where you had pictured yourself meeting Jeonghanâs ex and the mother of his child, youâd never imagined that it would be like this.
Soomin was beautiful. She was tall and had a bright smile as she crossed the door. âWhereâs my girl?â she shouted from across the apartment, and your poor heart fell to your stomach when you saw Jeonghan smile widely.
âOh, thank god,â he mumbled beside you. He ran quickly to his daughter, snatching her from the floor and making her squeal with the abrupt movement. Sohee laughed, drawing the attention of the room as Jeonghan carried her to see her mother. âSohee baby, momâs here!â
âHi, peanut,â Soomin said in a high-pitched tone. âHappy birthday, sweetheart! Mommy is here,â she said, and then she leaned towards Sohee, who was sitting in Jeonghanâs arms.
But Sohee recoiled, turning her back to her mother. It was only natural, you thought, since the child barely recognized the face in front of her. But the scene before you hurt to watch either way. Jeonghan bounced the toddler in his arms, trying to drag her attention back to Soomin, who was getting something out of her leather handbag.
âLook what mommy got for you!â Soomin said, still speaking in that faux sweet tone. âLook!â
Sohee turned to see her mother getting a red gift bag, small enough that it fit inside the slick black leather bag. Sohee stared at it for a hard second before extending her hand and grabbing it, and then she proceeded to kick her legs to the floor.
âAlright,â Jeonghan said, putting the toddler back on the floor.
Sohee ran freely, and back to her little friends. Your gaze followed back to Jeonghan, who greeted Soomin with a very dry hey, but then approached to give her a quick hug, devoid of all kinds of affection. It was almost like neither of them knew how to treat each other anymore.
âWow, you really went out this time,â Soomin said, looking at the decorations, the birthday cake carefully set in the centre of the table, birthday plates piled up, and trays of fruit and candy already about to empty.
âOh, it was all her,â Jeonghan said, extending an arm towards you almost ceremoniously.
Your heart warmed up at the gesture, but your nerves had eaten you up already. You approached them with a stiff step until Jeonghan wrapped his arm around your waist to pull you up to his side, showing you off proudly.
âSo I can put a face to the name, finally,â Soomin said, showing you a dashing smile. She extended a hand towards you. âIâm Soomin, Soheeâs mother.â
You took her hand. âPleasure to meet you,â you said, smiling at her politely.
At that exact second, one of the little kids had pulled one of the candy trays from the table and thrown the candy all over the floor. âOhââ you uttered, motioning to go clean the candy from the floor.
âIâll get it,â Jeonghan said, giving you a quick but reassuring look. And then he said to you, âIâll be back, baby.â
And you knew he didnât want to leave you alone with his ex, but he also didnât want you to go and clean up the floor. So you stood there, anxiously watching as Jeonghan picked the candies and put them back on the tray one by one.
âCan I help with anything?â Soomin asked, more for decency than true intentions of helping.
âNope,â you said awkwardly. âEverythingâs set up.â
Soomin leaned her head to one side slightly before throwing one glance to the kids playing with Sohee. âYouâve done a lot already.â
âItâs not that big of a party,â you said, shrugging.
She smiled faintly, and you knew what she was looking at. âItâs big enough,â she said faintly.
You followed her gaze, finding Sohee playing with one of her little friends. They were both sharing a soundboard that someone at the party had gifted her.
âSheâs shy, isnât she?â Soomin said, her tone was devoid of snark, but then she added, âKind of like her father.â
Although the comment wasnât ill-natured, it hurt your heart to hear it. âShe just takes a minute,â you replied, wishing you hadnât sounded so harsh towards Soomin. But your heart was beating frantically, making you afraid that it was going to jump out of your chest.
And then you watched as Soominâs gaze went around the room again, stopping on the wall behind you. Her dark brown eyes went over the balloons forming a giant daisy, and the big birthday sign made by you.
âYouâre really good with her,â Soomin said after a moment. Her eyes found you. âJeonghan has told me about you.â
Your tummy clenched. âI care about her.â
âI can tell,â she replied, and then you caught an edge in her tone. And then added, softer, âNot everyone would step into something like this.â
You frowned. âLike what?â
Soomin raised her eyebrows, gesturing around the apartment, the toddlers. âWell, a life thatâs already in progress, you know what I mean?â
You told yourself that the words were neutral. Nothing was targeted towards you. But it still felt like it was.
You forced a smile. âI didnât see it that way.â
Soominâs expression didnât change; it was as though she were having a great time talking with you. âThatâs probably why youâve made it work. It was really brave of you to have stepped in. To do what I couldnât.â
Your stomach clenched again, and your mouth twitched like you were about to tell her something youâd regret.
âBaby! Where are the candles?â Jeonghan called from the kitchen.
You exhaled, glad. âExcuse me,â you said, and as you walked away, you felt Soominâs gaze on you, following you.
Your ears were ringing, anger still boiling inside you. Jeonghan was closing a drawer, his expression hardening at once as he took one look at you. âEverything okay there, beautiful?â he asked, glancing towards the living room.
You could still feel Soominâs eyes on you. You nodded. âYeah, everythingâs fine,â you said, trying to mask your anger. You would talk about it with him later.
His eyes outlined your expression. âSure?âÂ
âSure,â you said, opening the top cabinet and then handing him the pack with green and pink candles in it.
Jeonghan grabbed the candles, sighing. âLooks like the party is going well,â he said, giving you a hopeful smile and glimmering eyes.
Despite the rage still tightening your stomach, you smiled at him. âSoheeâs happy,â you said, casting a look at Sohee. âIâll go get her,â you told him, turning around and walking towards Sohee.
The toddler was happily focused on her toys and her little friends. Her eyes were wide and glimmering in excitement, and candy wrappers were spread all across the floor. Something caught your eyeâa red, unopened gift bag, forgotten in one corner of the living room.
âPrincess, come here,â you called softly, crouching behind her to see her at eye level. âDo you want cake?â
The question caught her attention immediately, making her turn around and face you. You stretched your hands to her, and she silently responded by stretching her little arms to you. You grabbed her, standing up to secure her at your hip, and she instantly wrapped her legs around you.
âOh, I got her. Let me.â
Soomin was already behind you, showing you her palms so you could transfer Sohee to her grip. A pang of jealousy sank deep inside your belly, making you want to hold Sohee closer to your body, almost like a protective defence mechanism.
You conceded, though begrudgingly. âOf course,â you replied, but there was no way you could hide the disappointment in your tone.
With a fretful pain lacing your heart, you handed Sohee over to her mother. The toddler kicked her legs anxiously and turned to look at you as though trying to understand she wasnât in your arms anymore. And with little control over yourself, you glanced in Jeonghanâs direction, almost as knowing heâd be looking. He had watched the whole exchange from afar, and he immediately recognized the dispirited look on your face, because all he did was offer you a solemn smile.
It made your blood boil. What else could he do? A tiny voice called inside your head. Youâre not Soheeâs mother. The voice said with painful regret.
It was the truth. No matter how bad it hurt, you werenât Soheeâs mother. And you were getting attached to herâattached to this life without having a true anchor to it.
And the thought ruined the rest of the night for you.
So you watched as Soomin sat on the table with Sohee sitting on her lap, the toddler forgot about the anxiety of being with a stranger as soon as Jeonghan stepped beside the chair and lit up the candles on the cake.
You debated whether to step closer or just watch from afar. The candles you had picked for Soheeâs cake were green and pink, and a single sparkling candle that, once Jeonghan got to light it up, stole the attention of the toddler. Her big, brown eyes glimmered in the dark against the sparkles that flew up to the ceiling, and instead of gasping or crying out as the other kids did, Sohee just stared at it, fascination spread across her face, parting her little lips.
Your stomach twisted in adoration. And you couldnât resist it. You pulled out your phone and hit the record button, determined to save this little moment foreverâeven if in real life it only lasted about fifty seconds.
Sohee was happy. She ate cake happily, shared her toys with her friends and seemed to be getting better at talking with others. And that was the only shining light in your night.
By the time that all the guests had left, the apartment didnât look as wrecked as you half expected it to be after hosting about fifteen people in it. The paper plates were stacked in a crooked tower, forks and spoons piled next to it on the kitchen counter, breadcrumbs spread all over the surface. There were plastic cups everywhere, toys, gift bags and confetti all over the living room floor.
The front door opened, and Jeonghan slipped inside the apartment, quietly closing the door behind him. The minute he stepped in, you decided to busy yourself by looking for a large trash bag that you had left somewhere in the kitchen.
âWell, thatâs everyone,â Jeonghan said, pleased that all of the guests had gone home. He ran a hand through his hair, sighing.
You started shoving trash into the bag as quickly as you could without making too much noise, and you were half glad that there was so much to do before you went home because you needed to think.
But Jeonghan had already noticed you were in a mood, and you could feel him hovering in the kitchen, trying to get a read on you. âThe party went really well. Everyone had a lot of fun,â he said, his tone gentle.
You were grabbing a bunch of plastic cups in one hand, throwing them inside the bag without caring that they were still half full. âYeah. Sure,â you huffed, continuing to clean the dining table.
The silence that followed was truly unsettling, making you weigh on the tone you had used and the manner in which you were moving. You were stepping out of control, and you didnât care where you were taking this conversation.
By the time you found the courage to raise your gaze, you found Jeonghan frowning at you. âWhatâs that supposed to mean?â
Air left your lungs like you were suddenly punched in the chest. âDid you have fun today?â you asked, raising your eyebrows. âBecause I didnât.â
Jeonghanâs frown didnât ease; he was confused. But his gaze softened, showing you worry. âWhat do you mean?â he asked, his tone dropping when he added, âDid something happen?â
You left the bag aside on the floor, dropping your arms at your sides in a defeated manner. âI mean, I spent the entire evening running around, trying to make sure everything worked,â you said, gesturing around you. âI made the food, drinks, decorations, and cleanup. I didnât have the chance to sit down once.â
Jeonghan blinked. âYou didnât have to do all that.â
You sighed. âThatâs easy to say now.â
He shifted his weight, motioning to approach you. âThatâs not what I meantââ
âI know,â you cut him off, putting a hand between him and you. âI know you meant it nicely.â
You could feel the waves of emotion coming closer, coming to get you. And your body acted off of instinct, picking up one stray napkin on the table and folding it in half, almost as though preparing yourself to have something in your hand for when you started crying.
With a tearless sob, you added. âIt wouldâve been nice if someone had noticed while it was happening.â
Jeonghanâs frown disappeared. âI noticed.â
âDid you?â you asked, still holding your emotions back.
âOf course I did,â he said, his tone dropping to an even gentler one.
But you could still feel the tears prickling in your eyes, everything you held back making you taste them in your tongue. âThen why was I still doing everything while everyone else was enjoying the party?â
Jeonghan tilted his head to one side, looking at you as though finding you endearing that you were about to cry for something like this, but still approached you with caution. âWhy didnât you ask for help?â he said, and then he hesitated, almost as though wanting to take back his words, so he added instead, âI was busy with things as well, I thought we were both busy, baby.â
You deadpanned to him. âYou really didnât think I wanted to enjoy the party too?â
He opened his mouth, his eyes widening as his mind started to reel, you knew it.
But you kept going. âI wanted to sit down with her when she opened her presents. Or be next to her when she blew out the candles. Honestly, Jeonghan, I felt like a guest at a party I helped throw. I couldnât even hold Sohee for two minutes!â
His face fell in utter worry, his shoulders going slack. âIs this all because Soomin wanted to hold her?â he asked, his tone hollow, like he now couldnât believe you were throwing a tantrum over this.
You let out an exasperated sigh. âNoâ! Yes! But itâs not only that!â you stammered.
Jeonghan stepped back, but just slightly, as though he wanted to take a good look at your faceâdisbelief still contorting his face. âSoomin was just trying to have a moment with her as well,â he shook his head. âI donât see that as a bad thing. Maybe youâre reading too much into it.â
âAm I?â you asked, raising your tone.
And Jeonghan sighed. âBaby⊠sheâs Soheeâs mother.â
It wasnât necessarily cruel. His tone was devoid of venom, but it still hurtâlike a bitter truth being forced down your bloodstream, burning and leaving an ache in its wake.
Your entire body shook before a powerful shudder. âRight,â you said slowly.
Jeonghan immediately realized the weight of his words, the pain translating in your features. âWaitââ he said, his jaw set tight as his eyes widened in worry. âBaby, I didnât mean it like that. I meantââ
You shook your head. âNo, I get it,â you said, but your voice had lost all power, and the wall you had put between reason and emotions crumbled. Tears burst in your eyes, and a sob broke through your chest.
âYouâre right. Iâm not her mom,â you continued, giving him a brittle smile. âI never forgot that. Not for a second,â you said, voice cracking slightly. âYou know, I keep reminding myself of that. Of where I stand.â
Jeonghan took another step towards you, this time more decisive. âBaby, youâre blowing this out of proportion,â he said, trying to be nice still, trying to figure out how to calm you down.
You looked down to wipe your tears. Confetti was spread all over the floor, and your stomach twisted at the thought of how this scene might appear from the outside. The apartment was a messâgift bags, wrapping paper, candy, and new toys scattered across the living room. A half-eaten cake sat on the table, and balloons were stuck to the walls. The lights in the kitchen and living room remained on. You and Jeonghan were arguing, trying to keep your voices down so as not to disturb the little girlâs sleep.
You finally found the strength to look at him again. And when Jeonghan saw your tired face, fear replaced the worry in his eyes. He saw the determination in your eyesâhe knew you well. âI think Iâm going to go.â
Jeonghan sighed, motioning a step closer. âItâs late. Stay,â he said, his tone still wrapped in a careful gentleness.
You shook your head. âI donât think thatâs a good idea, Jeonghan,â you said, your tone fading into a mere whisper. âIâm going home.â
He took a pause, studying you with his gaze roaming all over the features of your face, finding something in your eyes that made you wonder what you would look like. Because he seemed to lose all composure. âBaby, come on,â he said, his eyebrows drawn in. âWe just had a fight. That doesnât mean you need to leave.â
You sighed tiredly. âIt wasnât just a fight, Jeonghan,â you said calmly. All need to fight was gone now. You had lost. You shook your head. âIâm done.â
You turned around, heading towards the door. But you caught a glimpse of Jeonghanâs expression, the shock and worry making his eyes wide and glistening. âBaby.â
You grabbed your sweater and your handbag. The only two non-disposable belongings you had in his house.
âBaby,â he insisted again, more firmly now. âYouâre not seriously leaving because of something I said.â
You paused, but you didnât let the moment catch you in your determination. âItâs not just something you said. Itâs a fact.â
Jeonghan stiffened, but words got stuck in his mouth, making his throat bob visibly.
You wrapped your fingers around the doorknob. And then all self-control slipped out of your hands. âToday I learned two things. One is that I was changing my whole life to fit into yours,â you told him, pulse quickening when you realized what you were doing, what you were breaking. âAnd the other thing is that I was the only one doing that.â
Jeonghan took a weak step towards you, his eyes showing the realization of what was about to happen. âWe can still figure things out,â he whispered, eyes wide and glossy.
And something reminded you of how easy Soomin walked back into Jeonghan and Soheeâs life, how fleeting her presence was compared to the mess you had in your hands now. Your heart was breaking, and you couldnât fit in your head how easy it was for her to walk out and walk back in. You envied that for a split second, because now you had a broken heart to fix.
Jeonghan still thought the problem was logical. And not something you had been wanting him to truly see.
You took in a deep breath. âGoodbye, Jeonghan,â you whispered, slipping out through the door and shutting it quietly behind you.
Coming back home to your apartment felt hauntingly out of the ordinary. It was as though you were stepping into a scene that had been put on pause. There was a forgotten glass of juice half empty on the kitchen counter, and you couldnât remember leaving it there. The ironing board was standing in the middle of the living room, iron unplugged and in the holderâtwo things you had left there while in a hurry to get to your work in time. Plants all over the apartment were starting to wither, neglected.
A secondary instinct kicked in, telling you that at this hour youâd be helping Jeonghan tidy the place up while Sohee slept. Youâd be stacking toys back into their place, folding blankets while Jeonghan did the dishes.
You closed your eyes slowly, finally hurting when you realized that you had walked out on all of it.
And your apartment didnât feel like home.
You left your things on the counter and decided to plop down on the couch, face down against the cushions. Your pulse hadnât slowed down since the moment youâd said goodbye to Jeonghanâand when you collapsed on the couch, you realized that you were crying. And you werenât crying angry tears like when you were having a fight with Jeonghan, no.
You sobbed uncontrollably, tears kept coming and blurring your vision. And there was nothing in your mind except the memory of Jeonghanâs face when you walked out on him. You did the right thing, you told yourself, but your heart felt empty.
It had been the right thing. That much was true.
You loved Jeonghan. You loved Sohee.
Somewhere in the kitchen, you heard your phone buzzing, vibrating furiously inside your handbag. You ignored it. And you ignored it ten times all through the night, until it eventually ceased ringing.
Quiet settled around the empty apartment. An apartment that was yours, with all the things you built on your own. And the worst part is that it didnât feel like home anymore. You kept wanting to reach for your car keys and leave somewhere.
Did you overreact? You wondered. I probably did blow everything out of proportion. You thought, remembering Soominâs satisfied face when she told you that you were brave for stepping into her shoes.
Your chest tightened.
But you pushed it down.
The first twenty hours were hell.
Thatâs how Jeonghan felt. Like a long, gruelling torture that only pushed him to reflect.
The balloons on the wall had started to deflate, but he didnât want to take them down. The rest of the things that you had prepared for the party had already been cleaned up, one thing that Jeonghan had done the morning after you left. It helped him think instead of bombarding your voicemail with messages pleading with you to call him back.
I could just go to her apartment, he thought. But he imagined the sceneâSohee on his arms as he begged you to come back. And he instantly pushed the idea away.
The apartment was awfully quiet. Until his phone started to vibrate on the dining table, making his stomach drop, and his hand reached for it instantly, thinking it was you, finally calling him back.
Soomin.
Jeonghan sighed, his heart deflating.
But then, a knock came to the front door. And for a moment, he thought he imagined it.
Then it came again. You knocked two quick times, deciding to step back from it and wait, clasping the gift bag with your hands. Standing there, your gaze fell out of focus, and inevitably started comparing the times you had stood there, how quickly Jeonghan would get to the door and welcome you in with open arms.
When Jeonghan finally opened the door, it was the first time you had seen him truly torn. It was normal for you to see him untidy after a long day at work, hair messy, unmade tie, untucked shirt, whatever. But no, this time was different. His face was darkened by the dark circles under his eyes, but it was the deep, conflicted sparkle in them that disheartened you completely.
âHi,â you croaked, and cleared your throat nervously.
Jeonghan let out a quick sigh, running a palm down his mouth and chin before stepping aside, letting you in.
Your stomach twisted. You didnât know what you were expecting him to say, but silence was the last thing you had anticipated. But you stepped into the apartment anyway, immediately spotting the quietness, which could only indicate one thing.
âWhere is she?â you muttered, turning around to see Jeonghan shutting the door behind him quietly.
âAsleep,â he told you quietly, leaning back against the door with his hands tucked behind his back. You noticed the tired look he gave you, but that wasnât the only thing that consumed your attention whollyâhe was wary. âI just put her to bed.â
Your heart squeezed one more time, and you gave him a reproachful look. âOh, okay,â you sighed, looking at the green gift bag in your hands. âThen Iâll leave this with you. Sheâll like it, Iâm sure. Itâs aâitâs an axolotl plushie,â you said, stammering over your words with the need to hurry and get this over with. You wanted to run back to your car and cry.
Jeonghan nodded, licking his lips in a way that told you he had a lot to say, but decided to remain quiet. See how things would unfold first.
But this wasnât going according to your plans. Your eyes began to brim with tears, which you blinked away quite successfully. âI wanted to see her one last time. Say goodbye properly,â you told him, tone lowering as your throat closed up.
He leaned the back of his head against the door, and as he blinked slowly, you saw his walls crumble down. âI know,â he said, his tone lowered too. He swallowed hard, his throat bobbing visibly.
You saw him blink up, fixing his gaze on the ceiling. âIs that why you put her to bed earlier than usual?â you asked keenly. âSo I wouldnât get to see her?â
Jeonghan nodded slowly, moving his arms and crossing them on his chest. âI didnât want her to see this. Iâm sorry,â he shrugged with a look of pity on his face. âBut I think we should talk first.â
You felt your brow furrowing. âI thought we already talked, Jeonghan. Last night,â you said, feeling lost.
âYeah, but last night you walked out on me,â he said, tilting his head to one side as his gaze changed, quickly being filled with disappointment and resentment. He pushed himself away from the door, approaching you with the same wariness.
âThere was nothing left to say,â you muttered, trying to keep down the tight knot sitting in your throat.
âReally?â he gasped, stopping dead in his tracks just one step in front of you. His face had fallen in something that went far beyond resentment now, like uncontrolled exasperation and anger. âWe couldâve solved things last night before you ended everything!â
Shame filled your bloodstream, coursing through your body and leaving your skin feeling hot and prickling with anger. You carefully set down the gift bag on the table, deciding to leave. âI wonât let anyone treat me like Iâm second-best, Jeonghan. Thatâs why I walked out.â
It was as though you had slapped him in the face. He stepped back, blinking in a way that told you that your words had hurt him. But before you could have a confirmation on this, Jeonghan took another step, but now in your direction. âI didnât treat you like second-best,â he replied, his face crumpling with hurt, and most shockingâyou saw fear in his eyes.
âNo? I was trying to make everything perfect for Sohee. And by the end of it, what did I get? Your ex walking all over me like Iâm her stand-in!â you blurted, words coming out raw and shaky. But you were glad that, despite the overwhelming need to cry, you could still speak what troubled your heart.
Jeonghan looked at you like he was finally seeing the truth. Almost as though he had willingly blindfolded himself throughout the party last night, but now, he finally saw something he didnât want to.
So, with heat flooding your chest, you continued, âYou truly didnât notice, Jeonghan? The tacit remarks sheâd make? Or when I wanted to hold Sohee and she would casually step in? Or what about the moment she told me I was brave for doing what she couldnât?â you said. Your throat tightened, anger burning as tears finally spilled. You wiped them angrily, refusing to look away.
âShe said that?â he said with an empty look in his eyes as his shoulders sagged a little. âI didnât hear her. I actually thought she was being nice. For once.â
âMaybe you didnât want to see it because she was being nice to you,â you accused, crossing your arms to hold yourself steady. Or to protect yourself. âThatâs myproblem. She doesnât have to fight for a space!â
âThatâs not fair. You donât have to fight for a spaceââ
âNo, but I do,â you interrupted, blood heating up after remembering how it felt. âAnd whatâs not fair was pretending she was being nice. She knew exactly what she was doing, and whether you meant it or not, you let her.â
âI shouldâve known she would do things when I wasnât looking,â Jeonghan replied, his tone firm. But then his gaze softened, right as he too crossed his arms, making you think that he was guarding himself up as well.
You let out a resigned sigh. âBut this isnât truly about your ex, Jeonghan,â you finally said, gulping hard. âThis is about us failing to do things right.â
And when he lifted his gaze back to you, you noticed a glint in his eyes, like sorrow taking over him. He wasnât crying, but your heart slowed down at seeing that torn-up look on him. Your words had struck a nerve. âThis isnât on meâI tried making things right!â he said, not lifting his tone, his words devoid of heat.
âYou were rushing into things! Asking me to move in? Putting me as the emergency contact on Soheeâs file without telling me?â you said, trying to keep your tone light, but instead you sounded like you were on the brink of tears again.
He still looked hurt, but now, he was beginning to detach himself from youâand you could tell. He shook his head like he couldnât believe you, running a hand down his mouth, frustratedly. âI thought that you moving in with us would make us stronger. But now I know we werenât on the same page with that.â
You understood why he delivered his words dryly, but it still made your aching heart deflate even more. Tears burst from your eyes again, and you hated that you were now out of control. âI just wanted to know that you werenât just looking for someone to share the burden with.â
He let out a huff, a cold smile painting his face. âI donât need someone to share the burden with; I have been doing fine on my own since Soomin left.â
You rolled your eyesâhe was missing the point. âI wanted to be certain that you wanted me.â
That left him cold. His arms were still crossed on his chest, but you saw the smallest of budges, as though the very air had left his lungs, cracking that wall he was putting between you. âIs that it? Is that why you said no?â he asked, his tone softer. He motioned to approach you, but the look on your face stopped him.
You were fully crying now. No sobbing, no hiccupping, no runny nose. Just unstoppable tears streaking down your cheeks. Your lip trembled, just as you were looking for the words to tell him what you needed to hear from him.
His mind reeledâyou could tell from the way his gaze shifted quickly, dropping from your face to the ground and then back to you. His brow twitched. âI thought you knew.â
You nodded. âI still needed to hear it, Jeonghan.â
His gaze fell to the space between you, as though trying to untangle this mess in his mind.
But it didnât matter now. Nothing he could say now would ease the pain in your chest. You were done now. You wanted to go home.
You didnât say goodbye this time. You didnât want to drag it any further.
You walked past him, rushing to the door before he could stop youâor to be quick and have the confirmation that he wouldnât try to stop you. And when you were safe in the elevator, your heart broke anew when you blinked and saw the image of Jeonghan standing in the dining room, a grief-stricken look on his face.
Oh, this would take you months to heal.
Your friends were right. Getting into a relationship with someone like Jeonghan would only bring you pain. Nothing else.
The walk from the elevator to where you had parked your car was excruciatingly long. Your chest was constricting more and more as you fished your key out of the pocket of your jeans, unlocking the car door from afar.
âWait!â
Jeonghanâs raw voice crossed the parking lot like lightning shooting through the night sky. You stopped, not because you wanted to follow the request, but because of the sheer shock of knowing that heâd chased you down to the parking lot.
Jeonghan was catching up, running to where you stood, frozen to the ground. âWait,â he pleaded, breathing hard as he reached you. âDonât go⊠please.â
Had he run down the emergency stairs just to catch you before you got in your car? Had he left Sohee alone just to get to you? You stared at him, beyond disbelief.
He composed himself with one deep breath, raising his palms at you warily. âI know I donât deserve this, but please hear me out.â
When you didnât respond, a wild look of fear shot across his face, making his eyes widen slightly. âI didnât ask you to move in with us because I wanted someone to share the burden of being a parent,â he said, his words honest despite the tremble in his tone. âI said those things because Sohee is my priority. I was dumb, and that was the first thing that popped into my mind. I wasnât thinking of how I sounded.â
He gulped air, hard. âI asked you to move in with us because I feel empty when youâre not around,â he said, more fiercely, his eyes glimmering as he took another step towards you. âI asked you to move in with me because of the most selfish reasonâbecause I donât want to be without you.â
And then the look in his eyes turned to complete despair when you remained motionless. His confession had done nothing to you, or so he appeared to believe. But your heart was beating wildly, thumping in your eardrums. You stood there, torn between holding your ground and giving in to him.
His mouth parted, and he took half a pace to where you stood. But he stopped, as though all strength and courage had dissipated the moment your eyes began to brim with tears again. âPlease,â he whispered, gulping hard once again. And you knew what he was feelingâhis heart thrumming in his throat. âDonât do this.â
He wasnât scared of losing a perfect candidate for his exâs stand-in. Noâand you were a fool to have believed that. You had seen the terrible person his ex was and still decided to run with that idea.
What you had failed to remember was that Jeonghan had gone through difficult breakups before. His ex left him with a baby in his arms. And even if his relationship with Soomin had been loveless from the start, it was still hard, and it still hurt.
God knows how long it had been since Jeonghan felt love.
And the truth is, you trusted that not even he remembers it as well.
Jeonghan was exceptionally bad at sharing his feelings aloud. That is one thing youâve learned in all eight months youâve been with him. But then you saw his posture change, the strength in him waning. âI wonât let things go this way again,â he told you, his eyes pleading.
A brutal shudder coursed through you. You loved this man. There was no way you could just turn around and walk away.
Your lip trembled. âYou promise?â
It was as though life had been injected into him, hope glimmering in his eyes now. âI promise,â he replied.
With just a couple of paces, you closed the space between you and him, grabbing him by the collar of his black t-shirt and pulling him in. And he simply let you, receiving the impact of your smaller body against his by grabbing you by the waist, already knowing you were aiming for a kiss.
Your lips clashed with his in a crushing kiss; it almost hurt, but you didnât care. Your body brimmed with energy, making your fingers curl around the fabric of his t-shirt. It was a leap of faithâbut this time, you were ready. âI love you,â you said, squeezing your eyelids tightly.
A small sigh escaped him. âI love you too,â he replied, switching his hands from your waist to your face, cupping it before going back to kissing you. âPlease, stay,â he whispered before pressing his lips against yours tightly.
You melted in his embrace. âOkay,â you replied, nodding.
He wrapped you with his arms completely, placing one hand on your back and the other on your head, making your face nuzzle against the crook of his neck. âYou scared me,â he whispered, the sound of his voice strangled.
You swallowed hard. âYou scared me too,â you admitted.
He kissed the top of your head, moving to cup your face again. âI know this doesnât solve everything,â he said, his tone brittle. Thatâs when you noticed his eyelashes crumpled with tears. âSo I think we should talk about what comes next.â
You shifted slightly to get the tears on the corners of your eyes. âWhat do you mean?â
He seemed to calm down with one breath. âSoomin is still going to be part of our lives.â
You nodded. âI know.â
His eyebrows knitted slightly. âAnd sometimes our lives will get messy.â
âI know that, Jeonghan,â you whispered, smiling at him softly.
He caressed your cheek tenderly. âBut I want you to talk to me every time something feels off,â he said.
âAnd will you?â you asked.
He nodded. âEvery single time,â he said. âI want us to be stronger together.â
The certainty in his demeanour made you pause. âYou mean that?â you asked with a tiny tone.
âYes, I do,â he replied. âI shouldâve told you this before. I donât want to be without you.â
And now the honesty was the thing that disarmed you completely. For a second, you almost felt like your vulnerable side was about to win, but you sighed. âI was jealous of her,â you confessed.
He blinked in disbelief. âOf Soomin?â
You nodded. âSheâs Soheeâs mom. I didnât like to feel that I was competing with her.â
âYou werenât,â he said with certainty. âThings got messy yesterday. I didnât notice she was trying to make you feel insecure.â
You shook your head lightly. âThis whole thing feels ridiculous now.â
He frowned. âWhat does?â
âAll of this,â you gestured to the space between you and him. âWe nearly blew up our entire relationship because we couldnât talk about what we actually feel.â
He let out a light laugh. âIt wonât happen again,â he said, stepping back and grabbing your hand, motioning back to the building. âLetâs go back inside?â
You nodded, walking with him, feeling ten times lighter than before.
You both stepped into the elevator, still holding hands. But as soon as the doors closed, Jeonghan tugged at your hand, pulling you closer to his frame. He wrapped an arm around your waist, finding your cheek with the other hand. âWill you forgive me?â he mumbled softly, smiling at you like he was shy. âI let things go out of hand.â
Your heart softened again, making you choke up, so you just nodded. âMe too,â you whispered. âI apologize too.â
He blinked slowly. âWe talked about this before, remember?â he told you. âMy life is messy, and I havenât had a relationship since Soomin. I think this is us trying to find the balance in everything.â
You smiled at him. âPlease donât tell me that finding the balance will look like this every time.â
He laughed lightly. âI told you, baby. I wonât let this happen again,â he said, full of certainty. âI mean it.â
You sighed softly, relief finally setting in. âOkay,â you whispered, closing your eyes as he leaned in to kiss you, pressing his lips against yours ever so tenderly, like he was trying to isolate every single feeling and just focus on how your lips felt against his.
The kiss deepened, lips locking together in a heated dance that had your blood dancing in your veins almost instantly. A moan bubbled in your mouth when you felt the tip of his tongue swiping on your bottom lip, touching your tongue as it rolled inside your mouth.
You placed a hand square on his chest. âDonât think youâre off the hook,â you said, faking a stern look on your face.
The elevator reached the floor, doors parting with a soft ding. Jeonghan took your hand again, as though not wanting to let you go for one second. âI didnât think it would be that easy,â he said with a smirk. âBut please tell me what I can do to get there faster.â
You laughed. âWell, first, you could give me a neck massage.â
He raised his eyebrows. âThatâs starting strong?â he laughed.
âAnd take me for dinner at that restaurant you keep telling me you wanted to take me,â you said.
âYou free tomorrow?â he said while opening the door for you.
He quickly pushed your back against the wall of the hall to his bedroom, locking his lips with yours in a quick, but passionate kiss. âI could pick you up at eight,â he said, his tone raw.
âI dunno. Iâll have to check my calendar,â you replied jokingly, putting your hands on his chest, feeling him up.
Jeonghan giggled into the kiss. âYou do that,â he replied.
You smiled, letting him dominate the kiss. And Jeonghan quickly took on the task, kissing you vehemently, like putting every emotion he felt for you into a silent dance of his lips with yours. His hands slipped from your face, finding your waist to clutch on as his tongue rolled inside your mouth.
You moaned, feeling his tongue against yours sent a shiver down your spine. Your hands on his torso slipped further down, finding the hem of his clothes and slipping beneath his shirt, feeling his warm skin.
The muscle of his abdomen contracted softly. âWaitââ Jeonghan said, pausing mid-kiss with a smacking sound from his lips and yours. âBathroom.â
You were only able to moan out a sound of affirmation. The door to the bathroom was a couple of steps away from you, and when you both got there, it was as though a lightbulb had been switched on in your mind. Jeonghan was intending to take you to the most secluded place in the houseâfar away from the babyâs room.
Jeonghan turned the lights on with one hand, undoing the button of his jeans with the other. You acted quicklyâtaking one step in his direction and grabbing the black t-shirt, enjoying the look in his eyes, the hunger, the lust and devotion in them.
The clothes came off quietlyâhurriedly, while his gaze remained trained on your face. Jeonghan was quiet, unusually quiet as you worked your trembling fingers to undress him. âDo you want to undress me?â you mumbled, your tone sweet, but low.
He blinked slowly and nodded, biting his bottom lip. He first grabbed the hem of your tank top, hiking it up your torso while you raised your arms to help him in the process. His gaze shifted to your chest when your bralette came into view. âI like this,â he whispered, running the pad of his thumb along the pretty lace hem of the cup of the bralette. âYou know I like this one.â
You smiled softly. âIf youâre suggesting that I wore the bra you liked to break up with you in case something happened, then youâre sorely mistaken,â you replied smugly.
He matched your smile. âIâm glad,â he whispered, tilting his head to meet your lips with his. He kissed you once, softly at first, his lips creating a low smacking sound when he pulled back, but not far. âIâm glad you didnât break up with me.â
âI guess all we needed was to talk it out,â you joked in between hurried, heated pecks. Then your breath hitched, Jeonghanâs cold fingers had found the clasp of your bralette.
Jeonghan sighed in amusement. âWho wouldâve thought,â he replied with an obvious tone while his hands gently eased the straps off your shoulders, and took your bra off your chest.
You needed one second to take in the situation inâyou had just gone through one of the worst moments of your life, thinking that you were breaking up with the man you had fallen head over heels for. And now to be back in his apartment, hiding in the bathroom with him so that whatever went down in there wouldnât wake the baby up.
It felt strangely exciting.
He pushed the tip of his nose against yours softly, making you angle your face as he swiped the tip of his tongue on your bottom lip, asking for entrance. You parted your mouth, letting him in with a silent moan, right as his tongue found yours. He kissed you slowly, sensually, like he had been aching to do that for the longest time, but things just got in the way.
You understood then, all the intense gazes, the way he kept looking at your lipsâŠ
âFrom now on, Iâll tell you everything,â he told you suddenly, giving you small kisses as his hands came up to cup your face lovingly. âEvery single thought that crosses my brain, youâll know it.â
You laughed at that, the sound louder than anything else; it bounced off the walls in a denouncing manner.
âQuiet, baby,â Jeonghan uttered, but he let out a tiny giggle with you anyway. âSohee might hear you.â
You couldnât help it; your heart melted. âSorry,â you whispered, but the smile didnât wipe off your face.
He tilted his head to one side, smiling endearingly at you. âI have a feeling you like this,â he muttered, voice low like a purr.
You nodded, biting your lower lip as you pushed his boxers down.
âYou like it when I tell you to be quiet,â he kept going, keeping his tone down.
His gaze dropped to your hands as you grabbed his cock and started stroking him with your hand wrapped around the underside of his shaft. He had a pretty cock, soft and veiny on his thick shaft, dark pink on its head.
Seeing your hand rolling up and down his erect cock made him swallow a grunt, but as you twisted your grip around him, the sounds he made grew louder. How easy it was for him to surrender under your touch caused a deep satisfaction to bloom in your chest. But more than that, arousal had already started to pulsate between your legs. You enjoyed giving him pleasure just as much as you enjoyed receiving it.
âI like everything you do, daddy,â you mumbled, your tone wrapped in honey.
âFuck,â he sighed, pressing his forehead against yours. He slipped his hands on your waist, clutching your skin tightly but not enough for it to burn. âYou make me crazy.âÂ
Your fist tightened around the crown of his cock, smearing the slick precum leaking from his slit. You loved pleasuring him, yes, but you needed him inside youâthe thrumming between your legs ached to feel him. A cunning smile painted your lips, considering playing with him some more.
But Jeonghan caught that naughty smirk on your face.
In one motion, he pushed your back to the countertop of the sink. You gasped at the sudden movement, but before you could protest, he was already getting to one knee in front of you.
âIf you make a single sound, Iâll stop,â he told you, his eyes darkened with need and lust.
And without waiting for your verbal response, his head dipped down, pressing his mouth to your mound. He kissed the top of your pussy first, pressing his lips to your skin tenderly, almost adoringly as his sweet brown eyes found yours, but briefly. You let out a ragged breath, parting your legs by half, sitting on the countertop. That gave him all the access to your slick folds, which he nipped and licked eagerly.
You instantly tensed, your hand finding his head and the other holding onto the basin like your life depended on it. Jeonghan knew you well; he knew how you liked being touched, how to eat your pussy out until you were a mess of tears and babbles. He knew how to make you cum. What he was doing now was just to tease you, to drive you crazyâlicking the juices off your folds with pleased grunts from his part, loving the way you were always ready for him.
He grabbed your thighs, spreading you further apart so you stopped twitching and movingâand licked your pussy up and down slowly, thoroughly, only to tease you some more.
But then he finally wrapped his lips around your clit, sucking it ever so lightly.
Your jaw went slack, and to not let a scream out, the hand that was previously clutching the basin flew and landed on the tap, accidentally pushing it open. The sound of water flowing freely was the perfect mask for your whiny moans, because Jeonghan had started to run his tongue flatly on top of your engorged clit, all the while his lips kept it trapped.
Thoughts ceased to exist. Nothing mattered to you except for the sweet waves of pleasure running uncontrollably through your veins, making your skin prickle and your nipples pebble. It was as though you were submerged in a pool of pleasure. Your breathing turned ragged, and your body tensed solely to let the orgasm build upâbecause Jeonghan wasnât stopping, and apparently, he had forgotten about the no noise rule.
Or maybe he liked this too.
But then he lifted his face slightly, keeping his lips and tongue on the top of your pussy as his lust-filled gaze met yours. You sank your teeth on your bottom lip, using the hand that was cradling the back of his head to push his face against your cunt, begging him silently to continue.
Jeonghan eyed the basin swiftly, briefly. And that was all the command you needed. You pushed your thumb against the tap, shutting it off.
However, he continued being a tease. Or a menace. He dragged his tongue against your swollen clit, pushing the wet muscle against you, achingly slow.
Your eyebrows pinched. Please, you begged with just one look.
There was a smile that only showed in his eyes right before he resumed eating you out, sucking and licking your clit. And he only needed to do it for mere thirty seconds before your orgasm tore through your body. You forgot about pulling his hair, taking that hand against your own mouth to stop yourself from screaming.
The waves of pleasure running through you were beyond anything else youâve felt before. Heâd teased you for so long that you were very much ready for that orgasm, leaving you limp and trembling on the countertop.
Your chest was rising and falling dramatically. Embarrassed, you cast a look at Jeonghan, who was pushing himself onto his feet with a light but wicked grin on his face. He didnât need to say anything, he knew that youâd liked that.
And you needed him now.
You grabbed his wrist, pulling so that he stood between your thighs. âWait,â he whispered, sliding his hands on your thighs to bring you to a halt.
You instantly knew what heâd say. You shook your head. âI want you now,â you mumbled.
But he motioned a hand to the cabinet behind you, where you knew he kept one large box of condoms. He kept it there and would also restock the bedside table every night you stayed in.
You grabbed him by the hip, pulling him closer to your body. âNow,â you whined.Â
Jeonghan didnât resist, didnât question you.
His hands returned to your thighs, wrenching them further apart and positioning himself between them. Tilting your hips up, you angled yourself for him while still sitting back on the countertopâyou knew he liked the view of his bare cock entering you, the view of your pussy stretched open with his girth.
So his head dipped, keeping his gaze where your body and his were about to join. He pushed his hips closer to yours, and you took his cock, guiding it to your sopping core. His mouth parted when the crown of his cock nuzzled your entrance, and a rush of excitement flowed through you when you felt him push inside.
Feeling him raw, skin on skin, was a delicious experience. Maybe it was more in your brain than in your bodyâbecause you swore you could cum right there and then, and he wasnât even fully inside you.
You caught a glimpse of his face changing, of the pleasure taking over him quickly as he gave the first thrust, the muscle of his jaw twitched, and he immediately crushed his mouth with yours. With a muffled moan, he started moving, languidly at first, as though testing you.
âGod, baby, you feel⊠amazing,â he whispered, pushing his hips with gentle motions. You believed that he wanted to take it slowly, so he wouldnât finish fast and inside you. But then you heard how fucking wet you were. You could hear his cock slipping in and out of your walls, and Jeonghan wanted to enjoy it.
You cupped the side of his neck with one hand, motioning his gaze back to yours. You stared into his eyes for a long moment while he took your body slowly. Jeonghan blinked, his hands grabbing your thighs and motioning them around his hips, making it even harder for him to pull out.
It was a game you both had. And it made you feral. You loved it.
Jeonghan pushed his body flushed against yours, thrusting slowly, but deeply. âLike that?â he asked, although he didnât need toâthe look on your face told him enough.
But you nodded either way. You remembered what he said about telling you every single thought that crossed his brain, and you decided to give him some of your thoughts in return. âI love this,â you whispered. âI love feeling you like this.â
He let out a grunt, bowing his head to kiss your shoulder. âI know,â he sighed, his breath fanning your pert nipples. âI love it too.â
You slipped your hand from his neck and then locked your arms around his shoulders. All reason flew out of your brain, and then you knew you were just babblingâbut you didnât care. âThe thought of you cumming inside me makes me cum,â you mumbled, uncaring of how pathetically sweet your tone sounded.
âOh, fuck,â Jeonghan moaned loudly, the sound barely muffled by the crook of your neck, hips stuttering against yours for half a second.
You cupped his nape with your hand as he lifted his head to face you. âYeah?â he hummed, his gaze taking you in. âWant me to pump you full of my cum?â he asked with a playful lilt.
You nodded, incapable of giving him a verbal reply. The question was crude; it sounded beyond dirty and sinful as it came out of his lips. This surely wasnât the first time he spoke filthy things to you, but it was the first time he asked a question like this.
And you loved it.
The pacing of his thrusts quickened, but didnât relent on their depth, keeping his body flush against yours. You could feel the film layer of sweat covering his skin, and for a moment, you couldnât tell if you were sweating as well.
But you noticed that Jeonghan was forgetting about your game of keeping quiet. The pacing of his thrusts quickening also meant that the sounds of skin slapping against skin were harder to avoid. You thought of mentioning this to him, but it turned you on to see him lose control slowly.
âBabe,â you whispered, âbe quiet.â
Jeonghan had to bite his smile back. And fuck, you loved this man. One of the things you loved about him was how sexy he could be. He pushed his hips against yours in a particularly thorough way that made you think he was trying to reach as deep into you as he could, making you whimper loudly.
âYou be quiet,â he bit back, continuing to slip his cock in and out of your walls deliciously, making you see stars.
Your eyelids fell closed, but you could capture the image of him leaning his face closer to yours, feeling his breath on your lips before he kissed them. âQuiet or you wonât get to cum,â he said, his tone raspy, tired.
âDoesnât that mean you wonât either?â you taunted, loving the way the pacing of his thrusts changed. You knew he was trying to draw out his own pleasure, make himself last longer.
Jeonghan laughed, the sound languid. âRemember how I got you to shut up that one time?â he asked, his tone still low, waning. And when the memory instantly flashed behind your closed lids, your walls tightened around him, drawing out a moan from him.
That time, he showed you a different side of himself. You were being louder than most nights, having fun by testing how far Jeonghan would go to make you submit to him.
âYeah, you remember it,â he drawled, moving his face ever so slightly so he could join his lips with yours, all while still moving inside you painfully slow. He was edging you, and in turn, he was edging himself as well. âI thought you looked pretty with my cock inside your mouth,â he said.
You couldâve fallen over the edge in that second. A shameful whine came out of you, but you were too gone to even think of how pathetic you were sounding. You didnât care. Having Jeonghan inside you, raw, and speaking filth to you felt so good. âIâll be quiet, Hannie,â you told him. âJust donât stop.â
With a grunt, Jeonghan obliged, changing the push and pull from a painfully slow one to a deliciously hard and deep one. You let out a silent moan, angling your hips to him so he could reach deeper inside you, so you could feel him completely.
Jeonghan cussed, his voice drowned out by the dull sound of skin hitting against skin. And it was then that you knew that this was his obsessionâthe quiet play, the bickering, the very obvious sounds of pleasureâŠ
And you simply let him take you. The closer he grew to his orgasm, the closer you felt like giving in to the sweet pleasure dancing beneath your skin. Jeonghan parted his mouth, and you felt his hips buckling, his hands gripping your hips, his body flush and pushing against yoursâŠ
âFuck, baby,â he said with a tired, but blissful drawl. âIâm close,â he said, his words heavy with meaning. Â
And you knew what he wanted to say. âInside,â you moaned. âDo it inside me.â
Jeonghan gave you another one of those hazy smiles, tilting his head back so you could see his face, while pleasure took over the features of his beautiful face. âAre you going to cum for me, sweetheart?â he asked, looking like he was in between happy and tired.
You nodded. âUh-huh,â you mewled, aware that the sounds bouncing off the walls of the bathroom had become louder. But you didnât care, and Jeonghan didnât seem to pay attention.
He pushed inside, slamming his front to yours, switching the grip on one side of your thigh to your hair at the base of your head. âThen give it to me,â he whispered, the sound raspy and full of greed. âCum for me.â
You couldâve gone off simply from the way he was talking to you. But you needed to get it done, fast, now. You moved your body slightly, taking your hand in between his body and yours and started rubbing your clit, teasing it with fast swirls. âDaddy,â you moaned, louder. His thrusts were deep, hard, and so fucking good. âFuck, fuck, fuck.â
Jeonghan responded with a deep moan of his own. âBaby,â he gasped, releasing the grip he had on your hair, his hand sliding down your back as he dropped his forehead on your shoulder.
You closed your eyes, letting your orgasm barrel down your body, letting Jeonghan push his cum deep inside you with a couple of final, languid thrusts. His face was pressed tightly against the crook of your neck, making your skin prickle as he breathed hard against you.
The inner side of your thighs trembled quite dramatically as you tried holding onto him. Jeonghan let out a light, breathy giggle, right as you, too, were composing yourself, caressing his naked back with the tips of your fingers.
Then you felt his lips on the crook of your neck, your shoulder, leaving a trail of goosebumps on your skin. âIâll start a shower for you,â he croaked, lifting his head to direct a tender look at you. âI have to go check on Sohee.â
You nodded. âOkay,â you replied.
But there was a great reluctance in his following movements. Casting a look down your body, he carefully peeled his body back from yours, turning around to start the shower. You watched him as he walked back, only to plant a sweet kiss on the tip of your nose before grabbing his shorts and slipping through the bathroom door.
Once you found your limbs, you climbed off the counter and stepping before the shower. After testing the temperature, you stood below the stream, closing your eyes as you let the water wash down your face.
Your heart still felt heavy with the weight of a thousand questions and things that you still wanted to say. But one thing was finally clear to you.
The gentle sounds coming from the door announced he was back, right as you were halfway done washing up. When he stepped into the shower, he immediately wrapped his arms around you, his chest pressing against your back as he embraced you tightly. âHey,â you mumbled, grabbing his forearm to squeeze him.
He inhaled deeply, pressing his lips to your hair. âHey,â he replied, his tone low and raspy.
You turned around, moving on the shower floor so that the stream bathed his bare skin. âLet me,â you said, grabbing the soap and washcloth.Â
Jeonghan gave you a sheepish smile. âOh, are you going to wash me?â he asked, his tone turning playful as you nodded at him silently, looking into his eyes. âAlright, just donât give me those eyes, or weâll never get this done.â
You laughed, the sound filling the bathroom. His glimmering eyes found your face, and you could see the minute his mind snapped with decision. Cupping your face in his hands, he pulled you in for a kiss full of passion and endearment. âI love you,â he mumbled, his tone so gentle that it made you think he was relieved to say it.
âI love you,â you replied, laughing softly before he pressed his lips against yours again.
âWhatâs that?â he asked in between pecks.
âNothing,â you huffed as he moved to kiss your cheek. âYouâre very confident now.â
He responded with a light laugh of his own. âI donât care. Iâm going to say it more,â he told you, sounding serious like a warning.
âGood,â you mumbled faintly, as he bent down to kiss your neck.
âStarting now,â he said, slipping his hands from your lower back to your rear, pressing you against his frame.
âCareful,â you replied. âYou might start sounding desperate,â you teased.
You felt him smile against your skin. âDesperate, huh?â he asked, his voice low and in your ear.
âWell,â you said, tilting your head to give him more space for him to kiss, âyou did just almost lose me.â
He nodded. âThat put things in perspective.â
A sigh escaped your mouth when he kissed a particular sweet spot on your shoulder. âYouâre going a bit overboard.â
âMmm,â he sighed against your skin. hands squeezing your ass, but just softly, tenderly. âI love you.â
You bit back a smile. âSee?â
âYouâre the one who wanted me to say it.â
âI didnât say you had to start saying it every minute,â you said, smiling despite yourself.
He pulled back, making you miss his lips on your skin instantly. âI can slow down.â
You bit your lower lip, nodding. âPlease.â
But he showed you a charming half smile. âI love you.â
You laughed, trying to push his shoulder. âYouâre a tease.â
A pause. The smirk wiped off his face as he exhaled softly. âAnd yet,â he said, his eyes glimmering with something you hadnât seen before in him, âyouâre still here.â
You watched his eyes for a moment, your pulse quickening. âThatâs still under review,â you tried to joke, sounding out of breath.
If Jeonghan heard your tone, he made no comment about it; he played along. âWhat can I do to help my case?â
âI already told you,â you said, looking at his eyes and then his lips.
He nodded, leaning to kiss the tip of your nose. âWhat else?â he whispered.
You slipped your hands from his shoulders, down his torso, feeling his warm and wet skin. âLetâs go to that water park⊠all three of us together.â
He smiled before pressing his lips against yours. âYou got it,â he replied.
Your heart shuddered. âJeonghan?â you mumbled softly, feeling his hands all over your skin, exploring you, getting you aroused again.
âYes?â
âAsk me to move in with you,â you said, tone falling to a mere whisper.
He pulled back, only to look into your eyes. He didnât hesitate. âMove in with me.â
Your eyes glimmered, your whole body trembling with joy, relief, and love. You nodded. âIâll move in with you.â
Jeonghan smiled. âGood,â he mumbled, content. âI love you.â
You groaned softly, rolling your eyes playfully. âOh my god,â you said, loving the sound of his laughter bouncing off the walls. He leaned over, showering you with kisses again. âI love you more,â you replied shyly.
âImpossible,â he said.Â
âș author's note pt. 2: hi hey hello!!
so, we're are so back. and jeonghan is coming back? hannieween is writing again? hell yeah
OKAY BUT I WANT TO TAKE A MOMENT TO ADDRESS SOMETHING HERE. apparently, tumblr has moved some things so that if someone comments, likes or reblogs a post that has been previously reblogged by someone else, i won't get to see those notifs. so for example, if you're not reblogging this from my page directly, i won't get to see it đ so if you guys comment, like, reblog, etc, i appreciate you all so much, i might not get to see it, but i appreciate it anyway!
