Avocado Advocate

I'm in love with the two best damn avocados

[chazchaschad]

I do not have a "side blog”, I do not “schedule posts”. I torture my followers with random bullshit and if that doesn’t work I KILL MYSELF

[zooophagous]

I have been a sheep caretaker for like two days and already I'm like. Wow. I get it.

I get why these were some of the earliest mammals to ever be domesticated. They look up to humans with this sort of dumb but all at once innocent and pure and trusting expression. They're happy to see you. They follow you around. They like to be rubbed under their chins. Maybe its just some latent Scottish highland shepherd DNA I still have in me but I look at my sheep charges and suddenly I see why the love of God for humanity is so often described as a shepherd and his sheep. I'd fight a wolf for these guys. I'd go way the Hell out of my way for them. I'd carry their young for miles on my own back.

[upward-bound]

nearly 80k reblogs and how many of you eat lamb

[zooophagous]

The ancient shepherds I'm referencing also ate lamb lol

[chronicillnesshumor-deactivated]

Doctors are like: ughhhhh. You're confusing. Come back if you die

[shinraalpha]

i do think lobbying for data centres over climate goals should be considered a crime against humanity btw

[hideki-koga]

ブロンズトキ（Glossy Ibis）

[dittography-direwolf]

Totally normal for a legitimate for-profit company to refuse to reclaim or stop running their products even after they're no longer being paid to do so. I'm sure it's very normal to just keep running your service for free when your contract's been terminated. Spending money to continue running cameras that supposedly no one is looking at is definitely not an indicator they are just run by the federal government to spy on everyone and only a wacko conspiracy theorist would think so.

[eroscestlavie]

Why am I finding out just today that Salvador Dali designed the Chupa Chups logo

[eroscestlavie]

????

[eroscestlavie]

Hey. What

[trash-slvt]

"relax. sucking does not kill" would make for a fun shirt

[villainessbian]

I'm sorry chupa chups I didn't know your game

[mihai-florescu]

Languages tend to peak at their word for butterfly. Never seen 2 that are the same, either. Papillon. Mariposa. Borboleta. Fluture. Vlinder. Schmetterling. Pillangó. Babochka. Farfalla. Sommerfugl. Perhonen. Farasha. Titali. Chōchō. Nabi. Húdié. Buom buom. Great job guys, i really mean it.

[phantomknights]

i think people are starting to forget what the LA in LARP means

[asterism343]

*nodding sagely* Los Angeles Role Play

[virtualgirladvance]

okay gang lets find that son of a bitch markiplier

[popsunner]

I love going viral on tumblr.com. It’s like if you stood in a field and said some of the stupidest shit a human being is capable of and then like fifty thousand crows attacked you

[popsunner]

Don’t do this to me

[professional-chaotic-dumbass]

my brother in christ you made the post

[tulipscomeinallsortsofcolors]

[heavensenthousepet]

you learn something new everyday. unless you're a historian. then you learn something old

[melonisopod]

[pekingopera]

[soberscientistlife]

[littledoggy-girlcollar]

some of you have GOT to get comfortable with lying and situational morality and i'm not kidding

[capacity2]

Whenever people complain about how dating bi men is hard bc they got twice as many hoes like yall not the ones suffering. He is the one suffering. Do u know how much of a distraction it is to have hoes coming at you in all shapes and genders and orientations all the pronouns and things ???? Like sit back and think about it. All that bussy titty ass pussy balls cum and squirting closing in on you from every angle it will lead a young man astray if he’s not careful. I thank god every day I just got men to be crazy about bc if I had to pay attention to the seductions of women too I’d be no call no show jobless out on the street begging n sucking dick for a mcchicken a lot of people don’t understand the bisexual to hobosexual pipeline is real and we need to raise awareness. I care do you? Show some compassion

[duncebento]

thank you so much for your poetry

[crazycatsiren]

Just a quick not friendly reminder: someone who has apologized for past mistakes, made amends for past actions, and clearly no longer holds past beliefs, is a far better person than one who digs up old dirt and uses a person's past that no longer exists against them.

[solardrop]

MEGAN THEE STALLION — THOT SHIT (2021)

ˋ°•*⁀➷ for @kcvindays

[cyphir-spacerobot]

Victor Frankenstein after achieving the impossible and building a fucking person from scraps of the dead: Oh god, ew, ew it's ugly! Yucky! Yucky! Gross! Ew! Ew! Yucky! Yucky! Gross! Ew!

[koiagain]