- The guy in front of you in class is shopping for a charcoal grill on ebay. why. sir. we have a test next week.Ā
- Squirrels justā¦.have no fear. None. Only on college campuses though. Are they okay?Ā
- Finding condoms, packaged and not, in various places. 9 times out of 10, if thereās something inside, itās not what the condom is supposed to have inside of it.Ā
- Water balloon condoms. See above.Ā
- That one guy who wears the same hat every day and you see him every day and you donāt understand why heās so attached to this hat what is he hidingĀ
- *single flake of snow appears*Ā āMaybe campus will shut down tomorrow.ā
- Campus doesnāt shut down. Thereās three feet of snow and the wind chill is below zero.Ā
- That one corner of the library basement that no one goes to. It smells old and thereās probably a ghost there.Ā
- When youāre a pedestrian, you hate the cyclists. When youāre on a bicycle, you want nothing more than to run every single person over.Ā
- You see someone violently acting out a music video with their headphones in. You leave them alone because you were doing the same thing thirty minutes ago. Ā You hope it goes well for them.Ā
- Theater majors. Justā¦theater majors.Ā
- do the science kids???? ever leave the science buildings???? where do they sleep?Ā
- Thereās a dog. Itās surrounded in seconds by over-caffeinated, under-hydrated students who havenāt slept in three days.Ā
- you find articles of clothing in really weird places and just. stop caring. glove in a tree? Cool man. Sock on the street? Hope no one needed that. Pants on the stairs of the dorm? Use a condom bro.Ā
- The dorm lobby television only ever plays sports, news, or The Food Network. No one is ever actually watching whatās on.Ā
- how are the art students even aliveĀ
- that one professor that EVERYONE on campus knows, even if they have a completely different major than what they teach.Ā
- thereās a class. you know you had it. you know you have a grade for it. you canāt remember a single second of your time in it.Ā
- Where did that cat come from? No one knows. Itās always been there. You canāt pet it. Only stare from afar.Ā
- what is tipping? how does it work? idk tip the pizza guy five bucks for the ten dollar pizza. he looks tired. heās dying on the inside. he saw a guy naked tonight.Ā
- InevitableĀ āpinned condom on the bulletin board goes missingā gag
- Your whiteboard markers are missing again. You put them out yesterday.Ā
- someone stole an entire skeleton from the science buildings. it got returned a week later without the skull.Ā
- Vocalist majors. Almost as bad as the theater majors. At least the theater kids donāt sing during breakfast.Ā
- thereās a piano in the student lounge. no one can play anything but Chopsticks and Twinkle Twinkle Little Star.Ā
- your garbage is four feet tall and has been there for two weeks. you add more to the top. you took the recycling out yesterday.
